tv Gutfeld FOX News December 13, 2023 7:00pm-8:00pm PST
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biden will do the least amount possible and we're going to have to push him at every turn to get change. real change comes in 24 when we elect a new president. >> adam: we better get that border secure. >> amen. >> adam: i'll tell you one day if we're attacked by these illegal immigrants he's let in he will have blood on his hands. you agree with that? >> sean i've never been more worried for a terrorist attack. how easy would it be for terrorists to get in the middle of this crowd. ten thousand yesterday, the last six days we averaged ten thousand a day and 1.7 million got-aways. if you're trying to avoid detection, you're probably up to no good. >> sean: lindsey graham thank you. that's all the time we have. please set your dvr, never miss an episode, in the meantime let not your heart be troubled, why, greg gutfeld is standing by to put a smile on your face. thank you for being with us and making this show possible. have a great night. ♪
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[cheers and applause] >> greg: yes, i agree! i agree! happy wednesday, everybody. so every now and then you see something that captures why things everywhere seem to be falling apart these days. no, not just that i'm talking about a theory called chesterton's physicians. the rule is never destroy a fence change a rule or do away with a tradition until you understand why it was there in the first place. i would also add removing a breast implant. wow, dead crowd tonight, huh? >> tyrus: not a lot of breast implants. >> greg: that's good advice on par with don't poop where you eat which is why joe biden no
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longer has lunch in the oval office. you don't deserve that joke. but chester top's rule goes to the heart of all this chaos. many social constructs that have held things together really come down to fences, metaphorical and literal. fences and rules packed by western values that helped preserve order and make for a good life. it wasn't perfect, but it was a hell of a lot better than the alternatives offered by dick at a timeers in europe asia or the third world. but as the us continues to fumble on the world stage and our campuses ring with the chants of hey hey ho ho western sieve has got to go the fences are coming down faster than hunter biden's pants at a cheerleading camp. what's filling that space is mindless row degrees i haveism which is anything less than progress. the bar bear action are at the gates because we got rid of the gates. in israel the destruction of the literal physicians launched terror attacks by the west bank.
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in gaza a 25 mile long fence separating the israelis and palestinians. but was also breached was a fence that was also an idea. the idea that western style democracy is preferable to society ruled by a corrupt military cabal who makes saddam hussein look like sandy duncan. it was two tribes separated by fences, but also by centuries. it would be like if george jettison built a mansion next to the flint stones. so of course the american hating western woke elite sides with whatever's been working best which makes israel the oppressors and hamas the resistance. but have they thought this through? do they actually want to sport hamas's system elsewhere? to hamas savages, lgbt stand for let's go bomb and terror ice. it's the same here at home as most of us try to conserve rules and traditions that have made the american system the most successful ever. regress i have progressives are
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looking to tear down defenses of capitalism and law and order in favor of fundamental change. and it's changing all right. what you're seeing in the streets is what the fence kept at bay, simplistic a moral protests based on lineage and tribal warfare. following the death of george floyd our entire criminal justice system was pegged as institutionally racist. so cash bail went away. shoplifting became reparations, 40 acres and a mule became ten men in speed sticks and 15 tubes of peps dent. defund and incartsration became delightful. is it working? anyone want to buy a bachelor pad in manhattan? i promise to have it fume gated. what happens when you tear down the fence of criminal justice you get new york philly baltimore san fran la portland seattle memphis houston austin. i could keep going but if i do i'll sound like stephen hawking by the time i'm done. is this really what the dems want coast to coast, one wig
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giant pile of [bleep]. and then there's our southern border the bit of fence with holes you can drive the cast of the view through. president biden is more terrified of his party's left wing than he is of stairs so any notion of defining the idea of the united states is, you guessed it, institutionally racist. if that's true, then every nation on earth is institutionally racist. now it's right about here where a liberal would say greg you're just an entitled privileged cracker what about all the impoverished black and brown people of the world. do you think they would feel. to which i would brilliantly reply, why don't you ask them yourself as they pour over our southern border by the millions to live in a country you hate so much. we're even dismantling the border between genders. personally i'm okay with a fence between the fences, although there's always some genders no fence can contain. if there's no border that can define the sexes you get a generation of dissolutioned
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unproductive people living in isolation and denial. most of civilization up to the modern age has been a war against regress ive tribalism we created laws and freedoms that were imperfect but were there for a reason and now we have a generation deciding that the fences must come down never mind their initial necessity. now, to have a good life you do need a structure but sadly you get no reward when that structure works, because how do you show the bad things that you stopped if they never really occurred? so the young and naive have a choice between an imperfect unprovable good and the evil it hoots at bay and they choose evil without fail. perhaps the result of a country so successful and decadent it leaves bored mind sidal ideas. so it tears down structures without contemplating them in the first place. that's the law. which reminds me of gutfeld's
