tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC December 14, 2023 11:35pm-12:37am PST
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on the top news sidebar at abc seven news.com, and a reminder you can watch all our newscasts live and on demand through the abc seven bay area connected tv app available for apple tv, google tv, amazon fire tv and roku. >> download the app now so you can start streaming. thank you so much for watching tonight. >> i'm ama daetz and i'm dan ashley for spencer christian, larry biel, all of us. we appreciate your time right now on jimmy kimmel live! >> zac efron, have a great night, everyone. previously on "jimmy kimmel live" -- >> we're good! >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- zac efron. jason mantzoukas.
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and music from queens of the stone age. with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: thank you. appreciate it. thank you very much. welcome. well, that's very nice. very nice. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us on what is our last new show of 2023. on behalf of all of us, of the band, of everybody, we are grateful we are able to do this show. that is entirely because of you. we have a lot of fun doing it, right guillermo? >> guillermo: that's right, jimmy, we have a lot of fun, yeah! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: have you been drinking tonight? >> guillermo: of course, jimmy are it's the last day. >> jimmy: some of us have more fun doing the show than others. i want to take a minute
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to wish you and your families a very happy holiday. even the losers and haters. [ laughter ] merry christmas. we look forward to getting back at it in what undoubtedly will be a crazy year. first, we have celebrating to do. we have our staff holiday party after the show tonight. [ cheers ] which is going to be a very fancy affair. i hope dave and buster are ready for us! [ laughter ] christmas came early for baseball fans here in l.a. today, the press gathered at dodger stadium for the official introduction of new dodgers' superstar, shohei ohtani. [ cheers and applause ] he signed the biggest deal in the history of professional sports. he will get $700 million over 10 years. but he won't get most of it until the contract is over. he'll only get about $2 million a year, then $680 million at the end. it's a very smart move by the dodgers. to defer the money until 2033 when the state of california will be underwater anyway. [ laughter ] and at the other end of the sports salary stick,
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draymond green, of the golden state warriors, has been suspended indefinitely for yet another violent incident. the warriors played phoenix tuesday. in the third quarter of the game, draymond wildly slapped the center for the suns, and now it's going to cost him a lot of money. >> i mean, as i've said before, any replay, you know -- if i go look at every replay of everything -- a replay is -- it's never going to look good. you know, but -- i know my intentions and my intentions were to sell the call. and also i don't think i'm an accurate enough puncher to do a full 360 and connect with someone. so -- it's unfortunate. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. he's basically one glass of chardonnay away from being a real housewife. [ laughter ] draymond was suspended in april for stepping on a guy. he was suspended five games in november for choking rudy gobert. and what makes this one even
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nuttier is he made a tv show where he worked with deepak chopra to learn to meditate and control his rage. [ laughter ] it's called "the sessions," and i guess it doesn't work. is what we've learned. [ laughter and applause ] so now, draymond is off the court for i don't know how long, nobody knows how long. but the good news is, he just got signed by the anaheim ducks. to play hockey. [ laughter ] you especially hate to see this around the holidays. i mean, even donald trump is toning it down. i don't know if it's the christmas spirit or what is going on, but for once he actually had some nice words to say about joe biden. >> joe biden is a low iq individual, and he is truly the worst, most incompetent, and most corrupt president in the history of the united states. >> jimmy: hold on. i think i was thinking of a different donald trump. [ laughter ] this one is a jerk. this was really funny. at an event in coralville, iowa, trump issued a stark warning about what would happen to the u.s. economy should president biden serve another term. >> if we're not elected, we'll
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have a depression the likes of which i don't believe anybody has ever seen. maybe 1929. that's what's going to happen. >> jimmy: meanwhile, three hours before he said those words, he was apparently unaware that this is what was happening on wall street. [ bell ringing ] >> that bell marks a new record high for the dow jones closing above 37,000 for the first time ever. >> jimmy: a record high for the w me. when it went above 30,000 back in 2020, he was patting himself on the back like a monkey eating bugs off his shoulder blades. [ laughter ] now we're headed toward a depression. that's our trump. if it's hot, he says it's cold. if it's black, he says it's white. if it's a funeral, he sings "happy birthday." [ laughter ] it's the opposite. unemployment is down to 3.7%. inflation is down to 3.1%. gas is $3.10 a gallon, but this biden is terrible! he's leading us to a depression! [ laughter ] trump asked supporters on wednesday to name one thing that has gotten better under biden. i don't know.
