previously on "jimmy kimmel live" -- [ correspond horn ] >> what the [ bleep ] are you doing? i caught you red-handed again. >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- sarah silverman. molly baz. and music from dwight yoakam. with cleto and the cletones.

and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome. thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us on -- i don't know if you know it, but it's "golden bachelor" night here on abc. [ cheers and applause ] the season finale of "how grampa got his groove back." [ laughter ] after a long and emotional journey, bachelor gary or gerry or jerry or whatever the hell his name is, finally sharing the name of the woman he will share his reverse mortgage with. he finally found the centrum silver. >> i got to the point, the questions i asked myself about how did i get here, and is she the right girl? and i came to the realization

that -- you're not the right person for me to live with. >> oh. >> you're the person that i can't live without. >> oh my god, oh my god. >> jimmy: hold on a minute. [ laughter ] i met this guy, gerry, seemed like a nice, normal man. but anyone who can do that? anyone who can ryan seacrest a moment like that, like the one where you tell the woman that you love her is a psychopath, okay? [ laughter ] how could you ever trust that person again? he looked right in her eyes and basically told her she was going to die alone. [ laughter ] "oh, no, just kidding." it's sick. it's the mark of a sick individual. but i guess it didn't bother teresa. because -- >> wow! we're engaged! >> we're engaged! >> jimmy: they're engaged. guess what else? they're getting married, just as they got engaged, on tv.

live, january 4th, here on abc. a month from now, they're getting married. i guess at their age, we can't take any chances. [ laughter ] one of our writers, jamie, got a string of texts from her mom during the finale. her mom was babysitting. she wrote, "he just went to bed. sweetest, easiest kid!" which is, by the way, how your parents tell you, you were a pain in the ass. [ laughter ] "now i'll watch golden bachelor on your computer." opening the computer. "leslie has beautiful legs. she just does." "they don't tell us who wins --" "although i know it's theresa --" "wow." "leslie has too much life in her, and she's got too much going on." "i'm having some wine." "he really likes the little tiny one with the pretty legs, teresa." "i think i got them confused." "a little tiny one teresa, that's who he picks?" "the one who dated prince, he's not into as much." "prince was wonderful." [ laughter ] well, she's right. prince was wonderful. jamie's mom was drinking like it

was 1999. [ laughter ] [ applause ] anyway, congratulations to gerry, and the one who didn't date prince. if you want to buy them a gift, they're registered at crematorium & barrel. [ moans and laughter ] [ rim shot ] >> jimmy: thank you. meanwhile, in washington, the other big finale is scheduled for tomorrow night, the political career of congressman george santos. >> it is difficult. i've fallen in love with teresa. >> do you know how humiliating that is? >> things have changed. things have evolved. >> it's embarrassing. it's humbling. >> you're both wonderful. but only one of you is right. >> i know we can disagree -- agree to disagree on that. >> i am so sorry. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, i really thought those two had a chance. the house is expecd to vote tomorrow on whether or not to expel santos. why this has taken so long -- this is like if a mental patient

escaped the hospital and wandered into an air traffic control tower, then a year later he was still up there landing planes. [ laughter ] george santos is making the most of his remaining time in the spotlight. he had a fiery press conference in front of the capitol today. >> give them the option to change their votes this time around. >> guillermo: mr. george santos. >> first time i give you a question. >> guillermo: thank you, guillermo for "jimmy kimmel live." >> good to see you here. >> guillermo: thank you. does anything come between you and your calvins? >> no. no, nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing. these are six years old. >> guillermo: eww, yuck. thank you, george santos. have a good time in jail. >> thank you. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, guillermo. got straight to the meat of it. that's why you're the best. >> guillermo: the best. >> jimmy: this is historic. only five members of the house have been kicked out ever. and only two since the civil war.

but santos said this, "doesn't mean that it's goodbye forever." which is exactly what you expect to hear from someone who is about to say good-bye forever. [ laughter ] the good news is even though his fellow republicans are shoving him out the door, he's still committed to helping them with the big election in 2024. >> we have an entire presidential campaign coming up in 2024. i think i've made clear, i won't rest until i see donald trump back in the white house. >> jimmy: he also won't rest because of the diet pills. [ laughter ] but that's another thing entirely. wow, the coveted george santos endorsement, trump must be ecstatic. i think we found his running mate, wouldn't that be great? it's going to be funny when republicans and democrats vote him out of the house tomorrow. and even funnier six months from now when he gets voted out of the celebrity "big brother" house by snooki and flava flav. [ laughter ] there's a new donald trump movie in the works called "the apprentice." but it has nothing to do with the show "the apprentice." it's the story of a young donald trump building his real estate empire in the '70s and '80s, which is the time period after his father gave him everything but before he went

bankrupt four times. [ laughter ] trump will be played by sebastian stan. if you don't know sebastian stan, here is a picture of him doing the exact opposite of preparing to play trump. [ laughter ] the only rings donald touches are onion. [ laughter ] maria bakalova will play trump's first wife ivana. you may remember maria from "borat 2" where rudy came this close to showing her his giuliani. [ laughter ] how did we forget this, by the way? that should be on a continuous loop on every gas station pump in america. [ laughter ] this is good. according to "the washington post," former speaker of the house, kevin mccarthy, who famously denounced trump after january 6th, then came scurrying back to suckle his teats three weeks later, lashed out at trump. mccarthy called trump to complain trump didn't do enough to help him keep his job as speaker. and has been telling people he got so upset, he said, "f- you." i feel bad for kevin. who would have guessed the guy who turns on everyone he's ever met wouldn't have his back? when it came to crunch time?

