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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  December 30, 2023 12:00am-1:00am PST

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with jacuzzi, you can get a safer, easy entry shower to keep you feeling comfortable and independent at home. your new jacuzzi bath or shower is waiting now is the best time to call. we're waiving all installation costs with no interest and no payments for one year. go to jacuzzi, bath remodel .com or call 800 348286, seven. >> call now and never leave the spa. unfortunately, that is all theth time we have left this evening i want to thank sean hannity and his entire team and is itire t to thank you. we have a new year coming up. everything is possibleeaw . can do this together. don't you doubt that? be sure to check out my column at a mac dot us. have a great weekend.
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hello, america. i'm jimmy fallon, the king locke of late night. >> greg gutfeld is out. and that's a good thing becaus,e would totally trash this jacket from my overweight figure skater collection like, listen, folks, greg bashes my wardrobe a lot. but in my defense, unlike greg, i can't borrow clothes from peter dinklage. jimmy. >> anyway, we have a great show for you tonight with a. but before we get to them, it is friday. now, the normal tradition on gutfeld is that we'd open with leftovers. but seeing as it's the last episod leftov the e of 2023, the produe agreed to let me share my final thoughts on the year. >> if it's okay with you
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people. final thoughts now.. >> to be honest, 2023 was a bit of a dumpster fire, but it did teach us a lot things. , for instance, but why taught us that this was not what customers meant when they asked the bartender for a beer with some nut some s nut >> so silly. yeah. the mulvaney story turned the of beers into the rodney king of beers. >> but the craziest part, as they gave mulvaney a commemorative can to celebrate one year of womanhood. >> so technically speaking, were giving beer to a one-year-old girl. >> not sure that's what alcohol ads meant by drink responsibly, but here we are. don lemon taught us it's possible to so bad that even cnn will fire lemon, iff yo you remember, got into hot water after saying nikkipa
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haley was past your prime. stfirst off, anyone who tells you women over 50 or past their prime has never seen they're nevery. but don lemon, dude, you endorsed kamala harris. rris >> we'll ask your opinion. women, once we get oj's takeur o pinion marriage shaming taylor swift and travis kelsey taught that it's still legaltill l to like white people. >> go figure. who knew? a thi >> who knew?ng we're still thing. sure. the mayor of boston had a christmas party where no whitf bostonstmas pa ne people . but as racist moves go, the boston mayor. is it like a fir e? >> live on a scale of oner. to harvard? >> yeah. harvard's president, quoting, came unders pres after failing to condemn anti-semitism in a disastrous appearance beforesast congress. on the plus side, now we know why she plagiarized the restrous of her speecheplagiaris, althouh
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in her defense, she didn't think she could write them herself. because as a hamas supporter, she didn't know women were allowed in libraries. oh. oh, okay. how can we have security? lookat at thgronere grown ups ot one. the pro-hamas recipients, that joke. not something i budgeted for. as for taylor and travis, thoughjoke,., i do get it. this couple is everywhere and a lot of football fans are annoyed that they keep showing taylor at all the games. >> but you got to admit, it's nice to see someone pretending be a cheat.to s >> besides, thisee lady shimmy o silly pro-palestinian protesters taught us that you don't have to be smart to get into an ivy league toe. bt check this out. seriously, if there was any doubt about how dumb these protestersw prote were, it alli out the window when they confronted alec baldwinenen about ending the bombings in gaza. eartdih protesters. alec baldwin couldn't get a cease fire obaldwin own movie s
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thdoubt he's going to calm things down in the middle east. you know what i'm sayingeast, ?g with all due respect to the shooting star, anyway. speaking of movies, bahrain wasr the big winner at the box at officethe this year, raking in $1.4 billion worldwide. >> how about it.ecause republicans loved it because margot robbie is a smoke show. let's be honest. while liberals love going to the theater because they finally found a way to be surrounded by underage withoutwe flying all the way to epstein island, could coincidentally. ee >> this is interesting. barbara brought in more money at the box office than any film since titanic, which continued shatter records this year, though.
