tv Ekipazh RUSSIA1 January 12, 2024 11:30pm-1:51am MSK
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keep in mind that those who missed the consultation will not be allowed to take the exam, ilya gavrikov, i’m evgenia valunova, maybe she came out again, she’s here, okay. dominov, vlad, me, ignatov, maxim, it’s me, okay, krasnov, vladislav, me, ilyin nikolay, next, these nicrocolzenites bother me, calcenates. i don’t
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it seems to me that in your conservatory they see you much less often than here under our balcony. is mrs. rosalinda at home? no, but she is at the dressmaker's, mr. alfred. that's bad luck, i didn't see her for two whole months. adele, and during this time she at least occasionally thought about me. how many times? and what did she say? every morning it's the same. adelgovo.
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i am being sent to prison, to prison, because of this forester whom you shot? no, razolinda, not because of the forester. for what? for the hazel grouse, although in truth, the point here is not so much about the hazel grouse, but about this old pig, the prosecutor of amedea, on whose lands i hunted. so? you know, he turned out to be the chairman of the anti-poaching society, i offered him any apology, any fine, but he insisted that i sit down, my god, my god, why, why you were just hunting in his domain , it all happened completely by accident, when emma and i got off the train, we headed along the shortest road to the hunting lodge, wait, with which emma, who said, samma, you, why does this surprise you? sorry, heinrich, this more than surprises me, who is emma, dog, dog? where did you
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get it? schultz lent it to me. and schultz's dog's name is emma. emma. what kind of fantasy is it to name a dog after your wife? well, what do you want from schultz? he’s generally a dreamer, you know how he calls his wife kitty, but what’s that amazing? well rosalyn, yes, you amaze me, calling your wife after a cat is not surprising for you, naming a dog after your wife is surprising for you, where is the logic, i don’t understand, okay, that’s not the point, well, here we go with the dog, the shortest route , let’s go, talk, who’s talking to who, well, naturally, i’m with a dog, not a dog. with me, well, here we go, we go, we go, all around is nature, weather, emari zvitsa is like a child, i
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didn’t even notice how we wandered into the territory of this damned prosecutor, suddenly something, emma screams in an inhuman voice, heinrich, shoot, yes, wait, how can this dog scream in an inhuman voice, shoot, heinrich. what do you want her to scream in a human voice: “shoot.” naturally, not human. she screamed : “she has a tail like this, her chest is like this, her paws are like this, there’s a blush on her face, on whose face? on mine, of course, on mine, you can’t even imagine, emma is always such a calm woman, so that means emma , after all." woman? no, i say, emma, she's always like this
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a calm woman can easily handle such a dog, but suddenly she rushes forward like mad. i shoot from one barrel, the hazel grouse falls down, i shoot from the other, i shoot a little lower, the forester curls up, the hazel grouse is silent, the forester screams, everyone comes running. and here i am a poacher, today the court is dismissed, the court returns, everyone gets up, they imprison me, today at 8:00 pm i have a... lawyer, he turned out to be completely incompetent, no, nothing can be done, it’s time to get ready,
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how already? oh, why can't you go? later? the prison probably works around the clock? no, i gave my word to the judge that i’ll be there at exactly 8:00 tonight , my dear, i can’t imagine how you’ll live there, you don’t know what kind of society there might be, a society, some kind of rabble with whom it will be impossible for an intelligent person to talk, lord, let's go, so that during this time they imprison as many decent people as possible, so that you don't get bored there. mr. falk, did you hear that heinrich is being sent to prison? sudarans, i fully share your grief. well, in the end, sit there just a couple of days is not that much. well, first of all, not a couple, but 10. well, 10. well , what can i tell you, well, i haven’t sat at home for so many days in a row. well, heinrich, it’s no one’s fault that you suddenly, for no apparent reason, became
