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tv   The Late Show With Stephen Colbert  CBS  March 11, 2024 11:35pm-12:38am PDT

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out. i was trying to simulate being a macho driver. >> you have to limber up before you try that. >> yeah, take yoga. >> so new tires and see a doctor. >> something like that! you know what? that gang at sonoma raceway, they're great. so much over the years, just great times out there at the track. >> oh, man, i can't wait to take your car out there myself and see what it can really do. >> 12 turns, two and a half miles. >> we see it leaving the garage every weeknight peeling out. >> >> president biden is slamming former president trump for his mar-a-lago meeting with hungary's authoritarian leader, strongman viktor orban. >> donald trump is the former president hosting a world leader who is not meeting with the current president. >> do you want to play president? introducing the fisher-price presidential playset. it comes with everything you need to pretend you're the
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commander in chief: an official desk, american flags, and even your own autocrat. now you too can have pretend photo ops, fake important meetings, and sound presidential. >> ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. >> the fisher-price presidential playset. for ages 4 to 6 and 77 and over. >> announcer: it's "the late show with stephen colbert"! tonight... complaint of the union! plus, stephen welcomes kristen stewart! and tom hollander! featuring live louis cato and "the late show" band. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪
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>> stephen: oh! good to see you. hey, everybody. thank you so much. please have a seat. sit, state, said. thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. welcome one and all to "the late show." i'm your host, stephen colbert. [cheering] last night was the oscars. i want to congratulate my good friend and fellow strike force five member, jimmy kimmel, who did a great job hosting. and got to congratulate "oppenheimer," which took home so many awards, including best picture, best actor, best supporting actor, and they're telling me i gotta wrap it up. my wife evie, i love you. see you soon! kids, go to bed! chris nolan, we did it! don't look at the back of my suit. i broke it. last night's ceremony had many
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fun moments, like ryan gosling singing "i'm just ken," [cheering] arnold schwarznegger and danny devito reuniting, and john cena presenting best costume in the buff. good thing he held onto that card, 'cause we might have seen his maestro, if you know what i'm saying? his poor thing, if you catch my drift? his, uh, his oppen-penis. but it turned out cena wasn't actually naked. he was wearing a skin-toned junk-wrap. which is good, i suppose, but it was embarrassing when paul giammatti wore the same thing to the after party. looking good. giammatti is looking good. maybe the weirdest moment was the final category, best picture, when al pacino... al pacino'd. jim? >> this is the time for the last award of the evening. and it's uh, uh, my honor to present it.
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ten wonderful films were nominated, but only one will take the award for best picture. and i have to go to the envelope for that. and i will. here it comes. and my eyes see "oppenheimer." yes. >> stephen: you gotta imagine he's a nightmare at the deli counter. "it's, uh, it's time for me to order my sandwich. there are ten wonderful meats before me. only one can go home to my tummy. and i have to go to the grocery list for that. and i will. and here it comes. out of my pocket.
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and that is a tissue. and here it is, the real one. and my eyes see "ham." a ham with a great ass! yes, yes. congratulations, ham. now watch as i pay entirely in dimes. hoo-ah!" [applause and cheers] this weekend was also the unofficial kick-off of the general election. 'cause we've only got two candidates left, and they have starkly different messages. biden's message is: vote for me because trump is terrible, trump's message is: vote for me because i am terrible. here's trump on saturday, mocking the speech impediment joe biden has had since childhood. >> two nights ago, we all
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heard crooked joe's angry, dark, hate-filled rant of a state of the union address. wasn't it -- didn't it bring us together? remember he said "i'm going to bring the country t-tt-together." >> stephen: wow. you really want to go there? first of all, biden didn't stutter like that. second, if you want to make this a word-talkin' contest, you're one of the weirdest speakers in human history. here's trump later in that same speech, saying something. >> they are weaponizing law enforcement for high level election interference against joe biden's top and only political appointment, a guy named me. it's a guy named me. >> stephen: can he not remember his own name at this point? maybe that's why he puts it on all of his buildings. "nice to meet you. i'm...