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law some people are you are redeemably stupid and to those i say stay on your side of the fence. >> period! [cheers and applause] >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests. she's known as the bad girl in her bible study group. host of fox news sunday, shannon bream! [cheers and applause]. >> greg: he loves cooking his liberals medium rare, chef and restauranteur andrew gruel! [cheers and applause] >> greg: it's her eighth straight year being at the top of the naughty list. new york times best selling author and fox news contributor kat timpf! [cheers and applause]. >> greg: and he prefers to do his nut cracking year round. new york times best selling author, comedian and former nwa world champion tyrus! [chee [cheers and applause] >> kat: any number of things. >> tyrus: a nutcracker. >> greg: shannon, i'm sure
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you're a fan of chesterton. what is the whole purpose for a fence. why is there a fence at all. >> shannon: doesn't it feel like it's healthy to ask those questions everybody is going to push back at things they don't understand especially as a kid. i think about when i was like seven and one of my mom's pillars of western civilization was you could not eat ice cream for breakfast every day. i'm like why not. she was also a teacher at my school i'm not sending in a second grade tasmanian devil to embarrass me. also you don't want to end up op my 600 pound life. >> greg: i love how you condition that you don't want angry letters. >> shannon: i love that show, almost obsessed with it. but i'm asking why, why, why, why. if you are so dead set on an end result you can't even ask why something exists in the first place. >> greg: so you're arguing against fences. >> shannon: no, i'm asking you should at least ask why the fence is there before you get rid of it. >> greg: good point. way over my head shannon, as usual. andrew, so you work as a chef. are there, quote, metaphorical
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fences and walls you have to protect from absurd trends like what if someone said food doesn't necessarily have to taste good to be cooked and served. i mean they're doing that with insects >> andrew: that's a great question. food is racism. pizza right? let's take petes a classic italian pizza cheese, throw on pepperoni. one topping. now wove like pickled elephant nipple pizza coming from this woke pizzeria on the lower east side. also off topic to that question five seconds i realized what a horrible father i am because my kids had ice cream for breakfast today. >> shannon: i wish i was your kidman man they're probably out there ripping the fence apart right now out of the sugar high. i've said fence so many times after reading about chesterton theory, and i also want to smoke a chesterton. i also think this theory when you look at it at the reverse applies toss the federal government. i know the burden of proof lies
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with those who want to destroy the he knows if but the government has put the fences up and we have to remove some of the fences. when it comes to the morons on the street who are protesting for whatever reason they don't know or you understand, they have to get out of the way b you but when it comes to the government we have to remove some of the fences there because they're insignificant. >> greg: kat that's an interesting point. on one hand it's hard to prove whether your fence works because you never know the bad thing you caused because it didn't happen. but on the same respect on some fences you don't know if they're actually working at all >> kat: yeah, i think that -- nobody's doing anything about any fences. i think people just yell at each other. this fence is all your fault. there's not examination going on. but it would be helpful if there was, i think. like shannon your question is great. you should know why it's there, you should be thoughtfully considering it. but rather than thoughtfully considering anything people try to think why it's not their fault so they don't have to do anything. it's not your fault, if you
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don't consider it you don't realize you might be doing something wrong and you might need to change something about yourself. >> greg: if you look at every avenue of turmoil, tyrus, social discourse, history, crime, biology, the decline begins when believeius foundations are destroyed without asking why. >> tyrus: here's the thing. and obviously he's a brilliant man. but his theories are flawed. yeah, that's right, i'm saying it. >> greg: you're going after chesterton? >> tyrus: i'm going after chesterton and here's why. i'm looking at it from a street perspective, right? he has another -- several but one that stood out to me he has about a street lamp. street lamps in the middle of the city is light it's bright some people think it's too bright it is it needs to go and others think it's their light and they need it it all goes to looking to wisdom before you react. so there is a wise great man in charge of the fence, and when they go to the fence they ask i want to tear it down, they ask do you know why the fence is
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belt, no, go away and come back. with the street lamp it was a monk. but here's the thing, this new genre does not seek wisdom. they don't look to leadership. and they're being -- they're coming up with the understanding that i can attack, there's no consequences. there's no accountability so i don't give a damn what the fence was for. all i know it's in my way and i don't like it and we as a group, the group think tank, the mob, doesn't stop. they run the wise old man over. and lynch him and call him a racist and drag the fence around his neck. because no one seeks wisdom with these groups. when you bring this up with octo, they now the fence in gaza, they crossed it and that fence would protect them from israel, israel and vice versa. you rip the fence down and create a massacre, now the fence is down for them, too. >> greg: yes. >> tyrus: you never once thought, oh, hey, guess what's coming back.
