i succeeded, i left, well, grandma always said such things, where i was born, it fit there, well, there’s a fairly well-known expression, when i left, she told me that you’ll come back in rags, yeah, you’ll come back anyway and you’ll sit on our necks and so on and so forth, it’s better to sit and don’t go anywhere, but you proved the opposite, proved the opposite, but the confession is not... no, well, you did it like - as if on the contrary, not the way she wanted, well, from the opposite yes, so why admit it to her if she wanted you came back in rags, and you didn’t come back in rags, why do you expect that she should, that is, she should admit that she was wrong, well, well, yes, but i would like her to admit that she was wrong, why, she, why is this necessary, she

well, look, let’s say your grandmother is there, now she’s 60 plus, yes, 70 p, well, 70. well, they added 10 years to her, subtracted, or rather, well, she’s sitting there looking, saying: what’s wrong with you? only 30, then at 45 you’ll come back in rags, you’ll be 45, he’ll say, you know, how life will twist you after 50, you will cry and come back with your tail between your legs, well, that is, yes, she will always have this idea that she will still be right anyway, but for some reason you want them to admit that you not only succeeded, but that they were also wrong, well , the dependence is probably public recognition, on public opinion, well, let’s go straight from their opinion, yes, that’s how it was formed, why did you suddenly decide to play this game, like i’ll prove it to everyone , it seems to me that these are some very children’s stories, what, when, well, i remember now the period when i made some attempts, i really didn’t succeed, and the adults said, well, you see, we said, well, it’s not

worth trying, and apparently, anyway, such a rebellious nature took over, and i decided that... then to prove to someone, in fact i understand that they don’t care, but i feel very bad about it, and i suffer from the fact that i don’t receive the recognition that i expected, that having left for moscow, well, in the end there 10 years have already passed since...

to show someone something, to show that you have a good, good life, a good business, a good husband, although there is a demand for honesty and to be honest, but it feels like people don’t want you to be honest, and you showed a beautiful picture of your life, how you drive a cool car, and you don’t have any worries at all, and what kind of people don’t want that. these are some friends, nevertheless, i want to understand, this is what i should do next in this life, because i already have some kind of business, but i want something more, i want some kind of greater realization, well , i probably want something - maybe you can prove to yourself that well, i can, you have a good the car, well, it suits me, well, i mean, you have a good car, i do, but why are you answering me in a way that suits you, there are better cars, of course. but i didn’t ask this

question: do you have the best car, lyuba? you have a good car, a good car, yes, but mine is better, how do you feel? curiosity, what else? interest, compare, but exactly, what difference does it make to you what kind of car i have? well, you said that yours is better than mine, i said, i just said, now i’m interested, but let’s say you satisfy your interest, it turns out that it’s really better that then the next time you and i meet, i ’ll have... be prepared, look, it turns out that some kind of emotion is born there, it’s very similar to anger, yes, let’s assume that same anger is exactly there it would just have the opposite effect if my car is worse, really, well, like, now, but pay attention to the fact that i asked you the question, is your car good, the answer is very simple, good, bad, you tell me, i’m happy with this way, wanting... well

, how to stop - my dialogue with you in comparative categories. by the way, can you tell me where you are from? where are you from? you moved to moscow from kazakhstan, from kazakhstan, from almaat or smaller, from almaat, let’s, okay, let’s agree that you have a pretty good car, i’ll probably be right if i assume that your car, well better than the car of 80 percent of almaty residents, this is a fact, a fact, here they are meeting you, everyone has gathered together, all these residents of this city are at a crossroads by chance, here you are. they know you, everyone knows you, where are you from, what you are dirt, here you are like a prince, yes, your feelings, i feel sorry for them, but why do i feel sorry for them, they look at you, someone is jealous, someone is happy, well, you want to possibly let someone down, yeah, well so normal,

but probably this is the ego that right here, i’m a beauty, well, there is this feeling, that is, it’s a pity for them in an arrogant sense. but in any case, pay attention, a whole range of feelings and emotions appears, although it would seem, why would they be there, why, uh-huh, well, for what, it’s like, well, it’s not necessary, but i have an assumption that these feelings, they seem to protect you. but what if a person, one of these people, asks you: lyuba, how did you buy this car? well, otherwise i would say that this is a very interesting question, and the story is very fascinating, by the way, and you told this story, to be honest, not yet, i wouldn’t tell it, because this is generally a story of

