(musica) and my vocal chords will not scare me because i'm gonna be ready and i'm gonna hit those notes. ♪ once more ♪ >> reporter: tonight, an nbc news exclusive. ♪ you opened the door ♪ superstar celine dion speaks out at last about the agonizing battle she's hidden for years. >> the truth was you had a secret deep inside. >> the burden was so heavy. >> reporter: for the first time, she opens up about the rare

disease that threatened her career and silenced her voice. >> what was happening to your voice? >> it's like somebody is strangling you. it's like a spasm. >> so your voice clenches up? >> correct. i have broken ribs at one point. >> wait. a spasm so hard that it can break a rib? >> uh-huh. >> reporter: her very life in danger. >> all that medication could have killed you. >> i did not know, honestly, that it could kill me. >> reporter: now a powerful new film takes us inside her ordeal. >> you were very raw and unvarnished. >> the people, i miss them. i believe in myself, in my bravery. >> reporter: celine dion as you've never seen her. >> i can't wait to go back onstage. i will come back. >> reporter: "celine's story," an nbc news special. good evening, everybody. i'm hoda kotb. her story is as extraordinary as her voice.

for years, celine dion has been waging a secret, ferocious fight against an incredibly rare disorder, one that's consumed her life. well, tonight, she sits down with me for an intimate and emotional conversation to share all she's been through. she was in anguish, and none of us ever knew. >> what song defines where you are right now? >> "courage." ♪ i would be lying if i said i'm fine ♪ ♪ i think of you at least 100 times ♪ >> it's not true. i was not fine. i'm lying. it's not me. ♪ courage don't you dare fail me now ♪ >> reporter: celine dion needs courage now more than ever. for decades her titanic, soaring

voice has thrilled fans around the world. she became an icon with hits like "my heart will go on." ♪ and i know that my heart will go on ♪ >> reporter: and "all by myself." ♪ all by myself anymore ♪ >> it's like i know what i wanna do. ♪ i know you can show me, yeah ♪ >> reporter: but four years ago, the powerhouse performances that brought joy to so many came to a devastating, painful stop. >> and it's very difficult for me to hear that and to show this to you. i don't want people to hear that.

i did not know who i was anymore because i'm not the person that i used to be. i was not celine dion. >> reporter: she was suffering from a debilitating illness. >> i've been diagnosed with a very rare neurological disorder. >> reporter: since the diagnosis, celine has lived largely in silence. until now. >> there's a kleenex box right there. >> oh, thank you so much. thank you. >> can you pass me one? >> oh, so sorry. >> reporter: celine has not performed in public since march 2020. in recent years, she's remained mostly out of sight, hunkered down near las vegas raising her three sons. but she's also been filming a new amazon prime documentary about her health battle, titled simply, "i am: celine dion." >> i'm working hard every day, but i have to admit, it's been a struggle. >> reporter: the film is a harrowing and raw look at the 56-year-old star's struggle to

heal and to try to sing again. >> so, miss celine, i sat and watched your project. and i have to tell you, i was shocked. i was surprised. i had no idea, like, what you'd been through. so what has life been like for you? >> it's been very difficult, very painful, challenging, scary. i spent all my life in the music industry being a performer and loving every moment of it. this passion will never go away. and one day, while i was touring, because that -- i never stopped -- i started to feel different. and it was kind of like my voice was spasming. >> reporter: celine says she began having these voice spasms much earlier than her fans might realize, as far back as 17 years ago. >> who do you go see when you have something going here?

well, you go see an ent, ear, nose and throat doctor. what is this? i'm catching a cold or something. >> reporter: but the little, cold-like symptoms gradually got worse. she recalls one night in particular. >> do you remember the concert? or was there a time where you're like, "that was it"? >> this one -- this one time, i was in "taking chances" world tour. i was in germany. and i was fine, and i had breakfast. and then my voice started to go high, and -- and then i couldn't -- it felt like i could not control it. i was skidding. i was, like, i could not control anything. i had to take the plane to go to the next city. and i arrived at the dressing room, and i started to do my vocal exercise. and then as i went up, one time -- ♪ ah ♪ and i was -- ♪ ah ♪ and then -- ♪ ah ♪ i could not go back up.

