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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  May 16, 2024 7:00pm-8:00pm PDT

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[ ♪♪ ] >> sean: quick programming note the second episode of my new special is out today only on fox nation. number 1 on fox nation 9 days in a row. episode what wall owes the rough justice of wild bill hickok in wyatt earp. you don't want to miss it checked out. set your dvr don't miss an episode. greg gutfeld full put a smile on your face don't. thanks for being with us pause pause. [ ♪♪ ]
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[ ♪♪ ] [ cheering ] >> alright! yeah! i know. kind no. i would feel the same way if i were you. let's get started. according to stormy daniels' husband the couple will leave the united states if trump wins the trial. so wait a second, she has a husband? that's like finding at the easter bunny has suppleness. did someone have sublists in here? i'm sorry i offended you. and get this, her husband is a porn star to. do they talk shop at home? i bet he complains when he doesn't have a hard day at work. wow this is going to be clean
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comedy. they will actually leave the united states which means strongly will enter another country as opposed to another country entering her. [ laughter ] >> sorry. rosie o'donnell reportedly scent a text michael cohen saying breed x., tell the truth. you got this. i love you. that's the same advice she gives herself when strapping on the feed bag. executives at abc are complaining about photos of good morning america cohost dimarco morgan showing and posing with a large old and skintight biker shorts. seriously what does he think this is a woman's swing team? [ cheering ] 16 women accused in magician
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david copperfield of sexual misconduct several of them would've been underage at the time. good luck keeping him in jail. [ laughter ] >> a new video shows avenues and doubting his success in fighting homelessness while also noting called -- california has become the number 1 destination for camping. newsome says the state has a national blueprint for solving the homeless problem before he could explain further though he was hit in the face with a handful of pcs from a passing vagrant. you don't like vcs either. i am going so much about this audience. 3 men arrested for the ledges that do 306 capital worth nearly $170,000. authorities essay despite finding the herd pierced still on the lookout for 5 others. [ applause ]
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>> note to self them like that that jokes and hate feces. a wild bull attacking bystanders at a popular los cabos beach. it's the most terrifying thing tourists have seen at a beach's instance. it appears the debate our lives. biden and trump are actually planning to stand on the same stage again and debate each other. joe told us about and in a certain -- 132nd video that had bar cuts then the risks of a depressed golf. watch. >> donald trump lost 2 debates
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to me in 2020 is since then hasn't shown up for 1. now he's acting like he wants to debate me again. make my day pal i'll even do a toys. let's pick the day donald i hear you're free a wednesdays. >> make my day the only thing that makes choate day is taking up is under 20 min's. hilariously the biden campaign claims he didn't mince words. >> the president himself did not mince words he said he beat dollar trump twice in 2020. dollars from hasn't debated since. the president is happy to debate and happy to do it twice. >> didn't mince words? they were literally minced in that video. the words were more chopped than dr joe sliced steamed bananas she feeds him every morning. but who needs the ability to form sentences out of did they especially with the teleprompter telling him went to pause and not [ bleep ] his pens.
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say what you want about trump but he has no problem not talking. the only guy stormy daniels said major ears sort. but with biden they need to slice and dice. in fact, we got our hands on the original of the video or check it out. >> let's do this thing. come on. donald trump lost -- debates in 1920. donald trump lost 2 debates to be 1920. what century is it? double trump lost 2 -- pretty sneaky says. what happened to him in 2020? says her he is in shown for a debate. now he wants to have a debate, now he's acting like he wants to debate me again. [ ♪♪ ] >> we'll make my day pal. what if i got to do twice? debate. make my day pal. unit who said that? east clintwood.
