tv The Late Show With Stephen Colbert CBS April 19, 2024 11:35pm-12:38am PDT
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>pretty good. >> i don't even smoke and all thasounds awesome. >> i know, same. >> this is so funny. i came from central texas. >> yes. >> culture shock. >> yeah, culture shock, that's right. ú>> it's all good. >> my wife grew up in rural tennessee. we got here and she's like oh. okay. >> culture shock. it's very >> cultue. shock. it's very on that note happy munching. >> be safe. >> have a blessed 4-20. >> have a blessed night. "the late show" with stephen colbert >> this year, super tuesday is looking less than super because we already know who the nominees will be. this predictability has resulted in cable news ratings falling by "as much as half." >> every election cycle, millions of americans count on analysis from steve kornacki
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and his big board. >> is it going to stay at 97? is it going to fall down? anything like that? >> but on this super tuesday, since no one is watching because we all know what's going to happen, msnbc is introducing a less predictable segment. it's steve korangutanki and the banana board. sure, we know who the nominees will be. but what will steve korangutanki do next? will he roll on the floor this way? will he shuffle on the floor that way? did he murder steve kornacki? all we know is it's more fun to talk about a killer primate then when nikki haley should dropout of the race. so to tune into our super tuesday election special with steve korangutanki. msnbc. we could really use a mitch mcconnell sex scandal right about now. >> announcer: it's "the late show with stephen colbert!" tonight... super snooze-day! plus, stephen welcomes senator bernie sanders! and musical guest bleachers.
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featuring louis cato and "the late show" band. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> stephen: how ya doin'? oh, fantastic. beautiful. good to see you. happy tuesday. happy tuesday. super tuesday. there you go. lovely. lovely. hey, everybody! welcome. welcome. thank you very much. you're very kind. please have a seat, everybody. >> stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen!
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>> stephen: thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. welcome one and all to "the late show." i am your host, stephen colbert. [cheering] ladies and gentlemen. you know why the excitement of course. it's super tuesday, the biggest single day on the presidential primary calendar, so let's dive right into the story that will impact our nation for generations to come. a chilean tv broadcast cut beer ads into "star wars." that's right. the internet today is abuzz that just moments ago, in 2003, a television broadcast in chile played this actual footage, which, 21 years later, has now gone viral. >> i understand you've become quite a good pilot yourself. and he was a good friend. which reminds me, i have something here for you. your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough. ♪ ♪
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cerveza crystal! >> stephen: now, it was subtle, but you may have noticed a tasteful product placement for the chilean beer cerveza cristal. i'm sorry. i mispronounced that ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ that's not all. they also edited ads into a scene where luke finds cerveza cristal in the dagobah system and into this scene with the emperor. >> it is pointless to resist my son. ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ >> stephen: and of course, the devastating moment at the end of "empire strikes "luke, i am your lager." it is completely insane... that they only did this with
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"star wars." 'cause the smooth drinking taste of cerveza cristal fits seamlessly into any classic movie. [dramatic music] ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ >> you have my... >> and have you my... and my... cerveza cristal! [screaming] >> ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ >> stephen: but you can all rest assured, here at "the late show," we will never stoop to that kind of blatant product placement. isn't that right, louis? >> louis: that's right, steve! ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪
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♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ >> stephen: now, as i believe i mentioned earlier in the broadcast, today is super tuesday, or as they call it in chile: cinco de marcho. it's the biggest day of the u.s. presidential primary, with voters heading to the polls in alabama, california, colorado, oklahoma, utah, north carolina, tennessee, maine, arkansas, massachusetts, minnesota, alaska, texas, vermont, virginia, and american samoa. and if you need a way to remember all the super tuesday states, just use the helpful mnemonic, "account mamma tv vas." now, with a biden-trump rematch looking inevitable at this point cable news has been struggling to generate super tuesday excitement this year. check out cnn, who sent john berman out to cover all the hot action at a mail ballot drop-box. >> the polls are open in castle rock, colorado, in a manner of speaking. that's because, in essence,
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the polls are always open in colorado. the major means of voting here is by mail or by dropbox. you can see the dropbox right there behind me. "voter ballot drop box," it says, which is a sign that it is a dropbox. [laughter] >> stephen: thanks, john. that clears up a lot of confusion. at least that's what it says in my teleprompter here, which is a sign that it clears up a lot of confusion. now, there's one thing that could still drive voter turnout today. and that's that taylor swift told her 282 million instagram followers to vote in super tuesday's primaries but refrained from endorsing any specific candidates or political party. we haven't seen a celebrity take a stance this boldly neutral since rob lowe went to an nfl game with a hat that said "nfl." he was just rooting for the contract, right?
