i am craig melvin and this is dateline. there must be a pit in your stomach, when you hear that your inmate is gone. >> yeah. he is a very, very dangerous person. >> you said a prisoner had escaped, and toby was missing. we have shown that he took her prisoner to use as a hostage. >> they were concerned for

toby's safety. >> we found out that she had taken a large sum of cash and two firearms were missing from the house. you think, could she be involved in something like this? >> she had children, a husband, it seemed like it was a white picket fence type life. >> there is absolutely no way toby could be involved in this. >> you see this truck. >> my gut feeling was telling me it was them. >> this is our guy. >> this sounds like one of those fast and furious car chases. >> i was terrified that they were going to get killed. >> so many twists and turns. >> nerve-racking it >> shocking. >> it is unbelievable. hello, and welcome to dateline. when convicted killer, john maynard escaped from prison, authorities feels he would go

to any lengths to evade capture, then a horrifying discovery. prison volunteer, toby young was missing, wife and mother now, the mercy of this desperate man, but was toby in danger? or was she in on the plan. here is andrea canning with breakout. >> it is a cold, february night along this isolated stretch of a tennessee highway, when wes marshall, tony crawford, and dozens of daytrippers finally spotted the woman they have been searching for. >> they were really just trying to see inside of the truck. it was about all i could see of her. >> she was sitting in the passenger seat, terrified. a 48-year-old, beloved mother of truth two. a community volunteer. back in kansas, her tightknit family desperately wanted her home safe. >> we were all fearful of her life.

>> justifiably so. as crawford drove alongside the truck. he knew that if you wanted to get to her, he had to stop him, the man at the wheel. a convicted killer, armed and dangerous, who wasn't going down without a fight. >> he is taking you on a wild ride. >> yes it was. that part was the wildest chase i have ever been in. >> and a fitting climax to a wild, improbable story that blurred the lines between duty and desire. a story about breaking out of prisons, both real and imagined. >> this wasn't just the talk of the town, this was the talk of the nation? >> yes it was. it was just unreal. >> the saga started almost 2 weeks earlier, when the alarm sounded important, david mccue, learned an inmate had escaped from the lansing correctional facility. >> a very scary time, and you know, right away it is like who is gone? who are they? how did they get out?

where are they going? >> sued the warden had a name, john manard, 27 years old, sentenced to life of a carjacking gone bad. >> at the time he committed his crime he was only 17. >> reporter, lauren fox wrote about manard for the kansas city newspaper. >> the carjacking turned fatal. someone shot the driver who was in his car, and so, john manard was a convicted murderer for his involvement in that crime. >> if he is capable of participating in this robbery and murder, he is very capable of murder again, or assault, he is a very dangerous person. >> is your first thought, he could kill some of you out there? >> yeah, very possible. >> he put police in the area on high alert and learned the locals on the kansas missouri border that a criminal was on the loose. >> we had a huge steam whistle and we would blow that several times and so all of the local community all know, you hear

that, somebody is on the run. just an alert, be aware, lock your doors, take all of the precautions. >> as police increase patrols in the surrounding towns, prison investigators got to work trying to figure out how manard escaped. >> right away you start the whole search of all of the interior, all of that, you look for breaches in the fence, you look for breaches in answer or anything like that. >> they also traced every vehicle that left the prison that day and discovered that one vehicle hadn't been searched, a van. >> they searched inside the van, underneath the van, on top of the van. you put seismic sensors on its axles, it will detect the heartbeat of a mouse. there's a mouse inside that vehicle. >> but this time they didn't. >> they didn't do it, they did follow procedures. >> the van belonged to safe harbor, a nationally heralded prison program that taught inmates how to train stray dogs for adoption. that day, several dogs had been picked up from the prison.