great faith, when there you have 100,000 rubles, you’re like, yes, i’ll buy myself this car, it doesn’t matter that it costs 3.5 million, and you do it. yeah, well, this is the story, but it ’s still as if, pay attention, but in this there seems to be no history - your progressive steps, which you can say for sure, look, first, it means i saved up 100,000 rubles, this was enough for, i don’t know, the down payment, let’s assume, yes, then i thought that i i will be paying the loan for this car for 7 years, and for this i realized that i need to increase my income, and for this i opened another kindergarten, when i realized that this was not enough, i realized that i needed to open a third kindergarten. well, that is, and you would tell the system directly, the fact is that the impostor complex often arises in people who cannot explain their success, but it seems to me that i am lucky, it’s true, i have this story, that well, i just have magical thinking, so i count affirmations in the morning, although i to be honest,

i have doubts about affirmations when they are not accompanied by actions, naturally, because when they are not actions, they do not work, at one time i was generally very skeptical about this. in fact, i’m an opera singer, well, i ’ll convince you that i’m an opera singer, where does the impostor complex come from, i will have an impostor complex, if suddenly someone believes me, they will tell me to sing, when i go on stage, probably at this moment i have, i’m not going to sing, i ’m just telling you that i’m an opera singer or a conductor, it doesn’t matter yes, so no, if you

have an impostor complex, this is a good sign that tells you that you are not an impostor, that’s interesting, can i ask you a question, this is a little from another opera, you said that ... that you have a good relationship with your husband, so in 8 years you managed build a good relationship with your husband, yes, while being business partners in any project, that is, if you are asked now about how this is done, how you did it, you have an algorithm, a clear understandable algorithm, what you did to be honest, i’m listening to you now, i understand that i really need to digitize my knowledge, digitize some of my successes in order to. confirm that it is really deserved, exactly so, because i remember there was a period in kindergarten when there really was no money pay wages, i had a chain that was given to me, and i pawned it in a pawnshop in order to somehow cover

my obligations to employees, and of course, when you remember these stories, you think, well, how would i do certain things so that today, firstly... this business scales, so that in general it functions in some way, well , brings benefit to people, and at least, however, i’m probably narrowing it down too much, but this is the concept . i'm lucky, my husband is great, and i don't even understand there may not be a very good relationship, yes,

that is, i have no idea, understanding of some kind of algorithm, that is, where you sometimes need to remain silent, yes, but these were objectively such moments when you make some wise decision, which subsequently it helps to save, for example, a marriage, so that’s what you need to figure out, yeah, you have, let’s call it bluntly, yes cases, you have such successful cases that. the second part i wanted to say, the first is about the fact that impostors do not have

an impostor complex, the second simple thing, which i said, two things need to be remembered, the second is just how you yourself came to this, digitize your experience, well, relatively speaking, yes, digitize, so if they wake you up tomorrow night and ask you, like, how did you become who you are there became, let’s say, yes there, why do you live in moscow and not in almaty, why do you live like this and not like this, there is a very important point there, that even in childhood. tomorrow if they ask you how to open a business, here, here’s the first thing you need to say, you have to be prepared to

disagree with where you are, yeah, no under what circumstances do you disagree with the fact that you earn there, i don’t know, so much money, and not 10 times more, let’s assume, yes, or that you drive such and such a car, and not a better one, and so on and so on, and this is the first step, this will always be the first, even now, when you talk about how you want to scale your business, or you want to create yourself as a businesswoman who will be there... everyone knows in the magazines , on the pages of all sorts of famous ones, so to speak, to shine, that anyway you will have to disagree here now with that, where you are, yes, but the question is, do you really not want to be where in what you live in now, do you really not like it, do you want to be on glossy covers because your grandmother or because it’s yours desire, here i have just such a... completely different paths emerge, because we

have now moved into a house and it’s so cool for me, but it’s so far from moscow, and i understand that in order to be on the move, you need to be here, because there is a certain atmosphere, a certain rhythm, but i feel so good there good, and i’m like that, i even called it a safe haven, so i just feel good, and i want the opposite, i now have a desire. lesson, i won’t be able to, so i’m probably here today in order to really understand

the truth of my desire, whether i really want to go where i’m telling everyone what i want, so let’s imagine that you, relatively speaking, already there, you don’t even need to tell me where, well, you have more money there, the business is larger and so on, the car there is somehow the best, the house and so on further and so on. and now imagine that along the path that, well, during the path that you are going through, well, it so happened that all the people who are important people for you today, grandmother, mother,

