would anticipate an acquittal in any other state but at least a hung jury here. >> neil: all right, that means donald trump is victorious. >> well, could be tried again, but prosecutors, they'd want to try again. >> neil: katie, quickly on that commitment to get nasty tomorrow, isn't it? >> well, i think it's a little almost over at this point. there is nothing michael cohen can do to establish those elements. the prosecution we need to throw up an accounting expert, this was improper documentation, and they are not going to do that so certainly the defense probably won't even have a case aside from maybe one expert and then the rest. >> neil: we shall see. katie, final word. mercedes, thank you both. 9:30 tomorrow, it continues. "the five" is now. ♪ ♪ >> jesse: hello, everybody.

i'm jesse watters along with judge jeanine pirro, richard fowler, dana perino, and greg gutfeld. it's 5:00 in new york city, and this is "the five." ♪ ♪ le 2024 race just got real pure joe biden doing his best clint eastwood impression, challenging donald trump to a pair of debates. >> donald trump last two debates in 2020, since then he hasn't shown up to a debate and now he is acting like he wants to debate me again. make my day, pal. i'll even do it twice. so let's pick the dates, donald. ii hear you are free on wednesdays. >> jesse: notice how there were five jump cuts and a 142nd video. donald trump excepting the challenge to take on "the worst president in the history of the united states and a true threat to democracy." the two talking trash for months. biden's own advisors apparently don't want him to do the debates, but it's personal for joe. we are told that sleepy is seething with hatred for

donald trump because he dares call out hunter's corruption. our prima donna president also has a list of demands. joe biden wants no audience, no third party, sorry, rfk jr., and they have the mics cut when the speaker isn't called on. is this really just an attempt to change the conversation? it is no secret joe has been bombing in the polls lately. peter doocy asked why earlier. >> so should we see the sudden offer from a president to debate as a signal you realize you need to change the subject after some really bad polls? >> i just don't want to get into polling, any more details on polling, as it relates to the debate, you got to talk to the campaign about it. >> who is going to stand in during the prep for donald trump? >> who is going to stand end? do you want to stand in for donald trump? >> so you are saying i can go debate joe biden behind the scenes? >> you know what? i think that might be fun for both of you. it might be fun for both of you. i think that might be fun.

i don't have anything for you on that. but i appreciate the question. >> jesse: judge jeanine, we just heard this this morning out of the blue. what does it tell you about the strength of the biden campaign then he just throws down the gauntlet like this? >> judge jeanine: well, number one, he is trying to be a tough guy, okay? i'm a tough guy. and number two, it tells me that his campaign is concerned about the numbers. he has always wanted to debate because he thinks he has this great tough guy who has a great record. heck, when he came in, inflation was 9%, right? that's what he thinks. but i think in addition to that, his campaign is concerned. they know they are going to lose. i mean, if the election were held today, they would lose. they are listening to van jones, axelrod, carville, and they know that they are in big trouble, but i think he is coming out offensively saying this is what we are going to do and this is how i want it. i don't want an audience.

now trump says that not having an audience is because biden is afraid of him, okay, but i think more than that, they are saying, i want to be in a television studio. to me, that says you want to already be at the podium, standing there when the cameras go on. we have candidate joe biden, candidate donald trump. there is no walking across the stage, stumbling, mumbling, not figuring out where you are going, and no large audience to respond to that. i thought, also, i hear you are free on wednesdays, i found that so offensive, and maybe not just because you know, obviously everyone knows i have a long relationship with donald trump, but you orchestrated this. you hunkered this guy down. and now you are over there sticking the knife, yeah, here you are free because court is open on wednesdays. one is at cnn, as i understand it, and that is the june 27th 1.

