authenticity trumping perfection ironically, lesson harnessed by his main detract or the 45th president who took an aggressive brand of filter free politics all the way to the white house. i could stand in the middle of fifth avenue and shoot somebody and i wouldn't lose any voters. >> okay. it's like i still occasionally talk to mark who declined to participate in this documentary. i think because of how guilty he feels about what this all did to his four sons. he says he's working hard on those relationships and maybe i'm a fool, but i believe them scandals the capitate people scandals take people completely out the game and mark sanford, that didn't happen tomorrow mark didn't get impeached. he finished his term and he actually won another race for the united states congress by being honest to himself, being honest to his conservative political values, and being

honest with the public the real mark sanford was able to shake the perfection of the past and start building a new story. even if it took him a long walk along the appalachian trail to get there being from philadelphia, i have an inherent distrust of anything that comes from new jersey. although i do acknowledge that the garden state punches way above its weight when it comes to political scandals in 2004, the democratic governor of new jersey, jim agree be stepped into a press room just like this and became an overnight sensation when he admitted to a gay a fair and resigned in the same speech the governor coming out of the closet was genuinely shocking. a career killer at that time. looking back though, i can't help but feel that we

were also quick to embrace the headline that we may have forgotten to dig a little deeper because the reason why jim agreement resigned is a lot more complicated than we remember new jersey america's communal jacuzzi or cesspool, depending on who you ask a land with its own unique culture and customs and a political landscape that can be rather, shall we say? in your face, you're done. it's 430. you've maximized your tan, get off the beach jersey is rough-and-tumbl e place, man. >> you know, it's not for the faint of heart the politics, the money than preska, the immediate scrutiny are all larger. >> i teach new jersey politics

and things say that to people, they laugh at you and they think, oh, that's going to be a fun gores about corruption. yes. new jersey has reputation for corruption being baked into the political process with some political operatives of the belief that if you don't get your hands dirty, you probably don't want it enough. so when a fresh-faced, squeaky, clean kid from jersey city, new, jim agree the one the governor's office, it seemed too good to be true. >> so help me god but this was jersey so get what's no sooner was he sworn in and rumors started to circulate about the shady things he had done to get there now for governor, we always had a perception that jim aggrieved. he was unable to say no to certain powerful political allies you have to, make some deals with the devil's to get the party line

party nomination and the greedy from my vantage point, was more than willing to do it. >> what against didn't agree these rise in jersey, there were whispers that the devil in question was the real estate tycoon charlie kushner? yes. of those kush nurse, there is speculation that kush nor emigre we had a quid pro quo relationship that cushioning was going to become his biggest developer. and he wanted certain things from return trailing kushner and the kushner family started to pour huge amounts of money into his campaign. these are the kinds of ways that oligarchs like charlie kushner develop their power and then there were rivers, them aggrieved, get hired unqualified friends for key administration roles we're allegations of corruption, extortion, and nepotism in his administration rumors of favor trading, backroom deals and a campaign finance fraud investigation from us attorney chris christie were all

swirling around to the grieving when one hot august de into thousand four, he called a press conference, but instead of talking about any of that, he dropped this bombshell. >> and so my truth is that i am a gay american he was gay and having an affair with a man and he was resigning with headlines like v's who cares about government corruption tonight, a stunning admission from new jersey governor james magee the twice married father of two, admitted today, he had an extramarital affair with another man. it was shocking. >> everything about it was shocking. >> and i remember one of the senior your reporters at the paper. she lets out just this instinctive response of a gas like murray, these coming out might not seem gasp worthy today, but keep in mind 2004 was a very different time. i'm in the most prominent gay people that many americans knew were fictional characters on a tv show portrayed by actors who

themselves were not openly gay so pop culture in the media latched onto the gay jokes with the maturity of a 13-year-old, hopped up on pixie sticks. >> and we sort of guiso foot. okay yale, he had an affair. every married guys got some action on the side in this case in the behind it was an inexcusable in excuse me chapter titles in jim during his book, politicians who have two bad taste in my right now but here's the thing. there was such a fervor around the grevy's coming out that the story of all the political corruption surrounding him got lost i'm agreed. he said he felt forced to resign because he was gay. that i think is wrong and i think that the people who pushed that story-line either don't know the story or don't wanna know the story. >> people were digging into it and all that digging stopped when he resigned not for that,