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jimmy so just everybody is going to be okay. there's no wayng to be any of yo rich enough to know people on that sub. so relax. >> but while we're talking monebut y, we should mention that eight 2023 saw a florida man when the biggest megans millions jackpot in history. at $1.6 billion. $1.6ottery officials say the man trying to remain anonymous and he set up an llcup in delaware to hide the mone ay as you'd imagine, he's reaching out to the experts on hiding i'm e. n delawaring out so silly. our and >> yeah, it wasn't exactly a banner year in politics. donald trump became the firstesn president to be criminally indicted and joe biden became, the first president to make a sign language interpreter, bide theg. rprete r now, true story at the state of the union. his second to last line was.no now is the time to choose between unitw isy and shrugging
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of having to having to hav ae that. and it's a state of the union. so they all clap. but if you want to sign language she goes from signingse to like google because she's like, i know what this meanr goes d s.i don' like, come to think of it, itme might have the sign language interpreters, cocaine at the white house. after all thatinters coc. as for trump, looking back on the historic day of his h indictment, if we're being honest, the most shocking part of his flight to new yorkt ,seeing a president make it up the steps of the plane and one try and finally, 20, 23 taught us that literally anyone can write a book. out i'm going to get us out of this mess. shut umep and. just when you thought the bar couldn't get any lower. now, let's get real for a minute. >> you should buy cat's book because she's profoundly talentedshe's prted she . >> she's a bestselling author. she sells out stand up shows all over the country. you want sho to know why you shh buy my book for real? just so you can see how out
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of place iow oplace t on the fos books website. go t go to that site you're goig to see, the first book is like woannon bream womet n of the bible speak harris faulkner faith can move mountainsme. >> jimmy fallon. a on a guy in my cab. i don't know what it's doing there, but by a check it out. yeah. 20, 23 was the type of crazy story that you couldn't make up unless you were santos. k you got to hit the republicans kids. that's how comedy works. >> now, the house of representatives voted to expelthe hous the holocaust v turned astronaut and let's be clear, though, like santos lied way too much. >> like, you know, it's bad when lauren boebert saysba, ou you're yanking our chain. wahlberg famously got caught fondling a man's privates in a u denver movie theater. republicans were upset that she
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performed a ps act in public.li. democrats were angry that she didn't show the video to kindergarten kidsho kids. >> coincidentally, boehner did it during a screening. beetlejuice, which is not ifactly the show in town. if you don't believe me, you've never seen what beetlejuice looks like y. >> me. and finally, a tip, the cap to new jersey senator bob menendez, who showed go that it really is possible to get the gold bars outld of nigeria. >> now, millions of americans have received spam emails over the year s and come up empty, but not menendez. and sure, he was criminally indicted afterwarde heallys, bue hasn't been forced to resign because of 2023. taught us anythingsi. it's that liberals have nomen problem with men going for the gold as long as they take asn every year.tonigh
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all right, let's get thet'e wo pundits. the wine should be the nicestul box on the shelfshel. fox news anchor julie banderas in the house.s like he's a kick ass comedian and looks like the guy hunter buys fro tm comedian jim florentine . he always kills on stage and not just because he looks like a civil war general. actor and standup comedian tyler fisher and her new year's resolution is to be so awesome.g "new york times" bestselling author and fox news contributor, captain of th authe peter ryanan. all right. so, julie, we covered a lot there. when you look back 2023, if someone gave this to you as a gift, would you keep it or you re gift it? >> i would read gift like to an anemy, you know, like you don't give 20 23 to anyone you have any respect foyor it? probably.
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i'd give it to my ex-husband. but 2023 is the fruitcake of years. i di >>g. st wan >> yeah. i liked the don lemon story, though. i just want to address that. hay calling nikki haley o actually out of her prime. he's past his prime. i just wanted to put that on the record. and that's what that out of the way? well, i feel like it needed to be said. yeah. great to. yeah. florentine. as a nationally touring comedian , people like to say b this is like the best time to be a comic because there's so much stupid stuff going on. but is it actually the opposite? because it's almost hard to keep up with ridiculousness. it is. and then people are afraid >>re at something, especially with the bud light stuff. >> yeah. this crowd, give them credit.crt i know. oh, my god. no , you cannot offend this crowd. we tried everythin g. people at home don't know this. we opened by clubbing a baby seal. pene cluthey even know hit him . actually wrote that the only thing they were offended by was you saying i was a bad writer was a. and, you know, i didn't mean.