you will achieve everything, but this is such a secret, no one yes, which, in which you are so shady, this is a shady success, yes, you will do something, you will, let's say, you will need to sign a contract, will never know what car you drive, no one will ever know how much you earn , no one will know what you're worth at the head of this business, well, this can happen, if you still find it interesting, then it’s definitely yours, then you’ll be ready to move mountains for it. but if there is still some classmate standing there who should see her fall from envy, then with a high degree of probability you will not impress her, because she will always devalue your experience, your result, and most importantly, you will not receive this prize, you won't be happy there because there

will never be enough there, and yes, i can't say that it's very interesting for me, interesting exactly. personality, media, fame, here, here, these are the concepts, well , okay, this can also be in brazil or there in north korea, you will be the most famous northern somewhere, no, maybe in italy, but only you there no one will know, except, well, i mean, the italians will know you, my children will know, my husband, then this is for the children and husband, well, yes, why do you want to show it to them, well, that’s the same phrase, to be proud of me? so that the children would sit and watch, oh, mom and there they show, this one is not valued at all, not valued at all, not valued, just imagine, i still believe in this illusion that they will value it, that it will somehow inspire them, go forward, motivate them, look, this does not mean , that you don’t have to do this, yeah,

you just have to understand that these people will never appreciate it. you know, it seems to me that this will be at least an important awareness for me after today’s meeting with you, that about the impostor syndrome, just in general, i never thought about the fact that an impostor, he doesn’t feel that he an impostor, and about the fact that if you expect some kind of assessment or approval from someone, then you definitely won’t get it, just get used to the idea that you will never get anything from these people, you will be so stupid. a situation when you will bet your whole life on this conditional classmate seeing this, someday fainting, and she either won’t see or won’t fall, and you’ll just end up with the feeling that you lived your life for someone -that? you know, i remember, for example, myself in childhood, when i studied at school, some

students came to our teachers there, well there, who graduated from school 10 years ago. and these are some guys, yes, there are conditionally 12, and he is 22, he came from the army there in a conditional uniform, i then dreamed of being a naval sailor, and of course i imagined that one day i would also come to my home school, that means in uniform, of course , necessarily a captain of the first rank, and how beautiful it would be in full dress uniform with a dagger and all the business, life turned out completely differently, firstly, i’m not a sailor, secondly, i can’t come to my school, thirdly, these teachers are no longer there, right? mm, but this is the feeling that i will definitely be my steps there along the school corridor, when some guy comes in, it will be me, to whom i am proving something, i won’t be there at that moment in class, there will be some other children sitting there who will look at me and say who this is, maybe, of course, they will somehow admire it, but it won’t do any good, that’s when you suddenly realize that the goals, which

you set yourself, they should simply be interesting to you, they should inspire you, and... they should be truly yours, because they should realize your values, yes, for example, inspiration - this means that you know for the sake of why are you going to do this, well, for example, i will create a big business in order to be able to help people in my hometown, suppose i open a kindergarten there, which will be completely there, i don’t know, free, accessible, with a french twist , with a mathematical bent, it doesn’t matter, but i’m i’ll do it, i’m doing it in order to implement this. for what, yes, that is, what will happen, even if you are gone and no one knows that you did it, well , apparently that’s why i don’t have this yet, because i don’t understand what. success is a bonus that no one will appreciate, no one needs it except us, everything is there, there, full stop, once many years ago a

girl came to me, whom i had known for a long time, she came to me for a session, and i asked how are you doing, she says bad, i say, listen, so i saw you recently on a social network, yes, i say, everything is fine with you there, she says, and you saw someone who is doing poorly there, that’s for... for me then it turned out to be consciousness, i suddenly i realized that it’s true, this is such a vanity fair, where everyone shows that supposedly everything is fine, here in front of me sits a man for whom everything is bad, but on this social network he tells everyone how to build relationships, for example, with men there , let’s assume, and before that i had never thought about the fact that all these social networks are needed for in order to speculate, this is also possible, well, this must be clearly understood, i sell there with the help of these social networks, then what do i...