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a hunter. yes, that’s why you didn’t talk him out of it, and also a friend? sudar, i have always spoken out against hunting. well, maybe you ... schultz, he even lent him his dog. schultz doesn't have a dog. henrich just told me that he has a dog. heinrich, what, did you tell me a lie? no, but in general. judgment? do you really think that henry can tell you a lie? ay-yay-yay. i never lie, but if you say that schultz doesn’t have a dog, yes, the agent says that he does, yes, well, that means one of you is definitely telling a lie, madam, i ’ll explain everything to you now, the point is
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that exactly 20 minutes ago, schultz’s dog died , heinrich doesn’t know anything about it, but i know, so he says: there is a dog, and i say: there is no dog, why did she die, heartbreak sir, right on mine eyes, poor hector, i loved him so much. why hector? emma. emma is schultz's wife. no, i know it's my wife. but heinrich told me that the dog, schultz, is also named emma. who said? henry. are you saying
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naturally he shouts emma, emma. so what happens? what happens? the dog thinks that the name is his wife, and does not move, but the wife thinks that the dog is called, and also does not go. can you imagine how her family life began? well, he endured it, he endured it, and decided to rename the dog, and... named it hector, but hector, it's a masculine name, masculine, masculine. masculine, yes, masculine , masculine, well, but as schultz reasoned, as schultz reasoned, if he gives the dog a new
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female name, well, say, alma, then what awaits him in the future, he has a difficult character, his wife may leave him , a dog never , on the other hand, he is a young man and can marry a second time... where is the guarantee that his new wife will not turn out to be an alma too, and where is the guarantee, that’s why he gave the dog a new male name, but the dog obviously doesn’t couldn't stand it and died died hector, being essentially emma, wow, how hot it is here, dear,
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me as your actress, what kind of fantasy? i agree to any conditions, i agree to play the biggest roles for the smallest salary. adele, you're crazy. mr. falk, i have read all the books that the owner has, every morning i imagine that i am someone i imagine, then i’m darina, then i’m juliet, and this morning i wiped the dust like an orlando virgin. adele, you are stupider than i thought, with such manners,
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will give you an excellent opportunity to try your luck. today, the famous russian patron of theatrical art, prince orlovsky, is giving a masquerade ball in his mansion. all theaters. and celebrities will be at this ball, here's your ticket, next, have the success of an actress at prince orlovsky’s ball is an open door to any theater, but for this, dear adele, you must do me a small favor, but do everything. make an impression, open doors to any theater,
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a lot! you know, mr. theater director, it’s all about the dress, or rather the complete absence of it, so, please excuse me, dear prince, but come to you as soon as possible, as you ask me to do. i can’t, although this is exactly what i want most of all, what if i could really show my talent and become an actress, huh?
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unearthly beauty? i don’t know, i and i don’t know, with an arrogant smile, i rise up the stage , inspired by art, i put a vein on my knees, everyone rushes to me, the prince gives me a rose bouquet, i’m part of it as if in a dream, but then the dawn of the bouquet is not there, stealing no, oh! and adele diligently lays down the bor bedspread, although it is exactly like her, but still wipes away the dust of the passer-by, dismantles the old one trash, and doesn’t believe stupid dreams.
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andrei malakhov's holiday show on saturday on rtr. i want to go to college. which institute is this? oh my god! throw it away! tell me, what are your cheat sheets? i need to do it, i really need to, you know? two friends, one believes in fairy tale principle. “i hope my gray will come to me and take me to his home, there are no grays, there are entrepreneurs, the other believes in herself, you are the best girl in this dorm, married, no, then let him marry, i don’t want for him, no i want to be happy, and what do you need for this, all you have to do is become a businessman"?
