Skip to main content

tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  February 24, 2024 12:35am-1:34am PST

12:35 am
>> jimmy: my thanks to ken jeong, dwyane wade, pete lee, once again [ cheers and applause and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause thank you for watching stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. goodnight, everybody [ cheers and applause ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers. tonight -- dakota johnson star of "abbott elementary," actress sheryl lee ralph an all-new "closer look. featuring the 8g band with dan peters ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers
12:36 am
>> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're all doing well. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden traveled today to new york city so, yeah, those times square elmos made some good money [ light laughter ] in his speech yesterday about the senate's bipartisan immigration bill, president biden said the republicans are unwilling to pass the legislation because they're, quote, "afraid of donald trump." uh, he tried to have his vice president killed i would be, too. [ light laughter ] that's like saying no one's willing to work at camp crystal lake because they're all scared of jason it's a valid concern [ light laughter ] the biden campaign is reportedly worried that the justice department's final report about the mishandled classified documents found at his home in delaware might contain some embarrassing details, like how he lives in delaware [ laughter ] election officials in new york yesterday decided to keep former president trump on the state's republican presidential primary
12:37 am
ballot after all, it's one of the few things left here that still has his name on it [ laughter ] first lady dr. jill biden attended a soul cycle class over the weekend in los angeles, and attendees were reportedly patted down by the secret service said attendees, "where could i possibly be hiding anything? [ laughter ] in a "new york times" op-ed, former trump adviser kellyanne conway said she would suggest he pick a person of color to be his running mate i don't know, he managed to win last time with a running mate who was completely colorless [ laughter ] the only reason you could even see pence in this picture is because he is blushing [ laughter ] former fox news host tucker carlson announced yesterday that he will interview russian president vladimir putin and while they may not speak the same language, they also kind of do [ light laughter ] that's right tucker carlson plans to interview vladimir putin as for why he chose putin, it's pretty simple. hitler's dead. [ laughter ]
12:38 am
[ audience ohs ] and that's how i feel about that [ laughter ] former president trump last night called on conservatives to end their boycott of budweiser brewer anheuser-busch over its association with influencer dylan mulvaney, and said it is, quote, "a great american brand that perhaps deserves a second chance." because if there's one thing trump believes in, it's unlimited chances. [ laughter ] filmmaker martin scorsese is set to premiere his first super bowl commercial ahead of sunday's game, which will push back the kickoff by more than three hours. [ laughter ] espn, fox, and warner brothers discovery yesterday announced a partnership to launch a sports streaming service that would bundle all their offerings into one package. this is like when uber invented the taxi cab [ light laughter ] [ laughter ] kind of how i thought that joke might go
12:39 am
[ laughter ] so in a way, i'm right but in a way bigger way, i'm wrong. [ light laughter ] pizza hut is offering a so-called goodbye pie, which they can have delivered to their soon-to-be ex. i don't know i feel that can go a lot of different ways for the delivery guy. [ light laughter ] "i didn't get any tips, but i got punched twice, and i have a new girlfriend." [ laughter ] and finally, authorities in michigan recently arrested a woman who allegedly stole an amish horse and buggy after she was found hiding in a motel shower under a pile of clothes wow, she really did not like getting dumped by pizza. [ laughter ] that was the monologue, everybody. [ cheering and applause ending on a callback very novel we got a great show for you tonight. you know her from "fifty shades of grey," "the lost daughter," and "cha cha real smooth." she stars in "madame webb," which hits theaters on valentine's day. one of our favorites, dakota johnson will be here! [ cheers and applause
12:40 am
another favorite we've got another favorite for you. she is a broadway legend and emmy-winning actress for her work on "abbott elementary." sheryl lee ralph is also joining us [ cheers and applause what a night, what a show. before we get to all that, house republicans humiliated themselves on tuesday when their attempt to impeach homeland security secretary alejandro mayorkas crashed and burned after a stunning turn of events in which a democratic lawmaker the gop thought would be absent made a surprise appearance to cast the decisive vote for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: tuesday wasn't exactly a banner day for the republican party. the chair of the republican national committee, who was handpicked by donald trump, told trump she would resign after trump's campaign criticized her for scheduling debates with trump's rivals the party imploded over a bipartisan border bill they themselves insisted on and in a nevada primary where donald trump was not on the ballot, the winner was literally nobody >> it was a disappointing night
12:41 am
in nevada for republican presidential candidate nikki haley. the former south carolina governor finished behind "none of these candidates. [ laughter ] that was the choice -- "none of these candidates" in the presidential primary in which trump didn't even bother to participate. >> seth: i don't know what the opposite of momentum is, but i know haley's got it. [ laughter ] even worse, she actually came in third behind "none of these candidates" and "no, seriously, not you, nikki." [ laughter ] losing to "none of these candidates" really has to make you rethink some things. it's like if i was out sick one day and they just aired a shot of my empty desk interviewing larry david, and it got higher ratings. [ light laughter ] also, very rude of larry to show up anyway. "ehh, i like it better this way. [ laughter ] no small talk, no pleasantries i sit down for ten minutes, and i get the hell out of here." [ laughter ] haley worked for trump and even promised to pardon him, and now she's learning the iron law of trumpism if you hitch yourself to trump, you will end up humiliated it's been proven time and time
12:42 am