but for being gay. >> while jim denies it to this day, is it possible that he didn't resign to escape the public circus around his sexuality, but to escape an avalanche of other corruption allegations headed his way but the benefit, of a little hindsight, jim agreed he has emerged as someone both aware of and open about how he justified a series of disastrous political choices, and how his overpowering ambition led him down a path of public and personal deception it seemed almost destined to implode governor. thanks so much for doing that subledger. so your story is so interesting because you were living a ally, the secret life how did you justify this to yourself? was this just well, this is what gay men have to do. and i just have to pretend to be something else and lots of other gay men are in politics pretending like they didn't wake up and say, i'm going to be deceptive for

the sake of deceiving. i'm going to create this whole double ledger no i didn't make that decision prior to giving the turiel campaign. i made it. i get seven or 8-years-old i can remember this as if it were yesterday. i go to my local public library and i'm pulling out the card catalog, look up the word homosexuality it said underneath see psychiatric illness and it was just like this thing, at least then in america called gay, wasn't a good thing i realized at that point in time that life is going to be a very painful trajectory. if i own this and you just try to make an accommodation outbid an unhealthy accommodation. but the irony is, in politics it was actually a useful tool. well, because so much of the american political persona is to craft a narrative, jim married his first wife, carrie scholtz in 1991, and began to

craft the false narrative that he knew would help him look the part for the role he really wanted to play. you're perceived as straight male on top of the food chain. it's a bad actually reconfirms and an unhealthy way the rightness of the decision jim agreed he was very young, aggressive politician and wanted to be governor for a long time. >> he taught to join this town law school. who is a bright guy and he also was very ambitious guy and he was kind of a back slopping kind of guy. you want it to be light. he wanted you to like them i think jim clearly wanted to be governor and would do anything to get that job part of it was because i believe in the promise of america, i believe this is great experiment known as american democracy. and i think i can work well with people so

much of it, it's also fueled by a ego and self. but i knew that these were at that time to mutually exclusive narratives ambition, and being gang. >> yep that could not co-exist. >> checkoff has this theory about a gun, the check ofs and gun. if you introduce a gun in the first act of the plates, going to go off by the third? yep was that gun you're homosexuality, you're being gay, or was it your ambition? >> is both was the intersection of these two inextricable forces than some point in time. >> the tragedy comes to a head hey, mom, how many should i decorate it have ran have blue that's a really tough call. >> who you. >> that's john king from cnn let's look at the data. your county leaned read, eye 15 points in the last presidential election. however, looking at the latest polling you're going to the loss of those purple

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will still be more to making this dalian. i could be making the membrane won't we yeah start clicking i get some more coffee so the governor will have some coffee to sitting across from jim grieving now, he seems like an affable easygoing guy. >> and that's exactly the political persona he cultivated to succeed in the cutthroat arena of jersey politics. by the time he ran for governor, he had been closeted for most of his life. >> everyone has some level of accommodation and for me, i want to run for governor. so you make this decision to be like, what it is that america says is the right thing to do so you can flourish power in new jersey is who becomes governor? >> the race for governor

between incumbent republican christine whitman and a little little-known democratic state senator, jim my grieving because he was so little known and not independently wealthy. my grieving had to rely on his work ethic to get his name he didn't stop and called them the energizer bunny. >> he just kept going and going. >> governor's races tighter than ever. >> but work ethic could only take him so far. he lost his first race it's for governor by a narrow margin. i would like to graduate our governor, christine todd whitman, for a reelection victory you lost to governor christine todd whitman very narrowly. 27,000 votes? yes. not not that i remember, no. 27,000 votes. i actually remember where i was. i would tell us whether i was walking along the frasier river and i thought to myself, well what do i do and there was a moment like, i can break out of this, but i had been too deeply

