honored locals who died for their country. 32 men of our community lost their lives in world war two. 11 we lost in korea. 17 men we lost in vietnam and two, we most recently lost in iraq. and afghanistan. further south, san ramon city leaders held an event at memorial park. flags were provided to people there to write down the names of loved ones they lost. each veteran was also given a special commemorative coin as a token of the community's appreciation. the annual hillsborough memorial day parade returned to the peninsula. mounted police escorted the parade through the city, ending with a carnaval and a music festival. they also held an observance ceremony honoring those who gave their lives to our country. a lot of people surely came out to, today you know, honor the ones we lost as they served an impactful day for sure. all right. our weather tomorrow morning. we're going to start off with some fog as you step out the door. we'll have plenty of afternoon sunshine and

79. hottest day comes on thursday, 90 go down a little bit for the weekend, but all in all, nice weather next couple days. sounds good. all right. thank you jeff. yeah thanks for joining us. our next newscast is today in [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests -- michael phelps, jon glaser, musical guest, laufey, and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 1970! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: come on. that's -- [ cheers and applause ] that's how you do it. that's a great crowd right there. please, please enjoy yourself. welcome, everybody. welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show." you are here. [ cheers and applause ] you made it. thank you for watching at home. guys, i'm very excited about this. the most decorated olympian of all time, michael phelps, is my guest tonight! [ cheers and applause ] and in michael's honor, under my suit i'm wearing a speedo and have shaved my entire body. so yeah, that's -- [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much. meanwhile, i saw that for the olympics, reese's just unveiled the new medal-shaped peanut butter cup. take a look at this. mm. >> steve: ooh. >> jimmy: yeah. [ light laughter ] medal-shaped reese's peanut

butter cup. that's less "i'm competing for the olympics," more "i'm competing for the ozempics." you know? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] thank you. ♪ some political news, today, former president trump's attorneys finished their cross-examination of stormy daniels, and they accused her of lying and hawking merchandise for personal gain. [ light laughter ] and trump was like, "this also feels like a shot at me too." [ laughter ] today's cross-examination was described as "heated" and "intense." which coincidentally are the only two settings on trump's tanning bed. [ laughter ] heated and intense. "i'm going to go for five minutes intense, please." [ light laughter ] yep, the testimony was heated and intense. trump was like, "if you think that's bad, you should see the texts i'm getting from melania. that's heated. [ laughter and ohs ] that's 'heated and intense.'" >> steve: "i gotta sleep in a a tent." >> jimmy: listen to this, according to experts, if trump goes to jail for violating his gag order, he will likely just be locked up for an hour or two behind the courtroom. [ laughter ]

in other words, trump would be the first former president to be given a time-out. [ laughter ] and if that doesn't work, they're going to take away his ipad and no dessert for a week. [ laughter ] oh, man, have you guys heard about the cybertruck recall? it is not good. check this out. >> we do have a recall alert for you this morning. nearly 4,000 tesla cybertrucks are being recalled. experts say a faulty accelerator pedal could become dislodged. >> tariq: what? [ light laughter ] aw, man, i just bought a a cybertruck. >> jimmy: geez, i'm sorry about that, tariq. >> tariq: it's okay. i can still get around in my hyundai luxury genesis. >> jimmy: oh. >> tariq: "oh," what? >> jimmy: roll the clip. >> attention hyundai drivers, the automaker's recalling more than 31,000 of its luxury genesis vehicles. >> tariq: what? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i -- i mean, i'm sorry. i'm sorry, tariq. >> tariq: man, what am i gonna do for mother's day? i was gonna surprise my wife by picking up her favorite pizza. >> jimmy: oh, yeah?