if you go up, you better take a good look because you gonna go up just one time tonight. but i have 23 -- 25 songs to sing. >> so what happened? >> what happened? i had to find a path. it was squeezed. so i said, i'm just gonna do two songs. normally i sing, like, almost an hour or 45 minutes for a sound check. >> reporter: a concert film for that 2008 tour captured celine complaining to a doctor about her voice. >> my main problem right now is my neck. i cannot relax my neck, so i cannot relax my vocal chords, so i cannot vocal exercise well. in this area here, starting here and here is where ets sit's sta to hurt a little bit. >> what was happening to your voice? when you were trying to sing and -- >> it's like somebody is strangling you.

it's like somebody is pushing your larynx -- pharynx this way. it was like talking like that and you cannot go high or lower. and it -- it's a spasm. it's like -- of the mechanism of the voice, of the vocal folds. it's like it gets into a spasm. >> so your voice clenches up and you can't -- >> correct. you can't. it's like the hands -- >> you can't get a note out. >> it's like the feet, the spine, whatever. >> so what did you think? because you know your voice. you've taken care of your voice since you were little. you did all the right things. you don't talk a lot on concert days. so what did you think was going on with this -- >> well -- >> -- instrument? >> -- that was the scary part, is that i -- even just by swallowing, i could say that it's like a little cold starting, or just because i pushed too much. it's the third show in a row. >> yeah, you're workin' too hard. >> it's working too hard. yeah, working too hard.

i can't -- i can't wait to work too hard. trust me. but the thing is that it was different. it was more spasmodic than something cold. >> reporter: celine was ensnared in a medical mystery that would soon leave her desperate for answers and in a panic that her career could be over. >> looking at the doctor, please, find something. tell me i got something wrong. because i'm gonna have to make big decisions over here. ♪ ♪ discover the melting sensation of lindt classic recipe milk chocolate. the creamiest milk and finest cocoa. crafted by the lindt master chocolatier. it's beyond words. classic recipe by lindt. introducing kohl's new customer appreciation event! non-members save 15%. it's beyond words. rewards members save 20%. and kohl's card holders save 30% right now! then find father's day gifts like, grilling gear, sephora cologne,

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♪ ♪ >> reporter: celine dion says her voice has always been the conductor of her life. even when she was a little girl, her voice was big. growing up in a small french canadian town in quebec, her

13 brothers and sisters were her first audience. by the time she was 20, winning the famous eurovision competition, the world was her stage. [ singing in a global language ] >> reporter: her songs began topping the charts from "the power of love" -- ♪ cause i'm your lady ♪ >> reporter: -- to "because you loved me." ♪ i'm everything i am because you loved me ♪ >> reporter: she has sold more than 200 million records, and broken the box office with concert tours around the globe. >> when i started my career, i was on top of the ladder. my head was in the cloud. i was looking to the sunset, and the stars, and the rainbows, and looking down. >> reporter: but on that 2008 tour, she began losing control of her legendary

instrument. >> so when i went onstage, i was very, very, very scared. i was scared because just before i went onstage, i asked my sound man, i'm like, i don't know if i can do the show. and i don't know what's happening, and all that. and i -- and then you panic. so more you panic, more you spasm, more you spasm, or you're -- so he said he did not know because it's not just like let's cancel the show. he said, do you want to cancel the show? is -- is -- can we call the doctor? can we -- nope.

everybody lived in fear and the unknown. it was blackout. and i went onstage. >> of course you did. >> of course. >> and? >> and i started to sound more nasal just differently. more reverb, little bit more -- my whole team had to just -- they-- they were trying to find my voice too. >> so that was one of the points where you were, like, this is -- >> it was -- >> -- a problem, right here. >> it was -- and then moments were, like, okay, not too bad. bad. worse. >> reporter: her voice continued to waver over the next few years, as she continued to sing all over the world. >> i was trying to compensate and find another way to have a voice. so we lowered the songs a little bit with the keys. that's fine. that's fine. when you do a lot of shows it's -- for me anyway, it was a smart thing to do. you travel the world, different temperatures, weather -- it's okay to give you're -- a little down, a little bit, it's okay.