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clint black. bill clinton. in down behind the shed let's go for the debate donald. the dead did dates debates. i hear you're free wednesday. what does that mean? anthony! [ cheering and applause ] >> something is in the water at fox. anyway for those of us without dementia joan said demand for debate is a big surprise. earlier the biden campaign dismissed the idea. i'm not going to debate a criminal he crowed. last time i saw 180 like that brian stelter forgot happens order at the burger king drive-through. so why the change of heart and not the motherly 1 when they replace all joe's organs? our friend thinks it's a set of. keep an eye on the details of how this all comes together you
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don't often see a sudden 18 like this unless there is more to the story. if that sounds paranoid wait till i tell you how jay k. killed lee harvey oswald. [ laughter ] >> biden is demanding also to be no audience. no audience which granted is something joe is used to. usually when he is in a room with more than 3 people its on a gurney as nurses scream don't walk into the light. but i guess the audience is bad because there's nothing scarier then a presidential candidate who can relate to the people. still our old pal chris wallace thinks it's a great idea because who people are such a pain in the neck. i always felt that the audience was a pain in neck. some people are saying its going to hurt trump because he plays to occur. at gets overstated the advantage it gives either 1 of them. idling their pay much attention to it and i think it removes an
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unnecessary distraction. >> okay so it's the audience that risks distraction pierced something chris never had to worry about at cnn plus. the audience consistently was in the studio and the ghost of his disappointed father. i'm sorry. of course trump made this demand he would be accused of suppressing the will of people democracy and free speech. another biden demand of course no rfk junior. i get it. imagine a guy who sounds like katharine hepburn sounding more coherent than you ever could. and the conduit -- candidates microphone must be muted after a lot of time that weigh joe can fart away at will. of course they want to minimize his damage i'm surprised they didn't add no candidates either. that the media is cool with this especially since joe got to pick
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his teammates otherwise known as hosts. jake tapper and dana bash. sounds like a terrible british breakfast. so those are the 2 unbiased journalists. trump presidency is coming to an end. returns and millions of our fellow americans, a long national nightmare is over. >> insults and outright lies that's what we heard from donald trump and island as we can. >> the the dehumanizing rhetoric of adolf hitler is once again alive and longest time given life by former president and current aerobic and presidential front-runner donald trump. >> as he was talking was try to reach out to some senior republicans to ask when the intervention will happen. this isn't just dangerous, it's nonsensical. >> under my voice you hear him repeating his anti-immigrant rhetoric. >> wow talk about a.
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they're going to be as subjective as chris christie at a large tasting. meanwhile some of the media seem to already young his eagerness to debate almost immediately after biden's video dropped details they are thinking of the debate quote senior advisers felt they could skip them as the reelection campaign has been positioning itself as the 1 pushing for democracy and transparency. moreover it would feel talked biden was enough for the rigours for the job itself ergo aside ahead of time i guess the fix is in because biden is losing. a court cases aren't working. every time trump shows up in court his approval rating school. buff them or hate him he is got that thing that attracts viewers. some people have it and some people don't. but perhaps there is other tricks in the works, media big new hopes that will appear that lets joe back out on the basis of weekend debate this man a
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conviction perhaps the my gift of the excuse we can't debate a felon. so the stage is not set for a debate et cetera something else. if this was a fight biden would be quaking in his pampers. they're already interfering with elections right in front of us with these court cases, imagine what they are doing behind our backs without the courtesy of a reach around? you're a pervert. don't hold your breath expecting a fight. that's not -- not part of the democrat playbook is it have a trapdoor installed for trump and something worse installed for you and me. [ applause ] >> let's bring in our next guest! her languages so salty pretzel makers want to back her. [ cheering ] >> he makes more random noises and a 93 lebron. after commuting general or.
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popeye once cheated on olive oyl with her, new york times best-selling author and fox news contributor -- [ cheering ] >> ended truck is his toilet pair new york times best-selling -- [ cheering ] >> alright emily what do you make a list sudden decision to debate? what's the real story? >> the first thought that went through my mind is that this is a coup totally. otherwise why else wood they serve up the creek keeper and actually think you would carry the flag. than i thought to myself this is their manufactured answer to the fact the media and americans have been called for a debate. this enables them to say he said he would, he said he would do 2. it shuts up the ground swell of people we're seeing kaposi and president should be able to actually debate and other candidate on policy however every bone in my body doesn't think it will actually happen.
