sion but it comes with the risk of revising old regional tensions of the exit documentary on the question of how we want to die. i been puzzling back with more news next down the type of data. so much for the 1st 4 years. the sisters have been in a coma close by persecution and flights. meanwhile, for con dreams of another world wake up on not starts june 1st on dw, the most people spend their final days here in a hospital. although most of us would prefer to die at home,

only very few do. so. is there too much end of life treatment? is not everything that's possible is necessary. so am i acting in the patient's interest so it should not be anyone else has interest and definitely not for economic interests. how much help should we expect from doctors? and how much to the patient's own wishes count and thoughts in the patients system most kind of ending up on life support like 20 years of staring at the ceiling adult on me for that being able to speak. i'm a drama die to have to accept box of tea and our hospitals actually profiting from end of life treatment. the dying is often a taboo subject and one with much potential for conflict. data to edit, 1st to earth shoots ashes to ashes, dust to dust,

the the around half of the population in germany will take their last breath in a hospital for a better look at death and dying with tubes and ventilator. we've come to an intensive care when the doctors are on their morning rounds with them all. good, good morning. good. as to how are you you all the you have a serious circulation problem in your heart muscle. at the moment, we're not happy with how things are looking and this will move, so we're going to take care of you a bit longer. okay, and i'll see all of the why does so many people die in hospital beds and

not peacefully at home. there's any i'll have to of identity because if you don't either on our rounds, we see very many elderly patients, caesar and they often have many different illnesses coming done, plus, and they still come to hospital. so it's kind of caused some of the voting. you try to help them somehow, but as we see in this case, in front of these co morbidities are so extensive hope to talk that in conjunction with the results we got yesterday on the home for them. there is not a lot you can do. that's one, even though it's influenced, hasn't come over young since wants to switch to palliative care preparing one for end of life. but like so many people's a man hasn't loved a patient's decree, young since tries without success, to reach the man's relatives, to find out how much more treatment a man should be given in. yeah, i spend about 2 hours

a day on the phone. it feels like because i think it's important to talk to the gps for me, but it's incredibly difficult to really of the initial we have. so he has a serious non treatable coronary heart condition for now and and yes. so that's why it's uh that was really very important. and kent and the doctor knows him well. he also told the gp that if there were to be great complications, he didn't want to be put in intensive care. but that's important because now we have a clear path to take, even if it wasn't specifically written out and was this the out the door. it means that we won't be able to help him stay alive then. but we'll try to ensure that he can depart this world peacefully and painlessly said the tribe and the men walks. i'll take the backpack, i don't know whether it's down there. i'm going downstairs. okay.

but life threatening situations on the intensive care. we aren't always the slow and steady intensive care medic, elise neu, decker is on her way to an emergency one floor down. as a woman has been recessive, dated, and needs to be taken to intensive care. now for further treatment, it's unclear whether she'll survive the system and then again quickly once in intensive care, she's immediately attached to every live sustaining machine possible. of course medics, one to hear people like many who come to the intensive care unit don't survive.

the 20 minutes have passed the least. could you describe what's happening? yes. the push buttons and it's in ask of faith as a v. as a patient has been on a heart catheter, they did everything they could to help her, but unfortunately nothing was working. and she died again, we're waiting for the family now. it's what was important to us. well, for the last step, that's what it was that we were able to be with that patient. make sure she had no pain or fear to kinda august of to see me to come in to ok. we were with her by and were holding her hand at the last minute because we were the only ones here and for, for the relatives were still on their way. yeah. a lot of money on google. they can send mobile. does that makes patients coming to intensive care are getting older and older?

so often they are already sick with many illnesses that prevent them from recovering . it's been up to the doctors to decide if and how long to prolong life into the for this, if we took a normal chunk of intensive care, allows enormous opportunities, but also risks bringing that together requires cultural understanding them team as a team, you have to keep finding ways to help the patient have a dignified test and all, and also to accept that death and dying is also part of a therapeutic process. have a fortune possesses. modern medicine often means the process of dying can be very drawn out. it often leaves doctors to make the decision on when to continue treatment, and when to let someone die moving on, since he's on his way to a meeting with the ethics commission. this is where experts from various disciplines convene to decide on whether or not to withdraw life prolonging

