[♪♪] quick programming note, next week we will be live from the republican national convention, we will be in milwaukee. this sunday night, special edition of hannity, 9:00 pm eastern on the rnc in milwaukee, you hope -- we hope you will join us. that is all the time we have left. as always, thank you for being with us on making the show possible. please set your dvr's so you never miss an episode of hannity. in the meantime let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld standing by to put a smile on your face. we will see you sunday night from milwaukee. have a great weekend. [♪♪] [ cheering ] [♪♪] [♪♪]

>> greg: yes, i know, i know, i know! i know. i know, i know. i know. cheese. i am too good for you. it's friday so you know what that means, let's welcome tonight guests, he's the guy who runs the convertible sebring, fox and friends first host todd piro. she's got southern charm and can do you harm, a host of the bottom line, dagen mcdowell. he's like his razor blades, easily replaceable. comedian and founder of western razor company, david angelo.

and her favorite bedtime story is the bill of rights. new york times best-selling author and fox news contributor kat timpf. all right. before we get to some news stories, let's do this. [♪♪] >> announcer: greg's leftovers >> greg: yeah. leftovers, where i read the jokes we did not use this weekend as always it's my first time reading them so if they sock we'll make joe mackie sleep injuring others pants. it was a rough day for joe biden as he called zelenskyy putin and kamala harris trump. i've done the same thing. just the other day i mistakingly called joy behar. but it's like referring to joe

biden as the president. yes, yes. last night's press conference, biden's opening remarks were about proudly being in a nato, leading nato members to say, we have to get out of nato. joe also blamed his staff for adding things all the time to his schedule. you know, thanks like breathing, putting on pants and wiping the drool off his face. he also told reporters that kamala harris is qualified to be president. after all, like him, she's also brain-dead. gets worse. the dnc chair claims that last night joe put on a master class. master class? maybe if the class is titled how

to terrify world leaders by having nuclear weapons and dementia. biden supporters claim the president did not completely ball met the presser on thursday their evidence, he did not ask lloyd austin to park his car. racist. very racist. last night when a reporter asked biden how he would respond to donald trump, mocking joe biden's age and his memory, joe said, listen to him. i think people are, joe. sources say the president hasn't met with his cabinet in nine months. although he did have a 45 minute conversation with a credenza. credenza. never knew what that was. earlier this week biden dismissed concerns about his

mental acuity and said he would drop out only if lord almighty told him to. but i did, said one man. yeah. a radio station admitted to editing an interview with joe after his campaign asked they remove answers that made him sound foolish. listeners were tipped off to the consecutive minutes of silence. this week, view cohost whoopi goldberg said she'd still vote for joe biden even if he poops his pants. a biden spokesperson replied, consider it done. one after the other. we are packed tonight. according to a new survey, 24% think biden is mentally sharp.

the other 76% of voters think that 24% is retarted. i did not say it, they did. earlier this week president trump accepted biden's challenge to play golf but then joe changed his mind because he's already had enough strokes. nbc news reports that the president relies more and more on advice from his son hunter. that explains the new ceiling mirror in the lincoln bedroom. devin bacon hired a makeup artist to disguise him as a regular person to see what it would be like not to be famous. i did the same thing that time i disguised myself as brian killed made. finally a couple was arrested at

a georgia mexican restaurant when a man attempted to funnel a margarita down the pot of his wife. apparently he forgot to of the rim. -- to salt the rim -- all right. yeah. won't get that on special report. to the news. so trump is not adolf hitler, making the democrats full of shitler. he's the worst thing that could happen to the world, worth the nuclear war, soccer, having to share a bathroom with whoopi goldberg. he's a nazi, a dictator, authoritarian. he leave the toilet seat up, doesn't close his mouth when chewing and has sex with ugly born stars.

but it turns out the democrats really don't think that at all. at least not behind closed doors. new york times writer as root -- ezra klein is revealing what the democrats are privately telling him. >> it would be quite unpleasant for me personally to come out against the president, as an elected official of the democratic party, and weighing what would happen if donald trump wins and saying i can live with donald trump winning. i've had top democrats say to me basically something like i don't know why democrats are acting the way they are. away -- reason i'm acting the way i am is because i don't think that. >> greg: you are telling me the democrats were lying? that's a -- as surprising as chris christie ordering two desserts. why do you like those jokes?