now, the new speaker of the house is mike johnson. i realized this today. mike johnson is a dead ringer for the elf on the shelf. [ laughter ] they're like the same guy. tonight's the night, by the way. december 1st, which is about 15 minutes from now, is day one for the elf on a shelf. if you forgot, you need to get out of bed, climb up to the attic, dig through boxes until you find that little felt narc and make him do something cute. [ laughter ] i hate it. it's a pain, always having to find a new hiding spot? it actually gives me a lot of sympathy for melania. [ laughter ] but it is the season of the elf. and with christmas around the corner, guillermo and i, as we do every year, slipped into our tights to help santa figure out which kids have been naughty and which kids have been nice. ♪ >> jimmy: hello, boys, are you how? >> good. >> jimmy: become, become, merry

christmas. what uryour names? >> deacon. >> lucas. >> jimmy: are you brothers? >> yeah. >> jimmy: which one of you is older? >> me. >> jimmy: how do you know? >> i'm 8, he's 6. >> jimmy: how do you really know? >> he's taller. >> jimmy: that makes sense. all right, that's good. are these your notes for santa, your lists? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, let's have a look at those. thank you very much. have you guys been really, really good this year? >> yes. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you promise? >> uh-huh. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i've heard you've done some bad things. you know, we're always watching. right? >> uh-huh. >> jimmy: i've heard that sometimes, ethan, you read past bedtime? >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you don't like when your mom sings? >> that's -- that's lucas. >> jimmy: that's you? why don't you like it when your mom sings? >> i kind of do. but i sometimes don't because it kind of doesn't sound good sometimes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it doesn't sound good? is she not a good singer? >> she is. >> she is. >> but it doesn't sound good to

me sometimes. >> jimmy: weird. yet isn't it interesting that this person who brought you into this world, who sacrificed so much, who loves you more than anyone, when she opens her mouth to bring herself just a little bit of joy in an otherwise very difficult day -- it bothers you? [ laughter ] >> a bit. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: a bit, yeah. yeah. isn't that weird? now this one, lucas, you will sometimes lay on the ground and refuse to move. is that true? >> sometimes. >> jimmy: sometimes. we have a picture of one of those times. tell me what's going on there. [ laughter ] >> i needed to get some sunlight. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were trying to get some sunlight? oh, just trying to get a little tan there? [ laughter ] and your parents, though, thought you were being difficult? but really you're just trying to get a little color? [ laughter ] yeah, did you explain that to them?

>> well, i forgot to. but i'll tell them that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: maybe while you're mom's singing, yeah? okay. ♪ did you hear anything? hear that? >> guillermo: oh, yeah, that's the ice cream truck. >> jimmy: oh. can you guys do us a favor? we're going to run and get some ice cream. but don't tell santa claus, okay? if he calls. because we're supposed to be working right now. >> guillermo: don't say nothing about ice cream. >> jimmy: thank you, we'll be right back. >> guillermo: be right back. ♪ >> ho ho ho! merry christmas! >> hi. >> hi. >> have you been nice or naughty? >> nice. >> nice. >> what happened to my helpers? to my two elves? where did they go? >> they went to go get some firewood. [ laughter ]

for the fire. >> they did not, went to get ice cream, right? >> no. >> yeah, they didn't. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, guys, thanks for waiting, i appreciate it. santa didn't call, did he? [ laughter ] oh! >> ho ho ho. elf, what do you have in your hands? >> jimmy: i went to get the boys an ice cream cone. >> what? >> jimmy: they asked for ice cream. >> no. >> you asked for ice cream? >> jimmy: yeah, santa, they asked for ice cream. >> uh-uh. >> i thought you said they went to go get wood. >> that's what they told us. >> jimmy: no, i said, would you like me to go get ice cream? >> we didn't ask for ice cream, santa, he got the ice cream. >> jimmy: i didn't get ice cream, i don't like ice cream. >> should we punish him?

