broke, laid the tiles, i only have two questions: why are the tiles black, why is there an inscription on it, we remember we mourn, i understand that you saved, but not to the same extent, 3,000 for a new swing, yeah, i already paid 2,500 for the old ones, where you just took them, i was rocking the child, the seat came off, the child flew into the open balcony on the third floor, i got up, the door was opened by a neighbor, and he himself has three children, i say, i’m sorry, but one of your children is mine, the neighbor’s eyes hatched, says: i have long had suspicions about wives, i say: your wife has nothing to do with this, it ’s all because of the swing, we were swinging and accidentally fell into the air. and most importantly, i also paid

2,500 for this, neighbor, so you still want money? this is the most offensive thing, you seem to pay for quality, but they slip you some kind of junk. neighbor, should i return your money? i say, god bless them with the money, you give back my baby , tell your wife when he goes out. don’t let him go to the playground, it’s dangerous there, you can get so caught up that it won’t seem like much, i didn’t have time to finish, because of your broken swing, i got a broken jaw, so 8,000 for repairing the roof, oh, you repaired it, we live on the top floor, it was raining with a hurricane, a piece of the roof moved off, everything leaked

so much that i flooded the neighbors below, i came to the management company, i say : sorry, i killed the neighbors, what are we going to do? they got scared and said: why did you do this? i say: what do you want, my roof has moved off, i have soaked everyone five floors down, if you want, i’ll show you, there’s a wet spot left, i want you to solve the problem with my roof, otherwise, next time i’ll soak up the entire entrance, i thought they’d fix everything, but these idiots called a mental hospital, 5.00 for the hood in the kitchen, here i’m happy, at least they did something properly, when my mother-in-law... started frying pancakes

and turned it on the hood, it was sucked into the chimney, it stayed in it all night, i took it out of there, in the morning the neighbors said: your dog howled all night, you tormented it, or what? i say: this is not a dog, this is my mother-in-law, imagine, i spent the whole night trying to get her out, grabbing her by the legs, trying to pull her out, but she sticks out and doesn’t drag, it’s good that my wife saw... since then, my mother-in-law hasn’t been back to us, so thank you very much for the hood, 3,000 for cleaning the territory, for what kind of cleaning years?

the poplar and fluff were not removed for a week, i wrote to the house chat, remove the poplar and fluff, i have allergies, and you sent a message: dear residents, the fluff is beautiful, may the land rest in peace, 1500 security, yeah, i saw this security , an old concierge, 80 years old, only lets in residents, drives the rest away. one day we were expecting tesya to visit. it was raining. the concierge stood at the entrance in a black cloak with a hood head when the father-in-law approached, she extended a clumsy finger and said: “you are a non-resident! we pumped out the test for a week. 12 thousand sound insulation. yeah, now. a family

of star workers lives in the next apartment, and recently a guest came to them, only one, one village, such sound insulation , that everything is heard, i learned the language in a month . and that’s what i want you, dear management company, to say, i have no conscience. i have no more strength, they write, please pay everything by the thirtyth day. the month is not specified, dear management company, i i promise you that i will give you the entire amount i’ll definitely pay, february 30-31, wait, thank you!

the number that you will now see, you will also really like it very much, because, as they say, it’s hot and dedicated to the symbol of the new year, and what is the symbol of the year, right, dragon, i’m a dragon to you, i’m happy to fly, ask for the code dragon, i want one thing, further, further and further, don’t be discouraged, further on everyone , let us meet, let each other smile, so that every

meeting has more fun and easier for us, give it, give it to me, i’m the dragon and you are regina . you and i are on day, you can irritate a new one just like me, and if the two of us binge on this, the whole earth will be joyful, from such la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la -la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la. la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la,

dragon, we really liked you, yes, and we are leaving you in our cheerful company for the whole year, yes! the new year's dragon was presented by artist nikolai zykov la-la-la-la-la- la la-la-la-la-la-la igor momenkolya igor momenko igor igorek. you won’t get away with singing la-la-la, you promised me that today you will delight the audience with funny stories about the new year. friends, are you ready to laugh and applaud, and great, the scene with the monologue