shaped by my own history to that point, change the narrative do jim dug deeper into his leinz after his first marriage ended rather than arouse suspicion as a bachelor, he pursued his family man image by marrying dina matos and unsuspecting picture perfect political life. >> before long she was pregnant and he was running for governor again i declare my candidate for governor, of the great state of your charges jim was clearly the democratic front water and front runner gets you the county line. it gets you scares off your opponents money front runner gets money enter real estate tycoon and democratic megadonor, charles kushner charlie kushner is the father of former white house advisor, jared kushner and a major. the jersey real estate developer it became clear to

charlie, people with the power to make things happen were democrats. and that he himself could be a kingmaker charlie was like, get it done, guy so that was an authentic connection that you had with him? >> yeah. definitely would add. and he helped support you. he write it's expensive to run statewide in new jersey. you it's like a $40 rates. oh, yeah. yes. >> the gravy needed someone like kushner to bankroll. so christner donated huge sums of money. the jim's campaign at the same time, there are benefits to having a governor in your back pocket for someone like kushner having a close relationship who can grease all sorts of wheels such as contracts, zoning approvals, and tax abatement that is yours. he could to power. so charlie kushner gave over half $1 million to my grevy's campaign efforts. >> there is a word that can help you out with many ethical

issues when it comes to money that word is no. >> gloucester didn't just open his pocketbook for jim. agree me. charlie would fund educational trips to israel like the trip where my greedy met the man for whom he risks everything you wanted to israel on a trip? yep and in reshow let's see, own you met go on cfl? yes i'm traveling throughout israel and this young person is sitting across from me and he begins dissect my campaign. >> he knows your ranks, he knows the race as well as i do with arguably better insights good looking and he's articulate, was in an instant attraction yeah and then he joined you when you big e corresponded during the quarter course of the campaign. this is not an intellectual decision, this is not a head decision. this is a hard decision meanwhile, you've been married, dina thousand yep. >> you're running for governor in 2001? yep. all this time,

goal on is making hours. but i think you also saw this as an for tuning in an opportunity to get involved in politics. so how cognizant were you that bringing golan somehow from israel to new jersey to be on your staff? was setting yourself up for what happened it's a great question i sincerely don't know the answer. >> you don't know? i don't know the answer go on sub-l was eager to come to new jersey to join my grebes campaign, but needed papers to work legally, which would cost jim another favor from charles kushner, who had the businesses to sponsor the work visa. >> now, with all their fates tied together my grevy's epel and kushner set out to win the new jersey governor's race at any cost? >> jim, a gravy, the democratic candidate, has been able to spend $1.7 million. so far, jemaah gravy has spent about 20

million. i got to figure we would say how many fundraisers we need to do. i'll be there. we have had eight years of failed leadership. i'll speak. you'll pay, i'll collect. it was a well oiled machine at everybody was working under the impression that this was the gravy train that was coming into station gym. agree. lee will be the new governor of new jersey but fundamentally as i said in this campaign, i'm a jersey guy in november 2001, jim agreement he was elected governor and suddenly the whole world was watching his every move because just two months earlier, the largest terrorist attack in us history had occurred right nearby he okay. city isn't shown on america. is under siege with terrified new jersey residents watching the horror of 911 from across the hudson. people were asking,

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demanding that public officials keep them safe city is now working on a detailed proposal outlined what they think would work the gravy lacked experience on the subject, so he needed to hire someone as a national security advisor. >> he also had a seek to fill on the new york, new jersey port authority board, which would decide what to do with ground zero so whom did he pick for these roles? his lover, golan pell, and his friend and benefactor, charles kushner. let's take those too bad decisions one at a time when was it that you actually became? intimate with golan i don't get bit diary i'm surprised at jim agreed he didn't remember the date because according to his autobiography, it was one night when his wife was in the hospital recovering from the birth of their daughter so the timing of this is interesting you win election in november