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i agree with you wholeheartedly. is like the scene in gladiator when the hideous ones shanked the attractive 1 and -- gladiator thank you russell crowe. whole point is americans want a fight. known is cheering or someone getting beat up and murdered while their hands are tied behind they're back. but this manufactured debate is exactly that. no audience, no microphones know this. the media will carry with it and pro he totally 1. if he didn't 1 -- when they would say look out he shot him down. they would create new mar lodge. but at the end of the day i think everything he does is beneath the office of the presidency but nothing more so than his crowing and glee and a former president acing criminal charges and him saying free on wednesdays give the teacher to your son. >> emily a piece of advice when you're using a film analogy try to learn the character. [ laughter ]
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>> that's all i got for you there. jim. as an expert in strange noises can you make a noise that describes what the debate might be like we. >> a lot of that. tells me he accidentally somewhere along the lies that debate." he said it then his team -- is like me saying i go around with tyler arlo fight fight him 1 day. it's not a record. okay well alright. but he can't use his arms. and they get the first 10 punches. you would still lose though.
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>> his feet could kill you. >> i did not write that 1. that was 1 of the few poop jokes i didn't write. i thought that 1 was beneath me. like many poop jokes. dew you think this is real? don't trust the democrats. they are doing law a right now what's going on? >> it's hard to say. rarely hope it happens though. i don't believe much sports so the debates are one-timer i feel like how sportspeople feel. watching and other people has their takes. i honestly think the rules they wouldn't hurt trump much at the good stuff to debate someone like ryden and asked our question of someone who looks acutely question you should bs in them is do you need a ride to
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the hospital? so anything they can be set up to make it look nicer to him it's so easy to look like you're bullying the guy. >> i will quote a cell phone a said biden's biggest strength is his weakness. i said at last they. >> welcome to my life in america. >> alright tires we talked about this in the green room so michael cohen claims cusa phone call with trump about stormy daniels and they find out now it was actually a prank. >> as a 14-year-old prank call or, i don't many -- know how many episodes of catch a predator i heard that on because a 14-year-old culling up going is your refrigerator running? yes, it is will go catch it! click. fbi there's a 14-year-old teasing you. know that's not why you called
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the fbi. over it was trump's bodyguard he calls, you don't call over a print colour. >> i'm a retired bodyguard. when you call us it's the fixer situation. what do i do? the great scene from the second godfather, that's the bodyguard. no 1's gonna know their name when dale asked favour you only call for help when you [ bleep ] up. so it's disgusting. this guy can't get any worse but what's more disgusting to me is the fact you had unmitigated goal on this show to say the back. i don't give a didn't pester the out been saying this since day 1. that there is no debate. fact even set the date. we don't even know who is present yet. have a heather little parties to say who's going to be present and represent? know he just randomly drop. june 27 let's have a fight.
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jfk can't come because no matter what he could have made it. but he, back i could make it. what kept the other guy be there? >> break point. >> there is no debate. he can't talk to anyone let alone answer a question. >> he could debate himself i would watch that. we got to move on up next michael cohen gets cozy with the not negros he. ( ♪ ) i thought water would help with these dry spots. that's lawn disease. but scotts healthy plus will cure it! lawn disease? been going around. so like other people have it and it's not... pick up a bag of the new scotts turf builder healthy plus lawn food today. feed your lawn. feed it.
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>> rosie you got this cohen. so jim, michael cohen takes the stand this week and the hush money trial and rosie o'donnell has been texting him, comforting him with messages of support like breathe, you got this. i love you. what an unlikely couple. >> i just think it's funnier that i visualize rosie o'donnell watching the tv going diet. diet. i got you and she is sitting there going word for word like, i love you so much. if you only have a penis. it wasn't a poop jokes. >> i don't know about this audience tonight. they don't know our brand. it's hoops and ep 24/7. if you want anything else go to special report.
