oh, we found it!

gorka. look, damn, how happy my son is!

after all, i gave him back his life, and i will accept you with tail and horns.

the folklore ensemble ramp named after the gnessins has prepared and presented this fairy tale for you today! circus performers romanov arena, champion of russia, winner and prize-winner of international tournaments, evgeny kuznetsov, four-time champion of russia, multiple winner of the european and world championships, maxim koftun, multiple champions of lithuania, multiple winners of the european and world championships, our favorites, margarita da pavel with vanugas. five-time us champion

, multiple winner of the championships of four continents, feter, chernyshov, multiple champions of russia and europe, world champions, olympic champions, victoria senitsina, nikita khatsalapov, and russian champion, european champion, olympic champion, favorite of our hearts, kamilla valieva! meet the creator of today's holiday, multiple european and world champion, olympic champion, tatyana navka, and the team of the ludovo theater under the direction of tatyana navka and pyotr chernyshov.

thank you very much for your applause for your love, i wish us all happiness. a fairy tale will knock on our door, and the heart will serve in the heart for centuries.

probably the greatest happiness is when all your loved ones are nearby, alive, healthy, children have absolutely everything for their full development, yes semyon, absolutely true, cheerful team, mood, dream, desire, aspiration, goals, victory, picnics, walks, we go on rides, first of all, i am an altruist, that is, i strive to do good to other people, as well as... to society in our country as a whole, we give flowers and a good mood, so we wish everyone a great mood, russia, be happy. i wish our country to prosper, to have many talented people who will lead it to even

greater success. hello, dear friends, this is a podcast of jokes, and today our guest is a magnificent, wonderful, my great friend, people's artist of the russian federation vladimir natanovich vinokur, glad to welcome you, uncle vov, i can call it that, yes, finally we met in this wonderful studios, we have everything imbued with such a new year's mood, well , first of all, happy new year and happy new year to you, and most importantly, you know, when i see jokes, what are jokes? anecdotes are taken from life, this is not intentionally made up, these are cases taken from life, yes, so today i propose that we combine business

with pleasure, yes, i will be useful, and you will be pleasant, that is, or and then let's change, then vice versa, yes, but i will try to remember some anecdotes, from you then cases from life that became anecdotes. but i won’t start with this, i would like uh, to ask uh, how much is the celebration and feeling of a holiday such as the new year , how much has it changed in the process , because you started celebrating new years earlier than i did, a little earlier, 40 years ago, but that’s not the point, and you know, i i’ll tell you honestly, for me the new year for a long, long time was a super family holiday, because on the new year... it was my mother’s birthday from the 31st to the first, hers was january 1st, we always celebrated her birthday, never, you you know what an artist is, i didn’t work in new year, my mother is no longer here, she left, she still didn’t

live long enough to see the steward, 96 left, mother, and i, according to tradition , still have a new year, new year i... i work in the family, it so happened that i was taught from childhood that this is a family holiday, especially since we now have a friend , fedya, he is 8 years old, he turned in december, so we always celebrate the new year together, he has a grandson i am a humorous person, i agree, the fact is that for me, when some kind of... artistic activity was just beginning, yes, of course, the most attractive fees were definitely offered on new year 's eve, but the price tag grew there, but i can say that i appreciated what you are talking about, for a long time i still choose

to spend new year's holiday with my family , that is, not to work, i understand that this happened to you, after all, there were temptations when, well, to work, well, for a lot of money, fees. of course, with departures, with flights both in moscow and the moscow region, i just remembered one such - like an anecdote, when a man was driving a car at a speed the inspector arrives, then stops us, where are we rushing at such speed, we violate, he says, old man, well, you understand me, i know , this corporate party was a little delayed, i missed the new year , i’m going to see my wife, he says, you’re not crazy , he says, it’s now the month of august , that’s why i’m in a hurry, here... there are a large number of new year’s jokes, and they range from such harmless children’s jokes to those that are strictly

for adults, i remember such a simple joke, a little boy comes from kindergarten , his whole face is scratched, that is well just like that as if some cats were tearing at him, and his parents say, what happened, vanechka, he says, in our kindergarten there is a big, fluffy christmas tree, and there are few children, but during a round dance... he got a little injured, i don’t remember artificial christmas trees, when they appeared on their own as phenomena, everyone put up a living christmas tree, they put everything up, and accordingly they threw it out there closer to may day , yes, of course, yes, there were whole technologies, some people threw sugar into the water, some fed, now there are all kinds of bait, but before that, they watered the christmas tree, yes there was a whole art, there was always a tradition in all houses, the longer you... keep the tree, the more happiness that this was my

case, i was born and raised in the city of kursk, and such an artist came to us for the new year holidays mark bernes, well, to the city , you can’t get any tickets, the neighbors were there before, well, like relatives, you know, the doors were open, they came in, that’s it, and i’m sitting by the christmas tree, well, this is after... the new year, i’m sorting out toys there, i’m 14 years old , i am a laureate of a regional competition, and i was sent to artek, by the way, in artek yuri gagarin presented you with a gold medal, here is the winner, here is the photograph that i snatched from the photographer, unfortunately, it is there, just for the song, for the song, do they want me?