what kind is that? >> tariq: well it's the 802 vt frozen meat, crispy wood-fired crust, handmade pizza. [ light laughter ] >> we've got a recall alert for you now, the 802 -- [ laughter ] -- vt frozen meat, crispy wood-fired crust, handmade pizza. >> tariq: come on! >> jimmy: well, well, what else does she like? >> tariq: yeah, i'm trying to think. oh, oh, she really likes that aruba aloe hand sanitizer gel. [ light laughter ] the alcohol and arubo -- aruba aloe alco-ha -- alcolo-hada gel. >> aruba aloe balm nv is voluntarily recalling 40 lots of aruba aloe hand sanitizer gel, alcohol and arubo -- aruba aloe alco-ha -- [ laughter ] -- alcolo-hada gel. [ laughter and applause ] >> tariq: i give up! i might as well get her walmart -- [ cough ] -- excuse me -- packages of ground beef. >> walmart -- [ cough ] -- excuse me -- [ laughter ] -- recalling packages of ground beef over possible e. coli contamination. >> tariq: that's it, i'm done. >> jimmy: there you go. tariq trotter, everybody.

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ arubo, arubey. >> steve: he's done. >> jimmy: yeah, he's done. guys, switching gears, i saw that disney and warner bros. are planning to offer a new streaming bundle of disney+, max, and hulu. [ audience oohs ] yeah. although i'm not sure about the name. "nu dix, hu dis"? [ laughter ] ♪ >> steve: hey! ho! ♪ >> jimmy: you remember it. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: well, guys, sunday is mother's day so of course companies have been releasing many sentimental-style commercials. and i saw a few recently that really stuck out here. take a look at this first one i saw. look at this. >> this mother's day, show mom your love, show mom your appreciation, and show mom how dad lost the house. draft kings. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: here's another heartwarming one i saw. look at this. >> at home depot, we care about what mothers need the most, lockable bathroom doorknobs. [ laughter ] because sometimes, you just need five effing minutes by yourself to stare at your phone. home depot. this mother's day, mommy needs some alone time. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey guys, i heard that masked burglars in atlanta broke through a ceiling of a a strip club and stole $250,000. [ audience oohs ] even the strippers were like, "if you're willing to touch that money, you can have it." there you go. [ laughter and applause ] guys -- [ cheers and applause ] finally, it is thursday. it is time for "wepost." here we go. ♪ wepost wepost ♪ >> jimmy: welcome to "wepost." this is where we, as a group, decide something that we should post on socials.

i'm gonna show you five different posts, and we're all gonna vote on whether you like each one or not. you all have voting clickers at your seat? you see 'em? should be next to you or underneath the seats. there you go. you can vote for all of these. you can vote for none of them. whatever you want. we're gonna see the results live. higgins, you --? >> steve: got it. >> jimmy: roots, you have clickers. >> tariq: yep. >> questlove: yeah. >> jimmy: all right, per -- whoever -- i'm gonna post which one gets the most likes from you guys because it's not a a mepost, it's a wepost. you see what i'm saying? [ scattered cheers ] yeah. all right, good. here's the first post. this is, "i wonder if employees at zoom work remotely." [ laughter ] ♪ "you guys gotta come in." okay. yeah, okay. all right, we'll see this one. i think i know the results here. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. [ drum roll ] oh, not bad. all right, not bad. ♪ 89. being very polite. a great, nice, polite audience, yeah. [ laughter ] not necessarily the funniest, but they go, "well, it's not the worst." okay. >> tariq: it's generous. >> jimmy: yeah, it's very generous, yeah. all right, let's check out this next one. it says, "saying 'i'm just juggling a lot right now' is a a cry for help for everyone except jugglers."

[ laughter ] ♪ that's impressive. >> steve: that's true. >> jimmy: it's impressive. you're like -- and then if you take a bite? that's pretty awesome too. all right, let's see the results on this one. i'd probably say a little bit better. what do you think? [ drum roll ] yeah, not bad, okay! ♪ good, we're getting the hang of it. okay. i like this next one. but i don't know. >> steve: right. >> jimmy: what -- how many do we have left? three? three more of these. we have five total. they don't necessarily get better. [ laughter ] >> tariq: just different. >> jimmy: just different, exactly, yeah. but i like this one. ready? here we go. "i bet dave did the bar part, and buster did the arcade part. buster sounds like more of an arcade guy name." [ laughter ] ♪ like buster -- yeah, buster would do the arcade. dave is like, all business, like, "i gotta do the bar. i got -- we'll get sliders. we'll get chicken fingers." and buster is like, "we got skee-ball!" you know, you know -- yeah. all right, let's see the results here, dave & buster's. [ drum roll ] all right, not bad. ♪ all right, good. all right, here we go.