new year igor momenko, once celebrated the new year, well, we sat down. to hold the table in the old year, we sat down, as expected, early, in november, but the holiday developed sluggishly, we drank a glass of vodka, washed it down with juice, then repeated, no prospects, stagnation, we decided on the contrary, vodka, a glass, juice, a qualitative breakthrough, is it a joke, within half an hour an ambulance, a fire department and the cops arrived at once, the cops stood up for firefighters, because we robbers wanted

to take alcohol from the doctors, but we took it away , the women danced so hard that their heels began to come out of the ceiling of the neighbors below. we realized where the varillian had gone after the cat sang to murka, playing along with herself on the guitar. then angela came up to us and asked us to take the pies to her grandmother, who lives here not far from the forest, and we went, not knowing that the grandmother was from angela, we only bring warm greetings , we forgot the pies in the kitchen, we went into the forest, seryoga walked behind, for some reason all the time i spat and swore, i walked in front, bending and letting go of the spruce branches. "we walked south,

not that we exactly went south, we certainly went in other directions, but we walked south more often, in short, if a tracker had followed us, he would have shot himself to keep the direction, we walked exactly a pine tree, a pine forest - this is the best landmark, i wanted to eat it, i knew it was a squirrel." hide nuts, we dropped off a squirrel, laid it under a pine tree for 12 hours, all 12 hours the squirrel sat on a tree and brazenly knitted socks, we moved on, began to sober up, desire the amount of food to eat did not decrease, seryoga managed to knock down a chipmunk with a spit in the eye, the next day i smelled the smell of a wild boar, for 3 hours we stubbornly followed the smell, sweat, which was constantly intensifying,

then he decided to go first, overtook seryoga, the smell immediately disappeared, in the afternoon of january 5th on us a pack of wolves came out, both sides showed each other a keen gastronomic interest, since there were two of us, about 15 wolves, then one of the sides... was in a hurry to give in, serego and i ran 20 kilometers, but we could not catch up with the wolves. the next day in search food, we fell into the bear's den, the bear was sleeping, when he moved, we, as if on command, began to sing him a lullaby, we sang out of tune. opened my eyes, there were two orthodox christians in berloga, but

the bear was the first to cross himself, by the new old year, ragged and angry, we nevertheless went out onto the federal highway, immediately ended up in the police for an attack on a bread truck, as my grandfather said, if you drink a glass, there will be good appetite, if you drink a glass... you will be in a good mood, if you drink a bottle, there will be a celebration of the soul, and if you drink a liter, you will have everything at once, appetite, mood and celebration of the soul, but you won’t remember this, people, drink in moderation. old new year, friends, our new year's party

continues, and you know, as people say, the world is not interesting without songs, therefore, friends, now there will be a song, it will be performed by a singer who has a lot of fans, so you can start applauding the stage, folk russian artist, alexander buinov, and the scarlet ballet. your destiny is not an evil pitmul, if you’re alive, go dance, today you grabbed the steering wheel, follow her,

let’s dance when it’s not clear what’s what, have time to be sad and don’t dance, dance like petya, petya loves to live in the world, lyosha loves to be good, jenya, jenya loves to be in motion, kokolya, coca-kola, it’s better to dance. vamos levar, vamos levar, vamos levar, vamos levar, meu para para.

dance like petya. dance like lesha. lyosha. dance like a wife. and dance like kolya. dance

like petya. petya loves to live in the world. adzui like lyosha, lyosha loves to be good, adzui like zhenya, zhenya loves to be a movement on the sound of kolya, kolya is the best in the world, boklya fuklyaf, boklya fa, bomb, bomb!

i can’t live with an addicted person, what are you talking about? do you want to leave me? what about marinka? no way, we really need to figure it out, i love him, why aren’t you together, it doesn’t work out together, not together doesn’t work out either, well, like you , it can’t get any worse, kolya, run, call me soon, just operate, hear, i beg you, sklipa, continuation, look at rtr on monday. in the far north-west of russia, above the arctic circle, lies a true treasure trove of nature, the kola peninsula. sometimes it is called russian lapland. the nature on

kola is surprisingly diverse. this and taiga. and the tundra mountain ranges, where countless herds of reindeer roam. in the north, the kola peninsula is washed by the barintsevo sea, warmed by the warm atlantic current; it does not freeze all year round. in the east and south, the peninsula is separated from the mainland by the ice-bound white sea. some scientists believe that the northern cradle of humanity, the legendary hyperborea, was located right here, on the kola peninsula, from the first note, beauty, repeats, from the first phrase, a bird in your hands is better

than a feather in one place, you swim shallowly, with first ul. we recognize each of them, front, profile, back of the head, belov, or something, we ’ve been together since first grade, we’re also responsible for everything we do together, and in all this crap, i’ve got your back, team, pull out of the car, run, the whole brigade. just look at the platform, the light is spinning

