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tv   Taini sledstviya-15  RUSSIA1  August 31, 2024 4:00pm-5:01pm MSK

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grandpa, don't worry, i learned your alphabet a long time ago, look, a is watermelon, b is grandma, c is jam, g is dove, d is grandfather, kind, sincere friend of children, let's go, grandpa, i'll pour you some of daddy's jam. if you think that daddy will let his son go alone to this terrible city for a golden rod with diamonds like these, you don't know bender well, subject, although, what can you do now,
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i am your father, you have no father, you are conceived, immaculate, son of a bitch, you are a son, a golden rod, how much can it cost, to have a million, back, all back, back, i'll rip off, everyone, you bastard, dad, stubborn as hell, and you're just a creator, i'm punished. thresholds of greed vanity. benda - the beginning. and the atmosphere. on friday. on rtr. we invite you to the swissotel sharmel sheikh. the world's first swissotel, working on the all system. give yourself
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a vacation where elegance and natural beauty merge into perfect harmony, create memories that will remain forever in your heart. swissotel sharmel sheikh is your ideal place in the heart of the city. rum, castro, a product of stellar group. allow yourself a first-class vacation with leo resorts, elegant details, a feast of exquisite tastes, a variety of entertainment, a golden beach and azure waves. lio reorts, we are here for you! titanic deluxe golf hotel! where every
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moment is exceptional. wrap yourself in comfort by our pools, relax in the spa, enjoy exquisite dishes from the best restaurants. here, every room is a journey to coziness and comfort. your vacation - your rules. titanic deluxe, golf bellet - the best choice for an unforgettable vacation. catch a fish. big or small, well, in general, you chose the right place, you have you ever wondered why people count proteins, fats, carbohydrates, here my question begins: can tasty be healthy? i try, the level of inflammation decreases, the pain decreases, can healthy be pleasant, fantastic, can scientific be understandable, and you make a wish? yes, yes, yes, yes, once again,
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yes, every person in any region of russia can make their diet not only tasty, but also healthy, and this lifts the mood, that's for sure, the formula of food, on sunday on rtr. provocation is treacherous behavior, there is a difference between a man and a woman, i noticed, then it turns out that my husband and my cat are the most intelligent creatures in our family. orientalism, this is some kind of parallel agenda, isn't it a reef? continuation of the conversation. in new issues of our
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podcasts, and in order not to miss anything, subscribe, listen, watch on the media platform, we are watching, substation one. castes that we are watching, tell us how it was, you always have a choice, there will be a case for you, shoot, well, get acquainted or break up, marry me, again, your offer, salvation for me, but we can't just remain friends, suffer or act, we lost our son, alyosha is alive, i believe in it, search or hide, i won't take my eyes off her now, have you conspired, or what? leave or return, where you need to go, and you are a bus driver, or maybe you can order me a taxi, but whatever you choose, this meeting cannot be cancelled, only to look at the profit, or will you take part, from monday to thursday, you are very busy, what is being shown,
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the very thing, the time has come for big premieres on rtr, put out the candle, light the hay, with us you won't get bored. memories of school flash through a person's head all their life. all sorts of situations, incidents in class, incidents during exams, student relationships with different teachers, skipping classes, students' tricks to avoid being called to the board. what to do with the diary, show it to parents? or not show it, it's like in the joke, son, show me your diary, what's there to look at, mom, the main thing is that we are healthy, though, all this comes to mind fragmentarily, along with nostalgia for my childhood years,
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such moments flash, flash, and i still i hear my mother's voice, so... it's time to go home, so here it is, i will be your new class teacher, i imagined you completely different, well yes, probably old, ugly, no, on the contrary, young and handsome, mom, who do you need, well mom, what do you need, i want to write, and have you done your homework? your grandson is very weak in geography, it doesn't matter, with our income you won't get far, dad,
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our new class teacher calls you to school, so what did you do there? what difference does it make to you, go and you won't regret it, not a single dad has ever complained. come here, son, come on tell me what you did in drawing class today, did you draw mom, how did mom do it again, yesterday you drew mom, yesterday you drew mom, well i don't know, the teacher comes into the class and says: draw fast, motherfucker, so, rozumovsky, math, two, russian, two, behavior. unsatisfactory, that's it, take it, your father will sit when he sees your diary, he won't, he's bald, aren't you ashamed,