this next one says, "i wonder if nudists imagine people with their clothes on when they're nervous giving a speech." [ laughter ] ♪ "just picture everyone with their clothes on. just close your eyes, and picture everyone wearing a a three-piece suit." all right, i'm feeling good about this one. [ drum roll ] i'm feeling good. i think this is gonna be the winner. let's check out, what did the audience think? [ drum roll ] oh, yeah! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: very nice. this last one here says, "'sparkling or tap?' is a short way of saying, 'are you dating, or are you married?'" [ laughter ] "we're married five years, make it tap. just make it tap. yeah, we're not -- who's impressing who here?" all right. let's see the results on this one. [ drum roll ] can you beat that last one? [ drum roll ] no, it's not this. ♪ we went with -- number four is what we're going with. the winner is right here. [ bell dinging ] "nudists imagine people --" [ cheers and applause ]

i will post this during the break. if you happen to see it online, give that wepost a repost. we have a great show. give it up for the roots right now, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome to the show, everybody. just a reminder, this is a big deal for us, tune in to nbc next tuesday, may 14th at 9:00 p.m. it is "the tonight show 10th anniversary special." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ we've been doing this for 10 years. 10 years we've been doing this show. it's all the past moments, the best moments, from the past 10 years of our show. two hours of our best clips, iconic musical performances, lip sync battles, sketches, interviews with nicole kidman, stuff like that. [ cheers ] it's gonna be a giant party. have a big party. i think you should do it now. you can plan, right? what's today, thursday? so you got friday, saturday, sunday, monday. just tell all your friends, "come on over. i got some chips, i got some dip."

>> steve: guac. >> jimmy: yep. i went to a party once -- i went to a party -- the last really party i kind of really went to, it was years ago, i just -- i think it traumatized me. but i didn't know what to bring over. i wanted to bring something. i called my mom, i go, "what do i bring to a party?" she goes, "bring clam dip." [ laughter and ohs ] okay. i didn't know, clam dip. and i go, "what is -- what is clam dip?" i think it was just a can of clams -- chopped clams, maybe ketchup? [ audience groans ] and maybe triscuits, i want to say. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: that's what i brought to the party. >> steve: mm, clams and triscuits. mm-mm-mm. >> jimmy: yeah, clam dip. anyway, i never got invited back. [ laughter ] but anyway, that's a tip, don't -- or you can have a clam dip party if you want to on tuesday. it's up to you, if you enjoy it. or if you got a good recipe you want to send me for clam dip, i'm ready to try it out and improve on that recipe, which is just chopped clams and ketchup. but yeah, whatever you think is better than that, this tuesday, 9:00 p.m., "the tonight show 10th anniversary special."

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ have a rager. have a rager! tuesday night. [ cheers and applause ] but first, what a show we have for you tonight. he is one of the world's greatest athletes and the most decorated olympian of all time. he also has -- is an advocate for mental health awareness. michael phelps is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] he's one of the best dudes. i love him. i love this guy. you can see him in the new comedy series, "dinner with the parents," which is streaming now on amazon freevee, the very funny jon glaser is joining us. [ cheers and applause ] and we got great music from laufey, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] whoo-la-la. look at that, right there. [ screams and applause ] ♪ oh, wait, wait, what -- what --what is going -- what is going on?! [ cheers and applause ] what is -- we got a standing o. what is happening right now? are you kidding me? [ cheers and applause ]

that's -- maya rudolph! [ cheers and applause ] thank you. maya rudolph. [ cheers and applause ] what did -- what is going on? what is happening right now? >> right now. >> jimmy: what is happening right now? maya, what is happening? >> you tell me. i was in the building, so i wanted to see what you were up to. >> jimmy: i will tell you what's happening. maya rudolph is hosting "saturday night live" this weekend! [ cheers and applause ] with musical guest vampire weekend. you're hosting the show. >> i am. i know. >> jimmy: i love you, and thank you for coming by. >> oh, it's my pleasure. >> jimmy: dude, always walk in. i love this. maya rudolph, this saturday! [ cheers and applause ] check it out. we'll be right back with michael phelps, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

