gary clark jr. will be here! we have the smoke machine going.o that, let's bring a little meaning into all of our lives! i don't know what i'm talking about. let's get to the big news today! breathless anticipation at trump tower over an important and perhaps earthshaking development in the world of former president donald j. trump. >> celebrations are underway for former president trump after claiming he won two golf trophies at his west palm beach club. >> jon: that's right, woke libs! you think donald trump is a loser? well, would a loser brag about winning a golf tournament at his own course? i don't think so! although, obviously, trump has an advantage playing golf. it's difficult for his opponents to stay focused when they spend all that time staring at dat ass. come on. [cheers and applause] a lot of times, golfers let you grab them by the asshole. they love it if you are a celebrity. that is the worst trump impression in the history. actually, trump, one of the few talented golfers who has a thick ass and a front butt. he has a front but