this will definitely remain, i still think it will remain for centuries to come, it won’t go anywhere, because it’s a classic, by the way, i personally don’t need music without guitars, without drums, without bass, without such a lively live presentation, it’s an orchestra to me, this is a different story, to be honest, we need to bring back the industry, when everyone lives with each other, exchanges and lives in the same community, in the same society, but in any case, everyone will return to the living, because people cannot live without the living, so sitting yes. that they sing to the accordion, to the accordion they’re taking it, they won’t come back, but they’ve already returned, but they’ve already returned, yes, yes, let’s do something to the accordion now at the end it will die, let’s say that it will be love gone, love never leaves the podcast, 20 years later, yes, it always here, and here are always the coolest musicians of the lead fog group, today visiting the podcast 20 years later.

when sadness comes to us, like black dreams, a gloomy haze begins to cloud our vision, don’t rush to argue with it, it will go away like... guests from the underground will return again, forever to the bottom of the soul, a tear is poured again the bitterness of losses, the sadness of unfulfilled hopes is tormented by the shadow of days gone by. i look for rapture in

dreams, there is your image, only you, only you, alone, but that is just a dream, the soul screams, forever, the soul screams forever, love is gone, we are left, sadness, love is gone and... everything cannot be returned, what a pity, but you wake up, open your eyes, but you wake up and the sadness is forever, the love is gone , we are left with the sadness, the love is gone into it. you can’t

return it like tejal, but you wake up, open your eyes, but you wake up and the sadness will go away, forever, love has gone, love has gone.

hello, dear tv viewers, you are watching the triggers lab podcast on the first channel with you its host tatyana krasnovskaya psychologist, psychotherapist sergei nasebyan, our guest today is alexandra, hello, hello, alexandra, tell me what ’s wrong with you, i buy everything, good start, so i buy everything.

will simply evict me from the house, that is, they need i have a feeling that soon all things will be a separate house in order for us to exist together, this bothers you or is already bothering your loved ones, this is where it begins problem, this has always bothered my loved ones, i’ve always been like this, that is, if my mother and i buy, say, one down jacket as a child, or they buy someone one down jacket, then i need three, i need... so that it’s like mine , like masha, like katya, like my sister, and also like olga dmitrievna has some kind of conditional, so i need everything, the problem is that i need everything, well, it’s great that your parents had such an opportunity, but what’s wrong, well,

cool, but i’d probably like to buy at least a second one instead of the fifteenth cream apartment, that is, to feel, well, that is, you begin to understand that this is unreasonable. that this is unreasonable, and i feel absolutely stupid when i start buying the same, identical things in a circle, that is, 15 gray jeans, conditionally, there are three identical skirts, the point is not that i just have these things no, i have a basic wardrobe as such, it’s put together, i’m starting to take philip kirkorov’s concert clothes, which i will never wear, they will forever remain hanging there with a label, well, maybe i’ll try them on twice more. i’ll look at myself in the mirror, i’ll go buy something new, which i’ll never wear either, yeah, that is, i’m fulfilling some of my need for a purchase, that’s all, i’m not getting better or worse, it just appears a new thing that then doesn’t

bring me any pleasure, what are you doing, i’m doing smm now, before that i was married, i didn’t work by education, i’m a lawyer, yeah. well, that is, it was during the period of toys, during the period when i lived with my parents, when i lived alone, when i then i lived there with my husband, this has always been the case, and my husband already told me as much as possible, but there was ever such a short period, maybe when you didn’t buy. no, never at all, never a day like this, okay, you go somewhere on vacation, it happens, travel, less often now, but let’s say you went somewhere on vacation, do you buy there too? yes, i buy a suitcase to bring what i have, but what are you buying there? well, let’s say, i used

to bring some cheeses from abroad, there wine, olives, even food, cosmetics, i really love all kinds of cosmetics, things, clothes, shoes. in principle, it doesn’t matter to me very much, but have you ever been to any such countries or places where you definitely don’t need everything that is sold there, well, for example, in cairo, no, i haven’t, they weren’t, yes, yeah, well, i’m just interested in what you brought from cairo, and how do you feel in general when that thing that you desperately wanted becomes yours, a seven-minute joy, that’s because i gave it to you i have it, look, you still have it.

