dude. unbelievable. all right, my friends, i have to say goodbye now because i'm off to washington with my running mate. [ cheers and applause ] [ engine turns over ] [ engine revs ] buckle up, buckaroo! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> announcer: from the most trusted journalists at comedy central... it's america's only source for news. this is "the daily show" with your host, desi lydic! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪

>> desi: welcome to "the daily show!" i'm desi lydic. we've got a great show for you tonight. we watched trump's town hall so you don't have to. biden's impeachment just got impeached. and we made michael kosta go to duluth! so let's jump right into it with our ongoing coverage of "indecision 2024." ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] let's kick things off with poor donald trump. this week alone, he was fined $355 million. [cheers and applause] historians voted him the worst president of all time. [cheers and applause] and "madame web" turned out to be too bad to even jerk off to. real setback for him. so last night, trump took his ego to the day spa, also known as fox news, where he sat down

with laura ingraham, who came cosplaying as a purse. and she asked trump one of the big questions on everyone's mind. >> what qualities are you looking for in your vice presidential pick? >> well, always, the first quality has to be somebody that you think will be a good president. a lot of people are talking about that gentleman right over there. tim scott, he has been much better for me than he was for himself. i watched his campaign and he doesn't like talking about himself, but boy, does he talk about trump. [audience reacts] >> desi: i'm sure he talks about him to his therapist! god, that was so humiliating. trump basically said, you're only useful when you talk about how wonderful i am. and tim just had to sit there and smile! i mean, who knew trump also liked to grab 'em by the balls?

[laughter and applause] so okay, donald trump, tell us why he'd be a good vice president, and make it even more humiliating! >> the one thing that always surprises me is that the vp choice has absolutely no impact. it's whoever the president is, it just seems. >> desi: always remember, tim: no one can not matter quite like you can't. now get out there and show the world nothing! now one thing trump did have going for him was that it seemed like joe biden would be going into the general election facing an impeachment over his son's business dealings. and if you've been watching fox news, you would know that the case against biden was a slam dunk thanks to one of the gop's star witnesses. just listen to fox news anchor and human polo shirt, jesse watters. >> the highly credible fbi informant says that the burisma executive who allegedly bribed joe biden has audio recordings of joe and of hunter.

one of the fbi's top informants, a guy with impeccable credentials, a great track record. the highly credible, multilingual, extremely trustworthy, longtime, confidential fbi informant. >> desi: wow. highly credible, extremely trustworthy, multilingual, proficient at excel, a good tipper, a generous lover, always puts the seat down. this guy is rock solid. bulletproof. impeachment case closed! >> in a new court filing, federal prosecutors allege one of the fbi's own longtime informants spun bogus tales about president biden and his son hunter after meeting with russian intelligence officials. >> alexander smirnov was arrested wednesday charged with lying about financial ties between the president, his son and ukrainian energy company burisma allegations that have been central to the republicans' impeachment push. >> desi: yeah.

not only was this guy lying about joe biden getting bribes, the fbi says he was also working with russian intelligence! yeah, russia! again! can we please just get a new storyline? just once i want to hear that, like, bhutan is meddling in our elections, just to mix things up! didn't we just find out aliens are real? maybe they want to get in on this. so the impeachment case against biden just took a big hit -- although, it wasn't that strong to begin with. it's like saying when jimmy carter entered hospice, he blew his chances of making the nba. so now that prosecutors say this guy is a liar working with russian intelligence, surely jesse, a responsible journalist, is taking it upon himself to apologize and make the necessary corrections. >> everyone who blows the whistle on the biden syndicate or is connected to it has been arrested. what does that tell you? joe biden is a smooth operator.

