well, something like that, memories, nostalgia, but my uncle explained it to me, he says: “hey, nephew, i wear furashki all the time,” everyone thinks that i have sweatshirts, you know, i don’t take them off anywhere, you know, there's a lot of hair there, so the guy took it on his bald spot and tattooed it - a man's face, it turned out with a beard, this hair, well, they gave him a mirror to look at, he looked like that, he says, but i don't care, but he doesn't care drum, but he lives among people, and it was in st. petersburg, so he one day... was waiting for his wife after work, and st. petersburg courtyards, they are so, you know, they are so dark, they are well-like courtyards, echoing, i lived in st. petersburg for a long time, you know, there you shout in the yard, yes, the echo comes back, it happens on the second day, and it’s not yours, so and he’s standing in the gateway, waiting for his wife, a guy comes up behind him, he’s such a homeless guy, he says, listen, brother, let’s buy him a cigarette and let’s chat a little, you know, it’s a little boring alone at night, and...

one guy is lying there, he says, he’ll take off his swimming trunks now, he’s tired everywhere signed, but you work where the heart is, it’s tired of loving, you also know, women in terms of tattoos, they’re all equally in first place, i heard two friends talking in the gym, well , i just go to the gym, it’s fashionable now, i swing, don’t you really react correctly on the swing? when i undress, even the trainers

laugh, well, now it’s not about me, i hear one friend, the other for the whole hall, say: lyutochka, i didn’t understand something, it seemed like you had such a cute snake on your neck, something doesn’t seem right now i see, or i'm confusing something, correct me if i'm wrong, people, there was a snake of ours, come here, what are you yelling at the whole hall, what are you yelling at the whole hall, you're attracting me, i came up and asked if there was a snake or not, i came up and asked if there was a snake, no, there was, there was, but where is it now? “i had a facelift, now it’s living behind my ear, friends, think about getting a tattoo, remember our conversation today, maybe you shouldn’t rush yet, although, as they say, my body, my business.”

lena, tell me, do you know how to cook delicious food? koren, no one has complained yet, let’s give useful advice to those who don’t know how to cook, men or something, well, men too, it ’s easy, look, here’s a universal recipe, that’s it the products you have in the house are as small as possible.

let's give advice to those who want to laugh, please, make yourself more comfortable in front of the tv, turn up the volume, watch the performances of funny artists, because now the clown-mime-theater stage is a world of faces.

is that you, well, did you get enough sleep? gentlemen, just a minute, we have a big day today, a big holiday, we haven’t seen each other for a long time, well, you know, for every cool fighter there’s an even cooler one. fell in love with them, but who is good for you, your wife or your boys, don’t ask stupid questions now, they are still loved, you are responsible for your words, i am always responsible for my words, a hero from his time, beauty, rapping, the whole brigade, only on the platform we look, where? people of different professions and animals of different breeds are waiting, but they have one thing in common: sincere, strong friendship. fall in love with a white

fluffy one? i said, i want a white cat, here comes my good one, pet the stubborn one, he likes to grab there with his toes, so tame the biting one, voice, voice, give me a paw, give me a paw, well done, well done, a stray from the sky flies to my shoulder parrot, the stars are ready to do anything for the sake of their invisible pets, where are you flying after the performance , you are in a hurry, guys, i need to feed the hamster, you are among friends, among friends, a program for the whole family, on saturdays on rtr.

away artist, continued on monday on rtr, altai, a majestic mountainous country, nature has generously rewarded this region, picturesque green valleys, waterfalls, mountain ranges, snow-white peaks and glaciers, beluga whales are especially rich in glaciers, belukha is

the highest point of siberia and the cradle of the great altai river katun, a pearl among the mountains, lake teletskoye, altai has always been a source of legends and myths, even today. mysterious beauty fascinates people, just as it did many centuries ago. who are we, where are we going, what kind of country are we, what is our goal?

and the fight for our values, for us, for russia, for the russian world, for our past, i understand that - such responsibility lies with me - this is my path, this is my life, my destiny, life and destiny, from monday to friday on rtr, oh, haren, what's wrong with you, are you ra? this is the other side of the art of cooking, what about a frying pan? she is, in general, the one to study everything the intricacies of cooking, you need to start doing it from childhood, like in sports, that’s right, right, karen, my friend put her son on a bike at 4 years old, and he rode, and now how old is he? now he is