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great hopes on saturday and sunday at rtr. where are these flowers from? oh, so these are, well, my flowers? yours? yes, these flowers are my wedding gift, what? the fact is that today is the wedding of one of my relatives. and, i wanted ask you, right? “let me go for the whole night, but you said that all your relatives live in the village, except for your grandmother, it seems, who lives in the city, and
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today is my grandmother’s wedding, which is silver, well, excuse me, because she died, yes she died"? but she died just on the day of her silver wedding, and lord, i bought these flowers specifically to put them on the grave, grandma, let me go! so where to the cemetery? have you gone crazy at night in the cemetery, who needs this? grandmothers, of course, don’t need this, but grandfather, what about grandfather, this necessary, god, how he loved her, how he
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loved her, unfortunately, grandfather can only come by night train, and there is no night train back, so we decided to sit on... we’ll cry or pray, and in the morning i’ll see him off and come back go home, let me go, i’m tired of listening to nonsense, nonsense, well, heinrich, get angry, listen, let’s spend this night. together, yes, do you really want to go to prison with me, no, i want you to go with me to a ball masquerade, what a masquerade, for prince orlovsky, and korlovsky,
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you're kidding, falk, another company is waiting for me now, robbers and murderers, your friends aren't going anywhere, yes, but i gave carom, you're tempting me, that means you're refusing, i'm refusing, do you even know what you're refusing, what i'm giving up i refuse , a mansion awaits guests in multi-colored lights, in waves of fairy-tale light
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, carriages float through the park, dazzling white tables await guests, alfarfor, rivers of wine, a luxurious dinner, the sparkle of smiles and pearls, horse-drawn violins and horns, i beg you, wait, have mercy, artists , circus performers, fountains in the garden, lackeys in a fever, champagne on ice , silk, firecracker lights, and someone's breath on your lips, at a masquerade, love, game, don't, don't, let's go, it's time, bewitched, bewitched, persuaded, going to the ball, ah how cruel are
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the pedants, the varistants of the merchants, in this prison there are damp holes, such towers, it’s always dark and scary there, in the basements, it’s like hell, backless. my upbringing, not a life-heavy christ, water and food are available there, they don’t give kulyots at all, the guards beat them with pluses, there’s a carriage waiting at the stairs, i need to change clothes... i need it, there’s only space in the sky for bars in
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window, condules, bells, how scared i am, i turned out to be right, believe me, it wasn’t in vain that i tried so hard, that’s the point, my box, cabriole, defeated you, only true talent turns prose into a fairy tale, the aristant who gave the mask is again a businessman, only genuine talent turns prose into a fairy tale, aristotle wearing a mask. it's the businessman again, i'm running to get dressed,
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in this suit you will go to prince orlovsky's ball, there you will see your master, but he is going to prison, he is not going to prison, we are going to a masquerade ball, there you are you can see him, try to confuse him, charm him, make him lose his head, prove that you are an actress, well, clear. in a word, it is necessary for your master to fall in love with you, oh, clear, clear, go ahead, no, no, sunny mine, i'm going to prison, in
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fraka? yes, and what surprises you? still, i'm going to an unfamiliar place, for the first time, well, of course, when he is imprisoned again, he will put on a jacket and go like one of his own, and you are not happy to get ready, because the prison carriage should come for you at 8:00, right? no, i won't wait for prison advice. henry heisenstein, financier, will go to prison in his own carriage. goodbye, my dear, i don’t know what awaits me in prison, but i will look forward to meeting you. love knows no limits, it is the strongest. love has funny barriers, especially
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for what, for what, oh my god, for what, for what, oh my god, for what, for what, oh my god, for. what, oh my god, for what, for what, oh my god , for what, for what, oh my god, for what, for what, oh my god, for what, oh my god, for what, oh my god, for what, oh my god, what are you crying about, i i’m not crying, what are you crying about, i’m asking you, don’t feel sorry for grandpa. he will come to his grandmother’s grave, but i’m not there, and what’s your grandfather’s name, is it prince orlovsky, and it’s not my fault, it’s all mr. falk, he
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told me that if i want to be an actress, i should go, but this wonderful, one says he is going to prison and going to the ball. "the other one says that she is going to the cemetery and is going there, and i, i, and i, and i will also go to the ball, but i won’t go, no, you will go, do everything as falk told you, yes, bring it the fee is volatile. shi, yes, but i will wear it, and i will also find a dress for you, and my god, alfred, how did you get here, mrs.