lychee, i was waiting for her, i went and bought her, yesterday you went and bought her, yes, yeah, today i’m with her, today you went with her, okay, but tell me, at that moment when you saw her, what were your thoughts, feelings, emotions arose, i liked it, i thought that i needed it, that it would fit, that it was roomy, that i could carry a laptop in it, since all my other bags are very small, why haven’t i bought one for myself before? not a single large bag, and i don’t know why i went with little ones before, but now i needed it. that there was such a rationalization that everything would fit in this bag, a laptop, there are bricks and so on, but do you think there is a laptop there now, no, of course, it’s clear that it doesn’t, just tell me, this is rationalization, but what emotion arose when you saw her, well, i liked her, she was beautiful, it

seemed to me that she was comfortable, i understand that you liked her, so i like you too, but this does not mean that we are from here with we'll go home to me, no, you know, but i like you, but i somehow i’ll survive this, and maybe you will. well, i’m not for sale yet, but let’s see, you liked the bag, but besides the fact that you liked it, is there some other emotion there? which you know, maybe it looks like some kind of hole that needs to be closed, this bag will definitely close this hole, it seems as if, i actually thought that it was because, well, i kind of have desire, it’s wrong to say, like everyone else, to be the best, i guess that’s when i, well, that is, buy everything, everything i can, i feel like i'm better than i really am, maybe yeah. maybe this is it, that is, it turns out that without this bag i’m somehow not the same, who is no better than

everyone else, well, as if everyone has it and i need it too, well wait, obviously not everyone has this bag, not everyone , either some friend you saw it with, i don’t know, some actress you saw it with, or some girl you saw it with in an advertisement, well, yes, and but the absence of this bag makes you what, i don’t know, makes me without a bag. here you are without a bag, what is it, sasha? not fashionable, probably not stylish, that is, you seem to be lagging behind, yes, yeah, probably good, in this backwardness, what kind of feeling, what kind of emotions, sadness, unhappiness, perhaps, that is, it seems to me that if i’ll buy something, maybe it will make me happy, of course, but now i’m more interested in this feeling of unhappiness. yeah, what does it consist of? i don’t know, it’s hard for me to say about this,

because i’m basically a person who has everything, i have a wonderful family, i have wonderful parents, i am the only child, that is, they loved me very much, they were waiting for me, they were always waiting for me, even if we look at my childhood photographs, here, i can show you after the program, there we sit in kindergartens, all the children are like children, i, socks with ruffles, that means glasses on a chain, grandma made a bow, then grandma sewed some kind of jacket with flowers, and i’ve always been such a favorite, aroused admiration from everyone, so it seems to me that this is what i want perhaps now it’s not enough, the feeling that they didn’t evoke admiration, but the clothes, and how you they were lying, perhaps, and certainly they were, playing with this doll with you, they seemed to create in you this feeling that if you are the most beautifully dressed, dressed up, dressed up, i don’t know, and so on, right?

i remember, because my dad passed away, i was in my parents’ family, i grew up, my dad was sick in the fifth grade, at that time my parents were already divorced, well, that is, we talked, my mother is such a very calm person, she never told me ... oh, it’s hard to say, my dad is an anesthesiologist, yeah, my mother is

a financier by education, in my opinion, well, something connected with the financial and accounting field, when she was young, she worked part-time at a clinic, yeah, she was young, she met her dad there, yeah, so they got married, you were born, 10 years later, 10 years later they lived without children, without children, yes, yeah, you were born, how long did they live together? lived after that, oh, i don’t remember, to be honest, but i was quite, i was very young, yeah, how did you spend your childhood, how much time did you spend with your dad and how much with your mom, how is this thing, well, with your dad i spent less time, of course, most often on weekends, because my school and academic life was busy, that is, even, probably, my mother tried to implement some things that she may not have had, because as a child i never had anything... they refused when i asked, that is , at my school i studied from eight there,