i saw gagarin, this and that, suddenly a neighbor , the doorbell rings, i open it, he says: “valanka, come to me, there’s a surprise, i go in, i look, he’s sitting with marbernes, i’m stunned, i say, and he says, with the markushas studied together in kharkov at a technical school, this is my, as they say, friend since childhood, markusha, this same boy, my neighbor, laureate of the competition and region, he sang in artek, he is a singer, and mark

naumovich says, what did he sing? i say, do the russians want war? come on, do the russians want war, he says: why are you yelling, they don’t want war, what are you doing, well, look, the christmas tree is standing, it’s just new year, and you’re yelling? silence, i remembered this for the rest of my life, he was still “quiet, do the russians want war, you ask, he says, the old man, now your mutation will begin, your voice will change after 15 years, you shut up, don’t shout too much, you have to wait, to save my voice, and i'm in this all in good condition, which means you can’t sing, lest you lose your voice. and i remembered all this and suddenly i’m serving in the army and there was a concert at dynamo

on victory day, i see us backstage there, i’m in uniform, so i’m looking, mark bernes is sitting like that with a stick, can you imagine, i come up and tell marovich, decide to turn up and start yelling at last i’m asking why i’m saying, you know, i’m here... you have my neighbor isaaktivich, you studied with him in a technical school in kharkov, and i’m his neighbor, i sang to you whether the russians want war, but he says no... yelled, remembered, i swear you, and i’m so happy, i say, how are you , he says, better tell me, how are you, i say, i’m finishing my service at the theater institute, in the music department, i’ll sing, i’ll sing, and you, he says, and i’m in the other side, they brought me from the hospital, i will sing a new song, jaan frenkel, the cranes,

do you hear, he sang, the cranes came out... when i was studying at the institute, one of my friends did me a hack in the circus in the moscow circus, where in the program featured two clowns, yuri nikulin and mikhail shuidin, you were there for a long time in color, and on color for two seasons worked, seventy three, in short

, i get there, the program was called towards a dream, then you know, we even had circus events on the topic: construction of a kamaz, i went out singing a song, this is all due to us, according to fate, according to a dream, according to years, oh kamazel, so there, on this program, i became friends with a great man, this is yuri vladimirovich nikulin, who treated me like a father and joked and fooled me.

it will bite just a little bit, but don’t worry, that ’s it, let’s go, they’re taking me to the thunderous place, just like that with a finger , my nose is red, here, and i see, shuiden hat, and i’m sitting all wet, because i have a premonition that yes, it’s also a new year ’s program, about a kamaz, but a new year with a christmas tree, that’s it, i have to sit under the christmas tree for five years, suddenly i

see a screen opposite me like that in the mirror and... she’s shaking like that, what is it , it turns out, shuidin was sitting there, dying of laughter, but i worked for two seasons, yuri vladimirovich and i, he just called me a boy, when i became popular, he told me, remember, the program was , nikulin led, white parrot, white parrot, of course, he’s trying to continue, and he tells me, boy, you he deceived me, so... kabzon sang with us, kuba, my love, yosif also sang in the program, when he was still young. and you sang and sang and became a clown, you’re pissing me off. regarding

gifts, well, in soviet times. somehow everything was simpler, that’s what the children dreamed about, and they wrote a letter to santa claus, i ’m also with my kids now, that is , a soccer ball, well, i don’t know, there’s a camera there, well, that’s already it, that’s an expensive gift , i remember there was a game, i saw the guys driving, when you turn it on and a car was driving there, you had to get there, i mean that i haven’t even dreamed of it yet, so i wrote and wrote, all these letters went nowhere, like in the joke at the post office... workers sit, look, sort through the mail and the letter to santa claus, that is, well, they opened it, a boy writes there , there, hello, santa claus, i behaved this year. ok, i live in the north , it’s very cold here, i don’t go for walks, because i don’t have felt boots, mittens, a fur coat, or warm hats,

please, santa claus, please send me felt boots, mittens, a fur coat a warm hat, well, postal workers are like that, well tears, just brought to tears like that, let's chip in, everyone there, everyone who had how much, some rubles, some 20 kopecks, that is, well, in general, everyone got together and bought it. so the little girls bought a fur coat, a hat, a mitten, well, they just didn’t have enough money, well, they sealed it all there and, well, they sort of sent the boy there to this address, a year passes, so again they sort out the letters, they see the familiar handwriting there is five of santa claus , they open it and there is a letter from the same boy, there is santa claus, thank you very much for the gift for the new year, which i asked you, i really liked both the valechkas and...