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i love all of you. come over after. yeah. aftebarrett , you should. if you guys like math, you love this party. but it is a fun way.t it classy. but it is. it's a stupi is,upid timd time . it is like if i made a joke about bud light up, i saidg? some in a front stringer. >> bud light of the comedy show. i go, you, you, you, you need to tell me something. >> you might as well get out of the open right now to just like, oh, say that now.. as a comedian, tyler though, aren't you thankful for the decision making process of the parent companhey? >> tran heizer? bush tran heizer. but. well, you know what? big think they made a big mistake. barbie made a big mistake. they should have had dylan they sh mulvany play barbie because he's 90% plastic at this pointey . right. they could have saved money. he could have played barbie and ca coun. right. called it barb and hammer. i don't then they only play it on the gaza strip and they don't let old white women in. n ind have. combined it all into one. i'm savingmbin to ted didn't dyn mulvaney kind of destroy
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gender pay gap and that he was a man for 27 years. no one knew who he was. >> he was a woman for a year. he made 10 million bucksur and. >> so i wasn't as into talking about the film or anything. it's whatever. it doesn't matter. however, i think thing, chos it's interesting that they chose that they wanted to have a trans person for their ad. they chosee,have rson, you know, a male to female trans person and not the other way around female . lv yeah, they could have done like for a hundred days are beinge a bro like it's a brody brand like white. and as a woman who was born branman and is still extremely brody, i don't know why i would miss out on an opportunity like that or other people because it's like nobody who i ls happy is drinking blood. >> like now it's true. .. ardless of gender but that's what i think these brands screw up. it's they try to placate the people tryth who don't actually partake in what they're doing. >> isn't that so stupid? wellthey're doing an, that thath the marketing was actually said that like we want she did a podcast where she said she
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was trying to turn she thoughtcs the consumer that chose the product was disgusting. yeah, but also it was all about businesse producit was. she never at any point said, i really actually care about trans people. soll businesses are businesses.b >> their aim is to make money.us so that shouldn't be shockinin, >> what's shocking to me is when people think businesses care about you, oh yeah, they don't car when bue at they all that. alt. >> ont great poin but i do a break into o our commercial break. didn't didn't disney of learnyoe that message like you're supposed to do what makes you money like people g supto mo to disney bece they like rides they want to pay $32 for a turkey legeg and marvel at the fat people on scooters. isn't that why you g o? >> yeah, but like, no one was waiting in line three hours to go on snow white, a seven inches. >> you know what i'm saying? so do you thin do k. that's >> this was the year g florentine. that's going to kind of scare companies straight. i think so.r that i think after bud light then, because it's still dow bn like 25%. i love going to the liquor store and just go in the bee25 e section and seeing a bud light stack to the ceiling and the corona bs down here. i love seeing that.
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that's great. it's got to hurt your feelings as a bud light, because i'll tell you this, the thing that hurt me the most, j.p., my car once got stolen in the city myen and i in , and if you live? city, you're like, just once. really? my car, once cart g sold in th. they threw my cd out of the tape player like, were like, i'm stealing your car, but i'm not a dirt bag. i'm not going to listedirtn to jimi's color. me bad summer mi color mx 92 ano they ditch my music. why would anyone want to steal6 a toyota camry? well, it's if things went on in that camry, as you know,gave had a former new york city cab driver, i've had thousands of women in my back seat. technically speaking. anyway, on that mediocre splasha . >> before we go, a quick reminder, my new book, the cancel cultureck dictionaryt comes out january 30th. it is an a-z guide on how how to take back some fun in ourto woke world. so don't take ba to preorder yol now. look at me, folks. i p i get. the hel the and up next, the plan to keep trump off the ballot is a subtle is a mallet, if you like. john. we've got not one john,
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boom. oh girl, here it is. >> they're rigging the ballotg in maine to sabotage trump's campaign. >> yes, they are. on thursday, maine secretary of state shayna bellows removed former president trump from bell, ate's primary ballot proving that stephen king isn't their biggest lefty idiot. >>ry ballo the move, along witha similar one by the colorado thpreme court, is expected be ruled on by the u.s. supreme court in the coming weeks, as sooe n as judge kavanaughjudge finishes his game of beer pong and last night, bellows acknowledge she's in rare territory here while defendingra her decision. >> check it out. i am so mindfurewhile del and is in my decision that it is no secretary of state has ever deprived presidential candidate of ballot access based on on section three of the 14th amendment. but noe 14th presidential candie