, the table is flying, friends, i never tire of repeating that you are simply record holders in terms of applause and laughter, i have only one question: if

our concert lasted 100 years, would you be tired of laughing or not, then go ahead stage with the premiere number, always very funny and unexpected, elena sparrow! oh! oh, my good ones, my golden girls, girls, women, yes, my little ones, times are crazy these days, everyone is running somewhere, everyone is in a hurry somewhere, everyone is calling someone, and reporting to someone, reporting, reporting , oh, but i have no one. somewhere my controller is roaming free, capable of pulling my audit, where are you, where are you men, men,

men, men, well, where are you, no, devsit, dismantled, dismantled, and what remains is not what remains, not there, and not with those, i’m angna, no, there are hundreds of us, there are thousands of us, there are millions of us lonely, strong, stylish, fantastic, fascinating, unread, half-read, unopened books , fire in the eyes, mystery on the lips, perspective in the hands , come, take, read, read me at will, not

me, the woman, me, the big one russian encyclopedia, take it, take my knowledge, cling to the buoys, and row, row, row into the ocean of life, row, row with me with swimming instructions , don’t be afraid, i’m next to you, you’ll swim out with me, yes you’ll screw up, maybe you’ll screw up along the way, but you'll swim out, row, row, row, i say, little pot-bellied little thing, i'm telling you, that's who now winked, but risky, do you have an extra eye, no, but what about mine then? i say, signal, but for the mood, whoever needs it, for fun, i’ve seen such russian fun, and

if you want, i’ll teach you how to light it properly, and take the instructions and start, like a chinese garland, brightly, but not for long, why not, already you read it, but you still can’t say it. what i stopped at, but not those men these days, yes, yes, yes, yes, but there are a lot of us, as they say, the library is big, but there is no one to read, now the trend is speed reading, speed reading, a man gets stuck somewhere on cover stage, everything, everything, everything. but it’s weak to flip through and look at the contents, and we rush, like drags, to the splits, where, without hitting,

we rush to...

glad to see you, again with a new one, and this is also with you, you read two books at the same time, let me god of health, all hope is in you, bibliophile , you are ours, you should already be included in the red book, and oh, excuse me, girls, what am i talking about... but between us, speaking, if we, girls, are found in tons of waste paper , brush off the dust with a pipedaster in some places, lightly photoshop the facade, then we are still very very we can even try to return this honorary title of the most reading country to the country. read,

read, read to your heart's content, read to the gills, don't stop the process, everything to the library. well, for you, readers, ours, oh, don’t let us down in the new year, friends, they say that the best gift is money, because no one...

will say that he already has one, and he doesn’t need one, so i believe that the best gift for the old new year is a new funny number, and today natalya karosteleva and yuri khvostov will present such a gift to the sold-out audience. balad about love. let's imagine that we are at the tables of a cozy cafe. dear guests! today we gathered in this cafe to celebrate the silver wedding with my precious wife, larisai gennadievna, for 25 years we lived with happiness and joy, soul to soul, she gave me three, three beautiful children, so kostenka is filming us , we’ll watch later, yes, kostya, only you’re okay, and not like

last time... this is when your camera fell into the aspic, we then sat down to watch and there were only these meat to the bone at 6-6 o’clock, and you, my dear larisochka, today i want to make a surprise, i want to dedicate a song of my own composition, a ballad about love , oh, my beloved swallow,

danizha, can’t you see, stupid , i will lay all my love, immense, at your feet. keep the map close, can’t you see, the course is blind, i started a song for you, how much i love you, you’re a crooked toad, you can’t do it, hold it, listen to me, listen to this ballad, ballad, you’re a fool, you’re a fool yourself, smile people, look how much i love you. your eyes are blue, are you a dumbass, i’m having curry, what are you generally a ram, you've been living with a woman for 25 years , you can't understand what color my karyas are, you saw, it's not a blue darif, i admire you goddess, oh, karyas, this is a feathered goat, damn,