john manard, it turned out, was one of safe harbor's.handlers. investigators interrogated every inmate who helped load the dogs into the van. >> they just drilled down and drill down and talk to those folks until you get somebody who is willing to talk to >> where does that would you? >> or that what is that we were very sure that he had left inside of a dog crate. there were other inmates who do that, because he had to get in the dog crate and loaded onto the van. >> there were fewer guards loaded onto the prison on sundays and only two prisoner counts. the weather may have helped manard too. >> today was very cold, they did want to be outside, they were ready to get the dogs in the van and get them out of there. what they did know, of course, is that john was in one of the dog crates. >> and that, investigators believed, instantly put the driver of the van and our's way. the founder of safe harbor, a woman, named toby young, one of

the most popular and trusted volunteers in the prison, and perhaps the reason the guards let their guard down. >> are you thinking toby's like could be in danger? >> absolutely. because we figure he is in for murder in the first place and so, they just had visions of, is he going to get away from here driving way, he pops out of the box and takes her, literally hostage and then, how long before he is done with the hostage? >> it just gives you chills, fear, what could happen? >> toby young set out to help prison inmates, now, she may be the victim of one. coming up. her family desperate. >> people were trying to call her cell phone and there was no answer. we were just fearing for the worst. >> and police on the highest. >> that does gain a considerable amount, he had two firearms and of course, the

question was, is he willing to use them? >> when dateline continues. or square (ethan) i smoked and have had multiple strokes. now, it's hard for me to remember things. my tip is, if you need to remember something, write it down quickly. (announcer) you can quit.

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warden, david mccune was horrified. not only had a dangerous criminal escaped his maximum- security prison, he was possibly holding a hostage, toby young, the leader of the

prison's successful dog training ground, a woman so beloved, the inmates even gave her an endearing nickname, the dog lady. >> she seemed like a model volunteer. >> absolutely, good background, great career, husband is on the fire department, good family. >> now, mccune had to make the terrible news to her family. her brother, todd could barely comprehend it. >> you had to pinch yourself and say, all right, yeah, this is real, this is really happening. >> we are trying to reach out to her? was everyone in the family trying to call her? >> oh yeah, people are trying to call her cell phone and there was no answer and we were just fearing for the worst. >> toby's siblings got together at their parent's place. there were lots of them. toby was the oldest of seven children. was toby someone you looked up to? was she the kind of sister who set an example? >> she was, she did set an

example, she set an example that was very hard for the other kids to reach. >> she let a model life as an adult too. while working full-time, toby graduated summa come loud a with a bachelors degree in minute business and administration and rose through the ranks to become a manager at sprint. but toby was most proud of her two sons, who she raised with her firefighter husband, patrick. they built a life together in this beautiful home. >> she met pat in high school, and they dated freshman, soft or, junior and senior year, and then they married a few years after that. >> this was really the definition of high school sweethearts. they seem like a happy family? >> yes they did. they seemed like the ideal, perfect family. >> toby also had her fair share of hardships, tom said. she struggled to find a job after sprint unexpectedly downsized and laid her off. then, she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. after she recovered and her kids went off to college, toby

took stock. she decided to dictate herself to serving others, by establishing safe harbor. >> do think that is sort of a testament to her personality, that kind of gentle soul? >> exactly. she loves taking care of animals and she loves taking care of people. and the stock program debris release and gave her a reason to carry on. >> didn't give her that extra kick in her step when she had about this calling? >> oh yes, definitely, definitely. gave her a purpose, it seems to complete her. >> but now, on that cold february day, it seemed like toby could lose it all. especially after her husband called law enforcement, with some alarming news. >> during that conversation with her husband, we found out that she had taken a large sum of cash and two firearms were missing from the house. >> ray street stewart, a member of the fugitive tax force theorized that the inmate had driven to her house to get the weapons. if so, he had just turned from dangerous to armed and

dangerous. >> when you throw a firearm into the mix, that's does up the gain a considerable amount, knowing that he had two firearms and of course the question there was is he willing to use them? >> now that john manard had many as well, was to be expendable? her husband feared the worst. >> of course of these types of situations you can never guarantee what is going to happen in the end. i just remember telling him, hopefully everything will turn out all right and hopefully we can bring her back safe. >> they missed a chance to do just that, a few hours after they escape. an off-duty prison employee, who was unaware that manard had escaped saw him at a nearby walmart and wondered what a man sentenced to life was doing in a store. by the time he realized what was going on and call for backup, manard had disappeared . so close. >> are you just consumed by this 24 seven? >> oh yeah. i just -- hanging out there in the office with for the phone on the radio, just listening

for everybody, reports are coming in from the investigators, i just praying, you know, let this be one of the tips that gets us there. >> while department of corrections officers and u.s. marshals were searching for manard and toby, other investigators were trying to find out if anyone outside the prison was helping manard evade capture. so, they interviewed his family and friends, but found no evidence any of them were involved. next, they turned their attention to the prison staff. could one of their own help manard? >> we know it happens, we couldn't even hazard a guess. 30 years, how many staff that we disciplined or let go, because of overly familiar relationships? i mean, it is a number. >> but as far as they could tell, no staff member had helped him escape. and that left one person, whose actions they couldn't yet account for. toby. >> you trusted her? >> yeah.