>> make him clean the reindeer stalls. >> yeah. >> jimmy: no, they poop everywhere, it's disgusting. don't make me clean the reindeer, santa! >> go clean, now. >> jimmy: oh, you think this is funny, huh? >> not that funny. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i hate to give you anything. i got some surgical gloves for you. >> huh? >> jimmy: for you, mitt romney's autobiography. [ laughter ] have a lousy christmas, you two punks! >> ho ho ho! merry christmas! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, thanks, kids. we have a fun show for you tonight. molly baz is here. we've got music from dwight yoakam. and we'll be right back with sarah silverman. so stick around! around here, we like to keep things simple and honest. sure do. that's why at progressive, we show you rates from other companies, even if they're lower than ours, so you can choose what's best for your family.

comparing rates used to be a hard day's work, but not with autoquote explorer. -need me to help again? -no. so join us and taste why progressive is the name people trust. sorry, are we talking about apples now or insurance? [ laughter ] why is that funny? for your most brilliant smile, crest has you covered. ♪ (laughing) nice smile, brad. nice! thanks? crest 3d white. 100% more stain removal. crest. to help protect from hiv. i prep without pills. with apretude, a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. you must be hiv negative to receive apretude and get tested before each injection. if you think you were exposed to hiv or have flu-like symptoms, tell your doctor right away. apretude does not prevent

other sexually transmitted infections. practice safer sex to reduce your risk. don't take apretude if you're allergic to it or taking certain medicines, as they may interact. tell your doctor if you've had liver problems or mental health concerns. if you have a rash or other allergic reactions, stop apretude and get medical help right away. serious side effects include allergic reactions, liver problems, and depression. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions and headache. you must receive apretude as scheduled. ask your doctor about long-acting apretude. and prep without pills. save at apretude.com ♪ don't worry. it happens to the best of us: surgeons, judges... overruled. even bowlers. ♪

i'll be honest. by the end of the day, my floors...yeesh. but who has the time to clean? that's why i love my swiffer wetjet. it's a quick and easy way to get my floors clean. wetjet absorbs and locks grime deep inside. look at that! swiffer wetjet.

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, there. we're back. tonight, this is her best-selling cook back. it's called "more is more: get loose in the kitchen." molly baz is with us. [ cheers and applause ] then later, a grammy-winning singer-songwriter, he'll be at the stagecoach country music festival in april next year, but tonight he's here with us. music from the great dwight yoakam tonight. [ cheers and applause ] next week, we have new shows with ray romano, mahershala ali, bill burr, sebastian maniscalco, lily gladstone, greta lee, halle bailey and adam levine. with music from grupo frontera and joshua ray walker. so please join us for all of that. our first guest is a comedian, actor, podcaster and world-class martial artist who plays the sister of legendary composer leonard bernstein in bradley cooper's new movie called "maestro." it's in select theaters now and

on netflix beginning december 20th. please welcome sarah silverman! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ oh my goodness, look at you, your all dressed up, so fashionable. now that you're a potential oscar nominee, this is your new look? you look very nice. >> i was instructed to be dressed by others for this. >> jimmy: you were dressed by others? >> yes. >> jimmy: this time you listened, you didn't cut the sleeves off the jacket or do anything weird to it? >> no, but i'm wearing what shouldn't be called a beater but is. >> jimmy: yeah, right, right. it's offensive to my people to call it -- >> wife beaters? oh, italian. >> jimmy: no, i meant -- yeah, you know what i meant. [ laughter ] >> he is not. he is not. >> jimmy: how are you? what's going on there? oh, by the way, congratulations. you had a grammy nomination, which is a big deal. [ cheers and applause ]

seemed like in the old days it was for comedy album, now it's really just for the audio of your hbo special, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's kind of like a comedy album. >> "someone you love" it's called. in may, which i was not able to promote because of the strike and everything going on. >> jimmy: right, right. >> now i'm starting over. you have to start over after you do a special. >> jimmy: with the jokes, yeah. you used them all up and you can't do them anymore. >> no, they're gone. >> jimmy: is that why you have that notebook there? >> yeah, so -- >> jimmy: do you have anything you can use? >> i don't know. i have my notebook, but it's rough. you have to start over. you've got to disappoint people, and that makes me brave. [ laughter ] let's see. i mean, i really have nothing. ugh. i don't know if this is something. this is -- this is my impression of a nonbinary person who messes up their own pronouns. >> jimmy: okay. >> i did it! we did it. [ laughter ] yeah?

that's staying. that's it. i mean, it's so sad. this literally just says, "diarrhea and frank." [ laughter ] then in parentheses to myself, "more here?" >> jimmy: yeah, you might want to flesh that out a little bit, yeah. >> maybe more there. >> jimmy: i can imagine what you were thinking. yeah, maybe, is i think the answer. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, right? you bought a new house, i know, you're living in a home. >> a whole house. >> jimmy: like for real. how that is going? i'm trying to imagine you in a -- taking care of a house. >> jimmy: it's a lot, right? >> we have a lot of flies. >> jimmy: oh, great. >> it's very indoor/outdoor. >> jimmy: i see. >> that's fancy. >> jimmy: uh-huh. not the diarrhea? >> it's not the diarrhea that you sent over when rory was prepping for his colonoscopy. >> jimmy: that's right, i feel i should mention -- >> i just remembered that. >> jimmy: i don't want to be presumptuous. just assume people know about our lives.