8 years old, i can imagine where he went in 4 years, now he is probably already far away. in what sense, karen, why are you scaring me, i almost didn’t believe it, listen, don’t scare me, you know you can’t scare me, why? well, because i'm scared, better tell me, what's your culinary news? for example, i learned throw a pancake with a frying pan, what are you doing? now all that remains is to learn how to catch this pancake in time to dodge the frying pan, yes. who has everything at once: has an appearance, no voice, has a voice, is bad with humor, but the artist who will now appear on this stage has everything in its place, you look at his performance and get around, meet the incredible karen avanesyan on stage. i have one friend,

and he, like all southerners, loves to eat very tasty, and his favorite dish is, you know what, lamprey fish, well, there is such a fish called she’s a lamprey, so one day in a small town he ran into a restaurant to have lunch, well , a waiter immediately flies up to him, hands him a menu, says that we’ll order... evzhanin looked at him carefully and said: “dear, why a menu, i want eat lamprey." the waiter says: great, we have excellent cuisine, we’ll feed you enough, but what

exactly do you want? he says, i told you, i want to eat? a lot, the waiter says: i understand that there is a lot, but what exactly, mushroom stupa, steak, kebab, he says, okay, dear, bring everything you said, but the main thing is, lamprey, the waiter says, but you didn’t say how many servings you need, two, three, he says, “no, two or three are not necessary, one serving, but a lot.” the waiter says: “okay, i ’ll make you a big cold plate, a whole tureen of hot food, a bowl of salad and a bucket of fruit.” someone got offended and said, why a bucket? am i a horse or something, or do you think

my russian language is bad? i understand, i understand very well, but they don’t understand there.” i say, chocolate, she says, any color, i say, sweet, she says, i don’t know, i haven’t tried it, i say. give me one, i'll give you mine i’ll give it to the girl, she really likes to eat sawdust, listen, they almost went crazy there, the waiter is screaming, you misunderstood the name

, but how else can you understand, i was driving yesterday, i saw a stall, it said ram 200 rubles, that’s what it says ram 200 rub. i accelerated in the jeep and they rammed it. i don’t want any wasps, i want the lamprey alexander says, so wait, wait a second, let me figure it out, are you expecting guests, or

will you take all this with you, no, i’m not waiting for anyone, i won’t take anything with me, i’ll sit here, i’ll eat it, i’ll like it all myself, more i’ll order whatever you order, eat the lamprey, the waiter is crying, so i told you the same thing... i offered, no, what did you say, a basin of meat, a bucket, soup, is that a lamprey, the waiter looks at him, says, and you know, that eating so much is bad for your health, did you consult a doctor, yes, a doctor i know told me, if you want to be healthy, beautiful, strong, don’t listen to anyone, eat minnows, yes, under such a... diet it won’t hurt to drink, of course, of course, dear, it won’t hurt, the waiter busily took out a notepad so that we will drink,

cognac, whiskey, ah, dear, cognac, and whiskey, and wine, but only if there is lamprey, the waiter couldn’t stand it, that’s it, you won’t find it enough, i’ll give you... a whole truckload of food, a whole truckload of alcohol, that’s enough for you, he’s paying, dear, i’m paying for everything, i don’t have any money it’s a pity, but if there’s no lamprey, you’ll eat and drink these two trucks yourself. lenska, i'm sorry, but what are you reading now? you understand, i want to cook for the audience, but what about some exotic dish?

look, look, so what’s the recipe: add 8 mg of bee milk, yeah, listen, karen, bee milk, but also bird milk back and forth, bee, what kind of bee is this, now i’ll explain, bee, yeah, it’s some kind of wasp, yeah. like a mosquito, but only a fly, well , what is a bee? prefabricated meat, i asked, i said, what does prefabricated meat mean, the waiter explained to me, prefabricated meat is 50% rabbit and 50% chicken. listen, it says: cook over low heat, stirring during the day. listen, when do you sleep,

how many hours do you sleep in general, i strictly follow the regime, i sleep 8 hours a day, a day, and at night, are you awake? no, this dish doesn’t suit us, then we’ll greet the audience with bread the old fashioned way and... everything will be fine, yes, i promise you, in just a couple of days i’ll finish writing one erotic scene , and the novel is on your table, we agreed on 2 days. everything, good, great, everything, thank you, so that means he unbuttoned her blouse. released

it like the skin of an overripe banana, he he tore off her blouse, slid his lips over her body, like a paddle on ice, no, it won’t do, he tore off her blouse, she passionately. whispered, take out the trash, what other trash, i brought trash, take it out for you, dear, well , you see, i’m working, and you see, i’m working, i’m in the creative process, god, i’m a writer, understand, i have one scene left, finish writing, don’t bother me, please, just daria dontsova, male, i’m trying to finish the novel, that’s it, he tore off her blouse,