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anyway, spoiler: it's biden/trump. it's always been biden/trump. it will always be biden/trump. but not if you ask the voters, who seem to still be in denial. in a recent poll, almost 50% of respondents said they believe "it is likely democrats will replace biden with another candidate before the election." no. no, they won't. it's trump versus biden. stop making up election fanfic! "ooh, what if tom brady comes out of retirement and runs for president? he could make gronk secretary of gronking! and then they kiss." this speculation has gotten so out of hand that today, former first lady michelle obama's office had to formally announce that she "will not be running for president" in 2024. which means she's running! [cheering] methinks she doth protest. i for one hope she picks gronk
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as her running mate. but it is gonna be joe biden. not only that, joe is saying it's no more mr. nice joe. he's unveiling a new strategy: go for trump's jugular. you get him, joe! yeah! go for the jugular. just one problem with that plan good luck finding a jugular in that chin-scrotum. now, advisers say that biden is convinced he'll rattle trump if he taunts him daily, which will cause trump to go haywire in public. yes, he'll go crazy, as opposed to his current rational public message: "me likey mein kampf bing bing bing bang russia! oh! ohhhh! oh!" [applause] thank you. thank you. the white house also believes an
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aggressive strategy will dampen concerns about biden's age "by showing that at 81, he can still throw a scranton punch." "that's right! come on, jack. here's comes the ol' pennsylvania haymaker express. hold on. brace yourself! here we go. here we go. there you go. now hold still. don't move. here it comes. here it comes. hold on. right there. come back here. come back here, buddy." but the president isn't fighting alone. oh, no. he's backed by joe biden's superfans, many of them older, and most of them women. that's right. taylor's got the swifties, beyonce's got the bey-hive, but joe's got the early bird special! i will have the scrod. but not all joe-boosters are older. one 28-year-old told reporters he loves biden. "and i feel like i'm the only one.
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does anybody care that i exist?" you're not the only one that feels that way. in fact, it's nikki haley's campaign slogan. ooh, speaking of nikki haley, nikki haley. yesterday she spoke to supporters in texas and took a victory lap for being the last woman standing. >> this has been a whirlwind. yeah, i announced probably just over a year ago. we had 14 people in the race. i defeated a dozen of the fellas. i just have one more fella i gotta catch up to. >> stephen: "that fella? my lyft driver. he's taking me back to south carolina where they do not like me!" um, oh, there's some rich guy news. you know rich people? there's news. according to the bloomberg billionaires index, amazon founder jeff bezos has surpassed elon musk as the world's richest person. congratulations, jeff.
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it's the second list you've topped this year, after world's most divorced man. as of monday, bezos's net worth was $200 billion, while musk's was $198 billion, and luxury brand ceo bernard arnault's net worth was $197 billion. 197 billion? okay, poory. embarrassing much? ya know what? don't even bother showing up to this year's "eyes wide shut" party. nobody wants to spank you in the gazebo." bezos -- i just said gazebo and then bezos. that sounds good. bezos gazebos. i bet he's got a gazebo. if i was bezos i'd have a gazebo. bezos is not afraid to show off his billions.