2001 you and golan had your first actual moment as lovers. in december 2001 and then a few weeks after your sworn in talking to reporters, you mentioned him, yet publicly yeah in february 2002 at a meeting with the press defending new hires and homeland security magritte, he said we will not skimp on security and he added that goal on sub-l was, quote, a security adviser from the israeli play defense forces, probably the best in the world, not probably. they do the best in the world you still think he was qualified for that job for wasn't home by the way. i can no homeland security of i was a counselor to you and one of the things that was in his portfolio, but their homeland security adviser at 20 years and the fbi. but i mean, so there's something about being in israeli that does give somebody yeah. but trudy been in today. he had at all been in

that portfolio of answer's no. clearly and unequivocally, you brought them up, you brought them up and then meeting you didn't bring up the fbi again? yep. yep. you brought up go along. yeah. i wasn't i wasn't with the fbi guy did you want to be outed? >> did you want to be discovered? >> yeah. you it's probably a mix or components or factors as that decision-making not to purchase psychiatry without a license? since but that's some level. i was doing something there. now, these are great psych i've got to get a therapist if they're having an interview with jake tapper? i don't know. i mean, like part of it was being in the closet or as they say in aa, we're only as sick as are secrets. it was clearly not and it's due political act. i mean, it was the next day what happened all these reporters is like cruz's skype, why? is there an israeli on the new jersey payroll withdrew all legitimate questions faithful was a man my greedy brought to be his six-figure security adviser under a cloud of controversy

alon did not have anything on his resume that would suggest a qualification for this job. >> and then given the fact that he was israeli national here on a work visa, was not going to qualify for security clearance. remember, it's four months since 911 to this homeland security after the biggest terrorist attack on us soil in history, people are like, wow yeah, it's crazy when we all didn't know was jim gravy hired his boyfriend to a position his boyfriend was not qualified for there was a lot of coverage while you were governor of what was called a new jersey, the pay to play? yep. >> give money to somebody. and i'm running for office and then you can get on a lucrative board so charles kushner, you put him on the port authority board is the golden crammed milligram. it's the economic engine you would argue for the

region as well, don't necessarily understand this, but the port authority is new jersey and new york, and it controls all sorts of decisions having to do with travel is two bridges. or roads, network, ships coming in, every development, who gets those contracts? it's incredibly loose yeah, i do have experience with development approvals business. >> this is the job that charlie krishna wants to be the head of the port authority when the whole world is focused on this piece of property, jemaah gravy has consistently denied the kushner lobbied him for the port authority position, but in 2002, journalists drawn mar sicko reported a different store jim lied, gemfile didn't lie. well, who is looked at as a quid pro quo for questioners, political contributions. and i would story about how charlie kushner had lobbied hard for this job few days later, i got a call from one of my grevy's operatives said, ron, i want to set the record straight. tony kushner did not lobby for that

charm charlie cushion who demanded that job. ron determining what's an illegal quid pro quo versus just shady politics can honestly be difficult but what's clear is that kushner bank rolled my grevy's campaign people were right to be concerned about any potential conflict of interest. >> and when the new jersey state senate summoned charles kushner to explain himself he backed down instead almost nobody noticed except for this guy us attorney chris christie, after looking more closely at why questioner might have turned down the plum gig in order to not have to testify. chris christie discovered that not only did kushner funnel as suspicious amount of money to my grevy's campaign the way he had donated to certain campaigns was illegal if you are corrupting our political system, this office will bring you to justice charlie kushner violated fundamental principles

of political giving he would give money in the names of other people if you are jim a gravy and you want money, this is a very beneficial practice because it wasn't just the money that he could give, but the money that he could mobilize on someone's behalf that made him particularly attractive to people running for office he also secretly used partnership funds for political contributions. >> and when his siblings, including brother murray kushner found out that their money was being used to fund politicians without their consent. they started cooperating with chris christie if you choose to violate the law you will be caught. you will be prosecuted charlie kushner gets wind of what's happening he thinks what is going on is my sister and my brother are conspiring against you and i need to shut them up. he decides to find a sex worker true proposition. charlie christian, his brother-in-law and get it on videotape and

decides that he's going to send the video tape to his sister that's right. charles kushner tried to get his siblings to back out of testifying against him by blackmailing his brother-in-law, his sister's husband, with a sex tape featuring a sex worker that charlie cushion or had hired only in new jersey and they now have a new charge witness intimidation every incredulous news report about the scandal included that in addition to being that kind of guy, charles kushner was also governor mud grevy's biggest donor it was the kind of attention but grieving really wanted to avoid especially considering the skeletons in his closet and the one on his payroll july 21st, a special how would happen when it lattice olympic celebration that turned deadly. >> the fbi searched for answers and while the wrong places that are being remembered as a hero,