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they didn't stop to ask the wise men before they do this what would happen. they would say israel's going to release hell on earth on you. they didn't care because the new way of the world is, there's no consequences. they went from monsters to heroes in a news cycle because no one soaks the wisdom anymore. that's problem with it. just put it out there [cheers and applause] >> greg: tyrus is fox's gk chesterton. all right, up next a senator hopes college deans shake in their boots by taxing their woke pursuits. nst rsv with arexvy. arexvy is a vaccine used to prevent lower respiratory disease from rsv in people 60 years and older. arexvy does not protect everyone and is not for those with severe allergic reactions to its ingredients. those with weakened immune systems may have a lower response to the vaccine. the most common side effects are injection site pain, fatigue, muscle pain, headache, and joint pain. i chose arexvy. rsv? make it arexvy.
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higher ed's coffers. senator ted cotton wants to tax multi billion dollars endowments to fund israel ukraine and border security. but like biden returning from a trip it looks dead on arrival. the 1.6% tax is part of the woken do youment security tax act and would raise more than $15 billion which if you do the mathis almost enough to cover hunter's monthly hooker bill. but respectfully, senator cotton, this seems like more of a political stunt. really, jerry nadler has a greater chance of being named sexiest man alive. wouldn't it be easier to just secure the border with the military and laws we already have? among the colleges he's targeting the action is of evil mit u-penn and harvard. full disclosure they all recruited me to play basketball. but you remember harvard, they're slightly to the left of antifa. according to the new york post
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they covered up a plainly rich of their president claudine gay and threatened to take the post to court over their probe. they threatened to camouflage i can like black paint over jesse's bald spot. harvard spent weeks to come clean about gay under investigation and only disclosed when they said the governing body stood by her in the wake of the anti-semitism mess. we could use some stone walling like that at the border. and when the post started digging around for evidence they got a 15-page letter from a high powered attorney who identified himself as defamation counsel for gad harvard. but upon closer review, the letter turned out to be 15 random pages from harry potter and the goblet of fire. andrew i want to ask you about the whole thing but first is there such thing as plagiarism in the cooking world? i'm curious because there has to be in your profession. do you actually find chefs that rip off other chefs. >> andrew: oh my gosh it happens
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all the time. i invented the chowder flies, hand cut fries smothered in clam chowder and every other seafood restaurant took it from there including red lobster but i don't have a team of lawyers to protect me if i did i would tell them to sue my selves. i might sue myself. we do it all the time. recipes are nothing but jazz standards weism vice. i don't want to get too deep let's make this funny, i'll cover myself in clam chowder. the thing about this story is i have no problem punishing these jello factories but you don't do it by taxing. you tax we tack they tax, that's how we get into this. we give $600 million a year to harvard university alone. just remove all that and make them use their own endowment money for it. punish them. >> greg: this what makes me nuts. i'm not for this tax. what do you think of the tax and why are they getting our tax money >> kat: i think it's a horrible idea. well, i always feel that way about taxes.