a complete one fell from her lips. hello, crook, take out the trash, i'll take out your trash, first i need finish writing this erotic scene, well, don’t interfere, but god, well, i asked you, tell me what you sprinkled there, let me help you, well , hurry up, okay, he tore off her blouse, reached out to her with his lips, and so on snored gently, why did he snore, well, remember ours... but what does it have to do with me, i have a character here, he tore off her blouse, well, reached out to her with his lips, and she, trembling with desire, and she , trembling with desire for the mood, turned on song by stas mikhailov, it seems like something started between them, it had even ended, when it ended, then stas mikhailov finished the second verse,

come on, let me see... i’ll see what you sprinkled there , let me, and god, he tore off her blouse, reached out to her with his lips, yes, oh, i like this about the banana, lord, what, what nonsense, well, you’re a writer, where’s the truth of life, where do you write? "she let out a low, drawn-out moan when she returned home after the second shift, when she saw her husband on the sofa, in only his shorts, her body just shook with the desire to punch him in the face, she controlled

herself and said:": gently, well, take, take my heavy bags, you asshole! then she threw the chicken into the microwave, and he came up from behind, he put his arm around her shoulders, and he, and he whispered passionately in her ear, let me, let me eat! erotic thoughts swirled in her head like panties in a washing machine, she, she shouted to him out of despair, take out the trash, that’s enough, give it here, this is not literature at all, what are you talking about, have you gone crazy, what kind of literature, what kind of literature , oh, this is our life with you, oh, and where did you

see this? remember our anniversary, how long can you remember this anniversary, and you understand, i need eroticism, turn it on me, these are 75 kg of the purest mouths, well , do something else, well, i need it on paper, god, my god, okay, on paper, so on paper, write. he hugged her passionately, and goosebumps danced all over her body, wait, don’t rush, first you need to take off your blouse, god, not from you, saved me, when we take it off, when, when i finish, you understand, writer, woman,

she’s like book. she wants to be read, and if someone thinks that they only read half a page once. in six months that’s all, then he i should know that we have the most reading country in the world, i understand you, and a good book will find its reader, i understand, bunny, the main thing is not to be nervous. “i promise you, i ’ll finish it, everything i write here, we’ll have, yes, yes, okay, i didn’t say it, you said it, okay, well then write, write, write, i’ll dictate , she came, she came home, speechless from what she saw,

the floor was strewn with rose petals, the dishes were washed until they were shining, there was garbage for 2 months in advance, in the corridor she saw her whole dream. life, she saw a wonderful, beautiful, expensive noise, woman, press the brake, and the brake, at that time they were silent, in the kitchen she was peeling potatoes, no, he came up to her and passionately whispered, yes, yes, he passionately whispered, i nailed a shelf for your kitchen, thank you, she said, thank you, darling, finally, i’ve been waiting for this news for 15 years, thank you, no, he

tore off her blouse, like that, threw her on the sofa , science whispered to her, science whispered to her, i want , i really want your mother to come to us, no, yes, i put the car keys in her hand pink renault car. that's it, that's it, that's it, the end of the novel, the end of the novel? yes, i promised. and... an impulse, now with these hands i’ll take it and take out the trash.

meet the international festival slavic bazaar on monday on rtr. you're married, it's true. nastya, let's talk. on friday. i really need help, something to come up with, how cool he is already, maybe this is your chance, one says he loves you, nastya, you

wanted this, you really love me, the other loves me, but doesn’t say it, i would like to take your portrait , do you mind, just tell me. and i mine feelings, who are you? forget nastya. i am, of course, a romantic fool. last chance, friday on rtr. there are places that fascinate because they are part of the cultural code, because they have power, beauty and history. conquer. the order is ready. explore. nature, mother. dear, just incredible beauty, you already understand what the vietnamese’s favorite means of transportation is, there are 10 million moped drivers here, try it, oh, your eyes wide open, how delicious everything is,

as my mother says, eat your godfather, this world is worth it see him, caster smey is the oldest profession in india. they say that a properly made bukhara knife became a real amulet for its owner. a secret to the whole world. on rtr, white dance, comrades, ladies invite cavaliers, look at rtr, ah, unfortunate donjuann, of course i feel sorry for his wife gulnarochka, i immediately saw that he is a monogamist, sooner or later he will cheat on each other anyway, what have you done , yura? what have you done? fifth blood group from monday on rtr.