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ice, 242424 i'm kevin liptak the white house this is cnn the gravy was in full retreat across years criminal campaign donations kept mug rabies name in the papers, and the governor realized he needed to clean up his act so we ended his sexual relationship with golan sub-l and terminated his contract. >> but it was too little too late in that world of new jersey politics. there were some chatter about that there was a relationship between chapelle and mcgrady that this point we know jim agree b game go on some paella job and enabled him to get a visa he

was certainly on the radar of the house reporters and he will covering it nothing about the rumors of alcohol lawn are provable. >> and principle obviously, their relationship was strange and newsroom immigrate his autobiography, he writes, quote after press questions about his qualifications reached critical mass golan had taken to calling me day and night to ask for his job back the longer i stood listening to my former lover, the closer my world came to implode it you told him, you would walk away from all of it to be with him? yep. what did he say? no because he wanted to be with the governor right? yeah. that's what i believe he didn't want to be with jim, agree. yeah. yeah. my grieving kept helping supple with employment and other favors, perhaps trying to keep him quiet but? in. the spring of 2004, go lawns appel threatened the governor that he would go public with claims he had been sexually assaulted by my

grieving coming? into the summer of 2000 for there winds up being an unbelievable tidal wave of scandal that's crashing down on the degree av administration. and in fact, it's hard to find the right metaphor. was it a circus? agree these top fundraiser under investigation for among other things, violating campaign contribution laws, was it a carnival? >> breathe? he was being undone by nasty rumors of soap opera proportions. >> was it a merry-go-round forecasters predicted that things would get worse for the governor. it was every single day thing to say going can you feel optimistic thank you he's running from reporters. he wouldn't come out for public events. >> are you got to leave early. we thought at this point the? public perception of jim agreed he had transformed from picture perfect young governor to just another messy, corrupt new jersey politico as the tensions

built, remember that loaded check offs, gun of political ambition and closeted identity i mentioned earlier well, that gun was about to go off in that moment. >> ma gravy arrived at a fork and wrote and he had to in a sense, pick his scandals. what was going to bring him down charles kushner and corruption or the boyfriend he accused you of sexual assault? yeah and they wanted $50 million, but they would settle for five. >> yeah. exactly. i remember my attorney. he says i've got good news and bad news. i could use some goodness already came by down 95% bad news. he still wants five. thank you. >> did you think that you were going to be able to weather the storm? now, continue with your career? >> no, i didn't it was a hot august day and i was sitting in the newsroom, i w. >> nyse, where i was working. and i get a call or when the afternoon testing testing 12

andrews are running into rooms i mean, there's flanks of cameras parents were there, dina was there hardest, the most honest speak, tried every give it in my lives obviously, i would have preferred to do it in a more low key subtle way. everybody, was gathered around the televisions in the newsroom. >> good afternoon. >> hundreds of people. it was so quiet, gear pin drop, and my grevy's says the now famous line, my truth is that i am a gay american so he got there on that stage with his wife standing next to him, giving him what is the most amazing like four minutes aside, i've ever seen shamefully i engaged in adult consensual affair with another man there was no way that that marriage was going to survive. so i am decided the right course of action is to

resign to facilitate a responsible transition of my parents were there dina was there and i really appreciated that the and it was man. yeah, judah right. to be mad, furious that she was mad because she felt humiliated. >> yeah. >> and she had a right to i was wrong. >> it's important not only the recognize the damage for myself, but the damage to people that i loved the grieving, a father of two said he had grappled with his identity for years was forced into what he called an acceptable reality. >> the national conversation can't, we let the guy be gay? he's married shore, but he was forced in the closet by an american puritanism. this country we're still making it very hard for gay people to live out their lives honestly, still, there is a sense of something unsaid in this discussion and my grevy's words hint at something more. >> it just seemed hard to believe and it seemed hard to believe that jim or groovy was going to resign in an office that he spent his whole life

trying to get by falling on his sword for the gay thing, there was no longer a real reason to pursue investigations. he was on his way out anyway. so what's the point of digging into his association with charles kushner? that all kind of went away. >> thank you. >> what would the american public with its puritanical streak and it's obsessive interest in people's sex lives rather, think about this degree av made the right choice as to which scandal was going to bring him down at that moment i love milwaukee, cnn is lie from milwaukee as republican tonight behind their nominee, his vp, and their plan to take that the white house follow cnn complete coverage, the republican national convention starts monday, july 15th today, and cnn whether you're moving across town or across the country? you can count on pods to deliver when we say we will,