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trump! [cheering] this is my beautiful wife... panera." it's that level of communication that has many questioning his mental fitness. but what some call brain damage, he calls brain advantage. >> you know, the fake news will say, "oh, he goes from subject to --" no, that's -- you have to be very smart to do that. you gotta be very smart. it's called, you know what it is? it's called spot checking. you are thinking about something when you're talking about something else. bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop. and then you get back to origi -- and they go "holy [bleep]. did you see what he just -- that's ama --" it's called -- it's called intelligence. >> stephen: yes. it's called intelligence. look no further than einstein's famous equation: "e equals bop, bop, bop, bop, bop holy [bleep]." [cheers and applause]
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squared? squared? but if being constantly distracted makes you smart, i'd like to congratulate america's next nobel laureate, my dog benny. he's incredible. he'll be focused on food, then squirrel, then ball, then doorbell, then doorbell on tv, it's bark, bark, bark, bark, bark. it's called intelligence. [cheers and applause] who's a good boy? who's a good boy? at this point, trump isn't even trying to hide his awfulness. his critics accuse him of being a wannabe dictator, so what does he do? he sits down with hungarian dictator and elephant seal barking for a trout, viktor orban. orban went down to mar-a-lago on friday for an official fake state visit with the not-president. orban is a bad guy. in the last decade, he has weakened the institutions of democracy, eroded the legal system, and eliminated effective opposition. ♪ did you ever know ♪ ♪ that you're my hero ♪ ♪ for trying to end democracy ♪
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♪ i can fly higher ♪ ♪ than an eagle ♪ ♪ 'cause you are the wind ♪ ♪ beneath my ♪ whale!" little lower. little lower. little low. it's no surprise that trump invited orban to mar-a-lago for an all-you-can-smooch butt-kiss buffet. 'cause he loves him some dictator, and he always has, according to new interviews with former national security adviser john bolton and former chief of staff john kelly, the trump administration statler and waldorf. according to john kelly, in private, how do i put this delicately? trump loves hitler. in fact, trump told kelly, "well, hitler did some good things." and the category is, phrases that should end your candidacy and/or birthday party.
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can i see "hitler did some good things"? it is number one answer! let's see the rest. "yum yum human flesh!" and "i am rfk jr." now, kelly bravely asked trump which good things hitler did, and trump responded "well, hitler rebuilt the economy." "and that's the end of his story, as far as i know. only read the first half of the book. love the mein, never got through the kampf." really? [applause] no, no, no. no, i don't want your pity. kelly had to give trump a bit of a history lesson. after trump expressed admiration for hitler's military staff's "loyalty," kelly pointed out to him the german generals as a group were not loyal to him, and in fact tried to assassinate him a ew times. trump didn't know that. "really?
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so it turns out the nazis had a bit of a dark side"? very hard to take this seriously. trump also loves the modern-day strongmen. according to bolton, trump likes that guys like erdogan in turkey get to put people in jail and you don't have to ask anybody's permission. that's called a dictatorship, sir. in a democracy, it can be hard to put even a guilty guy in jail. for instance, what's his name? >> a guy named me. there you go. there you go. oh! the massive news over the weekend. someone took a picture of kate middleton. here's why it's kind of a big deal. middleton had made no public appearances since she underwent abdominal surgery two months ago. that led to a lot of online speculation, including kate middleton is dead, and kate middleton is getting a divorce from prince william.
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or maybe both! she's getting a divorce while dead! it's all in today's sun, "zombie kate spotted getting her groove back with pete davidson" well, yesterday, the u.k. celebrated mother's day. or as they call it, bangers and mom. to celebrate, and to quiet all these rumors, kate released this picture. it's a beautiful shot of a mom and three happy kids. is what they want you to believe. oh, yes. because after the photo dropped, it was pulled from several news outlets after editors noticed that the image had been manipulated. how dare they? the one thing we know about royalty is what you see is what you get. what's next? are you going to tell us that the king isn't real? here's what the experts noticed. keen eyed observers saw kate's zipper and hair are misaligned, charlotte's hair had an artificial pattern, and a portion of charlotte's sleeve is missing. these are all photoshop errors,
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and not, as many had assumed, the result of centuries of inbreeding. yeah. i know it's hard for you because you love the royal family. you are such a royal watcher. today, kate admitted that she had edited the photo, and to put this scandal to rest, the palace has released the original image of princess kate skateboarding over a tiger. skateboarding, okay. speaking of suspicious cover stories, a new pentagon report has found no evidence of alien visits or hidden space craft. which can mean only one thing: they found evidence of alien visitors and hidden spacecraft. how do you know how i know? the actual name of the pentagon group that did the alien investigation is the all-domain anomaly resolution office. "we humans at the all domain anomaly resolution office assure you aliens do not exist. for more information, please send us magnesium extracted from your bones."