i started to kind of, like, find a tunnel, like, to make it tighter a little bit. >> i see, yeah. >> and project more nasal and hope. >> and hope. >> and hope. >> reporter: hope wasn't always enough. she says that sometimes, when her voice still wasn't working properly, she would pretend her microphone was broken. on other nights, she'd rely on the audience to help her sing. >> i was trying to survive, and i let the people sipg ng with m lot. >> you put the mic out like that -- >> yes. >> so they could sing along. >> yes, and i will always do that, because i -- i just love when they do sing. so-- so next time, if you see me doing that, don't think that i'm spasming. i'll say, i'm fine. sing with me. >> but you were doing that because it was giving you a break for a second. >> probably. probably. there were so many parts of the

documentary that hit me in the soul. like, i could feel you so deep, and as i was watching and you were saying that i had to tell the audience it was a sinus infection, it was a throat infection, and then you said something that struck me. you said not telling the truth was too much to carry. >> i had to lie. we did not know what was going on. i did not take the time. i should have stopped, take the time to figure it out. my husband as well was fighting for his own life. >> reporter: five years after her first symptoms appeared, her husband and manager rene angelil began suffering from cancer for the second time. she put much of her life on hold to be with him. >> i had to hide. i had to try to be a hero. i became a nurse. i became a supporter. i had to protect my kids, practice my passion, feeling my body leaving me, holding onto my own dreams. but should -- do i have dreams? what's going on? i can't sing. >> reporter: rene died in 2016. just two days later celine's brother daniel passed away from

cancer, too. >> celine, all the things you were going through, and all the loss, it is too much to bear. it's too much to bear. >> just -- >> period. >> at that time -- >> yes. >> -- my brain, my personality, it's -- it was the show must go on, regardless of your pain, your struggle. >> reporter: celine kept going, even as her symptoms were growing worse. >> and then i started to feel that the body was, like, getting more rigid, more stiff. >> reporter: from city to city, concert to concert, doctor to doctor. >> every time i went to see a doctor, after so many years of living in, like, the unknown, i hoped. looking at the doctor, please, find something. tell me i got something. tell me it's not between my two

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♪ i wanted to be brave. i didn't wanna let nobody down. >> that's it. you didn't wanna let -- >> i didn't want to let nobody down. >> anyone down. >> nobody down. >> reporter: it was 2016. celine found the strength to carry on after losing her husband and brother, while also battling her ongoing health issues. within weeks she was back at caesar's palace in las vegas. a few months later, she was at the billboard music awards performing "the show must go on." ♪ show must go on ♪ >> reporter: that summer she filled in for me on "the today show" with kathy lee gifford. >> hoda, thank you so much for not being here. >> reporter: and took part in our summer concert series on the plaza. ♪ when you want it the most there's no easy way out ♪ >> reporter: but behind the scenes, celine's health was failing.

what started as a tight throat eventually affected her whole body. at times, she felt like she was blacking out. >> i would lose it for two hours without knowing. it started here. no. okay. it's going to be fine. then you have a hard time to walk, and then you -- you blank for two hours and you're like, oh, my god. what happened? >> what happened? >> it's like am i missing some -- >> so it's like a blackout? >> -- sweet? >> some kind of thing. >> do i have like a drop of sugar or something. you -- you think of the simple things. you -- you're not thinking -- >> you don't realize -- >> -- that you're gonna die. but at one point, you -- i mean, you get narrow, and you get into a tunnel, and you -- you can have, like -- it looks like seizures. they're -- they're not seizures, but you don't remember everything. >> reporter: through it all, celine continued to take the stage, doing everything she