measures. today, the commission is discussing the fate of a gravely ill lung patient. he's been in intensive care for several weeks. he's been kept alive on a ventilator deep behind because of his deteriorating ability to breathe. treatments requires ventilation. he is experiencing different phases of infection infections. that's all healing phases of wakefulness and of confusion. coke. he's out his physical limits every day. would you like to add anything between looking to types of data on so we're really just trying malta and this future is not looking much better because we don't cnn. okay. that's the question was, was it a, this, this series to assess the fargo? how much longer can we continue doing this? you know, where's the and what is all call inputs? that's an issue. what was the, have another piece for satellite? we've already been trying him for

a long time to get some of the ventilator. we keep reaching the 4 hour mark by continuous spontaneous breathing has failed the several times the most, the most glue that has ever missed. the risk is so great if we took them off, you would certainly suffer oregon failure, send them an authority to stays on the ventilator must then come, then he will continue to live. must fund what is known about his wishes, which for treatments villain have never really made any explicit statements that see that's so we don't have any exact information about the patient's wishes and have any pets haven't been. so may, as long as it's nice and would value for saying he can't be taken off the ventilator. and then we're looking at a long term permanent dependence on a ventilator either at home or somewhere out there. the awesome i'll and then how is that something his family can for see for or not or so i'm go. how does the stories dissolves under the sun? wouldn't know his wishes to go home, but i don't see it as

a viable option. every few days we take a step backward carter of the dentist with 2 kids. the patient becomes full of mucus, again, slight gets really distressed, which uses up all his energy and one week. i don't see that being any different at home as well. thanks to hold on this, i'm assign the size of the water that information i have that means that fulfilling his wish to go home and which means he's on the ventilator. it's one in 24 hour intensive castle, and that would make things difficult for his families. and so to 250 familiar designs, all under stank office, then they didn't have on the whole of the, for the yes, i agree. if we can transfer mr. a back home, it would be purely palliative edition of the way mr. a sees it. however, he's not seeing himself as bed bound of what it's supposed to be on this, but there is no alternative. he cannot move freely side. when he's think of this,

i think that we're talking about a palliative scenario. question, honestly, we will in accordance with his wishes, send him home, but i don't think it could be for a long time in the sizes of light and use being pro, citing pastoral catch of the family and patient for a long time. so there's lots of teamwork and some, oh i kind of the kansas names. they did speak extensively about the end of his life from a religious point of view of him. but the zip for the other. his wife couldnt imagine turning the home into an intensive care room, as if which is what being put on a ventilator at home meals, and when somebody into the system to hold on and process. instead, she told me that in her view, we should stand humbly at the end of our lives and be thankful for the long time they had together. since we discussed that in the last few days. that's not a strong team. i. yes. and then that's in time to sizes induce that means best commission has decided that that should be

a transition to palliative care to the relatives have to be informed on the ongoing . no, i cool. do that informed me. okay. awesome. so you'll definitely have to deal with that. the next time you speak english. thank you. your style. gosh, not every hospital has such an ethics commission. you read in here about element, we're discussing ethical decisions that are not of a medical nature, but that concern us as humans. the name of these are still 2400. and we believe that if such a structure is not in place. so then it should be mandatory english to designers, for physicians that we have left the decision on for life and death in the hands of the doctors. i wonder why is it so unusual for people to die?

a natural death at home if i had so i'm not going to visit to mail to the patient now, but they have an issue. i've been involved in the cache since last week talking to me because she was having serious breathing problem was actually a little skilled, unfair that in my mind had 1st they kept calling me. i'm going to say something, but now she doesn't want to go to hospitals. because she knows if she calls and i'm good on life, and then she'll end up in the clinic and gets him as a fund any clinic. but he is, terrence is an anesthesiologist and palliative medic, he visits terminally ill or dying people where they've chosen to die at home, surrounded by their families. hello, good afternoon. it's going to be like toys. nope. i'll head straight through. hello everyone. hello, hello. can tack? hi lou. traffic your systems, we don't,

i'll sit down here again. perfect, perfect. as estimate as soon as possible. my 1st visit was you were very anxious because someone of the clinic i told you you were dying feet in the knowledge that felt since you've been home to let some tiger. awfully shop or no, i'm not scad. and haven't had anything untoward. any thoughts of my trouble, mainly prescription saved, and when did you have as many praising episodes in the past few di and the author, they stopped coming altogether. middle of the table? no, no more shortness of breath. i would ask you haven't noticed anything? have you? no, no god, i'm amazed that has been going so well and wondered what to say and i feel as though you are in your best bet, dad. no, no, no. no. obviously didn't applaud you mind to 5. listen. lean forward and 4. perfect, perfect. t

