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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  February 29, 2024 12:00am-1:00am PST

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hour. the step counter to keep track of what you've accomplished, the longer motion track for more leg movement and the comfort remote control operators are already taking calls. so hurry and be one of the first 300 callers. >> don't let this opportunity pass you by. hurry and call now. >> donald trump, sean hannity and from our southern border. as the migrant crisis continues to spiral of control, the former president is breaking down leadership failures and america needs to do now. sean's exclusive from texas thursday only on hannity. >> all right. >>wck programming note tomorro we will be at shelby park eagle inte, texas, to interview former president donald trump at the border about the border crisis. governor greg abbott, ted cruz will be with us as well. that's all the timhave left. please set your dvr. in the meantime, letting out left. your heartbeat trouble. >> greg gutfeld put a smile on your face meantimt be.
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me all my fault.fault. all right, all right. all righ t. happy wednesday, everybody. so tomorrow, both president joes biden and former president donald trump heaidendt to the texas border to duke ito out on america's current migrandut crisis. the sad part is only one of them will know wherely one he i the other will think he's on a beach in delaware during cinco de mayo. s part the biden's part, this, is only the second time he's been to the border during his presidencyn to . the other time it was to pick up a package for a hunter marked baby powdera pa. "baby >> of course, trump has beenght] to the border numerous times and it's obvious why he's been talking about it for years. it just tookor years for everyoe to catch up. the truth is that trump that terribleto catch dragging vulgae
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who are chattering classes love to hatrriblee, has once again sn that he has the pulse of america far better than is ea opponent who at this point may not have a pulse himself. pulse and i know too far or far enough. sure, trump's a billionaire, but in the end, he's a guysureau who ketchup on a steaks. joe puts ketchup on his pancakes thinkinghe they're steaks. >> trump cared the border before it was cool. >> now dems are copying him. re' i'm willing to bet biden is going to show up in an orange wig with stormy danielss his arm. >> but unlike the elites trump has know shon along that e border is a big issue to most americans, that in an ending wave of migrants that are less vetted than a harvard president isn't a dream. >> it's a nightmare. so as we gear up as w forat the showdown at the southern border, trump's got the home field advantagumpe. because he was there first when it was patriotic and nothe political. and who is pouncing now because it's political? as bouncbiden. took th
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for joe and those propping him up, it took the death of a young woman before they were forced to book flights to el pasolights t. he's like all of us at harassment training, pretendingn care. >> meanwhile, the media accuses those who forctie issue of seizing the republicans, obviously seizinwhg this horrifc tragedy at the university of georgia. they're seizing on thi tras, an example of biden's failure to protect the american people and to secure os the border. >> riley's death ignited a political firestorm, stating house speaker john burns indicating that the georgia house this week will take stepps on illegal immigration, as if the initial facts were not horrifying enough or the sense loss not deep enough by now.h by and all of it has now been compounded by the revelation the suspect was in this country unlawfully and hows in thi quic. >> that fact became politicized. sot became solemn. well, are we seizing? right we are. aren't you seizing?are. >> anderson still hung over from those shots on new year's eve. a young woman had her life stolen. and as the arrest paperwork
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shows in the most brutal way possible. >> it shouldn't happen. >> the story isn't that we're seizing on it. it's that the media misses ieiz time. the only way they react to the real news is if we shove it shoe back into their faces or, in their words, seizbacke, which is the new pounce. >> and when they use that term, it means, the stop. you're humiliating us. and that's worse for them than actually the story. >> and the stories like this keep coming. that week in maryland, an illegal was busted in connection to the murder of a two-year-old bobustedy last month, an illegal shot at cops here in new yorklast m and an il honduran man has been arrested for a 14 year old at knife point. so i guess we'd better not seize that. remember how the ap said lincoln riley's murder was evidence of the dangerseviden of running alone? maybe that's how they'llcee danr these stories, too. that killing a child highlights the riske storieling a c having. a cop's murder highlightsa the benefits of defunding teen highlights the risk of puberty. it's all the same logic.c tr