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has ever engaged in insurrection and disqualified under section three of the 14th amendment. >> oh, no, you didn'd under sec >> oh, come on. translatio.n that clip. >> we've seen biden's poll numbers and we don't believe him when he says he can beat. >> president reaga n. jimmy but not all states t are getting caught up in the call to remove trump from the primary ballots. >> efforts in minnesota and michigan were unsuccessful. and on thursday, california certified the list of candidates, which does include trump. >> oddly , on the california ballot, these men and they're not as shriveled as joe and bernie are florentine. >> i come to you first.firs you kindt. do look like a guyt' who stormed the capitol, let's be honest, which i lovbee you. thank you. you're my buddy. but this is so brazenly political. >> and the reason i say
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that he's not criminally being charged with insurrection. you want to know why? because you can't overthrow the government if you're the guy in charge of the the guy government. >> at the time he was president, was he overthrowing himsel f? s he and i thought you had to be found guilty of something in this country first. >> yeah. no, no, no, it's not. okay,n says it, so cn was an insurrection, so that means he's guilty. >> yeah. nos he. your absurd. and the thing is, again, to your point, because poasn't ged ord, convicted of this crime, this is the equivalent of removing him from the ballot fo tr, something he did in your dream. you know what i'm saying? it's like there's no there's a thin didg to it. and even gavin newsom, who,drne you know, said, no, this is illegalwsom wd to be on the, that's a glare. just gavin newsom coming out gat and that. yeah, thank you, j.b. that's california, a state that was so liberal. they wante>> that d to defund tp in the village people. >> okay. so is this is this not proof? is this not proof that this just a partisan move, just a political kneecapping? >> i actuall?y it's great. it actually applies to my
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regular life. like any time i meets somebody in person, it's guilty until proven innocenrson it't and tru. >> and you have to prove to me that you're innocent. and so i guess that'you're is ts what's happening with trump. >> i've never been a juror before either. but if i ever was a juror, i think that this would set an awful precedent, quite frankly, because you're right, he's never been convicted. he was never even charged with insurrection. so it's not up to democratic t leaders, the senators and the governors, to make decisionshe as to whether or not he's been convicted or not of something that he was never actually chargedconvic for on. it is purely political. and ted cruz put it perfectly when he said that is openings bo a pandora's box. and if, god forbid, a republicanx an governor out t were to come forward and say, we want to take joe biden off of the ballosay take joet, whato you think would happen? >> oh, yeah. no, it would be . i mean, it would outla ?w people.d, yeah, people that would not be allowed. it would never get to the supremver gehee court. the fact the supreme court has to deal with this b.s. with all the other that's on under this government is ridiculous. >> i'm with j.b.. kat, let me ask you this. okay? the argument here is they're
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trying to save democracy, right, by destroying democracy. is this not the equivalent of mise? >> your house from an arsonist by burning it down? kindhouse fra and, you know. yeah, i.. it's also one of these. trump is a rich, powerful person with a hot wife. >> and like millions of peoplede who are just devoted and love him. >> and with stuff like thivo love hims, managed to then to somehow turn that guy into a victim. >> yeah, i think that's the one card he should not able to play right. >> it with. >> they also know how much he loves to get up there at these rallies and talk about al al the that the system is against him. right. i mean do they not knodo thewt d that that's clearly history. they just added so much more timd sohis e to hisse set. and there's no way, obviously,y as everyonobe said that this is constitutional, that there's any legal justification for
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this. i mean, it's obviously absurd that they're saying that to do it for democracy. i think that forre doingfor dec we're going to remove you. that's the only to vote for this one person to save democracy. it's all absurave d. >> but i don't. can he be unhappy about that? i doubt it he's probably like, yes, more, you know, how did he not see that at this point? and now it's a great idea. and tyler, i've been doing himbt a favor by taking him off the ballot, man, because nobody wants to campaign in maine. >> let's be honest. e >> it's also funny because everyone in maine, just like me and my funnyme friend, have what i like to call wresting january 6 face off bunch of lobstermen. oh, right.fr >> no, it's -- it's it's more free press. he loves it. right. they'd givenee lov ey've billions in press. billions in free press. >> right. and now all the other of the napublicans, they're all saying they're going to take their names off the ballot. >> vivek right. vives,k ramaswamy.