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or just send us your delicious delicious bones. the report also allegedly debunks theories that the government and private companies had reverse-engineered extraterrestrial technology. oh, really? well, if we haven't reverse engineered advanced alien tech, then how do you explain soft scrub? it's both smooth and abrasive! only quantum technology beyond our understanding can fight toilet ring, hard water, and limescale stains! and there's no way humans came up with the slogan "cleans from the first wipe." we got a great show for you tonight! my guests are kristen stewart and tom hollander. but when we come back, it's "meanwhile" y'all! stick around. ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> stephen: give it up for louis cato and "the late show" band, everybody. [humming]
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louis. oh, my goodness. oh, my goodness gracious, my lovely friends over there. today we've got two lovely guests coming up. wonderful british actor named tom hollander will be out here in a moment. he plays truman capote eight in "feud: capote vs. the swans" at first ms. kristen stewart will be out in a moment. the movie "love lies bleeding." folks, if you watch the show you know i spend most of my time in the news kitchen, mincing the day's finest cuts of duroc story pork to blend with the most topical white wine and cognac, juniper berries, and pistachios which i gently bake in a bain marie to create for you the delicate pate de campagne terrine that is my monologue. but sometimes, sometimes, folks, after getting thrown off a moving rail car by the hobos i betrayed to the yard boss, i scrape together the remnants of a half-eaten taco in my pocket and the tobacco from a cigarette butt and mash it into what's left of a very ripe grapefruit husk, then douse it all with everclear and set it on fire to cook up the vagabond's trash scrapple of news that is my segment...
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>> "meanwhile"! >> stephen: gotta learn circular breathing. that's the only oxygen tank i need. meanwhile, last week a whole-ass wheel just straight up fell off a boeing airplane during takeoff. take a look. jim, what have we got? taking off and... good-bye! in a statement, boeing said, "don't worry. no one was hurt because the wheel's fall was broken by a door that blew off one of our other planes." meanwhile, in new jersey news, a man tried to make a viral tiktok by recording himself dunking his head, face-first, in a barrel of pickles at a convenience store and deli. he then turned himself into the police. you can see a dramatic reenactment on this week's episode of "law & order: svu, special vlasic unit."
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meanwhile, a scorpion stung a man in his testicles while he slept at a las vegas hotel. in the hotel's defense, he did ask for a 6:00 a.m. wake-up. now, you know, you wanna believe this kind of thing is rare, but a hotel spokesperson said "the resort has protocols for all incidents and we can confirm they were followed in this incident." so it happens enough that they have protocols for it. "hey, welcome to caesar's palace. here's your room key. if you need anything, please dial 1 for the concierge, 2 for room service, and 3 for "snake-bit-my-taint." [applause] no, no, that's okay. meanwhile, in gluten news, archeologists have discovered the world's oldest bread in turkey. not to be confused with the world's oldest bread and turkey, which is at the port authority
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arby's. researchers say the bread dates to 6600 bc. which they were able to determine with such accuracy because it came with a little clip that said "best by 6599 bc." meanwhile, researchers say education might slow the pace of aging and increases longevity. but it's a bit of a devil's bargain. while you can add years to your life, they will be nerd years. [laughter] like this. [cheering] meanwhile, a 4,000-year-old lipstick uncovered in iran may be the oldest ever found. it explains maybelline's new slogan: "maybe she's born with it. maybe she died 4,000 years ago in iran." apparently, the ancient tube
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is uncannily similar to modern ones. which means it was discovered with a broken cap and covered in bagel crumbs at the bottom of your purse. meanwhile, movie star harrison ford says john williams' score for "indiana jones" follows him wherever he goes, saying, "when i had my last colonoscopy, they were playing it on the operating room speakers." even worse, this was the doctor's reaction when he saw his colonoscopy results. >> [screaming] ♪ ♪ >> stephen: meanwhile, after a recent incredible 35 points in one game, indiana state's star center robbie avila has been dubbed by the internet "cream abdul-jabbar". that's quite the nickname. other options they considered were milk chamberlain, and shaquille oatmeal. we'll be right back with kristen stewart!