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it's trying to live in a free society that makes us at fault. so yeah, the dems and thecy legacy media are on the.yo sure, you can all get together at the white house correspondents dinnel ger and. laugh about trump's hair. but don't you realize your day is donon't youe. >> the legacy media is like a former star high school quarterbactar highk who now seli for a living. except unlikvie al, their gloryr days were never glorious to begin with. >> today, those no longer set begn the national agenda. wyou. and like that crazy, you keepex going back to donaldke. always has. and it's not so much that today's border showsborder that trump was right all along. it shows that you, america werel right all along. n> no one ever voted for ope borders, and neither partyy su supports it. trump was just willing to listepporp wan. fact is, biden's willful blindness on the border strikesa americans as far more vulgar than anything trump has vulg anything. now, if you remember, it wasem trump whber, is trumo said backu
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that we have some bad arm race here and we're going to gempt them out. it was that that the left was willing pounce on because it was racist, xenophobic. it also, it turns out common sense. and like so many of his ou, he kept this one, too, by rounding up ms13 members in long island. but the dems still can't get over trump's rhetoric, and he also presses can feelings of illegals. here's the live mayor of athens, georgia, addressing lincoln riley's murder. >> today, i want to say that we center our work hereorgia, a in athens-clarke county and people's humanity and partth of everybody's humanity is the expectation of human dignity. while 2019 was not that longyo ago, you might remember the dynamic we were living in in the late teens in this country, where you had, tates sp the president of the united states, speaking in the most vile terms about peopleo we who were foreign born. anu had that notion metastasizing. >> how do you say swipe
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in spanish? did the mayor forget, he was there to focus on a young woman's heinous murder at the hands of someone who shouldn't been here in the first place? >> and all he could do wasshou focus on trump'sldn'ace? most v terms. >> not that long agofocus, you trump's words? >> trump's words mayd have always been elegantly phrased like that one, but he's honest tha b and relevant to the actual lives of americans. >> and i livf the polls are any judge. >> americans want the aubrey who's been willing to seize all along rather than the guy who needed bad polling numbers to finally wake him up from a drooling slumber. o seizso as hopalong joe limps n town thursday to try to fix a crisisg to that he creatednowl and now blames on republicans, it's no surprise that many texanst is are saying too littlt too late. we need a new sheriff in towtln and one with a gun in his holster, not a melted soft serv e. not >> let's welcome guess he gets a standing whenever he cancels
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a show. actor, writer and comedian j.b.e lasalle. he knows free speech like i know a beacow h. campus reform higher education bill. nicholas giordano, raccoons complaints. r tr he's been going through their trash. "new york times" best selling author and fox news contributor go llingt to. and when he gives you a piecehi of his mind, it gets delivered on forklift. "new york times" best selling author, comedian and former nwa world champion"new y tyrus. world but a big i just raise the roof . >> always a pleasure to see you. and i mean it this time. i didn't write thi reg: jamie, alwao see yos. te ti okay. jamie, can you relate to trump and biden visitings the andvisi to you visiting your kids who were taken away vi you hadthing elseou in life by your ex-wife, leaving you as a sad and broken comedian ? >> alaska completely. yes wow. >> that was right on the nose.
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is it? oh, did you do the last thingwh you showed where biden wasbind i in ice cream. >> i was looking and i was like, i don't know if we can say definitively n't kn that that how is ice cream because that's how they serve him all his food. sand it's that to like a baloney sandwich. i saw a clip the other day. dy s >> he said to somebody goes, hey, can i get an extra straw for my steakays, canw for ? and i hope when trump becomes president, he builds the wall. >> while joe biden is in mexicso . so trump went to jus yto -- l on likcoe pouncing on stories. we talk about things when tragedies happen. that's why it comes up. it's not yeah. necessarily politicizing but. and of coursng it.e trump's when they report trump's going to eagle pass, biden is going bide. wnsvilleo eagle which i have a feeling that every time biden doesn't get up in the morning, i gsn't e to the bathroom. he wakes up in brownsville. yeah, nicely done. shall we stop there? nick, i always love
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how whenever there is a any kind of political issuever theel hear a democrat or a liberal say, we need to have a conversationwe . it's good that we have a conversation. but then when you actually have an opinioe a but n on a conversation, they accuse you of pouncing. you. >> yeah, well, they try the i and turn the issue around. i mean, the media is soullesssi that's what they've become. they're more angry with the fact that they gotwith thefact t trying to sweep the murder under the rug. and now they havee to report it's an illegal immigrant who shouldn't have been in this country than they are of the actual murder of an american.er and it really shows you whereic thisan shows y country has gonei we have political officials that have completely abandoned american people and they should be held accountable. their policies are destroyingtry the united states. i adversary's got to sit back watchiningthadversarg us i. and i just wish that the formert president tomorrow will actuallhemer presy just shs in brownsville instead. at the same time, biden's thert ,they roll out to podiums and they just have a debate on illegal immigration. legal im right.
