>> sean: guess what they are dropping the phrase duty honour and country from the mission statement replacing it with the words army values however west point did make it clear that the phrase is foundational to their culture and it will always remain their motto welcome to jill biden's american nightmare also tonight big news from georgia the judge has said the ruling should come out tomorrow will fanny will speed disqualified we have that news tomorrow night that's all the news we have tonight thank you for being a war without pleas set your dvr in the meantime let not you're arbitrable greg got those and wipe a smile on your face you.

>> greg: happy thursday everybody let's do some jokes settled down you savages kamala harris made a campaign stop at an abortion clinic today where the staff told her it was too late thank you on tuesday's special prosecutor robert hurd descended his decision not to charge the joe biden ghostwriter for deleting inner the recordings with the president since it is the first time a ghostwriter had worked with an actual ghost americans being warned about a second wave of venezuelan gangs going over the border is another 100 inmates

have been released from prison in response the usa will be sending some of our worst to venezuela researchers came up with a list of the 100 most obese cities in the country topping the list were mcallen texas jackson mississippi and stelter bill new jersey. >> never over. >> anywhere. >> the plan to borrow six enjoying dollars of the next ten years is fiscally responsible what is also fiscally responsible is switching from coke to crack royal caribbean has suspended all trips to haiti following escalade black -- gang violence in the country and related story of my neighbour steve the campbell just cancelled his cruise to kanab haiti that is the strangest

picture that's a cannibal. >> he has a knife and fork. >> i can see that for the new booking tool allows travellers to avoid lying on 73 bondy planes it just links you to greyhound according to the latest census estimates the new york population shrank by 78,000 last year and a coincidence new york cemetery saw a jump of 78,000 customers it's funny because it is true the philadelphia phillies have scrapped their popular one dollar hot dog nights for the 2024 season this despite thousands of complaints from enraged fans north korea outlawed keeping dogs as pets unless they are used for their meat i am glad somebody was listening says one man he eats

dogs he did it once one time i'll never forget it today is march 14th also known as pi day or as it is known that liz those house thursday former treasury secretary stephen nguyen says that he is putting together an investor group to buy tiktok also putting together a group to explain how he got such a hot wife seriously that is an urgent and pressing question jenny jan admits she couldn't regret saying that inflation was transitory no word yet on if she regret selling her own hair terrible let's do a monologue delicious according to

the latest data losing their once customary advantage among black latino and asian american voters a lot of americans are realizing they disagree with the democrats and they are under no obligation to vote democrat just because of the colour of their skin just like i am under no obligation to like pickleball because i am white isn't that great. democrats keep insisting if you look a certain way you have to vote certain way but it's like i always say character is what matters most and looks are only important win hiring assistance but are the dems really losing the black and hispanic vote or are they losing black and hispanic men what if this isn't about race at all and more about the sexes and why are the dems talking about that because it tells you who is pushing men away from the dems awful affluent white female lives the kind who embrace any current cause parse out if something

happens to women who don't agree with their views they have lousy life skills they detest their dads they take picture of their food to fill the impetus of the lonely miserable lives until they die alone and are eaten by the cats they work in academia and government and hr and journalism they love talking about male tears as they traffic and chronic victimhood they are the women driving men out of the party and believe me it is scary enough that they are driving a sexist would say all about the dems know that women specifically seized single women how they win elections look at 202053 percent of married women back from 46 percent of married women back to biden 34 percent of unmarried women back trump all 64 percent of unmarried women backbiting like the crowd outside my dressing room that is

a lot of unmarried women when we see voting block start to shift republican is not because of race it's not that man hate people who are different we love equal rights we just hate special rights the democrats so obsessed with race they forgot about people in the process alienated man in favour of activists how are they doing it exactly well when you deny man's contributions to society or claim incessantly and incorrectly we are being rewarded unfairly for it men on the first to go unless they are men. >> these are the days. [ ♪♪ ]