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he's got two mansions on a private island known as "billionaire bunker," and a $500 million superyacht, which features a helicopter landing pad, a swimming pool, and a mermaid resembling his fiancee lauren sanchez at the bow. sounds a little bit over the top, but that's just how men express their love. that's why on the hood of my car i have an evie bobblehead. [applause] sure! evie! evie! okay. there's some bad news for college kids looking to party. because after heightened levels of crime during spring break, miami beach has announced that they are "breaking up" with spring breakers. oh, that's terrible! and it explains pitbull's latest track "i'm sad" parentheses "clap that booty" featuring marc anthony. doesn't matter what emotion you have. clap that booty. city residents have had enough of the destructive behavior from visiting college kids, with one business owner speaking out. >> on ocean drive, mango's nightclub owner david
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wallach has seen it first hand. >> last year, i was in 16 stampedes. >> stephen: 16 stampedes. well, that's what miami gets for holding their annual "running of the chads." miami's also cracking down on what you're allowed to do on the beach, as miami has prohibited smoking cigarettes, narcotics and marijuana, large tents, and loud music, no surprise, they've also banned the consumption of alcohol. &-ú. >> ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal! ♪ >> stephen: we got a great show for you tonight! my guest is senator bernie sanders. but when we come back, science! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> announcer: "the late show
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with stephen colbert" sponsored by the makers of zyrtec. zyrtec. zyrtec allergy relief works fast and lasts a full 24 hours so dave can be the... deliverer of dance. ok, dave! let's be more than our allergies. zeize the day with zyrtec. no two bodies are the same. some pads, never got that message. but, always flexfoam did! it protects against different flows for up to zero leaks. and it flexes to fit all bodies, for up to zero feel. feel it yourself with always flexfoam. what is cirkul? cirkul is the fuel you need to take flight. cirkul is the energy that gets you to the next level. cirkul is what you hope for when life tosses lemons your way. cirkul, available at walmart and drinkcirkul.com. to help protect from hiv, i prep without pills.
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with apretude, a prescription medicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. you must be hiv negative, to receive apretude and get tested before each injection. if you think you were exposed to hiv or have flu-like symptoms, tell your doctor right away. apretude does not prevent other sexually transmitted infections. practice safer sex to reduce your risk. don't take apretude if you're allergic to it or taking certain medicines, as they may interact. tell your doctor if you've had liver or kidney problems or mental health concerns. if you have a rash or other allergic reactions, stop apretude and get medical help right away. serious side effects include allergic reactions, liver problems, and depression. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions and headache. you must receive apretude as scheduled. ask your doctor about long-acting apretude. and prep without pills. save at apretude.com. [ cellphone ringing ] phone call from the boss? sorry. and prep without pills. outdoor time is me time.
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i hear that. that's why we protect all your vehicles here. but hey...nothing wrong with sticking it to the boss. ooooh, flo, you gonna take that? why would that concern me? because you're...the... aren't you the..? huh...we never actually discussed hierarchy. ok, why don't we just stick to letting dave know how much he can save when he bundles his home or auto with his boat or rv. wait, i thought jamie was the boss. [ laughter ] it's funny because i'm not boss material! hi, i'm stacey, and i've lost 60 pounds on golo. (guitar music) this belt i used to wear, way down at the first and second notch, it's the only thing i've kept from before losing weight and i'm keeping this because i'm never going back. (♪♪) [indistinct chatter]
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[cheers and applause] louis, what where we just listening to? what was that? >> louis: a brand-new composition by louis cato and "the late show" band entitled "one too many pieces." >> stephen: i love it. it's beautiful. it's powerful. coming up in just a few moments, we have a guest. quick quiz here. what guest have i had more than any other? anyone want to guess? what guest have i had more than any other? >> oliver. >> stephen: yes, john oliver, that's exactly right. 18 times. my guest this evening is coming in at number two with a bullet, bernie sanders will be here in just one moment. >> louis: young man. [applause] >> stephen: number three is john dickerson, cbs news. number four, neil degrasse tyson.