let’s say until 3-4, or even five, we had a lesson format, and then there was an extended period, after which i attended music school, dancing, what - gymnastics, i don’t remember half of where i went, i just came and she said: “mommy, i want, my mother told me, please, go to dad, i came and said: daddy, i want, he says, go!” and dad, when they divorced, did he start his own family? no, it wasn’t created, that is, you remained the only child before your dad, yes, yes, but at the same time, when you came to your dad for the weekend, this is how he showed love for you, how you felt, why, by what criteria did you evaluate this? i remember dad very poorly, because i was very little, i remember the moment when he passed away, yeah, eh i even remember how they told me about this, and how painful and incomprehensible it was for me, but i remember my dad in segments, how he

picks me up from kindergarten, how we go to pizza with him in a restaurant, well, that is, in this format i as such spending time together. i don't remember, may i ask why they got divorced? yes, you can, it was, it was the nineties, such a rather difficult time, my dad worked in a hospital, worked in gynecology, in dentistry, then there were questions, well, how did everyone relax in the nineties, god forbid, well or not really, my mother wasn’t happy with this kind of life, and my mother wanted security to a greater extent for both me and... herself, well, considering i’m from a gangster city, yeah, from vladivostok, it’s so specific, my mother wanted a quiet life. you are watching the triggers podcast, with you its hosts tatyana krasnovskaya and sergey nasebyan. we are talking with sasha, who is our guest today, and we are talking about the problems of chapagalism. where is mom now,

in vladivostok? yes. yes. how is your relationship with your mother? excellent, wonderful. after all, the hourly difference there is 5 hours, with we communicate with our mother through instant messengers, we communicate with our mother via video calls, by phone, we correspond, yeah, did you have a close relationship with your mother, mm, in what way are you close, such a warm relationship, where you are with each other, where you trust each other, where, as a teenager, not really, now yes, in childhood, in childhood i don’t remember my mother well, actually, because my mother... worked a lot, i remember how my mother took me to school and how my mother picked me up from school, well that is , we didn’t spend any time together as such, we started spending this time, probably i already i was in grade six, seven, eight, when we developed a common hobby there in watching tv series, well, some of those , oh, let’s watch something there, well, let’s watch some tv series there in the evening

, oh, let’s go for a walk let's run, well, let's go for a walk, run, chat, well , chat, oh ma, what's your favorite, this one, let's read it together, but that was all later, that was later, it was already very strong, yes, and when you were very young, your mother had some kind of... then such an interesting, rich life, than did mom live? my mother lived by work, that is, although everyone always teased me that i was a child, beloved, deeply loved, my grandparents took care of me, i have a wonderful family, i have sisters and cousins ​​there, we all had a great time, had a great time.

then mom and dad divorced, as if yes, they could communicate normally, and mom never turned you against your father, but this does not mean at all that you did not suffer from this fact that they do not live together, of course, but with at the same time, as if all the main holes were closed by what you have everything was, yes, so that you seemed to have nothing to complain about, but there was no feeling that you were needed, and today, out of habit, you continue to cover up all your negative feelings with purchases. now, if you just look at the basis for which you are buying 117 cream, as you say, it’s the same, then in fact, in a few seconds, there are minutes, maybe before that you will see that the level of anxiety was so high that you we urgently need to do something to put an end to this alarm, but because in such circumstances as

you describe there, both vladivostok and the nineties, a gangster city and there are all these difficulties and vicissitudes, they are certainly you... a high degree of anxiety for you as an individual, you need to cover yourself with something, well , you know, it’s good that at least you don’t drink vodka, yes, it’s good that you’re shapogalism , but since you begin to understand that this is inadequate, then of course you need to look at it from the point of view of the fact of what emotions you are closing off, i will assume, for now i’ll drop it like this and we’ll move on, that these are exactly those the very feelings of anxiety and loneliness that arise inside you, yes it is possible. therefore, all these purchases do not bring pleasure, because it is the same as what happened in your childhood, they bought you a lot, you had a daily routine, a schedule, knitting, sewing, a club. from the photo , all this, but it was necessary, this warm contact was needed, yes, closeness, warmth, it seemed like it was not enough, do you know how to create