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victims and their families. if you are loved, one has been diagnosed with mesothelioma. carlos. now back in 2004, i was surprised that the news media treated mug grevy's coming out like it was a big foot citing. >> but in retrospect, this was really the beginning of mainstream news organizations covering gay issues as anything other than a political liability. that was the year that that happened to you and it was also the year that it became a national issue? yeah gay marriage was the wedge issue. that president bush was using to win reelection yeah, marriage is the most fundamental institution of civilization and it should not be redefined by activist judges 2004, everybody was anti gay marriage. >> we grieve. he was anti gay marriage. barack obama was anti gay marriage, a man and a woman. when they get married are performing something. and before god 2004, when agrees is

moving up, it would have been impossible to support gay marriage. and so i don't hold that against him necessarily. i'm not apologize in but his desire to be seen as is sympathetic, tragic case that this had all had been done to him as opposed to the choices he had made and things he had done to others. maybe i'm just too catholic for that shut my truth is that i am a gay american and i am blessed, ready said my truth is i'm a gay american and immediately framed everything that would come after the resignation in that line, it set the tone it was a spectacularly well conceded evd pr strategy. >> apparently maghreb, you things he left office as punishment for his homosexuality. >> this is nonsense. if anything, his admission of sexual preference, one more support whole taken after the announcement? gives the governor his highest job approval ratings in two years you said it was living a double

life all these years. >> now you can be free. >> you end up telling the truth about who you are to one of the fixer's? yeah. and his responses, that's perfect. that'll really sell and i thought an aggrieved you in that moment, wrapping himself in the rainbow flag he had no right to he'd known he was gay forever. why was he telling us now? because he had to he tried to make it seem like he was being forced out because he was gay when that wasn't the case at all? it's being forced out because he had put a lover on a state payroll in a position of security just months after 911. he had been so reckless so unbelievably stupid. gym was forced to resign because he realized his position was untenable i'm honestly torn on this on a personal level. >> i know american politics, dan and in too many places in

the u.s now makes it tough for lgbtq americans to be who they are but as a journalist, i also know so much of what politicians do is calculated and contrived and spin. the speech of agriba gave on national television was spent just like his entire marriage had been spin. and he made his wife play an unwitting role in both meuser first reaction confusion i didn't even know up to a half-hour before my husband went on television, what he was going to say. so i was really in a state of shock even though goldwein said bell never actually took my gravy to court, the damage had been done in the gravy was out of office one could only imagine that he finished the week thinking the worst was over, but charlie kushner said, and i'm paraphrasing here hold my beer

the spectacle of a political career derailed by a secret double life wasn't all that new jersey is resigning. governor had to confront. >> there were some awkward stories for him and for new jersey this morning, she em agree if he resigns as governor and five days later, charlie kushner pleads guilty to campaign finance violation, tax fraud, and trying to entrap his brother-in-law to have sex with a sex worker to intimidate his sister it is a remarkable consequences moments. jersey governor really just can't seem to shake the scandal. his biggest campaign contributor ties in federal court, billionaire real estate magnate charles questioner, one month after charges were brought against mr. kirschner, he has pled guilty. >> trolley kushner. eventually pleads guilty to 16 counts of tax fraud, witness tampering, and lying about campaign donations he sentenced to two years. that was the end of charlie questioners influence over the new jersey governor. >> and with the engine of his political machine behind bars

and the tabloids feasting on his private life. you would think that jemaah gravy was done for but this jersey boy wasn't finished just yet. >> that quote unquote, downfall only eyes of the world profoundly changed my life. there's a transformative experience you cross that a business and you're in a different place. >> you're ready? yeah. i can wait. >> somebody asks you, what are you to do glasgow sometimes i do say american imagine sat in these roles, know what they say. safety. third i'm a disabled person just like you're not a person with black nets i'm not trying to be confrontational. we didn't write it i'm trying to be conversational introducing new advil targeted relief. the only topical pain reliever with four powerful paint fighting ingredients that start working on contact to target tough pain