isn't cnn where donna brazile was able to get those questions to hillary clinton during that cnn debate with donald trump and cnn, you know, just kind of -- >> dana: no, it was the primary debate and about bernie sanders. >> judge jeanine: but there was donna brazile, and it was cnn, and she lied about it and then she finally admitted it. i think that in the end, i think that this is a good thing and i think that irrespective of the parameters come i think trump will do well. >> jesse: richard, why does he want to do one and the dead of summer? >> richard: a couple of reasons. one i think the story is fascinating because when i woke up this morning there wasn't a debate and how it is 5 5:00 on e east coast and there are carico. so that's fascinating. >> jesse: maybe there will be three by 8:00. >> richard: by the time we go to bed there might be 30:00 p.m. i think a couple of things. number one, this has been a long time problem with the presidential debate commission, it's a very old way of doing things.

also, often times, depending upon when the debate was scheduled, people had already started voting because of early voting and absentee voting. and i also think, is also, i sort of agree with the judge a little bit, for the biden team and the trump team, a debate in the beginning of summer, before summer holiday and before folks start to tune into the election is a great way to bring these issues up front. i think there is an interesting timing on this that is important to remember. june 27th, right after the supreme court has issued most of its ruling for the term. there is going to be a big gun ruling that comes out. also potential abortion ruling that will come out that i think these candidates will be able to tackle because the americans will be talking about that. i think, too, it was interesting, the trump team and a biden team, that make it a two-man debate that we can take that their candidates off the board. i think number three, removing the audience to me was a value add. we saw dana do a debate this year and she spent half the time telling the audience to be quiet. right? so having a live studio audience when there are millions of people watching at home trying

to make a decision, people booing and jeering and who is up and who is down, when the studio audience is not the bulk of the voters, the bulk of the viewers come i think having just the two candidates and the moderator in the room with questions will allow the american people to really focus and determine which candidate they want, which is what the debates are all about. >> jesse: what about the mic cutting? so there will be no crosstalk, no interruption, dana, does that take away from the spontaneity? or does it let joe biden just talk and talk? >> dana: i could argue it either way. but my instinct was this is actually probably good for donald trump and the reason is because when somebody that you are debating is searching for words, and is thinking about things and maybe stumbling a little bit, not saying stutter, i'm saying searching for the word, looking for the word, as the other person, you have a tendency to try and help the person out. even if you are -- or you are jumping in and saving them from that moment. i think it would be very interesting to just sit back, i'll wait until you can find

those words. you do that. i think that will probably work in his favor. i'm okay on the audience thing. i think there's a difference between a primary debate where everybody in the room agrees on 98% of the issues and they are only arguing about 2% and it was just a little bit of noxious. to your point on the free on wednesdays, not only was it undignified, funny for them, they are fundraising off of it. it's like the t-shirts, free on wednesdays. >> richard: i've already seen one of those. >> dana: there was that thing. between biden and his team. jacqui heinrich reported that biden is the one who said, i want to do this debate. finally, at some point, when the president of the united states, the commander in chief, oh, i'm doing the debate, announced it, you as a team after going to figure it out. i think obviously height, hardwired this with cnn, every 20 minutes this morning we had new information. mark penn was on this morning, democrat centrist guy can work for bill clinton, helped bill clinton get reelected by moving him to the center. he said this is an act of

desperation. it's a high-risk, high reward format. for biden in particular. but he needed to change the conversation. the judge said, he needed to say something -- you said in your opening -- the information this week has been so bad. and i think june 27th, i don't think it has anything to do with the supreme court. i think his team was like, we need four weeks to get this guy ready. >> jesse: also, that is a great point, june 27th, we might just have a ruling on hunter biden gun charge. his son could be found guilty of a gun felony. >> greg: pfizer better send him a big case of adrenaline shots to get him ready. the edits. it was like 13 seconds, there were like five edits? less edits in a michael bay movie. he couldn't even do that, that challenge, in one straight shot. i wonder what they left on the cutting room floor. may be this is why they hired steven spielberg, just to get joe to seamlessly complete a singular thought.