again. in fact, no group has humiliated themselves more during the trump era than house republicans after they narrowly won control of the chamber in 2022, it took them 15 tries just to elect a speaker, with fistfights breaking out along the way then nine months later, they fired the speaker for the first time in history and cycled through a series of failed candidates to replace him, leaving the chamber paralyzed for weeks, until they settled on a new guy, who based on his name and face might be a.i. [ laughter ] and is, much like his predecessor, failing miserably at the job it says a lot about the gop that i can remember all of that, but i can't remember one bill they've passed that's become law. like, at least rename a post office or something. although i'm sure they'd screw that up too. "all in favor of the rudy giuliani memorial post office what's that? what he's still alive?" [ light laughter ] "i'm just as surprised as you are, fellas! [ light laughter ] the results of my last physical just said 'inconclusive.'" [ laughter ] yesterday, johnson brought to the floor two articles of impeachment against homeland
12:43 am
security secretary alejandro mayorkas for no reason other than politics. republicans can't name any supposed high crimes or misdemeanors, they just want a political win against joe biden. and the way you know this whole enterprise has been doomed from the start is that it's been spearheaded by congresswoman marjorie taylor greene last week she argued at a hearing that impeachment was intended for, among other things, indictable crimes, but she stumbled on the word indictable >> secretary mayorkas' actions and decisions clearly meet the standard necessary for initiating impeachment proceedings. this historical evidence is overwhelming that the founding fathers intended impeachment to be used to deal with the commission of in-dick-table crimes and the abuse of power. >> seth: now, in fairness to greene, it's not like the world "indict" has been in the news at all. [ light laughter ] i blame fox news for this. maybe if you guys talked about trump's four indictments on air more, the gop caucus would know how to pronounce it. i bet marjorie greene also says "in-sure-ection" and "stolen classified dick-uments." [ laughter ]
12:44 am
the worst part to me is not mispronouncing a word, because that happens to all of us. it's mispronouncing a word that is so fundamental to your job. it's like if i came out and said, "it's time for a cluster lake." [ light laughter ] if greene mispronounced the word ornithologist, i wouldn't blame her, but if an ornithologist mispronounced it, i would, you know "what do you do? i'm an orinthologist." "i'm pretty sure it's pronounced ornithologist. "hmm, i think both are fine. [ laughter ] oh, look, a bald iggle!" guys [ laughter ] impeachment is obviously a weighty thing. it's not something you bring to the house floor without knowing for sure that you have the votes to pass it and yet, in a moment that shocked even veteran washington observers, the gop resolution went down in flames. >> breaking news from capitol hill just moments ago, the house failed to impeach secretary alejandro mayorkas by just two votes. it was an embarrassing loss for speaker mike johnson >> on this vote, the yeas are 214 and the nays are 216 the resolution is not adopted. [ cheers and applause >> seth: the cheering at the end was from democrats, although there's definitely a chance
12:45 am
greene got confused and thought it passed. someone had to walk over to her and whisper, "214 is less than 216." [ light laughter ] and then she yelled at them, "how dare you correct me on my math, you're being a real -- >> dick. >> seth: so republicans -- [ laughter ] -- put an impeachment resolution on the floor of the house, somehow got their math mixed up, and lost the vote. now, you might be asking yourself, how is it possible that they thought they had the votes but were wrong well, they knew the number of republicans who would be present for the vote but miscounted the number of democrats who would be in the chamber, thus changing the total number of yea votes necessary for passage. >> we had expected democrat al green to not appear for this vote, which is why thought three republican -- they could afford three republican defections. it appears that al green has showed up and is voting against this, which has changed the math completely they had expected one more democrat not to be here, al green three a -- three "no" votes on the republican side would have been enough to get this through, but because green has come back, this is now tied 215-215, and
12:46 am
that means this vote will fail >> seth: amazing so basically, one surprise democrat screwed the republicans by showing up at the last minute, like stone cold steve austin interrupting a wrestling match although democratic congressman al green's entrance was actually more dramatic than stone cold's, as he was in the hospital recovering from emergency abdominal surgery last friday. and republicans therefore assumed he wouldn't be present for the vote, but he was here's how it went down according to the "new york times. "three house republicans had already cast votes against impeaching mayorkas, and based on attendance at the previous vote, the gop could afford no more then like a scene out of a political thriller, representative al green, democrat of texas, appeared at the last moment to cast a surprise ballot from a wheelchair, wearing blue hospital clothing and tan socks. [ laughter ] he voted no. mr. green's vote was decisive. it tied up the measure, 215-215, and handed a stunning defeat to speaker mike johnson 'i was determined to cast the vote long before i had no idea how close it was going to be,' mr. green said in an interview on tuesday night from his hospital bed, where he
12:47 am
had returned shortly after voting 'i didn't come assuming that my vote was going to make a difference i came because it was personal.' whoa [ laughter ] "i came because it was personal," delivered from a hospital bed - [ cheers and applause -- after making a surprise last-minute appearance to cast a deciding vote is one hell of a line i mean, who's gonna play al green in the movie about this schwarzenegger "hello, my name is congressman al green from texas. [ laughter ] and i came because it is personal [ laughter ] now i must return to my hospital bed. [ light laughter ] but just remember, like i always say, 'i, al green, will be back.' [ laughter ] you know me for my tan socks." [ light laughter ] you know, it's an impression that's so good that sometimes i will admit we force it [ laughter ] so republicans are obviously furious after the vote was defeated marjorie taylor greene accused democrats of hiding -- hiding one of their members
12:48 am
>> they hid one of their members, waiting to the last minute, watching to see our votes, trying to throw us off on the numbers that we had versus the numbers they had so, yeah, that was a strategy at play tonight >> seth: they didn't "hide" anyone he showed up from his hospital bed. you're the ones who just assumed he wouldn't be there you're talking about it like they smuggled him into the chamber inside a giant cake and then he popped out to cast his vote like a stripper "oh, this? oh, this is just a cake to celebrate your successful impeachment victory. there's nothing inside except delicious angel cake and vengeance! [ as schwarzenegger "enjoy your cake, marjorie!" [ laughter ] before the vote, democrats poked fun at the republicans who brought the impeachment resolution in the first place. congressman jamie raskin noted that the only reason republicans were even moving forward with such a ridiculous impeachment resolution was because they didn't have any evidence for their failed attempt to impeach joe biden.