but we dated for a long time. >> we dated for a couple of years a long time ago. >> jimmy: a lot more than a couple of years. >> whatever. seven. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: now kind of weirdly, rory, your boyfriend, your longtime boyfriend, who looks almost exactly like me, by the way -- [ laughter ] is sitting next to my wife there. >> who looks almost exactly like me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, exactly like you, yeah. and rory and molly both work here. and so, you know, it's very -- there's a lot -- we have a lot of interconnection is what i'm saying. >> yes. >> jimmy: so anyway, rory is living in the house with you? >> yes, he's living in the house. >> jimmy: in the house. [ laughter ] i know it's indoor/outdoor. >> we have a lot of flies. i don't like to kill them. because they're just, you know -- we all love tiny animals until they're too tiny. [ laughter ] i just -- a long time ago, i learned about flies. that their life span is only 24 hours. and there's just something so beautiful about it. and poetic and tragic.

like a whole lifetime in a day. and i was talking to rory about it. and he was like, are you sure they only live 24 hours? and i was like, oh, why don't you google it? because i'm just a girl, what do i know? why don't you [ bleep ] google it? [ laughter ] he was like, sorry! >> jimmy: and? >> oh. well, i mean, whatever. i looked it up for [ bleep ] and giggles. they live about a month. [ laughter ] whatever. [ applause ] >> jimmy: your father, donald, and your stepmother, janice -- >> are they here tonight? sorry. >> jimmy: they are here tonight. they passed away within nine days of each other, which is kind of romantic in the worst possible way. but also very romantic. because they were very -- they loved each other very much. and you guys were all really, really close? >> when janice passed away, they were holding hands. he was still sleeping. >> jimmy: wow. >> and -- i remember him saying, i don't want to live in a world without janice. after she passed.

"i don't want to live without her." i said, "dad, statistically, you won't." i was trying to cheer him up. [ laughter ] you know. i didn't think i'd be right. this is obviously not the time to say i told you so. [ laughter ] he did pass away nine days later. and you came by. >> jimmy: i did, i came by. it was like a comedy central roast. jeff ross was there, you were there, i was there, it was -- >> yeah, jeff came, and the first -- everyone called my dad schleppi. the first thing he said, "schleppi, i've got bad news, i don't think you can be my emergency contact anymore." [ laughter ] then they were very -- jeff has a lot of elderly friends. >> jimmy: jeff, yeah. >> i don't know if it's kink or what. [ laughter ] it's lovely. and he is very close friends with this magician, bernie schein. >> jimmy: of course he is. >> he introduced him to my parents, they became very good

friends. about a year ago they went to see bernie's magic show in north hollywood. cut to may. my dad is dying. and we kind of all camped out in their apartment and doulaed him into death, it was lovely. jeff facetimed bernie so that he could say good-bye to my dad. and he said, "donald, you know, i'm so sorry." and my dad said, "bernie, your show was so bad, it killed janice." [ moans and laughter ] "and i'm not feeling so hot either." he was killing so hard i thought, maybe he won't die? but he did. >> jimmy: yeah. you got to -- great thing, you got to spend a lot of time, really quality time together. because he was conscious at the end and aware? >> yeah, it was amazing. he -- you know, he was -- on the phone with his doctor and his doctor said, he's got to be in the hospital, he's dying. and i said, we promised him no hospital. and he said, well, i don't know,

i'd probably do the same thing, he said, and he's going to die of liver -- kidney failure. and that's like a painless way to die. so i was carrying that in my head when i walked in his bedroom and i was like, "dad, great news." [ laughter ] it was crazy. they didn't make a death plan at all. you know, so it's just been a lot of logistics -- in their defense, they're only 80 and 85. [ laughter ] so it was just so much logistics. janice is gone and dad was about to go. and i'm on the phone with the mortuary. to like, get ahead of it. [ laughter ] he literally -- i literally -- there was a moment where it was like, "dad, i know you want to be buried but do you mind being cremated? because i got this deal on janice's plot." [ moans ] this is so bad for the jews. if you're cremated you can be buried just three feet above her. he goes, "yeah, i don't care, i'll be dead."

"you're so easy, yes, we'll take it." [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: he was the best. he was the best. we're going to take a break. when we come back, we're going to see a scene from sarah silverman's new film "maestro" when we return, we'll be right back. what it's like to perform through pain. if you're like me, one of the millions suffering from pain caused by migraine, nurtec odt may help. it's the only medication that can treat a migraine when it strikes and prevent migraine attacks. treat and prevent, all in one. don't take if allergic to nurtec. allergic reactions can occur, even days after using. most common side effects were nausea, indigestion, and stomach pain. relief is possible. talk to a doctor about nurtec odt.