>> nice that dylan came out as a parody of women chicks take pills and bubble baths and don't know sports a cute stick wait a decade or so unlike blackface it will be seen as gross except on late-night talk show hosts but mulvaney symbolizes the democrats problem thinking stock by indulging in activists splashing around in the bathtub all pretending to drink beer this blood no longer for you so is this party the women are women not just men democrat have embraced misogyny that like mulvaney pretends to be pro- women rats cannot say what a woman is let's say a young woman

told a republican friend that she wants to get a job at a bank and become the vice president by the time she is 35 republican friend will say find whatever good for you but if a woman went to a liberal friend and said i want to get married and raise a family by the time in 28 she would be laughed at she will probably be called a wife because that's what they will say maybe i'm wrong about this being a women's party when the abandon women different paths when they focus on language about an illegal instead of the woman murdered so i guess why men are leaving the democrats they want to treat women differently than the party does and by differently i mean better

former congressman leesville wague he has better impressions then whoopi goldberg seat cushions actor and standup comedian tyler fisher she can't lift other people spirits new york times best-selling author and contributor and when his back sweats his kids thank it's a slip and slide new york times best-selling author comedian [ inaudible ] you are the only woman on this panel tonight i thought i would go to your first you are in neither the democrat or holy can party would you be able to be in the democratic party the way it is? and wouldn't have anything to do with gender? >> no i can't be in either party

because they're both too statist for me it is nothing to do with gender but as the only woman here to get serious for a second something that i think that you missed because you're not a woman is he pointed out a lot of times if a woman would say she wants to just be a moment that kids that liberals would shame for that and that's true but which are also said that if a woman says i want to be a vp of a bank at 35 her public and was a good for you i think a lot would but not all there is the red pill andrew tate types that would say 35 you 35 that's your ram through you hit the wall at 30 no one wants to be with you once you've slept with too many men you're worthless no one wants her anymore anyway you should have had kids ten years ago and i'm not saying that by any means represents republicans because i know enough public demand to know that's not the case but those voices are very loud and basically what i'm

saying is you can get shamed from any side to matter what you do so at this point it just i said how i feel and i care less the older i did about how i'm going to be shamed for which is ringing away. >> that's good i don't care what anyone says. >> i believe the scientific term is [ bleep ] >> literally and metaphorically. >> i was trying to be a lady about it welcome to the show. >> always good to be here. >> great to see you. >> only other republicans but a couple good ones. >> they know who they are there proud of it. >> i have to credit michael malls for coming up with the term awful am i being in my painting with too broad of a brush. >> there's been a gender gap for a long time democrats that performed better with democrats with women with republicans

performing better with men i think the entire disenfranchised by different product parties they concern about public safety illegal immigration economy education more they are looking for conservative solutions we need to show up and be present inside the bluest areas and bring our ideas don't pander don't show up and say i love black people vote for me i love hispanic people and asian people vote for me it's pandering it doesn't work it should work but if we show up and work hard and take nothing for granted i have found there are a lot of americans women and men who are waiting for us to show up with our conservative solutions because they are so turned off by this party that they have voted blindly for for so long

and there are issues that transcend partisan loyalty they are ready i think we're starting to see that napoleon 2024. >> no one panders to sure people and i think. >> what are you talking about if you ever been to an airplane? the entire world is built for you. >> there is an opportunity cost to the race obsessed identity obsessed thing and to your point they forget about crime immigration inflation feel free to answer that observation with some sort of depression. >> i just want to say that cats not the only woman on the panel today. >> i think trump would say were sick of the democrats were race obsessed which is why i voted for lee for lee mccollum levi

the democrats never say can you believe it we have a decline this is breaking news a decline in the blind ambidextrous grandma vote can you believe that they are so obsessed they boils down to these categories it's crazy i just close my eyes when you talk. >> my girlfriends is the same thing. >> it's like trying to get the security guard to the window. >> sean: pick up our whatever you want from that monologue what to do then? >> i think it's insulting that the minority got asked the question last about. >> where minorities were small there's less of us. >> there's two of you in this

room right now. >> at the coalition. >> sean: of two of you get together. >> we can share a coach seat. >> we could sneak into r-rated movies of i'm on their shoulders >> i can choke you both with my hands for interrupting me. >> you started it. >> i will finish it no one has suffered more than the [ bleep ] i hate being grouped not a race thing that changed me they was a paycheck saying when i saw how my taxes were coming out of my paycheck that i was working as i was rising up in the world i was like i need to pay attention to this taxation thing and slowly as i grew became more conservative because i was concerned with my money so it's not anything for black men in particular i can only speak from my experience is nothing, families apart especially young