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>> the border. it'll be genius idea paper deal back that that's an amazing because if biden refuses to debate all trump has to do is go to places that represent issue so he could go to a supermarket about inflation. well he's great at trolling. he should do it. yeah, exactly. and it causes it cause joe to have to show up and then they'll have to debate. that's great. i'm glad. i though that cauhen they m t of this.glad i thank you, greta. we'll everything you said out and help ted. i said it can. >> do you think the only reason why biden is going is because trump ise onlying is b. yes. so, okay, so i do have analogy.y yes. joe biden is a guy who doesn't like he's doesn't really want to commit, doesn't want to get married. and trump is all of hiss' girlfriend's friends because all of his girlfriend's friends are getting married and she can only be like a smiling onl bridesmaid at so many of those weddings before she goes crazyea
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. >> yes, the champagne toast here is going to be nothing compared to the snotast is n ing sobbing meltdown in the hotel room after every single wedding. >> so eventuallyin a hasll to propose. we have to do like something. i know this. i act. this is actually true one guy was going through this, and so he gave his girlfriend an engagementy has tos actualg thrt to buy. >> to trley to buy him some tim. >> no. you want to hear the worst part? she accepted it. it. she waited around more ande then they actually got married,h and then can you guys believe he cheated on her engagement bracelet? yeah. that's going to be a thing[laur] now, huh? >> oh, that's the sort of the story ended differentl.y. hen he it's in a game. g and then he got his moneyght wo together and he got meul a beautiful ring. now, what happened? they got married. he divorce, and she was stuck with a bracelet. probably not going to be. >> it's an impending doom game. to be fair, he got one. impending doom? yes. one fan in the crowd. and i. thanks for comin thewdg deb.u fh >> i get what you finish the show. tyrus, what do you think joe is
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going to do at the border? and whatdorder, are the odds ofm maybe not showing up? what is joe biden going to dingo at the border? see, i'm not really good at impressions, but i got a prettol good idea. three things will happen. he'll rocket walk the wrong way or fac run oe the wrong side ofe fence because he will be standing in front of a fence. yes. and it will be the cleanest, woautiful brown. if i was the mayor of any city i'd be wanting, i would ratheryy have coming to my city to speak on the border because nothing is going to after the speech, but it's going to be queen. >> you're going to be queen. t it's going to be gorgeous. trump's going to go downe the roadwill b. people there's going to be all these people and fans and supporters that show up later. ns bugs and his balloons. it'll be confetti and itit'll bl be this magnificent thing. and they'll be the electric bill for the city is going to be off the wall, the plugged in cameras, the people showing up. and he's up, and he's actually going tos in an area which is heavily trafficked h by illegal crossin. so there might be some actione e you ca an.
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i'm willing to say he'll be up there like that's a this one right now. we're going there." >> so we're going to picture him when i get in. picture i'm getting you know, it's going to be something like that. when ibut again, i never betterg everything up. you came on here. we're all trump. and first of all, yes,we are ato ugly thing of it, i think, is that conservatives aren'ts cn against people coming to this country. we're against people coming illegally. there's word there's another magic word, illega there isl and invasion. poun's issue. >> housing is new there. there's always a new term pouncing on something catchy to do the things that going to eat. yeahgs they g now is pouncing m when one network decides to tell the real truth on something and the other network was didn't want to you're pouncing't wan you're picking stories it is i don't want to get into the horribleness of the story, but it's not pouncing. but s and.tg the new maybe if they gotback back to anderson cooper, supposed to be a newsman -ander but instead all we hear