[stomach growling] it's nothing... sounds like something. ♪when you have nausea, heartburn, indigestion♪ ♪upset stomach, diarrhea♪ pepto bismol coats and soothes for fast relief when you need it most.

thank you. >> come have a bite with us. >> oh, i -- i -- i'm going to see him in the morning. >> you're going to see my brother? >> don't look so surprised.

i'm not, i just -- he didn't mention it. >> well. perhaps he was being discreet. >> my brother? i doubt it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is sarah silverman in "maestro." which is in select theaters now. >> sorry. not used to this. it's a lot of material. >> jimmy: and netflix on december 20th. first of all, you're fantastic in the movie. >> thank you. >> jimmy: it must be exciting for you, because for years people are like, she's a comedian. then you act in these movies and people are like, wow, she's a great actor. bradley cooper, who the hell would have ever guessed he'd be a great director? >> oh my god, he's amazing. >> jimmy: we've known him for a long time. he was a very -- i don't know, he seemed too handsome to be a good director, right? [ laughter ] he is a great director. >> incredible, yeah. i mean, i don't know -- you know, it's -- >> jimmy: you want to focus on you, not bradley? >> i'd rather focus on me.

[ laughter ] but no, i just don't know -- like -- but -- usually in movies, especially if there's big crowd scenes, it's a lot of coverage. so as a comic you're just like, ugh, it's so much sitting around. >> jimmy: yeah. >> not to complain, you get to be in a movie. trust me, you would get -- anyway. [ laughter ] he does all the work. he's worked on this for like six years. every shot, how the cameras will move and everything. we did this huge party scene that should have taken three days. by the time we get on set, everything's choreographed. the background, they don't have to -- like the partygoers that are extras, they don't have to mouth their -- you know how usually they have to go -- >> jimmy: pretending to talk in the background. >> yes. when people pretend to talk, i saw this in a behind the scenes of "the shining." i'm digressing. >> jimmy: go ahead. [ laughter ] >> kubrick is telling the extras, "don't really talk, just pretend to talk, and don't nod." because when you pretend to

talk, you go like this. nobody does that in life. everyone was able to just talk. he had the greatest sound guy and everything. we did it in a day, you know? and in the movie, i used to tell a joke, and that got cut. instead there's this moment where he just came over to me and started improvising, so i improvised with him. then he leaves the conversation by saying, "i'm going to go take a dump." and i was like, "bye." [ laughter ] we watched the movie last night, and it's in there. i was like, oh my gosh. >> jimmy: you play his sister, that might be an exchange you would have with your brother, i guess, right? >> of course. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, did you audition for the movie? or did he just put you right in it? >> no, i auditioned. it was like a -- it was like a nine page -- nine pages of dialogue that was mostly just paragraphs of dialogue. and i had to put it on a tape -- whatever tape is, digital. and --

>> jimmy: you mean audio recording? >> what do they say now instead of tape? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i don't know. >> rory was saying all the lines, you know, off camera. actually, this is a scoop. because bradley doesn't know this. it was so many lines that i -- a sound guy friend of mine gave me an ear wig. i recorded myself saying all the lines. then i would listen to it. then as i'm saying one line, i'm listening to the next line. >> jimmy: that's cheating, i think. >> it's cheating. >> jimmy: it is, right? >> yep. [ laughter ] and i got the role. >> jimmy: bradley had no idea that was happening? >> no, i don't think he would care. however you get the performance, it doesn't matter. >> jimmy: yeah, argue with him, not me, i had nothing to do with this. [ laughter ] >> jimmy! >> jimmy: were you doing this, nodding and going along? yeah. [ laughter ] well, i know -- i think it's probably, as the show's airing, it's probably midnight, which means it's your birthday. happy birthday. [ cheers and applause ] i got you a little something. >> what did you get me? >> jimmy: what are you doing for your birthday? what's the plan?

>> i always do the same thing for my birthday. i have a poker game with the same gang. >> jimmy: pizza and poker, yeah, yeah. well, this is something, that i'll be honest with you, this is not the one i got. i got this for my birthday a couple of weeks ago, and i thought it was -- i knew it was something that you would really like. so i got you one. put on your glasses. >> it's really wrapped, not show business wrapping. >> jimmy: they did ask me, "do you want it tv wrapped or real wrapped?" i said, "please, we must be authentic with every bit of this." now, what that is -- >> oh! >> jimmy: see what that is? it's an automatic ear wax remover. [ laughter ] >> okay, so -- >> jimmy: it will remove all the ear wax, and bits of brain, from your head. [ applause ] >> jimmy knows this is my kink. [ laughter ] and i can't wait, because i'm actually doing this -- like something for lake bell where it's an auction, we offer things to auction to raise money. >> jimmy: yeah.