for 100 and a deep breath in and out these web dish to stand the house. she's basically come home to die. that's the blunt way of putting as he does for both her and us. it's how pursuit auction i can use. we can enjoy the time we have left to and it's nice having mama here again can be 1st lot of marketing. we all have to face this some time or rather, to be honest. so she doesn't bother me. honestly. yeah. maybe i'm the exception because i'm different. my mother's you, i'm just being older. i don't know how other people take it kind of do you have no idea how others deal with knowing they are going to die in the next few days. i've ordered for life connections, but i think it's all totally natural that he's got such huge. yeah. so it's

a strange situation there, perhaps for you more than maintenance. but i don't mind. my worry is that it happens late, not young. i'm not. and she con 3 c a. m plus had them. i know most, nobody knows it. right? yeah, i can help her immediately as a practice she oh, as of what is your before and you're just in the potential. how's of we want to ensure the top patients are doing well on awesome to make himself a breathing problems. i know nausea or vomiting any time and been dismissed. obviously can't be helped to home. yeah. then the only place is the clint annual, the clinic. yeah. and then my not about to how is the best, how would, if you can be treated at home. and then people stay at home done, and loved dimensions. so how's most problems can be resolved through simple medication. me to come in and we only have 7 different medicines and our emergency box is on no type of you can treat 20 problems that all patients often have sponsors basically giving instructions on the fine example of tabi. so how is the

losing and conceive of telephone is it to or i just okay, and if you have any problems get in touch. otherwise i'll see you again next week. cool. the best shopping times the step ahead of the grim reaper. i still have a little time left. that's funny. i'm a visa. yeah. that's in. when did you see how much of patients who come home again tend to flourish? she's practically just been discharged from a hospital death bed, but you'd hardly say she looks like she's going to die and the next few days down here on the country here this week. she's dramatically improved on the about what else have to patient has no,

i die puts in. i deal with the to every day. so to the just the lights on minutes company people at the end of the lives of changes around us would be fulfilling. okay. i should think because you often managed a severe pain or breathing difficulties this kind of course, i can't say my patients' lives. a few of them are not, but for many of them, the total death is no longer the enemy. any starting to find managed to ensure that they have a painless processing system is that is a good thing. let's go to the 92 year old in a martin, died a month later at home as she had wanted. but how can one ensure that you're the one who decides how you dine the

we've heard from a former intensive care worker. she says she would never want to be recessive, stated the high a, hey, it's for the so you've taken steps to ensure that if the paramedic comes and you're unconscious, that you wouldn't be recessive, dated is that right? and whatever, you know, only if my heart keeps out when done. and when the paramedics arrives to say that it, that it is when the door closes, see that the close the screen stick a note, there's an emergency buckle that on the emergency. barclay's in the fridge, then gate, then they go to the kitchen. and when they open the door, you the best, the bottle, and what's in there. and the doors this and there's a document with lots of patient information in info. i'm not feeling this that's

good. okay, and here once he written in big red, let us do not for such a date and why don't you want that? but as i've seen too many things back when i was working a symbol, you mean you wouldn't want to be taken to the hospital then like i didn't want to go to hospital and i don't want to be put on a ventilator ok to life bike shapes the who knows how long it's always been for the bad. the 89 year old is familiar with the procedures on intensive care stations. is this does what is it as do you have the feeling that just too much is done to keep people alive? the people aren't allowed to die. yeah. and they will mindfulness? yes. comes from the moment you arrive in the hospital system? no, it's like hit the paramedics, the ash the don't exist in cameras. have to do everything in the power to keep me in line. after the 1st he does have

a substitute aged may institute for me with that. so then that's exactly what i don't want to spend the 70 if what was it that you experienced that made you say no, i do not want that to happen to me. it says will accept the nasa live test, but that's in the i often so elderly people being re sell so tiny take yeah. even then they will put you on i, these are the ones that husband ventilate, says 12 and finally dying days, weeks let's months later talking and i don't think you need that would be that side . so i want to know if my life the way i want until the end, that's the one i can no longer do that just makes me and then not should be the end of it. so and again the,