12:49 am
>> we're here because the madcap wild goose chase to impeach joe biden has produced no wild geese. even fox news is lampooning the fact that their own expert witnesses repeatedly say president biden did nothing wrong, and there are no grounds for impeachment. more than a dozen gop members in biden-majority districts don't want to go anywhere near that fantasy production so the trump/putin maga faction headed up by the distinguished gentlelady from georgia has been given this worthless trinket of a consolation prize, the opportunity to bring a slapstick impeachment drive against a cabinet member of unimpeachable integrity who has obviously committed no treason, no bribery, no high crimes, no misdemeanors, nothing indictable, or even in-dick-table, if you prefer [ laughter ] >> seth: well, the joke's on you. "in-dick-table" is an acceptable pronunciation. i read it in the dite-tionary. [ laughter ] republicans knew this impeachment was doomed before it ever began because it had no
12:50 am
chance in the senate now it turns out they couldn't even get it through the house. this is what they're wasting their time on, because the gop isn't a serious governing party. it's a movement devoted entirely to one man, donald trump, whose entire candidacy revolves around being a -- >> dick. >> seth: this has been - [ laughter ] "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ♪ we'll be right back with our friend dakota johnson, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause >> announcer: for more of seth's "closer looks," be sure to subscribe to "late night" on youtube. ugh. nothing works on this acne. hi! who.? i'm a licensed dermatology provider from curology. oh. just get a closer look. yup, acne and some dark spots. but, if you answer a few questions, i'll take a look at your skin and prescribe you a personalized cream. oh! i knew my phone was listening to me. curology.
12:51 am
skincare with a face. start today at curology.com. you love pizza just as much as we love pizza, so we're bringing you our favorite offer yet... for a limited time get a large one-topping pizza for only $8.99 at papa johns. better ingredients, better pizza. need to be at your best? you need an antiperspirant that goes beyond. dove men with 72 hour protection, plus care for your skin. so you can forget your underarms and focus on being unforgettable. dove men. forgettable underarms. unforgettable you. ( ♪♪ ) the union of fruity, sweet gummy and tangy, crunchy nerds. nerds gummy clusters. unleash your senses. your shipping manager left to “find themself.” leaving you lost. you need to hire. i need indeed. indeed you do. indeed instant match instantly delivers quality candidates
12:52 am
matching your job description. visit indeed.com/hire (oven ding audio mnemonic) tyson boneless buffalo bites and hot wings have that tasty kick of flavor... ...so they're perfect for any get-together ...if there are any left when your guests arrive. tyson any'tizers® chicken. more kicks of flavor. more smiling snackers. more to love. tyson. new axe black vanilla? ♪♪ ♪he like when i get dressed♪ ♪i live life with no stress♪ ♪he said that's my best flex♪ ♪♪ new axe black vanilla. get closer with the finest fragrances. ♪ limu emu & doug ♪ ( bell ringing) customize and save with libberty bibberty. liberty bushumal. libtreally blubatoo. mark that one. that was nice! i think you're supposed to stand over there. oh am i? thank you. so, a couple more? we'll just...we'll rip. we'll go quick. libu smeebo. libu bribu. limu bibu...and me. doug: he's an emu!