>> jimmy: one, two, three. ♪ >> 1-0, baby. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: already, i don't like this. all right. just -- just -- thank you. [ cheers and applause ]

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is one of the greatest athletes in the world, and he's the most decorated olympian of all time. he's also an advocate for mental health awareness. everyone, please welcome, michael phelps. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: come on. the love, the love you get. >> it's so good to be back. >> jimmy: wherever you go people love you, bud. it's so nice to see you. >> you too. >> jimmy: thanks for coming back on the show. i was lucky enough to hang out with you, pretty recently. we were in vegas for justin timberlake's 8:00 a.m. golf tournament. and -- and we -- we all go -- this is, what, the third year we've gone. >> yeah, third year in a row.

yep. >> jimmy: and it's so fun. we get to hang out. and people love you, by the way. i walk around a casino with michael phelps, people are like, "oh, my god, it's michael phelps." and you -- it's just -- you're just -- >> it's him. everyone's -- everyone's looking at him the whole time. >> jimmy: no. [ light laughter ] >> it's not me. >> jimmy: no. and you're just so nice to everybody. and i got to golf with you and hang out with you. and i just want to show a a picture of you golfing, just so everyone knows. >> let's see it. what do we got here? >> jimmy: you -- you golfed this year shirtless, which i thought was -- why not? [ laughter ] >> right. >> jimmy: i mean, that's the way to do it. the way to do it. >> you got to. i mean, like, look, so, i've been a member of discovery land property, and you can golf without shirts. >> jimmy: what's discovery land? >> so el dorado -- el dorado in cabo. >> jimmy: okay. >> they have places all over the place, but for me, it's nice getting some vitamin d, right? [ cheers and applause ] for me, i just -- >> jimmy: of course you -- i go, i love that -- dude, you're always -- look at phelps. >> we're in vegas though. you know, i mean, look at this. blake and -- it was me, blake, and chandler parsons. >> jimmy: oh, chandler parsons. >> chandler was in there. >> jimmy: he's a -- >> and we just decided just to let loose and have some fun. >> jimmy: and blake griffin. >> yes. >> jimmy: yeah. and no one yelled at you, no one cares in vegas. they go, "go for it", and you're michael phelps.

[ light laughter ] >> i didn't know if we were gonna get in trouble or not. >> jimmy: yeah. >> because -- no, michelle -- michelle wie actually said to me afterwards, she's like, "you didn't read the -- the rules. like, you have to be in golf attire the whole day." so -- >> jimmy: you're in trouble, no. >> i don't know. i don't like getting in trouble. >> jimmy: you get in a little trouble. but they do a great job over there. >> they do. it's incredible. >> jimmy: the people over at the wynn. >> yep. >> jimmy: we were around, this is before you did that or maybe -- it might have been after this. i got a shot of you doing this golf warm-up, and i just don't know what to call it. [ laughter ] is it -- is it, like -- what -- what do you call this move? >> so, it's actually called hip airplane. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: a hip airplane. >> so, it basically really just helps me open up my hips and making sure my body, like, and everything is turning correctly. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so, in golf, right, everything has to move in sync. >> jimmy: i mean, for some people, yeah. [ laughter ] >> ideally. ideally that's what you want. >> jimmy: especially for justin timberlake, it's definitely got to be nsync. >> oh. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: but -- thank you, thank you. can't turn it off. can't turn it off. thank you. thank you very much. appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] no rim shot, nothing?