valichki tolkunova offers to perform before the new year in taglyata and for this she will be allowed to pay on the spot to buy without waiting in line, that is, not to give a car as a gift, as it is now, yes, imagine, valichka agrees , valechka agrees and that means everything has been arranged for her car, and she needs to get home before the new year, she says: to her pianist, she says, igor yaich, let’s go straight today, she came off the stage, with a braid, with this one, she says, let me not

change my clothes, i’ll sit down and go, and igor yakovevich - it was her pianist, igor is cool, he just started working at the busconcert, a young guy, igor yakovich, yes, to igor, he says, yes, please, let’s go, they are going, they are going, that means valchika says, igor yakovich, if possible, well, the saint is already there, you’ll see the toilet , please stop, he says, no questions, valentin vasilyov, and he sees a village passing by, a courtyard, a wooden building, well, as usual, and he says, while no one is there, everyone is sleeping, that’s right there, she says, no problem, she went there, opened it, went in, at that time a man comes out onto the porch. in panties you know those shirts with a cigarette from a terrible hangover, i went to the toilet, suddenly the door opens and valechka comes out and says:

hello, thank you, i went and got into the car, igor, he says, i’m driving away, and i see like this in the mirror, the road is so snowy, and it’s standing dude in shorts and felt boots, about to be baptized. then you told an anecdote about this seisky toilet, when a neighbor comes out in the village , the neighbor is sitting, well, there in this toilet, sitting and the door is open, but he doesn’t have a door at all, he says listen, the bear says, he well, well, well, you idiots, at least you installed a door, but what can i take here, i’m just talking about these gifts. spoke, because now in our time, yes, that is, even children, when they write a letter to santa claus, they still write something very serious,

some game consoles, some tablets, and before somehow it was all simpler and we dreamed of something tangible and something like that, i just remember now, you know, a very interesting case, i had that... i’m still a young artist, suddenly muslim magamaev invites me to the united states on tour, he was traveling through the russian-speaking public from the state concert officially, which means he’s inviting me, and i’m going with muslim, you know, thanks to him i started singing, well here... do the russians want war, that’s all, i took it from the tv from muslim, well, yes , in short, we are touring with him, we have a day off

in the city, which is called a parodist first of all. that’s why, well, not primarily , including, that’s why you clearly filmed the entire performance, by the way, muslim did the parodies perfectly, and he wasn’t offended, i did a parody of him during a concert trip, and he did me i imagined very interesting shots, and in short, we had a day off, and there is a memorable photograph, muslim and i had this one, which means muslim, reigen, wife, this is, yeah. then i was the president, only i could , well, muslim is such an intelligent person , so refined, everything, so i could find it, only i was in an alley - find it for 5 dollars on a cardboard regen, my wife, and muslim and i stood up and took a photo, but you can’t imagine that when we returned to moscow, there was not a person who doubted that this

was real. why, because i i told, i say, well, such a story, yes , we were called, well, pre-new year's affairs, there to the embassy, ​​they asked for a reception in the white house , they asked, muslim sang, i sang along, my wife regina is here, although, she says, i say, a fan of muslim magamaev , can i take a picture with you, i say, stop, i say , she also invited her husband, brought her husband, so muslim always said, volodya, you will ever quarrel with my wife, she still sometimes asks what kind of things you have relationship with nancy? no, well, well, it was funny that it was like that there is a photograph, here are new year's concerts , this is still a separate topic, new year's lights, well, yes, well, yes, well, of course, we have

new year's songs, there is me too... i put on this fur coat and a beard and pretend, i know, what else did i remember at joseph davych’s, kabzon ’s anniversary, well, i decided to congratulate him, so i called, picked up the phone, well, a woman’s voice, i didn’t listen to something, i thought, nelya, wife, and i said, hello, yoch, please, she says: he’s on stage, he can’t come up. i say who is this? this is his assistant, lena. a lenochka heard you a lot. tell me that yulia veniamna medvedeva called. dmitry anatolyevich’s mother, and he was then president , there was a period where, when he was president, she suddenly said: yulia veniaminina, excuse me, here he comes from the stage, he comes up, i’ll give it to him and