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his opinions. >> jake tapper, who someon opine i respected and would argue and make the news, man, i can't make that argument't because they're so busy. they're so bought into like are you want to say if this is the way we want o our country to runur, we break a few eggs, guys. yeah, we break a few eggs. yeah few egg, it's egg to us american people. i think like cnn has invente d you e what it is called the cnn face. have you ever noticed sevee the cnn face is just a look of like, hmm, yeah, it's wrestling cnn face. yeah, it's not a fac e it's a wrestling disappointed face. >> and every res all of them do a variation of that invented that. ht,derson cooper right. up next, a club that can't take a joke if the comic isn't woke.e >>ns everybody, one super straight, super white teeth. a smile new sensodyne clinical away rights to shades whiter teeth and 24/7 sensitivity
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they told comics to skedaddleb n at a club in seattle. pretty good, huh i speak of a comedy club that canceled upcoming performances of four comedians that apparently they deemed problematic, seatt leaving seattle residents furious because this gives them four fewer victimsleresident ro. >> the list includes louiee seen gomez and three guys you've seen on this very show. kurt metzgeris smith and jim. florentine. so what exactly was the club's issue issue besides the fact that their only pronouns are he, him and hi s? an email sent to the comics cited discussions with local lol comedians in neighborhood groups and reads in part, quote, capitol hill is known for its progressive valuesapitoe and we've received significant feedback expressing concerns recenificantt of these upcoming shows with the neighborhood neighborhoods ethoborhoos. this this feedback includes concerns from local advocacy groups that are f deeply embedded in our
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community and work towards . lding itits values so they were concerned about aligning with their neighborhood ethosh their . and what neighborhood is that? well, the club is locatelld around the corner fromor the former capitol hill autonomous zonner fr e, or chaz, which i'm pretty certain latin fory a . remember that communist paradise, since the area where. there were violent activists took oveer that r during the sur of 2020, the summer of love. it was a sitee, multiple shootings, two deaths, arson and alleged sexual assaults. le imagine the gaza strip, but with more human, it costses city millions in damages. but yeah, thank god they're protecting from unwashed comics. the only thing they'll assault is your precious feelings. so to sum it all up, these guys are banned becauseto sumup, thed actually funny. and you can't have that in a woke environment where crime is preferable to comedy. they prefer criminals killing
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on the streets, not comedy. comedians killing on stage. which is why they wanted to get jamie list out. but he was busy babysittino g his kids because his ex-wife was on a date with a hotter looking gu y. mm-hmm. >> facts can get.laughs >> okay, let's. i'm theorizing here that the]m . knew who they were hiring. >> they knew these people. soe people canceled it.nd not because they found out about the comedians they had to cancel because they were threatened. right. what's goingwe . they just did these guyses the biggest favor they could have ever possiblye the big. if you look, i didn't even know who any of these people are. i. i can't imagine anything better for their careers than anythin get a cancellation happening to them. right. i mean, likeo. yeah, like luis gomez and dave smith. yeah. waitl fans of theirdcast, podcast, legion of " find out
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that people think they're offensive. and like, it's so absurd. and really the buzzword there more than anything is local comedians. >> as in people who go to open mikes and are not and are very upset. not sosuccessful much at the cot of what these guys are saying, but at the facbutt that they are not as successful as they are. right. i think that's what so much of this stuf i if is rooted in.n beco okay. well, maybe if i can't become a nationally known comedian, i can takeme nawn comed one down.n." >> but really, what you did is you really you lifted them? >> yeah. yeah. i didn't think that it was like the . cal comedy>> greg:n't thin and what are they like? yeah, it's. oh, i know exactly what they c mean. om the ones that people do like, they come to the stage and the first thing we have to do, everybody write the pronouns on a piece of papeeverybode pron that there's a pattern paperl er and a number two pencil with a special eraser in case you're triggered by rubberrigg um, has that front. and then we'll begin. the show.