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you're looking at an erotic magazine during class, i want to see your parents right now, but what does she see them for, there's mom on the thirty-fifth page, dad on the forty-sixth. mardryan, do you know that stamens and pistils in flowers, reproductive organs, both, and i smelled them, mikhail anatovich, just a second, please, mikhail anatolyevich, why are you always picking on my son, i'm picking on him, and your son. doesn't know anything at all, here you go, sashenka, please tell me how much 7 * 8 is, dad, you see, it's starting again, comrade teacher, yes, yes, why do your children say came, gone, who
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knows, maybe they're so used to it, tell me how much 2.2 is? five, yesterday in class you they said four, and today i want to haggle with you, haggle, four, five, four, five, four, four, so - belov, tell me please, where does the electricity come from, from the zoo, why? well, last night, when there was no light, dad said, those macaques turned off the electricity again, bukhavtsov, tell me two pronouns, who am i, you, you, i am not you, i am you, oh, you, in the sense of they, no, in the sense of i, and where are they, and they are somewhere, who, someone, where, somewhere, well kamsov, you -
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what is this, mikhail lvovich, i - this is not you, not he, not she and not they, if someone, any, me, somewhere, for some reason, then i and him, you, and somehow, and something, and somewhere, 16 pronouns in one sentence, muhartsov, an a for the quarter, for the year, for the whole life, give me your diary. i, you, you, the most important fight that the school wages is the fight against student laziness. the sacramental question: did you do your homework and the answers to it give many reasons for humor. ivanov, who is archimedes? is he some kind of scientist, an academician or a professor, maybe? maybe he somehow washed himself in the bath closed eureka, and what does
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eureka mean? well, like found, and what did he find? well, soap, probably. but the teacher wrote in the father's diary: your son knows nothing. the father wrote in response: that's why i 'm sending him. to your school, what claims can you have against me at all, a russian language lesson in a pre-revolutionary village school, for a minute, let's assume that here we have a class, the students are sitting, the teacher comes into the class, asks the students: well! well, guys,
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have you learned what i asked you, you've learned, yeah, well, kolya, have you learned what i asked you, who? well, yes, you, you, i, well yes, you, ah, learned. what did you teach me, who? well yes, you, i, well yes, you, ah, well i learned, well what are you, i learned this , what's it called, this, shtish learned, mazhichok with this, what's it called, with nogodkom, come on, come on answer. now, now, verse,
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verse, oh, once in the green winter time, i rode out of the forest, severe frost, the frost was severe, i call, a healthy one climbs up the mountain, a horse of luck, a horse of luck, a cart of luck, firewood from a cell, not from the woodcutters. from the forest whistle, witch, father, listen to
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this brew, it's brewing, and i'm taking it away, what a racer for you, go away to your place, it hurts, you, you, like me, like you, like you, it's a big family , my father, it's big, and how many men are there, my father and i, with my father, yeah, you're laughing, i won't do it anymore. school reform is an important problem of transition to our native education system, and it would be useful for many of our teachers to remember our history and learn it by heart for the rest of their lives,
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and never change it again. surveys of high school students have shown that the overwhelming majority reveals a discouraging lack of education. i cite cases documentary. schoolchildren were asked questions during recess, who invented newton's law? answer: i don't know, how many centimeters are in one kilometer? well, 50 centimeters, they answered. how many digits are in the word five. seven, how many lungs does a person have, one, what date is march 8 this year, the ninth, written surveys of students and tests showed that it was time to sound the alarm, friends, a short test for outlook, by the way, not everyone knew what
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outlook was, the senior group is aged 14 to 16, only two. knew the meaning of the word dependent, the rest answered: this is someone who lives alone, a person who has lived on, who does not obey the laws, that dependent who has escaped from prison, who gets up early, or just i don’t know, none of the schoolchildren understand the word navsnich, to the request to come up with a phrase with this word:
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the answers were: this is when he opens letters and parcels, these are cages in the zoo, old unnecessary cars, here from...
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church people there was such an option finally discouraging viktor tsoi. maidelshtal, mandenshtan and mimelshtoy. there is a myth that children are supposedly good at understanding new communication systems. alas, friends, in most cases it doesn't go beyond social networks, toy apps.