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cat. have you been following this it's pretty bizarre. it's like what happens when you get new friends you lose are old friends and you get these new friends and you want to pleas her new friends, now i have rosie o'donnell and dan goldman or whatever his name is. >> as much as i would love to make 1 of rosie right now i have to say i feel like i have sent far more pathetic texts than that. not all of them texts, some of them had a dollar attached then. the person in question blocked me just begging to be back in their life. so she is a rescuer. rescue complex. i think they were his part about it for me is that she says it is so admirable how brave and strong he was to stand up to his boss and i'm pretty sure that's not what happened. trumpet broke up with him basically. and i think it was more standing
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up against the federal crime been charged with and wanting to get off easier on that. it was all self-serving. >> it is and it shows you you can be a dirt ball 1 day until they want to use the venue become a hero. >> you're sins like out if they are against their belief system. so where cohen by all stretches of the imagination is a horrible lawyer who will do anything and lie to clients but because he doesn't like trump anymore and she hates trump, he is now this wonderful human being. let's not forget all the clients he is rob from ad done horrible thanks to. it's not like 1 day he decided to be crooked. it's a long process. but this is what the left does. normally if this wasn't trump sheet be still calling him every name of the book but it serves the purpose. the thing about trump is he makes irrelevant again. evincing his normal get you on the back.
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she texted cohen known would care they probably texted a while. but she said the magic t word. low and behold were all talking about it and she is back. this is literally what they do. it doesn't matter what he is or capable of. he could be president because he doesn't like the orange guy. they get so much attention purchased the trump derangement syndrome, the way they will form bonds with their mortal enemies. there's no situation work on and rosie o'donnell whatever get along. >> all the sudden gay people are on the side of hamas because what? i don't know. >> emily a look at michael cohen and rosie o'donnell and it's like the most unappealing pair. with the exception of jerry nadler's testicles. that's for you audience. [ applause ]
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>> if you don't lock at them i'll make it even worse. >> of the love of god laugh. >> it's like the ultimate would you rather. >> she would rather you. >> so look. i agree with you i think it's a rescue complex. he is who the left likes to pray. he is their conquest which is so and it is turned on trump. a former insider that's turned on trump net they hold him up like roast beef and say this is the 1 we should all listen to. the reality of today's testimony especially more importantly robert costello became on box earlier and talked about it is that 6 years ago cohen was swearing up and down in the throes of his suicidal ideation he had nothing on trump. he was so desperate, that i've nothing to give about trump. here he is 6 years later saying there is something on trump there's been a whole host of
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evidence withhold from a grand jury that's being withheld this jury but not being withheld from us as americans. all we need is the 1 juror doled out and say this guy is not credible -- >> you have a movie analogy for that week. >> she did the grinch. she said roast be. >> that was awesome. >> used told anchorman which is what happens when i get home late. [ laughter ] >> up next that's for you to people. a day and gets high and mighty planning at all on whitey. all these games on directv— and no satellite on the roof!
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[ ♪♪ ] >> yes.