sure did. >> if you only knew. coming up. investigators take a hard look at toby young. >> i think everything about toby's life up to that point has led people to believe that she was kind of safe and trustworthy. >> then s critical discovery at a storage unit, and the break that will change everything. >> all of these pieces of the puzzle started to come together and were telling a story. >> absolutely. >> when dateline continues. ne - the industry's largest capacity, fastest all-in-one washer and dryer. shop lowe's now for memorial day deals. introducing kardiamobile. with kardiamobile, the fda-cleared smart device, you can take a medical-grade ekg in just 30 seconds from anywhere. every morning i check, make sure i'm in good shape. and it makes me feel pretty good about my heart condition.

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a day into the hunt for john manard, investigators concluded no one close to him and helped him escape . but any investigator worth their salt would check out toby. as unlikely as it seemed, was she somehow involved? >> toby is the kind of person who never broke any law, never broke any rules, she was an ultimate rule follower. >> like a movie is an author and journalist to rock about the prison break for the atlantic magazine. >> i think everything about toby's life up to that point has led people to believe that she was kind of safe and trust for were the. >> but the closer they looked, the more investigators were the astonishing follower was a rule

breaker. shortly after the escape, investigators made several, rather curious discoveries. the prison administrative officer told him that staff had noticed they had been spending a lot of time together. >> hey, you know, they just seem to be a little too close you have got to be very careful about those appearances. >> everything is under the microscope now, including this. in addition to the husband reported missing, toby had entered emptied her retirement account to the tune of $40,000. she also went on a shopping spree to walmart, target and a cabela's sporting goods store. >> so, there is this footage of her at walmart, buying men's closing and snacks that a teenager might want of tweezers and chocolate colored donuts. buying men's closing.

>> more than that, camping and survival gear and maps. he told them the family didn't have any trips planned, he bought close recently. >> the closing she was buying at walmart and cabela's would not have fit her. >> there were other items that clearly weren't for toby's husband. like a hair tie and electric target, to number the phone she bought at walmart. the next day, police got their biggest break yet, toby had rented a storage unit about a unit before her escape. >> they discovered her fan inside a storage unit, they discovered tire tracks leading the way to the storage unit. >> investigators believe those tracks were from the getaway vehicle, an suv or truck. >> finding this really change the investigation in a significant way. >> investigators now wondered, instead of being manard's hostage, could toby be his accomplice?

they found the answer in her cell phone bill. there were calls to an unknown number, they traced it to a phone, they believed toby smuggled into prison for manard. >> this was like the first major line that toby crossed. she brought him the phone and then they talked for something, like 12,000 minutes over the next couple of weeks, something like 200 hours, and they text message all the time. there's one morning, where toby's husband found the phone that she had and received text messages that said something like good morning, i love you. >> investigators added the secret phone calls and texts to a long list of evidence against toby. the demure housewife was looking more like a desperate housewife. >> all of these pieces of a puzzle were telling a story. >> absolutely. >> a story of a forbidden romance. >> right. >> toby is not really the kind of person you are thinking. oh yeah, she is the one that

would have a relationship with an inmate. the married mom, who started the dog program. >> i mean, how much more of a loving, caring person can you have? i don't know. it is almost unfathomable. >> are you feelings of anger? that she did this to you? >> betrayed and-- i'm just misled. a violation of trust. >> but the warden still believed that toby's life could be in danger. >> inmates could be miller. of, and even if her view of it was, we have a very romantic relationship or great future together with this? many, many times it is not reciprocated. >> i mean, toby might have trusted this man, but i know that you sure didn't. >> nope, sure did not. coming up three states