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problem is, that takes an hour and 45 minutes because, you know, trying to think listen, i think the club at first i looked at this and i got and i actually wrote on twitter, i firede on until jim pointed stuff. so do what i do. and i have a perfect exampleepst >> last week when i with an. i thank you, but not yet. hold it steady. last week i was in andover, massachusetteek i was, and i did 5000 seats sol, sold out and who was like 200 200 people wanted to come in standing. it was crazy. because 40 milesub away, a club in boston said, well, our community is this and we're just not reall, ouy s" >> tavis is a good fit. and the only thing i said wahins find me the closest club closed to it. yeah, and we didthat that.m was and my advice to them was do the same thing, find a club you for get together because my agent up and mynt, my wife does it all for me. so and i w wherever i wante to and they should do the same thing and you get wathy
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more money anyways if you do it yourself, trust me. but they need to dtheyothe po that because the point is, let them have it. han't theyin ? say i the only other thing i was going to say is the crime is so bae isd there.siness the club is already on its way of going out of business because of comedians. mm-hmm. are they telling the guys don't come because they're afraiors de getting burned down? that's the the other side of it. that's why i never o mad ati sa the club. i say, okay, cool. thank you.th asank yok me? something close to them. just to make the point. i'll make the poinmake a pt. ta but it also could be that they're like they're scared to do anything becausered of nop from law enforcement, no help from the government. , theyarand they're bringing the four guys and they're getting threats. and this is they've been living in theen living inep]. they livt >> so maybe don't take it so personally. this but like, you know what? w maybe this was just the thingys. for all four of those guys and every one of those guys can book an event and get people to come. >> yeah. you knowk an epeople to come, wy >> it is pretty interesting, nicholas, that like no comics torched a business or attacked a police station or rioted
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in the no go zone. but they're the ones that, well, is why comedy isn't funny anymore. you have these comed y clubs that want to go, whoa, nobody wants to pay for virtue signalinog. he new i don't know who needs to heare that. just turn on the news or go into a college classroom. to it all the time. yeah. and the thing is, it used to bee that conservatives were the uptight ones, but you look at the numbers now, a poll just came out today where a third of americans think that freedom of speech goes tooh far.we l and then if we look at the ageoo groups, 16 to 29 over 50%0% bel believe it goes toieo far. so they're the uptight ones. comedy, you've got to pushuptigs the envelope. >> there is no boundaries. it's all about free speech. i grew u all abo p in era of eddie murphy and richard pryor, george carlin was eight years old. you had to watch what your parents watched on tv back then. watched v back tthey didn't coth you just watched it and that laugh. and that's what made a it fun. now we have what we have you. we have jimmy. we have chappelle. i meane , when we look at it, that order, there's tyrus,
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of course. i mean, when. looking at it,whey those that push the boundaries ,the ones that way. yeah, they're the ones that are funny. they're the ones that are bringing in the crowds and brinn th. ss becau hopefully this comedy club does go out of business because of it. i think jamie this is a perfect. stunt for you. >> yeah. the next time one of your shows gets canceled, which is probably tomorrow. yeahed. say that it was over. threats over. you're too hot to handlet to material. >> yeah. just yesterday, they canceled the show, and it because no one was coming, and i was like, the five of us are out of here. and ifivew myself with that.e r i was so upset when this storyyt came out. i called the clu b. i go, could i work there? and i wai wos sork jealous, tho. you're right. care cat is. so when i saw the story,, all fo all four of those guys are incredible comics. ofible all four of those guys are hilarious. and if you are big with neighborhood groupou are bs andn mic hours, i guarantee you are not funny. yeah, i guarantee you're not funny ifcersi you're favorite. of those guys. but when i saw this, i was so jealous because let's say bu.sa was that people don't hear this, this unwelcomey
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comedy. p >> i know so many people that googled and youtubed, all these guys today, they didnted t the absolute opposite of what they wanted to do. and that makes me happy for all theso de guys. i think they did book a club down the road. i think it's the tulsa comedoadi club. i was there maybe four weeks. it was sold out, just massiv oue got all fans and packed the place. so i'm happy for that comedy club where they're doing mas pack the right thing and i'm done with all sensitive, but i just did. college, i s a college. , an i said i'd never do this everd o again. and i it was like it was like,na good money. so i got hired at this college and before the show, this girl comes up and she goes, here's a list of the things you can't talk about. and i am not you. dropp >> iedf you had dropped her list t, they wereis the same. i'm like, but i'm happy with these guys. it's not a big deal for them, but i'll have for. all right, well, then i'm happy for you, jamie, right? yeah. . >> t you should be.yr i am. you should be. is it a wonderful relationship go anywhere but stand up to him. and we talked about this guy.