[ light rim shot ] thank you, rim shot. [ laughter ] >> you want it. >> jimmy: better late than never. yeah, what is the move. what is -- show me what to do. >> okay, so you're on -- do you have a dominant foot? are you right or left foot? >> i have no idea. i guess my right foot. [ light laughter ] how would i know my dominant foot? like if i'm attacked? >> are you a righty or lefty? >> jimmy: what do i kick with? >> are you a righty or lefty? >> jimmy: righty. >> okay, so you stand on one leg. >> jimmy: okay. >> you just go down. oh, that one's tight. yep, that one's really tight. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: so, you do this -- you do this before the golfing? >> and it's here. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, i need -- see, i need to do -- wow, that is impressive. no, i can't do that. >> come on. >> jimmy: no, i need like a a warm-up -- i need, like, a a warmup before your warm-up. >> a warm-up before it? >> jimmy: yeah. >> but that's like -- for me, i have to do that, right. like, i was on the -- on the -- the starting block, and i was always doing my -- my -- my flap. so, that's kind of like my -- my golf flap. >> jimmy: no. everyone always asks you to do the flap every time i'm with you golfing. people are like, "michael, just do it." and you're like, "sure", you're

a man of the people. >> you got to. >> jimmy: you're like, "let's do it." and you do the thing. >> i feel like our -- [ laughter ] i feel like my shoulders are gonna to break out. >> jimmy: no, it's so good. it's just fun, and it's just a a fun weekend, we all just get to hang out and -- and play golf and enjoy -- it's just -- i do enjoy. this year, i was asked by nbc to co-host the closing ceremonies of the olympics with mike tirico. [ cheers and applause ] >> yes. i'm freaking out. so, i need advice on that. but i was just going to ask you, what did it feel like? i know i've probably asked you this question a zillion times. do you miss it? i mean, i know you have all the medals. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you have so many gold medals, oh, my gosh. >> a couple. we got a couple. >> jimmy: but do you -- do you -- do you -- do you look forward to this olympics and you go, "yeah, i remember doing all that stuff? do you get nervous for these athletes? do -- >> i think i'm looking forward to this year because i have less of a desire to get back in. >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know, i think in tokyo, it was kind of like, i'm just kind of removed from the sport, like, it's kind of weird sitting in a chair and not diving in the swimming pool anymore.

>> jimmy: yeah. >> but now we have four kids, and i'm not getting in the pool anymore. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. >> i did say -- i will say, my son, the other day, had a a swimming exhibition, like first -- it was first grade swimming exhibition. he's never had a swimming race before, ever. he literally said to me, he's like, "dad, i'm going to jump off -- off the starting block." and i was like, "awesome, i can't wait to see it." doesn't jump off the starting block. but, as soon as he dove in, i mean, he was half a body length ahead. it was unbelievable. i've never seen anything like it. i've never seen him swim like that. he took two breaths the whole lap. and just -- i don't want to say destroyed everybody but -- [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, you're a dad. you're a dad. you can say that. you're a proud dad. you're a good dad too. [ applause ] but looking forward to this summer olympics in paris, which i'm so excited about this -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: are you nervous at all that someone is going to break any of your records?

>> all of my individuals are gone. my world records are gone. but my medal count is still there. if somebody breaks that, i want to see it happen. look, like i -- i know what -- i know what i put into winning 23 olympic gold medals and 28 total. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i can't even -- i can't even. you're unbelievable. >> but for me, it's like, if somebody does have that dream, and they're not afraid every single day to go after it, then i want the record to be broken, right? like, i think it would be so cool to have somebody accomplish their goal and their dreams just like i did, right. >> jimmy: that's awesome. >> so -- yeah. i hope to one day be able to see it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's good for you. you always do a lot for mental health awareness. it's mental health awareness month, and you've done a lot for this, and opened up, and talked about troubles you've had. does it -- it's very strong of you and very brave of you to do that because the people you see sometimes, whether it be athletes or whatever, musicians, celebrities, actors, sometimes it looks like everything's great.