>> and i'm -- my thing is, i'll clean your ears. >> jimmy: oh, okay. i thought you were going to give away my present. >> no. >> jimmy: okay, good, all right. >> i told you i was going to bring my tools. it was just going to be my scope and my k tips. now i have this. >> jimmy: sarah silverman, everybody. she's in theaters. she does it all. her movie, "maestro" is in select theaters now and on netflix beginning december 20th. select theaters now and on n to severe ulcerative colitish. we'll be back with molly baz!ate takes you off course. put it in check with rinvoq, a once-daily pill. when i wanted to see results fast, rinvoq delivered rapid symptom relief and helped leave bathroom urgency behind. check. when uc tried to slow me down... i got lasting, steroid-free remission with rinvoq. check. and when uc caused damage rinvoq came through by visibly repairing my colon lining. check. rapid symptom relief... lasting steroid-free remission... ...and the chance to visibly repair the colon lining. check, check, and check. rinvoq can lower your ability to fight infections, including tb. serious infections and blood clots, some fatal;

cancers, including lymphoma and skin cancer; death, heart attack, stroke, and tears in the stomach or intestines occurred. people 50 and older with at least 1 heart disease risk factor have higher risks. don't take if allergic to rinvoq as serious reactions can occur. tell your doctor if you are or may become pregnant. put uc in check and keep it there with rinvoq. ask your gastroenterologist about rinvoq and learn how abbvie can help you save. shopify helps you sell at every stage of your business. so you can sell it online, take it in person and go big. like a million orders big. whatever the stage, businesses that grow grow with shopify. i'm steve. i lost 138 pounds in 9 months on golo and taking release. golo saved my life. i was way overweight, and that's what sent me down the path, was i--i wanted to make sure and live for my kid. plain and simple. inez, let me ask you, you're using head and shoulders, right? only when i see flakes. then i switch back to my regular shampoo.

you should use it every wash, otherwise the flakes will come back. tiny troy: he's right, you know. is that tiny troy? the ingredients in head and shoulders keep the microbes that cause flakes at bay. microbes, really? they're always on your scalp... little rascals... but good news, there's no itchiness, dryness or flakes down here! i love tiny troy. and his tiny gorgeous hair. he's the best. - make every wash count! - little help please. vision insurance doesn't do you any good if you don't use it. just like this treadmill i bought, that i keep saying that i'll use... but never do. yeah. with hundreds of frames to choose from, you can put your vision insurance to good use at america's best. book an exam today. i finally found what i've been looking for. mmhmm. (electronic sounds)

oh my gosh. i know. how is this stuff so good? hidden valley ranch. ♪only serious about flavor.♪ whoa! the new iphone 15. with that amazing camera. i wish my family had them. you're an action star... take action! join t-mobile! this holiday at t-mobile, get four new iphone 15 on us, and four lines of unlimited for $25 bucks a line. ♪ new emergen-c crystals pop and fizz when you throw them back. and who doesn't love a good throwback? [sfx: video game sound] new emergen-c crystals. throw it back. he hits his mark —center stage—and is crushed by a baby grand piano. you're replacing me? customize and save with liberty bibberty. he doesn't even have a mustache. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪

>> jimmy: molly baz and dwight yoakam are coming up, but first it's thursday night that means it's time to bleep and blur the big moments of the week whether they need it or not. it's "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> they're really worried. trump's not [ bleep ]ing. so they're asking him to come [ bleep ] him. >> i will be [ bleep ]ing a slew of [ bleep ]s in the coming hours of today and tomorrow. >> it is cyber monday, and you have a few more hours to

[ bleep ] big [ bleep ]s. >> every american should be able to get a job. >> now criminals will open your car and use the garage door opener to get in the garage and may [ bleep ] in your house too. >> i love you, gayle. [ bleep ] on your first night. >> now being investigated for the anti-semitism on their campuses, and i have a large jewish [ bleep ] in my [ bleep ]. >> there's a new college bowl game and the winning team will get to [ bleep ] the mascot. pop tarts bowl. >> i have the pleasure of knowing victor wembanyama, and [ bleep ], it's not the average [ bleep ], it will set you back. >> elmo wants [ bleep ]. >> yeah, elmo does want [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] or ulcerative colitis symptoms are stopping you in your tracks... choose stelara® from the start... and move toward relief after the first dose...

with injections every two months. stelara® may increase your risk of infections, some serious, and cancer. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, sores, new skin growths, have had cancer, or if you need a vaccine. pres, a rare, potentially fatal brain condition, may be possible. some serious allergic reactions and lung inflammation can occur. feel unstoppable. ask your doctor how lasting remission can start with stelara®. janssen can help you explore cost support options. ♪ on your period, sudden gushes happen. say goodbye gush fears! thanks to always ultra thins... with rapiddry technology... that absorbs two times faster. hellooo clean and comfortable. always. fear no gush. some people just know what road to take. those are the people who know to choose allstate. the service road is faster. gps: turn left. not happening. he knows better than any gps. and he'd point you in allstate's direction.

go all the way down the road, past the big gray warehouse. gps: take the next exit. you're not from around here, so you don't know the back roads. i don't want to be late for the party. i'm gonna save us five minutes. some people just know what road to take. gps: you're on the fastest route. those are the people who know safe drivers save 40% with allstate. ♪ don't worry. it happens to the best of us: surgeons, judges... overruled. even bowlers. ♪

with scope squeez mouthwash concentrate, just add water, squeeze to control the strength of your mouthwash, ♪ and find a zone all your own. ♪ scope squeez.