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you're not divorced. lose your guy anymore. g thro yeah, you're happily rebounding. guy didn't do it. yeahug. i feel like my parents are fighting black parents.rent all right, ws?e got to move on now. black history month. am i not alone tonight? it's almost. yeah, we've got an extra day and clap. g: all right, up next, bradeat musi th wonka didn'tos deliver asthma. it can make you miss out on those epic hikes with friends. step back out there with placenta is an mo add treatment for eosinophilic asthma that is taken oncst an y eight weeks. >> the center helps prevent getb attacks. ns lowe attack in the first year. the center is proven to helpr. the center is proven to helpr. you breath get back to doing day to day activities and center helpsic ra lower the use of oral steroids. lower the use of oral steroids. the centerct is for sudden
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feel the love. >> everyone's fallen head over de a portable blender. brunswick gives you ice brunswick gives you ice crushingli on the go so you can whip up and shakes and frozen cocktails wherever you are. recharge quickly with any usb port and even cleans itself. we said romance is dead. go to plan jet.com and take advantage of our valentine's sale to prepare to bag. wonka's magic turned out to be tragic. this chocolate factory was unsatisfactory. outrage in glasgow, glasgow. glasgow. glasgow, scotland tonight afterh families paid 44 bucks a ticket to what they thought was going to be an out of thisatgoing to n wonka experience. but it was anything but noceit d
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wonka chocolate experience had billed itself as a fantasy lik e never before where you can capture the enchantment. but trusenchant me, when someone promises a fantasy like never before, don't you bu like ney i? i'm still healing from kudlow's slip and slide. there there was no sliisp n slide, jut a jar. y. okay. oh, yes. it was also supposed to beo be featuring an enchanted garden with giant sweets, vibrantiant blooms, and magical surprises. which is the same language kilmeade uses to get people tobr his vaian kin. >> they also promoted their imagination lab with mind expandintheyg projections and optical marvels and a twilight tunnel with enigmatic sounds in a dimly lit passage. v which reminds me, i'm overdue for a colonoscopery, but there was none of that. but d, got a dingy warehouse to look at that looks more a molester hideaway, not a chocolate factory.
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this place so seedy, even cat won't stay there for longer, than six months. >> seriously, look at that. , it that place isn't even suitable enough to house migrants. 's i've seen crack dens that have more ambiance. there's a fe sw and absolutely no candy coated magic whatsoever.. ther and there's an anemic rainbow, some dime stor ae wall, a few candy canes and lollipops and some toadstools. not an umpire. loompa in sight. well, except for this sad looking, orange faced little on which he's not even a little person. and what's it cooking? madness? i'm not sure. i don't think those are bonbons in those beakers. >> anyway, the entire thing was i doy, t and the compan. the candy con, apologized and promised full refund apos. but it was so bad, apparently,tl that these scottish parenty,s actually called the cops. i believe i believe we have tha t one one tape.
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911.>> what's your emergency? yeah, i'm out the wonka chocolate experience, and it'st obsolete. i was like, gobstopper, sir, calm down. how can i stay calm when there's a complete lack of tailn talk? don't us giving life lessons in the for e lem song. i paid £35 plus i expect there to be freaking elevator that goes sideways and slouches and always i'm back with itan squared away. sir, is it any other way? d anr as i can think of?s isn' this isn't really a police matter. the chocolat ae river aren't evn a wee bit short. it's literal. these people should be behind bars. walkabouts. maybe you have some of this come up. just please. it was a jok wone. >> i'm someone. you don't get . don't come back because
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you have kids. >> is there any lesson here fo r parents? i wish i could have taken my kids today. i mean, the life lessonsen my in this for such a cheap price, you get to teach themki about discipline, man. the yeah, but, you know, in life, expectations don't match, and they have to handle real world situations. they also get th real-e lesson on the buyer beware. >> so i look at the lee positivs of this as opposed to the negativity. and let's face it, today, pares the parents, they cottle their children too much. their all to these horrible events that we have to bring our kids through. weof they to have to suffer th. so why can't we take our kids to an event where they have to be disappointedevent whe? is >> i think this works all around. yes. crush their innocenc all ad. e. xactly >> exactly. you know, i do have an experience with the polar expres experiens. right. but i paid a lot of money for it. do not track back, paid for the train. >> yeah, i paid for that. i was. s mad.ad >> we said nothing. we had already read the bookd to at home. raised
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i was like, yeah, my kids are having a good time because i raised them for the thing, man. i'm cutting it. i'm going, yeah, i wani would so this. they would have a black bugatti. look, rainbow, go, go, run. they would have tore it up. like, go. i that didn't go outside. smoke doesn't look like it. won't take a really bad art museum. >> tyrus: looks like events we have to go to when we. i grew up poor, brok broke.e, wd to the fair. yeah. and then you went and you paid it extra money to go seethe exmo headless cow that was jumping and frolicking in the water. and it's in a jar. you don't amount. yeah. the two headed baby, the mermaid thing that clearly e was so but we just watching all this and it was like they had one really huge but by today's standards she's not that big anymore. but back in the day now, shel had to get two jobs. she got to be the big girl. and and it was lady it was the guy walking around, said he was the world's strongest mad t n, but i was bie than him. so i was like, i don't believe this guy, you know? anand then you had a guythey are
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who was like, they showed they looked up the curtain and they like, look, crack head. yeah, yeah. and unfortunately, greg stayed and el a little too longnd inv and investigated and saw the crack haesd it smoking cigarettes, which then led to why that monologue made so sense. you got a lot out. yeah. that was greg's childhoothat grd in between the stuff, guys. all that stuff that was being said. i hope that i got, you know, you can find that crazy man. >> and yetaz it was the allenton county fair side show andwhat they would have a guy who is hn this is what happens when you're on drugs and i caught him on a smokeyou're and he was absolutely normal. >> do that for a refund. yeabsolutes. there's $2.50. jamie, you're used to disappointingre! children. yeah. mhm. >> i think he made a great point. they kind of got missed a moment ago that they could have jus >> jamie a gott pretended this was a modern art exhibit. yes. a mright. >> because you can't mock art. art. you would just have to go like, yost have they have, they shou have changed it. and i'm with everyone else on the panel sveryono far.