great, then i ask accordingly, where are the people who earn as much as you want? earn? well, suppose this person says: well, they hang out there in expensive restaurants, i say, okay, go to a couple of such expensive restaurants, then you come and tell me how you felt, yeah, yeah, well, it happens in different ways, i myself too, as it were i did this once, then a person comes and says, listen, there was something i didn’t like there, and what i didn’t like, but well... i didn’t like it, because everything there, everyone is kind of pompous, everyone there is kind - they’re arrogant, everyone there is kind of, i’m like that, you don’t like the people you

strive for, well, it turns out like this, well , it seemed to you that they were pompous, but it kind of means you don’t like them, but how will you turn out to be the same person, it turns out you already don’t like yourself in everything about this, and for me this very important mental material that needs to be worked with, because a person must first accept that they will say about him: you will not come there, you need to look at these people only for this, in order to discover within yourself these beliefs that you may not be allowed there, but i

wrote some time ago, i even had a video of some kind of content, about the fact that when we want to be, it’s now fashionable to say, from point a to point b, we faith in point b is not enough for one simple reason reason: i, the one in whom i believe here, now, today, here i am sergey, there is such and such, such and such, yes, i don’t believe that i can be the way i will be there at this point b. i don’t believe in this money, i don’t believe in success, i don’t believe in myself, which may be there, and this is also a very difficult job, so if you look at someone only to see how you you will look through the eyes of people who have never been there, yeah, this is important, you can track your reactions, yes, because these are the reactions will stop you, well, i think that... they stop me to some extent , that well, it turns out that everything is going over the heads, or as they once told me, why do i

say that now i have diametrically different paths it’s in my head what to choose and what, and such a split occurs, because one day it really hurt me, they told me that i was like a man, and it became wildly unpleasant for me, but... i’m thinking about it right now about the fact that maybe it really is there in the big business, yes, relatively speaking, that’s where i want to go, it’s like this, that is, these are not women, in fact, they have more masculine energy than feminine energy, then why do i want to go there if i’m offended by the fact that i’m here that’s what they called it, it feels like you don’t need to get somewhere there, but... on the contrary, go back and figure out who you really are, and what this race is for, for what prize, yeah, and to whom will you bring this prize , you carried it.

you will be fine with him, that’s the answer, well, probably, for me it’s the other way around, now after grandmothers who don’t appreciate it, leave it with you, talking to you, i have a feeling that here i am now, after 8 years in business, on the contrary, i want to be a mother, for some reason, to be that mother who takes care of her children, well, at the same time, i can’t say that this can be very strong. some kind of implementation, but maybe to make it easier, somehow reset some internal ballast, which greatly interferes with movement, well, it turns out that everything is through some kind of constant resistance, but you also have to understand that you are a mother they need their children are up to 12 years old, i just understand this moment, that now my son is seven, my daughter is five, but at the age of 12 they will tell me,

mom, close the door, come out. and this moment really really scares me, it’s not that it scares me, i’m just thinking about the fact that i actually have very little time left, that is, i had 7 years that i didn’t use, now, well, how i used it, but not as effective as i would like, yes, but it’s important that there is also a trap here so that you don’t knock on their door when they come to you they will say it, they didn’t say it, i ’ve put so many years on you here, but i gave it to you, it’s worth doing just for the sake of it. with your spouse, your business partner, that for these 7 years you perform there 80% maternal function, 20% business partner function, then this can change if you want, and maybe you will give birth to a third by then, no one knows, i ’m just wondering why you said this, you can read it in my eyes, because i just, with my eldest son

, it seems to me that i... let some kind of this enjoyment, probably, of motherhood, because i didn’t really enjoy it, honestly, i think, why at all, why, well, i was 22 years old, and i’m kind of like a business kid here, all this somehow at the same time, in the end, here now i want a third one in order to enjoy it, with each subsequent child there will be more pleasure, of course, that’s for sure, but still, you know, even... this needs to be done, as tatyana rightly said, you need to do it for yourself in this sense, then you will find a balance, then there really will be a balance, i know successful women who have children, probably to some extent they missed some things in their motherhood, perhaps their children, how to say, will have something to talk about with a psychotherapist, but even if you give up everything and sit at home, your children will still have something to talk about with a therapist. in

this sense, on them, but the fact that you can agree with your spouse and find this very balance, perhaps then you can really tell people about how you came to this balance, this will be very valuable, i thank you very much behind today's meeting for a conversation, and there are a lot of, let's say in a fashionable word, insights that you really want to directly note down somewhere in a prominent place, so as not to forget, this is very important. review the algorithm for yourself, write it down, directly, yes, thank you, i think it was an interesting conversation. you watched the lab triggers podcast, its hosts were psychologist tatyana krasnovskaya, psychotherapist sergei nasebyan, our guest was love. yes, and we talked today about how to find a balance between the desire to achieve success, raising children, the role of a mother, a roleplayer, it seems to me that there are a lot of

