meyers.ht -- seth and dua lipa go "day drinking." geor

i'm seth meyers. this is "late night.ou're doing well and now if you don't mind, we're going the get to the news. president biden traveled yesterday to nantucket said one secret service agent, "yes, sir, we've all heard the poem." [ laughter ] that's right, president biden traveled yesterday to nantucket to spend thanksgiving with his family because the wish bone is currently his best chance in 2024 [ laughter ] president biden and his family are set to spend thanksgiving on nantucket at the $39 million home of private equity billionaire david rubenstein okay, seriously, is anyone at the white house in charge of pr, he won the first election because he was regular old scranton joe the train guy who let him have thanksgiving at a house with the gravy boat is a gravy yacht? [ laughter ] according to new polls, 76% of new york voters believe that republican congressman george santos should resign. while according to him, 147% say he shouldn't [ laughter ] iowa evangelical leader bob vander plaats endorsed florida governor ro

meyers >> seth: good evening! meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news the white house announced yesterday that president biden was interviewed over two days as part of the investigation into his handling of classified documents. it was supposed to be one day, but, you know, when you get that man talking -- [ light laughter ] "should we come back tomorrow and wrap this up?" according to a new report, white house staffers believe that president biden's handling of the war in ukraine and the hamas attack on israel could define his legacy said biden, "oh, good, so not the bike thing?" [ laughter ] former president trump held a campaign rally last night in new hampshire and blamed windmills for killing whales well, normally when someone says something like that, the next thing you see is the backup quarterback warming up on the sidelines. [ laughter ] but, nope, they're leaving him in the game! house republicans held a closed-door meeting

featuring the 8g band with marcus gilmore ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: goodng. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden hosted a reception at the white house today to celebrate hanukkah. and although his speech was just supposed to be one night, it magically lasted for eight [ laughter ] president biden traveled to philadelphia today and spoke at an event with firefighters biden can relate to firefighters because he's also sliding down the polls. [ laughter ] "you smell smoke?" president biden attended a shiva on saturday for legendary tv producer norman lear unable to attend, archie bunker and meathead [ laughter ] according to a new poll, new york mayor eric adams has the lowest approval rating ever recorded for a new york city mayor. in fairness, that's only five points lower than the highest approval rating ever recorded for a new york city mayor. we hate our mayors [ laughter ] it's a very small window president biden traveled last week to las vegas because

just the same, as governor newsom was on live television with seth meyers and he talked about how theity has become the avatar of what is wrong with democratic cities, and the homelessness has gotten national and international attention, and that was one of the main focuses last night. there's a focus to really living attention to the wrongs in the city in order for conservatives to prove themselves right, and he acknowledges the problems are very real and apparent to anybody that visits the city. governor newsom said he is advancing the most -- >> i have threatened to sue my old city, san francisco. we did a big audit and they are finally addressing the housing crisis, the original sin in california, affordability, and none more acute than the issues you see on the streets and sidewalks. >> reporter: now, the governor also talked about the high speed rail project and the plans and delays around that, and 15 years later when the plans were originally talked about to connect southern and northern california, and that plan has not come to fruition because of the delays and funding, and

pat featuring the 8g band with justin faulkner. ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth:ing. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news former president trump testified yesterday at his civil fraud trial and spent nearly four hours on the witness stand, but the judge had to call it a day before they could ask him a third question [ laughter ] during his testimony yesterday, former president trump pulled a piece of paper out of his suit jacket that he claimed would clear his name, but the judge would not let him read it, because as usual, it was classified [ laughter ] that's right, during a civil fraud trial, trump pulled a piece of paper out of a suit jacket and said it would completely clear his name. dude, you couldn't have cleared your name if you'd pulled out a neuralyzer from "men in black. [ laughter ] what piece of paper could possibly clear your name was it a birth certificate with a different name [ laughter ] "your honor, this clears my name, because as you can see, my name is regin

featuring the 8g band with brian frasier-moore. ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth:ing. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news at a fundraiser in boston yesterday, president biden said, quote, "if trump wasn't running, i'm not sure i'd be running. okay, but you can't say that [ light laughter ] it sounds like you're running because he's the only one you can beat it's like the giants say "we're only playing because the jets are playing. [ laughter ] look, we all have the "if trump wasn't rubbing" fantasy. hell, if trump wasn't running, this would be a cooking show [ laughter ] but he is. so - when asked yesterday in a town hall with fox news host sean hannity if he would promise to never abuse power as retribution against anybody, former president trump said, quote, "except for day one." [ light laughter ] well, at least i have nothing to worry about. [ laughter ] after all, this is just a cooking show [ laughter ] during last night's town hall event in iowa, sean hannity asked former