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the republican national convention starts monday, july 15th, date on cnn like this.

thomas of old i have asked god to create a me a clean heart three months after he announced that he is gay and resigning agree. >> these spoke of being a changed man. and so today i still have a dream. thank you i'll never forget the day after i resigned before that has governor is 14,000 calls, texts, calls the phone goes dead. >> you can hear the birds in politics. it's boom. the day after your irrelevant. but it was the beginning of god willing crossing the best beginning to rebuild the life that's authentic and an honest, it's so charles kushner, what happened with him and his family was sad. >> i mean, it's a friend and he's been just been nothing but supportive, very quietly. >> or i can do is reflect on

myself. but your you're in a very from place in the second half of life was jim agree at a politician who dove clear-eyed into the mok, who traded favors and influence with unsavory folks to make his way to the top sure. >> was his resignation of public relations masterclass and skirting responsibility for, among other things, putting a lover on payroll absolutely. but i think at the end of the day, more than anything, jim agreed he was a guy who flat out wanted out of the persona he had created for him south. and this meant not only coming out of the closet, but out of the thunderdome of politics and ambition that had consumed him for decades. and by saying, i am a gay man darken at that podium the gravy finally escaped to prisons of his own making at what would seem to be the lowest moment of

your political and personal life it's like the moment that you become free. yeah it's is you break through the artifice and being closeted is just is a very toxic place. >> in the void that remained after my grevy's resignation. dina filed for divorce and jemaah gravy without his wife began to quietly carve out a new life for himself i've never had that happened on however long of a journey it took i'm very proud to be a gay american. thank you a lot changed in the ten years after musgrave, who resigned in 2015, the u.s. >> supreme court legalized same-sex marriage in all 50 states. and the gravy who had a decade prior of opposed gay

marriage was now one of its leading advocates, being gay isn't an option. it isn't matter, it isn't a discretion. it is who and what i am do you think if you had been born 20 years later? >> oh, my life would have been so different. i just, you know, just you would have been out of the class. i would have been out of the club, wouldn't have married carey, you wouldn't exactly hi, glad i would've been in a healthy relationship if i could rewind the tape, if i was brutally courageous, i would've said this is who i am i happened to be a gay american and i'm not here because go on to pell is suing me on sexual harassment. i'm here because i know who i am. if i could go back in time. that's the speech i would have wanted to have made, but i didn't have the purge or the wherewithal to make that speech. at an earlier point in time. so i made it at the last possible second when i when i had to make it, jim o'grady probably would've been

a even better governor if he was able to be themselves it's terrible thing to out someone krever really set in motion a set of circumstances that wound up outing mccready, he outed himself, but sometimes to be outed against your will is the best thing that ever happened to you in retrospect, the moment before it's terrifying, the moment it happens, it's oddly freeing and liberating that downfall was actually a path to grace. >> the thing that i was most afraid of the thing that was most afraid of was i embraced a place of total radical acceptance ultimately, you have the rest of your life to live authentically and god willing, virtuously and to do good things. and every single day, i'm working with attics and working with people coming out of prison. i'm working with combat veterans. >> it's behind these prison walls it's where former new jersey governor jim agree has found a new calling counseling inmates and working with them to prepare for life outside of jail. i guess i just wonder like do you want to show the

world? >> the change i believe in a god of second chances and can cross this threshold and get to a healthy place because i'm here with you, i'm arm-in-arm. i'm not going where so this story has a happy ending. this story has a great end. yeah jim agree these post scandal life has been a lesson in walking. >> the walk, he is a model example of a politician turning a political downfall into an opportunity for reinvention so it seems like we agreed he has learned a lesson but have we when he resigned, we focused on the gay affair, not the corruption allegations. and that obsession with sex scandals, with the private lives of our politicians over the public good or over the harm they can cause. that is still alive and kicking and when the next scandal arrives the hot take might not be the right one