brown, how does it rhyme with me? take the brown ones, lord, as you know i can rhyme with the brown ones, come up with it on the fly, come on, how i love your eyes, brown ones, how i want you , hug, how i admire your hariya, give back the blue one, yes you gored, it’s blue takari, 25 i’ve been living with you for years, but as soon as i get my brains everything is already mutaten, i don’t have any to keep, i don’t i’m standing there now, the carousel of love has spun us, our nights of passion are... no need to fill it up, our nights are full of specks, you have passion like february 29th, every 4 years, that’s bullshit, you’re a dumb-headed sheep, i’m dumb-headed, yes , and you’re smart, you fucking

made your mother’s heated floors, when you turned it on , all her slippers melted, she walks around the house like that, otherwise she’s always cheerful and hot , i saw that, by the way, where’s our mother sitting, here where are you, as always, in the corner quietly eavesdropping, yes, yeah, that, and that mom doesn’t have anything on the table, bring mom something to eat, yes, i ordered her a special dish, bring mom her dish, and what did you order for her, for the dish, three pickled cucumbers, bring mom something hot, heat up the yoghurts, eat, mom, do you understand, snake, how much you love me? do you remember how fate married us , i took you away in a warm clothes, you don’t need to call the land of the earth gilenzhi, you rented a room, the toilet

is on the streets, 4 hours to the sea through the great caucasus ridge, eight people in one room, they slept like pencils in kicks each other, i still don't... from anyone our kostya, what am i saying, kostya is filming , sing, let’s be fine, you hold it as normal as i can, hold it, smiling, people look, he ’s fine, he’s like that, together we went through difficult years, but we were always there my faithful friends, the wise, so who are the wise?

“i don’t like roses, i’m such a brute, you don’t understand this, i love lilacs, it’s hard

to remember this after 25 years, that i need to give lilacs, i’ll take lilacs, on march 8 there are no lilacs yet, in the winter it’s a wedding day, there are no lilacs at all, go, where can i get you some lilacs? yes, i put myself on a lot of things because

it’s cold at home, you’re with your friends , your wise ones, how you built it, the stove is on the street, the pipe leads into the house, i asked you to get married, i said, you’ll live like a queen, and i’ve only been big once in my whole life i tried it. and then the frog one, when i was swimming in the pond, well, i’ll buy you a bucket of roof, if you want, i’ll give you everything , i’ll change the stove for you, i knew that you were such a sweetheart, you’ll spoil everything for me, this whole bouquet, i’ll second you i took a spare one, look now i’ll soak the second one for you, you’re my white swan, and you’re the best man,

i’ll attach the doors to the car, we’ll go to gelelendzhi, by the way, if we stay in the same room, they’ll give us a discount, i agreed, morik is there. like my eyes are blue, the three of us will be happy, but why the three of us? well, because my dear, we ’re taking mom with us, listen, you were joking about mowing, what? not my son, well, look at how he’s filming

, he’s pointing the camera at himself, he’s filming himself, he’s just as stupid as you, mine, just mine, my little darling, honey, swallows, mom, why are you sitting there , get ready, let’s go, the cucumbers are already here, let’s go we'll eat some giles for you, friends, we started our new year's song performance, we'll end it with a song. yuri galsov, please stage! the path to the beginning is not easy, time beats so fast, past the moons, past the stars, our ark floats. if you move

the arrows back, it will happen again, either the sun in your eyes, or snow on your eyelashes. the new year is coming to us, through snowstorms and separations, but when... it will come, this new year, this new year, but a new year, again. mme again a guest on the threshold, in this

ancient game, we are all children and gods, this fairy tale is old, the night lights shine, it didn’t happen yesterday means tomorrow will happen, the new year is coming to us. eighties and separation, but when he comes this but. new year, there are seven wonders in the world, and the eighth, the wonder of the world, is your arrival, new year, old, new year, new year. we

are going through snowstorms and separations, but when it comes, this new year, old, new year, new year. old new year, my dears, well, our

new year's meeting has come to the end, all the artists once again congratulate you on the old new year and wish you health and happiness! and, of course, have a great mood if you will smile, you will have friends, and if you frown, you will have frowns. all the best and see you again on air.