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but, yeah, calling it the woke tax, he's admitting that he's doing this because he doesn't like thing that those universities have expressed which i don't think the government should be -- i don't even think they're allowed to legally be punishing people for their speed and that's a really bad road to go down so i'm very, very against it. it would never go through anyway which i think is a good thing. i just can't believe you invented chowder fries. are you being serious. >> andrew: dead serious, cold winter night >> kat: from now i'm going to stand up when you enter the room. i love chowder fries. >> tyrus: i never had them. it's on my list though. you know, i don't -- you can't tax them because that's basically saying what you're doing is okay and you encourage them to do more. if you're serious you cut their federal funding aen then kids wouldn't get scholarships anymore to go to harvard. no, maybe it's time to go somewhere else. things change, harvard has become a buggy whip. because they've shown their
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faces and i wouldn't want my child going to a school like that, jewish or not, just in general because it depends, it could quickly switch to whomever they decide to go after. the bigger story in this is that, see, this is the thing with equity hires. you have to go all in with the equity hires. they knew about her plagiarism they probably helped her. she was probably hand picked. we see this with equity hires are usually extremely flawed, their only grace is that they look the part. and everyone else fills in the gaps for them because that's virtue signaling. so as long as they do the bidding of the people behind the scenes, they'll stand by them. once she decides to step out and say something off the cuff, then all of a sudden all the stuff will come out. that's the thing p equity hires because they're not stupid when they get in these positions they know they're given those positions and are given a task to do appear follow it to the letter because they're an equity higher. i tell me kids you don't want to be the equity hire.
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we need a big yellow guy on tuesday-friday to come in and make jokes, tyrus come in. you don't take that job. if they can't describe you physically but they can talk about your when it whit and how good you are at what you do. you want that job. she's the face of the problem. >> greg: right. >> tyrus: but she's not the brains of the outfit clearly she has to be told what to say >> kat: i love that show said i stand by the integrity of my scholarship. i'm going to use that all the time. why are your clothes on the bathroom floor? i stand by the integrity of my scholarship. >> greg: it's impossible to get a competent person if, a, you narrow the pool of applicants to only one type of person, and then you embolden them to think they would never be fired. they don't have to work very hard. she knew no one was going to educate radio her scholarship. she ticked the right boxes so they didn't even read her stuff. shannon what say you on this? >> shannon: well, first of all, i think it's often unfair to the
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person that you pick if you say ahead of time, this is my criteria, the president's done this a number of time, i'm going to pick an african-american woman to be on the supreme court. because even if they are truly the most qualified wonderful person in the world you'll have people always think was it a diversity appointment. not fair to that person especially if they're qualified. what i love in the middle of this trouble with this president, they're trying to hide eggs have, they threatened the new york post, feels like with this law firm it comes back to them, didn't they say in the report she forgot to add quotation marks and we'll go back and add them. every kid who as gotten kicked out of harvard should say that. i forgot my quotation marks i'll put them back in and we'll forget the plainly rim. >> tyrus: if she put quotation marks it would be at the beginning hello my name is, the rest -- she would have to quote the whole page, as jesse watters would say chunks and chunks. >> greg: the coverup is always worse than the crime. this reminds me what they did to the post of hunter biden. remember the 51 intel experts
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and the letter, in this case they're trying to suppress a story. and if this were going in a different direction, if it were righties doing this, this would be all over the place. >> shannon: and i find it really interesting that one of the woman who's come forward to say this is my work she stole is another african american female scholar, who happens to be a conservative and she says listen she stole my work it's not about race. >> tyrus: she's a conservative so she's not black and not qualified to run a school. >> greg: there you go. exactly. all right. i'm being sarcastic before when i said yes, right? up next on clinto.n fatigue hits the ivy league.ia somebody's poking directly on the nerve. i recommend sensodyne. sensodyne toothpaste goes inside the tooth and calms the nerve down. and my patients say you know doc, it really works. >> tech: cracked windshield on your new car? bring it to safelite. my customer was enjoying her new car, when her windshield cracked. [gasp] >> customer: my car!
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even more than an intern who -- eh, you know where this is going. but it's the smartest realization on campus since someone realized you could put vodka up your butt. thanks shannon. earlier this year, bill's worser half accepted a professorship at columbia teaching public affairs. meanwhile bill did offer to tutor the female students but columbia has a i no cigar policy. the left praised hillary for passing her wisdom onto the next generation everything from fraudulent land deals to pants suits. meanwhile they empowered one of delete e-mails destroy evidence and destroy libya. turns out the class is ego worshipping dribble in front of an audience. unlike her show on apple tv which was ego worshipping dribble without an audience.