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there's a lot. i can think of a lot, but i think maybe number one is we're drinking less bleach? [ laughter ] [ applause ] but he says this kind of stuff because the people who go to his rallies actually believe it. >> all the elites, they do not care about us little people. president trump really does. he really cares. he's working for god. >> what is it about trump that you love so much? >> number one, he's a godly man. he's working for god. for darn sure. no matter what they try to do to stop him, he's going to come back. because he's working for god, and god's on his side. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: absolutely, right. he's working for god. and he cares about the little people. the only little people trump cares about are the keebler elves. [ laughter ] the ones who bring him his fudge stripes every morning. [ laughter ] how many of you are traveling for the holidays? a lot of people are. more americans are expected to travel this christmas than any time over the past four years. and while going home for
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christmas can be fun, it can also be a challenge. especially for those in the gay community. and while i have no advice to offer on that subject, one of our writers does. his name is louis virtel who is here now to "virtel it like it is." louis? [ cheers and applause ] >> so, you're queer! congratulations! and you're going home for christmas. hooray! [ laughter ] some families are easy. some have a gay pioneer like uncle roger, god bless him, who blazed a trail that probably killed grandma, but got everyone else onboard. [ laughter ] others are not. and for those kinds of families, i'm going to teach you how to deal. step one -- pick a movie for your family to watch. [ laughter ] maybe not this one. maybe this one. or this one.
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[ cheers ] [ or this one. [ cheers ] she seems fun. pick something you'll all like. movies chill everyone out. whether you've got an amazing mom who goes to pride parades, and asks you whether dan levy from "schitt's creek" is a twink or a bear. "mom, i think he's just canadian." or a scary dad who wanted you to be a cop -- [ laughter ] sexy. two hours of not talking at the movies is just the time-killer you need. when nicole kidman says, "we come to this place for magic." that means, "thank jesus. it's time for aunt sharon to finally shut up." [ laughter ] step two -- take the gang to a local bar. you know that little spot back home next to the dollar tree where long island iced teas are still $4 and the floor hasn't been cleaned since "designing women" went off the air? [ laughter ] don't go there. that's where you'll run into dean, the homophobe bully from
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middle school who went bald at 25 and comes up to you and says, "bro, i'm cool with who you are now." thank you, bro. and i'm cool with who you are now. because i saw you on grindr. [ moans, laughter and applause ] and finally. the most important tip of all, find another gay person. [ laughter ] no matter how small your town is, the government has placed various gay embassies around the country -- [ laughter ] where at least one gay person must be stationed at all times. these places are called starbucks. [ laughter and applause ] i don't know why the gay community settled on starbucks. maybe it's if you play enough norah jones in one place for long enough, we gather. [ laughter ] i don't know. but the fact is starbucks is to gays what the waffle house is to the meth community. [ laughter ] now, if your town is too small for a starbucks, where do you go? dairy queen.
