hello yes, it's me, i have some business, maybe this time without me. well, the brazier is working always help, please, if you are in a hurry, of course, thank you. i'm chasing my love , she's chasing fish. in general, expensive

the smell of women come, and health is not restored. here is the suitability of the armenian nose. the knife falls like this. hello hello can you have pancakes alone? of course, thanks.

my grandmother used to make these when i was little. you know, such thin ones, just like that, my mother also tried to cook, but they, of course, are not worked out. it's just grandma's. something is wrong. understood.

nothing shield, mom will listen ksyusha and you will not mind if we come to visit you?

i'm leaving, you were right, you know? what is the word longing? only in russian they have a breast of sadness, and longing is only ours. why are you with me? i can't go there yet. and then there is no longer there, no one is left. no one here you.

julia realized far away that it was not about the fish. i love you, i will arrive tomorrow on the next flight. yul i really want. meet your grandmother i really want to eat this fish, fish, do you hear? give it to grandma. thanks for the granddaughter.

why do you need fireworks? well, what kind of fireworks is boring? what kind of people are we, we left russia? she is not one of us. and the giraffe will not leave. you return to your homeland. look around. it's good that you

are not bound by anyone. it's good to love to death. nobody in the world owes you. how good is hurrying home? catch yourself in words that are not frank and suddenly understand. how slowly does the soul take care of new changes? what does the homeland begin with? pictures of your primer good for you

grandma thanks grandfather came, but i promised, the kid said.

what happened to this family does not fit into the usual stereotypes. julia is married. for many years, the couple dreamed of children, but a serious health problem left them practically no chance. the doctors' verdict was disappointing, either adoption or surrogacy, which yulia and her husband could not afford, saved by their mother yulia elena at 54 years old. she became a surrogate mother of her own grandson, bearing and giving birth to a wonderful boy, kirill alone with everyone elena snegur and her daughter julia sokolova hello

dear julia elena is glad to welcome you to our studio and would like to thank you for the fact that, in general, you decided and shared with us such an unusual case, but i understand that up to a certain point you are not to hide it, but not to advertise it too much, as if the situation that arose in your big family. we didn't hide. we are just those who were interested, he knew. uh-huh those who were not interested, of course, didn’t go to me, and well, they didn’t shout at every corner that we have such situation and mother. we have a child with us. uh-huh and that's why, in fact, such a decision was made. it was an exclusively financial issue that could not be resolved in any other way. this problem was mom's suggestion, look, how do you like that? in general, it occurred to me, and then it was unknown to offer myself as, so to speak, a surrogate mother for my own grandson or granddaughter. well looking at how they want kids. and

you know that i have health and i bore my children without problems. i thought that i could you know, you know, there are very different impressions, so to speak, but we are of age, i think there is some kind. well, i don’t know, there is an unspoken threshold, after which the idea is fixed in our society, well, where to give birth? as they say, well, it's too late. and you were so sure, you were 54 years old. in this form, the replanting was another 53, she gave birth already, 54. where did the confidence come from. well, i don’t know, probably, there was uncertainty. vera vera yes , that everything will work out yul and how long you tried, so to speak, to carry out your attempts become a mother for 3 years, but very intensively, let's say, yes. and the idea of ​​adoption in your family, so to speak, was it discussed or not? it was discussed when we went to the school of adoptive parents.

we collected documents. so far, we have agreed that we will adopt anyway. uh-huh that is, now kirill will just grow up and, well, at two years old, when he will be, we will already look for and collect back documents for the adoption of a girl already. why didn't you resist then? let's say mom's proposal, all the same? you too you did you think it wouldn't work, or what? here, at the age of 53, mom, you agreed when mom said, let's try this so that mom lags behind and what or uh, no matter how much i didn’t have vera at first when i was the first. he is a transplant, well, i think they will put my mother in jail, how would mom if it’s good there, then well, let it be good, it would all end again. and if it doesn’t work out, maybe mom, as it were, would decrease, that, well, how would she stop offering , she’ll stop having such an idea, but you didn’t scare yourself that mom was still be healthy, the most

a great fear that the mother will not withstand the body. yes , that’s it, that’s why i refused, that’s why i wasn’t very much for this idea, but then, when the embryo had already taken root, there was already a very big fear for eight months for the health of the mother and for the health of the baby. hmm well, we survived. damn, didn't you have fear? for some reason, i never even thought that something could be wrong with me . no, there was absolutely no fear, i had a fear for the child, so that only everything would be fine, so that he would develop correctly in a timely manner, the only thing i was afraid of. here, so that everything is fine, and i take an analysis every month every week, and every month there are others. well, every month i went for an ultrasound. i did an ultrasound . yeah, everything was fine, a week passed. i

again began to worry again, then i waited another two weeks and again went for an ultrasound so that only as soon as they told me . well, everything is fine here, everything is fine. it was easy for me again. yeah, mentally it was hard. but you know, in principle, it seems to me, there is a topic of surrogacy and motherhood. she. well, not so long ago i entered, so to speak, into discussion in our society is another such stereotype that, well, people resort to it, but there i don’t know broad views. rich people, perhaps, who cannot solve their problems there otherwise; in general, there are still many prejudices. and hmm , just like that among the people you have a small town. you didn’t fear that the information that you were carrying, so to speak, a grandson. well, it will somehow be subjected to some kind of moral pressure, including some kind. will you subject something? of course it's me i was ashamed of my state of being pregnant. i was shy. well, what do people think i am for myself, and if