featuring the 8g band with fred armisen ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: good evening meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're all doing well. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news the colorado supreme court ruled yesterday that former president trump is ineligible to run for president, while the florida supreme court ruled he already won. [ light laughter ] supreme court chief justice john roberts spoke yesterday at the memorial service for justice sandra day o'connor and said, quote, "she was so successful that the barriers she broke down are almost unthinkable today," adding, "but we're working on it." [ light laughter ] at a rally last night in iowa, former president trump told the crowd that immigrants are "destroying the blood of our country. pretty ironic thing said in a state that only exists to produce corn syrup [ light laughter ] after facing comparisons to adolf hitler, former president trump said yesterday that immigrants are destroying the blood of our country and added, quote, "they said, oh, hitler said that, in a much different

thank you for watching stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. goodnight, everybody thank you. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers. tonight -- bowen yang from "five nights at freddy's," producer jason blum. an all-new "closer look. featuring the 8g band with greg clark jr. ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news "politico" published an article yesterday titled "biden won't directly address the age issue." well, that's part of the age issue. [ laughter ] guys that age don't directly address anything if you asked your grandpa what time it is, he'll say something like, "come on out back with me, kid, we're gonna make a sundial. [ laughter ] president biden met today with a group of ceos to discuss the economy. "look, we're all strapped for cash," they said -- from space [ laughter ] after federal p

governor newsom talks off the cuff in a late night interview with seth meyers.r breed plans to introduce to move the city forward. >>> plus, how to move the warriors forward with or without draymond green who was benched indefinitely. the big meeting happening today. this is "today in the bay." >>> good thursday morning to you. thanks for starting your day with us. i am laura garcia. >>> i am marcus washington. you want a look at the forecast? well, you don't have to wait. meteorologist, kari hall, is here to give us what to expect. >>> the spots seeing fog, it's not as think as it was, so it looks pretty good here, as we look at our current visibility. in santa rosa, it's down to two miles but it's better than half a mile we saw just a short while ago. we are seeing patchy fog in the north bay, but the east bay is starting out clear as we await the sun's arrival. we will see temperatures in the upper 30s to start, headed for the upper 50s here. it will be a cool day, but we also have rain ahead in our forecast. i will have more on that coming up in a few minute

meyers >> seth: good evening.h meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news the white house today announced new initiatives to combat junk fees sounds like somebody tried to see frankie valli. "convenience fee [ laughter ] get janet yellen on the phone! house republicans today nominated majority leader steve scalise to be the next speaker, while next week's speaker is anyone's guess. [ laughter ] federal prosecutors accused republican congressman george santos yesterday of stealing campaign donors' identities but if you donated money to george santos, you're probably looking for a new identity anyway [ laughter ] that's right federal prosecutors filed 23 charges against republican congressman george santos, including two counts of aggravated identity theft, two counts of wire fraud, and numerous counts of trying to make this look a thing [ laughter ] a group of house republicans who call themselves "ok" for only kevin are reportedly plan

he went on the seth meyers program.ind gavin newsom was for about half a decade. >> ainsley: 2004 to 11. >> steve: about half a decade, the san francisco mayor, and so seth meyers asked him about the deplorable state of san francisco, and it's curious who gavin newsom is blaming for its decay. >> i mean, first you own the issues and then you start to address the issues. look, they have been on a doom loop san francisco ever since nancy pelosi became speaker. i mean, just remember, california is nancy pelosi is the speaker of san francisco. you got kamala harris who was the former senator from california. california has outperformed the american economy. it's the 10th in the american economy. 27% of all-american jobs came from the state last month. fifth largest economy in the world. its values are a stark contrast. difference as daylight and darkness between the republican party. >> brian: yes, absolutely. no argument there i would add this to it. he did not answer the question as usual. he will have to eventually answe

i'm seth meyers. this is "late night.

meyers >> seth: good evening.meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden yesterday announced an additional $200 million in funds for ukraine, which is great. but it's not enough money to fight a war. it's barely enough money to make a movie about a war. [ laughter ] that's right, ukrainian president zelenskyy spoke with lawmakers yesterday on capitol hill and said, keep your weapons, just give me this guy [ laughter ] president biden has reportedly told confidants that he feels guilty about his son hunter's legal issues and feels that hunter wouldn't be facing criminal prosecution if he had not run for president in 2020. hell, with his resume, hunter would be looking at a spot in trump's cabinet. [ laughter ] "secretary of parties. [ laughter ] former president trump is selling pieces of the suit he wore during his mugshot, or for $10, you can just go to a joseph a. bank and get the whole thing. [ laughter ] that's right