it's rare to day that people are in control of their lives at the end of life. will the former nurse get her wish will she encounter paramedics so wouldn't recessive teacher in such a scenario? the, the 89 year old fears that she might end up like this patient, this terminally ill cancer patient is on live support in a coma after being recessive tate. it, after his heart stopped. intensive care nurse at least knowing decker is looking after him. i'm just going to check something, don't worry of his kidney and deliver have already filled and his brain is barely functioning. that's it. and then we don't believe licensed. also when patients are resuscitated, usually outside their homes or they arrive here and are given every medical treatment possible. and then you find out like in this case that the brain is had

too little oxygen during resuscitation. for though we often see patients not wake up and then it's days or weeks before instrumental diagnostics to tell us that they're actually not able to wake up again, let me do a pop up to you. there's no sticks in. their brains are so terribly damage to us that we can't help them. so events associated with inputs, engine. yeah. national harris and could and this 58 year old is also not going to wake up a lease is giving him palliative care and will accompany him as he dies. so this one i've got everything ready the do you always talk to your patients? yeah, yes. right, because i always assume that they can perhaps they'll hear something too. we always

do our best, especially for patients who are dying. so since you always respect your patients, that effects what inputs in the mind has so what usually happens when doctors go from trying to save someone's life to recognizing they will die, then giving them it's an ongoing for them to not leave me to come, we accompany family members into the room, the medication has already been swap to hide those pain killers and associates and other medication to protect the patient to ensure they're not in distress. and then we switch off life support option. we always wait a little moment to him and dr. young relatives have to adjust to the situation. is this you could you it's always hard to sit next to the bed and comprehend your family member is about to die. one of the most frequent questions that relatives ask is how long will it take up there? always scared, it will happen right away,

but it varies from patient to patient fun, but usually it takes around 2 days. but that is a very long time from 012 days, and then the patient dies because they're already very weak and also not going to come to the phone for your account. and the terminally ill patients in room 3 has no relatives here to sit with him. and while death is part of the daily conversation here at the hospital, in our society, it has increasingly become a taboo. the phones out on $75.00 or something. yes. cuz this off south, west one, we really need to seriously ask ourselves as a society what we want to store and what we don't want. in my experience and i often meet relatives and patients and intensive care itemize the who are still surprised to that at 8590 the 92 years old, 3 percent. and they've reached a period of life where you have to consider it's and one to show us my, the one,

the thing content, the says leaving english is but modern medicine has also failed to sufficiently keep up with the growing age of people. there are few fully qualified palliative medics on intensive care wings. instead, many people faced lengthy and invasive forms of treatment. sometimes this is because the doctor isn't sure what to do. but also sometimes because of the financial benefit, there's much money that can be made by implementing these complex end of life procedures. from issues as far as us and percents into it's much easier as a doctor to into a patient of us to give them oxygen to feed, i have to resuscitate them. replace their kidney with this. of them have this critical discussion about whether we're genuinely doing the right thing for the patient of the our only responsibility is to the patient that's going from not to anyone else. we need to assess this in and when some fields of medicine become more

interested in making money increase on the or perhaps not officially and explicitly, then medicine is on a very rocky road starting to get c mind on. so i got him. that's what's been happening for the past 20 years. citizen sponsor, shaun sufficient to come up. how can i be the people end up being treated in a hospital against their will for financial profit? usually we assume doctors are there to help us at the end of our on the but just find the will of the doctor can be incredibly difficult and painful. the like for how look lender, who's fighting for doctors to allow his wife to dine in peace

of mind for the people here. associates 6, this is my wife in t hold. that picture is 6 years old. now let's see. i look at her hair. she's 68 now, and this is what she looks like in this stuff. it's awful. i want to save her from ending up lying there miserably. even prophetically, she won't leave. i owe that to her. usual. it's such a long time. yeah. yes. intensive care for 3 months to she's been there since august 12th. she's had 18 operations here. inglewood lender went to the hospital 5 months ago for back operation, where she became infected with a super buck. despite several operations, doctors haven't been able to defeat it. that the, the blue i have got picture showing what she looks like now you can see on permanent live support move a respirator and intravenous feeding was in the of all 4 months ago. helmets wife's