informants, business partners, whistle-blowers. they are all paying a price, but the biden family has never paid a price. you got to hand it to the big guy. he's getting away with it. >> desi: that was an interesting way to say, "i'm sorry, i made a mistake." i personally would not have responded to this by accusing biden of arresting his enemies, but hey, every news outlet has different standards! some issue corrections. jesse issues an all-caps facebook comment. that's the beauty of free speech. you can say whatever you want out of your big, dumb mouth! for some political analysis of these accusations, we turn to our very own jordan klepper. [cheers and applause] jordan, does jesse watters

really expect us to believe that joe biden is a criminal mastermind? >> absolutely, desi. if you watch fox news, they make a simple, compelling argument: joe biden is a diabolical scheme machine with the tyrannical heart of a 50-foot joseph stalin. he is a master conductor, playing america's justice department like he's bradley cooper in "maestro," but without the problematic nose. >> desi: i'm sorry, but isn't fox news also constantly painting the picture of joe biden as a doddering old man? >> well, yes, because he's also that, too! if you watch fox news, you understand that joe biden is unable to form a complete sentence or stay up past 3:00 p.m. he spends his days shuffling around the white house in an open bathrobe, mumbling half-thoughts to his own shriveled genitalia. >> desi: sorry, but he's a mastermind? >> oh, a mastermind, desi! with a strong, smooth penis.

a mastermind the likes of which the world has never seen! rest assured, he is the author of all the miseries of the world. ukraine, gaza, the border, inflation, that thing where you bite your cheek and then keep biting that same spot! argh! this goddamn biden crime family got me again! >> desi: jordan, please help me put these two narratives together. what does a day in the life of joe biden look like? >> oh, you'd be lucky if sleepy joe gets out of bed before 10:00 am. then, it's straight to the masterminding! he spends the morning shaking down ukrainian energy companies and cooking crack for his son. until lunch: a small portion of jello and cottage cheese if he's good. the poor bastard can barely get it in his mouth. then, in comes the head of the fbi and george soros, eager to decide which innocent americans they'll audit, execute, and harvest for adrenochrome.

then, "jeopardy!" always "jeopardy," never misses it. then, back to evil! until early bedtime at 7:00, where he returns to the coffin in his underground lair, surrounded by the bats he's using to start the next covid. >> desi: wow. okay, this is on fox? >> this is all on fox. >> desi: i don't know if i can believe all of that at once. >> the good news is, you don't have to. just believe whatever parts keep you scared enough to watch through the commercial break, and fox news will be happy. and don't get too afraid, though, joe biden can smell fear from over a mile away. it's how he hunts. >> desi: wow. truly terrifying. thank you for that, jordan klepper. jordan klepper, everyone. when we come back, we'll find out why duluth is ready for the end of the world. so don't go away. [cheers and applause]

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toes? [both] oh that's fresh! ♪♪ ♪ old spice whistle ♪ no freezers? how unusual is this for a restaurant? i think that that's unusual because a lot of restaurants have freezers. but we don't have freezers. we have fresh food every single day. how fresh is fresh? it's real food that's coming to our tables. that's what sets us apart. wow. [cheers and applause] >> desi: welcome back to "the daily show." it's only a matter of time before rising sea levels swallow america's coastline. but where will the coastal elites go? michael kosta went to find out.

>> super hurricanes. drought. wildfires turning new york city the color of sunny d. across america, climate change is wreaking havoc and driving people from their homes and experts say, this is only the beginning. >> this is in the order of millions of people. >> where might they go? climate researchers say the answer is in and up. think duluth. >> wow. so millions of coastal elites like myself will one day be flocking to minnesota? is this the city of the future? let's find out. am i moving? i can't feel my legs. i am not moving. why was there not a jacket in my suitcase? to learn more, i met with chief sustainability officer, mindy. >> tell me about duluth. >> well, duluth is a great city, we have a great lake, we have lots of fresh water. >> do you mind if we finish this inside? i don't go inside and seven seconds, my heart will explode. >> of course. >> oh, my gosh. let's go, let's go, let's go. what were you saying about duluth?