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i am richard lee, with a news update. prosecutors in the classified documents case asked a federal judge to bar donald trump from statement that pose an imminent and foreseeable danger to law enforcement agents. this comes after the former president falsely claimed that standard language in an fbi search warrant amounted to an assassination attempt. and two u.s. citizens with a missionary group in haiti have been attacked by gangs. david lloyd, and his wife natalie were killed in the assault. much of haiti is now overrun by gangs after its government collapsed now back to dateline.

welcome back to dateline. i am craig melvin. killer, john manard, was on the loose. an official suspected prison volunteer, toby young, help them escape. as improbable as it seemed, text messages reveal they were having an affair. but investigators feared manard could be using toby, and she was in danger. now, the race was on and police were about to get a crucial tip. back to andrea canning, with breakout. toby went from a woman. the warden called the family to deliver the news. >> we were shocked, thinking they have to be wrong. this can't be right. >> this is not the toby i know. >> exactly. i just was filled with questions on why she would do

something like this. i have no idea, but i knew that she was my sister, and that i-- that i loved her. >> it is one thing, you know, for her brother to support her, as this is unfolding. it is another thing for her husband, because this is a betrayal. it is looking more and more like a betrayal. >> that was devastated, just like the rest of the young family. absolutely devastated. and i don't blame them. >> what does pat tell their sons? about what mom has done? >> yeah. it was very hard on the sons. it was extremely hard on them. they couldn't understand it. i mean, that was their mom. >> it didn't take long for this intriguing local story. >> mother of two adult boys, a wife of 30 years-- >> blew up in the national news. >> no one close to toby young say they know why toby would suddenly throw away her past and future. >> we had international

attention on this one. it was making the european newscast all over the world, virtually. the killer and the dog lady. >> despite the suspicion that toby had fallen in love with john manard, her family believed that he had manipulated her, that she was the victim. >> she had always been a loving mom. i don't think that they thought she would willingly leave her two adult sons. without telling them where she was going. >> we simply don't have any idea why or how this happened. >> the family decided to hold a press conference. >> we were just trying to plead with her to give herself up. we were feel for for her life to turn herself in. >> but the days ticked by and no one had heard from toby. the national manhunt, involving dozens of agent, had hit an impasse. >> at any point did you start to think you would catch them? >> it didn't certainly cross our mind, but there are very,

very few times across history that they don't eventually get caught it's rare. >> investigators got a promising lead. and led them to a used car dealership on the outskirts of kansas city. the saleswoman remembered a woman who vaguely resembled toby buying a truck around the time of the estate, but her hair color was different, and her name was molly rose. investigators believed that was toby incognito. >> so, we learned she had purchased a used shall be silverado pickup truck. we also received information that she also had the information and wanted it sent to a specific address in tennessee. >> the address was a lakeside cabin in rural tennessee. more than 600 miles away. >> it's a pretty remote location, so not a lot of activity, it was the off-season. and so, we knew there wasn't going to be, probably a lot of people there. so, it is a great place to hide. >> the fugitive task force

blanketed the area, and a s.w.a.t. team headed to the cabin. meanwhile, u.s. marshall, jason blatt, was keeping an eye out for toby and manard. suddenly, he spotted a white silverado. >> you know, it appeared to be driving around there. they were putting their blinkers on in such a fashion that it would hit their brake lights. it was obvious they were lost. my gut feeling was telling me it was them. >> marshall lot followed the truck onto the interstate and call for backup. >> the more units started following the play. not only more units on the ground as far as vehicles, but the middle district of tennessee, these guys, they had helicopters. >> this operation just keeps picking up steam. >> quickly. >> police dash cam video captured the unfolding high- speed chase. crawford assumed the lead position and when everyone was in place drove alongside the truck to get a closer look. >> i was looking at his face, and he had a smirk on his face.

a little funny green on his face, he was looking down at me a little bit. >> he recognized john manard, but was toby with him? and there, riding shotgun, yes, she was. and this is toby. coming up. >> he was walking straight at me, and he stuck out his hand, and he said i want to be your next dog handler. >> an extraordinary conversation. toby young opens up about it all. how things started with john manard. >> this is something i had been craving forever. >> to the moment she realized she might have made a horrifying estate. >> were you scared? >> i thought, i don't know who this person is. >> when dateline continues. speak into the opening so your baby can hear you better. (announcer) you can quit. for free help, call 1-800-quit-now. try killing bugs the worry-free way.