12:53 am
only pay for what you need. jingle: ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ no one cares about me. so why should i care about myself? i'm scared. i'm hopeless. even when i'm with my friends, i feel alone. i feel like a failure every day. these are the stories of kids struggling with mental health. anxiety affects nearly a third of them. that's why the nfl is working to give kids the tools to be stronger and more resilient. millions of kids feel alone. we can show them they aren't. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: give it up for the fantastic 8g band right over there, everybody back again with us tonight on drums, he is a founding member of the legendary seattle band mudhoney the band is celebrating its 36th anniversary as well as their latest subpop release "plastic eternity." catch mudhoney on tour in the uk and europe this fall and be sure
12:54 am
to fall them on instagram. dan peters is here, everybody. [ cheers and applause >> thank you >> seth: thanks for being with us, dan. our first guest tonight is a talented actress you know from her work and the "fifty shades of grey" films, "the lost daughter," and "cha cha real smooth." she stars in "madame webb," which is in theaters and imax on february 14th. please welcome back to the show our good friend dakota johnson, everyone [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ >> seth: welcome back! it has been too long, dakota >> hello it's been a long time. >> seth: it's been a long time and i think since you last were here, i now dress casual and i feel good about it >> i don't >> seth: until someone walks out dressed the way you're dressed >> yeah. >> seth: and i feel then - [ cheers and applause
12:55 am
and i feel like -- i feel like a full chump >> you want to switch? >> seth: like we met on tinder and you thought we were going somewhere fancy, and i took you to buffalo wild wings. [ laughter ] >> i would wear this to buffalo wild wings >> seth: they would be very happy if you did [ light laughter ] >> do you want to trade outfits? >> seth: i would love. well maybe next time you come you can dress way down and i'll dress to the nines >> okay. >> seth: just to even it out >> fabulous. you got to get your butt cheeks out like me. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause >> seth: yeah, maybe -- i might need you to give me at least six months before you're here, just to do like hardcore butt cheek work >> squats. >> seth: yeah. i'll do like six months of squats just super jacked butt cheeks. that's something for us all. >> i don't know if that's nice >> seth: well, we're going find out. >> do people want that >> seth: i don't know. i think it's one of those things you got to see it and then you decide [ laughter ] >> i have a movie coming out in july and so, i'll come back and start now. >> seth: all right i think i can do it. i know a guy who is very good at that sort of thing >> who >> seth: i can't go into it. but he is sort of the celebrity butt cheek guy
12:56 am
[ laughter ] he is great. >> who is that >> seth: i can't tell you his name, it's top secret. >> is that you >> seth: he is me. [ laughter ] i was happy to see you a couple of weeks ago when you came back and you hosted "snl. >> and i came to see you >> seth: you did you stopped by the old dressing room [ cheers and applause we were talking backstage. you love it. >> i love it so much >> seth: and it had been about a decade since you had done it >> well, let's not go crazy. [ laughter ] that's a big word. a decade in hollywood is like 50 years >> seth: yeah, i know. but i think it speaks to your enduring qualities as a person who is capable of hosting this show that you could do a ten years spot, i think that's an accomplishment >> thank you [ cheers and applause i was giving lorne so much [ bleep ] -- trouble -- sorry -- about it being nine years since i hosted and finally, right before the show, he was like, "i didn't know it was nine years." and i was like, "okay. great. >> seth: because to lorne, nine years is like nothing. he has worked there for almost
12:57 am
five decades now >> yeah. >> seth: he's like, what why are you complaining about nine >> right >> seth: you had a very cool thing which is your mom, melanie griffith, your stepfather, antonio banderas, they both hosted the show, and they came to the show, and they came to the after party. >> yeah. >> seth: now, have they historically been the kind of parents who come to things like parties that you're at as well >> no. why? >> seth: i'm just wondering. [ laughter ] like, i mean, again, when i was at "snl," when my parents would come to the show, they would come to the after party. and it was always weird when you were at party and your parents were there are you used to that or is that rare? >> i mean, i feel that i'm an adult now and we can all do what we want to do. [ light laughter ] i'm not like "mom, look away and then have a sip of alcohol." go in the bathroom and like take shots. >> seth: but when you were young, did they like being around your friends? >> um, antonio did not really care he like hid away and watched
12:58 am
football, soccer and my mom, my house was always the house that had like the parties in it. >> seth: yeah. we were that house too my parents liked -- i think they just liked -- they didn't like having other people's kids around they just liked their kids not leaving. >> yeah. my mom was cool with it. >> seth: yeah. >> my mom, this is so inappropriate, but [ bleep ] [ laughter ] my mom, when i was like 15, i started smoking cigarettes and she came out, i had this balcony on my -- this little balcony on my bedroom. and she came out, "are you smoking? and i was like, "no. and she was like, "well, let me get you an ashtray at least. [ laughter ] because she smokes all the time, still. and i quit ages ago, of course because, gross [ laughter and applause >> seth: i wonder, yeah, does it make you feel less rebellious to smoke cigarettes if your parents smoke cigarettes
12:59 am
>> it makes it cheaper [ laughter ] >> seth: oh, that's interesting. you were ahead of the game >> yeah. >> seth: that's very -- your dad, i was lucky enough to have your dad on the show, don johnson. and he was talking about how when you told him you wanted to be an actor, he cut you off. he said financially, you'd finished high school, and you're like, "i'm going go do this," and he took the hard line. >> yeah. >> seth: and very impressive parenting move to say that and then he said pretty quickly, you were fine. yeah >> yeah. >> seth: was that -- was that a good feeling i would imagine it was >> i think there was a few years of, like, "oh, i can't pay rent this month," and, you know but i figured it out >> seth: you did a really -- we're talking backstage about this as well you did a really funny sketch with the "please don't destroy" boys i think it's okay to call them the "please don't destroy" boys. right? yeah [ applause ]
1:00 am
>> yeah. or if you're like an "snl" insider, which i am, you call them "pdd. >> seth: pdd i can't quite get to the place to calling them pdd. >> you can you're on the same floor >> seth: yeah, okay, so the pdd crew and it seemed like a very -- you were insulting each other. you called them the lonelier island i enjoyed that a great deal. >> sorry [ light laughter ] i'm sorry. >> seth: you don't have to apologize to me. but i would imagine you had a very good time doing that. you are very funny and they must have enjoyed it as well. >> i had a great time. [ light laughter ] >> seth: especially, what was the -- what did you say, the nepo baby? >> nepo truce. >> seth: nepo truce. >> yeah. >> seth: that was a very nice moment >> my favorite bit was the chant after though did you hear that? >> seth: what was that - no, i can't remember it, but i do remember there was -- >> a foot in the door. >> seth: what? >> a foot in the door and so much more. >> seth: that's really good. [ laughter ] that's a really good nepo truth. i have a ton more to ask you will you please stick around >> no. >> seth: please! [ cheers and applause ♪
1:01 am
to help protect from hiv. i prep without pills. with apretude, a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. you must be hiv negative to receive apretude and get tested before each injection. if you think you were exposed to hiv or have flu-like symptoms, tell your doctor right away. apretude does not prevent other sexually transmitted infections. practice safer sex to reduce your risk. don't take apretude if you're allergic to it or taking certain medicines, as they may interact. tell your doctor if you've had liver problems or mental health concerns. if you have a rash or other allergic reactions, stop apretude and get medical help right away. serious side effects include allergic reactions, liver problems, and depression. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions and headache.