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[ laughter ] there he is. tell him louis says hi. other than that, pack light, bring a book, and wave to the nice barber who gave you a bowl cut until you were 9. [ laughter ] hi, stan. so good luck, fellow travelers. that's how you make the yuletide as gay as possible, without having to storm out and spend christmas eve at the airport ramada by wyndham. [ laughter ] and remember, if it does all go south? look in the drawer where you used to hide that copy of "freshman" magazine, okay? there's a $20 bill there. and worse comes to worst? that equals five long island iced teas. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, louis. happy holidays. i wish you many frappucinos. and one more item as warm and wonderful as the christmas season can be, it can also be dangerous. more people die from accidents
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the week leading up to christmas than all the other weeks combined. that's not true, it's a lie, i made it up. [ laughter ] but i did it to warm you up for a new, special holiday edition of "breaking the news." [ cheers and applause ] >> breaking the news! holiday edition! >> what the [ bleep ], bro? >> does dreaming of a white christmas make you a racist? >> what? no. >> this racist explains why not. tonight. >> what? >> try this. do you celebrate kwanzaa? >> no. >> racism. it's on the rise. and the holidays are no different. >> news alert! >> we're here with local shoppers at the mall. how is everyone's christmas
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shopping going? >> we love it. >> excellent. >> it's fantastic. >> why should anyone care what you people have to say? >> well, because -- >> not interested! >> everybody's favorite holiday dish with a twist. horse ham. the norwegian tradition comes to the states. >> smoked baby pony! >> i have explosive diarrhea. why so many locals are saying this after eating warm horse ham. >> i have never tried horse ham. >> i'll get you some. all right, give horse ham a try. is that a >> yea! >> watch out for that explosive diarrhea tonight at 11:00. >> whoa, nelly! >> holiday shopping in hollywood, you never know who you'll run into. here with the lead of the
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"dallas buyers club." how are you doing? >> doing well, sir, how about you? >> well, i don't have aids. the latest victim of cancer culture. why some still think it's permission for kissing. make out with your wife. put it over your heads. mwah, mwah, a little higher, mwah! >> mistle-tongue! >> nothing says holiday than family gathered around the tree. how quickly can this christmas fir turn into fiery fiasco? holiday tips after the break. hold that for me, honey? i'll show how quickly a tree can catch fire. stay right there. just stay right there. okay, you guys are doing great. and we're back with my holiday safety tips. stay close to the tree. come on. just one second, guys.
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a little closer to the tree. great. >> and this! >> the hottest gift of the year, cymbals! find out where you can pick up a pair tonight at 11:00. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we've got a fun show tonight. jason mantzoukas is here. we have music from queens of the stone age, and we'll be right back with zac efron.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: tonight, a very funny man whom you can see in the new disney plus show "percy jackson and the olympians." jason mantzoukas is with us. [ cheers ] then later, a rock and roll band from palm desert, california. their latest album is also my go-to font "in times new roman." [ laughter ] music from queens of the stone age. [ cheers and applause ] you can see queens of the stone age live at the forum here in l.a. on saturday night. our first guest is a talented former teen heartthrob, now adult heartthrob, who squeezes into spandex in the new movie "the iron claw."
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>> and a devastating shock to the lower back puts kevin on the map. he's lining up a big shot. he returns the punch, touch, touch, and three times, pretty hard on that one. coming off the ropes with a clothesline. kevin again off the ropes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "the iron claw" opens in theaters a week from friday. say hello to zac efron! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how's it going? >> man, i was worried. >> jimmy: i was worried you were going to come out here -- [ cheers and applause ] put me on the ropes. can i ask you a quick question
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before we get into the interview? when people show up with "high school musical" paraphernalia -- [ laughter ] is that appreciated? yes or no? >> oh, man, it's always appreciated. [ cheers and applause ] go, wildcats! [ cheers ] >> jimmy: man, you got huge for this movie, huh? >> yeah, did a lot of push-ups. >> jimmy: jeremy allen white was here, he said he was embarrassed standing next to you because he seemed very small. he felt he was muscular and fit, then he'd stand next to you and felt he was a waiter or something. [ laughter ] maybe not in those exact words, but you get the idea. >> that's so funny. yeah, i mean, like -- the story's all about these brothers, and it really was about their bond. >> jimmy: the bonn eric family and their dad who was a wrestler of note. i remember these guys. you're probably too young to remember these guys.