>> jimmy: music from dwight yoakam is on the way. our next guest took her passion for cooking and parlayed it into a whole thing. this is her second best-selling book "more is more: get loose in the kitchen." please say "hello" to molly baz. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: should i open this? >> i brought you a present. >> jimmy: it's not going to jump out? >> no. >> jimmy: is it an ear cleaner? [ laughter ] >> no. >> jimmy: oh my gosh. oh, wow, it's cookies.

really interesting-looking cookies. you baked these, i assume? >> i made them this morning. >> what is in here? >> these are the brown butter pistachio halva chocolate chunk cookies from more is more. >> jimmy: wow. oh my god, it's so good. >> a good cookie is a sign of a good cook. >> jimmy: is that true? >> i think so. a roast chicken, a simple salad, a chocolate chip cookie. >> jimmy: wow. >> you can nail those things, you're probably a good cook. >> jimmy: i feel like i want to eat the whole rest of this. >> for the kids, for the fam. >> jimmy: no kids. [ laughter ] kids do not get any of this. is there a recipe for this in the book? >> yes, it's in the book. >> jimmy: oh, boy. oh, boy, oh, boy. yeah. is that your favorite cooking? >> actually, i don't eat those cookies. [ laughter ] i hate chocolate. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah. >> jimmy: hold on a second. you hate -- actually hate chocolate? >> yeah. like have a strong distaste for it. >> jimmy: what did chocolate do to you? >> nothing, i don't know. i don't recall a specific

traumatic experience growing up. but it's just, like, the worst, most bitter, painful thing for me to eat. >> jimmy: wow. >> so that's actually the only recipe i have ever developed that uses chocolate. >> jimmy: that includes chocolate. >> i was like, i've got a make a chocolate chip. >> jimmy: that's very confusing, i have to say. [ laughter ] it really is. >> i try not to talk about it a lot. >> jimmy: i wouldn't talk about it ever again. in fact, we're going to edit it out from this broadcast so you're never questioned again. i used to watch you when you were on the "bon appetit" test kitchen. >> i heard. >> jimmy: you'd make the videos, brad leone and you were make the stuff, it was loose. >> different from the test kitchen, yeah. >> jimmy: the idea of getting loose in the kitchen means you don't have to wash your hands? [ laughter ] >> it's about kind of letting go in the kitchen. and embracing cooking as this imperfect process that is really stressful if you try to follow the rules really tightly. my first book was all about

laying down the groundwork and teaching good technique. and this one's like just loose be up. give a pinch of this, a pinch of that, a glug of that, season as you go, cook like a real cook, cook like a pro. >> jimmy: like grandma where you never really get a recipe. a little of that -- >> things are loose here, and they're meant to be followed to your tastes so that you nail it every time. >> jimmy: were your parents good cooks? >> no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: neither one of them? >> and i know they're watching, so this pains me. i love you guys. >> jimmy: do they think they're good cooks? >> no, but i don't think they want me to be on television saying they're bad cooks, either. [ laughter ] but it was -- we ate modestly growing up. >> jimmy: what kinds of things would your parents make? >> it was either -- it was a rotation of meatloaf, swedish meatballs, chicken cutlets. there was always a green vegetable, and normally peas. my mom would serve me a little ramekin of frozen peas for dinner, and i was always baffled. apparently -- she says i asked for them frozen but that's psychotic.

[ laughter ] and so i would eat frozen peas and whatever the main course was and a glass of milk. >> jimmy: i went through the book. you had a glass of milk every night. milk is my chocolate, i find it disgusting, i will not drink milk. >> so do i. >> jimmy: oh. >> it was hard to get it down. and actually, the way that my dad convinced me to drink milk was by -- he used to drink rolling rock. i don't know if it's around anymore. >> jimmy: sure it is, yeah. >> back in the day he had a rolling rock every night. so he would splash my milk with rolling rock in order to get me to drink the milk. >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] >> because i loved the taste of it. i was like, this is yummy, beer. this is disgusting, milk. if my milk tastes like beer, i'll drink it. 8 years old. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not only is this -- not only is this vile, it's illegal. [ laughter ] your father should be in jail. >> that's true. >> jimmy: wow. that's a crazy, terrible,