but the new year is coming, happy new year, with new happiness, time rushes us forward, the second year is no longer in power, let everything around sing, and smiles on faces, because that’s what the new year is for, to sing and have fun, the new year is coming , happy new year, happy new year, happy new year, happy new happiness. happy new year, happy new happiness, happy new year, dear friends, at these moments, together with the whole country , we are celebrating the new year 2024, and we sincerely wish

all joy, prosperity, goodness and, of course, peace. following a wonderful tradition, we invite you to the festive new year's light, a light of joy and hope that has warmed the hearts of viewers for more than 60 years. friends, let's celebrate the new year in the company of our favorite artists, to the sounds of our favorite songs. may the festive mood remain with you throughout the year. in our country, the new year is celebrated almost the whole day. until he gets from east to west to... at the festive new year's light, people's artist of russia nikolai rastorguev, the lyube group and the state russian folk choir named after pyatnitsky are singing along throughout the country.

where i am on the way the night pockets are filled. the girls walk in a crowd, and smile at the sweet ones , such a wonderful night, next to you,

a russian, dreamy song flows like a river, from the volga to the yenisei, with feet still kilometers away, russia, my russia. from the volga and the yenisei, from the volga and the yenisei! nagas are nothing for kilometers. russya, my russya! from the volga to the enessey! yea! rasseya! yea! germanite! the young man tries with all his heart, over the river wave, plays great, my side,

dear, russia, crowned, ringing song, crazy, crowned with sadness, from the volga to the yenisei, with feet. russeya, my russeya, from the volga neseya, from the volga to the yenisei, the naked beasts are kilometers, russeya, may russeya, from the volga and the yenisei, russeya. from the volga to the enese, forests and steppes, rasey, may you

rasey, from the volga and beyond sowing. thanks to grandfather frost for our happy new year's childhood,

the most popular winter song will now be played especially for him. and it will be performed by the main magician of good mood, nikolai baskov. it was winter in the hut, she salted snowballs , she twisted yarn on a birch tree, she wove canvas, forged ice, and there were bridges over the rivers, an icy ceiling. now creaking behind the rough wall, the darkness is prickly, as if you step

over the threshold, the whole duin, and from the windows the threshold is blue, the ceiling is flying, the door is creaking , behind the wall is joked, the zma is prickly, as the tarn burns in the threshold everywhere, the rings from the threshold are blue-blue. she went hunting, crushed silver, planted a thin moon, a crystal bucket, sewed fur coats for the trees, prepared a sleigh ride, and then hurried into the forest, so that in the hut relax. the entire ceiling was icy, the door was riveted, the wall was wide, darkness. prickly

so you step behind the rocks from one and from the windows there is a rock blue-blue ceiling icy door creaking behind the iron wall prickly zma as you go over the threshold suduini and from the windows the enemy is blue-blue!

in the midnight sky, in the spring sky, two stars were falling, the stars were falling with a soft glow, in the morning santa, this harsh holiday of the fall, turned their heads, only to return

to the sky again. there was no more strength, two stars, two bright stories, in their love, how cheerful i am, two voices among the silence , in the heavenly temple, the stars... a task, but to failure, the stars are not birds, they are not given wings, in the high sky they will be born again, the stars are not destined, the stars burn out, do not reach the shores of the earth as the golden candles melt.

stars and their songs, without a star, without bright stories, in their love, like in the sky of salinity, in voices among silence, in the heavenly temple, everything.

without a star, without bright stories, in your love, as if in joylessness, two voices among the silence, in the heavenly temple, those stars. dear friends, with all my heart i wish you

well-being, a world of happiness, and what does a person do when he is happy? but we have known this song for a long time, and women are so simply in love with it to tears, yes, but in the new twenty-fourth year this song will be performed for the first time, then it is worth adding that it will be performed in a new performance, at the piano by the author, composer, people's artist of russia igor cool, on stage, people's artist of russia grigory leps, i love you to tears. raise your eyes to the christmas sky, wish

for everything you dream about in life before you, i i haven’t been so happy, one thing for you. oh, you love them so much, these white flowers, i love you to tears, every breath is like the first time, instead of already beautiful phrases, it’s a tax. thunderstorms, petals of white thunderstorms, i will freeze our bed, i

love you to tears, i love you madly. your front, on your soft white skin, the beauty of your divine hair, i admire and value most of all. everything with you has just begun, i love you to tears, i love you to tears, every breath is like the first time,

a place of beautiful phrases. this cloud is growing with swooshes of white roses, i will kiss our bed, i love you, i love you madly.