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for those of you keeping score at home. okay, hold on one second. mm-hmm. that's not coffee. what is this? ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ [applause] please tell me they are a sponsor. are they... nope. we're doing it for free. folks, i love science. it's how we made the groundbreaking discovery that birds and bees are super horny for each other. and i like to bring you all the latest science news in my sciency science segment. >> the sound of science! ♪ hello, science ♪ ♪ my old friend ♪ >> stephen: first up. [cheering] a little delayed. a little delayed. first up, climate researchers say that the environment of the desert planet in "dune" is plausible, according to science.
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it's upsetting to know that in the future, our entire planet could be turned into a desert hellscape. but what's truly terrifying... is knowing that even 10,000 years in the future, there will still be bagpipes. researchers used computer modeling and found that the climate on arrakis is conceivable. but noted that the book describes polar ice caps receding in the summer heat. but it would be far too hot at the poles during the summer for ice caps to exist at all. of course, the source of all that heat: chalamet's cheek bones. [cheers and applause] next up, deep sea science news from chile. home of... ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ you can't even get this [bleep] in the united states is my
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understanding. right? we are not actually selling any beer right now. chilean researchers just announced the stunning discovery of the world's newest "walking" fish, a bright red creature of the deep. ooh, cool! let's take a look at the little fellaaaaaghhhh! looks like a trout banged a muppet. you can see the fish's discovery play out in the new documentary: "what the [bleep] is nemo?" next up, according to a new study, skipping your dog's walk is a bigger deal than you think. those findings from renowned scientist dr. scruffles t. bellyrub. you may remember him from his other landmark study "there's a squirrel outside the window and someone needs to kill it." evidently, you can't just open the back door and let them trot around out there, as scientists warn, the typical yard just doesn't offer enough stimulation and only hanging out in the backyard is like reading the same book again and again.
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oh, so now you're telling me i shouldn't be forcing my dog benny to re-read "the lord of the rings"? who prophesied that the witch king of angmar could not be killed by the hand of a man? glorfindel! read it again! [sighs] next up, new research shows that "men and women who wore heels the most became better, more efficient walkers." and now scientists are asking could wearing high heels be good for you? well, i certainly hope so. [groaning] [cheers] [laughter] next up, "a new study has revealed potential health risks associated with tattoos" because additives to tattoo inks have "possible side effects, including flatulence, nausea,
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stomach cramps, and diarrhea." which is bound have a big impact on someone like harry styles. i mean, just look at this video. [farting] [laughter] still sexy. next up, according to -- and get this -- a new study, just two cans of soda per week is too much, and drinking just two 12-ounce cans of pop per week can effectively erase the heart health gains made during exercise. but you know what will never erase your heart health gains? ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ ♪ cerveza cristal ♪ we'll be right back with bernie sanders! ♪ ♪
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[cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ welcome back. >> senator sanders: good to be here. >> stephen: thank you for having me on your show. >> senator sanders: [laughs] any time. >> stephen: listen. we all knew that super tuesday was coming, you know, there's no stopping it. by the way, would you mind saying the word super tuesday? >> senator sanders: super tuesday. >> stephen: okay. would you mind shouting the word super tuesday? >> senator sanders: super tuesday! >> stephen: around here at "the late show" we love hearing bernie sanders yelling the word "soup." >> senator sanders: i don't
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understand it but i'm sure it's a good joke. >> stephen: you are known for ordering soup. >> senator sanders: okay. [laughs] >> stephen: it's not a complex joke. [laughter] as someone who spent his life trying to push our nation forward, how does it feel for you to see so many voters returning to a person that i, for one, thought had been politically discredited even among his own party, donald trump. >> senator sanders: it's distressing. to say the least. and what i am concerned about is i think that many people don't understand what a trump presidency will look like. and it will be a disaster not only for our country but i think for the world. and if you look... [applause] and if you look at, stephen, if you just look at the issues, i don't want to rattle them all