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rosalind, i saw your husband leave, i’m here. go away, i have no time for you now, leave immediately, now they should come here, now they should come here, alfred, come here, ah-ah-ah, you are completely wet, let me stay with you, look at your eyes, listen to your voice, take off, take off your coat, go to the dining room. alfred, alfred, here is the robe, you can put it on, not like this, like this, here, go, go to
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fire, here you go, sit down, sit down. so, you need to warm up, drink , please, let me drink to my selfless love for you, don’t talk to me about love, everything is a lie, well, what can i do to make you happy, unfortunately, my dear alfred, you can’t do it you can not. i would like, i would like my husband heinrich to always, always be at home. i wouldn’t be in a hurry, i would sit in this chair in which you are now walking, the watch would be working, the fenik would be fine, that
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’s all, it’s all nothing, nothing to you, but i'm in trouble! our duet didn’t work out without having time to think, yes, you already said, no, i haven’t heard bitterer words, i haven’t heard sadder words, i haven’t had time to meet love, and i say goodbye to it, but let the years fly. quiet without a trace, i will always love you, once and for all, everyone knows
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“frank, director of the municipal prison, madam , yes, what is it, i’m extremely upset that i’m bothering you, but duty is duty, madam, here , excuse me, here’s the order, i have to take your husband to prison, no, is that him? yes , yes, please, come on in, even the pebbles at the bottom understand, they know a lot about wine, i beg your pardon, but you have to go, who are you, are you a bird, a fish or a pebble, i’m the director of the prison, then come on... i’ve never met such a cheerful prisoner, thank you, i like
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you because everyone looks at the world from a humorous side, everyone knows, happiness is life and the alphabet, the one who is loved is the one who loves, the one who loves is sad. mr. aizenstein, it’s time to go to prison, i advise you to dress warmly, to reveal to you a terrible secret, yes, there are no izzensteins here, and do you hear, zalinda, he mistook me for your husband. it seems that i’m at the wrong time, listen, he accepted rosalinda.
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he’s just a joke, he always has a trick in stock, there’s a funny trick, but the joke is just not evil, that’s how my favorite is, my cheerful husband, so my general, heinrich, i’ll just play a prank on you. and even at the hour when it happens without god, as he wants his law of heaven, shatnus will never, and yes now.
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you have a wonderful family, that’s why i decided to respite you until the morning, i give you with all my heart the law is harsh, but still love is stronger than shackles, my god, what... give me an unexpected turn, no, no, my good afternoon, i am in this heat i won’t accept it, i ask without pretense, quickly get him to
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prison, do we have a solid prison? so let him sleep off first, and then by eight o’clock he can appear to me, the shrine of the law is above all, since you serve your husband, take him, with an iron hand, fulfill your duty, otherwise what is the duty in the law, stand up, my dear, follow me, follow me, quickly, follow me, in prison, rich poor old man, sick, they live in peace, as if behind a stone wall , i ask you to come and visit us in prison , have peace, you find such peace there, you find such peace there, that even if you walk there, you are still sitting, but you are caught, piss in
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friends, at the festive palu, praise to the eternal art, bozdagin for the fact that its couples are always recklessly generous, it makes us kinder. and noble and wiser , i sing this song of mine, in his honor i drink my glass to art, joy, the eradication of bitter doubts, the secret of prolonging bright moments, in this pure, in
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this radiant, in this... with christ in gold wine, i drink to the fulfillment of bright dreams, to the fulfillment of your desires. vertse, vertse me, friends, i drink to the pure and gentle ones, i drink to the first snowdrop, i drink to your young bastards, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. i drink to your smiles, i drink to our mistakes, to spring love, yes to spring, yes to
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, please, come on, dear ones, two glasses of cognac, where is she, listen, dear man, and why is your leisko familiar to me, you ’re new here, new, your honor, i became a man the day before yesterday, but that’s why i was a forester, and why did you change your profession so much, out of a sense of self-preservation, a month ago while hunting... hunter, azenshtein shot me instead of a hazel grouse, eisenstein, so i just took him to prison, yes, him they imprisoned me for 10 days, lucky guy
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, what is the point of happiness, well, of course, he will sit for 10 days, and by his grace i cannot sit down even for a minute, 64 pellets were taken out of me and 38. nothing left 36, where did he end up? am i in latin? i forgot what it’s called, well, well, without latin, it’s better not to talk about it, uh-huh, it hurts, no, when i ’m standing, nothing, nothing, but it’s a shame, even the lackeys mock me, they say, there were 14 of us, but now it’s 15 with a fraction, oh pardon,
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at this little finger, this is this man, look without taking your eyes off, turn it to the right, then to the left, to the right, no, don’t turn your head, just with your eyes, so here, here, there, here, come on first there, here, there, very good, i’ll kiss you, this is an exercise, back and forth, back and forth, it’s called shooting with your eyes, and as soon as some little finger, some man comes up to you, i will quietly command you, field and you do as i taught you, oh!