says, “hello, joseph, yulia veniaminovna, for me it’s a great honor that you called me , a simple artist. joseph davidovich, this is a great honor for me, because i grew up with your songs, i love you very much, i have a huge request, let’s join you on the phone, sing my favorite song, and thinking o seconds from high. he says: i’ll kill a kursk , it’s necessary, of course, it’s very funny, it ’s necessary, it’s all confidential, can you imagine, who could afford that at all, that no, well, well, well, we were close friends, joseph called me son , he had three sons, razenbaum, leshchenko and me, and he was always joseph, the next one, when he had birthdays or

anniversaries, he says, well... bastard, whose voice will you call, and that is, he was always preparing , it’s like pranks now, they’re doing pranks, it wasn’t completely clear vavan and lexus yes, well, like all ordinary children, i went to music school at the age of 3, like all ordinary children, guess what, it’s a curved curve, i don’t understand what kind of ficula this is, it’s not a pigula at all, it’s a little car. you’re dancing energetically, a new direction of hip-hop, if anything, you can’t shake your hands off food, otherwise suddenly there are germs on your hands, of course, that is, they’re already ready-made, yes, we do it very well, we’re a real team with you , best of all, new season, look,

after the evening news: we were born in russia, came to china, learned chinese, say the phrase in chinese: beha is the best, tx! product of the stellar group , you will have two children, professor, and your career, by the way, is not the main thing for you, comrade dronova, business executive, she does not have sufficient qualifications, i am very sorry that this is how you... “i beg you very much, forgive me , please , i don’t want this kind of love, i want to live in myself, where did the french drug with silicone come from in your medical institution, if the drug is found, this is the end of everything, i

won’t leave it like this, the pictures are ready, i’m sorry for my mistakes, doctor preobrazhensky , new series, tomorrow after the program, you knew everything and kept silent in order to get the position of head physician, and how many jokes do you have with lev lechenko, well, of course, i remember all these famous stories about shoes, and i came to enroll in the theater institute at gitis , yes, i came for a consultation,

a guy came up to me and said: go ahead, i say , that’s right, i can listen from the admissions committee, but i haven’t watched this film, come tomorrow, and i followed him in the audience, i’m watching the girls . the guys are sitting, they brought a pianist, i sing to them, i tell them, i’m dancing, like for an exam, yes, he says , well, there is hope, tomorrow don’t be late for the exam, i’ll sit on the committee, i’ll support you , i’m coming to the exam, for some reason he’s not there, i think he’s probably late, but i the dean says, and you are a soldier, why didn’t you go to the consultation yesterday, they didn’t let you out of the unit? suddenly the door opens, he looks in, i say: here he is, as the dean yells, leshchenko, well, close the door on the other side, the graduate students became insolent, and i

remember, i realized that the graduate student, well, he was playing a prank on me, and i’m tormenting him for 55 years already , v this year will be 55 years old, a long story. leva and i have been friends for 55 years, but i played a prank on him. once there was a festival in germany, on the last day tomorrow we fly to moscow, we bought the same shoes, but he has forty-four, and i have forty-second, well, they’re the same concert, well, to perform, yes, yes, yes, and in the evening, well, tomorrow is the flight, i took him two left ones, put them in a box, and two right ones for myself, i think, well, fly to moscow, i admit. we’re flying on a plane with leva, can you imagine, well, it seems that the germans must be law-abiding people, i decided yesterday, i think, i’ll try on the shoes, put them on, both on my left

foot, one forty-one, the other forty-two, wow, it’s lucky that the store opposite was open, i went to exchange, they left the orchestra pit open and that means the conference announces a guitarist with a song there so-and-so and that means the guitarist comes out very quickly, and the compere has not yet had time to leave, and the guitarist comes out and there are rays of light and he doesn’t

notice and just goes, goes into the orchestra pit bang, falls in there, the compere sees this in his peripheral vision, returns and calmly, with the next number our program is announced. the next participant in the concert was a conference, alek pesarenko, a very famous conference in those years, there were a lot of group concerts, palaces. sports, stadiums, but you know, this is an extra opportunity to communicate with the greats, here i am a young artist, and next to me shulzhenko is singing, utesov is singing, i don’t know there, arkady raikin is performing, well, you can go crazy, well, there are young people there too, in short he comes out and does a parody number for me to come out, he says, now he sings for idiots and fools vladimir vinokur? i tell him, well, then i’m back, i say, listen