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>> ramesh which sounds like a delicious indian dish, right? >> i love the ramaswamy and more press that say, you can't say that. you can't say that, sir. you can't say that. >> just said it just it lovesou'r it. >> you're trump impression is so good. you're now on a government watch liste trump imprso now . they're now monitoring my texts, tweets. i think newsom said that because he wasn't going to win california anyway. yeah t know, i think he got somehow get the homeless about that. he win by 20 million votes. but itit is tr is right and kate this point it's just more ammo he so new york intentionally trump likes this. >> oh i think he absolutely loves it. honestly k mean he was on truth social this afternoon tweeting what do you call it true thingtg i don't know but anyway he loved it. i mean i do follow him and he absolutely loves it. and, you know, the morabsolueeya people start to come down on maga and trump, the more popularto come r he gets. yeah. biden is literally handing him
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the presidency. the amount of bashing that he does on trump. needfeds to worry about himsel and like just walking upstairs and like walking off stadium podiums and so forth like that and just like remembering how read i do card. >> i, i just love the idea that this is, is material for trump. because if you've ever covered a trump rally, as i pive, they are the new rocky horror picture shows in that everyone therect, every wordigh to the whole show like they'll be like, bro, we can't gbroker,o the bathroom. they're about to do lock her up, you know? yeahomy're abop,, he back after up next, his colleagues said he's not allowed to show that he's well in doubt. hey, hey, hey. the time is now. okay, here we go. it's your last chance to sign up during fox nation's once a year sale. this offer won't last and it's chance to start streaming our biggest show. i'm rob lowe. this is liberty or death. boston tea party with the biggest stars perfect just perfect and your fox favorites
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the school's president said in a statement, quote, in recent days, we learned of specific conduct by dr. gail that is subjected the university significant reputational harm. his actions were abhorrent, whic.s wereh is a fancy way of g we're mad because he didn't invite us to the . >> but unlike his video participants, the chancellor isn't taking this lying down. hey girl, claiming this is a free speech issuspeeche, pointit that legal consensual with your wife doesn't violate any university. >> so should he be out of a job or is there something can do to get a better grade? listen to the who gotthe that joke right away. you were some of you are like, what does he mean? i don't get it. >> tyler. i come to you first. you look like the lead in a called the civil war. ,the blue and the. i only make that joke because the question i wanted to ask you is if this was not straight, is there any way
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they would fire him? no. if it wasn't straight, hi. utely notld fire >> absolutely not. and it's also funny that now you can get fired quicker fororg doing than for supporting a a that jews. was li >> and i thought maybe if itke was like a hamas themed, they wouldn't have got fired. you know, they're all wearing the cover. maybe they maybe it would be called something like from the river to therom the . m i'm not sure. but that's just that's just an idea. that's just an idea. wei >>rd how does it not weird, though, that a liberal college doesn't wantt ral coll doing, but liberals want prof watching . >> you know, it was the weird the weirdest thing about this story as i had to research it at work with my search history. if i'm doing this show, it's just absurd. nathan t >> jonathan turley wrote about legal preciselout ity he did.tiy and he thinks that he could potentially have a cas hse e on grounds of the first amendment. that it is it is it is a public
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university iuniv. so he has the right to freely express himself. and i agre express e that honestly, hones there is a lot more disgusting happening on college campuses than a man banging his own wife. >> i think that could because it could it necessarily he can make a lot of money off that case. maybe he wins. on thahe probably is going to gt a lot more people to sign up for his only fan.theys, all this publicity. this might be the best thing that ever happened the to this guy. and now all. it all depends if he had some sort of morality clause in his contract. . >> but i mean, it's just he clearly wasn't trying to hide it. wasn't to advertised for it o. he he didn't just want people to watch about with his wife. >> he needed people to watchex to feel like he got what he wanted. in som hise. >> jay, i come to you.o okay.yo u.should if you're a college that's charging someone miquarter of $1,000,000 for a gender studies degree, should you be lecturing us onll, screwing anyone? >> you kno lng w, probably not.b
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probably not. i thought he was sweet, though.i . >> i mean, you know,ed t they're married and they're havinghey ar. >> i mean, i think that's inspirational for all the would be brides grooms out there. outt happy to sleep with your spousht . he's not having an affair. he's having with his wife. i think he's actually a role model, quite frankly, considering most model the profs and presidents of universities nowadays. he is actually an exemplary example of what you should be about. >> you should want to grow up to be when you are a married man. married that's probably why because the vote to oust him was unanimous. >> that's probably why everyone else is like honor and miserable. their home. heating exactly. their husbands are cheating. emare just not into her because she gained weight. >> but she. they and she's not skinny many. >> so he's banging her even after that baby, we're just saying i think he's a good man