could to deliver that golden voice. >> i don't want you to think that i was doing, like, crazy -- well, there were sometimes -- not crazy to -- to kill myself, but crazy things to -- to keep going. let's put it this way. we tried a lot of things. trying a lot of things when you don't know what you have can kill you. no bueno. not nice. but i was trying. we were trying. >> reporter: in order to control her symptoms, she began taking high doses of diazepam, a drug commonly known as valium, to relax her muscles. >> you were taking so much medicine because you wanted so badly to perform for your fans. >> i didn't want to stop. >> you didn't want to stop, but all that medication could have killed you. >> i did not know, honestly, that -- that it could kill me. i would take, like, for example, before a performance, 20 milligrams of valium, and then just walking from my dressing room to backstage -- it was gone already. >> oh, wow. so your body got that used to it? >> correct. that fast, 20 minutes. >> reporter: she says she was taking as much as 90 milligrams a day.

>> 90 milligrams of valium can kill you. you can stop breathing. and at one point, the thing is that my body got used to it at 20, and 30, and 40, until it went up. and i needed that. it was relaxing my whole body. but for what? for two weeks? for a month? okay. the show must go on. here we go. i'm fine. but then it -- you -- you get used to it. >> you get used to it. >> it doesn't work -- >> so you need more. >> -- anymore. >> and you need more. >> more, more, more. >> reporter: she'd just started another tour when covid suddenly shut down everything. >> the pandemic arrived. it was an opportunity for me -- >> to take a break. >> to not be brave and to be smart for the first time. >> reporter: she could finally focus solely on her health. >> i stopped everything with the help of doctors because, when you taper these drugs, you

can -- you can die as well. you cannot just, like, stop everything. >> right. you had to be weaned off it. >> so winding off all the meds, and especially the -- the bad ones, the bad, bad ones. i stopped everything because it stopped working. >> reporter: she was off the drugs, but her symptoms progressed. >> so i got worse. i -- i was wobbling. i had to hold onto chairs, tables -- >> just to get from one end of the room to the other? >> correct. >> reporter: and still the doctors had no real answers. >> no one wants to go and see a doctor and say, i hope they find something. everybody says, i hope i'm fine. but i was going to be fine if they find something. that was the thing. but what are they gonna find? >> reporter: as the world began to re-open, celine was planning to resume her world tour and kick off another las vegas residency, but ultimately realized she could not do it. in april of 2022, she posted a message for her fans on social

media. >> i'm doing my very best to get back to the level that i need to be so that i can give 100% at my shows because that's what you deserve. >> reporter: the one thing that had always saved her, performing for her fans, was gone. but then, in her darkest hour, at last, an answer to what was wrong with her. >> is there something that i can do for myself? >> something you can do. >> or is it the end of my career? welcome to nada yada island ♪ things started off great, but once the new wore off... they changed. in the beginning, i got gifts, like a phone. and the next thing you know, it's like i'm invisible. so i switched up, and uh got me a new phone carrier. don't put up with wireless yada yada, now with metro get that new customer feeling again and again, introducing metro flex, free 5g phones when you join, same deals as new customers

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♪ ♪ >> reporter: after years of struggling with mysterious muscle spasms, pain, and rigidity that affected every part of her life, celine dion finally had an answer. she was suffering from an autoimmune neurological disorder called stiff person syndrome or sps. >> when did you get the

diagnosis, the firm diagnosis, and what did that feel like when you heard it? >> through -- it's very complex. it's very complex. i wanted to, from head to toe, figure it out. and i wanted to also figure out is there something that i can do for myself -- >> something you can do. >> -- or is it the end of my career? >> reporter: sps can cause slurred speech, double vision, painful muscle contractions, and stiffness so severe patients can lose the ability to walk. >> some people barely can see, and it's slow and they suffer a lot. some people it's high and they're like -- some people are in a wheelchair. >> reporter: for celine, the disease has been debilitating at times. >> i always felt like i was going to fall. i don't want to fall. i don't want to break a leg. i don't want to hit my head. >> cause your -- what happened? mus -- what happened?