warm and close relationships, do you think i can, i actually have i also have this certain fixation, for me it has always been important to have a family dinner, a family going somewhere, to the theatre, to the cinema, there if i let my husband be a man of unknown status. today he said that well, let’s lie there in the evening, i said, what are you talking about, we should have a tradition, well , i always wanted this traditional, some kind of family fun, something like that, i don’t i know, it’s cool to sign some gift, write some text message, he ’s going on a business trip there, i write something for him on little pieces of paper, but i’m all about contact, about the fact that we important to each other.

from such a beautiful girl, why does a man leave, why does he leave, well, what difference does it make, even if you kick him out, but no, i’m not kicking him out, i left him, well, because i can’t live with such a little emotional person, he he’s ready to cover some basic needs for me there, but conditionally, well, he tells me, why are you complaining, you have everything, you have a house, you have everything there, what else do you need, but i need it. yes, so that it’s cool, fun, interesting, emotional, well, that is, i want something that i want buy something that can’t be bought, yeah, that

’s probably it, yeah, something that’s not for sale in the first place, yeah, that’s happiness, flight, yes, that is, not that, well, yes, there’s a husband, yes, good, yes , he’s doing something there, he goes to work, he’s great, when he goes to work, or left, it doesn’t matter how you felt, right? well, to be honest, especially the last five months, i was so happy, sometimes i didn’t even want him to come, that’s how it was, well, you were left alone, what did you feel at that moment, you were going there to meet friends, on a different note, not always, i spent a lot of time at home, we lived outside the city, i liked to walk, i liked to hear the birds singing, i planted some hydrangeas there, he always said that, i had... two unfortunate beds there 3 squares, i think, damn, plant onions there and hey, why are we going to buy these onions, i really wanted to create something, and i still want to, i

went to sew, i’m now trying to take photographs there, i want see exactly the result of your efforts, your business, now you are you do, now i’m doing it, yes, yeah, and you know, i feel so happy now, despite the fact that i continue to buy, look, it’s strange, it feels like this happiness doesn’t cover your inner pain some kind of internal hole of yours that closes precisely when consumed, yes, but now i did an experiment for myself, i left, went to a friend, left with two suitcases, in one a tablet, in the second, that means things, so i am now i also reassure you by what i buy necessary, because everything else is kind of there, i don’t want to return to it yet, i don’t plan. for now, well , not today, i just understand that i’m more comfortable alone, well, i feel much better alone, as if nothing was pressing me,

so what’s been pressing me lately? it seemed to me that he seemed, well, not that he didn’t seem to hear me, so he often asked the question, what are you missing, but i seemed to have enough of everything, i didn’t have enough time, attention, i didn’t have enough jokes, i didn't have enough. in the sense of such emptiness, emptiness, yes, and this is one of the, if before this we have had a difficult relationship for the past year, if before that i understood that we were still here.

let’s try it like this, let’s try it here, then behold, lately i’ve really felt emptiness, i understand that, in principle, i don’t need anything at all, let’s see, did you turn to specialists with this question for the first time or did you already go to, well, turned to a year ago, that i also cover up the emotion, the need there with shopping, but after talking with a psychologist i went out and called to a friend and said, listen, let’s go, there’s a new collection, we need to go in, let’s just go for a walk. that’s it, yeah, well, you can do this today after talking with us, but now there is still a feeling that you seem to be more ready to deal with this, yes , i’m tired, really, i want to, so i understand, which was also very significant for me, i was in thailand, it was many years ago, i was vacationing on one of the islands, and there are three islands, one of them has an airport, the other two, you can

get to the poromchiki. it just didn’t close, that is, there were two suitcases that you had to step on, some things from your suitcase, because in order to close it, and i have the next flight from the island to another country, i understand what i need buy something else in singapore, i understand that i simply won’t deliver things there, i started giving them to her and i...