>> yeah. >> jimmy: and then you go, "well, actually, i'm glad you asked --" >> yeah, 100%. yeah. >> jimmy: -- "i'm going through some stuff." >> and honestly, like what you just said resonates with me so much, because, look, like, when i'm going through my ups and downs, i still go through depression and anxiety, sometimes daily. like i'm going through a little roller coaster right now, myself. but, you know, in those moments, i have a couple friends that will reach out to me, or i'll reach out to them. right, like, if i haven't heard from somebody, i reach out to them, and i just check in, like, "hey, buddy, what's going on." you know, like, jay glazer's a a close friend of mine, and we do the same thing. chuck barkley. like, you know, a couple of those guys -- >> jimmy: you and barkley? >> barkley. but it's just like, we just check in. you're just like, "hey, buddy, how are you doing? like, everything okay?" right. and it's -- for me, in those times when those messages come through, sometimes they're so important, and they hit so hard, and it just -- honestly it helps me take that step back, and just take that deep breath and kind of get out of my own way. so, i mean for me, like, i want everybody out there to have that, right.

like, if you don't have somebody that, you know, you can reach out to when you're feeling down or when you're feeling sad, find that person, right. it's so important to find somebody that you can confide in, that you can share your personal stuff, and just be you. right, like, my two bracelets that i have on my wrist are -- they both say "be you." be your authentic self. if you can do that every single day, you're winning. >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. thank you for doing that. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for doing that. you're a good man. michael phelps, everybody. michael and i are competing in a water war after the break. stick around. oh, no. oh, no. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ oh, whoa! hey, whoa! whoa, whoa! [ cheers ] yeah, i seen that. i see that. i know. [ cheers ] that is not too shabby right there. that's good. [ cheers ] e house was hard. - [speaker] but wounded warrior project helps you realize it's possible to get out there - [speaker] to feel sense of camaraderie again. - [speaker] to find the tools to live life better.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back to the show. michael phelps and i are about to face off in a water war. [ cheers and applause ] we're gonna play the card game, war, but if you lose the hand, you get a pint of water in the face. [ audience oohs ] the first person to throw five glasses wins and gets to water cannon the loser. [ cheers and applause ] lots of ways to get wet, but only one way to win. michael, you ready for this? >> i only know how to win, so let's go. [ drum roll ] >> jimmy: oh! "i only know how to win." all right, here we go. all right. >> we don't shuffle -- are we shuffling? >> jimmy: it's up to you. do you feel like we need to shuffle? >> i'll go by your lead. i'll follow you. >> jimmy: or did our producers make it so that -- >> i know, i don't know. >> jimmy: -- michael phelps is gonna win?

>> let's go. >> jimmy: no, maybe -- >> let's go. >> jimmy: oh, wait, really? >> let's go, let's go. >> jimmy: i -- i trust. >> let's go. >> jimmy: ready? one, two, three. [ clapping ] [ audience ohs ] >> 1 and 0, baby. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, so now you -- already i don't like this. all right. just -- just -- thank you. [ cheers and applause ] that was very gentle of you, thank you very much. and it's very cold. all right, here we go. that's one, all right, ready? one, two, three. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ace! ace! oh, it is so good to see, bud. [ drum roll ] this is just -- just like being back in the olympics. one, two, three. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, you go, bud. [ laughter ] come on, now! now it's a game! >> let's go! >> jimmy: now, it's a game! >> together: one, two, three. go! [ cheers and applause ]

[ laughter and cheers ] >> jimmy: that was aggressive. that was aggressive. all right, here we go. one, two, three. [ cheers ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you see it coming? >> i opened my eyes and saw water coming right at me. >> jimmy: you did? come on, this is so fun with michael phelps. "getting wet with michael phelps," that's the new game. >> tie game. >> jimmy: tie game! [ laughter ] >> you only get wet with me. >> jimmy: all right, sorry. i understand, yeah, here we go. >> together: one, two, three. >> go. >> give me the ace! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i know what you were aiming for. [ laughter ] >> all right. >> jimmy: all right, we got two more -- gotta get three more to go. it's all right, no big deal. you sure you don't want to shuffle now? >> no, i'm good. >> jimmy: sure it's all good? yeah. >> how's the water? it's cold, you shivering?