but it's worse than lying. the trump is hitler hoax was also a dangerous lie that demanded action by those who believed it. because if you are convinced you are fighting hitler, you have the moral imperative to stop him at any cost. you could lie, cheat, punch, harass. after all to obey laws when fighting hitler, that would be immoral. the result, they created a monster that was as real as the trump hitler hoax was not. they became that hateful monster. but this hoax is the peak on the pyramid of hoaxes that are now all collapsing because they were all dependent on each other. the foundational hoaxes that created the evil trump smith, a nazi lover who says you should drink bleach while collaborating with russians, that gave us the trump is an existential risk hoax which gave us the biden is fine hoax, which prompted the cover ups and of course the cheap fake hoaxes.

but knock one down and they all follow. the lesson for all of us, when a hoax appears, you need to run right at it. when you take one out, you will always find a dozen other hoaxes depending on it. that is the thing with hoaxes. democrats believe there is safety in numbers. this should upset you but it should upset democrat voters most. imagine believing all this [ bleep ]. you are either duped, naïve or just plain stupid which is all you need to do to keep supporting joe. that and a lot of drugs. all right. it's the note high time. fresh off of work, heading to the local lounge, tossed back a few, then i'm going to go golf, oh to brooks brothers, to other white people things.

>> i can't believe i escaped the monolog unscathed. >> greg: i decided to go light on you because later i am going to destroy you. what did you make of the ezra klein admitting that trump isn't really hitler and that they knew that all along? >> there are two parts to that. i will break these democrats into two categories. normal and really liberal. a lot of people say there is no normal democrat but hear me out. they are like the regular republican, the regular independent, the regular american. they know deep down donald trump wants lower taxes, lower crime, a closed border, and they know that that platform is not a threat to democracy. even though they have to, you know, put the party line out there. it's the far lefties for whom open borders, socialism and having criminals rome free-throw the country terrorizing is their dream of democracy.

so when you view democracy is that, yes, donald trump is a threat, but that's not democracy, that's insanity and donald trump has pointed that out and you are so right to point out he runs into the hoax, shoots it down and that is why he's about to have a convention where he crushes it. the democrats are struggling right now, their entire party is in disarray, it's why the republicans are on top right now >> greg: there you go. spoken like a true aging golf pro. doesn't he look like that? do you think the democrats will learn a lesson or are they going to keep pumping out the hoaxes? >> i think what ezra klein said is the hoax. i think that this feels like a planted story to get donald trump and his team to let their guard down. knowing what they've done in the

past. it's don't worry, the democrats no longer see you as a threat. they are no longer out to get you. after the dossier, russian collusion hoax that went on for years, which nancy pelosi was talking about two days ago, and the legal warfare, the vast legal warfare up and down the coast [ bleep ] that. the coast is not clear for donald trump in any way, shape, or form, so we've seen the caterwauling on the tv, the unhinged and unmedicated, those are sirens sure but it's always been what we cannot hear and cannot see by the democrats that has always been the danger. because they won't try to maintain control and power by any means necessary -- will try to -- and on that note, joe biden ought to be walking around in a memory foam onesie because

the big swinging scrote of his party, you know they are planning a slip and fall. hey joe, how about a midnight putting run? and then he's in a coma. >> greg: it's true, i agree. >> greg: it feels like the makings of a colombo episode, the first segment when they meet with the aging president and then he slips in the bathtub and there's no witnesses. david angelo, you are an astute political observer, i'm dying to here what you think is going on with these hoaxes. >> ultimately i'm just a humble razor salesman, right, i don't want to oversell it. the hoaxes, it's been everything , trump is a russian agent, we went through that for

a couple years, hunter's laptop, then joe biden is fine, we did that, then recently they dropped the guard on that. so you could say he's hitler but if someone is really bad, you don't compare him to -- he was already president, you can't really scare us into, like, we already did this, we've seen this movie before. if he was really bad, you don't need to compare -- they weren't comparing hitler to hitler, you know what i mean? >> greg: that's true. >> no one in germany was like this adolf hitler guy, he could be the next leopold the third, you know,. he was hitler. there was no comparison. >> greg: that's true. we need like a before hitler and after hitler. >> basically what it is. >> greg: that's an interesting

point. i think this whole thing fell apart because they did not think it through. if trump was the existential risk, why are you putting mister magoo up against him? that was how it all fell apart. >> biden said it himself in that interview, he said himself, how would you feel if you run and trump wins and biden said i would feel okay as long as i knew i did my best. if i were the one man standing between the world and hitler and hitler got pass me, i would not be like well, i gave it 110%. and then off to panera. but i think the really sad part about all of this, there are some people who i do think believe it, you can see them being afraid of this which doesn't make sense because we