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far left congress woman by anna presley brings us our video of the day. yesterday a hearing about sexual harassment. at the fdic's questioning why most sexual browsers don't get punished. role it. >> them so tired of white men bailing out this lack of accountability is shameful, inadequate and deeply unsatisfactory. it's retraumatizing. >> really? white men bailing out? she is partly right about 1 white man. [ laughter ] >> failing up and he is only up tire us does she have a point? >> hell, yeah, she has a point. i'm so tired of this. white people into them when they mess up this still did open. that's [ bleep ] i mean i just
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sit around watching whitey enjoying their best like bennett's infuriating. their marriages stay together, their kids go to school back there courtesy can plug them into a wall on the driveaway. sometimes they take out this fully thanks numbers and letters on it. imputed? [ cheering ] >> our bad for her. when you don't have a point or argument you group. always people all black people because you don't have an argument. if sohn has been socially harassed state his name and say who it is. bring up the charges. it's all this you have no argument it sounded good she made her son but were talking about it. >> cat terrorists is a can group it at the kewpie government employees. government employees can violate a lot of rules and don't get punished. they never get tired i think they mentioned 90 some art --
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some odd charges none of them. >> the oftentimes yes, it's always the not the case and is just white men who fail upwards. has anyone seen what's been going on with joe joe sewall? 1 person? the girl from dense moms and she did this rebrand. and an adult and i'm sexy then she did this and now she does is horrible dance in it so cringe. honestly it can stop watching it. and i'm not alone. at say between 60 and 70% on instagram reels right now is joe joe sewall. >> i know the name smacked of course you do she is feeling upward. honestly if you don't know, yes that's when she was a child star. now she's like i'm sexy now and i'm an adult. it's just not working but it's everywhere. >> what's wrong with failing upward? >> percival i don't know who she
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is or what she is talking about, whole time i thought it was vary bonds and drug. getting all hopped out. that's where i and that was all this. >> you think you should be? >> i do. >> he sat behind me in spanish class in high school and used to cheat off of me. used to kick my desk because he was a year older and lou take spanish together and he would kick my desk. >> that means at your high school you had tom brady and barry bonds -- >> know they had greg gutfeld. [ cheering ] >> tom brady what do we just say, very bonds back lynn swann, greg jeffries. greg gutfeld. [ cheering ]
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galloped out a few other ones but why go there. dew you have the movie we it reminds you of. a white man partner. that's the problem with them being so super drawing the line at racism whatever it is that in this day and age obviously everyone is everywhere. how can she sit there with a straight face representing other americans reporting her biggest cause is the purse rated when it is also all races and then she says a limelight that create i wonder if auc piped up. >> she won't say anything. by the way her boyfriend. that's a white guy failed not. seriously. aunt know what i'm doing right
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now. cohead emily speculated between 21 and 20 the kitchen area back i felt -- >> you're talking about the building known here knows about. >> basically there stairs between the kitchen area and where we all sit and i felt up but with all of a copy. bubble point is i can't mop up biden following up anymore. 's bracket so selfless of you. that was stupid. coming up. number picking up the tab of the wuhan lab. [♪] feeling the breeze instead of feeling congested. [♪] fast relief of allergies with nasal congestion, so you can breathe better. claritin plus decongestant. live claritin clear®. ♪ imagine a future where plastic is not wasted... but instead remade over and over... into the things that keep our food fresher,
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[ ♪♪ ] [ cheering ] >> thank you. thank you. new starting to warm up is in that nice. have you ever come across a story that leaves you speechless with no words and nothing to
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say? that's this next story i will give each guest a bullet point summary and they've got to read it quickly cart digested and that we will discuss it. public if you 2 emily can you share 1 with your friend jim? and you can share them with the young lady to your right you're name is cat. soca jim take a look at that story how do you feel about it? >> while i feel wow a little late." little late. g. we are not good at fund the lieutenant institute of spreading the biggest disaster in human history that locked down dark forest needles. you will not go to the ballgame. he will not have educating. but you know what we aren't
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going to fund them anymore with your tax dollar. acting that's a little late. >> that's why i have no words. cat they finally cut taxpayer funding of the nonprofit group called eco- health as jim pointed out. link to the covid lab period do you think it's too little too late? only 12 million dead. >> they paused it. we wouldn't want to be too hasty. i feel like the government is bad at being generous with money i would say and i've made some mistakes myself before. >> you have? care to share? >> you arty know. >> sorry about that. a lab leak was called a racist conspiracy theory but we can blame it on a chinese wet market that somehow wasn't racist. yachts chinese weather eating but it's not there lab i'm okay.
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sounded like you jim. >> bowsprit ego. let me with these on. all take a look. the [ bleep ] alright no direct link to the pandemic has been established. [ laughter ] [ cheering ] >> back to you greg. >> thank you i like a good finger after the show the editors how to blur it. so when you do that moving you're hand around could make the difference of like 6 hours for them. >> just to be clear in the future don't do this billy this. >> don't do that! see that is just malicious. >> i'm trying to learn.