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toby young had been found, sitting alongside an escape, and convicted murderer, in a truck barreling down a tennessee highway. >> justin, this police car sped up from behind us and cut over into us and slammed on their brakes. and john said these-- are trying to kill us. he floored it and we took off. >> as john manard drove even faster with dozens in pursuit, toby wondered what had brought her to this moment away had she made the fateful decision to help you break out of prison? >> when i pulled up that day, i was kind of sick to my stomach

and part of me was excited about what was to happen part of me was wishing that it never had gotten this far. >> it is hard to really imagine even the excited part. i mean you are about to blow up your life. >> yes, but i felt like my life needed to be blown up in some way. it didn't make sense, but i don't think love, very often, makes sense. >> you heard it right. toby says this is a love story. she says she first noticed john manard a year and half earlier, she was walking across the prison yard. >> he was walking straight at me, and he stuck out his hand and he said hi, i am john manard, and i want to be your next dog handler. >> manard soon joined toby's program. nothing happened between them until about a year later, when manard toby's rescue. she was being threatened by an inmate who had cornered her. >> i was terrified, and then i saw john manard kind of

swaggering up you know, from behind this inmate that was accosting me, and i felt this sense of relief, because i thought oh, now here comes somebody that will help. >> toby started spending more time around manard, who was 20 years younger. >> we would have these really deep conversations about, you know, life in the world and this was something i had been craving forever and somebody to just have conversations with. >> and that come around six weeks before the escape, they crossed the line. >> we were just setting up for a dog event and he just leaned over and kissed me. it was like i was on cloud nine. it just made it, like, unquenchable. >> there would be no more kisses after that, but toby had fallen hard for manard. >> when people start falling in love, they change, there's a big smile on their face. with your husband thinking what the heck is going on with toby? >> i do think you noticed a

difference, and he couldn't put his finger on it, and then, at one point he said to me, you know, if i didn't know better, i would think you are having an affair. >> toby said, by that point what had seemed like the perfect marriage was really a dead-end one, and that their relationship had been in a slow decline for 20 years. ever since they tragically lost their daughter, shortly after birth. >> we never really dealt with losing emily, and you know, we just kind of buried it and moved on. and i think when you have something buried that associate vacant, it really is just a wound that doesn't heal. >> despite their growing divide, toby and her husband quietly went about living their one picket fence life. she focused on raising her sons, became an avid soccer mom, and like many women, was the glue that held her family together. but she never felt appreciated. >> i was just invisible,

because i was trying to be a good person, and you know, i knew i was invisible to my husband, and it just felt like everybody knew they could depend on me to do something, so they just quit even regarding the at all. >> then, she lost her job and battled the cancer. by the time her grown kids had moved out of the house, toby says depression set in. >> i would be driving somewhere, and i would think, oh, i could just pull over and into the front of that semitruck, you know, and just done, and i-- i would find myself thinking what-- where did that come from? what is it that you think you need to get away from? >> the answer, she realized, was her marriage. so, when manard suggested toby help him escape so they could be together, she couldn't help but think, what if? >> is a part of you wondering there is a chance that i am being manipulated right now, and i am just a way for them to escape? >> i didn't think that at all. i just thought he was madly in love with and i knew i was

crazy in love with him. and i remember thinking, well, if this escape works, or even if it doesn't work, you know, i'm not going to have to stay in this marriage anymore. >> well, toby, toby, you can get divorce. >> i know. >> you don't need to break an inmate out run away with this person to escape about marriage. >> i do know that. >> so many women, i'm sure, have had that feeling of, i just wants to get away from it all. >> yes. >> what you do realize this is nuts? >> it is crazy, it is totally nuts, but that is the path i chose. >> about a month before d-day, she and manard came up with a plan. manard would lose weight, 25 pounds to be, so he could fit into a cardboard box that could fit into one of toby polsky dog crates. then, toby rented the storage unit, emptied her bank accounts, disguised herself as molly rose, to buy the getaway truck, then silently bid farewell to her old life and to each of her sons. >> i think as a mom that is the

hardest part for me is that-- >> yeah. >> i couldn't say goodbye to my children. >> it was definitely the hardest part and i don't know how i thought that that would work. >> on that sunday, toby nervously drove the safe harbor been to the prison. after the dogs and the dog crate were loaded into the van she drove back out, past the guards, the barbed wire, fearing what would happen next, and hoping a little that it wouldn't. >> and i did say, john, are you in there? and he didn't answer and i thought, thank god, he is not in there. and i will just do a dog adoption and we don't have to do this thing. and then i heard this maniacal life last and i thought, oh crap, he is in there. and i pulled over and i just stopped, and he-- you know, popped his arm out of the box that was in the crate and said drive, toby, drive!