what does she feel from this when, probably, this didn’t happen, she feels something like that some kind of gratitude, but i understand that a person really, and i laid out things for her, i understand that she only chose what she would wear, and damn it, i’ve been saving for years, saving for years, saving, saving, saving, there’s no joy, for me it was so very significant moment. okay, and these are, as it were , those parts of you that you are aware of, but the unconscious part still wants to go buy, let’s just try to figure out what else today, well , if we generally consider, in principle , your chapagalism, as behavior with attachment, yes addictive, then we need several elements are required, we definitely need several targets, one of

which is your professional activity, the second: an assistant, oh, before that i worked as an assistant in a large holding company, after that i became the executive director of a modeling agency, after that something went, went, well, i’ve already moved to moscow, and here i was, well, with my man in an uncertain status, i was finishing, finishing my higher professional education, since i was transferred from one place to another, i lost 2 years, these 2 i didn’t work for a year, and

it was extremely difficult for me without... work, because before that my life consisted of wonderful travel, i had a great time, it was interesting to communicate, to meet new people, i really regret that during this time i lost my professional skills, for example, such as knowledge of the english language, previously this allowed me to communicate with anyone, anywhere, at any time, now i understand, recently going into some kind of restaurant, when... i hear speaking english language, that i understand almost half of what they say, so i would very much like to return to the activity in which i lived, but let’s say now i understand that this is impossible, here i need to look for some other ways, but even, by the way, in fact, when i was working, i didn’t have such strong chapagalism, i bought something, when i worked with brands, i

didn’t buy anything at all. they gave me everything, well, look, because at this moment - you get satisfaction from professionalism, from your activities, this great, in a relationship, what can change? in a relationship with this man or with any other, i probably think that you need the next, the next, that is, well, relatively speaking, well, if we assume that your relationship, here you are dating a man, yes, as you are afraid or as you you are worried, worried about the fact that he will find out that you are a shopaholic, that’s how you hide this part, but i don’t hide this part in any way, but well, you have a problem, conditionally you admitted it, thank god.

from the fact that a person does not give you that the amount of attention that you want does not give the quality of attention that you want, of course you want to cover it up

with needs, things that you buy, and it’s not the things themselves that you need, it’s this ability or opportunity, power, to buy it that’s all, yes, that’s... what you’re looking for, and i would, well, how can i say, if i were you, i would still look at that very relationship with mom and dad, there in childhood, where there was still not enough their attention, it is obvious that the problem of this chapagalism takes its legs from there, you know, this work requires, in my opinion, or rather, this problem requires quite a long time of work, and group work is best, but i will now give you some... well, instructions, or something, yes, what needs to be done, i never suggest quitting smoking, drinking or to stop buying, for example, like that, it’s pointless to do that, you need to do the opposite in the opposite direction, in my opinion, that is, essentially, uh, you need to do two very simple things, first, you can

absolutely safely buy everything that costs less than 500 rubles . i don't know what it will be i don’t care, just no, i don’t, i understand your reaction, “i understand your reaction, but no, no, i understand your reaction, but believe me, the whole of russia is watching us now, i just don’t need it, i know you don’t you don’t need anything, that’s the point.” you don’t need anything, you already understood this too, i’m giving you a direct instruction, your task is to buy something every day that costs less than 500 rubles. it could be anything, go down to the subway, there are absolutely a lot of absolutely unnecessary things sold there in the passages, you know how much there is costs not 500 rubles. well, no, if you try, you will find something for , after all, there are stores, everything is 349 or something like that, no, i understand everything, don’t go for 500 rubles, let it be 1. rubles, but your task find.