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. i'm not condemning the chevy chase. look at me. okay. florentine. what? between you and me. perc okay. what percentage of the tv audience when we said it, wisconsien of the e n put out a , do you think? looked it up right away. 90% write it easily, because this is what i wanted to askwhen you whenever you read. this is why i feel bad for porn stars. whenever they're in the news for , no one reads past the first line of the sentence like they could have die d. o you're looking up a video within 30 seconds, are they not? and then you have this wholesec over debate over what do i do now w that i'm watching the video? because they are dea id right. >> i just know, like i'veey always wondered, where am i going to send my kid to college? this . der if is the college i would send them. this guy sounds like he's cool. he take a class, amateur one on one, but supposedly had the article. he already stepped down before they fired up. is that true? yeah, that's what it said.he so. oh, i didn't. we don't. yeah, he already said that because we don't actually read the article. >> we just look at the video. because judging by the video, it was not his decision to pull out. >> by e video,
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but. >>ll, look, he stepped down from his positio ln. >> which no one know. the position was doggy style. ' but here's the thing. i'll go back to you, ty. okay? it isn'to yo i don't wanna say a tradition, but it's very cliche that college professorsdt do hook up with students. so that's just the thing. we've known that forever. i mean it's in the movie animal house like it is the donald sutherland character. but is is this more about the fact that he put it online? like what would you attribute it to? i mean, where was i when w they were hookinas g with the students? >> yeah, i'm too short, you know, if i was fat and by l the way, you can lose weight, you can't gain height. >> se o just want to say it's harder to be short than fat. but -- but no, i mean, if itent was with a student, everybody would be goingev to college. >> yeah, that's true. i think he should do one videoo with a studentone vi and admisss would be sky high. me and gym would be, you know, applying next month. well, we'd be storming the place. well, if >> w i mean, as someone who has been saddled with student debt, it is nic be
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survivor. when you call right now. when you call right now. your gifts h to help save lives. >> this is what god wants hear us just feed the hungry. fi i'm asking you to act nonaw. >> do it when it's on your heart and pray that they'll know in their final months that they're not alone. yeah, you're watching mailing it in home. welcome to mailing it in a gutter ball turkey. >> it's a real name. kind of all turkey asks, would you rather have the superpower to read minds or become invisible this year? >> katherine timpf. hmm. i don't know how to become how e at homtoine.visi e, i just put a cross on, like, out there, and then i don't think i could handle reading ha you.ike why would you want to know what other people are thinking? the a cursss that seem a curse.
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yeah. you know, it takes the, like, the spontaneity out g. everythine sp well, and also, you know, when i say, like, are you mad at me s want t ? >> i don't really want to know if you're mad at me. i want you to just tell me n i o is spoiling the ending. >> i like. yeah. tyler reminder become invisible book. i as a straight white male. in today's society, people tellb what they think right to your face. they go, you're a racist piece of . yeahleight whie in y people telo so i. yeah, i think i wouldn't. >> i don't need that.be i want to be invisible. yeah. you know, i want to be invisible. see what peopl invisib and e say about you once. >> and then you don't have to have friends anymore. you don't have to buy any christmas. and you know why? you know, i like my quarantine know why invisible or a mind reader. >> a mind reader. because then i'll know ieader.f my mad at me or not you're mine. i never know. >> oh, there, you know. no, i don't know. oh, is it really eve?n in one of those one of those, you know, you know. >> and then i'll know if she's in the mood kind of allsed around because i don't know that either. you knowon. >> i didn't go with
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your girlfriend. she was coming in the bathroom in a newspaper on their ar.m like, you want to get you know, there's like, no, you know, i thought what i if i read herd about. >> i, you know, she's obviously but i think with a lot of your girlfriends, it depends on whether or not they have homework that daot they y. true love right. you not love you that the best. >> i'll help them so i can, you know where there is bad time. ead mind >> j.d. read minds are becoming oh i don't get it. >> what's on somebody's minds? absolutely not. don't care. no ab you don't even want to know what goes through my mind half the time. so i certainly don't want to knothme sw. >> others are thinking, no. well, and i don't really care know the mind reading thing is interesting, but i like i like the guessing like as a loth t. my life is instinctive. like when i was a cab driver or a comedian, you're trying to gaugere tryin the audienceudienc is thinking the invisible thing. >> i don't know if i wanted to be invisible thinking. e. >>e i'd be hosting the show on cnn right now , but let me so random bright eyes asks, did you ever have a job that you