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i remember carey von erich, yeah, a big wrestling family. >> yes, long line of wrestlers. their father was a wrestler. it's really an amazing story. they rose to fame so quickly and really changed the whole platform of wrestling. they took it to levels that nobody really had ever seen before. >> jimmy: they also had really, really tough lives in general. >> yeah. the whole family was followed by sort of a curse. >> jimmy: yeah. it did seem like that, or something like that going on. >> yeah. >> jimmy: now, this is -- which one's the real family, which one's you guys? [ laughter ] it's hard to tell. you guys are in particular, that's how we know. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you play kevin von erich, a surviving member of the family. has he seen the movie? >> he has. >> jimmy: what did he think of the movie? >> dude, he loved it. >> jimmy: he loved it? >> he loved it, which meant just everything to me, man. >> jimmy: i bet. were you watching him while he watched the movie? [ laughter ] >> no, that would have been weird. it was awkward enough just
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knowing he was in the room. but yeah, naturally when you're playing somebody real it's like, that's the first thing you think of. what are they going to think of this? >> jimmy: yeah. sometimes you don't care because that person is a villain or is eating people or something like that. [ laughter ] >> yeah, yeah. or ted bundy or something like that. >> jimmy: yeah, right yeah. [ laughter ] >> when we showed up to the premiere, which was in dallas, where a lot of the story takes place, he was there with his whole family. we had a one-on-one chat. >> jimmy: did you fight? [ laughter ] wouldn't that be cool? >> no, but it could have gone that way. oh, man. i was ready for him to be, "dude, you messed that up." >> jimmy: what was it like getting in that ring for the first time? >> i don't even know how to put it into words, man. you sign on to play a wrestler, you know you're in for a bit of -- i don't know," magic mike" scenario, kind of. but there's the moment that it becomes real. and you're out there in front of a huge audience. >> jimmy: oh, so those people
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were really there? >> yeah, a lot of them were real, you know, big wrestling fans. >> jimmy: right. >> but you know, the way we shot the film, we did, like, really long takes. we'd shoot the whole wrestling sequence kind of at the same time. so the matches could be anywhere from 10 to 15 minutes long. we would do the whole thing start to finish. so you would emerge, see the crowd, kind of get into the action of the wrestling. and that was all fine. but then inevitably they call "cut," then you're kind of standing there looking around in your underwear. [ laughter ] you're, like, oiled up. you don't -- honestly, you're trying to figure out what to do after they call "cut" and you don't have the character to rely on or someone to fight. it's like, you don't know how to stand, man. [ laughter ] like, do you cross your legs and lean on the rail? it was -- everywhere you look, everyone's already looking at you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know, it's -- yeah, it was awkward. >> jimmy: it's weird, the whole thing is weird. >> yeah, it was weird.
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>> jimmy: and it's physically demanding also, having to do those takes over and over again, i would think. >> it was. >> jimmy: the wrestlers do it once. if he screw it up, they try again in the next town. >> yeah, yeah. a little bit. we got to work with so many great pro wrestlers on this. that was one of the things that they noticed and talked about. "man, we don't do it this much, actually, you guys do this a lot, you do a lot of takes, man." >> jimmy: you've been doing live performance stuff since you were a little kid, right? what was the first thing you did, the first show? >> oh, man. one of the earlier ones i did was "peter pan." >> jimmy: were you peter pan? >> no. i wasn't peter pan. [ laughter ] i was john. >> jimmy: oh, his little brother. >> yeah. >> jimmy: not little brother -- >> wendy's little brother. >> jimmy: how old were you at this time? >> i must have been 13, 14, something like that. but it was a professional production of pcpc, alan han
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sock college. the christmas show, it's pretty big. but to be a kid in one of those shows is kind of a big deal. it was like, you know -- there's only a couple young people in it. it's all college students. >> jimmy: right. >> good actors and stuff. but we had fly lines. so they would actually pick us up into the air and fly us over the audience. >> jimmy: that's fun. >> and every once in a while that would just go -- bad. >> jimmy: it would, oh. >> like one of the stunts we had was my younger brother, michael, he would drop his teddy bear in the audience. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> and then i would go down and retrieve it from whatever audience member caught it. and one day, a lady grabbed it. i think it was like the seniors show where they get a discount. [ laughter ] so everybody was kind of old. this lady got the bear, and she did not want to let go. [ laughter ] and so i swooped down to grab it, and i couldn't really get it from her. she was kind of like, "no!"