>> what were you saying about duluth? >> well, experts have called duluth a climate rest future because we are a place that is fairly safe from the worst effects of climate change. >> you are talking about in 50 years when this climate change thing really gets bad, right? >> a few people are moving here now from california because of climate change. >> you are telling me people are moving here from the good states? >> yes. >> mindy claims duluth has big advantages, like 10% of the world's drinking water in lake superior, and room for up to 10,000 new residents, because it is basically that bear an ice planet from "star wars." >> some people can handle 80 inches of snow every winter -- >> 80 inches of snow? >> over 80. >> jesus christ. do you think those big u.n. climate change summit's would be more effective if people knew that the alternative was having to move to duluth? >> well, there is really no bad weather. there is just bad clothing. >speak about clothing. of people are still wearing

balenciaga here? >> we don't know what that is. >> despite this vast cultural divide, cultural refugees are getting ready to flood duluth. but are the locals prepared? >> there is a migrant caravan of californians coming. they are bringing their spin instructors, their computer makers, their oat milk. are you ready for that? >> i don't mind having a few more friends. >> any advice for refugees that are coming here? >> sure. you need to dress really warm. >> they can't dress warm because and they would lose their job with instagram models. >> going to be hard to be a bikini model here. >> you are laughing but this is important to my culture. >> your culture. >> it felt like we were speaking to different languages but how deep was this divide? >> polo or rugby? >> rugby. >> why? >> because i like sports that -- >> i don't mean this board, i'm talking about names for children. polo or rugby? >> neither. >> are there any members only, exclusive clubs here? >> well, they are sam's club and

costco. >> can i do cocaine in the bathroom there? >> even got some words of wisdom from former duluth mayor emily larson, seen here in a press conference last july. >> duluth is gritty and resilient and real. we work hard. we really care about each other. >> that is going to be tough for some of these people in l.a. because they don't work hard and they don't care about each other. think about the first wave of californians are already here, so how are they surviving? >> it does feel like another planet sometimes. >> meet x californian and environmentalist jamie alexander. >> we packed into a camper van thinking we would drive out here and spend the summer and then wildfire season of 2020 happened and i decided to move my family here because of climate change. >> let's be honest. is it duluth -- >> duluthians? >> let's be honest, there is no

duluthians here. this place [bleep] sucks. >> it doesn't. i love it here. i love to live in a place that feels real. >> people say that duluthians are more real people. new yorkers spits in my face, it feels pretty real. >> yeah, i think what is meant by that is here, you are connected to your neighbors. everywhere is going to experience climate impacts if a climate related weather event happen, would you be able to lean on your neighbors? >> i have lived in new york for seven years. i don't know my neighbor and i don't want to know my neighbor. do you have a winter jacket for me? this is not cutting it. my bmi is, like, under 2%. you know what i'm saying? jamie told me to really understand duluthians, i would have to walk a mile in their shoes, even if mine were nicer. these boots are nice, i'm not going to get snow on them, am i? >> you probably will. >> ready to go? >> let's go.

>> shoot! they are kind of hard to walk in at first. okay there goes my suit. hey, those look like huge almost rats. >> they are deer. >> do they ever take the pizza out of your hand when you're on the subway or anything? >> no. >> no? you are lucky. >> duluth was starting to grow on me but there was just one problem. >> the idea that there is a climate-proof city is, not true at all, and b, it is dangerous, because every place on earth is experiencing climate impacts and climate change is happening now and people are making huge, life-changing decisions because of it. >> than what the [bleep] am i doing here? i left my wife and family for a week to come here and it's not even a real climate refuge? >> no. >> damn. i knew the only thing that could cheer up this coastal elite was hitting the spa, but unfortunately for me, and duluth, even the spot is

terrifying. >> we had to remove 30 inches of ice so that you can go jump in it. >> oh, my god. >> and your body is going to tell you you are going to die, but you were retraining some of those neural pathways in your head to say, hey, i can handle hard stuff. >> i can handle this. maybe once i get used to it, the cold isn't so bad -- >> [screaming] i am frozen to it! >> at least i can go back to new york. god. that is my car! [cheers and applause] >> desi: thank you, michael. when we come back, maite alberdi will be joining me on the show. so don't go away. [cheers and applause]