i mean, spielberg made a mechanical shark looked real through the magic of editing, may be could turn joe into a cogent human being, bring cgi, i think that stands for corpse galvanizing imagery. i'm thinking, though, i think joe heard finally what everybody else is hearing, that he is on his way out, and what do you do when you're on your way out? you set something in motion that makes it harder for you to leave. it's like when jesse volunteered to be our floor's marshal so that might buy him some time at the network, and it worked. it worked. why is he doing this? i'm happy he is doing this. i'm glad he is doing it. maybe jill told him to do it. maybe it is just easy to say you are going to do it and then back out. and this is just buying you time and you can come up with reasons for backing out. there could be another new hoax they push that makes it like, we cannot debate this man. he is undebatable. it is beneath us to debate him.

we don't even know what the hoax is but they'll find one, or perhaps they are banking on him being found guilty and then they can say we are not going to debate a felon. or they're going to keep making conditions untenable or hope that trump makes conditions that untenable. i don't think trump will. maybe they are trying to keep the republicans thinking that joe is the candidate when he really isn't because they are in big trouble. i have to say, i don't know why biden would avoid debating. it's one of the few things he's good at. i mean, he's the best biden is on the debate stage. and, you know, we make fun of him all the time but that is where he really shines. if you think i am lying, i am. [laughter] i learned a lesson. you do not want to build really, really low expectations for joe biden because it makes it easier for him to win with the media. a very, very low bar guarantees he will beat the expectations because you go, oh, my god, at least he lived.

he didn't fall. i'm going to go ahead and say right now, take it out of context, joe biden is the best presidential debate or i have ever seen and it is about time he gets on that stage. >> dana: impossible to beat. >> greg: impossible to beat. >> jesse: a master debater. up next, the ladies of "the view" had to put a gag order on robert de niro after his profanity-laced rant against trump. ♪ ♪ ng better with age. here's to beating these two every thursday. help fuel today with boost high protein, complete nutrition you need... ...without the stuff you don't. so, here's to now. boost. (psst! psst!) ahhh! with flonase, allergies don't have to be scary. spray flonase sensimist daily for non-drowsy long lasting relief in a scent free, gentle mist. flonase all good. also, try our allergy headache and nighttime pills.

hello, i'm franklin graham. as we watch the news, it feels like the whole world is filled and engulfed with hate. we see it on our college campuses. we see it across the world. where did this come from? you see, hate is coming from the human heart. god made us and he created us, but sin has come into the world, and it's come into each and every heart. and the only one who can fix the heart is god. and god did that by sending his son, jesus christ from heaven to this earth to take our sins. he died in our place on a cross, shed his blood, and was buried, but on the third day he walked right out of that grave. that's right, jesus christ is alive, and my questions is have you ever invited him into your heart?" if you haven't done it, do it right now.

just say, god, i'm a sinner. i'm sorry. forgive me. i believe jesus is your son. i want to trust him as my savior, and i pray this in jesus' name. if you prayed that prayer call that number right now that's on the screen. god bless you!

♪ ♪ >> greg: the media is still coping with the fact that the trump hush money trial is a turd tornado that has not swayed public opinion.

also obsessing over the orange nemesis getting some shut eye during the boring testimony. >> one thing that has changed in the republican party is that they are being in the tank for donald trump it off the dressing like him? they were all wearing the exact same outfit, like they were rockettes. >> i'm cheering for speaker mike johnson and yesterday was a very, very sad spectacle for america and for an institution i love. the old man sitting there in the defendant's chair, head tilted back, to the right, eyes closed, made it look like a trial at a nursing home. if he were found like that in his chair, at a table in the nursing home during lunch, he would be immediately checked for signs of life. >> he's enraged and that is why i think he is so orange because i think it is read underneath. >> greg: lawrence o'donnell is five years younger than trump.