hello, dear friends, your favorite program is on air for 60 minutes. vladimir vladimirovich, let’s talk about all the issues, dismount. place nuclear weapons. i have already demanded that we get nuclear weapons. get ready number one. let's sign up, look, look, maybe we'll go

to my place, just watch a movie, karen, now you can pass the cooking exam right away, easy, easy, well then, pull out the ticket, come on, well, this one, for example, come on, whatever it is, so, forks, forks, forks, uh-huh, so, say. a fork with four tines, think, well, with four, yes, this is for a side dish, that's right, a fork with three tines, tense up, with three for meat, oh, now the question is more complicated, a fork with two teeth, oh, do you want to fill me up, yes, it won’t work, with two, this is... for fish, oh, you have to , you know, but now the question is about filling,

a fork with one tooth, with one, with one, think, karen, think, a fork with one tooth is a knife, well done, karen, i passed the exam, well, it couldn’t have been any other way, and now champagne for everyone at my expense, for everyone, our guest is stas. they ran with you, leaving traces like shadows from the sun, it’s a pity. we never touched the ground,

let's not go back, you come to me there, where there is water outside the windows, we will not leave you light, loneliness, without you, the moon is burning, and the sea is so waved. a street without a agent, a sad spring, but we just kiss, the clock is frozen in the sand. in the cool dawn, who turns the ring back, let’s not

notice, come to me where there is water outside the windows, you won’t leave the light, loneliness, here then. the moon mourns and the sea is so worried, without you, sad spring, just new.

but we're just kissing without a stand, the fun is fast and the sea is so worried without a day of sadness clear, but we are just kissing, without you, yes, the moon is burning and the sea is so worried, without a day. well, since we are talking about cooking, i want to invite you to a restaurant, well, just

lenochka, i’m tired of this naval pasta, look, they sent me a sample menu by mail, my head is just spinning, what kind of restaurant is this, karen? but it doesn’t matter, i pay for everything, so choose for yourself, well, look, rabbit ragout in cream sauce, uh-huh, duck with potatoes and rosemary, oh, turkey with sweet potatoes, with ostrich meat pate, look, mussel meat with smoked seaweed, and even champignons, that's enough, that's enough, don't read any further, i can't hear it anymore, choose any dish, well, i personally recommend it to you... do you associate it? well, when i'm with a lady, i feel like , tell me, my friend, with this animal you feel like a tiger, sometimes even a lion. oh, then everything is clear, you are a cat, well, yes, but

have you ever felt like a cat? in what sense? what did you give me assortment? food, i don’t understand, rabbit horn in cream sauce is for cats, yes, creamy sauce - this is for cats, and cats too, well, do you want to go with me to this restaurant and eat midi meat with seaweed and smoked champignons? no longer, i fundamentally prefer naval-style pasta, okay, karan, do some navy-style pasta. on stage in the first line of the artistic menu svyatoslav yeshchenko.

dear viewers, i now want to show an observation of my friend. just imagine this. heavy-set brunette, caucasian, father of many children, i once watched him scream under the windows of the maternity hospital, so this one was born scene, nurse, and hello, and crap, please tell me who was born to me, he was born, it’s true, it’s true, girl, bah, i ’ve been waiting for him so much. and then you rearrange my boy , a whole six pieces. thank you girl, how does he feel? how is your wife?

normal, so-so. move the cognac urgently, the doctor said that your wife should beat your wife, you should drink cognac, for his health.

bad, yes, on the contrary, it’s good, let him learn to use a glass from childhood, okay, what kind of cane have you, no one knows that a ruler is also a glass, yes, why, a ruler at a sewing studio, my girl is there too, ponisosh, panisosh, what did you want , but you have to go a long way there, money for a taxi, give me 500 rubles. 500 rub. there is a squirrel there, 200 is enough there, gasoline has risen in price by 400, no less, 300 and not a penny more, okay, neither you nor

me is 350, but okay, we persuaded you, height is not necessary at all, just say, girl, beautiful, what are you, the bomb , looks like me, no, i’m telling you, handsome.

listen, i’m shocked, they just told me that a tomato is a berry, can you imagine how to now determine which are vegetables and which are berries? how's the cook? with a lot of experience, i can give you free advice. listen, everything you just named needs to be cooked. and what? so what?

if the result is soup, it means vegetables; if compote, it means berries. i can't cook anything right now. my stove broke. the repairman was called, but he refused to fix the stove. strange. which master did you call? which one do you need? the stove broke, i called a tiler. oh, listen, there is another way to get jam, you don’t have to boil the berries, you can just sprinkle them with sugar, and it’s even simpler, you can squeeze the dough out of donuts, you give healthy nutrition, you give, as they say, in a healthy body, a very healthy mind, and nikolai lukinsky will now demonstrate healthy humor to us, welcome.