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oh, falk, you haven’t seen a bat, a bat, a woman in a bat costume, she didn’t pass here, didn’t notice, that means she didn’t pass, you can’t help but notice such a woman , my god, falk, if only you saw what kind of clothes she has legs, they can’t get out of my head, they should feel good there, huh? empty and spacious, but for some reason you are very angry today, and you are not sad either, i see how you are aiming at a bat, well , let’s hope that you have better luck with a mouse than with a rower, i wish you success, yes you see, amedai, i see, i see, “now you understand me, how a man has deteriorated over the last 500 years,
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well, how is this possible, and you tell him some historical anecdote, yes, yes, yes, historical anecdotes can be told not only by the royal prosecutor, even by the king himself, the main thing is to take him by the arm, tell him, tell him and walk past us, so there, here, there, there at that moment...
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this is mr. frank, you know him ? yes, who is he, the director of the prison, single, it seems , my god, a man who sees captivity every day, he should be indispensable for family life, what are you worth amedey, he is leaving, he is leaving, i, i will forgive you, he he leaves, hello, mr. prosecutor, greetings, mister. "i hope, you carried out the judge's sentence and took this brawler poacher into custody, yes, yes, of course
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except the following, i i ask, i ask for forgiveness, madam, but i, unfortunately, i am here on business and i do not have myself, i ask for forgiveness, madam, i ask for forgiveness, i ask for forgiveness, i ask for forgiveness, madam, my god , i'm sorry, madam. you have a beauty, be me, i love you, beauty, be my
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wife! “what vile people, these prisoners , you see what a fashion they started, as soon as i was on duty, they are rocking the prison, when you’re sitting, it’s like nothing yet, so...” when she gets up, uh-huh, how they are now pushing her to the left so much they slid, oh, now to the right, how they rocked her, you can’t take a step without holding on to something, oh, they’ll knock her down someday, they’ll definitely knock her down, they
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one awkward turn, in my life i will never forgive myself for this mistake, but well... is this a mistake , here one hunter shot at a hazel grouse, but hit a forester, what a mistake, what can you say about such an idiot, what can you say? do you want from the forester, no, i’m talking about the hunter, or maybe you know him, a certain businessman eisenstein, this is the first time i’ve heard of him, yes, to hell with him, let’s have a drink, mr. frank, your excellency. good evening, yours, let me introduce my friend, marquis de carambol, de carambol, wonderful, marquis, how do you like our masquerade, oh your excellency is wonderful, allow me, yes, adele, wonderful, mr.
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falco. lawyer, lawyer please. mr. duty officer, allow me to report , report, arrested on the twenty-third camera aizenstein aizenstein demands that a lawyer be sent to him immediately, he lives nearby, let me run away, let him wait , don’t fall apart, mr. duty officer, mr. director of the prison may return any minute, director, director, give me, and now move away from me, then move away. still, wait, now pull, who, well, pull with your nose, who, with your nose, well, does it smell like something from me or not, well, it smells, i don’t feel it, mr.
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duty officer, maybe you have a nar sma, no way, no, mr. duty officer, well then come over, damn, only you carefully, slowly, slowly, as soon as you feel it, so carefully, well... that you felt envy yes yes envy you fool, i'm asking you what does it smell like on me, oh how it smells, breathe again well , well, what does it smell like exactly 1 2 3 4 5 6 not 6 and a half means i shouldn’t approach the director closer than 6 and a half steps. why? why? what did you say? one more time
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will i smell what you smell? yes, well, it smells, i say, i’ll fire you, but tell me, how can i say about myself that i’m shacky or no? here, here hu, what do you think? yes, what a drunk man you are, lord, when he is drunk, he wouldn’t, you can’t... it’s a scandal right away, it’s good that there are few of them, now they don’t drink, yes, otherwise it was impossible to live straight, eh , it’s just a pity that we have a mr. prison director who doesn’t drink, yes, it’s a pity, i love you,
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without fear of publicity, we can do without a spare tire, beauties make eyes through the narrow neckline of the mask, so, hurray, this is a disguise, now hold on, the cheat under the mask is life, the mask is life, a game, but the mask, by the way, is a proud woman, it looks like a fool and a fool, we are ashamed of our faces, it’s just not becoming , maskita, let's ask the world forever, let everyone know, it's not a problem, so let's ask our friends! how often does one who is recognized as an authority in everything, on a mask for the sake of life, is saved only by a mask alone, hopeless rogues, buffoons and covetous people, high-ranking
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fools, liars and don juans, shout, hurray, here this is a disguise, how simple and clever it is for us, under the mask life is a game, under the mask life is a game! damascus, by the way, is proud, arrogant and stupid, we are ashamed of our faces, it’s just not becoming, so take off your masks, gentlemen. gentlemen, gentlemen, now, i hope, i will express the general opinion of all our guests and announce that the prize for the best fancy dress
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crumble. somewhere, throw your wife into the deep end, my friend from the outside, why are you embarrassed in the sadness, come on, the overhang, the heart does not want, what an attic, and an attic, let him want to ours, not yours. be ashamed, be ashamed, repent, shed a tear, we forgive, we are in disgrace, we have set our hearts without giving back for.