the second thing i’ll suggest you do, i don’t know whether you’ll do it or not, at some point you’re sitting at home and out of boredom you’re scrolling through some kind of marketplace, probably yes often , yes, sometimes i’m riding in a taxi something like that, no question, suddenly your gaze stops at something that seems to you right now you need to, right now you need to, before you click on the buy button, pay, you first do the following, you hug yourself tightly... and tell yourself several times

that you love yourself very much and that you are the best on earth in general and that no one exists on this earth except you, so you say this to yourself several times, after that, if you want to do it, then you buy, but i have a feeling, especially judging by your reaction, that this will be more than enough, thank you big, you know, a previous psychologist told me about... a technique, i think it was called 21 days or something like that, that if you like a thing, you photograph it, and if after a month you haven’t changed your mind about buying it, then you you go buy it, i tried it, it didn’t suit me much, well, that’s why i suggest you do two things, i’ll try to just buy something completely unnecessary on a daily basis, you can immediately throw it away if you want, or you can put the box away there will be some unnecessary things, but the second one is yes to someone, but the second one is for... the tasks are more important, i really hope, than you

are leaving, sasha? it was probably important to hear that i love myself too, that i probably don’t need someone who will love me, that i’m no longer a 3-year-old girl who needs to go for a cotton candy walk with her dad in the park with her mom to choose shoes, self-love can be shown not only through shopping, i hope this will be useful to you, thank you for your openness, thank you. well, you watched the triggers podcast on channel one with you were its presenters tatyana krasnovskaya and sergey nasebyan, we talked with alexandra about what the roots of chapagalism are, and that often the desire to buy things just covers our unbearable pain of loneliness. and if suddenly, dear tv viewers, you want to sort out your problem or solve some issue here in the studio with us, you can. application form for participation

in our program, which you will find on the website 1tv.ru. you can watch all episodes of the triggers podcast on the first channel website 1tv.ru. hello, on the air of the sunday time program, in the studio of ekaterina andreeva, we will talk about the main events of the day of the outgoing week. an entire entrance was destroyed, the result of a direct hit from a ukrainian missile. does anyone hear? call! tragedy in

belgorod, latest data. let's move the front, for victory, quickly! how did our defenders take berdych, say the hero of the operation? and the berdychi themselves, well, nothing, they held out because of the swamp while we waited. we passed it, in ukraine men dress in women's clothes so as not to be sent to slaughter, honor responsibilities.

there is something to answer. we will not allow anyone to threaten us. our strategic forces are always on alert. and we will demonstrate the readiness of such people in exercises. the russian leadership will take all measures necessary to ensure russia's security, whether someone in washington likes it or not. europe does not like the prospect of a direct clash with russia. victory will be ours. heroes of the special operation among the participants of the may 9 parade on red square. we bow to your resilience and sacrifice,

dedication. all of russia is with you. no one is forgotten. immortal regiment campaign in new formats. near the bezzhemyan village at the bezzhemyan height, and today it’s 80 years since crimea was completely liberated from the nazis, a snowstorm in may, tulips, and so much snow, what happened to the weather, it turns out that there are two such two whirlwinds, ukraine, a terrorist state, today once again targeted the peaceful neighborhoods of belgorod with missiles. an entire entrance has been created in a ten-story residential building. according to the latest data

from the ministry of emergency situations, eight people were killed, 20 injured, including children. a one and a half month old child with burns and injuries. they are preparing to be sent to a moscow clinic. the city's missile sirens go off all day long. rescuers are risking their lives, they continue to clear the rubble, there may be more people there. the militants attacked at 11:40 am, a day off; many were at home at that time. the goal of ukrainian terrorists is obviously to take revenge on civilians for their defeat at the front, to kill as many people as possible. the presidential press secretary said vladimir putin received reports from the acting minister for emergency situations alexander's situations. occurred at the very base of the house, the entrance, the explosion was caught on cctv cameras, the one that took the blow could not withstand it, all 10 floors collapsed instantly, these are the very first

frames from the scene of the tragedy, a man presses his most precious thing to his chest, a child, someone is trying call my family, almost all the dust has settled. there were 40 apartments in this entrance, the struggle for people’s lives began from the very first minutes, fire rescuers, the national guard, doctors, and, of course, ordinary people arrived at the scene, there was no panic, they coordinated quickly, someone someone rushed into the rubble to clear the way for heavy equipment. at the same time , the evacuation of the house was taking place, first of all the neighboring entrances, inna, a resident of the second, the third collapsed, tore everything up, all the glass flew out, the half-window frames where you were at that moment, the corridor, but the husband, the husband did not have time for the bedroom, well...