already saw a trump presidency. so then people will see the other side, the voters, not just people with whom they disagree about, like, you actually don't care. if i'm going to end up in a camp, and it does horrible things to our relationships with each other. it's not like this is just a zero something where the only thing that that stake's politics. it's actual real relationships and families and among friends that are affected by this. and it's so infuriating. >> greg: it's not like you disagree on bands. it's like -- >> you don't care about my humanity. >> greg: you want me to diet. >> they want me to be put -- i've seen that earnestly said by people, they seem serious. >> greg: you know what's a good come back? yeah, a fat camp. >> why the fat joke? >> here's how unserious

democrats are about protecting democracy, they are currently -- joe biden won the primary, they are trying to coup him right now. they are in the middle of a coup to push him out. so they don't care. he's the guy. this is an insurrection. >> greg: it really is. the republicans have one, like, pop-up insurrection, you know, they did not even know what they were doing. these guys have been doing it forever. >> did you just call january 6th a pop-up? crazy. >> greg: shop online! up next, biden is a mess in front of the press. hey. you seein' this? wait... where's the dish? there ain't one. you're tellin' me you can get directv — the good stuff — and you don't need a satellite dish? oh, i used to love doin' my business on those things! you're one sick pigeon.

them dishes kept the rain off our beaks! we just have different priorities is all. satellite-free directv... never thought i'd see the day. well, our lifespans are quite short... stream directv without a satellite dish. i'm going to do this thing with my neck, just for a bit.

[♪♪] ♪ video of the day ♪ >> greg: she came in on her day off to here biden struggle and cough. our video of the day comes from rachel maddow. ahead of last night's presidential press conference. you remember rachel, she played officer jim reid in the classic cop show. love that show. got his autograph in a car show and 76. look it up. according to rachel, the stakes could not get higher. roll it. >> this is going to be not a speech or interview but a press conference where he will take questions, he does not know what they are in advance, he will have to stand on his own feet in

realtime with no teleprompter. but it happens at a time when i don't think it's an exaggeration to say that, you know, the fate of the world hangs in the balance. >> greg: that was before the presser. so how did the world to do? let's just say there's never been a better time to move to mars. >> ladies and gentlemen, president putin. president putin. he's going to be president putin, president zelenskyy's. >> i will take your questions, had been given a list of people to call on. >> no one is saying that, no poll says that. >> i would not of picked vice president trump to be vice president if i did not think she was qualified to be president. i'm following the advice of my commander-in-chief, might -- might -- the chief of staff of the military. this is -- well, anyway. >> misspoke in your earlier

answer referring to vice president harris as vice president trump. right now donald trump is using that to mock your age and memory. how do you combat that criticism? >> listen to him. >> greg: hate to tell you, world, you are [ bleep ] out of luck. but that did not stop the white house from gas lighting you like a high school bunsen burner. white house spokesperson andrew bates road on x "to answer the question on everyone's mind, no, joe biden does not have a doctorate in foreign affairs, he's just that [ bleep ] good. you know, i don't think that question was on anybody's mind. he was just that [ bleep ] good. tell that to the people in afghanistan before they fell off a flying c1 30.

you know it's amazing, the democrats think, like, they say this is a win because he did not collapse but in a way, it's a loss because now they are stuck with him. at least the breakup will now be longer. >> right. and the media was back in the bag of the biden camp so they were not actually doing a favor to the democrats who wanted joe biden to dig your to flee fall on his face because they went back to straight fawning. the first question last night was, your political future has hung over the nato summit, a little bit, this week. how good you reassure the american people you won't have more bet nights? what kind of questions are those? just ask him. in february you were taking a blood thinner, cholesterol and nasal spray for allergies, those

were your prescription meds. what other prescriptions are you taking now? do you not know? how many pills are in your hand at night before you go to bed? do you couch them? who gives them to you? chill, hunter? are you taking any shots that we know of. and i'm not talking about the injections you are getting in your face. by the way, what are you getting shot in your face? you look like you have something a little bit firmer going on. >> greg: david, an interesting pivot, you had all of these 80 of people panicking. how are they going to explain this to their audience? >> their audience, msnbc, it's pretty easy, they are more and -- morons to begin with, you can kind of our lie on that. but also their whole thing was

joe biden needs to step down, he's not capable of doing the job. every single person at nbc news needs to resign. the past eight years, their journalistic track record. russian collusion, they knew it was fake the entire time, the laptop, covid origin, every major story of the past eight years they have been wrong so how are they going to even criticize joe biden who is, as i've said, a halloween decoration, when they are the worst people at their job? >> greg: so true. what is the temperature today in new york, 93? i love the fact that you are just wearing a thick cardigan. is this in honor of judd hirsch? >> i'm just leaning into the old guy thing. working for joe, maybe i can get some of that. >> greg: maybe you can get a dr jill. you know joe like somehow

prolonged to the relationship back like he knew he was going to get dumped. it's like a guy who knows he's going to get dumped and all of a sudden he starts bathing and bringing you flowers. he thinks i think i've got this, but is just putting it off. >> i honestly think that the thing to think about from last night and, you know, his presser was not so much how he did but how we all felt watching it. like, it was nerve-racking. you are watching it like, okay. every single one of us, it's like you are watching someone play a game of jencko for their life. >> greg: yes! >> which becomes more crazy when you realize that what you are watching him to that has you that nervous is reading. that's not normal! like okay, he got that one.