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and i attended our masquerade. don't repent of it, it's quite nice with you, just before leaving paris, i was at varon rotcherdo’s masquerade, and it was pretty nice there too, and where did you live in paris this year, right? well , where in the past, ah, paris, i can imagine how many baroness fans you had there. more than is necessary , well, if you want to get rid of fans it’s not so difficult, don’t talk with blows, getting rid of fans is as difficult as
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wiping dust on a piano, it immediately accumulates again, it’s not true, i’ve never tried it, marquis, let me present to barones von gre, what an honor i am very glad, marquise carom, how are you, how did you get here? it turns out that you are friends with baronesa? what a baroness, this is my maid. as you said, how dare you, marquis, how can you, marquis, you managed to deserve the first prize.
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poranessa, i can’t live as a dependent person, why do you want to book me, so with marinka, no way, we really need to run away, i love him, why don’t you together, it doesn’t work out together, not together it doesn’t work out either, well, like you ira, it can’t be worse, kulya, run, call soon, only you operate, hear, i beg you, sklifa. continuation, watch on monday on rtr. many of you check your email first thing when you wake up, and i'm certainly no exception.
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n’t tell madam that you saw me here, but don’t tell her that you saw me either, that means you’re deceiving, great, baroness. baronesso, introduce me, madam, meet mr. carom, duchess de hofmannsthal. baroness, get out, get out. baroness, where are you going, go, go, i just remembered that i promised one dance to prince orlovsky? marquis, do you really like
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the baroness? no, duchess, i like a completely different woman. ha, i know her, it ’s up to you to decide whether you know yourself or not? ah... that's it! sorry, marquis! are you married? married, but that doesn't matter. for a long time? you mean how long have i been married, or has it not mattered for a long time? both, married for a long time, for 4 whole years, but it doesn’t matter from the moment i saw you. what a horror, is it really possible that after some 4 years every... book you read, and you know the book you read, someone said that a wife means
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keeping, protecting, intertwining, but reading it is no longer interesting, i’m afraid that many husbands are no longer interested in their husbands, they read this book so inattentively that even they do not know its contents, oh, i know my book by heart. did you really manage to do this? to study your wife well in just 4 years? in 4 years you can learn chinese, not just your wife. my wife sings and dances well, but when i saw you dancing today, i take your hand. her
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skin is not as soft and her fingers are not as long as yours. i know how she can stroke my hair with them. how can she grab your hair, you don’t know? i hope this will occur to her when i lose my hair. i have seen her hands many, many times, i know the shape of every finger, every nail. i know that between the middle index with her finger she has a mole. “oh my god, look , you also have a mole on this same spot, but is it possible to compare her mole with yours, what’s the difference, she just has a small dark spot, that’s all, but for me, for you, for you it’s small a spot can be a guarantee of great happiness if you allow me to kiss him, a source of great disappointment if you refuse me. yes, now i understand why i married him
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, you are all a complete puzzle, but open up stranger, i swear i swear to you that i will not give away your secret, hello your mask, it’s too early for a denouement, i ’ll stay in the mask for now, the battle is raging, he’s not himself, he looks naked. let's feed him first, let's wash him first, i'm in love with you like a boy, as i could before without war, as i fell in love with the mouse, it's important that it doesn't break down, really, insults.