1:02 am
you must receive apretude as scheduled. ask your doctor about long-acting apretude. and prep without pills. save at apretude.com need to be at your best? you need an antiperspirant that goes beyond. dove men with 72 hour protection, plus care for your skin. so you can forget your underarms and focus on being unforgettable. dove men. forgettable underarms. unforgettable you. this looks like an actual farm. it looks cute on the app. [farm animal sounds] ♪♪ meanwhile, at a vrbo... when other vacation rentals aren't what they're cracked up to be, try one where you know what you'll get. you love pizza just as much as we love pizza, so we're bringing you our favorite offer yet... for a limited time get a large one-topping pizza
1:03 am
for only $8.99 at papa johns. better ingredients, better pizza. new axe black vanilla? ♪♪ ♪he like when i get dressed♪ ♪i live life with no stress♪ ♪he said that's my best flex♪ ♪♪ new axe black vanilla. get closer with the finest fragrances. po, you have never faced anything like this. new axe b♪ ♪k vanilla. the chameleon is the power of all my old nemesis. [ chuckling ] neme-si. neme-si? we have to get an army of the best crooks and criminals. oh, you're adorable. ♪ violence makes our tummies tingle ♪ it's disturbing. but it's awesome. we can take down the chameleon together. oh.
1:04 am
another one in the books. but we're just getting started. everything going well? oh yeah. let's take a look at this knee. because it's the work behind the scenes, that truly matters. [ physical therapy staff discusses results ] for your mind. for your body. and for the community. -team! for all that is me, for all that is you. kaiser permanente. [ siren ♪ cassie, cassie, i need you at the triage. >> wait, o'neal, will you let me drive? >> what you talking about? >> i don't know. i just have a weird feeling. >> well, if you had a bad experience on the job, don't let
1:05 am
it mess with your head [ explosions ] >> cassie, come on >> seth: welcome back to "late night," everybody. [ cheers and applause we're here with dakota johnson that was a clip from "madame web. this is in the larger -- this takes place in the larger spider-man universe. >> it's actually not the spider-man universe. >> seth: how would i say it? the spider-verse >> this is -- no it is a completely stand-alone world. >> seth: oh. >> it's madame web's world >> seth: so i shouldn't use the word "spider" at all >> no. well, there are spiders. it's, like, a little bit spidey. >> seth: okay. [ laughter ] >> but it's not in the spider-verse >> seth: stand alone >> stand alone, madame web's world. >> seth: don't need to worry about having any predetermined ideas or information about - >> no. >> seth: great >> you don't have to know anything about anything. [ laughter ] at all to watch this movie. >> seth: should i know like what ambulances are 'cause like --
1:06 am
>> no. >> seth: okay. >> you will learn. >> seth: you can learn, wow. so this is really like educational -- >> you don't got to know nothing. it's great for america [ laughter and applause >> seth: it would be really -- that'd be really the funniest thing to put on a poster like, "you don't got to know nothing. [ laughter ] you don't need to know nothing about nothing. >> listen, hey, you know nothing? come see our movie [ laughter ] >> seth: you play a paramedic and a clairvoyant in this film >> yes >> seth: would you enjoy having -- i mean, again, i feel like when people have clairvoyance in films, they always have that thing happen, where they see terrible -- >> where they go - >> seth: yeah. and then it's always -- they always jump ahead to some awful -- that was really good. >> did you like that the sound effects. >> seth: did you do -- now, you did your own sound effects in the movie. >> i did [ laughter ] >> seth: the foley artists were like, "you know i think we should just let her do it. >> we can't do anything without her. >> seth: we can't beat it. that's the best noise i've ever heard for someone about to have a clairvoyant moment would you like to have the power of clairvoyance? >> no, i'm good. [ light laughter ] >> seth: i think i'm good too. >> i feel like i like being surprised.
1:07 am
>> seth: yep >> and i also -- it would be too much responsibility. >> seth: you strike me as someone i believe you like being surprised, but do you ever look surprised? [ light laughter ] like i would feel if i was at a surprise party for you and we all like jumped out, i feel like your expression might not change at all >> let's try >> seth: okay, great >> get down. okay >> seth: surprise! yeah, that's it. [ laughter ] that's exactly what i expected [ applause ] i just had a surprise party, same thing i do not surprise. >> you do not surprise >> seth: i do not surprise i walked in and a bunch of people yelled surprise, and my wife said it was such a drag she said, "you have to try harder." >> what did you do >> seth: i went "oh, okay. because then i was doing the math of everything well, everything weird that had happened in the previous two hours. i was like, "okay. >> right then. >> seth: yeah, yeah, yeah. >> not, like, later. >> seth: and they were all like, "this is such a drag, as he's like doing the math.