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it's even a big problem for them to enter the right address correctly, so gentlemen. comrades, sos, school reform. hello, children, i'm your new teacher of russian language and literature. i'll try to convey to you all the beauty of our language: the high style of pushkin, the subtle humor of griboyedov, the deep meaning of gogol's work, and for the starlets who are squealing at the back desks, right away. and if they don't suck it in the topic at once, will understand a serious swing on the carpet of the owner of the school, that you stretch your hand
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four-eyed, that you want to ask where i studied, i answer in rhyme, where, where, everywhere , where i sat, there i studied. now remember, engrave it in your nose, by tomorrow the whole poem by heart, whoever starts to drive nonsense, i will make him read from right to left, and now get out of here, our destinies are the same, from bell to bell, now they will definitely learn, i tell you this for sure, "i understand, i will be soon, and that crime
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is big, it appears where it is not expected, mom didn't waste time, didn't have time to arrive, already became a witness to the crime, i think i know the motive, agatha, but not christie, invite, but get to know better, likes to unravel cases, but not shvetsova, even if there..." there were clues, now they are gone, suddenly this is not an accident, but a murder, there is some kind of secret here, nothing, tie it to a tree, hands, quietly, look, the lady returns like a dog, capricious character, overestimated self-esteem, opportunity hello, in my opinion, everything is accurate, from monday on rtr. discover a real pearl on the coast bodrum, titanic luxury collection bodrum,
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veda vodka, a product of stellor group. who are we, where are we going, what kind of country are we, what is the value for us? we have not changed. a russian person remains a russian person. they are not afraid of anything. of course, there is something inside, a chill, such, maybe. learn everything, do not retreat from anything, i will still do what i do, the higher the pressure, the stronger the concrete, everything, never to change myself, i don't have a family every year, i have a family every minute, it can't be any other way, now there is a fight for our values, for us, for russia, for the russian world, for our past, i understand that... and such responsibility is on me - this is my path, this is my life, my destiny. life and destiny from
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monday to friday on rtr. i ask a question, and you answer, agreed. sometimes you need to rethink the situation. give me 3 days, i want to understand what's going on. often it is necessary to rebuild tactics, i just wanted us, don't push, please, give time, it is always important to review secret investigations, there is a version, from monday to friday on rtr. international festival of sports and music. belarus, uzbekistan, china, cuba, fantastic colors, unforgettable rhythms.
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that the eu commission, there is such an office to eliminate discrimination, decided to replace the word drunk with a person of a non-traditional level of sobriety, such people are with us too, of a non-traditional level of sobriety, unfortunately, there are, they have their own basis for safety technology, so that a
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champagne cork does not get into your eye. you need to drink vodka. so, these figures of the alcohol culture, as was said, of a non-traditional level of sobriety, like not only to drink, but also to talk. and the children, by the way, listen. tell me, one says, will you take part in the flash mob 2 days without alcohol? definitely, of course, because it will take place from february 30 to 31. investigator frolov listens: why me? yes, but i have never done this, is it not scary? well, okay, what are the signs? straight nose, dark hair, karia eyes, what kind of jumper? okay?
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mister policeman, oh, how, but i did not understand, should i say hello now or should i bow straight away, don't be sarcastic, ivanov, come on, tell me what happened there, first of all, first of all, well, so, did we get together to have a drink? who,
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who are we? well, who, who? kuzin, zyuzin and i, so, well, well, we drank, okay, then we added, well, then we added, so, okay, yes, no, okay, it became after the third, well, and then we added, what the...