heart stopped since then. she's been on live support and in a coma neurological tests suggest that there's little likelihood of improvement. she'd already put her wishes down in a plan for treatment, a most the advertisement. i just want to make sure her will is followed heavy advice. war to her that she wouldn't end up on machines for years in a home somewhere, just lying there that's to me. she doesn't deserve that. and she doesn't want it to don't mind can. you can go through all these points, those never pages of them. i just, everything's there in the case of brain damage, unreadable, illness, near death. it's all their own and brain shutting down. it's all written down. exactly. but they are ignoring at all. i tell them read it, it's all there. it's but we just go round in circles and keep coming back to the same point of think life and pulled on dozens of it and no one listens to you even though you have power of attorney on this. go ahead. no, no,

not at all. that's weir, ignore you. all you hear is we decide what happened. that's how it is in germany. it doesn't matter how many people come with their treatment plan and we have to perform any treatment we can before. anything else is you the nation's p of? i say, what exactly is it that you're doing stuff on demand, or when i say i just want it to ends, we get to the box will see our helmets. health insurance company has helped him find a medical expert for a 2nd professional opinion. it's hope that they'll help to finally carry out the wishes of his wife. i'm fixing go toolbar vice tibbets by your i was with her last on october 6th for it was the day before the altar perforated and her heart stop. will you have to on hatch this done on time the we're religious people and we only spoke about those things. awesome. and we said goodbye once for us and we'd see each other and it turn it to go. she said she was ready to go and advise if she said she was going. i said, don't say that. she said, yes, you know, i am. give me

a case. let's see if i had just given her some yogurt. and that's how it went done this stuff. so it's hard to bear really hard. a musty company is on the host in a week's time, how much lender has another meeting at the hospital for hours away. he hopes the doctors will give in after the experts report and start giving his wife palliative care. this is the statement we got from the hospital. in the event of regaining consciousness, there is a possibility that mrs. linda could breeze on her own and at least partial physical rehabilitation. although a temporary or permanent need for life support measures cannot be ruled out as such, because the situation is not mentioned specifically in the patients preferred treatment plan. and recovery cannot be ruled out. medical steps have been taken thus far,

so that the patients assumed wishes could be determined the how can seriously ill people be sure their wishes are carried out. the palliative care doctor much use terms is the author of the report on mrs. lenders case. he's to decide whether or not the doctor should he's the wishes of the 68 year old. much he has turns dedicates himself to dignified dying, not to the interest of business, and such disputes make him sad and angry. mrs lenders case is not an exception. i think it's under puts it in for whom question has been in fact a patient's preferred treatment plan is legally binding intact with that, but that's not subscribed for interpretation. sometimes the boundaries of pushed on treatment continues to month on like the patient obviously doesn't ones that often

cuz i failed to ask what the outcome of treatment to be in a peak is what someone wishes to be the outcome. actually the goal and if the treatment that is it isn't even the chief of all the highs and often even if i can, this guy isn't, doesn't, it's on the chief of the highest or the treatment. is that something that really bothers me and my was the last, when a decision should have been taking a lot earlier feed for the provision of appropriate, probably unsafe cat on the t f. as on the homeless who monitors what the doctors are doing? what's the legal situation in germany? the puts and partner law firm is specialized in end of life legislation. they deal on an almost daily basis with cases that focus on the will of the patient and how to best implemented going types of just to us conflict as much as you basically,

our friends begins with the views at any medical intervention, including those that for normal life, even if it's a ventilator is physically invasive, i'm because it has to be justified. i didn't mean an intervention is only justified uninstalled when there is a medical reason for it. a small downturn agreement by the patient, or that's just not as the last name. if there is no reason for medical intervention, because it would cause more harm than good if it's causing a more distress, then being able to achieve a sense of will go into cups, then things change life for then what has being carried out is and then legal assault, i think it is a crime. however, the federal prosecutor will usually not convict adult to for, for loaning life. they always seek a way to avoid that and i will speak. so talking to fulton, tanya owner has seen repeated cases in which doctors are uncertain. and over treat their patients because of it. but she's also seeing them act out of financial

interest on the common things that as the one on the legal path. if the doctor was suspected of acting solely out of financial gain and which of the one behind them loosen f, as it is a fast released on this list, a suspicion is a blue waist lingering in the room. but it's hard to enforce the nor on the basis of the current legislation because you have to prove that the assault was committed to my attention league. i remember full financial gain on to if you have the relatives would on the 22nd. if they say their relative has been allowed to suffer from the distress as being per learned, only for the don't use it to make money even following up. you have the chance of getting a 2nd opinion homes. you not to listen with the lucas, preferably from adult to, to has nothing to gain from the street. $26.00 other missed under a $150.00. and the fact is that in the future will lead more doctors who are familiar with palliative care and take a more critical approach to their work. which one is the winner here?