and rachel maddow has been dressing the same for 20 years, like wally cleaver. the same clothes and the star of dirty grandpa robert de niro getting censored by "the view" after reading like a bull who saw a red maga hat. >> and they might think it is going to make life better or they just want to come excuse my french -- literally. it's almost like he wants to do the worst that he could possibly do to show this country -- this -- [cheers and applause] >> greg: jesse, i find that he is smartest when they drop his audio. but you know, it is kind of sad because you can see because people who are stuck in some kind of derangement, they can't see it themselves, and they are not surrounded by people telling them that they have a problem,

and he lacks self-awareness because everyone tells them they are wonderful or wants to sell him cocaine so he has no clue what he is doing and he is upset over the emotional nature -- his anger is emotional about trump, nothing practical. >> jesse: remember he is the most boring interview, he used to sell his movies on leno and letterman and it was like watching a wnba game. you were just bored to death. and all of a sudden trump became president and started saying things, i want to punch the president in the face come he's a crooked piece of -- and then all of a sudden did nero became interesting during his media tours and that is the only way now he can get publicity for his films, by cursing and saying whatever he says the movie -- i guess that works. i guess it was maddow that was mocking them for wearing the same things, the democrats all wore african tribal gear and kneeled for george floyd. not really what you would call

an american hero. the democrats all wear white drama state of the union to honor suffragettes. they are still wearing ukraine pins. people wear things to show solidarity. you are going to see red, dnc blue, at the eagles game, you are going to see green. and the other woman, i forget who it was, the guy is sleeping -- she's meditating, greg. >> greg: yes. >> jesse: a meditative state. when you are defensive about something, you avoid something. trump is not defensive of being old and tired. he can shut his eyes and not feel bad about it like sleepy joe. >> greg: you know, kind of what jesse said but not really, de niro represents hollywood and the sense that they realize they are losing influence with the public, and that's what's generating the emotional response. they have never felt less important. >> dana: doesn't it feel like 2016 again? we live through this. didn't know mike did they forget? feels like they forgot -- remember just this week that

kamala harris dropping the f-bomb had a group, whether trying to be likable or letting loose. i don't think that's true. >> greg: she was. >> dana: making fun of republicans going to defend president trump, if they thought that this trial were going well, that trump was actually going to get convicted or this case was actually a good case, do you think for one second the democrats wouldn't be there at the microphones? they are running away as fast as they can because they know it is a dog. if they thought this case was going so well for them do you think biden would say, you know what, we really should do debates and change the subject, no, they need to change the subject. >> greg: judge, there's a lot of things you never hear de niro get upset about, and they are the real concerns and actual real life. crime, illegal immigration, inflation. instead, he's obsessed with these hike hypothetical what-ifs, trump going to hold onto power, none of them true. >> judge jeanine: the amazing

part of this is they say these things and i say am i living in different world? donald trump was the president for four years. he didn't do any of the things they are claiming. he left office. and the amazing thing is robert de niro, he's good when he is reading a script and a movie, but is not too smart in real life. he talks about donald trump being a hitler, being a mussolini, and if i were the relative of someone who was one of the millions killed by hitler, or mussolini, i mean, i would be infuriated. how dare you compare someone who was a president and will probably or may probably be the next president to a man who literally butchered to men, human beings, for no reason other than hate. and yet we let them get away with it as if he is worthy of even talking about it. and lawrence o'donnell, you know, it's amazing that he would even talk about donald trump closing his eyes. you would think the democrats wouldn't go near any story about

an old man closing his eyes because joe biden is the one who literally falls asleep and nods his head. he's done it several times. he's done it internationally. he's done it at the white house. i remember he was in a wing chair with another leader and he wasn't just closing his eyes, he was going like this. so, you know, they can hate all they want. rachel maddow, look, she wears a black suit every day. that's her choice. someone could come in and say that means x, y, or z. nobody cares. nobody cares of men where suits with a red tie. what are you going to wear? it's ridiculous. they don't know what else to say. >> greg: you know, richard, the other team, let's say your team, grabs clips of, say, from "the five" or sean hannity or jesse's show, they could say we are a wrong but they cannot say they are acting crazy. we have fun. but why is it on the other side, let's say the msnbc, the cnn, "the view" side, they actually