, i'm seth meyers. "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news during a speech at the white house yesterday, president biden joked about turning 60 instead of 81. man, nothing drives home how very old you are - [ laughter ] -- more than joking you're only 60 that's still discount bus fare old. [ light laughter ] during the white house turkey pardon yesterday, president biden appeared to mix up taylor swift and britney spears, and just like that, lost 30 million votes [ laughter ] that's right during the turkey pardon yesterday, president biden appeared to mix up taylor swift and britney spears wow, that's almost as bad as the time former president trump called tim cook tim apple, thought frederick douglass was alive, called second corinthians "two corinthians," called kevin mccarthy steve, called paul ryan ron, walked out of an executive order ceremony after forgetting to sign an executive order, and suggested injecting bleach to kill covid [ lau

i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden reportedly told aides in a recent meeting that they need to make progress in reversing his decline in poll numbers, and hopefully jill and travis will understand [ laughter ] according to a new report, president biden frequently tells aides and friends in private conversations that is he feels, quote, "so much younger than his age," and i'm sure he does but it doesn't inspire a ton of confidence when you walk around saying, "man i feel 73! [ laughter ] according to a new report, first lady dr. jill biden is trying to improve president biden's diet, or at least trying to get him to add another food group [ laughter ] the two georgia election workers who won a $148 million verdict on friday against rudy giuliani filed another lawsuit yesterday after giuliani continued making false statements about them. only rudy could lose a $148 million lawsuit and say, "all right, double or nothing! [ laughter ] put it all on blue!" [

meyers >> seth: good evening!meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news during the first ballot in today's house speakership vote, ohio congressman jim jordan fell short of the 217 votes necessary to become speaker. republicans are determined to keep trying until they finally get it wrong [ laughter ] during the first ballot in today's house speakership vote, several republicans voted for former new york congressman lee zeldin, which means they're running out of options, even alphabetically [ laughter ] "what about ziggy zizaks he's strong on the border, right? florida governor ron desantis over the weekend announced that about 200 floridians were evacuated from israel and landed in tampa, marking the first time in recorded history that anyone was happy to land in tampa [ light laughter ] "eh. oh, maybe we'll meet tom brady!" "what? retire?" in a post today on truth social, former president trump said that ohio congressman jim jordan will be a

meyers >> seth: good evening.eth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden yesterday announced an additional $200 million in funds for ukraine, which is great. but it's not enough money to fight a war. it's barely enough money to make a movie about a war. [ laughter ] that's right, ukrainian president zelenskyy spoke with lawmakers yesterday on capitol hill and said, keep your weapons, just give me this guy [ laughter ] president biden has reportedly told confidants that he feels guilty about his son hunter's legal issues and feels that hunter wouldn't be facing criminal prosecution if he had not run for president in 2020. hell, with his resume, hunter would be looking at a spot in trump's cabinet. [ laughter ] "secretary of parties. [ laughter ] former president trump is selling pieces of the suit he wore during his mugshot, or for $10, you can just go to a joseph a. bank and get the whole thing. [ laughter ] that's r

meyers >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers.te night. and now, if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden is reportedly considering raising tariffs on some chinese goods biden came up with the idea the moment he realized his fingers were stuck [ laughter ] well, it's our last show of the year, so let's take a minute to look back on all the best moments of 2023. >> rudy giuliani to pay $148 million >> rudy giuliani, $148 million >> rudy giuliani, $148 million >> $148 million. >> $148 million. >> $148 million. >> seth: what a year [ laughter ] florida governor ron desantis yesterday criticized the biblical city of bethlehem and said it was a quote, pig stye and disgrace even worse he did it while caroling [ laughter ] the federal judge ruled yesterday that the two georgia election workers who won $148 million defamation judgment against rudy giuliani may expedite their payout because they have good cause that giuliani might try to avoid paying them. how did they come to that conclusion did they look at any p

meyers [ cheers and applause >> seth: good evening.eth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. now, if you don't mind, we are going to get to the news after new york congressman george santos was expelled from the house of representatives last week, santos told reporters, quote, to hell with this place and left in a black suv. oh, yes. the official exit of hot messes everywhere [ laughter ] >> seth: that's the same way andy dick left every restaurant for six years. that's right george santos was expelled last week from the house. and the sign in front of his office was taken down. no clue why it was up in the first place. [ laughter ] in her new book, former republican wyoming congresswoman liz cheney writes republican representative mark green referred to former president trump as orange jesus. what orange jesus the only way trump is like jesus is they both got other people to write their books for them [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> seth: cheney also writes that former president trump was so depressed after losi