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[cheers and applause] >> desi: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a producer and director whose film, "the eternal memory," is currently nominated for an academy award for best documentary feature. >> [speaking spanish] >> [speaking spanish] [laughter] >> [speaking spanish] [laughter] >> [speaking spanish] >> [speaking spanish]

>> desi: please welcome maite alberdi! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ oh, maite, thank you so much for being here. this film is so beautiful. i loved it so much. congratulations on your oscar nomination. >> thank you! [cheers and applause] >> desi: this isn't your first. this is your second oscar nomination. first you were nominated for "the mole agent" which was also an incredible film. if you haven't seen it, go watch it. but this particular film, "the eternal memory," is such a beautiful story. it is centered around a man who is living with alzheimer's, and his wife who is caring for him,

and it completely took me by surprise at how joyful and inspiring this film is, and truly, it is a powerful love story. did you know that going into it, when you went to make it? or was it something that unfolded as you went on? >> thank you. you make the perfect description of the film, i think, because i really felt it for the first time, was a love story. i always said it is a big love story in the context of alzheimer's, when alzheimer's is not a tragedy, it is only a challenge. yes, since i met them personally, i was so surprised that they can have a relationship and be in love, and trying to be in the world, like, not living alzheimer's as a drama, being a couple, and that it was very special for me from the beginning.

>> desi: i love that so much about the film, that she was bringing him out into the world. he was doing everything with her. they were going on long walks and having these lovely scenes in the cafe, enjoying a lunch together and laughing, and just really being so loving with one another. you chose to tell the story in a nonlinear way. we sort of travel through time through footage, home video footage that they took from years ago as a young family, to modern day, to a period of time through the pandemic. what inspires you to tell the story that way? >> yeah, i think that was very important to me to not make the chronical of deterioration that i think we are used to seeing films of alzheimer's and fiction films that are drama of deterioration, and in this case, i wanted to build the story of a memory and how a memory of a relationship, and how you see that relationship through years. for me, it is a film about 25

years of relationship, not only the moment that i was a viewer of, the last five years. so it was the idea of constructing what was meaningful for them today of the past and how you can understand what he is still remembering today of the previous years. >> desi: something like over 55 million people in this world suffer from dementia-related diseases, so this clearly has a huge impact on a lot of people in this world. what do you hope for people who are dealing with it, personally or within their families, what do you hope they take away from the film? >> yeah, i think it's that number plus the caregivers that are with this person, it is always a situation of isolation. and for me, this is the perfect example how we can be with the disease, at least the first years.

like, trying to be in the world, trying to be in society, trying to enjoy the present. and here in the film, we see something that is very special. because when he got isolated, was in the covid period and he deteriorated so fast. the doctors told us, he got very fast because he didn't have the sociability that he had before. for me, it is a very good example of how we have to integrate people with dementia into society and caregivers too. >> desi: that's right. that is so right. you know, i just want to thank you for making this film. >> thank you very much. >> desi: it is something that has affected my family as well and it is so inspiring to see the story being told in such an honest way and in a way that doesn't grieve what has been lost, but really celebrates all the love and the joy that remains. >> the good love and the good life.

thank you very much. [cheers and applause] >> desi: "the eternal memory" is streaming now exclusively on paramount plus. maite alberdi, everyone! [cheers and applause] we're going to take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ [traffic noise] [text message] let's ace this thing! ♪ ♪ i got you coffee. oh my god, what? you literally read my mind. got you, girl. ♪ jazz music ♪ ♪

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>> desi: that's our show for tonight. now here it is. your "moment of zen." >> lawyers for her son hunter just had to explain in court a filing that this photo -- look at this photo come from his phone, that the government prosecutor's claim show lines of cocaine. that is what the government prosecutors are saying. they are saying, that is sawdust. take a good look at sawdust that is lined up in perfect little lines. take a close look. does that look like sawdust to you? we will let you decide that. ♪ i'm goin' down to south park, gonna have myself a time ♪ ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ ♪ goin' down to south park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪

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