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my first guest tonight is an oscar nominated actress you know from the "twilight" franchise, "clouds of sils maria," and "spencer." her new film is "love lies bleeding." >> hey. >> the machine is over there. >> it's broken. >> there you go. >> you are langston's daughter. he said old friend of mine. how is your old man? >> my old man. he's a piece of [...] we don't talk. >> your mom, you know where i could find her? >> why? >> just to talk. well, i'll tell you what. when you're feeling more friendly, give us a call.
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>> stephen: please welcome back to "the late show," kristen stewart. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ [cheering] nice to see you again. >> kristen: same. >> stephen: you look absolutely lovely. thank you for being here. >> kristen: likewise. >> stephen: take them. take them. you can take them because you are really fun to talk to. i really like talking to you and i know that you don't do talk shows that often so i'd like -- we want to talk about the film but i want to push this aside for second and go, what's going on? what's on your mind? >> kristen: free association. >> stephen: whatever you want to talk about. >> kristen: audience, people,
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me, here. i feel like i'm all over the place because i'm so excited that this movie is coming out. i'm stoked to talk to you about it and also prepping a movie that i'm going to direct. it seems like i was prompted. directing a movie. >> stephen: i am also stoked to talk about your new movie, "love lies bleeding," the new film. it's sort of a genre defying. it's a crime story. it's a love story. it's a family drama. how did the director, rose glass? >> kristen: yeah. >> stephen: rose glass. how did schieffer sell you on the idea or how did she approach you? >> kristen: she kind of approached me in her previous work. i watched "saint mod" and fell head over heels in love for her. i was like, i have been thinking so much about you. she was like i just wrote a movie for you and i was like
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"shut up." >> stephen: really, that's what happened? >> kristen: straight up. so lucky. she pitched it really funny. she was like, my first music was really successful and i've been asked what i want to do next. it's really annoying. every body wants me to make a strong female character movie and so i just made a movie about a body builder. i was like, great. she was like, okay, so you want me to be strong? i'm just going to be a brat about it so he made a movie about really very weak, flaccid kind of like smoking internalized person that it is then awoken by the epitome of exuberance and strength. >> stephen: a literal strong woman. >> kristen: literally. but that literal strong woman is kind of out of her mind and their projections take over and it becomes like a fever dream. does love destroy or does it build us up to be the best we can be? >> stephen: there is a lot of
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buzz about this "rolling stone" cover of yours. before i show this cover, i just want you to know and the audience to know that i think it's a perfectly lovely cover. we were asked by cbs not to show it. they thought it would be not a good idea for us to show it and i don't understand why because there is the cover right there. [cheering] i want to say that you will better in a jock strap than i ever did. why do you think this upset a lot of people to see you in this. there are people, there are people like losing their mind on x going "rolling stone turns kristen stewart into a man to push gender ideology on its readers." >> kristen: so scary. >> stephen: why do you think people got upset about this? >> kristen: well. okay, let's keep this light. you know, i think it's a
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little... it's a little ironic because i feel like i've seen like a lot of male pubic hair on the cover of things. i've seen like a lot of hands in pants and unbuttoned -- i think there's a certain overt acknowledgment of like of female sexuality that is, you know, has its own volition in a way that is annoying for people who are sexist and homophobic. [cheers and applause] >> stephen: i would also say that i've seen... i've certainly seen more revealing covers on "rolling stone" or "sports illustrated" for that matter. >> kristen: is not remotely explicit. >> stephen: violates public expectations of female sexuality as opposed to how you're presenting it here. >> kristen: yes. because female sexuality isn't supposed actually want anything than to be had and that feels like it's protruding in a way that might be annoying.
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but [bleep] you. [applause] >> stephen: the article revisits. >> kristen: but i never will! sorry. >> stephen: i think that's why they're mad at you. >> kristen: i'm so glad i landed that. >> stephen: article reveals a surreal time in 2012 when donald trump attacked you on twitter. you had this to say in the article in response to that. would you mind reading this for america? >> kristen: i love you. >> stephen: great. >> kristen: i said of course he had to weigh in on my tarring and feathering, it's like what is this 20-year-old who has no idea about life doing to this man? he is such a little baby and [bleep] you, bitch. >> stephen: that's nice. have to take a quick break. we'll be right back with more kristen stewart, everybody.