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hated when you had it? >> but nowd, you're glad to havd the survive whole story? >> we'll go round this way. jb oh, yeah, give it a go. i worked as a concession lastnis at a movie theater on friday nights in high school. i had no iool, i dates, but i d a hairnet and i served popcorn and sodaserved so yeah, and i'md to tell that story. i'm also proud to work were als at a bakery that i was fired from and another pharmacy that i was fired from because i was f i used to let my friends shoplift. i was so popular l then becausee everybody got free beer on the weekends. so something to keep in.s. >> next time she's on faulkner focus going. liberals don't arrest anybody. i was never caught a good job. never thought i gofot caughtcusi flaunting what was the bad gigt working like a distraction job just picking up stuff on a construction side. i always work like a really bad jowo b to motivate me to dolittle comedies like always, like so i'd bring a little notepad me and notice why i don't want to do it the rest of my life. yeah. so i'd helelp me write jokesout and get out of that. so i always took the worst job ever and thaoft of boss was, you know, mean to me. i'd take us back a block and to
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do a number to it wasd do right next to him on the construction site and he woul number in it d it's funny. what else are you goinwhg do? >> well, you know, know. i know. i get it. i think it's hilarious. but talk about the job that you hated and i used to do with my lacrosse coach, and i learned. >> i learned so much. yeahith my. canvas used to be a canvasser, you know, so those guys that come up to yose u, like, canve the you save the whales or whatever the hell we're doing now? >> ws and so i would get phon numbers and then i realized that it was good for getting i women's phone numbers. i still do the same thing. i go, you want to save the whales? i get the number and then i text them when i ask them out. >> is that true? yeah. lls, you guess if they're saving the turtle, they're saving whales. you're probably not going to get laid. >> well, those are the women i'm dating in brooklyn. dat timpf was there a job? so i didti, like, phone a thon telemarketing for one week. i was a reallylemarket bad at ie i kept asking them i mf they wee
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mad at me. say, >> yes, mr. johnson, you have to go. i'd be like, but why? what did i d they do what i do wrong? it became more about me than anything but mine was definitely cab driving. >> i know. i bring it up all the time,g, bt but it like, really is like, define who i am. but the thing about cab driving that i thi s so insane is thatet i people get into your cab and they knontw they're never gv going to see you again. so they give you all of theire conspiracy theories and porkor chop recipes and you're just trapped in the car. you have to take it when. barack obama got elected president. i had a woman get it my can't penn station on the eighthpresid avenue cab line. and she's like, you know, the president's in al qaedenana right. >> and i was like, ma'am, t i drive a taxi in new york city. i know most of al qaedaxi york pretty sure is not in it anyway, . up next, can sharing coffee together help a marriage through stormy weather? it team up and lose weight together with nutrisystem and now with new and seven,
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something extraordinary is in sight. i hope you get me anything this holiday season. not, but thanks and escape to the best of british tv. >> a story in five words. . hey girl. coffee. check in. saves marriages. jim florentine. i come to you first. a relationshipco expert saystak that taking time to have coffee with your spouse to and check in before you start the day actually saved their marriage d >> do you wish you knew this? before we got divorced, i would quit drinking coffee. every
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>> i don't want to talk about it every day. like in the article, it says you need to talkda the arttalk r goals for the week. i have no goals for the week. yeah, it's the same as last week for . you know, i agree with you there on the one thing you not like. nobody wants to sit there and listen to the other person talkthere the oth about their d of the day. >> now imagine you have to start with itend ofe , right? you're half asleep. you're not even awake yet. and me? what else can we do? itn we do later in the day whet straight talk? >> wouldn't you argue that maybe there's a better beverage to share if you're trying to save and spice up the relationshie to p in cof? >> yeah, maybe like a shot of tequila or something, you know, you take a shot, go. everything's fine. yeah, but yeah fi >> coffee?ne i mean, what worse drink you're talking about saving y marriage, maybe like preventing adultery. and then you both have to run off for explosivoue pre diarrhea. re >> you know, let's saym the you're texting on the toilet. it's one way to cut down on the adultery. that's a good poin t, katherine. >> timpf, do you and the hamster open day with aee
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coffee chat? >> when i drink coffee, i do c,a but it's really bad for my anxiety. so i don't think he really wants to talfor my k to me, when i'm drinking coffee, this is like i'm not going to be okay. >> and als o it like that groundbreaking that you should talk to your husband for 5 minuteshs. more i talked to him like more than 5 minutes. is that weird? yeah t minutes, , according to . >> yeah. it's like she's like the way to make your marriag, yee work is you actually should speak to her once a day y. once times the day just falling apart. we were just. and then we started talking for 5 minutes every day, basically what i learned from this article is the author's husband hates her. >> you know, he didn't want to talk to jp. what is the best drink to your day with not coffee. you're going to talk to me in the morning., kahlua orhor's bailey's in the coffee might get me to actually acknowledgehn you. but this is worse than like, kissing in the morning before you brush your teeth. it's disgustin to ackndge g. st >> and i can't stand mornings. i can't actually stand when people say good morninan g. just yeah, people that know me just say not morning. and i don'