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off, but take something like climate change. every sane person on this earth understands that the world is getting warmer. i mean, right now in texas there is a horrible forest fire, the worst they've ever had. we've seen fires all of the world, heat waves, storms, unprecedented. truth is, trump doesn't even believe in the concept of climate change. will work with the fossil fuel industry to increase oil production et cetera. that will send a signal all over the world that the fight against climate change has basically been lost. and i wonder what kind of planet our kids and grandchildren are -- will inherit. that's one thing. then you look at women's rights. my god. women have struggled forever to be full citizens of this country, to be able to control their own bodies. if trump wins, and his republican colleagues, a massive setback to women's rights and the right of women to control their own bodies. in terms of economics, we have
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massive income and wealth inequality. i think trump's proudest achievement is giving huge tax breaks to billionaires and on and on it goes. so i hope that during the time that we have that we are going to be able to articulate to the american people especially working people what a disaster trump has been and will be for ordinary workers and that president biden needs to be reelected. [applause] >> stephen: did you hear that jeff bezos is once again the richest man in the world, beating out elon musk. that's exciting stuff, right? anything you want to say to mr. bezos to congratulate him? >> senator sanders: don't get me going. you know that, stephen. you did that on purpose. >> stephen: what? >> senator sanders: all right, i'm going to get going.
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[cheering] we should all -- we don't talk about it in congress. we don't talk about it much in the media, but we have more income and wealth inequality in america today than we've ever had in our history. three people, including bezos, including musk, three people own more wealththan the bottom half of american society so that working class is struggling. a 60% of our people living paycheck to paycheck. you've got a handful of these billionaires with incredible wealth and incredible power. and i know, it sounds radical but maybe we should create an economy that works for all, not just for mr. bezos and mr. musk. [cheers and applause] >> stephen: we have to take a quick break. we'll be right back with more senator bernie sanders, everybody. stick around. so i didn't think i needed swiffer,
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>> stephen: hey, everybody. we're back here with the author of, hold on, "it's okay to be angry about capitalism." senator bernie sanders. now, just a little while ago, shortly before our rehearsal today, arizona senator kyrsten sinema announced she will not be seeking reelection this fall. [applause] >> senator sanders: [laughs] >> stephen: obviously a lot of people are going to miss her. how much are you going to miss her? >> senator sanders: not at all.
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>> stephen: elected as a democrat. tell me why. >> senator sanders: i want to make the point. way back when, i know it seems like a century ago. but in the midst of covid three years ago, working with the president, we passed the american rescue plan which went a long way to take us out of the terrible economic downspin we were in and help us address the pandemic. what we understood is that bill which was really consequential was an emergency bill. economic downturn, covid. we said "all right, let's deal with the structural crises facing america. the housing crisis, the child care crisis, the health care crisis. we can do better for working people. we work with the president for something we called build back better. we had zero republican support. we had 48 people in the democratic caucus prepared to transform this country on behalf of the working class of america. two people, sinema being one
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two people, sinema being one, manchin the other refused to support us and we couldn't pass it so i will not miss senator sinema. >> stephen: you hae not stated whether you're going to announce for running again. "washington post" said this. "allies urge bernie sanders to run for reelection. we won't let him retire." senator sanders. [applause] senator sanders, are you being held captive in washington, d.c.? >> senator sanders: [laughs] >> stephen: and if so, just say "no, stephen. i'm fine." >> senator sanders: [laughs] >> stephen: are you going to run? >> senator sanders: um. >> stephen: they won't let you resign. >> senator sanders: there is a constitutional issue there. but we'll make -- people in vermont are not all that excited about never ending campaigns. trust me, we'll make that decision at the appropriate
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time. >> stephen: a recent poll says 73% of registered voters think biden is too old to be president. you are one year older than him. are you worried about his age? >> senator sanders: i'm worried about a lot of things. but i think the media has fixated a little bit too much on age. [applause] look. age is a factor, all right? but what you want to look at is the totality of the person and what he or she accomplishes. if you look at what biden has done, unemployment today, for the last two years, we've had unemployment under 4%, unprecedented in the last 50 years. we've created hundreds of thousands of decent-paying jobs. we have finally begun to take a step forward in lowering the outrageous cost of prescription drugs in this country. we are rebuilding our crumbling infrastructure. we are investing in sustainable energy.