>> they travel that night, mostly on backcountry roads, but then, just 15 minutes from their hideaway, they got lost and toby saw a side of entered that she had never seen before. >> he said, you know, i don't know i brought you along if you can't figure out directions, and he was all upset in math and driving the truck really fast and working >> were you scared? >> i was good at that moment, i was really scared, because i thought i don't know who this person is. >> by the time they arrived at the cabin they had rented, he was back to the charming, caring man she had given up her life for. it was here, for the first time, there were no guards or prison walls to keep them apart. >> so, what is it like finally being able to be with the man you are in love with? >> it was beautiful, and it was wonderful, and it was probably the best part of our relationship. was the intimate part of our relationship. >> that you were finally able to share a bed together? >> yes. you know, i felt so loved, and i felt so treasured and i felt

so worthy, and, you know at that moment, i thought, well, it was all worth it. >> everything you have done, you would say goodbye to your family, your children, your mom and dad, possibly that you could go to prison. >> at that moment it felt like this is why i did it. >> they passed the days playing cards and board games, romantic dinners by candlelight, they made plans to create new identities and start a new life, perhaps in boston. but it wasn't meant to be. they had made a mistake in their plan, a big one. remember, toby had given the whole car dealer her hideaway addressing tennessee. >> this is the definition of almost a dumb criminal. >> that's right. >> no offense. >> it turns out i wasn't a very good criminal, i think. >> and apparently not that good at hiding either. in disguise they snuck into town from time to time to eat at a steakhouse to buy a guitar

for manard, and finally to see a movie and buy a gps at the mall. the same mall, where u.s. marshall, jason lat noticed their truck. >> i noticed there is a police car blocking the entrance ramp to the highway, and i said, wow, there must be some wreck up ahead. and john said, oh, baby, this is for us, this is all for us. >> john manard realizes his freedom is under attack, the question is, how far will he go to fight for it? coming up, a white knuckle ride could turn deadly. >> he cut left but shot across the median and then we all turned and went across the median. >> everything was like slow motion in. i couldn't hear anything. it was this weird, kind of vortex i was in >> and then, what toby has to say now to those she hurt. >> so many people feel betrayed by you. >> when dateline continues. lin before you decide

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welcome back. toby young said she was crazy in love with convict, john manard. together, they escaped to a lakeside cavern, where she said they celebrated with romantic dinners by candlelight, but the honeymoon was over, and now they were hurtling down a dark highway, with police in pursuit. here's andrea canning, with the conclusion of breakout.

>> the chase was on, reality, in the form of dozens of police cars and two helicopters, was in hot pursuit of toby and about to bring her two week odyssey, with john manard, to a sudden and possibly deadly conclusion. >> everything was like slow motion, and i couldn't hear anything. it was this weird, kind of vortex i was in. i couldn't hear anything and there were sirens everywhere, but i looked over at john, he was talking and i couldn't hear him. >> he cut left and he shot across the median. and then we all turned across the median. >> he passed a semi truck on the shoulder, but his wheels went off into the grass, and when he came back he lost control of the truck.