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[ laughter ] and i was like, "uh -- i don't know what to do, i'm about to fly away." i kind of reach for it one more time, and she just pulled me in. [ laughter ] she, like, grabbed me, like "no!" and i got yanked into her. then the fly line guys yanked and i kind of flew away. and when i flew away, i wasn't holding a teddy bear, i was holding her hair, her wig. [ moans and laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: wow, wow. well, i hope she learned a valuable lesson is on that day. >> i will never know. >> jimmy: zac efron is here. his movie is "the iron claw." we'll be right back. >> lou: portions of "jimmy kimmel live!" are brought to you by seminole hard rock hotel and casino hollywood, florida. now playing live craps, roulette, and sports betting. ♪i'm hearing different ways for me to screen for colon cancer.♪ ♪it's time to use my voice,♪
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lap hap coccal lan han come tes ♪ >> jimmy: hey, we're back. with young zac efron, who's got a movie called "the iron claw" opening on december 22nd in the movie theaters. on monday, you got a star on the hollywood walk of fame outside. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: what does that mean to you? like, what that is -- that is a meaningful thing to you? >> oh, i mean, there's -- it's -- it's tough to describe, man. i wasn't prepared for the actual ceremony. it was such a special day. >> jimmy: who spoke at the ceremony? >> oh, geez. miles teller. [ cheers ]
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which was awesome. and he, like, shut it down. it was so nice to hear him talk. he's such a funny dude, man. shout-out to miles. thank you for that. jeremy spoke. >> jimmy: jeremy alan white, your costar? >> yes, jeremy alan white, and sean derken, the director of "iron claw." >> jimmy: was your family there? >> the whole family was there, it was pretty great. >> jimmy: what did your mother think? >> stoked. she's the one who drove in l.a. i would be in the back of her minivan study fog the s.a.t.s. she'd drive three hours to get me down for auditions. >> jimmy: wow. >> so the amount of work they put in and -- >> jimmy: had you as a kid come down here and looked at those stars and fantasized that maybe one day you'd be pulling wigs off old ladies in the theater? [ laughter ] >> i mean, i looked at the stars. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i can't say i fantasized. it just seemed too far from
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something that was a possibility, you know. >> jimmy: yeah. >> to actually get one. but yeah, man, i -- i spent a lot of time on those stars. i used to skateboard over them because it's really smooth on that sidewalk. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah, i, like, broke my wrist somewhere out there on my skateboard. like, right next to -- betty white? [ laughter ] i don't remember. i was like, smash! right next to one of those stores with all the fake academy awards in there. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, yeah, there's a lot of them, yeah. >> yeah. >> yeah. there was like spider-man right there. >> jimmy: what are you going to do for the holidays? do you have family plans? what's the plan? >> yeah probably the usual. i love to go -- it's really the one time of year that i know i'm not going to be busy and there's no, you know -- there's no, like, work going on or press. i just like to go chill with the family, man. >> jimmy: yeah, i love -- maybe we can work out together over the break. [ laughter ] >> hey. >> jimmy: i'll show you some stuff, you show me some of your stuff or whatever, you know. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: really get jacked, you
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know what i'm saying. >> sure, i plan on just eating a ton of cookies. >> jimmy: yeah, a ton of cookies, yeah. you don't have to worry about that now, right? >> no, i don't give a [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you have your shopping done? >> uh -- still a little bit. i've got some good ideas. >> jimmy: you have some good ideas, all right. you have to get a gift for everyone, i would assume in your family? >> yeah, i like to do that. >> jimmy: do they give you good stuff? >> you know, my parents crushed it growing up. >> jimmy: they do? growing up, yeah. [ laughter ] >> yeah, growing up. now they get me more sentimental tough. i like pictures of all of us together and things like that. >> jimmy: oh, that's nice, yeah, yeah. >> yeah, but it's still fun to -- i have a, you know, little brother and sister now. they're 4 and 2. >> jimmy: oh, wow. >> and it's really fun to get them stuff. >> jimmy: yeah. that's -- yeah, that's primo age right there. >> yes. santa is coming extra hard.