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those are real achievements. so i think rather than saying "oh, he made another gaffe today. oh, he doesn't walk all that well." you know, compare what he has done and what he wants to do with where trump is coming from, i think people will come out for biden big time. [applause] >> stephen: the state of the union address to a joint session of congress is this thursday. we'll be here live afterwards making the jokes. if bernie sanders was giving the state of the union address on thursday, what would he say the state of our union is? >> senator sanders: god, i wish i was giving that address. matter fact, now that you mentioned it. >> stephen: you gave it a shot. >> senator sanders: i gave it a shot. this is what i would say. i would say that in the last couple of years, we've made some progress on a number of important issues. we have a long way to go. this is the greatest country on earth. this is the wealthiest nation on earth.
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we should not have the highest rate of childhood poverty of any major nation on earth. [applause] we should not be the only wealthy country that doesn't guarantee health care to all people as a human right. [applause] we should not have a federal minimum wage of $7.25 an hour. we should not have, as you just mentioned, billionaires and large corporations not paying a nickel in federal income tax. we should lead the world in transforming our energy system to save the planet for our kids and grandchildren. those are some of the issues. but i think what the president has got to recognize is that there are a lot of people who are hurting out there. people going to the grocery store, can't afford food, can't afford to fill up their gas tanks, working incredible hours, having a hard time taking care of their kids or their parents.
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so we have made some progress but the president has got to understand we have a long way to go. we have to have the courage, stephen, and this is not easy, to take on a very powerful corporate ruling class whose greed in many ways is destroying this country. we got to take them on and create an economy for all, not the few. [cheers and applause] >> stephen: we are taking another break here, but when we come back, more bernie sanders, everybody. stick around. i can't believe i get to work at target! i hope she knows she's getting deals automatically! oh i'd tell her if it wasn't a dream! looks like pamela just let that guy know he can get unlimited same-day delivery! and she's gonna save an extra five percent with a target circle card! what's that? oh no, i don't want to wake up! there's too many deals! uh, you are awake. and the deals are real! then how do you explain abe lincoln over by the chips?
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>> stephen: hey, everybody. we're back with the author of "it's okay to be angry about capitalism," senator bernie sanders. all right. so what is it that makes you angriest about capitalism? because we live in a capitalistic system. >> senator sanders: what makes me angry is the massive inequalities that exist. look, a few blocks away from here, there are people sleeping out on the street. people are dying because they can't afford health care, and you've got three people who own more wealthy than half of american society. nobody will ever convince me that that is morally or economically acceptable. >> stephen: what do you say to the people who say capitalism makes this the land of opportunity? >> senator sanders: it doesn't. >> stephen: taken advantage of that opportunity. >> senator sanders: i'm not saying these guys are breaking the law. i'm just saying that as an american citizen, i think
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massive inequality is absolutely immoral, and it's bad economics because it spills over to our political system where these guys and their super pacs are spending hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars to elect people who represent the rich and the powerful. it spills over to our economy where in sector after sector, you have a handful of large corporations controlling what goes on and engaging in a lot of price-fixing. so we need a vibrant democracy. we need an economy that works for all. we don't need a few people on top with such incredible wealth and power. [applause] >> stephen: well stated. i understand where you're coming from. since we do live in a capitalistic society, let's look at the glass is half-full. what makes you happiest about capitalism? i'll start. it's the money. [laughter] is there anything good that you like about capitalism? >> senator sanders: yeah, we've got a tremendous diversity of ice cream.