, i’ll end the concert for you, i don’t want to harm this action now, but he says: listen, but nothing, and lyova is standing next to him, announce him now, you hear, and he he says , but nothing, i’m going to announce to lev now, and leva listens, says, well , there’s no need to joke with me, i was involved in boxing, he says, and i’m there, well, maybe i’ll announce it like this?

how much were jokes valued there

before now in our current time, that is, well, this genre, well, let’s say, is mildly less popular than it was, yes, yes, but still, jokes are desirable, of course, even in concerts sometimes, well, i tell funny cases, but in principle, if a joke slips through, i told a joke, i once told you that when a man comes to to the doctor, he says, to the doctor, i have a terrible... two problems, let's take turns, the first, which one , the first is the doctor, i pester my wife all the time , i constantly pester my wife, then the secretary at work, then the canner, the nurse, well, doctor, i’m such a guy, i don’t know what to do about this, the doctor says, well, let’s calm it down, let's give the pills, everything will be fine, second , what's the problem, second, doctor, i'm such a liar, yes, and i... i remembered an anecdote when a guy,

well, drank a lot, the weather is good, the snow crunches in general, it's good for him, just like that the soul sings, then the elk comes at him, bang, knocks him down, he just gets up, the bear follows the moose, bang, knocks him down, what the hare is looking at him, he says, well, the hare i can stand it, this time he’s stubborn. bang, i’m still thinking head over heels, what’s wrong, here the voice is like this: man, you should move away from the carousel, cool, here you go such new year's stories related to some such oddities , i remember, i remembered - such a story, which means , in general, i have, uh, my wife olya, when she decorates the house, here's the wall there and the house, she puts in the background - films that there are christmas ones. all these mechanisms, how he did

it to protect the house from these wet ones, wet bandits, they were called there, and we at one time, that is, i was already in high school, we were so impressed by this one, let’s say , his inquisitive mind is like kulibin, doing all these things, what means my friend. slava ignatenko , my classmate, i came to his house, and he said: come in, i go into his room, then some kind of story begins to work, and a plasticine ball from some tube just hits my forehead like this, in the end there's something there. i fell somewhere, hung, how do you like it, how did it hit me in the forehead? i think, okay, that is, well, revenge is a dish that should be served cold, i think, okay, and that means i’m in such a mood on new year’s, it was just before the new year, and my parents are going to some concert and after that they go there to visit

our friends there - their friends, i understand that there will be no one at my house, and that means i say in advance, can fame come to visit me there? my parents say, well, of course , i think, now the time has come, and that means i’m at the entrance, and i lived in such a military town, from the gate to the house to this one with a cave pipe there, there was such a long path, and i mean i’ll come up with a system, which means this slavik will come in, and in short i ’m buried in snow, i buried a piece of this not linoleum, but what about the oilcloth on the scooter ? i took such an old one from the barn, laid it out, and it was incredibly slippery , covered it with snow, immediately made a system of ropes, tied a large jar on top like this from under the herring, vasya poured it there - grain, rice, when it falls, so that it would be poured on it, that is, well, there’s a ball in my forehead, i remember

this plasticine one, and that means, well, i’m waiting, but i still look out the window, i see that there are some silhouettes, that is, he’s walking, i think that he’s not alone or something, at that time ... that is, there are no parents it must have been my dad, my dad and mom , after the concert, before going to visit, they decided to change their clothes, not mine, which means they are still beautiful when everyone, oh, and dad, it means, dashingly opens the gate and goes first, it’s good that he walked in the first, and i just see how very much like he ’s filming this movie, alone at home, which means both legs fly away like that, he disappears from the frame, rice is falling on him, the air is pouring in, which means... such different curses, and i open the door just like that and his hat rolls on just like that track, that is, the whole set, and my first thought is, only this one didn’t break anything, so in the end i got it, i really got it, in fact, in general, never repeat it, this is a movie version, what you see in the movies , don’t, don’t repeat

it, yes, because it’s dangerous, by the way, i want to brag, by the way, to our viewers, you told me when you were on... our program has come to an end, friends, let’s thank everyone together again vladimir natanovich, our guest was vladimir natalevich vinokur, people's artist rsfsr, my great friend, which i am beyond happy about, but today funny stories of jokes, as they say, are good, you all have a good mood, watch the podcast jokes on

channel one, and if anyone didn’t have time, on the website of channel one 1tv.ru. happy new year, friends, happy new year. hello, evening news on channel one, andrey ukharev with you. we destroy enemy strongholds and ammunition depots. russian units are gradually improving their positions along the entire front line. and...