appear like they have psychological issues. that this stuff is so ingrained, trump derangement, that they are mentally ill. de niro clearly is having problems. his therapist is getting paid a lot. why is that? is it because they don't have a life outside of politics? >> richard: i don't know, i'm not de niro's therapist and i'm not sure what that bill looks like. if you are de niro's therapist, please call and let us know. i think them wearing the same outfit is a little funny, let's just call it, a joke as a joke and that was a good one. jesse, because i have to say this, wnba ratings are up right now. >> jesse: who is watching that? >> richard: not only are the games -- not only are the games sold out but they are moving to bigger arenas because more and more people are buying tickets. big shout out to women's basketball right now. >> dana: good, changes the subject. >> richard: i'm going to get to it but i had to do that. i think there has been a lot of media coverage. i think there's been almost too much media coverage around this trial because at the end of the day come on like the debate

where the american people are deciding, this is going to be decided by 12 people in the y box and there are no cameras in this jury, no cameras there. they are the ones receiving this information, ultimately the ones making the decision here and so his prognosticating and polling on how or when we think it's going to happen, it is all based on the 12 individuals. and i think beyond that, when it comes to the voters, how they will feel about this, i think a lot of voters have made their mind up, one side of the isle you will feel one way about this, the other side of the aisle you feel the other way about this. those independents -- i don't think they are sitting in america's diners eating eggs, one or two or three jobs, trying to make ends meet and they care about teaching table issues which is why -- no -- >> greg: three jobs right now. >> richard: not necessarily. they love working three jobs. >> richard: not messily waiting for trump. undecided and i think a debate next month talking about those issues and start prognosticating about a trial were 12 people decide that aren't them is the most important thing. >> greg: all right, fair enough.

coming up, alvin bragg letting the cop beating migrants on easy and eric adams has a job for them -- if they can swim. ♪ ♪ if you have chronic kidney disease you can reduce the risk of kidney failure with farxiga. because there are places you'd like to be. farxiga can cause serious side effects, including ketoacidosis that may be fatal, dehydration, urinary tract, or genital yeast infections, and low blood sugar. a rare, life-threatening bacterial infection in the skin of the perineum could occur. stop taking farxiga and call your doctor right away if you have symptoms of this infection, an allergic reaction, or ketoacidosis. ♪ far-xi-ga ♪ ( ♪ ) i thought water would help with these dry spots. that's lawn disease. but scotts healthy plus will cure it! lawn disease? been going around. so like other people have it and it's not... pick up a bag of the new scotts turf builder healthy plus lawn food today. feed your lawn. feed it.

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♪ ♪ >> judge jeanine: radical d.a. alvin bragg's disgraceful priorities are front and center. he throws the book at the likes of donald trump and daniel penny and goes soft on cop beating illegals. bragg has reportedly offered a plea deal -- plea deals -- to six of the illegal immigrant suspects who violently beat up nypd officers back in january. and with no deal, they were facing up to seven years behind bars. if they were found guilty. "the new york post" reports that one of those suspects was offered a plea deal was actually rearrested recently for ace completely separate crime.

he allegedly tried to steal clothes and perfume from macy's and he is now free. but a crime doesn't work out, they may have a future in new york as a lifeguard. new york city mayor eric adams is getting mocked like crazy after seriously suggesting this. >> how do we have a large body of people that are in our city and country that are excellent swimmers, and at the same time we need lifeguards? and the only obstacle is that we won't give them the right to work to become a lifeguard. that just doesn't make sense. >> judge jeanine: you know, greg, i'm going to ask you if it makes sense that a mayor who makes what seems to me a racist claim that the illegals coming into this country are excellent swimmers, and he wants them to become lifeguards for our children when we don't know who they are, whether they have a record, whether they are a pedophile, and the whole idea he

would prioritize the need for lifeguards to all of the other problems in new york city. >> greg: maybe he thought they all swam here. >> judge jeanine: he does! >> greg: isn't the lifeguards main job to enforce rules? how are they going to do that? no running unless it is from immigration? when you drown will you have to scream help in spanish? hochul said, you know what she said? mexicans have no idea what a lifeguard is. i feel bad for mayor adams. he is no longer mayor of a city that is operating on rules. he is literally drowning. not literally, figuratively drowning. that's why he needs lifeguards. this is a sea of chaos. it's like, what do you do? this all makes sense now. david angelo has a great bid about how we designate the most important jobs in the world to teens, the two jobs, babysitter and lifeguard. one takes care of your kids and infants in the other one saves lives. now we are switching that to