i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well., if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news today was thanksgiving the day we all sit around the table and think, which of these cousins has weed [ laughter ] president biden and his family spent thanksgiving on nantucket at the $39 million home of private equity billionaire david rubenstein and even there, they won't have enough normal chairs for everybody. [ laughter ] today was the macy's thanksgiving day parade which featured 12 marching bands though the moment new yorkers saw them take out instruments, they instinctively put in air pods [ laughter ] that's right today was the macy's thanksgiving day parade. which featured 16 giant character balloons, 700 clowns, and one very lost marathoner [ laughter ] new york mayor adams made a safety announcement yesterday for the thanksgiving day parade where he assured new yorkers where everything was perfectly safe, except his job [ laughter ] target is offering a full thanksgiving meal for $25, including a 10-pound turkey, potatoes

me and colbert, jimmy kimmel, seth meyers, john oliver, and all of the money went to our crews that wereou did one of our show intros >> i did i was asked to contribute an opening and sort of um, utilize my voiceover talents >> jimmy: yeah, thank you. >> to read the intro for the show, which i thought would be the intro for all of the shows [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you for doing that >> you're welcome for the one show that you used it for. >> jimmy: can we play jon's "strike force 5" cameo >> five men, with identical, non-transferable, narrow skills and a ton of free time on their hands now unite. will their efforts be worth more than the sum of their parts or will they turn on each other which, let's be honest, would probably make for a better podcast this is "strike force 5. [ thunderclap >> jimmy: wow. [ cheers and applause >> i would have used it all episodes that's just me >> jimmy: let's talk about your voiceover work 'cause this -- i'm very excited about this >> oh, yes "grimsburg." >> jimmy: this is a new animated project here on fox it's called "grimsburg." it's an animated

it's you and -- right here, you and seth meyers are doing a show together.n: what says vegas at new year's even more than seth meyers and john oliver? in the theater where adele sings. we are the opposite of adele in every possible sense. so yeah, there are going to be some very disappointed adele fans that have made a crucial mistake with the calendar. >> stephen: how is your "rolling in the deep"? >> john: it can't be that bad, right? ♪ she could have had it all! ♪ >> stephen: who's opening for whom? i can't tell from this. who's opening for whom? >> john: it doesn't matter. we have done the beacon together. we have opened for each other. i don't know. we'll toss a coin. >> stephen: do you have much vegas experience? >> john: i've only ever been once before. comedy central, i think it was comedy central had a comedy festival. i went with rob riggle. it's his spiritual home. that's his mecca. that was the first time i'd been to vegas, the first time i gambled. it was like 4:00 in the morning one night, i was sitting in a blackjack table, and mike tyson walk

stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers.

meyers >> seth: good evening. seth meyers, this is "late night. hope you are doing well, and now if you don't mind we are going to get to the news according to the latest numbers president biden has visited new york city 11 times since taking office, that's nothing, trump's been here 11 times in the last month. it's one of those sketches done every time he's here he's like, "can i get one in roller skates? [ laughter ] during an event yesterday in philadelphia president biden appeared to mistakenly refer to the marine one presidential helicopter as quote, air force helicopter one you know what, i don't even think that's a gaffe once you get to a certain age you don't care what stuff is called anymore [ light laughter ] it's the same reason your dad called yellowstone yellow ranch. he doesn't care, he just gets as close as he can and you know what the hell i mean, the one with beth dutton oh, he remembers her name. harvard university announced today president claudine gay will stay at her post following criticism f

featuring the 8g band with marcus gilmore ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers

featuring the 8g band with brian frasier-moore. ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth:ening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news while speaking yesterday at the white house's tribal summit, president biden discussed his high school football career and claimed to have been the runner up in the state scoring championship well, i don't know how to tell you this, but runner up isn't good enough! [ laughter ] the republican national committee held its fourth and final presidential debate last night in alabama and based on what i saw, here are my predictions fox news morning show, couple books nobody will read, "dancing with the stars," steps in a bucket and the bucket gets stuck on his foot and he falls off the porch. [ laughter and applause during last night's republican debate entrepreneur vivek ramaswamy expressed support for several conspiracy theories, including the far out idea that will vivek ramaswamy could become president [ laughter ] house republicans yesterday rejected

meyers >> seth: good evening. seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden attended a campaign fundraiser today in boston titled "you've got a friend in joe," which featured a performance by james taylor. so if he wasn't sleepy joe before, he is now. [ laughter ] former president trump on sunday attacked actor robert de niro for criticizing him in a recent awards speech and said, quote, "very much like crooked joe biden, he can't put two sentences together." as opposed to trump, who is about to put four sentences together [ laughter and applause that's right trump attacked robert de niro for criticizing him in a recent awards speech, but he's just jealous because de niro's casino was successful [ laughter ] the republican national committee is set to hold the fourth presidential primary debate tomorrow, which will be hosted by cable channel news nation, the conservative political journal "the washington free beacon," "the meg