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i don't mind that at all because i judge every experience with my children as like, how long is this going to take? >> yeah. jeremy like if we walk into one, they go, i love it here. i'm like, oh no, it's going to be ours. this we're talking like a minute going less. we're going to be in and out. and i would have just claimed if i was in charge of this, i woulid been like, no, no, this is based on the wonka movie. >> yets they. tim burton one, they should have changed the movie and said no, this is some other movie or this cat. they could have said like this is a medical exhibit burtoreg: s you're inside a giant stomach, starving. yeai hibit.s, i actually i disagree with everyone. i'm on these parents side. in first of all, this happened in scotland. so if you grow up in a culture, we have to put on if you grew ut and stockings just to play your interview. >> i feel like, oh might be a little sensitive to people not committing to the thing. >> yeathh. and then also, speaking of,is se i saw this video on twitter that changed my mind. i think we have it. we pull this outaktwitteaw this . >> this is unbelievable. what does that look?
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what is that? soocolate and live in the walls all day. so i go every day and i realizsl these people weren't just disappointed. they might have actually thought they were going to die. yeah, like to are you hiding. something to a holographic experience here in this empty warehousyou're i e with, like, this thing that's coming out, lunging at children? oh, you're not going to. i mean, this is like that was unnecessary. this should they should turn this into, lik ture, a movie ths so bad. it's good. yeah. goode this could be a hit. the worst traveling ever, i believe woe, the working acto, described it as this is where dreams go to die. yeah. all right. we got to move on. coming up, he thought estrogen this deal ismoney buddiecos chick get help reachik your goals with jpmorgan wealth d small. the digital moneyd see coach in the chase mobile aphop use it to set and track your goals big and small
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this is an amazing story. a metal band called your rona cut ties cut tie its lead singer he admits to lacing his bandmates drinksto with estrogen to make him more feminine. woulhen he, by comparison, would look more manly and steali his buddies fiancee from him. meanwhile, the victim lost muscl weight experienced muscle fatigue, got stomach ulcers. do you buy this story to keep going on? he grew. ret think he drew personal. >> well, they were little ones. he was, you know, genetic. she wasn't that good. but this is a heinous, horriblee . estrogen like this. and i know wants to be ableitchw to snap their fingers and switch whenever the argument doesn't go theihett r way, but doesn't quite go thattt way with the human body putting estrogenhe hing estr in a man'sd news. like it's not just liks.e he wa measuring it. like, i want to make sure he felt like he was trying to make him as feminin."ing make possible. yeah. which only hurts his chancfemine of stealing a girl. yes, because here's the part. because she pickedpicked h
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him whene he was at his best. yeah, they're together. and then now the normatogethrma. things don't work. that don't work will start irritating her. weren't going to be therecause anymore because suddenly he's a goy. listener, yet suddenlsu wow, he's watching netflix and the one doing this, you know. you know, and we'll say things at breakfast like, go on. so " which will only strengthenl their relationship to the point when he goesngthen t crying to i and not understanding why his erectile dysfunction is happenings er him she's goinp to understand because he's not going to do a guy thing and like pick a fight with her because we're having issues and going to the bar at 12:00 in the afternoon and explaining [lau woes to a strippeafternoor with your wife's credit card. he's winning cash, throwing that out there. >> yet in the old days, a guy would just old steroids and get big to win the girl. this the opposite he's giving his rival estrogen so he can remain the same.