1:08 am
>> like, wait, "john, susan. oh, and oh." >> seth: oh. well, this means the world to me >> whoa! >> seth: you are -- you're a millennial there are three other actors in this film who are gen z. and that kind of is one of the relationships in the film is how a millennial would react to gen z. how did you actually like your gen z cast members, your co-stars >> i loved them. >> seth: yeah. >> and they annoy me [ laughter ] >> seth: they annoy you on a generational level, like how they're experiencing life? >> yes and i love that. >> seth: when did you feel the oldest >> all the time. like every second of the day >> seth: that's awful. >> i know. >> seth: it breaks my heart because -- >> i'm not that much older than them >> seth: but it just -- i think it's happening so fast now these generations are, like, turning over >> "it's happening so fast." [ laughter ] >> seth: "every day they got a
1:09 am
new app. >> "they get older and older every day i get older. it's crazy." >> seth: hey, we were co-stars in something, which i did not realize until today. you were in the final episode of "the office. you were this is -- and it's kind of crazy. 'cause like, this is super - obviously a seminole show, and you were only in the final episode. >> i was in the series finale of "the office. you were in that >> seth: i was in it because there was a clip where we -- this was in the final episode of "the office" that there was a clip of "weekend update" making fun of ed helms' character >> god, that was honestly the worst time of my life. [ laughter ] i loved that show so much. >> seth: of course >> and they were like, "do you want to be in the series finale?" and i was like "of course. thinking that i'd show up for, like, half a day and i was there for two weeks. and i'm barely in the [ bleep ] show >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ]
1:10 am
i would also imagine, wasn't everybody super sad? >> they were sad, and they also, like, there were weird dynamics that had been going on for the last ten years >> seth: right >> some people didn't speak to each other and i'm coming in like, "ha ha ha, i'm so excited to be here. [ laughter ] and no one wanted to talk to me. nobody gave a [ bleep ]. and i like -- sorry i'm swearing so much. >> seth: no. [ light laughter ] it's 'cause i had a glass of - >> seth: you know, look, it's the [ bleep ] office's fault it's not your fault. [ laughter ] >> it's their fault. and i was like in the background of all of these scenes >> seth: oh, right that's the whole thing, right? >> faxing things and -- i don't know [ light laughter ] >> seth: can i tell you -- >> thank god >> seth: i recently watched it, and it was some of the most believable faxing i've ever seen [ laughter ] and a lot of people, i think, mail it in when they're in the background of those shows, but i was just like, "oh my god. it was crazy >> i was like well, if i'm here and then i'm here. [ light laughter ] i'm going to deliver >> seth: please come back soon >> no. >> seth: it has been too long. i know i know you won't >> i will. >> seth: but it's fun. i actually have a little bit of clairvoyance, and you're coming back >> okay.
1:11 am
>> seth: you guys, that's dakota johnson [ cheering and applause "madame web" opens in theaters and imax on february 14th. we'll be right back with sheryl lee ralph ♪ it's time. yes, the time has come for a fresh approach to dog food. everyday more dog people are deciding it's time to quit the kibble and feed their dogs fresh food from the farmer's dog. made by vets and delivered right to your door precisely portioned for your dog's needs. it's an idea whose time has come. need to be at your best? you need an antiperspirant that goes beyond. dove men with 72 hour protection, plus care for your skin. so you can forget your underarms and focus on being unforgettable. dove men.
1:12 am
forgettable underarms. unforgettable you. i'm adding downy unstopables to my wash. now i'll be smelling fresh all day long. [sniff] still fresh. ♪♪ get 6x longer-lasting freshness, plus odor protection. try for under $5! ( ♪♪ ) the union of fruity, sweet gummy and tangy, crunchy nerds. nerds gummy clusters. unleash your senses. new axe black vanilla? ♪♪ ♪he like when i get dressed♪ ♪i live life with no stress♪ ♪he said that's my best flex♪ ♪♪ new axe black vanilla. get closer with the finest fragrances.
1:13 am
(luke) this will be a gold mine of local intel. just you wait. (marci) new axeright. vanilla. so, tell us about this corn festival? (stylist 1) oooh you got your corn pudding... you got your corn chowder... (marci) so... is it safe around here? (stylist 2) sometimes. (luke) if a family of eight were to need a cold plunge, where would they find it? (stylist 1) ...and then they dip it in butter, then bam, it goes right in. (stylist 2) ...really cute vampire bar. (stylist 1) the reverend does like a blessing on the corn. (luke) donut shops. how far from here? (marci) no eyebrows? (luke) think of how light it'll feel in the summer. we've got to run. eleven thousand more neighborhoods to go! (vo) ding dong! homes-dot-com. leftover chicken, scallions, cheese... what am i gonna make with this? "may-ow" mayo? best foods?? you can talk? and then she says... "may-ow" ...and boom—best foods saves the leftovers. she can't spell. "may-ow" it's mine! and now our keynote speaker... "may-ow" pete... is it serious? you lasted longer than most. "may-ow"
1:14 am
the economy is simply not working for millions of hard working families. you lasted longer than most. they're working harder than ever and they still can't make enough to get by to afford food and medicine to even keep a roof over their heads. we need to build more housing that's truly affordable.