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♪ ♪ >> stephen: hey, everybody. we're back with the star of the new film "love lies bleeding," kristen stewart. you and your fiance, here we go. here is you and your fiance, dylan meyer. [applause] you have a production company together. do you recommend working with
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your partner? >> kristen: i definitely recommend for anyone who is so obsessed with their jobs and it is personal for them to find someone that you don't have to shield them from that, you know what i mean? >> stephen: were you nervous? a working relationship is not the same thing necessarily as a romantic or loving relationship. >> kristen: it's true. but my job is so personal. i feel like i don't really have a job. if i couldn't share with her and make with her and collaborate with her i would do it with other people and we wouldn't be as close. i need to have that. and she is so much better and smarter and cooler and hotter than me. i literally and like whoa, i like to still your brain and put them together and make stuff. >> stephen: what do you want to make? >> kristen: a bunch of movies. it's so funny, we get all the submissions and is just purely -- i'm going to lean right in. every main character hates guys, hates them so much. everything is like a very
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overtly feminist and i think what we wanted to do is not bad. what we would like to do is stop underlining the obvious and start sort of looking at adjacent perspectives and not hang a lantern -- stop marginalizing ourselves. let's tell the same stories but from skewed spot. well-worn territory that actually hasn't been trodden on. you know what i mean? >> stephen: sure. women have just as many stories as men is what you're saying. >> kristen: yeah. and we like boys too, a lot. >> stephen: i know you have directed shorter work but let's get back to this thing you were saying before that you might be directing something soon. can you tell us what that might be? do know what it is? >> kristen: i know what it is. i've known for a long time. i've been talking about it for a long time. i have open booked my life, ask me anything, i'll tell you so i've been talking about this movie for six or seven years
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potentially that long which is wild. i don't know if it will be good. but good ones take a long time. this one really asked kind of fought tooth and nail to have its own life. we are going to go she waited in latvia. i -- just have grown up loving her so much and we are casting and scouting and it has its own body and its own will and blood in the movie has kind of taken over my life. >> stephen: talking of incredibly talented women that you've worked with, here you are with jodie foster. back in 2002, you and jody were in "the panic room" together and like you, she was a child actress and had great success, also directs and is openly gay. do you guys keep in touch? >> kristen: last night i was watching the oscars and when she pops up, the first 10 minutes of the oscars, i was like
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emotionally exhausted 10 minutes into the show because -- >> stephen: kimmel's monologue? >> kristen: i love him. i love him. >> stephen: i do too. >> kristen: crying. jodie so sweet. her face, i don't know what it is. there are certain people that you kind of like hold forever, dude. it's not like we talk all the time. >> stephen: what do you remember from doing "panic room" with her? how old were you? >> kristen: ten. she actually threw me a birthday party when i turned 11 with a marriott you band. yeah, she was like, don't forget. i was so obsessed with being on set and working. and not going to school and not doing all the right things. i was like i will make movies until i die and she was like, you should do anything but that. because you are a real human being and felt productive and --
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protective and nice. i understand. i see a kid onset, how about college? you want to direct movies? you should explore all the options. what an incredible conversation. >> stephen: i'm enjoying it. kristin, thank you so much for being here. lovely to see you. "love lies bleeding" is in theaters now. kristen stewart, everybody. we'll be right back with the star of "feud," tom hollander. health is an accomplishment.♪ ey ♪concerns of getting screened faded away♪ ♪to my astonishment.♪ ♪my doc gave me a script i got it done without a delay.♪ ♪i screened with cologuard and did it my way.♪ cologuard is a one-of-a-kind way to screen for colon cancer that's effective and non-invasive. it's for people 45 plus at average risk, not high risk. false positive and negative results may occur. ask your provider for cologuard. ♪i did it my way!♪ leftover chicken, scallions, cheese... what am i gonna make with this? "may-ow" mayo?
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♪ ♪ >> stephen: hey, everybody. welcome back to "the late show"! my next guest ce soir is an actor you know from "in the loop," "the night manager," and "the white lotus." he now stars in "feud: capote vs. the swans." >> let me ask you a question, jack. why do you always forgive me? >> who says i do? >> i'll tell you why. because apologies, when heartfelt, matter because that is how the heart is built. it wants to forgive. >> does it? i think this may be wishful thinking on your part. >> no, i've seen it. on death row, with those boys, in kansas. i've seen people want both to forgive and to be forgiven.