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t like when people look at me or talk to me in the morning. so certainly coffee talk is not going to wor so ceisk for me. tk >> no. i always think when i see these studies morning, whenever there's pushing a product like the product will save marriage. it's brought to uspr by like the university of starbucks, you know, like, do you think this is a real study iversityf is some woman said, no, you know, because supposedly su to get to get divorced. but then she said, if we talk for ry mornir 5 minutes every m, that helped us connect. yeah. you know. yes, that's a scam. >> and you would you agree with that? that would lead me to divorce >> id to, to my wife for 5 minutes every morning about the same thingthat wou the me leave you skipping town, you know. >> you know how that went. she shared her grievances for 4 minutes and 58 seconds and it goes, yeah, sounds good. >> yeah. gallery refund i mean offer a perfect out do go away. we'll be right back. the time is now. >> okay, here we go. it's your last chance to sign up during fox nation's once
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a year sale. >> this offer won't last. and it's your chance. start streaming our biggest show. i'm rob lowe, and this is liberty or death. boston tea party with the biggest stars. perfect. just perfect. and your fox favorites every day. start streaming fox nation now for just 1999 a year. your last chance to lock in our exclusive sign up today i am the whole package. >> what's better than one john to night your early
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john larroquette how about a hero and just man who constantly does heroic things and jon cryer lying is what parents need to do to build trust to john our better than what i live to serve the people that you hate, the people now more than ever. check your local. >> do you have federal student loans? if you do, you're making payments again. it's hard saying goodbye to that much every month. but by refinancing to a lower rate through credible com, you could drastically cut your monthly payments. at credible get personalized rates from multiple lenders so it's easy to. find the refi that puts the most cash back in your pocket and what extra cash is well extra see what could save on your federal student loans. visit credible .com .com. >> ready? ready. let's talk 81 contestants come
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81 categories. space desert. i love moving into trivia. it ultimately one survives. terminator. jerry maguire passed. let's light it up from the creators of the books. and big brother. he's the most epic game show ever. who will conquer the floor. rob lowe hosts the from the house this tuesday on fox. saturday, the biggest game at the fox rock time boots, big ten, big 12, clash of late and a five day take on west virginia. who's thought leads the buckeyes as they look to lock up a huge win on a big state game believed in by the mountaineers. their sights set on an upset exclamation point. ohio state, west virginia saturday seven eastern on fox. saturday seven eastern on fox. >> the biggest games are all fox prime time bootsyo. your camping buddy luke
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is ready. >> dude, i thought you were driving. driving. i you were driving? >> oh, i never said i was ou driving. high j drive if you're high. just don't drive. it's illegal everywhere. if you feel different, you different. >> important announcement regarding the dangerous herbicide paraquat. if you or someone you love has developed parkinson's disease or parkinson's like symptoms after being exposed to paraquat calls saddle rock legal group. now you may be eligible for a substantial financial compensation. the dangerous chemical paraquat is used as a commercial and agricultural herbicide spray. many users were exposed this toxic chemical through airborne contact with skin and clothing. it is found in many popular weed killers like remark zone. it is highly toxic. the environmental protection agency classifies it as restricted only, and it is banned in many countries worldwide. so if or a loved one develop
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parkinson's disease after working or living on a farm that used herbicides contain the deadly chemical, paraquat can settle like legal good today to see if you qualify for financial compensation. it takes a few minutes and the call is completely free calling to discuss your case. >> now call one 880 79797. that's 1-800- 8279797. final thoughts, tyler? >> oh, yes.and-up i'll be doing standup comedy in san diego january 10th. that's hot. yeah. and then i'll be all over florida. denveri'll be er all over the c. go to tyler fisher .com. all the dates are there january. >> ten going to be so great. w we're making comedy funny again. that's what we're doing. that's greaty t's what and january 10th is a good month to be in california because it's the one month of the year where they indoors. >> so it's actually nice. i plannenth of thed that my age. what's up with your quote florentine final fin thoughts.
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>> january fifth, they'll be at the dead island theater. >> i jersey.ial in new? oh, that's which. i don't know where that is. it's probably near a costco or somethin g. i starbucks. oh, man i'm heading to idahoma falls march 1st. >> and it's a it's a hard gigrc to gett's a ha because my gps keeps telling me to fire my agent. come on, you're mad at this, jb excited for 2024. i am. i have no gigs. i'm just going to be a mom. >>m, it up unpaid. >> okay. and kat timpf, you're just going to be a kick bestselling author and i'm going to i'm going to have more dates next year. >> i'm not there yet, but i have like a bunch of sweet merch on my website. >> i'll give it to me. yeahe ch, the kat timpf .com ho. love it, go there. but guys by multiple copies of all of it because none o of that's going to fit me. ras,j thank you to julie banderas jim florentine, tyler fisher. katherine animorentineerd i stud fox news. in light of this our, i'm jim failla. and on behalf of greg gutfeld, i love you

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