your muscles got rigid? >> it's -- you have a lot of -- i will call spasms, but it feels like if i point my feet, they will stay in a -- or if i cook, 'cause i love to cook. my fingers, my hands will get in a position. >> like they're cramping? >> my feet, it's -- >> cramping? >> cramping, but it's like in a position of, like, you cannot unlock them. you can sometimes. but it can also be in the abdominal, can be in the spine, can be in the ribs. i have broken ribs at one point because when -- sometimes when it's very severe it can -- >> wait. a spasm -- >> -- break some ribs as well. >> -- so hard this it can break a rib? >> uh-huh. uh-huh. >> this disease, this stiff person syndrome happens to one in a million. it's not figurative. it's literally one person in every million gets this rare,

rare, rare disorder. did you think to yourself, of all the people, like, why me? god, what -- what did i do? why me? >> no. >> you never asked that? >> well, i could have gone that route and say i have been working so hard all my life, and i've done everything that the doctors said, and i've been a good girl. is it gonna take away sps? is it gonna make me feel better? is it gonna fix anything? what is it gonna do for me to question life and say why me instead of living my life? well, i decided to live my life. >> reporter: and she no longer wanted to hide. >> i didn't want to live in this bunker anymore because the burden was so heavy. and i was like, okay, i need to just, like, do what i need to do to, to do the best, but i also need to tell the world what's happening. i had a proof of what's going on with me and i'm not gonna say sinus infection. >> reporter: it was time to tell the world what she had been going through for almost 20 years.

>> i've been diagnosed with a very rare neurological disorder called the stiff person syndrome. this is what's been causing all of the spasms that i've been having. unfortunately, these spasms affect every aspect of my daily life. sometimes causing difficulties when i walk and not allowing me to use my vocal cords to sing the way i'm used to. >> reporter: the announcement made headlines. >> the superstar opening up about the rare disorder. >> after facing health struggles over the years. >> she is suffering from a rare neurological disease. >> reporter: celine sought out the help of a team of specialists, including neurologist amanda piquet, who's

based at the university of colorado and is an expert on sps. >> the episodic muscle spasms are often triggered by various things, including stress. that can be good or bad emotional stress. so it could be doing something you love, such as singing and we can see those muscle spasms come out. >> reporter: ironically, the very thing that brings celine so much joy can trigger severe pain. while there is no cure for sps, celine's doctor says it is treatable. >> you need to look at the whole person in terms of treatment. so immune therapy is just a piece of that that targets the autoimmune condition. and then in terms of symptomatic therapies, you have pharmacologic therapy, so drugs that we use, muscle -- things that help with the muscle spasms, anti-spasmodics, as well as non-pharmacological treatment. physical therapy being one thing.

>> it's a disease that -- that's progressive. and it takes a while to -- to tweak with the medicine. we need to tweak and that worked, that did not work. i gained a lot of weight, losing a lot of weight. we don't want to lose too much, we don't wanna gain too much. what do i need to do? and i was willing to do anything possible. >> reporter: even with immunotherapy, regular exercise, and vocal rehabilitation, coping with sps is still a challenge. >> this condition -- >> yes. >> -- there is no cure. you will live with it your whole life, am i right? >> correct. at this moment in time. >> at this moment in time. [ laughs ] at this moment in time so what does it look like on a day-to-day basis, living with this condition? >> one step at a time. anything can trigger me to have something. too much work, not enough work. if i sit all day long, i will be

wobbly, walking wobbly. if i ask my athletic therapist to push me too much, i can have a condition and -- >> so -- >> -- go into a crisis. >> -- overworking can be harmful? >> correct. happiness, sound, a touch unexpected. so i don't wanna really think so much about this, but i have to be aware of it. >> reporter: a medical crisis can hit at any time and, when it does, it can be terrifying. >> her body was enduring something that was unimaginable and i wasn't sure if she was aware of it and i wasn't sure if she was going to survive it.