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[ laughter ] >> jimmy: wait till they see "high school musical," they're going to lose their minds. [ laughter ] i know where we can get you a deal on a plastic purse. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it's great to see you. congratulations on the movie. it's called "the iron claw." it opens in theaters december 22nd. zac efron, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] we'll be back with jason mantzoukas. ♪ guitar chords playing ♪ hey what do you think of the new album cover? uhmm, i like it. no i think that could work. oh, i like... that. hmm, may i? please. oo, or we could try something like that. ahh it's good, right? it's somethin'. i think it needs to be this. you know what i me- yeah i like that. feels iconic.
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>> that's right. to kick things off, fun facts about this national holiday. then coming up with names for all our staff petersons [ cheers and applause ] whether they like it or not. >> we ended up eating an entire bowl of [ bleep ] thinking they were [ bleep ]. >> it's a good read, it's out now. >> we can be two consenting adults, we can [ bleep ] here. want to do it now? get your [ bleep ] up then. >> you get your [ bleep ] up. >> hold on, stop it. >> you want to [ bleep ] me? >> i've [ bleep ]ed a lot of guys and i'm friends with all those guys too. >> we are back in business if your business is [ bleep ]ing and [ bleep ]ing at 76. >> if i'm not found innocent next tuesday in court, i promise you that you can [ bleep ] me any time, and i promise i'll have cocaine on me. [ donald trump had white house staff call the disney corporation to try and [ bleep ] jimmy kimmel.
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>> i had one of those [ bleep ]s and i wanted to ride it, i was going to ride that [ bleep ]. >> what do you think of [ bleep ]? >> i'd like to be able to [ bleep ] his [ bleep ]. but i think we live too far away from each other. >> yeah, maybe not, because today her dream came true. >> hat in hand, he said, reverend, i don't know much about running a church, i don't know much about preaching, but he said, when i call my cows in to [ bleep ] them and only one comes, i don't give them the whole load. [ cheers and applause ] (♪) [water spraying] this is ludicrous. ludicrous! alright, who called for ludacris? sorry, we meant this is ludicrous. oh you don't tell ludacris what's ludicrous, ludacris tells you what's ludicrous. okay. [faucet further breaks] oh, that is ludicrous. you don't need me for this, hang on. ♪like a good neighbor, state farm is there.♪ good thing you have state farm. just file a claim on the app, or call us. guess i can go. don't you mean roll out? like a good neighbor, state farm is there.
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>> jimmy: welcome back. music from queens of the stone age is on the way. our next guest plays a greek god, a role he was born to inhabit in a new adaptation of the beloved children's book series, "percy jackson and the olympians." watch it starting wednesday on disney plus. please say hello to jason mantzoukas. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you? have you ever shaved your whole body and oiled it up like zac efron did? >> here's the thing. >> jimmy: yeah? >> first of all, i want to get to that. because of course i have. [ laughter ] but don't you want to cut to the person in the audience who's wearing a purse with my face on it? [ cheers ] i'm so sorry, but is there no one here tonight wearing clothing with my face on it?