illegal immigrants. handing a job in which you are supposed to look out for people's lives to people we know nothing about. but this is the consequence of false compassion. we placed illegal immigrants in this box of the oppressed. so they have more rights than you, the actual citizen. apparently there are people who are above the law because they already broke it. >> judge jeanine: you know, dana, you are an illegal who came here illegally and you have no right to be here, and you make a decision, along with your friends, to beat up cops, literally get them to the ground, kick them, kick them in the head, punch them, and we pay for their attorney fees. we pay for their translators. we pay for the room and board. and alvin bragg wants to cut them a deal, but this case is all on video. all you have to do is turn on the video and say, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, make a

decision. >> dana: it's not hard. what made me sad today as for the new york city police officers who know that the d.a. does not have their back. and that they can go out there, they can get beat up, they can arrest them, they know they will be out the next day, and i worry about the future of recruiting cops, of losing so many cops to retirement because we need their expertise here and we need to have their back. today, the house republicans introduced several pieces of legislation, basically backing the blue and targeting soft-on-crime policies from d.a.'s all across the country. but the pervasive rot of progressivism and social justice, right, there are things you can do to improve the justice system. this is certainly not one of them because it makes all of them unsafe and it just reduces that quality of life that we have in the city, and it's not just here, although we live here so we care about it. it is cities all across america. little things here and there,

philadelphia, st. louis, los angeles, san francisco, denver, i mean, it's happening and a lot more places than we realize. >> judge jeanine: you know, jesse, so we talked about the mayor. we talked about the d.a. i want to talk about the judge. the judge's name is judge laura wood. this judge, i was reading the transcript, says she is furious that one of these guys was rearrested. she said, i'm fuming. another slip-up from you and you'll land behind bars. why would a judge talk like that when they are illegal to begin with and beat up cops, and then they steal property. we are taking care of them. they have no ties to the community. she is saying to an illegal, you know what, next time i'm really going to get serious. >> jesse: because she is a new york judge who believes in five, six, seven chances, no real judge in the heartland is going to put up with this garbage. you know it and i know it. alvin bragg didn't cut a plea deal for donald trump, but these

people get deals? that's insane. donald trump coded a ledger wrong on a book. these guys come across the country -- go >> judge jeanine: we don't even know if he coded it. >> jesse: and then kick a cop in the head. come on. guys, go on a long, we have elections to interfere with, go about your day. adams. how does he know they are good swimmers? because they floated across the rio grande? i will bet, judge, that the central american nations have not a single metal and swimming. not a bronze, not a silver, not a gold, i'm just going out on a limb, i did no research. and greg is right, they need to do more things than just swim, they need to do cpr. with a need to speak english. they have to twirl the whistle. if you keep on talking to these democrats, they're going to come here and be engineers and scientists. can you come in here and wait tables? can you please pick my crops? can you be a lifeguard?

this is what is happening. >> judge jeanine: okay. all right, what about the fact that all these illegals, they are released without bail, okay, they are kicking cops while they are down -- wait a minute, this is so offensive to me. this is so offensive, that you would kick cops while they are down, and yet, i think they've got a whole area, hopefully, people cursing up a cops in spanish while this was going on. do you think they would get a break if those same people doing the same thing were wearing red maga has a new york? >> richard: listen, a crime is a crime is a crime is a crime. >> judge jeanine: that's not a question. >> richard: wait a minute, let me answer. i think the fact that they are getting a plea deal is unfortunate. i think they should get the book thrown at them for abusing a cop, whether you are an american that does it or undocumented person that does it. a crime is a crime and you should be prosecuted for that. i think we are mixing two different stories here. don't get me wrong, i think with the mayor said was not a very