families apart more than democratic policies what i'm saying by that is okay in college we have one of my guys i play ball with 19 years old to kids girlfriend came from alabama had to get on services he couldn't live with that he had to live separate from his family because if a man moves and you don't have any aid you don't have support so already telling young people trying to come up you don't have to be black for this anyone who's broke or for our young family unless you're shortening your out with the system is designed to split so he can now he has to play rent where he is staying and he has to contribute which he can't so there is the brake financial problems family breaks lp doesn't see his kids that's the program that we grew up with which excludes black men and again i'm saying an area where i grew up i'm sure if i went to different areas around the country with different coloured people it would be the same [ bleep ] men don't matter and and the more we come up that's the difference i was never down the

democratic party because i was like this is not for us they don't care about is because if they did they would be working hard to keep families together and watch them grow that's not what they're about republicans at least are honest about if you want you have to go get it i don't want to help you and i have more respect as i'm the same way i got mine get yours often asked why life sucks in the land of the woke canucks

>> they imprison you first page please leave your car keys within reach a proposed canadian law allowing judges to imprisonment for life not over something you did what you say

like if you were to say that you were for genocide what is that even mean will be a rest home or a rest israel supporters because hamas supporters see them as genocide is unlike merkel i can say genocide is bad the life imprisonment for hate speech in america you don't even get that for murder the law would also empower judges to put you under house arrest if they believe you will commit a crime that gets rid of those pesky things like evidence and doing something illegal course prime minister trudeau supports the measure understandable as an oppressed person of colour but there is more a justice on the canadian supreme court says calling a rape victim in a prior case a woman was unfortunate and here i thought the important thing was the rape she should have been called a person with a regina

i'm sure that is comforting to the victim the reason this is considered a mistake it may have engendered confusion engendered confusion and pick up her. and put on her cleavage involves the only gender confusion comes from the court not normal people i don't need to know if that judge has about to declare her and asked whole i hope she doesn't arrest me finally toronto police tell people to let thieves steal their cars one cop said to prevent the possibility of being attacked in your home leave your fall but the front door they are breaking into your home to steal your car come on canada politeness has limits 90 can be arrested for speech while it's easier for actual criminals to avoid arrest over real [ inaudible ]

keep your mouth shut and your car door open and the less said the better meanwhile the thief is driving your car to a country with more free-speech was going on canada i thought they were our cool next-door neighbours but i'm not so sure. >> how helpless if you're a toronto resident and the government is telling you you need to be helping thieves steal your car and there is no fight or rule of law or law & order essentially they have given up on themselves we have our own problems here in new york we have prosecutors that refused to prosecute criminal laws being passed and you think new york and california and some type of race to the bottom end toronto

was like hold my molson this is a new low it's getting worse. >> molson why limit to cars do you think the thieves will be happy with that when i leave your wallet so they can get gas or maybe some milk and cookies for santa. >> our closets are stuffed with milk and cookies greg i came from your outside dress like a trucker i'm still reps under the truck a convoy in canada but i have a little toy truck maybe the house he said the key is under the rock will go live in your tent i just came from toronto i did a show and you have to appreciate the free-speech that we have here you don't have free-speech and i had a protest at my show because canadians are so pleasant they did it silently and they got up and walked out and i don't know we need jordan pearson to be like it your life in order trudeau get your shed out a

grass take the black face-off to the job do something with your life and clean your room maybe that's the problem the rooms are all dirty and all goes back to those sheets there are like three things in here that are just gross is canada over. >> i was with the south park when they said blame canada their weird anywhere top of their heads don't even connect to the bottom of their mouth i stay canada as much as possible just a message is clear as day will allow whatever we want shut up about it if you talk about it or complain about will punish you because we can't fix the problem and we don't want to fix the problem so we break a few eggs it's like the lottery and hopefully you're not one of the eggs because if it happens cooperate because we don't do the paperwork if someone breaks into your house to steal car and