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[ laughter ] >> jimmy: hey, you know what, that's a problem between you and your merch store. >> this is pfft right here. i've never shared it -- i've never done -- i'm terrified of what's underneath. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: most people don't know, you were born with a beard? >> i was born a full cousin it. a reference half these people didn't get. >> jimmy: they remade it, so they know it. >> captain cave man. >> jimmy: remakes are keeping us fresh. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: you made a movie with zac? >> i did. are we not promoting that right now? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, that was -- >> i was told i'm promoting the 2016 movie "dirty grandpa." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's from the past. >> that's from the past? man, i took a long nap. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: robert de niro was the dirty grandpa. >> i mean, come on. fuggetaboudit. for me, that was the whole deal. they were like, "hey, do you
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want to come do this movie?" they were like, "it's zac efron" who i'd met on "neighbors." then it's robert de niro. holy -- this is happening, this is everything i wanted. i go down there. "we want you to come in, mix it up, improvise, be funny, do your crazy weird guy stuff." i was like, okay, sure, yeah, why not? go to set the first day, and it's this set, and we're getting it all ready, we're blocking it. robert de niro is not there for all the blocking, for all the hanging around, getting used to it. we don't want to waste bob's time. >> jimmy: right. >> be very clear, you do not want to waste bob's time. in my mind, i'm about to do a scene with travis bickle. i'm here to do scenes with de niro. they come, put him there, then i'm not doing lines at all. i'm just going -- the scene is 20 seconds long, 30 seconds. i'm going for two, three minutes just looping around to nonsense.
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and he's just there like -- [ laughter ] just stone-faced. giving me nothing. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> and how much attention had been given to not wasting bob's time? is just playing in my head. i'm like, this guy is going to kill me. [ laughter ] and we're doing take after take of this. you know? oh, yeah, let's do another one. and he's just like -- [ laughter ] stone-faced. that's my de niro. >> jimmy: perfect. >> it's great, right? as long as i don't have to do vocal bits, great. anyway. so we do this for a while. and in my mind i'm like, i'm for sure getting fired. >> jimmy: oh, right. >> there's no way i'm not going to get fired. because this is nothing but a waste of time. truly, this is indulgent. and i have, again, just arrived. they've been shooting for weeks and i've just dropped in, "i'm going to do this now, pfft."
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anyway, we do the whole thing. de niro's giving me what i perceive of as i'm going to murder youize, goodfellas eyes, raging bull. he's going to absolutely destroy me. we finish. "okay, great, we're going to move on to the next thing." we're exiting and he just goes, "there was some funny stuff in there." [ cheers and applause ] i'm like what? >> jimmy: that's pretty good. >> i did it. but he gave me nothing. >> jimmy: from him, that's a high five. >> i swear to god, i genuinely was like, that's it, i don't care if anybody ever appreciates what i do again. i just got up. there was some pretty funny stuff in there from de niro. >> jimmy: how long have you been doing your podcast? >> we've been doing "how did this get made" for 13 years. >> jimmy: 13 years. [ cheers and applause ] back before -- now there's lot of podcasts. >> yeah. oh, no, when we started doing podcasts, there was no podcast. there was so few -- it was an opportunity for us to just, like, do a comedy thing.
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to do a comedy bit, a show. something that was, for us, made us laugh. >> jimmy: you came in with a premise, which now a lot of the podcasts have. >> sure. >> jimmy: the premise is that you find movies, and you try to figure out how in the world they got made. >> exactly. it's kind of like, it all started after a bunch of us had seen -- a group of comedians had seen "wall street 2:money never sleeps." >> jimmy: okay. >> ever heard of it? >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> a truly bad, bananas movie. we saw that, afterwards we were at a party talking about it. the conversation about it was so funny and i said, "that's a podcast." us and our funny friends talking about bad movies. and then somehow we've been doing it for 13 years. >> jimmy: so now at this point, 13 years later, do you find yourself having to seek out and watch bad movies intentionally? >> jimmy? [ laughter ] the podcasts -- what a delight. i'm so lucky.