when my son was born, he had a baby, you know, i didn’t know whether to cry or laugh, no, a normal boy, that’s all, healthy, yes, but he turned out, you know, what a fashionable word now is, indigo, indigo, but in our opinion, a prodigy, can you imagine, this kid, he, he, when he was just born, instead of yelling like all children, he... began to doctors suggest where to properly tie the umbilical cord, and then reassured the mother and made a feeding schedule. the family home was in shock, they called a council, checked that the child was normal, healthy, and he, my sasha, thanked everyone for their attention and went home on his own,

so they didn’t keep him in the nursery for long at all, who needs a baby who... swaddles himself the rest sings a lullaby to them in the voice of vitas, the bobwark nannies fall, in kindergarten the same thing, yes, after the visit of the mayor, whom, by the way, my sashok promoted to great renovation, how he also drew up a development schedule, this sashok is mine, drew up a development plan for educators with an accuracy of milligrams... counted how many products the cooks take away in bags from work every day in the evenings, so when i was called to a parent-teacher meeting at school, i wasn’t even surprised, the headmistress first praised sashka, then began to scold him, yes, the teachers don’t want to feel like idiots after his answers, yes, all the children agreed,

yes, pythagorean pants on all sides. of course i'm worried, i pressed sashka so close to i say to myself, listen, who are you like, son, well, in our family, i say, well, it’s not like there were geniuses, we didn’t even have people who didn’t drink, including me, he somehow looked so intently at me he looked at his eyes and said: okay, dad, i’ll fix it, imagine, he immediately invented some kind of microscopic nanorobot,

threw it into my borscht, and i know, i knew, i swallowed this robot, and it began to change all my habits from the inside, instead of beer, i suddenly switched to kefir, instead of cigarettes , socks with a straw, well, instead of a goat, in dominoes, i’m ashamed to admit, in the queen of spades big theater, i already feel that i am not me, but this is some kind of fermented milk nerd, and well... the buddies are all offended at me, you know, because their wives poke me in the face, they set them as an example, yes, and at the same time, it means that they are all goats there, playing dominoes with fumes, and i am a library with cologne, and my head is looking at my friends, my legs are leading in the other direction, i, you know,

i’m my neighbor , in short, he works in... he serves, i asked him, i said, listen, can you send the boy to some sanatorium for the difficult to educate, no problem, everything was taken to sashka’s camp, but i think, well, everyone there will turn him into a normal person, what do you think, in a week the head of this colony for the difficult to educate comes with this bouquet of flowers, with this bouquet, she says, thank you for your son, because, he says that already on the third day our troubled teenagers quietly switched to english from mata, but what is he doing with home appliances? past, past the washing machine, he tricked her a little, it’s impossible to pass, i walk past the washing machine, and she tells me: you need to change your sock bed linen, and when i go to the toilet, the barrel

speaks in a human voice, the toilet is clean, the owner’s face. after eight o’clock i pull the handle into the refrigerator, it closes itself, it closes itself and says: attention, today you have already... completely devoured your daily kilocalorie allowance. the next meal is tomorrow at 8:00. i don't know whether to cry or laugh. i, i think, sashok, what awaits you in life? either you, or will you come to your senses and become like everyone else, or will the world change for you? and it will get a little better.

hello, i'm arseny, what's your name? what further? will you ride the bus with me all day? on saturday. daughter, where is the world coming to? you are so calmly ready to accept that our son is dating a trolleybus or bus driver. there is no more beautiful story in the world than a story. about neighbor and neighbor. my son and your daughter. why don't you like him? yes, their whole family doesn’t suit me. played to spite your parents and that's enough? maybe you are evil? but not me. oh, things are under one roof. on saturday on

rtr. it can be interesting for everyone. fiery release of the most exciting programs. brewed. let's visit the presidential garden, look, study, of course, it is very interesting, the footage and comments that are a disgrace to anyone, no longer exist, only we see dangerous ones. bright and unusual situations in the world of big politics, don’t retreat and don’t give up, i already refused him once,

you once, and he approached you a second time, we saw the whole television season and showed you more than others, we’ll do it now, there’s something show, there is something to be proud of, moscow, the kremlin, putin, let’s look. today on rtr, hello, on the rossiya vesti tv channel, in the irina rossius studio and the main topic for this hour: these are historical images. the whole world is discussing the assassination attempt on donald trump today. the politician has already announced that he will participate in the republican party convention, where he should be officially announced as a presidential candidate.