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one described her first day as a sea of cameras, secret service personnel. sound like every time joe makes a boom boom. they're very happy when it happens. the student likened the experience to attending a late night talk show as opposed to an intimate college lecture. which isn't fair, hillary's way funnier than kimmel. but you know the class is bad when even left wing students rockly trashed it who then all mysteriously wound up dead. i guess hammers aren't just for smashing hard strives. but it's okay, she'll tell their families that it was suicide. oh, boy. wake up, people. all right, kat >> kat: yep. >> greg: you almost went to columbia >> kat: yep. >> greg: that's good enough for me. >> kat: yeah. i couldn't afford it. that's why i didn't go. >> greg: what do you make of the fact that they were just these stupid kids are actually disappointed and shocked?
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>> kat: no, no, no. i read this whole argue article that this student wrote and she is being ridiculous. she's saying she didn't do any office hours and she didn't grade our papers. and regardless of what you are your title is, did you really think hillary clinton was going to road your papers? i bet you like people have a hard time getting her to read the books that they write for her and put her name on them. like it's hillary clinton. you're being absolute -- this student thought she was going to like meet hillary clinton and they were going to like gal pal around town in the class. but i did it, actually when i was just an average variety garden variety food service employees because i was supposed to be at columbia and i couldn't afford it i watched red eye i was like if i could meet that little man he would love me and i could work for him. but i was right. it very rarely happens. >> greg: you were talking about eric sean >> kat: no i was talking about you. i would be so good on this show just get me in this room with
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this guy and you hired a weird food service fan. >> greg: that is true. that is true. you know, tyrus, she should have been teaching something useful that she knew, like a class on stain removal. >> tyrus: okay. that's not fair. we know that had she known how to do stain removal, they wouldn't have been in this in the first mris and that would have been made bill clinton the stupidest man in the world to bring home another woman's stained dress and ask his wife to clean it. >> greg: i'm glad you dissected that joke. >> tyrus: i just feel at some point someone has to say -- okay. like he did the right thing. i don't know what you're talking about. if you have any sense at all. listen, that poor girl. apparently she missed the trailer that is the hillary clinton show. if you thought all of a sudden that she was going to be this warm bubbly charisma, or as the kids say, risma, that she has
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never been in the classroom, like hey kids i'm so glad to be here. i'm still bitter about my marriage and the fact take i lost to donald trump, but, hey, everything else is going swimmingly for me. all my shows have been cancelled on netflix. i had a charity foundation and it's not around anymore. bill's still going golfing on the weekends without his clubs. but, hey, other than that, let's get some learning done. no. she literally comes in there and says hello class, which one of you whores is messaging my husband. i check my dms. we'll wait. class dismissed. >> greg: you know, shannon, she discouraged students from asking questions. that's some teacher. usually they want inquiz tiff
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students. >> shannon: i think everyone is being too hard on her because at least she showed up. remember president biden told us numerous times he taught at penn for four years. he did get a million dollars but the philadelphia inquirer does this thing like he never actually taught classes there. he gave some lectures and ticketed items and that kind of stuff. so, i mean, at least she came. maybe not for all of the classes, maybe not office hours. i can't imagine anybody thought she would be grading papers. how dare teaching assistants grade my papers i wanted to share my ideas with her >> kat: she thought they were going to brunch, that's on you. >> tyrus: of course she showed up to class, she has nowhere else to go. how many times can she go to the view in one week. >> greg: i wonder when she grades papers if she did she would just write, what difference does it make. benefit gazi call back. >> andrew: she writes you'll shoot your eye out. >> greg: do you think they took the class just so they could put it on their resume, like something that could open a door
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for them, i took hillary clinton's class. >> andrew: yeah but i think on their resume, too, it's like i worked for hillary clinton. that's the way they're written nowadays. the reason people are mad is because it's public affairs class. they all thought they could pick and choose which was a public a fair bill had or which was a private a fair. the class should have been two things she's good at disappearing people and losing. so how do you be a good loser. how do you cover a crime. that should be the class. because none of the people at columbia are going to be good leaders, they're all losers. >> greg: when they said they had these cameras there, this was content for another hillary show. and so the students were actually working for her. they were tricked into being an audience, much like these people here. we told you this was a hannity show. . >> tyrus: no football for you. [laughter] >> greg: all right. coming up, libs become unglued