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♪ ♪ ready? ♪ oh, yeah ♪ >> is the sound man okay? >> reporter: even before her diagnosis, celine had been working on a documentary about her life. >> my voice is the conductor of my life. >> reporter: cameras kept rolling as her illness progressed. the film premieres on prime video june the 25th. >> the title of your documentary is "i am." let's fill in that sentence. >> i am -- >> i am celine dion. it's intimidating for me to say my name because i hear it a lot.

oh, this is celine dion. oh, this is celine. and, when you're not well, i didn't wanna hear my name. i did not know who i was anymore because i'm not the person that i used to be. >> why do this film at all? >> because what if i just come here today, four years later, and say, well, i'm gonna be coming out with a new album. why did you wait so long? so i'm going to keep this, secretly? i'm working hard every day, and i have to admit, it's been a struggle. i miss it so much. the people, i miss them. >> you were very raw and unvarnished, no makeup. you were just being you, 100%. did you have any hesitation to do it like that? >> if i would have had any hesitation, i would have had makeup on. >> it's not about makeup.

it's not about what i'm gonna be wearing tonight. i've been wearing the same freakin' pajama for five years, and it's one of my favorite. i don't care. >> reporter: she opened the door to her private life, sharing rarely seen home videos of happier times. including her first pregnancy and the birth of her son, rene-charles, in 2001. irene taylor is the film's director. she was able to capture some unguarded moments. >> i think that the raw and intimate nature of the film is really because celine let me in. >> celine. >> 911, what's your emergency? >> reporter: taylor was with celine when she suffered one of her serious medical attacks. >> there is a scene that i think is gonna shock most people who see this film. it shocked me.

it -- it showed, in real time what this disease looks like. it shows how it happens. you're witnessing it. tell me what that was like for you in that position, seeing that go down. >> it just started and it was very quick. she was giggling and five seconds later we were in a totally different stratosphere. >> what was happening it? describe it. >> well, she had a cramp in her foot. and i thought that doesn't look right. >> reporter: within minutes, celine could not speak. the muscles in her whole body completely stiffened. >> i've never told you this, but it was the most extraordinary and extraordinarily uncomfortable moment in my uncomfortable moment in my life, in my life as a filmmaker, but also as a mother, as a -- as a fellow human. because i didn't know what was

happening. we were this close and her body was enduring something that was unimaginable and i wasn't sure if she was aware of it and i wasn't sure if she was -- going to survive it. >> i'm sorry that it was hard. >> oh. not as hard as it was for you. >> reporter: celine's team administered medication and she quickly recovered. it is something she and her family have had to learn to live with. >> for me to be a mom, it's my biggest reward. >> reporter: she taught her sons, including twins eddy and nelson, what to do if she has a sudden attack. >> don't be scared if i can't talk. mom's not dying. mom cannot use her vocal cords. if i not respond to you, it's possible that i hear you, but i cannot communicate. they know what to do -- call 911. >> reporter: the film also captures celine's struggle to sing as she battles her disease. >> my lungs are fine. it's what's in front of my lungs

that's so rigid because of stiff person syndrome that it's like -- ♪ i know you ♪ that's what happens. it's like -- ♪ and now you can show me ♪ and that's what happens, and it's very difficult for me to hear that and to show this to you. i don't want people to hear that. >> reporter: one of her biggest fears remains disappointing her fans. >> i'm an apple tree and people are in line, and i give them apples. the best. and i shine them. i don't want them to wait in line if i don't have apples for them. >> what did this disease take away from you?

>> it didn't take anything away from me. it got me knowledge. it gave me a responsibility. as a mother, first of all, talk to your kids. let them know that you will not die. yes, dad is in heaven, and he's fine. mom is going to be okay. >> reporter: celine continues to take one step at a time, ready to move heaven and earth for her ultimate goal -- a comeback. how close is she? >> i'm not gonna scare my fans. i'm not gonna come home tonight and tell my kids that i had to stop the show. i'm gonna come onstage because i'm ready. needed swiffer. until... i saw how easily it picked up my hair every time i dried it. it only takes a minute. look at that! the heavy duty cloths are extra thick for amazing trap and lock. even for his hair.