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but the guy can turn into a lady. n tufirst of all, thank you for doing your part to educate me about the old daysur. back in the old days are still there, but i all about it from. people say, i think this guy's shotsa with his girls over monto but also the way that he found out was he told them he got really drunk and then told thedm was doing this. everyone in the world knows it feels like to drink too much, like, ohoo muc like, i i know id have said that i'm mad. >> imagine the next morning. . that's like none of anything anyone's ever said compare s to getting so drunk. you tell your buddy of his fiancee that you've been buddy. you're obsessed with her, and therefore you've been dosing with estrogen so that she would like you more estrwould li you to tell god, ie jamie. do you believe this?>> jamie >> i think i do. i think i do. i would likei wo to apologizulet right. now, i've actually been putting estrogen in joe mackey's e mach and his estrogen drink. it actually makes sense. so just drinking.
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i was terrible. well, i thought that was milkshakes. and you saw how he out like, this guy's having some serious problems. he went to the doctor. they told hi he dm was swollen. >> he they're putting it in hist pre-workout. drink straightting i. do you know? you know, before my shows, they hand out pre-workoundt drinks. no, i.y till you know, i was with you, ja >>l the way until i actually kind of come up, you know, you heard that joke in the fall. he knew it was bomb. woul they still did it. >> do you want another one? uh, up, greg, that joke and hisd marriage h is when i want to fel like i took him on, and i'll just. >> i'll just hanag out with tigress and feel like a woman, and you can even sit hay lap. all right? what ever happened to just whatng a girl flowers? >> yeah.he what happened to the good old
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days? i thgood old days are goneold. and, you know, to me, i don't know. i think it's partly a pr stuntsl . if it is real, it just shows you you how dumb and stupid we've. e it shows you why we're just on the decline as human beings and or later robots will overtake us. >> i believe this is my theory that it was a publicity stunt from an obscure metal band, and if s o it was awesome, none the less. i think that was great. a great creativity. what they up?p. >> oh, really? well, they could reunite all of out. oh, that's a fun one. quick. our animal friends are legit. >> what do you do when you're goes flat and there's no air anywhere to fix that reach for bull's eyebrow. >> the smarter, faster hands, free way to fill it up with air. bull's eye pro is equipped with a rechargeable lithium ion power plant. so, so strong and so convenient. it's like putting the power of an air compressor in the
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that's 1-800- 6303838. if you love all the birds and trees and all the fishes, the seas. >> if you think videos of pets is as good as it gets this year, we hope your dreams come true. it's time to celebrate, my friends. jamie, you go first. all right. this>> greg: my video. >> it's this really cute seal on the side of the road. the whole time i read the story, i was just like, don't make a video, jamie. ait's easy. y some and i don't say something like, oh, they got this fromth joy bay vision board or this is brian stelter.
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>> after a fast i won't doa fas" those instead, greg, i'll justpe say this is one of the best looking protesters i've ever seen. yes. nick, what you got? well, the video i picked and ie think it's a good video because it's fitting. well, the second i saw it, it's a cow that's looking raindrop. but it reminde ad of seth meyerg watching joe biden like ice cream. that's what it really remindedir me. and i think it's time the democrats ditch the donkey gow goinge cow cos ditcheey and forward. >> right. tot, what do you havgoe tonight >> well, it's just cute. it's not about joe>> kat biden. look, look. oh, what's the kerry dishes? no, a kitt y. and then look. oh, look at that. no matter they're cats are amazing, you guys. that's a. that's that. they do do. thank you. thank you. thank you. all right. tigers closes out. u all right. my take affectionately called gen pop. s ou>> tyrmy couple, as you cani fighting off everyone, trying to eat their eggs, have their
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babies. and yes, this is the dark onesrs . woman her stripes come out when she doesn't want to mess with them. so i too so i took the babies out. and this is that is a the male is called a type seven blood seven and a female, the blood five. so i crossedle is them and thee are what the babies end up looking. wow. wow. run through so looking for that super color and they're i'm pretty a pretty proud papa is like 20 of them all year in terms of the budget cuts but i knowds you that's for that's for my maga fans. magthe red faced one right thep got his red hat even got the little trump little purple and yeah there. yeah that's maga country over there. ur>>all don't go away. we'll be right back.wd c we'll be right back.wd c i likeheer that i like that any block hey sore throat got you tongue mucinex insta to sore throat medicated drops uniquely formulated for rapid relief that last of us get mucinex institute it's comeback season. over 30 million americans were
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