ethics or economics, schumann, or machine. elmwood lender has driven 4 hours from his home and lower sacks and the to the clinic. he wants one more talk with the doctors to convince them to heed the will of his wife and allow her to die confusing most. so you will not know if she's been lying in this hospital for 4 months and an intensive care, it'd be co adjust to the thought of it is terrible. so i'm just like, like, i mean i've made an appointment and i'm going there now. when cool, i'm fighting for my wife's rights. yeah. they do it because it's through. it's a terrible injustice. what's happening today because it's hard to that's why i've come expressly to tell these doctors that woke her to the mice isn't absences, arden for 4 months, the doctors have refused to follow the wishes of their patient in group lender.

it's going to be a long and hard discussion between how much lender and the doctors because there's been no agreement so far. a local judge has been brought in. she's due to rule to dance what she believes. so the wishes of english lender 4 hours later up to follow up with us. i am delighted all for the tv that's one. so with the media, the fact your palliative care is going to begin it. that means nothing to stop her from dying on guns. it's been a long battle for a very, very sad thing for you on, but i had to do it. does this and i'm glad i did this. i feel a sense of relief now. yeah. yeah. there's a deep grief, but also relief with the support. i will feel like the

child does all kinds of stuff. lunch adds to mines in this. it's very alarming how some doctors think they have to apply every possible medical application every time i've got the assessment on the job as doctors progress as a doctor, just to have to ask yourself, what is the goal if the treatment is nice and then what can we achieve for the patient attend, and if we cannot to chief the patient's recovery eyes and for the best type will only leave them on life support and stuff. and that's not something the individual patient would have wished for themselves, the 100 project to attend. and then we have the doctors have to accept that the goal of treating dentist is unobtainable to stay on. the goal must change hygiene. when can the worst case scenario except to allow that patients to die and just them, let's say what does a humane desk look like when the patient is not at home? no?

to you soon puts in friends when i see a patient like that, it really makes my heart ache. it's all just cool. mm hm. at least knowing decker's patient has suddenly deteriorated. today. his breathing was difficulty. caring for him in this condition isn't easy. the tip of certain task is yesterday, his breathing was so stable that we decided to remove his ventilation to huntington . the awesome show house of 10. we reduce the medication that was helping him sleep in himself, hudson, 100 of my own type of shows to food. now i'm in a dilemma or some of the cities, very distress instead of stress. so this isn't, i've had to call the doctor's and started giving in the sleep medication again,

men just don't know buying and roman having 5 issues or not because i don't want to leave him like that. so what it says is really a distress. this is called heart rate of label, at least waits for the lead doctor to come and help me. it says, oh my god, i know now i'm treading a fine line revised most of us not to i don't want my patients to be so distressed me. so wish test is, but i don't want him to die because of what i'm giving him stuff on social security because he's no longer on a ventilator schmidt. the awesome that is to set this up to us. that's why i'm taking it really slowly on understand. so there's also a very sin line between accompanying someone at the end of life and assisting them in at the doctor can ease the situation for the patient by changing the

medication. that's on his mission, meaning come in, we should manage the symptoms. now with medication for success, the most important thing for you to are in for this treatment is end of life care with symptom management. and the patients breathing is back under control. the process of dying slowly moves on. this is the motive as the initial and focus to, to my phone. if it's always my personal aim to do things i would want done for me, it would have been if me or a member of my family were lying there. i was just a, it's a dream job for you, isn't this michael? it is my dream job. my absolute dream job to at home. i couldn't imagine doing anything else and it was flushed in a lease as patient donna is later that evening. the,

it's english lenders funeral. she dies 5 days after her treatment was switched to end of life care at the hospital. you should have almost got to come up in the floor. i have to find a piece now. but i'm glad that with a lot of help, i managed to see her last wish, realized it. but we have our faith and faith helps a lot on deck. love with the stop by. and i will be able to find my own way and carry on somehow. and one of the, the, the lord shall bless your farewell under rifle, nervous and forever more than the

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