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like cinderella i will have to leave the ballroom at the most inopportune moment. what's wrong with you? with me, nothing, but it seemed to me that you were in a hurry somewhere, i, yes, on the contrary, yes, i’m in a hurry, i’m in a mad hurry to agree with you about our further meeting, and you are sure that it will take place, and you are sure that it will not, time will tell, time, pitiful time, how can she understand how in love i am with you from the very first minute, give me here, “how lovely, i’m taking them as a souvenir, and i’ll give them away at our next meeting, but aren’t you sure that it will take place, don’t see me off, and don’t follow me, wait, wait, but how
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if they were stagnant, damn champagne, how was the night, duty officer, are you deaf? i’m asking how the night went, allow me to report, mr. director, and those arrested almost dumped the prison in the morning, are you drunk, no way, mr. director, completely sober, sober, and you’re talking some kind of nonsense, how can you get out prison? why not
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oh, the deputy got in touch with him, we’ll give him a shout, and who are you, gentlemen? i came to sit down, but please, everyone is sitting here, but where is mr. director? and he is in a bath with a mixer. and who are you? i, frog, am on duty. yes. oh, excuse me, who are you? gentlemen? excuse me, sir, why are you addressing me in the plural? i'm alone. one yes, but what exactly do you want, my last name is azenstein, i came
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to go to prison, so you say one, there are two of you, here you go, please, here you go, please, here, consider it, cell number 23, huh. .. eisenstein, heinrich, no, heinrich eisenstein is me, and i haven’t been imprisoned anywhere yet, no, no. they imprisoned you, they imprisoned you, well, yesterday, exactly 15 o’clock at night, mr. director, i personally went to pick you up home, home, yes, to me, yes, here you go, here, here, on green street, house number 13, do you want to say that last night
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you found house 13 on green street? mr. azenshtei, that’s right, and mr. azenshtein was about to go to bed, they forced him there in a strong robe, and well, ms. aisenshtein, she was also getting ready to go to bed, i think i’m going crazy, lead me. i’m going to see him right away, do you have permission? no, then you'll have to contact the prosecutor's office. fuck it, oh fuck it, i gotta see this scoundrel now now, mr. duty officer, let me continue, report, may the lawyer whom i invited for the twenty-third cell come in, let him come in, let him in.
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who was imprisoned, in vain, in vain, treat yourself so strictly, it is sad that you were imprisoned, but people were higher than you, you see, socrates, galileo, count montecristu , everyone was sitting, don’t be upset, you know , we lost the trial, but we didn’t lose our honor, that is, how did we not lose it, i lost everything, honor, name, surname, wife, cell, being at the moment , there’s nowhere to even sit, you lost a trial that any boy could win, you have no right to wear this robe, god, what a thought, take off the robe right now and give it to me, manty, yes, take it off, or i’ll strangle you,
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my god, he shook himself, well... will you take it off or no, listen to me , i beg you, i was in a hurry, i’m straight from the postil , i have almost nothing under my robe except me, i can’t make it clear, it means you prefer to be strangled, for god’s sake, well, count to three, one, two , well , what about the scores between yourselves, take the glasses, the wig, and now there you go. but how can i , in fact, i’m not responsible for myself , i left, now i find out everything, here, here, misterstein, the lawyer you sent for, how glad i am, mr. defender, i ’ve been waiting for you with such impatience, oh my god , give me
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the strength not to use force, what do i have with whom? honor, sit down, you see, i must admit that i am not aisenstein at all, but why did you call yourself aisenstein? you see , during the arrest, i was with the wife of this same aisenstein. why did you jump up? i have such a way of working, an amazing way, sit down. so, you say that yesterday evening this respected gentleman was married, who is this, dear gentleman, husband? yes. since you are my protector, you should not say about your husband that he is a respected gentleman, on the contrary, you should confuse him, which is what you are telling me, you really
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they came to protect me, calm, the main thing is calm, yes, i came to protect, so why then do you refuse to confuse your husband , okay, i’ll make you laugh. in order to make me attractive, you must prove to the jury that the wife is an angel and the husband is a pig, but no, you better write it down, otherwise you will forget, no, i will remember, well, at what time you came to her, around 8, you found her alone, completely. so what, what did you start doing next, drink, what to drink, takayskaya, well