>> jimmy: yeah, a little cold. it's all right, no big deal. [ light laughter ] >> ready? >> jimmy: one, two, three. >> go. yeah! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right. >> i don't know what to do. i think i want to be gentle but -- >> jimmy: no, you can go for it. just do it. >> okay. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: you're being very nice. you're being very nice. 'cause you're saving it for the water gun. >> yep. >> jimmy: all right, you got one left. this is unbelievable. come on. >> 4-1. >> jimmy: is this rigged? ♪ is it rigged? >> i need another gold medal. >> jimmy: come on! [ cheers ] >> together: one, two, three! >> go. [ cheers and applause ] yeah! >> jimmy: all right, you got that one and then the water gun too. [ laughter and applause ] >> this too? >> jimmy: yeah. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] wait, turn it around. >> jimmy: the winner, michael phelps, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ jon glaser joins us, after the break. stick around.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my next guest is one of my favorites. he's a very funny man, a very talented actor. you can see him in the new comedy series, "dinner with the parents," which is streaming now on amazon freevee. please welcome, jon glaser!

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. oh, my gosh. ♪ jon. jon glaser. welcome back to the show. and thank you so much for -- oh, whoa! hey, whoa! whoa, whoa! [ cheers ] yeah, i seen that. i seen that. i know. [ cheers ] that is not too shabby right there. that's good. [ cheers ] that's good, that's great. that -- that's fantastic. that's really good. ♪ you're like michael phelps. you really are like a spitting image. what -- what is -- what is going on with the -- with the outfit? what is it? >> this is, so, this is --

i'm -- i grew up in the suburbs of detroit. this is detroit city fc. it's the local soccer club. they're a league below mls, and as everyone out here knows, dcfc just had a huge win in the u.s. open cup, beating the reigning champs, mls team houston dynamo. so up yours, houston. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: what is wrong -- what is wrong with -- no one knows this at all. no one here knows about this team at all. >> yeah, they do. [ light laughter ] come on, man. it's detroit city fc going on! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: no, no one -- what is -- i don't know what that means. your t-shirt too says that as well? >> yeah, i got a pretty sweet shirt here. [ light laughter ] got the scarf, the hat. i don't know if you wanna get the socks, if you want to get a a good sock shot. >> jimmy: yeah, i mean, we do always like a good sock shot. >> yeah, there we go. [ scattered cheers ] >> jimmy: unbelievable. >> yeah. >> jimmy: hey, hey, keep that

shot, that was pretty good. can we do a sock shot one more time? see if we can get it a with thumb's up? do you mind doing it? [ scattered cheers ] >> oh, yeah, wrong foot. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wrong foot. [ laughter ] oh, my gosh. jon, it is so good to see you, bud. i'm so happy to -- i want to congratulate you. because you came out with your first comedy album, and it is a a masterpiece. i really -- it is the best. it is called "jon glaser's soothing meditations for the solitary dog." [ laughter ] it's -- >> that is my dog gatsby, and he's watching at home. good boy, gatsby. [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: "soothing meditations for the solitary dog," and it's you with a framed photo -- it's you and gatsby, then a a framed photo of you and gatsby -- [ light laughter ] -- with a framed photo of you and gatsby, and a framed photo of you and gatsby. it keeps going. >> keep going. >> jimmy: i -- it just -- i started meditating there. it get's real -- thumb's up there too? [ light laughter ] and we missed -- now -- now jon -- >> oh, good boy. >> jimmy: now, what inspired this, i know, besides gatsby?

but what -- i feel like i first heard about this, i go, "i need this. i think the world needs this." >> well, the premise of it is that it's supposed to be an album you can put on if you have an anxious dog that has trouble being left home alone. you can put the album on, and it's supposed to be very soothing for your pet. >> jimmy: yes. >> and then it becomes very much un-soothing. it's a comedy album. it's really stupid. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: it's unbelievably funny. it's brilliant. congrats because as far as good comedy albums go, it doesn't get much better than this right here. that's what -- i'll tell you that much right now. [ cheers and applause ] i'm talking grammy buzz. i'm talking grammy buzz. let's talk about "dinner with the parents." you're very funny in this thing, but i heard that one of the reasons why you decided to do this, because you got to work with a dog. >> yeah. it's -- so, on the show, it's about this family. they meet for dinner every friday night with their grown sons. there's also carol kane, the legendary carol kane plays the grandma.