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but it is systematically ruining my life. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is it? >> yeah. any time i turn on any streaming service, every single algorithm is like, hey! do you want to watch a john claude van damme movie? i'm pretty sure you want to watch a holiday movie about a woman who falls in love with a nutcracker who comes to life! [ laughter ] that's a real movie. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: those algorithms do work. >> that's a real movie. there is -- there are so many movies that are about a -- christmas movies that are about a woman who falls in love with an animated, otherwise inanimate object. a nutcracker. there's one where a woman falls in love with a snowman that comes to life. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, they all do in the movies, sure. >> i mean, like -- i can't help but wonder, and these are, you know, lifetime or hallmark movies. chaste movies. but when are we going to pfft the snowman?
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[ laughter ] that's all i want to see. >> jimmy: that would be a great movie. >> that's all i want to see. you've got to be like, wait a minute, i know when i built you, you did not have a pfft. [ laughter ] do you now? because i'm in love with you. what happened? how's that going to go? is it going to melt? [ laughter ] if things get too hot? what happens? >> jimmy: percy jackson and the olympians is this book series, a children's book series by the way -- >> a children's book series. [ cheers ] a children's book series on disney plus. how many times have i said ffft tonight? >> jimmy: a few times. >> are we being bleeped or are people hearing me say pfft? >> jimmy: you're being bleeped, we'll put a sound effect in there. >> i hope it's a fart. >> jimmy: we'll see, we'll see. for you especially, we'll see if we can get fart sounds. >> that would be very generous
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of you. >> jimmy: just like if everyone says that. >> i want every one of my bleeps to be a fart. actually, bleep it when zac said it earlier, too. >> jimmy: this is like -- in the mid mid-2000 where all the kids were reading this. >> dude, this is massive. i truly had no idea. i knew of the books. these are a series of books that are -- like a young kids on an adventure series of books that takes place inside of greek mythology. >> jimmy: right. >> and so -- but they are so big. and i was like, oh, yeah, this sounds cool, i'd love to do that, thank you so much. then it got announced that i was doing it. i was playing this character, doiynisus, the camp director, and i started hearing from everyone i know who has a 12-year-old, a fren-year-old. my kid is drinking out, they they mr. d., you've got to talk to my kid. i got a video, "here's
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everything you need to know about mr. d." my friend's daughter gave me the best notes on the character. >> jimmy: really? >> maybe that i've ever received from a director. >> jimmy: wow. >> i was like, put this kid in the business. she was like, here's everything you need to know about mr. d. bullet point, bullet point, bullet point. all of it straight-up gold. >> jimmy: excellent. it's great to see you. >> great to see you. >> jimmy: this is going to be a big deal. "percy jackson and the olympians." it premieres december 20th on jason mantzukas, everybody!
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and jason mantzoukas. apologies to matt damon. we'll try to get him on next year. "nightline" is next, but first their album is called "in times new roman" here with the song "emotion sickness," queens of the stone age! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ use once and destroy single servings of pain a dose of emotion sickness i just can't shake ♪ ♪ then my fever broke
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ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh you got no possessions just your flesh on yeah ♪ ♪ see the sights holy braille feel as you might ah rip some pieces free ♪ ♪ oh atrocious f-f-ferocious, yeah check the price alibi ♪ ♪ buy by the slice yeah absolutely ♪ ♪ don't care for me baby don't care for me had to let her go, oh baby don't care for me ♪ ♪ baby don't care for me
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had to let her go, oh ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh oh gonna vacuum all ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ the perfume yeah hit the lights keep your -- outta sight no it's givin ♪ ♪ me the creeps wanna chew gum go on, get some yeah ♪ ♪ put up a fight well let's have it right now baby don't care for me ♪ ♪ baby don't care for me had to let her go oh
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♪ had to let her go oh ooooh baby don't care for me baby don't care for me had to let her go ♪ ♪ hm hm hm hm hm ♪ [ cheers and applause ] this is "nightline." >> tonight, on the brink. the hidden crisis in america. pregnant women facing dangerous emergencies. >> he told me in that very moment thatan
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