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from the ninth floor, like ivanov, but i didn't crash, but bounced off the clotheslines and was thrown onto someone's balcony, so i thought that i was at home, well, i went to fulfill a marital duty, fulfilled. lay down next to the prospective spouse, well and fell asleep, that i woke up from the fact that the prospective spouse was screaming in an inhuman voice of citizen karapetyan, i thought? and why
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is it that my wife has less hair on her head than on her chin, and so tenderly leaned against her. i say, she's tired, i say, darling, rest, sleep, kissed his bald head, walked away, good, and what, karapetyan, karapetyan lost consciousness, and i thought that my wife fell asleep, well i went to look for khuzin, izusin, found, found. well, we added, the culmination, the culmination of ivanov, and that means i'm skipping the next 2 days too, okay, on the morning of the fifth day, so we heard
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some scream in the yard, but we immediately went there, and there, and there in the middle of the yard there's an old woman, an old woman, yes. looking somewhere up and screaming as if her hand had fallen and she couldn't open it, well , what's up there, there's a tree up there, so, there are branches on the tree, there are probably leaves on the branches , and no, there weren't leaves, no, on the branches... a cat, a cat, a cat, who ran away from that old woman there, well, so what, we, we, we, we decided help, here is kuzin, kuzin or zyuzin, wait,
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i confuse them all the time, after this they are similar, then kuzin said that if a cat holds on to a tree with its claws, and you cut off these claws, he will definitely fall down he ran for a shotgun, why? well for a shotgun, well he fired, and what happened to the cat? the cat had a complete apocalypse. okay, next. then kuzin, here or zyuzin, it doesn't matter, he said that we were too cold with the cat, that if we were warmer with him, he would definitely fall down and made
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a fire under the tree, for what purpose? well, kuzin logically assumed that if the cat was properly warmed up, he would definitely let go of his paw. to wipe under his forehead, logically, and so what happened? the cat sweated, but did not fall, and then cousin assumed logically that he needed to be knocked down, and we threw the old woman there. the old woman, the old woman, and what, the old woman did
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not mind? well, she yelled something unintelligible, inarticulate, something yes, why unintelligible, only her false jaw burned in the fire. did the old woman fall into the fire? no, she tried through this jaw, the fire, the butt. okay, you threw the old woman, the old woman, into the tree, and the bone fell into the tarpaulin we had stretched, that's it, but now... the old woman screamed, then cousin or it doesn't matter, he decided that now the old woman needed to be knocked down with the cat, she would catch it with both hands and
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let go, well, and we threw the cat there, she caught it, she caught it. but she didn't fall, but hung upside down, clinging to a branch with her two hind legs on like... a mouse to fall down, she refused, no matter how the cat tried to persuade her, so on and on, then cousin logically assumed that the tree needed to be cut down? they cut it down,
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they cut it down, where is the old woman? in the hospital with fractures? where is the cat? in the hospital with fractures, where are kuzin and zyuzin? kuzin and zyuzin are in the hospital with a fracture? and why are they? what about them too? lucky man, get ready, where, let's go, where, a date, with whom, and there to you. "citizen, karapetyan came, why, he came to you with flowers
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and champagne, with champagne - that's good, that's where we'll add, our service is dangerous log cabin!". let's go to school, we need to figure out what's going on there now, they even came up with a school dictionary there now, the teacher's arrival, the court is in session, teacher students, alibaba and the 40 thieves, diary, book of complaints and suggestions, peccovet, much ado about nothing, back desk, holiday home, toilet, cheat sheet-storage,
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geography teacher, talking globe, oh how, history teacher, how was it, physical education teacher, kangaroo, chemistry teacher, test pilot, fire at school, burn-burn, clear, so that it doesn't go out, holidays, long-awaited freedom, some of our schools now, i tell you, have such a bias, my son comes to school recently, some teacher runs up to me, how he starts screaming, this is your child, so small, impudent, black, snotty, like that, he smokes all the time, smokes, smokes, smokes, this is not my child, this is your f...
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i go into the chemistry room, and there above the board mendeleev will live, and the signature of lenin, the chemist , the slogan hangs, mendeleev lived, mendeleev is alive, he saw me, he screamed, what, sit down , please, listen, listen, one
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minute, right now, and put, that is , a record on the record player, and then you won’t believe it, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, and a voice, and why am i i couldn't sit at home, slap, slap, slap, slap, and why couldn't i sit at home, and why couldn't i sit at home, hats, hats, hats, i say, what is this? didn't you recognize that mikhail lomonosov is going to moscow. well, we sit, listen, for about 30 minutes, we listened, i ask, what are we going to listen to all the way to moscow, he says,
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a little bit of good stuff, let's get back to your ram, your son didn't do his homework, i take a bottle out of my briefcase, i say, here it is. homework, like a tear, clean, try it, he glanced at the light, sniffed, says: work deserves attention, let's read together, i say, maybe i'll run for some sausage, he says: no, there's a sea of ​​snacks, second bromine-chlorine, myshnyak. well, we read about two liters, i ask, are you talking about sex with the kids now, you say, yes, yes, i learned a lot of new things, yes,
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listen, maybe we should invite the school principal, he says, no, the principal is in mourning, his physicist has been sending for... parents for the second week , then some two-meter tall giant breaks out and starts yelling, whoever didn't hide, it's not my fault, and he punches the chemist in the ear, what kind of monster is this such, is it really for... the mountain, yes, no, it's vasyak nikolaev, our graduate, i gave him a bad grade in the quarter in 1976, he can't forget, he's walking around, angry,
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at that moment the school principal breaks out and shouts, have you by any chance seen the physics teacher, or else my parents called and asked why i'm here... and what's that smell here? i say: let's drink some valerian, so that our hearts don't hurt, i got out another bottle, we poured out some valerian and drank to our... public education, so that our hearts don't hurt,
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this is for you, are you glad, do you know who? unfortunately, yes, i want you to understand that we are serious, we are expecting a child, you know, let him go, olga krasko, ilya noskov, i will not forgive myself if i do not try to fight, i will bring you back, and i don't care what you think about it, wish map, premiere today on rtr, kalinon belek. where time stops, immerse yourself in sophistication and luxury, forgetting about time on the shores of the mediterranean sea. discover true perfection, making dreams come true.