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♪ all the streets are brown ♪ people are moving away ♪ things are only getting worse ♪ have something to say ♪ ♪ adam's california dreaming ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: yeah. he says things aren't so great in the 31st state and although he once dropped out of college, he's here to drop some serious knowledge. please welcome back the great actor comedian and podcaster adam carolla! [cheers and applause] >> greg: so, adam, we've got a lot to cover so let me get right to it. starting next year california schools will be required to teach kids media literacy to help them delve skills in identifying misinformation online. now, do you think when newsom signed this into law he even realized that he himself is
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guilty of retweeting fake news himself? >> adam: no. and it's rich having california, who got everything wrong about covid, all misinformation, all disinformation about covid, now wants to tell us how to ingest facts in media. it's like hiring brian stelter as a personal trainer. bad idea. >> greg: you know, i saw a picture of him. i think he's lost a little weight. >> adam: well, the camera -- oh, no tcamera adds weight. >> greg: but he hasn't been on camera. that explains it. he lost his job so he lost like 20 pounds. there you go. so california has like the lowest literacy rate in the country, and they're going to try to put this, integrate this into english, science and math and history classes. they don't even teach that stuff anymore.
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so why are they focusing on media literacy instead of the basic requirements for human life? >> adam: because that's what california, and especially la, does. they have a homeless problem, they have a drug problem, they have housing problems. they have a school problem. and then they want to pass a bill to outlaw the rodeo from coming to town. they pick little miniature problems that make you think you're living in a decent society, and ignore all the major problems. that's what california does. that's what newsom does. that's what he does with every piece of legislation, he takes little problems that make you feel like you're out of big problems and focuses on them. >> greg: he has it easy because california's like a super model just naturally beautiful. so he doesn't have to work that hard and all he has to do is kind of like do his nails because everybody's going to stay there for the oceans and the weather. it's not fair.
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all right. next topic. this weekend president biden wrapped up a fund raising tour in hollywood where top tickets for one event went to close to a million bucks. did you get an invite from the president to this one? >> adam: no, i missed it. but i heard biden got confused and thought tom cruise was ted cruz and had him shot. [laughter] >> adam: these guys, they come into town, they rattle the can. la has a bad enough traffic problem already and they shut down the whole city with their motorcade while they drive to barbara streisand's house or whoopi goldberg's condo or wherever it is they're going, jane fonda's house. here's my plan not to shut up to the city. have the fundraiser at the airport. park air force one in a hanger, invite all your celebrities to show up. if i have them a tour of air
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force one, and then you don't have to shut down the city that's already in gridlock. >> greg: that's a great idea. they should do that for everything. like have the un in new york meet at the airport. they just never have to leave. you just hustle them into one room, they get their whores and their free food and then they go back. sorry shannon. that's a word from the bible shannon. >> shannon: it's whore mongers in the bible. >> greg: whore mongers. yes >> adam: anyone. >> greg: go ahead >> adam:ists going to say every celebrity's been to every other celebrity's house it's no pig deal but you could go on air force one and get fiesta mix from the president. >> greg: exactly. it's going to take more than money to get him reelected though. is this just a waste of money for these people? >> adam: i assume it's a waste of money for these people because i don't think he's going to get reelected and i don't
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think he's ever going to be able to hammer those checks. but, yeah, hollywood loses wasting money. >> greg: that is true. last topic, california pre schools are reportedly struggling with a law that bans expulsions because everyone is misbehaving. but they said it will mitigate the preschool to prison pipeline. is a issue? the preschool to prison pipeline? i never heard that before >> adam: it's the only pipeline biden hasn't been able to shut down. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> greg: how's everything else in california adam? things are cooking? you having a good time? >> adam: oh, it's great. seriously on the preschool to prison pipeline, you could go
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upside a teacher's head with a folding chair like hacksaw jim duggen but if you misgendered a kid you would be expelled for a hate crime. >> greg: that is true. all right, we've got to roll adam. thank you so much. see you soon. where can people see you perform next >> adam: go to adam carolla.com for the alex villanueva shows live shows. >> greg: your podcast is amazing one of the first podcasts ever. you always have great guests. so thanks adam. all right, up next, has hollywood lost its loyalty to ungrateful royalty? ♪ in 99% of people over 50. it's lying dormant, waiting... and could reactivate. shingles strikes as a painful, blistering rash that can last for weeks.