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>> alright. emily. it took them this long to make the call. if people like us and not being pointing this out they probably would have never done it. had to say over and over why are you still funding this lovely wiry still fun and is likely and they are saying is really important research brackets are the important research. we need another pandemic before the election. >> and they will pat themselves on the back i did stop at, i did take action. when you read the actual decision it reads like the biggest pinball machine ever. 1 million words and then i decided, that we just -- extended that we did this. it was an emergency and it was obvious. this evidence was in front of our faces and in our mounts on this network years ago. showed someone should have said then and it. that's the problem with this invertebrate president. all of our tax dollars have been wasted with 0 accountability and it was in front of them the entire time. thank about how many almost
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government shutdown to him through. every time it was at a budget time back all that wasted time and wasted money and we are still funding this, still funding shims on treadmills? >> ashrams on treadmills. >> i thank the provost of shrimps is true. oil is shrimp. >> it's in my head. >> israel. they are actually running like this. the sickly beef and pear double stop now. up next, more likely to be pals if they don't chase the same dels. ♪ rise up this morning, ♪
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[ cheering ] >> 5 more words. [ ♪♪ ] [ cheering ] >> male friends like different women. alright emily this is pretty amazing and new study found men are more lately to be friends with each other if they don't share the same taste in women because competition creates urchin. is this true with the females? >> i didn't think about that part but ethic it's true for the guys. 100% it sort of like that seen in greece when everyone runs on the dance floor and go to their natural dance partner. so in the bar if i'm standing with my tall skinny blonde
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brands than is just. >> but all the women love a little greg gutfeld -- gutfeld! >> yearly exception that throws out the window. >> that's troop or jim what about homosexuals? [ laughter ] >> what about the homosexuals? >> that's a he asked her about men that's a. [ laughter ] >> a pretty bad question. sometimes i just like to ask what about the homosexuals? says here in the bible. d. by the whole topic men can be friends with each other if they like similar women? >> been married for almost 31 years so in the single days of my free agency all i remember is i hated going out with a guy who
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is good-looking. i already knew i'm getting all the sloppy leftovers. i would wait patiently for them to all flock onto him and then as each little bird would fly away i grab on like a he is a dirty little bird anyway. >> like corruption under? 's. >> i just saw had lost a. rub is this big guy had him i have him in the height. >> ihit tall people. attire is. the abydos? >> know this is stupid. first of all men don't have a type we have what is an area. that's number 1. a defence and our emotions, financial and how willing she is not to talk. and when it comes to your best friend, he loves her you love her cocky aids or you hate or we don't get involved we don't win the middling sandblasting, when she talks its -- it's my brothers grow i don't care.
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we will still be friends when you're gone and you won't drag in me pushed me an argument. know anything about you. you don't go along with him you don't have lunch with them. if you have a male friend who's doing that pick his ass because he is trained to get your girl. >> interesting that makes a lot of sense. i never trust to guys like a. >> is you did a bison doesn't date anybody. >> or you go to the bathroom and come back and he is talking to your woman. that so i hanging around with cabo. i save the best for last. he must have some incredible knowledge on this topic. >> i agree with you i don't get surreal because it doesn't prove what people think is just men who have time to attend the study. is not representative. been too busy working and watching videos of jojo, steve. right? she is a dream guess to my podcast i watch that video 8000
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times. >> what's the starter kit? >> jane guest on my podcast less spice things up. she does the thing like... it's the whole internet you are missing it. >> i know what i'm doing tonight. >> i'm so tells you have something hours of content to watch for the first time. >> that's what i'm doing after the show. be right back. [ cheering ] you know, i spend a lot of time thinking about dirt. at three in the morning. any time of the day. what people don't know is that not all dirt is the same. you need dirt with the right kind of nutrients. look at this new organic soil from miracle-gro. everybody should have it. it worked great for us. this is as good as gold in any garden. if people only knew that it really is about the dirt.
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[ cheering and applause ] >> trace: good evening i'm trace gallagher up you

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