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>> stephen: please welcome to the "the late show," tom hollander. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ it's lovely to have you on. as you know, because i've used you with some of your old lines backstage, i'm a big fan of your work with armando iannucci and i love you as truman capote in "feud: capote vs. the swans." i understand, is this really, this is a rule 20 years in the making for you? >> tom: well, it's been a role i addition for audition for 20 years ago and didn't get and then my number came up again. >> stephen: this role?
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or to play capote. >> tom: to play capote. in a different -- we can both wear glasses. navies are better. they are too small for your face. >> stephen: you have filthy glasses. i'm going to clean them while you talk. >> tom: i did just clean them. see if there's any microphone in your earpiece. i didn't spend the 20 years thinking i must get that part back. but a different script came up that maybe i was more appropriate for us what happened. >> stephen: growing up in the u.k., what did you noah about truman capote? because he was kind of a staple of talk shows and that sort of thing here. >> tom: not so much that. as a writer, i knew him as a writer. it was only auditioning for that first one, they sent a whole lot
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of talk shows stuff which i watched. and then i realized the whole ddick cavett-this event. >> stephen: he was on the dick cavett show. he was on carson too. >> tom: he couldn't stop himself going on talk shows. >> stephen: he wasn't writing that much. >> tom: he wasn't writing. he was drinking a lot. he got an instant hit of being famous and feeling the celebrity that he was. i think he got kind of attached to being a celebrity maybe. which, he got attached to things that were not very good for him, repeatedly. >> stephen: you have an amazing cast of actresses in this. diane lane, chloe 7a, naomi watts, molly ringwald, demi moore, calista flockhart, was in holding court? this of a greta lee talented actresses.
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>> tom: the person who on a competition to go to a premier photo. >> stephen: perhaps in auc auction. i understand you have a 1-year-old now, congratulations. >> tom: no, he's six months. >> stephen: own not even one. has it changed your work or your approached your career? how has it changed you? >> tom: it's made the future, it's changed the future. >> stephen: how so? >> tom: because now they're sort of is one. there's him. >> stephen: but before six months ago, it was just -- >> tom: suicide was an option. now it isn't. now it isn't. i can't do that because i need to look after him. >> stephen: yes, exactly. you would never forgive yourself. >> tom: no. he's a very sweet chap. and he seems very happy to be
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alive, which is... >> stephen: that's a nice thing. they are pretty excited about the start of every day. >> tom: yes, everything, every person. >> stephen: do you talk? do you tell him things about the world? >> tom: icing stupid nonsense things to him every day. >> stephen: what do you saying? >> tom: [humming] >> stephen: how does it go over. is it a good audience? >> tom: boopy doopy doo. >> stephen: don't stop. i want to warn our affiliates we might be going long. [laughter] that's wonderful. >> tom: it's a lot of that. >> stephen: that's good. the reason i ask you talk to your son because we had a
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daughter first and when my daughter was kept on thinking "i can't wait until you can talk back." i can't wait until we can have a conversation. hey, that's a tree. they are great. >> tom: nervous of what he's going to say. yes, of course i want him to speak but i don't want him to start asking difficult questions. >> stephen: those don't come for a little bit. >> tom: how long will i have the advantage? >> tom: until he's 12. >> tom: i need to stay fit. >> stephen: there's that moment when your son goes to grip your hand and does that squeezing contest with you like we men do and he wins. >> tom: yes. >> stephen: that is a significant moment in your life. >> tom: we had a steering competition only yesterday. [laughter] and i won it. >> stephen: congratulations. wow.
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[laughter] >> tom: he didn't know it was a steering competition. and also he doesn't blink which is astonishing. did you remember that? babies don't really blink. >> stephen: they have so much moisture, they don't really need to. >> tom: he was staring at me and i was thinking, do you think i'm a complete idiot? you don't know that already. you sense it instinctively. then he blinked and i thought "thank god." anyway, i'm going to end for a bit but then i won't mind losing to him. >> stephen: good luck with all of that. >> tom: yes. i mustn't crush his joy out of him. [laughter] >> stephen: that sounded so english. tom, thank you so much for being here. so lovely to meet you. the season finale of "feud:
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capote vs. the swans" airs wednesday on fx. the entire season will be available thursday on hulu. it's tom hollander, everybody. we'll be right back.
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>> stephen: that's it for "the late show." tune in tomorrow when my guests will be diane lane and patton oswalt. now stick around for "after midnight" with taylor tomlinson. good night!

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