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♪ ♪ oh, the one hair. do i still have one hair? >> reporter: for all she's been through, there's one thing celine has definitely not lost. >> ay. what a difference. >> oh, i like it now. >> what a difference that makes. >> yes, girl. you know how she does. >> reporter: her sense of humor. >> oh, my gosh. all right. we ready? >> hi drone.

hey drone. >> hey. >> what's up friend? >> reporter: she's a superstar who's remarkably down to earth. a free-spirit who's grateful to be free again. >> you mentioned that you were in a bunker for four years. are you out of the bunker? >> right now. >> you're out. you're out of the bunker. >> well, she's out! the freak, is chic, oh, she's freak out! >> but are you -- >> no, it's that -- i'm not in a bunker. it doesn't look -- >> you're done? but are you done? are you done with being in the bunker? >> yeah, the bunker was like me being trapped in the unknown. that's the bunker. >> reporter: out of her bunker and ready to take a major step. >> i'm gonna go back onstage even if i have to crawl, even if i have to talk with my hands. i will. i will. i am celine dion, because today my voice will be heard for the first time, not just because i have to, or because i need to. it's because i want to. and i miss it.

>> you can see it. you can see yourself onstage. i can feel it -- >> absolutely. >> you can imagine it. it's gonna happen. >> you better be ready. but tell me, what color will you be wearing when you come see my show? can you imagine we dress again, the same color? hey, girlfriend. >> reporter: but this time, she says, will be a little different. the show doesn't always have to go on. >> i believe in myself, in my bravery. and i believe that i am smart. at 56, if i'm not smart and say, i cannot go on tonight, i know that i have a good team right now that will say, no show tonight. it's gonna be hard. it will probably happen. >> reporter: celine is determined, no matter what, to get her voice back. >> i'm not gonna scare my fans. i'm not gonna come home tonight and tell my kids that i had to stop the show. i'm gonna come onstage because i'm ready. and my vocal cords will not

scare me because i'm gonna be ready and i'm gonna hit those notes because they will not control my life. because i am not brave, i am smart, and i can't wait to go back onstage and hit whatever i can hit. i will come back and have a wonderful time. yes. so i don't wanna be scared of myself and questioning my music, my songs. i don't. i don't. because music is a language and it's in everybody's life. >> there's a kleenex box right there. >> oh, thank you so much. thank you. >> can you pass me one?

>> oh, so sorry. >> just one kleenex. >> my parents showed me better. >> sorry. >> that's okay. >> reporter: as i heard for myself, there's no doubt she's making progress. ♪ i believe i believe ♪ ♪ how did i get here i've been thinkin' about you more than i want to ♪ >> i can't stop singing now. >> you can't. >> i'm so sorry. >> no, i love it. >> every phrase -- >> every question, i'm singing it. >> this is my -- this is my favorite interview. the more you sing -- >> oh gosh. >> -- the happier i feel. >> yeah. >> reporter: celine's journey has been long. but if anything, she's resilient. >> is your voice 100% back? >> i would say not 100% back, but i'm 100% on it. >> you're 100% on it.

i like that. >> do you like? >> what is your message for your fans who have been waiting all this time? >> i want you to come and see me again. i would like to invite you to sing with me again. you've been my supporters for so many years. sometimes i've thought maybe -- maybe they forgot, you know? >> did you really worry they would forget you? did you really worry about that? >> well, worry in a way that -- do they realize how much, how much they are part of the show? the adrenaline, that's what we need. i just can't wait. i just can't wait. >> when do you think you'll be on stage again, for real? >> the question is -- i don't know. can i say john when? >> john, when can she be on stage? okay. she said she's not allowed to say. >> because i'm ready!

>> but it's soon. >> reporter: in other words stay tuned. celine, meanwhile, is staying positive. >> what song makes you the happiest when you're just -- what puts you in a good mood? ♪ be happy ♪ ♪ don't worry be happy ♪ >> you're back, girl. >> reporter: she's back all right and ready for what lies ahead. ♪ tomorrow tomorrow i'll sing for you tomorrow as long as the drone is there ♪ >> reporter: our thanks to celine for all her candor, her humor too. the biggest dream now, she says, a cure. i'm hoda kotb. for all of us at nbc news, good

down to shut down in morgan hill. you can see the stop traffic right there. a deadly crash involving several vehicles. this includes a big