interesting things. we found in this conversation that it will certainly be useful for the viewers, if you want to become a participant in our program and ask questions about you, then you can fill out a form on the website of the first channel 1tv.ru. hello, the sunday time program is on air, in the studio of ekaterina andreeva, we will talk about the main events of the day of the outgoing week. st. petersburg international economic forum is ianas. from february 1 2025 and thereafter annually pension. will

be promoted not only for those who have already retired, but also for those who continue to work, about the world in a friendly and not so friendly way, there is no need to create... the image of an enemy from russia, you are only harming yourself with this, with this, do you understand? the main statement of the president. close combat, another bird. our defenders are pushing back the enemy in all directions, the police are already fleeing from ukraine so that they won’t be mobilized like this.

americans are the only country, the united states, that has used nuclear weapons and the same diagnosis in normandy, where they celebrated the 80th anniversary of the opening of the second front. and how does the state support farmers? ida pushkin, i remember a wonderful moment, before me i was like a fleeting vision, like a genius

of pure beauty, a poet and a prophet, it’s new for us to argue with europe, or the russian has recovered from victories, as russia and the world celebrated the 225th birthday great classic. the main event of the week is the st. petersburg international economic forum and vladimir putin’s keynote speech at the plenary session. world entered an era of dramatic change. and russia accepts these challenges. despite western sanctions, our country remains a key participant in world trade and is actively developing. the president touched on the main achievements and set goals for the future. and, of course, one of the main topics is strategic security in the world , the west’s attempts to shake it up using ukraine. details from konstantin panyushkin. 2.5 hours have passed since the beginning of the plenary session of the st. petersburg economic forum, when the moderator, scientific director of the faculty

world economy and world politics of the higher school of economics sergei karaganov, started a conversation on the most pressing topic of the entire discussion with the president without accelerating movement along the ladder of nuclear escalation, stop in the near future. if it doesn't work out, who else will do it besides you? regarding nuclear escalation, we never started this rhetoric, i no longer remember the name of this lady, the former prime minister of great britain, who, when asked when she stopped, the prime minister, said that she was ready to press the nuclear button, we so no they said never, that’s how it all started, we simply answered that yes, we need to take this more seriously, we immediately started talking about the fact that...

i forgot about sodom and gomorrah, so maybe we’ll remember about this rain and try to get back together again part of humanity that has lost faith in god has lost its mind, without me, maybe you will set the heat there, they are already

scared, but if you still rely on the existing nuclear doctrine, any logic is possible, but if god forbid... it leads before any blows, then everyone should understand that russia has a sprm system, an early warning system for missile attacks, the united states does, but europe does not have a developed system. in this sense, they are more or less defenseless. the second important fact about the russian nuclear shield is its power. our tactical nuclear weapons are three to four times more powerful than the bombs the americans used against kheroshima and nagasaki, three to four times. finally, the number of warheads is essential. we have many times more of them on the european continent, and even if the americans bring theirs from the usa.

second, of course, these same europeans will have to think, if those with whom we exchange such blows do not exist, whether the americans will get involved in this exchange of blows already at the level of strategic weapons or not, i very much doubt it, and the europeans should also think about think about it, that’s for sure, but the most important thing is that i still proceed from the fact that it will never come to this, we don’t have such a need, there’s not even a need. think about this topic, please, and i would also ask everyone, superfluous

just don't mention such things. the guests left the plenary session hall impressed by this statement by vladimir putin. putin said it will not be used, and it is not even worth mentioning. this is very encouraging. he said no one should talk lightly about nuclear weapons because they... it appears that the public discussion of the prospect of nuclear strikes on stage at russia's main economic forum was an attempt by the kremlin to calm tensions at a time when the war in ukraine is escalating, entering a phase which and russian american diplomats call it the most dangerous during the entire conflict. russia will win in ukraine, and will do it without the use of nuclear weapons. vladimir putin has no doubts. his strategic plan, i...

is directly proportional to the losses, understanding

my responsibility, i still proceed from what the general staff, the ministry of defense proposes, speed is important, but even more important is concern for the lives and health of our guys, who they are fighting at the front, you cannot compare the attitude towards a soldier on the other side of the front, against the backdrop of wild losses, the armed forces are seizing men on the streets and delivering forces to the front line, people in kiev... they have set conditions for continued support by reducing this level of mobilization by age, 25-23 years old at 20 years old, 18, or maybe ukrainian sources, that the americans will be immediately 18, meanwhile in russia in 2023 more than 3,000 russians voluntarily signed a contract with... this year.