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♪ >> a story in five words ♪ >> greg: hollywood's biggest losers, royal jerks. all right shannon, if that's your real name, the hollywood reporter put harry and meghan, we don't even use their last names now, because we don't know them. what's prince harry's last name. nobody? windsor. >> tyrus: royal.
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>> greg: they put them on their biggest losers list citing their whiney netflix documentary whiney bying ongraphy and inert podcast. you're always so nice shannon, that's what everybody believes anyway, can you trash these grifters for being trashy grifters. >> shannon: here's my thing they had a $20 million teal with spotify to do a podcast and spotify parted ways am i canably and they parted because because they couldn't think of a podcast. for $20 million i'm going to think of something. >> tyrus: i have eight in my mind right now. >> shannon: i will a call my mom and talk p something. the problem is they don't want to talk about what people want to hear about. if you've been a royal people want to hear what that was like. if they talk about the royals they say it was awful and they didn't want to do it. i watch enough hallmark movies to know the prince is the by you want. not the former prince. the current prince. we want the details and stuff they don't want to talk about
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now. >> greg: kat i heard you're part of a text messaging group called the meghan markle fan club. why is it called that? >> kat: wait, it is a true. because she's the worst. >> greg: she is the worst >> kat: i think she paid to put them on this list because it gives them what they want more than anything which is something new to complain about. like they're mean. they're not going to look at this and say maybe we should make changes, they're like we're puig bullied again. >> greg: they're the internal victims. serious question tyrus, why did meghan chop off his balls? >> tyrus: 'cause she could. i don't know, greg, i don't want to get into the intricacies of what's going down below with two of the most uninteresting people. they're the royalty d teams. even if there was a mass murder of the generations he's three
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generations out. he married someone who only married him because he could be, when she said could you be king he said maybe. he left out -- which guys do, we tend to fluff our resume a little bit trying to impress the woman he's trying to get. he knew she only liked the finer things in life and he was like you're a prince you could be king one day prince? and he's like uh-huh. yeah. and the first day when he went to sit at the pig boy number two chair they were like no, no, you're down there windsor, earl of mediocrity get down there. she was like what is this you told me you were going to be king. no, the bald one can be king. the optics are just, you know, just ughh. and she stands if front of him and he sits there. she wrote that book about his life, never asked him a question. so nobody cares. you come to america and you bomb on netflix.
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that's hard to do. >> greg: yes, this he throw money at anything. >> tyrus: they literally have a show called water where it's just ocean coming in. >> greg: god. >> tyrus: i'm on episode 8 of that, phenomenal. >> greg: i would just pee all night. andrew, they left the cushieest job on work appear they came here looking for a cushie job where they didn't have to work. >> andrew: that's all it is. first of all the fire mace has a higher rating. i was on food network and judged an episode of chop jr. with meghan. >> greg: oh really. >> andrew: and she was the nicest person in the world. a week later she was communicating with my wife they were texting, a week later she starts dating the grilled cheese sandwich and she lost my wife's contact and suddenly turned into this mop sister. so i take responsibility for
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what's come of this relationship. and why are we still talking about this poop show. as they had to do was take their 50 to a hundred million dollars give out free meals in los angeles they would be the royal mr. beast and your life would be just so rewarding. >> greg: they just wanted fake virtue signaling. they had charities but they didn't do anything with it. >> tyrus: no, greg, he promised her he would be king. >> greg: all right. maybe he was just jesting. oh, stop it. no charity laughs. don't go away, we'll be right back. retinol overnight means... the smoothing benefits of retinol. are now for your whole body. plus, fast-working crepe corrector diminishes wrinkled skin in just two days. gold bond. champion your skin. my active psoriatic arthritis can make me feel like i'm losing my rhythm. with skyrizi to treat my skin and joints, i'm getting into my groove. ♪(uplifting music)♪ along with significantly clearer skin... skyrizi helps me move with less joint pain,
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