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hotel kalinan beleg, where life turns into fairy tale. vodka, pechora. product of stellar group. welcome to the newest hotel рixos in sharm el-sheikh. rikssas radomys sharm el -sheikh. the perfect place for a family holiday, where everything is created for the happiness and comfort of children and their parents. escape from everyday life into a world of endless entertainment. enjoy themed rooms, the largest children's town in the region and an unforgettable holiday. riksas. radomyss charmal gin сnop product of stellor group. good morning, my beloved, my voice sounds only for you, my heart it beats...
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morning mail with nikolay baskov, on sunday on rt. "we are giving karina an exclusive three-week tour of south america happy birthday, i don't understand anything,
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and what's going on here, why did you come with a piece of paper in your office i found a decree on divorce, what kind of stupid jokes are these, this is not a joke, this is your new reality. it was erased from our own lives, now we have nothing, no car, no home, i have no business and no husband, so it's time to build a new one, tell me, are you seriously deciding to get going, i want to prove that it is impossible to drown me, there is a stable burning, what is this, how, andrey, where, where is andrey, i am all.
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yes, somewhere there is a city, quiet as a dream, guys, don't hurry, don't grow up, i really, really want to be everywhere, a girl, sad, loves parties so much, a big festive concert for the day of the sign. the main difference between
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animals and people is that animals do not keep people in their homes, although cats may disagree with me, they say that monkeys can talk, but are silent in front of people, well, so that they wouldn't be forced to work with animals, that's a fable of course, i'll tell you a joke, a fable: a herd of buffaloes is rushing to the watering hole, and a hare jumps out of the bushes and shouts at them: "stop, goats, or i'll break your horns." the buffaloes stop, the hare continues: "is there a tough guy among you? no, then run along the five and get out of here!" they ran on and thought, but he 'll take them every day. scoundrel, we need to get a tough guy, like a wolf, for example, we'll pay him, tomorrow the herd
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of dreams is rushing to the watering hole, the hare jumps out again, stooge pornokohoofny, tough, yes, yes, the hare whistled, a bear appeared from behind him, a hundred from the steep one, fives from the rest, get out of here, business, oh, what only? we didn't tell, didn't show from the section in the animal world, yeah.
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kragadil.
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horoscope for tomorrow, everything will be
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bad for optimists, but they won't notice it, everything will be fine for pessimists.
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we've arrived, grandma! what kind of person is she? and this is our new neighbor, you must admit, a very bright woman, and what can be wrapped in a carpet, only a corpse? sergey peregudov, will you be an investigator, i would like to participate more in this investigation germanova, could you please introduce. as a lawyer, elena yakovleva, there can't be a coincidence, and how virgin, where did you get the idea that i look at us at all, as at a man to sobrevnovat, the lady with the dog returns, i have a new version and
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a new suspect, from monday on rtr, you went to the soo zone volunteers, there are no random people here, everything was very scary, i say, girls, we must. we must go out, that this will be death, that this will be death, there are no made-up stories here, they transplanted to me evgeniya, he was all burnt on the way, my dear friend, don't sleep, talk to me, even sing songs, there are no insincere feelings here, children's letters came, you read, you cry, trouble touched them, it's hard, people of kursk, we are with you, donbass, we are talking openly with...
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you are a scoundrel, dad, stubborn motherfucker, and you are just a creator, i will punish the vices of greed, benda
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beginning and atmosphere on friday on rtr. hello on the russia tv channel, news in the studio of the chukovs and the main thing by this hour. in kamchatka, there was another helicopter with tourists on board , there were 22 people, including vip passengers. the barbaric shelling of belgorod. five people were killed, almost fifty were wounded, doctors are fighting for their lives.
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the enemy is being driven out of our territories in the kursk border area.

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