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, you drank it, then what, you started drinking port, you know, it’s not bad either, but then, later. and then the director of the prison unexpectedly appeared, mrs. razalina was so confused that i had to become her husband, my god, my god, what could i do, it was a late hour, an intimate setting, suddenly strangers came in. in order not to compromise a woman, the only way out is to deceive her and become her husband, so i became her, and you kissed her? i didn’t, but she did you, and
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so well, linda, i forgive you, but i warn you that from this moment a completely new one begins for you life, strict control on my part and complete obedience on yours, well, okay, but if my life starts from this minute, then i would really like to know what? what time is it please, i don’t have a watch, where is it, i sent it in for repairs, and what happened to it, they started lying. yes, yes, but it seems to me that they
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are going absolutely right, someone else is lying. my god, where did you get them from? oh, i received them as a gift. i'm destroyed. roselinda, forgive me, forgive me! “no, i’m sorry , i’m sorry, okay, okay, okay, i forgive you, but i warn you that from this moment a completely new life begins for you, strict control on my part, i agree, and complete obedience on yours, do whatever you want with me, and you dared to say that her hands are more beautiful than mine, rosalina, an eclipse came over me, that i was read..."
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book, my god, what an idiot i am, only now i realized that i missed the most interesting pages in this book, how many people, how many people? is this really all for us? yes, where am i going to put them all? what is it? why are you here? what happened? my servant saw you at the ball and decided that you, the marquis de caramboli, are the same criminal who put a good charge into it. ring all this
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misunderstanding, how could you really think that i’m like the director of the prison, frank, what’s the matter, i heard everything, gentlemen, it’s a misunderstanding, believe me, a complete misunderstanding, gentlemen, the culprit of the crime is sitting in a cell in my prison and will serve time in due time, believe me, please forgive me, heinrich, introduce me, bats. gentlemen, let me introduce my wife. marquis, you are deceiving us, this lady cannot be your wife, because you have been courting her all night. my husband is courting only for his wife. i considered myself
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the number one person in vienna when it came to practical jokes, but you surpassed me. well, that's not all. baroness. baroness, i hope you will join our cavalcade. and i'm not a baroness. not the baroness? are you joking? i'm an actress. actress. what theater are you from? from mine, i’ve never seen such an actress here, she’s new, tomorrow i ’ll pick her up, no, no, no, no , no, no, no, no, today, like, yes, yes, today, never i couldn’t imagine that you were an actress, and you still doubt it, huh?
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a merchant grows greens, cabbage , potatoes, carrots, come here, old man, buy a bunch of radishes, soup without parsley is like water, housewives, housewives, come here, madam, i ’ll give you some pepper, and you’re a soldier, so good that all goods, take them for a penny, take them for nothing, soldiers, tomatoes, lettuce, sweet belipenya, and horseradish and ritskohia,
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i urgently need to see the arrested azenstein. and what happened? mr. esenstein, congratulations. allow me, please, gentlemen. i don’t understand anything, i have the impression that i’ve gone a little crazy, why do you call him eisenstein, because he’s eisenstein, well , thank god, after all, it’s not me, but you, who’ve gone crazy, because he is not eisenstein at all, but he marquis carmbol, i really don’t want to upset you, but still you are the crazy one, because this is not a marquis, but eisenstein, yes, gentlemen, i am eisenstein, wait, gentlemen.
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please, would you like to sit down? no, thank you, i’d rather stand, gentlemen present. are there any hunters among you? yes, i, for example, mr. hunter, can you tell me how many pellets are in one cartridge of the fitting? 50, in two 100. so, how much do you have, please? here 64. and... there 36 - 64 and 36, which means 100, therefore, neither
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everything was resolved fortunately, everything was by common agreement, the intrigues were over. and the marriage chains are tight for the don juan, from now on he leads himself exemplary and devotedly and faithfully, in love with his wife, in love with his wife, without wasting unnecessary words, let us repeat to each other, love is at peace, we repeat to many, it is not beautiful.
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