featuring the 8g band with marcus gilmore ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: goodi'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope everybody is doing well. and now if you don't mind we're going to get to the news hunter biden spoke outside the u.s. capitol yesterday and criticized republicans for ridiculing his struggle with addiction. unfortunately, when it comes to hunter biden, republicans are also struggling with addiction [ laughter ] that's right, hunter biden spoke to reporters yesterday and said that his father was, quote, "not financially involved" in any of his business ventures. well, i believe that he seems like the kind of dad who wouldn't even get involved in your lemonade stand when you were a kid [ laughter ] "you want to sell lemonade, do ya i guess you better get busy planting a lemon tree. [ laughter ] at a rally last night in iowa, former president trump said that he feels mentally sharper now than he was 20 years and added he is a, quote, "much better golfer" than he was 10 or 15 years ago well, that's what four years of uninterrupted practice will

featuring the 8g band with greg clark jr. ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: good. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well tonight. and now if you don't mind, we're gonna get to the news. after the white house announced last week that the construction will resume on the border wall, president biden told reporters, quote, i was told that i had no choice oh, man, i have a bad feeling we're going to find out this was all the work of one really good telemarketer [ laughter ] "they said if i build a border wall i get three months of spectrum internet. i had to do it.' according to a new analysis, over one third of supreme court decisions are decided unanimously. the other two thirds are decided by whoever took clarence thomas on his last vacation [ laughter ] the irs last week placed a lien on a florida property owned by rudy giuliani. i'm guessing the haunted mansion? [ laughter ] "it's all yours. those ghosts won't let me sleep. [ laughter ] after leaving the white house, former president trump reportedly shared details about the capabilities o

i'm seth meyers. this is "late night.doing well, and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news well, after marrying his cousin, giving a press conference at a landscaping company and almost masturbating in the "borat" movie -- [ laughter ] -- rudy giuliani has finally slipped up [ laughter ] that's right a jury in washington, d.c. last week ordered rudy giuliani to pay nearly $150 million in the defamation case brought against him by two georgia election workers. okay, but he for sure doesn't have that much money [ laughter ] you might as well order a dog to drive you to the airport [ laughter ] a lot of stress for the dog, but you're not getting to the airport. [ laughter ] russian president vladimir putin was formally nominated over the weekend to run in the 2024 presidential election said putin, "if anyone has any questions, my window is always open." [ laughter ] he's prone to defenestration [ laughter ] in a new interview, presidential hopeful robert f. kennedy jr says that he thinks people should be able

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. >>> gavin newsom once again in the spotlight on "late night with seth meyers."spoke about san francisco over creating new housing. there is a focus on the wrongs in the city in order for conservatives to make right. he acknowledges san francisco's problems are very real and apparent to everyone have saiding the city. newsom said he is addressing some of the problems, having the, and he also threatened to take court. >> i'm suing cities. we did an audit and they're conforming to state law for the first time and finally addressing the housing crisis. it's the original sin in california, affordability and none more, cute than the issues you see on the streets and sidewalks. >> governor newsom talked about high-speed rail delays saying it is a major project. newsom again insisted he is not running for president. >>> bay area air quality leaders are reporting another strong odor in the same area where a stench last week frustrate residents. it was in hydrogen levels that a wades water treatment plans. the operator said it was due to a construction project involving a

thank you for watching stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers.

meyers.ndo las reformas de salud mental más significativas del país. bueno, con 221 votos a favor y 212 en contra, la cámara de representantes aprobó una resolución de investigación para un juicio contra el presidente biden. esto luego de 3 meses donde legisladores republicanos iniciaron una investigación enfocada en los negocios de la familia del mandatario, alegando sin pruebas que ellos utilizan la fuerza utilizada. la influencia del presidente biden para lucrarse. por su parte, la casa blanca indicó que los republicanos pierden el tiempo en una maniobra política y sin fundamento. y si usted es de las personas que se preguntan cómo trabaja el envío en la compañía amazon valeska gil tuvo la oportunidad de ingresar en ese centro de distribución para mostrarnos cómo es que funciona el servicio. vea qué tal, cómo están. >> nos encontramos en una de las inmediaciones de amazon más nuevas del mismo día de entrega, así como lo oyen, justo a tiempo para la temporada festiva. cuando los clientes co

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