1:15 am
we need to address this terrible epidemic of homelessness. we need to invest in good paying jobs, union jobs and investments in our future. this, this is why i'm running for the us senate. i'm adam schiff and i approve this message. head & shoulders is launching something huge. the bare minimum. anti-dandruff shampoo made with only nine ingredients - no sulfates, silicones or dyes and packaged with 45% less plastic - giving you outstanding dandruff protection and leaving hair beautiful and moisturized. major dandruff protection, minimal ingredients. job done. new head & shoulders bare. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: our next guest is a tony-nominated and emmy-winning actress you know from her work
1:16 am
on the hit series "abbott elementary," which airs wednesday nights on abc. let's take a look. >> ooh, this look is a slay, mrs. howard. it's giving grade a baddie >> well, period to that. i could never do this on my own every day, but it's nice to see what i could look like thank you. oh oh gerald, honey, grab your gators, because we are going out tonight 'cause mama looks good, baby [ laughter ] >> seth: please welcome back to the show, sheryl lee ralph, everybody! [ cheers and applause ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪
1:17 am
>> seth: welcome back! [ cheers and applause >> thank you >> seth: mama looks good in the clip mama looks good here >> oh, god, i love you >> seth: it's just wonderful >> thank you very much >> seth: i mean always, always looks fantastic. >> thank you >> seth: i'm so glad to have you back, and i'm so happy to have "abbott elementary" back this is season three, delayed. >> oh! [ cheers and applause >> seth: the delayed gratification. >> absolutely. >> seth: everything was shut down because of the writers' strike >> that's right. >> seth: and then s.a.g. strike. it must be so lovely to be back with this wonderful cast and crew of people >> oh my god you know, it was so interesting. all of that time off, which was necessary. >> seth: yes >> the strikes were worth it >> seth: absolutely. >> the workers yeah [ cheers and applause they were worth it but to get back and just be there with the best cast on tv, oh [ cheers and applause it is just a blessing. and i feel good every day. i don't know about that 5:30 in the morning call, but -- >> seth: they start you early. they start you early >> they start us very early. >> seth: and no respect for the fact that you're here in new york city right now. >> not at all.
1:18 am
>> seth: you're gonna get on a flight after this, you're gonna go back to l.a., got to go to work tomorrow. >> got to go to work tomorrow. but you have to know, seth, i am making a great sacrifice being here with you today. [ light laughter ] oh, i am because, seth, there is a really big star, guest starring on the show this week they only had three hours. just three hours >> seth: ah. >> hit it and quit it. [ laughter ] and i've said to them, "guess what i told seth, 'yes.'" >> seth: i'm already so disappointed that people are going to be watching this big star, and every person is going to be like, "she chose seth? [ laughter ] >> yes, i did. >> seth: i will say, thank you >> you have to see seth in a crowd. we were there at the emmys, right? and when seth is there, seth is like a charming magnet >> seth: oh, thank you >> and all the guy guys, they all want to crowd around seth and just look at seth. >> seth: oh.
1:19 am
[ laughter ] >> and it's like, i want to be like seth. >> seth: oh, my gosh >> seth is a good guy, and seth is a good guy. >> seth: oh, my god. i mean - [ cheers and applause you are -- i've always known you are a fantastic actor. but to see what a great liar you are. [ laughter ] now i -- you know, you said it's the best cast. and i truly believe it and i am sometimes so jealous of the writers that get to write for performers like yourself barbara, your character, mixes up celebrity names this is another gift you bestowed upon the writers. this is something you actually do [ light laughter ] they heard you doing this, and then gave to it the character. is this true >> hmm [ laughter ] okay i will just say this to you. when you hear the name orlando bloom, tell me you don't see big black football player. [ laughter ] >> seth: i do, yeah. >> thank you thank you. >> seth: it does seem like a left tackle. that does seem like a left tackle yeah >> i'm telling you
1:20 am
when i heard -- i knew for years that darren star was a young back influencer. i knew it. when i was introduced to darren star, i was like, "well, where is darren star?" i felt so bad to realize, oh my god, this is not the man i thought it was but i come by it naturally and honestly, and those are my mistakes and why it ended up in the show, mmm, mmm, mmm. [ laughter ] but it was funny >> seth: there you go. it is funny. it's funny every time. the season premiere is about career day >> yes >> seth: you did not -- i would have assumed based on your talents that you knew at a young age acting was your path but you actually thought maybe you were going to be a doctor? >> you know, i'm an immigrant's child. and most immigrants, when their children are born in america, they want you to be great. my mother was so shocked that barack obama was the first black president because she swore it was going to be me [ laughter ]
1:21 am
[ cheers and applause >> seth: there you go. there you go she had high hopes >> oh, my god. >> seth: high hopes. >> she just knew it was going to be me. so when i went to college, rutgers, i was - [ cheers and applause thank you! yes, yes on the banks of the old raritan. [ laughter ] so when i got to rutgers, i was a pre-med student, right >> seth: okay. >> and i thought this was going to be it but do you know, when you're in these certain classes, okay, you have to dissect and cut things up >> seth: yes >> and there placed in front of me is a huge hare, h-a-r-e >> seth: okay. >> which is basically the easter bunny on steroids. [ light laughter ] >> seth: and did you get a easter bunny vibe off of it? >> oh, my god. when i saw -- well, actually, i saw this coat that i really wanted when i was small. [ laughter ] but anyway there it was on the tray and they gave me my first scalpel, in a nice blue velvet
1:22 am
thing. and i took it out, and i was like, "i am not cutting up the easter bunny." that's not happening so i immediately leave that class, and i go straight to the registrar, and i am going to become a lawyer. somehow, i get in the constitutional law class, and this lady, tiny little lady with her hair in a severe bun, and she just went on and on about the law. [ light laughter ] >> seth: it was a law class. >> it was a law -- >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> and i was like, "hell to the no, no, no." [ laughter ] so when i went back after giving the commencement at rutgers, they said, "constitutional law tiny lady, hair in a severe bun? was that ruth bader ginsburg?" [ cheers and applause they did the math, and they were
1:23 am
like, "sheryl, you walked out on rbg. [ laughter ] and i was like, "oh my god, yes, i did. but anyway, that's how it goes >> seth: it all worked out and you did, by the way. [ cheers and applause you were not -- you were not our first black president, but you did make a little bit of history. i was -- talked about this before, but a couple of years back, i presented you with the emmy, me and amy poehler, for best supporting. [ cheers and applause >> yes >> seth: and this was -- you were only the second, is that correct? >> i was only the second woman in 30 -- second black woman in 35 years >> seth: in 35 years >> to be nominated and win [ cheers and applause >> seth: and then something very cool happened, which was, again, two in 35 years. and then two in two years, because this year you're nominated again. and our friend ayo won, and you got celebrate with her >> yes [ cheers and applause >> seth: you knew her, you worked with her. it must have been a very special thing.