there's a woman their fairness day for a little more the idea that your home is not even save your best defence is not fight to the and not scream and hope the neighbours comments give them the keys because if i went in to someone's house and they gave me whatever i wanted is a good chance i come back and i keep going back how you got a new car okay boss also on the porch with you to get home would you get barbecue sounds good all go that house you give me sum sour cream, chino will just get it myself that's what it is turned into its their problem that we see it here canada wants to that i don't [ bleep ] canada but in america were seeing it words mean more perfect example correcting the legal i wouldn't mind the

example of you being at my house and coming over i could have a friend here when i get home. >> will be as friendly as you think especially when i'm just leaning on you on the couch and you're like i have to go to the bathroom while you didn't ask in the near my remote who i'm still waiting for the bad part can imagine from now on spreading to companies you say what's a girl what's up the china. >> hr now has to condemn you for saying woman you must say regina totally reversing human resources. >> a lot of thanks interesting in canada launches leave the keys in the ignition just leave it running one of the auto

manufacturers in detroit thank the macrocell cars are there to sell more cars people giving up on cars crazy the craziest thing is the lifetime imprisonment speech as he pointed out to the eye of the beholder like all speech i never thought someone and just and could be this dangerous. >> i don't trust anyone named justin now except for my massage therapist. >> sounds like a guy you want to know. >> up and asked how will don

lemon cope after musk told him no.

>> well that was fast elon musk cancelled don lemon's new x show hours after they taped an interview for the debut episode musk says it because it was like cnn on social media all he did was try to go through clicks by bringing up replacement theory what are your thoughts? >> i think you probably try to put a chip in his brain i think that is required now for a show on x and all of the host start to sound like him and you have done lemon like will white people/but spacex is coming along pretty good we want to kill the way people i'm working on the impression bring it back tomorrow. >> it's hard to do elon musk.

>> he was doing don lemon there i was done lemon as it's very obscure. >> counter life so i'll do it better. >> isn't it funny that he was asked would ask about replacement theory is limited who keeps getting replaced. >> when is enough enough who should hire him at this point doing it for attention someone who can't make lemonade out of a don lemon and the juice isn't worth the squeeze the guys the pots they think you will and said it best he thought he was getting this other version of don lemon who was going to be like new and reformed after reflecting on why he got fired from cnn it turns out it's just the same old don lemon the guy who got kicked off the cnn and i think that the matter how many lives you give this guy every time he comes back he is going to be just as bad as last time.

>> i was so disappointed was thinking about how much don lemon content we would get for the show i feel cheated. >> you have to wonder what he does now he can't do nothing he clearly can't just go hang out how long if he hasn't already before he goes and reaches out to chris cuomo again and is like, hey, i'm sorry can i be on your news nation show and then what does he does he tell them know or does it tell him yes, because when he got fired then he got fired and now they apparently the two the fired guys i guess crisco on top at this point. >> i think part of the reason he was upset as he gave this guy another chance another opportunity and he used it for clicks and giggles. >> it's not where he belongs you belongs here with us listen to that you could drop a pen that's that let's try something different let's open the door

and bring him astray bringing one from the other side will give him a little chair why not this is what's wrong this is what's wrong i'm willing to give them a chance worst-case scenario he sits in the chair and tries to [ bleep ] greg and i embarrass them and you laugh and then we all go let's go home give them a chance because i'll say this and like it or not i don't care about before trumped arrangement i would call don lemon a left-leaning news man who i could sit through and be like i don't agree with that i don't agree with that okay but i don't agree with that and that's fine we don't have to agree we don't need to their needs to be different venues different lanes for everybody i say don the water is fine he will not bite come on. >> unless you ask. >> one-on-one don lemon greg gutfeld fix this tire is watching closely and during the back with that thing that's been

different say come to our side our water is great. >> i keep it warm. >> i think after eight years i would know when to stop you could pervert anything. >> i like to thank so. >> i like the fact he used that as a verb i do pervert things should we be concerned about tiny racist sperm

>> last time we heard a clip from earlier in the week about a young boy he smeared with false black phase accusations.