you just watch the show for her, she's so funny. but the rest of the cast -- everyone's great. but more to the point is, so i play the neighbor, and my character -- it's based on a british show called "friday night dinner." and that neighbor also -- my character has a dog. which was for me, auditioning, i'm like, "i hope i get this, so i can have a dog by my side every day that i go to work." and it really was the best. and so it was me and this dog, whose real name is sham, and he's, i think it's a bouvier des jardins, or something like that? really cute, you'll see if you watch the show. but i got to go to work and have a dog by my side. >> jimmy: you went to london to work -- >> we filmed it in london, yeah. >> jimmy: i mean, which is a a dream right there. >> it was incredible. >> jimmy: but then you get a a dog, which you also love. but then you said that you also had a lot of time off, because you're not one of the -- every day you're not working, you have a couple days off a week. >> correct. as the neighbor, you just kind of like, for me, i'm like, i pop in, say my shtick and then go home. and so i ended up with a lot of time off.

i missed my family enough, but i really missed my dog the most. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: we can cut that out. now, jon, you -- >> no, they know. they know. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: don't get mad at them. >> which cam, which camera should i look at so my family knows? they know! [ laughter ] they know. >> jimmy: stop saying that to your family. [ laughter and applause ] you yell -- you're yelling -- [ applause ] how do we -- we already kinda -- did we set up "dinner with the parents"? how do we set up your -- >> i don't know. >> jimmy: yeah. you're just -- >> you tell us. did we? [ light laughter ] guess not. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: they know. >> yeah, they know. >> jimmy: your family knows. which camera do i look at? >> you know why i'm here. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: you know! >> you know why i'm here. 'cause of this! [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that has nothing to do with anything. that has nothing to do with your comedy album, it has nothing to do with anything. "dinner with the parents," very funny, jon glaser. let's take a look. >> you ever notice how all them

ancient hebrews, they all took on multiple wives, right? you got your abraham, your david, even noah. >> that guy had two of everything, right? >> exactly. so here's what i was thinking, just to balance the scales, don't you think that a modern hebrew, such as yourself, maybe you want to let your wife take multiple husbands. >> goodbye, donnie. [ door slams ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: not bad. that's how you do it, right there. jon glaser, everybody. "dinner with the parents" is streaming now on amazon freevee. check out this, it's a very funny record. more "tonight show" after the break. stick around, everybody. come on. you know! you know, don't act like you don't know. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ i wanna see all my friends at once ♪ ♪

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: performing "goddess" from "bewitched: the goddess edition," please welcome, grammy-winner, laufey. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ it always goes like this could've predicted it i'm so naive to think you loved me for me ♪ ♪ kissed as i ran offstage you're too old to play this game ♪ ♪ guess you're still growing up at thirty oh-ooh ♪

♪ were you surprised by me when you took me home when the glamor wore off reduced to skin and bone ♪ ♪ i can't even tell who you want to know i'm a goddess on stage human when we're alone ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ you took a star to bed woke up with me instead you must have felt so damn deceived ♪ ♪ when you made up a version of me that you thought you'd love ♪ ♪ but i am not your aphrodite ohh-oh ♪ ♪ were you surprised by me when you took me home when the glamor wore off reduced to skin and bone ♪

♪ i can't even tell who you want to know i'm a goddess on stage human when we're alone ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ you took me for a fool you stole my youth you wanted this so much ♪ ♪ you watched me rise

then killed my light and now you know that i am not your goddess ♪ ♪ ohh ohh i'm no goddess when i'm alone ♪ ♪ i'm no goddess when i'm alone ♪

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: laufey! "bewitched: the goddess edition" is out now. we'll be right back, everybody. come on back, let's go. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to michael phelps, jon glaser, laufey, and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania.

thank you for watching. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." goodnight, everybody. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- orlando bloom, star of "doctor who," actor ncuti gatwa.