artful thing to say. i wouldn't have said it that way. at all. but i do think what he said after that is the thing that matters. we have folks in new york who i would like to put them to work, doing a lot of things, so there are some scientist to cross the border, there are some nurses across the borders, there are doctors across the border, there's work to be done in new york city and a lot of place and looking for people to hire but unfortunately for many folks who come to this country who are undocumented, they do not have the right work permits to get any of these jobs, which is with the mayor is trying to say there, which requires washington come either side of pennsylvania avenue from either the congress or the white house or somebody there to do something to modernize our immigration system to make this process easier, safer, and better for local mayors, as well as those who are crossing the border as well as those -- >> judge jeanine: modernize the system? how about you -- >> richard: yes, modernize, laws from the 1980s. >> judge jeanine: oh, 1980s. so were most of the homicide -- most of the homicide statues. >> richard: but that -- >> judge jeanine: and all the

crimes -- >> richard: but -- >> judge jeanine: we all need to modernize -- >> richard: but with all respect, the reason it is so hard to enforce it is because we don't have enough immigration judges because there is a backlog -- >> judge jeanine: we because we let too many of them in. what are you talking about? >> richard: if you get caught today, you get summonsed, 2027, we do not have enough immigration judges in the system. >> judge jeanine: maybe we shouldn't let that many people in the system? >> jesse: am a scientist, judge, they're just scientist. >> judge jeanine: i forgot. coming up, pro-terrorist collins are ruining college graduation so we have our own commencement message for the class of 2024. ♪ ♪ i hear it all the time. people tell me they'd love to buy gold. but because it's gold - they think it must be complicated. it isn't. not with rosland capital. with rosland... the entire process from start to finish is built on one concept... one... keep... it... simple. rosland capital - a trusted leader

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♪ ♪ >> we will free palestine! >> we will free palestine! >> within our lifetime!

>> free, free palestine! >> dana: all right them and i israel protesters disrupting or canceling college commencement events, but have no fear, "the five" is here to offer students words of advice. i'm going to go first. are you ready? to the class of '24, at least those of you who have not walked out in protest for my support of israel, as you embark on the next chapter in your life adventure, always keep two things in mind. one, you should never use social media when you have been drinking. two, when your life story is told, they will either be a biography or an autobiography. the biography is when you make key decisions based on what other people want and expect from you. the autobiography is when you stay true to yourself, and that is what you want for yourself. 99% of the people who recognize true success and happiness write their own story, so don't be afraid to follow your dreams and take chances because success is the end result of many failures. and if you are willing to learn from those failures, your autobiography will be a best seller that is so good, you

can promote it shamelessly, like jesse watters. [laughter] all right, greg? >> greg: i have not worn one of these since i did "undergrads gone wild," that was an amazing movie, hot tough boys hot. all right, if anybody tells you to be yourself, ignore them, they are trying to sabotage you. if you are supposed to be yourself, why do we have manners or customs or laws or dress codes or of the golden rule? telling people to be yourself is a trick to get you to pursue instant gratification untethered to actual self-improvement. and oddly being yourself house you looking like everyone else. look at the protesters. it's a parade of conformity. instead of being yourself, try being a better version of you. live your life as if your grandparents are watching you, or you are being surveilled by someone you admire. i often imagine as i'm walking around the lee majors is looking

at me and then i end up acting like a better version of me. so maybe if you admire somebody like beyonce, right, imagine her looking at you. is she going to be impressed that you are sitting on the couch eating pringles, playing some video game? or reading some stupid blog? or will she go, oh, isn't that sweet? that young person is helping out her parents are doing something nice for someone. so instead of dancing like nobody's watching, live your life like somebody is. >> dana: very good. jesse? >> judge jeanine: very nice. >> greg: i just came up with that. >> jesse: esteemed faculty, parents, grandparents -- >> greg: free palestine! [laughter] >> jesse: in a rare moment of -- >> greg: jesse watters the sox! >> jesse: i will be sharing with you wisdom from stoics, the founding fathers. with be honest, you are not going to believe anything that fox news says.