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i like the ice cream. a lot of great restaurants. look, there's a lot -- when i talk about capitalism, i'm not talking about mom-and-pop stores, small businesses. we are talking about the concentration of ownership in the hands of a few. >> stephen: i'm going to talk about a hearing that was earlier this year, you were chairing a senate hearing where one of the republican senators got up. markwayne mullin got up and he was going to fight a guy from the teamsters who is testifying right there in the room. sean o'brien. he was going to figt. a, why did you stop it? and second -- >> senator sanders: [laughs] would have been good tv, i know, you're right. should have thought of it. >> stephen: super bowl ratings. to what degree has the senate change since you got there? was lamar alexander threatening to jack slap somebody into next tuesday? >> senator sanders: not in a million years.
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look, trump has helped foment right-wing extremism and disrespect, i think, for a lot of things. and you're seeing more of that, not only in the congress, you're seeing it in state legislatures, people saying outrageous things, doing outrageous things. you're seeing people sending out christmas cards posing with massive numbers of weapons. i think we are moving in a bad direction, and i hope very much we can turn that around because stephen, what i do want to tell you as someone who's had the opportunity to run for president and has been to every state in the country and this is the truth, there are decent people all over the place, people who love this country and want to see us do well who are sick and tired of this very bitter partisanship and the kind of hatred that we are seeing today. we've got to bring this people to stand up and reclaim our country. [applause] >> stephen: senator sanders, thank you so much for being here.
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>> stephen: performing "jesus is dead" from their upcoming self-titled album, "bleachers!" ♪ ♪ ♪ each night i pray that i'll meet god entering the worry of my thoughts on him ♪ ♪ there's nothing better ♪ ♪ than to be ♪ ♪ all phantom thread with somebody, so nice ♪ ♪ a kid i used to babysit drinks himself off ♪ ♪ a dimes square bench ♪ uh-huh, uh-huh ♪ ♪ oh yeah ♪ ♪ tell them ♪ ♪ to grease the wheels ♪
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pull the arrow back start the appeal ♪ i'm not the man ♪ ♪ who sold the world ♪ ♪ i saw exactly what i asked for ♪ ♪ i'm the well-adjusted herb ♪ ♪ a teenage girl just sized me up ♪ ♪ it's something i don't want to discuss ♪ ♪ uh-huh ♪ ♪ what's wrong ♪ ♪ i don't know ♪ ♪ so tell them to grease the wheels ♪ ♪ pull the arrow back ♪ start the appeal ♪ ♪ i'm not the man ♪ ♪ who sold the world ♪ ♪ jesus is dead and so's new york ♪ ♪ i built a place ♪ ♪ right down the shore ♪ ♪ it's nice ♪ ♪ do you remember dfa ♪
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♪ misshapes and oh, the great ♪ longwave ♪ ♪ i do and i miss it ♪ ♪ all the time ♪ ♪ so tell them to grease the wheels ♪ ♪ flip the hourglass ♪ start up the steal ♪ ♪ 'cause i'm not the man ♪ ♪ who sold the world ♪ ♪ we drove forever ♪ ♪ and the venue herbs ♪ ♪ took all our money and all of our merch ♪ ♪ let's make it bleachers ♪ let's make it shore ♪ you know the louder you scream ♪ ♪ the harder he blows ♪ don't you know what i mean! ♪ texas man cause a scene ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪ so tell them to grease the wheels ♪ ♪ pull the arrow back start the appeals ♪ ♪ because i'm not the man ♪ ♪ who sold the world ♪ ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> stephen: you can catch them at madison square garden october 4th. bleachers, everybody! that's it for "the late show." stick around for "after midnight" with taylor good night! [applause]
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