>> what were people offering to write that they were saying no i think that we see that it is it's way worse then we know. >> i'm trying to think that could i like that thing didn't do is your infant racist. >> if you're at home right now when you google is your infant racist that will probably. >> it will tell you yes. >> there is an article. >> sure enough several articles on the subject of racist babies proving yet again how right i am we dedicated a whole segment to it in fact but then i double down and propose this. >> let's try this again that's google we said it is with we said babies google is it possible that you're unborn child could be racist and then google can sperm be racist if we have articles that were doing this again tomorrow and will tomorrow is tonight you don't have to applaud our loyal gutfeld fans googled it and sure

enough racist sperm article after article the nobel prize sperm bank racist research higher u.s. sperm donor bank the new york times during the george floyd summer how should we think about race when considering sperm donors ask the author if i choose a donor of cover am i choosing my child to be born to a system not designed to serve hammond and my concern -- succumbing to racist ideas about what is desirable that you haven't proving once again that grog is not just barrel. >> there is no such thing as racist sperm i am living proof of that i literally have one from every corner of the earth because men don't care if there was the racism jean it's in the egg it's not us you can't there

is no doesn't matter it doesn't matter the questions you're asking when you have a child if you're concerned with that because you should be able to raise and love it doesn't matter if they come out purple the idea that if i do this here virtue signalling about a child you wouldn't care if you really want baby you won't get that baby if its colour of the baboon you want that's baby you want they be so bad again all stupid men don't have racist sperm if we did there would be now there would be none you wouldn't have you've never have a different racing ever have a guy in the moment the penis like i just send some irish air what are we doing well what are we doing no no no like what it is a move like that sorry. >> we have gone from racist kids to babies to sperm do you think there could be racist molecules. >> you're not really right about

this one because there were accusations that a sperm bank was racist not to sperm and also the letter to the new york times where the woman was looking for a sperm donor and wanted to know how she should consideration her decision i'm not looking for a sperm donor not to brag but i almost wish that i wear because i would love to do this but i wouldn't write to the new york times i would just ask at the clinic i would love that they would say do you have more question then it's a yes actually how i used the choose the race and then just watch them squirm. >> when you look at sperm they are white and shaped like hoods. >> mi at work right now?

>> the study of us going on these sperm banks across the country finding that the sperm is actually proportional for the white population the issue is amongst different minority groups the bounces off and what was also interesting is they said demand right now for black sperm is higher so i think maybe all these years of racism at sperm banks has led to a point were actually the black sperm is the most popular and in demand so people should be celebrating this maybe i'm taking a contrarian view for my friends there maybe sperm banks are racist but it has served the common good. >> interesting. >> i don't believe anything that i just said. >> welcome to the club. >> i believe that.

>> as someone to gives away my sperm just as a hobby i'm very angry with your writers how did you miss this the minimum height is 5-foot eight to give away sperm. >> i didn't know that. >> and the average is 510 till we can't even do it greg we have to give it to each other. [ simultaneous talking ] >> how about height sperm banks. >> millions of women. >> that's the funniest thing i've heard. >> the same thing with military is and it don't they have height minimums? >> what can we do? >> cheers. >> who wants it. >> up next we share news from

nearby.

>> every guest brings a story from wherever your fun we want you to go first. >> at ten boy took his parents suv on a 30 minute joyride a flat tire in did this ride on a parkway unfortunately the kid was not hurt win cops arrived that is when the drama unfolded they found several empty juice boxes all throughout the car strong scent to free pond from his breath still under investigation stay tuned for further updates. >> your next is this about how short you are to be a sperm donor? >> i'm not going to say anything toilet paper clogging traffic on the freeway in santa clarita you know this is right up my alley or lena, hundreds of roles

october fell from the vehicle at 12:20 on the southbound lane think about that whenever you're in the stall and you can't find a tarpaper it's probably all out there, it fell from all ford f. 350 the sky cow overhead tossing the rolls over cement barriers the majority of tarpaper removed that's the end of my story because i am wiped. >> i bet it made some homeless people very happy go ahead. >> the best pizza in the world is made in connecticut. [ booing ] >> paul giamatti just got his very own pizza claimant bacon jimmy kimmel actually got his own as well each of the pepperoni's painted in black face had down to new haven connecticut.

>> since this is a [ bleep ] show you will love this, where i live there's a map can we throw it up there i live in the city with the most [ bleep ] and that and mosquitoes growing up its radioactive i can make you sick greg if you're looking for a place to vacation we are full of [ bleep ] you will sit in just fine. >> we will be right back

[ applause ] >> trace: it's 11:00 pm on the east coast, 8:0