so graduates, sleep no less than seven hours and no more than eight. rise and shine at the same time as you rest your head every day. when you do rise, drink water with lemon, outside in the sun, and then i recommend a nice brisk morning run. spend time in nature. lift heavy things. [laughter] and expose yourself to extreme heat and cold. it is good for the soul. eat eggs, fish, meat, fruits and vegetables, and not speak or remember, stress kills, so breathe, read, right, and reflect. save 10% of each paycheck. put it in investment accounts

and savings accounts. and have great sex so loud that your neighbors call the cops. [laughter] so fall in love, get married, have children, and keep your bare feet in the soil, and always remember, i'm watters, and this is my world. >> dana: that was very good, i loved it. richard? >> richard: dear graduates, this is your first commencement because covid-19 capitals are high school graduation, so lifeu would be ideal and the importance of persistence. that will take you far. today, dream all your dreams and live up to them and pursue them vigorously, and forget -- and never forget that even when life creates a stumbling block, that someone block is to give you a life lesson. at the height of the covid-19 pandemic, i faced my own stumbling block and decided to return to the classroom myself to pursue an advanced degree in journalism. why i tell you this story, it's because i know that sometimes life will knock you down.

the trick is to get back up. to learn the lesson from the thing that knocked you down, and most importantly, never stop fighting. never stop fighting for your dreams and continue to persist to be a congratulations, graduates. >> dana: judge jeanine, bring us home. >> judge jeanine: okay. to the class of 2024, congratulations to those of you who chose to be here today to receive your diploma, as opposed to your fellow students, who reject everything that this university stands for. and prefer to align themselves with hamas university, a university of hate, discrimination, and extermination. as you already know, it's not going to be easy. if you are part of the generation of hamas students who have been raised to believe that they take whatever they want, and they want to shout you down and make sure you don't achieve your goal, because to them, meritocracy is the enemy.

to you, you have fought hard and fought long to make your goal, and this is just the beginning. i want you to fight for the underdog. i want you to fight for people who can't fight for themselves. i want you to remember that this is the greatest country on earth. that we have all the rights that other countries want to have, and that you have the ability to survive and go all the way to the top. remember that in the end of this is about your dream, and as i told my two children all through their lives, get to your dream and dance, baby, dance. >> dana: okay, everybody move your tasso over to the other side. coming up, blinken playing the guitar at a ukrainian nightclub.

>> richard: secretary antony blinken is jamming out guitar in ukraine basement bar and yes that rhymes. jesse? >> jesse: i have a tank of outrage. we have a long election ahead of us, and so the guy wants to jam in ukraine, let him jam. richard. >> richard: let him jam. >> dana: i'm for jamming. at least he didn't have to hire somebody to do it for him like john kerry did.

harold. >> richard: what did you think about it. >> greg: kind of sad. he couldn't take any requests because everybody there is dead. >> richard: come on. >> greg: look, we knew this was going. we have a war that's never ending. we have a war that's never -- nobody wanted. and nobody wants to stop it. we are putting it on life support. this guy knew this was going to come out. i want to know why he did it. and, by the way, ukraine just suspended their elections indefinitely and he is singing rocking in the free world. that's funny. >> judge jeanine: that's a great point. >> richard: what's your take, judge? >> judge jeanine: when i think about it, i think about the people in ukraine who are thinking about all their families, members who died and how their lives have been disrupted. how their kids aren't going to school. how everything, you know, all of the big buildings, museums. this guy comes to ukraine and is jamming. i mean, come to new york and jam. it's just a bad look. >> judge jeanine: y >> jesse: you can suspend

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♪ >> jesse: time now for "one more thing." greg? >> greg: what a show tom shillue, julie banderas, kat timpf, tyrus. that's tonight 10:00 p.m. tune in. >> jesse: unveiling a new series, wellness wednesdays where i tell you to ice plunge and eat raw fish. dana? [laughter] >> dana: four quadruplets in school in new jersey. i didn't think i would have time for mine. congratulations. look congratulate from the same college together. >> jesse: good job. judge? >> judge jeanine: i didn't think we had enough time. >> jesse: world record. for us have a good night. >> bret: i will wait for the judge to come up with something. >> judge jeanine: is that true i talk too much?

>>