>> that is the truck on dash cam video, swerving off the road. now they were heading toward a tree at 100 miles per hour. >> i was praying the whole time, please, god, just let me die when we had that tree, because i can't deal with all of this. >> but they didn't crash. saplings, planted along the highway slowed their momentum and they glided to a halt. >> john said, i have to get out of the car, baby, or they are going to shoot, and he said, baby, i love you, and he got out of the car and i could hear officers yelling, put up your hands. >> all of your worst fears were being realized? >> yeah. i was a criminal and i was being treated like a criminal. >> and, like a celebrity. her two weeks on the run had made to the infamous. >> was it just love that brought you and john? >> i don't want to talk about that right now. i will at some point, but i don't want to right now. >> john manard got 10 years tacked onto his life sentence.

he has always insisted that he never forced toby to help him escape. >> john didn't like that the more media portrayed him as this manipulating's come back. >> lauren fox received a letter from manard, with his side of the story. >> he said that he loves toby with all that he was commanded he had manipulated her, there would have been no reason for him to stay with her after the escape. >> back at the prison in kansas, warden mccue breathe a sigh of relief, but he still felt betrayed. >> toby left a wake-up just battered emotions. >> that is an excellent way to put it. it was-- do you even understand the depth of the harm and the trauma and the emotional hurt you put on people with this? >> so many people feel betrayed by you. >> yes they do. i mean, i betrayed so many people's trust and love, i let the people down, who cared about the dog program, i let

the people down who worked at the prison, i let my family down. >> did you ever speak with your husband after the arrest? >> i talked to him once, he said i ruined his life and his life was over. >> we reached out to toby's ex- husband, who didn't respond. but he exchanged emails with journalist, michael mooney, and told him he had never taken toby for granted and always supported her. >> i don't think toby's husband thought there was anything wrong with the marriage. i don't think he thought of the relationship as neglect filled or bad in any way. >> toby pleaded guilty to aiding and abetting escape and smuggling a cell phone into prison. she, and her husband divorced the day before she was to start her sentence. the 27 months she spent behind bars were tough. she said she was placed on suicide watch three times. >> i was so broken and so-- i didn't know how i was going to make it through all of this. >> every now and then she got a love letter from manard. >> one of them was like, oh, you know i wish i could ride in on my white horse and rest you

from that prison they are keeping you in, or -- you know? >> but was in the fairytale over at this point? >> yeah. and finally i got to the point where i was like, you know? i am done with this. >> when she got out, toby want desperately to repair the relationship with her two sons, but that proved impossible. her older son kept his distance, and just a year after her release, her youngest son died of cancer. >> you know, when i went to visit him in the hospital, i told him that i always loved him and i never stopped loving him, and he said i know, mom. i know you love me. and i asked him if i could give him a hug and he said no. >> i mean, when you hear a story like that, just, it wasn't worth it. >> no. >> toby says she has written letters to many of the people she heard, asking them to forgive her. not many have responded. but one did. warden, david mccue.

>> hello, dave. >> hi, toby, how are you? >> i'm good, i didn't think i would meet you here again. >> i know. >> toby wanted to apologize in person, so she asked the now former warden if you would need to her, certainly distance because of the pandemic at the place where it all happened. he said yes. >> i want to tell you, you know, that honor is something that is very respected and earned and not given lightly, and i know how much trust you put into me and i betrayed that. and i am so, so sorry about that. >> i appreciate hearing it. and this moment is kind of what brings a little additional humility to put it behind. >> yes. >> it is worth it. i wonder about the other people , because forgiveness is also about contrition. and i hope that in some way it can be made up to them to some degree as well. >> yeah. yeah, i would like that.

>> looking back, you blame john manard for this? >> i don't blame john manard, because if i blame john manard for this , then that would make me a victim, and i am not a victim. >> toby decided to see john manard one last time, hoping that would help her finally come to terms with her mistake . so, 10 years after their whirlwind romance, she sat across from him in a prison visiting room. >> it was really, really good, because it was truly closure, you know? it was just good to be able to sit down and fill in the blanks and then walk away. >> today, toby has remarried, happily this time, she says. and she developed a series of workbooks that she hopes can guide formerly incarcerated women to productive lives after prison. prison.

the key to unlock them. and be free of them. >> what is the lesson for women who feel trapped in a if you ignore the need to make a change until you are desperate, then you make the wrong kind of change. acknowledge you need to change something and then move forward and do it in a healthy way. if he had the-sight and strength to do that 15 years ago, i could have picked a much healthier way to change my life. >> that's all for this edition of dateline. i am craig melvin. thank you for watching. . >> good morning and welcome to the saturday edition of morning joe weekend. let's get to the conversations from the week that you might have missed. we will start with donald trump's criminal trial where testimony in the former president's hush