reading. everyone is like, we'll that was pretty good reading he did there. am i going crazy or is that quite the lobar? sure he said some things off the cuff, a lot of it was prepared. >> greg: always like trailing off to the word anyway. anyway... anyway... but todd, he kind of laced his performance in the worst possible position for a democrat because if he fell flat on his face, they could get out, but now he just -- he just -- he just breathed enough. >> that's why trump last night was like this is great, i'm winning. that was a great night for trump. the voters, those of us who will decide this election, they did not think last night was good. who thought last night was good?

the democrat enablers in the white house like bates and the democrat enablers in the media like rachel maddow are like you know what, you put on a foreign-policy clinic like we know he can do because his last 50 years have been a foreign-policy tour de force. what is tour de force about this? killing all those people in afghanistan? allowing hamas and russia to say now is the time to invade? and we reported on multiple times, robert bates said joe biden has been wrong on every single foreign-policy decision, and that's obama's guy. so the gas lighting to rehabilitate what the media did to joe biden over two weeks is in full force. it is counterbalanced by all of these democratic senators and congressmen who are like we are out. the big take away, this is disarray. i go back to what i said in the last block, republicans need to jump on this because for the first time in a while, you

republicans aren't losing your heads over a speaker vote, the democrats are the ones in disarray and looking like a cluster f of epic proportions. take advantage of it next week. >> greg: all right. >> i'm a one trick pony today. >> greg: yes! maybe i will buy an acura from this man. just give me your card, i will call you. up next, a stripper bared her thighs but did she tell some lies? when the sawdust settles and the engine roars the thing you care about is a job well done. but when you get your tools from harbor freight something about the job feels different - your wallet. whatever you do, do it for less, at harbor freight. ♪ always dry scoop before you run. listen to me, the hot dog diet got me shredded.

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stripper lied. david, in arkansas man swing in las vegas stripper for $38 million, alleging she do prodded him out of $3 million while pretending to be his exclusive girlfriend for a decade. alleges the stripper had another boyfriend in vegas, surprise, while she allegedly pretended to be this man's girlfriend. how would you rule? you are a strip club aficionado. you like to just go there and hang out at the bar. >> yeah, you know, i go up there. a lot of people, you know, they think strip clubs or demeaning to women but i disagree, i think they are empowering. the one i go to, they have a big sign out front that says live, girls. and i think that's nice. kind of inspirational.

nice to go out every now and then. this guy, i think he made a mistake. i would look to be the defense attorney in this. your honour,, she's a stripper. case closed. i mean, she's a stripper, your honour,. >> greg: that would be great, if they had entered into evidence one of her lap dances. the judge would like to see her perform to see. all right, kat, you are a relationship expert. do you think the guy has a case? how do you define exclusivity if you are a left answer? you are sharing your lap with other men. >> i love how he described it as a "extensive fraudulent scheme." that describes like every relationship i had in my twenties. none of them were with strippers though.

but i think it would have been healthier if they were because that's a little more up front. you don't need to ask how was your day at work, you kind of got an idea. >> greg: that's how we met! no, that's how he met the stripper. >> exactly. you been to her work. >> greg: exactly. i wonder if they have a take your daughter to work day at strip clubs. they call it recruitment. todd, i bet you could name three strip clubs off the top of your head. >> i'm going to be quiet and commercial breaks from now on. >> greg: name three strip clubs. >> i refuse. sapphire, spearmint rhino, stilettos. continue. >> greg: don't clap for that. have you ever been hoodwinked or lead on player stripper when they said you smell nice? >> weight, that's not true? >> greg: when they tell you you are different from the others. >> i am different!

what i love about this, and i put my legal had on? >> greg: you are a lawyer! >> so what this gentleman is saying is he gave money to a young lady that he thought was interested in him and now he wants the money back. isn't that called dating? what am i missing here? and in the weirdest of weird scenarios where a judge let's this go past the summary judgement stage, which means this case actually goes on, and in some way the guy wins, what happens to the sugar daddy industry? this is literally the foundation of the sugar daddy industry. >> greg: so true. >> those sugar girls based upon my intensive research on the fox news computers tonight, which was a questionable decision, basically says, like, these sugar girls have a lot of daddies, they are not exclusive and they are making a lot of money. i'm going to get fired because of that search, are tied?