terrible combination, isn't it? >> yeah. >> jimmy: have you tried it as an adult? >> no, i'm too scared. it sounds spoiled. >> jimmy: what was your first professional job cooking? >> so i worked in restaurants for, like, seven years before i went into the bon appetit food media days. so i bounced around from a bunch of different restaurants. i did everything from british gastropub cooking to middle eastern cooking. i spent some time in fine dining restaurants. >> jimmy: what was that like, working in the fine dining? is it like we see in the movies and television? >> it is. it's like on "chef." and i -- it was miserable. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and i did it only because i was like, this is how i'm going to learn. i didn't want to pay to go to culinary school. i was like, i'm going to power through. >> jimmy: people yell at you? >> yell at me, treat me like [ bleep ], and i will learn everything i possibly can and gtfo. >> jimmy: did you work on the line? >> yeah, i started on the pasta

station. i cooked all the pastas. it was like a tasting menu restaurant. and then i made my way up to the fish station, which is like, you know, in the hierarchy of stuff, above, because fish is quite difficult. >> jimmy: right, yeah. you just cooked fish all day? >> all day. there would be four dishes on my menu. salmon, trout, scallops, and a sea bass. it was just that on repeat all day. >> jimmy: scallops in here, i noticed, as your last meal idea. >> yeah. >> jimmy: if you were to ask for a last meal -- the scallop looks beautiful in there. what else is in your last meal? >> so my last meal, it starts with -- so the appetizer course is always a seafood tower. >> jimmy: okay. >> which i think everyone can respect. >> jimmy: uh-huh, sure. >> a caesar salad, my favorite salad in the world, one of the greats. bread and butter. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> and flaky salt. those would be the appetizers. then i would do rotisserie chickens. these particular scallops that are drenched in this garlic parsley butter. >> jimmy: yeah, that's a good-looking scallop right there, that's beautiful, yeah. >> and then potatoes two ways, bowls of aioli, lemons, lots of dill, and we're done. >> jimmy: this is a huge, huge last meal.

when you die, it's going to be a mess. [ laughter ] >> yeah, i'm going to be -- what's your last meal? do you have one? >> jimmy: my last meal? oh, boy. >> you have to choose one. it can be pretty big. >> jimmy: i think my friend chris bianco makes a beautiful pizza, i'd love to have one of those. >> which pizza? >> jimmy: the rosa, maybe. my buddy adam perry lang makes a brisket or a short rib. and a bowl of linguini and clams. there will be no salads. you know. no desserts, nothing. just get right into it and die. [ laughter ] >> same. >> jimmy: that's how i would go about it. >> same. >> jimmy: how did you fall in love with cooking in the first place? >> it was kind of a gradual process. i think -- i lived in italy. i did a study abroad program, as lots of people do. >> jimmy: i hear they have really good food there. [ laughter ] >> yeah, they know how to cook. i lived with a -- like in a family. actually with a widowed old woman, grazielle, because i wanted to be immersed instead of staying in the dorms with the

americans. she taught me how to cook, really. she was alone all day and would -- i would come home and school and she just would have been stewing something all day or making her tomato sauce. she had gone to the market every morning. i was just -- mind blown. because of course, peas and milk is where i come from. [ laughter ] and so just like my -- my eyes were opened to the reverence for ingredients, and like the rituals around shopping for food and cooking, and like taking all this pleasure in a way that i had never seen before. and it just -- kind of something clicked in me. i finished my degree, but the whole time, the rest of my college years, were just spent teaching myself how to cook in order to prepare myself. >> jimmy: did grazielle contribute in any way to this cookbook? >> she's not in this book specifically, although her spirit is in me. >> jimmy: okay. >> but in my first book, her pomodoro sauce recipe she passed down to me, and i published it in "cook this" book, my first book. >> jimmy: congratulations.

"more is more: get loose in the kitchen." it's out now. molly baz, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for being here. we'll be back with dwight yoakam!

>> jimmy: thanks to sarah silverman and molly baz. apologies to matt damon. "nightline" is next, but first you can see him at stagecoach in april. here with the song "santa claus is back in town," dwight yoakam! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ christmas christmas christmas well it's christmas ♪ ♪ time pretty baby and the snow is on the ground ♪ ♪ it's christmas time pretty baby and the snow is ♪ ♪ on the ground said you better be good now baby ♪ ♪ cause santa claus is back in town i got no sleigh with ♪ ♪ reindeer got no toys on my back you're gonna see ♪

♪ me coming in a drop top cadillac it's christmas ♪ ♪ time pretty baby and the snow is on the ground ♪ ♪ said you better be good now baby cause ole saint nick ♪ ♪ is back in town christmas ♪ ♪ christmas christmas ho, ho, ho, honey ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ hang up your pretty stockings ♪ ♪ turn out the lights santa claus is ♪ ♪ comin' down your chimney tonight it's christmas ♪ ♪ time pretty baby and the snow is on the ground ♪ ♪ said you better be good now hey hey ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ christmas christmas christmas ♪ ♪ and have a happy new year too ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

this is "nightline." >> juju: tonight, bethenny frankel, one of the most famous stars of the "real housewives" franchise now taking on reality tv. >> are you biting the hand that fed you? >> that hand didn't feed me. deserves to be bitten. it's time. >> juju: the business magnate and tiktok star leading a