1:24 am
>> you know something, my father would say this all the time -- to be the first is wonderful to be the second is great. but once there is the first and second, what does it mean if there is not a third >> seth: there you go. >> so i was very happy to be able to see her take that win. i was like, "go, ayo, go, girl." [ cheers and applause >> seth: we were very lucky to have you in the macy's thanksgiving day parade this year you were our mrs. claus in a role you were born to play >> i was >> seth: yes >> and i am. and when -- i'm telling you, you should have seen kids' faces when they saw me they were like, "oh my god!" they were like, "hi, lady! lady!" oh my god. it was just so heartwarming. and adults were like, "that's sheryl lee ralph." [ laughter ] "that's sheryl lee ralph!" it was just the best day >> seth: wow >> and i didn't freeze too much either >> seth: that's good it wasn't too bad. >> it wasn't too bad did you see what i did, though, to mrs. claus? >> seth: what did you do >> i had to zhuszh her up.
1:25 am
i said, "cock that hat to the side, baby." [ laughter and applause >> seth: yeah. let's get a little style >> yeah. >> seth: let's get a little style. they have fashion in the north pole, too. >> thank you >> seth: what a delight to have you back >> thank you >> seth: it is always such a pleasure can't wait to see the new season [ cheers and applause sheryl lee ralph, everybody. "abbott elementary" airs wednesday nights on abc. we'll be right back with more "late night. [ cheers and applause ♪ you ever feel like the only place you can find cars is in car commercials? oh, this isn't a car commercial. this is an autotrader commercial and this is one of the millions of new and used cars that you can find on autotrader. you can find cars like the ones on your favorite show. oh, no! or the car in this show. get out the water! i bet i can even find the cars in my feed. sure can! you can even find the car in that movie on autotrader. (to ufo) hey, find your own car! need to be at your best?
1:26 am
you need an antiperspirant that goes beyond. dove men with 72 hour protection, plus care for your skin. so you can forget your underarms and focus on being unforgettable. dove men. forgettable underarms. unforgettable you. (vo) welcome to lobsterfest. is your party ready? ready to tango with tails on tails on tails? try lobster lover's dream with two lobster tails and lobster & shrimp linguini. it's one of ten next-level lobster creations. but lobsterfest won't last, so hurry in.
1:27 am
(oven ding audio mnemonic) tyson boneless buffalo bites and hot wings have that tasty kick of flavor... ...so they're perfect for any get-together ...if there are any left when your guests arrive. tyson any'tizers® chicken. more kicks of flavor. more smiling snackers. more to love. tyson. new axe black vanilla? ♪♪ ♪he like when i get dressed♪ ♪i live life with no stress♪ ♪he said that's my best flex♪ ♪♪ new axe black vanilla. get closer with the finest fragrances.
1:28 am
what do i see in peter dixon?
1:29 am
n i see my husband.... the father of our girls. i see a public servant. a man who served under secretary clinton in the state department... where he took on the epidemic of violence against women in the congo. i see a fighter, a tenacious problem-solver... who will go to congress and protect abortion rights and our democracy. because he sees a better future for all of us. i'm peter dixon and i approved this message.
1:30 am
♪ >> announcer: come join the audience at "late night" live in studio 8g. for tickets, head over to latenightsethtickets.com follow us @latenightseth on all social media platforms subscribe to late night seth on youtube. find us online at latenightseth.com. and subscribe to the "late night podcast," featuring "a closer look," guest interviews, and more available wherever you listen to podcasts ♪
1:31 am
[♪♪] how you feel can be affected by the bacteria in your gut. try new align probiotic bloating relief plus food digestion. it contains a probiotic to help relieve occasional bloating, plus vitamin b12 to aid digestion. try align probiotic. when you smell the amazing scent of gain flings... time stops. (♪♪) and you realize you're in love... steve? with a laundry detergent. (♪♪) gain flings. seriously good scent. it's the work behind the scenes, let's take a look at this knee. that truly matters. [ physical therapy staff discusses results ] for your mind. for your body. and for the community. -team!
1:32 am
kaiser permanente. democrats agree. conservative republican steve garvey is the wrong choice for the senate. ...our republican opponent here on this stage has voted for donald trump twice. mr. garvey, you voted for him twice... as your own man, what is your decision? garvey is wrong for california. but garvey's surging in the polls. fox news says garvey would be a boost to republican control of the senate. stop garvey. adam schiff for senate. i'm adam schiff, and i approve this message. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: i wanna thank my guests dakota johnson, sheryl lee ralph, everybody. i wanna thank dan peters and the 8g band. thank you for watching we love you, everybody [ cheers and applause ♪
1:33 am

100 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on