>> greg: no, no, hr is really good with that. dagen, i'm doing the math, the guy spent $3 million on this, on lap dances,'s groin must be sent it down to a nub. do you know any strippers, female strippers that is? i did not want to get personal but i mean. >> since i'm passed a half century mark, they are no longer stripping. why did you ask me that? >> i figured you're like me, you know people on the street, you slum around. i'm of the people, rich people but go ahead. >> they are like all professional women. since you did not ask me, my favorite is in daytona beach.

i read the entire court filing on this. she was his girlfriend for a decade. she's actually not young. she's now in her -- she's well past her mid-forties. she -- he met her when she was in her mid thirties. she got $3 million in cash and a home at a busy intersection in a not great art of town for $720,000 and he's suing for 35 million in punitive damages. 's biggest problem is he does not have friends to tell him don't go to the strip club to meet your girlfriend and then don't publicly sue her for $35 million when you find out that she's cheating on your stupid ass. >> greg: well i think we learned -- >> and by the way it worked out to. >> hundred $50,000 a year. that is a bargain.

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>> announcer: a story in five words. >> greg: a idea codes your dog sparks. this is amazing. university of michigan researchers are using a itech that was originally for human speech to analyse how dogs communicate and could one day help us talk to animals. do you believe this? >> i can already decode my dog sparks. barking by the door, you'd like to go outside. barking at a skateboard, he doesn't like it. barking by the bed, he wants to come up on the bed. i don't think he's socrates. >> greg: that's a good name for a dog, socrates.

todd. would you think this is helpful in your life? >> very much. >> greg: what if you found out the dog doesn't like you? >> that would be much like this panel today. >> let's feel sorry for todd you boy. >> that's my dog name. in the vein of kat, which sounded weird too, their parks mean they are hungry or they need to pay. back to you, greg. >> greg: you know why this theory that ai could be done with all sounds, not just lifeforms, what if you are noises coming from your car or a bump in the night or a sound you are making in your stomach, you could point the ai added. >> yes. >> greg: thank you. >> no. i do not want to know what your stomach is saying.

and i don't want to know what my dog is saying. i've had two husbands for that. >> greg: david? >> i think you are right. they are building a datacentre out in wyoming now. hopefully they will be able to decode what biden said on thursday. thank you, good night. thank you, thank you. >> greg: up next, viewer mail.

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[♪♪] yep, you are watching mailing it in.

>> greg: darren asks, who and when did you first realize that one of your childhood heroes was full of [ bleep ]? todd, who was your childhood hero? >> when i got my first tv job i had to interview who -- he we louis and i thought he could've handled me with a bit more respect and honor. once the interview was over, i turned to him and said the following, you maybe he we louis but i'm the [ bleep ] news. now this actually did not happen that way. over 15 years that's how the story evolved. he was actually kind of nice i just needed a joke. back to you, greg. >> greg: talk about transparency. you've met a lot of famous people, dagen. >> the most disappointing, david lee roth. teeny. jumping off the drum kits. he's tiny. and he had a very wet handshake.

>> greg: he looks like he could be selling indoor pools or something. i don't know. why did i say that? >> as opposed to an outdoor pool? >> greg: i don't even know what that meant but i'm going to think about it all weekend. >> i know what it means, spas. he's damp. >> greg: he's damp. that's where i was going, i just had indoor pools. angelo. >> i grew up idolizing harvey weinstein. what he did with miramax and the independent film community, it's still hard. >> greg: kat. >> when i was little i used to really like to watch barney and then my dad told me that since barney was on pbs it was government propaganda. it's true.

explains a lot, doesn't it? >> greg: it makes a lot of sense too. i would almost say i grew up with sesame street an hour watch it and it's not the same. all right. you sound like the riddler. we will go to break. i don't know what's going on, we will be right back. [instructor] hold it! hold it! hard time holding it? well always discreet absorbs up to a cup full. with up to zero wet feel and odor. so i'm not just dry, i'm jump squats level dry. we've got you, always. always discreet. did i read this? did i get eggs? where are my keys? memory and thinking issues keep piling up? it may be due to a buildup of amyloid plaques in the brain. visit morethannormalaging.com how do you keep your teeth so white

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>> greg: todd piro, dagen mcdowell, david angelo, kat timpf, our studio audience, "fox news @ night" with trace gallagher is coming up. i love you, america.