, well, someone met, i immediately explained that it was for my daughter. this is not for me. this is not my stomach, as it were, yes, but this is actually my daughter's life. but in principle, as i know, we now have some restrictions that surrogate mothers can become so an outsider under 35 years old, for your sake they made some kind of exception. well, when the conversation came up about what i want, yulia agreed, i called the center and the director. hey, head doctor. she explained to me that 35 years is the ceiling, but i asked i never got sick. i had no problems as a woman. maybe, let's try, then, she said, well, as an exception, we can if you let your health, i started drinking hormonal, which provoked hyperplasia, vitamin and a little bit. of course, i had two more minor surgeries. yeah. then,

in october, they already gave me the first injection, when the medications started, when all these people started like that. preparatory activities none desires to say so, well, or there thoughts suddenly that oh , something i seem to have overestimated my strength. no, i didn't hesitate to help. let's listen now. it was just your personal doctor yulia mikhailovna that she told us. when elena appeared and, let’s say, put forward her candidacy for the role of a surrogate mother, of course, they were skeptical about this and, one might say, reluctantly, they considered her candidacy, because the age of pregnancy. this is such a kind of health test, even if a person is healthy, here without pregnancy, then during pregnancy , various complications can occur, the body can fail, and at the age of 50 years and above, of

course, these risks are very high, given that she is her age at the time of pregnancy. you are already 53 years old, even if she is absolutely healthy according to the results of the examination. there are still cardiovascular risks, that is, during pregnancy, problems of the cardiovascular system can occur. an exception was made here, because here, probably, see or do not use. why was it done? well, if she was frightened, even for a minute she expressed some doubt that but what if something would be bad with me there, or what? i would immediately refuse, we took a kind of risk, so to speak, took responsibility for this particular patient, because the cases are exceptional and they had no other choice to learn that they

could not afford commercial surrogate motherhood. we went for it, but that's how they will come to us. tomorrow they will say. here i want i want i want. no, of course, we don’t do this yul, well, here, we are all talking about you in the sense of how you reacted to this, and how did you relate to the male, when you said, you know, here my mother wants to give birth for we wanted children so much that he said, if she can, if she really wants to, then let her try, if god wills, then it will be, and your newly-born spouse, who not so long ago you are married and happily married. but in general, he always supported this idea, as it were. there i had to liquefy blood. he rode and collected 20-30 liters of birch sap,

brought it and froze it. here, so that the blood does not thicken, it was necessary so for health, then here it is. it was he who helped the pregnancy a lot. why is it morally that some folk remedies that could help mom hmm carrying a pregnancy, he is the whole thing. all that he could, he did all the number one remedy for the pain of spasm and inflammation with periodic female headaches and other types of pain. penkin will do without pain in sberbank presents the lowest loan rate over the past 10 years. from four and nine percent apply for a loan at a branch or sberbank online and find out the solution in a couple of minutes sberbank is obviously profitable, many are trying to unravel the secret of this taste. it seems that we

succeeded try chernogolovka natural taste of cola that this is a gift i have another draw from our brother. i know there is a spider. he will run over my hand. and you will laugh. no, it’s just a smartphone and with a discount of up to 7,500 rubles. when connecting to mts, there is a big sale on yandex.market buy dishwasher capsules tablets finish 100 pieces for 1.000 390 rubles. only in a tasty and point beneficial for the owners of the new banking ozone card, millions of goods at discounted prices every day. open ozone card for free in the application and get additional service discounts 0 rub. against pain, there is

askofen p, pain reliever with paracetamol at an affordable price, and askofen ultra enhanced composition to combat migraine and other types of pain. by the way, meet my new partner. i want to quickly switch to megafon, the number one operator in terms of internet speed and coverage. megafon i'm sorry, but you pay for processing. it's easier to find out on avito after all, we collect real reviews about employers. now many are putting life on pause due to rising prices with sovcombank credit, make important purchases at today's prices and turn all your plans back on. people are more important many

are trying to unravel the secret of this taste turned out. well, like a family line just for you and me , please your loved ones with mts smartphones at a discount of up to 7,500 rubles. when connecting to mts, this is my assistant. it is like a family to me, without treatment, the fungus progresses, mycoderil solution helps to

destroy nail fungus with the base nozzle treatment it has become even more convenient up to 28% more profitable than the european analogue to fight the fungus with scientific mycoryl. be sure that with a credit savings card you have the most favorable conditions for 120 days without interest. free maintenance forever rate from nine and eight percent. apply online or at a branch for the best credit supercard in the country. at 54, elena endured and gave birth to her own grandson, looking at how they want children and you know that i bore my children without problems. i thought that i could before becoming a surrogate mother. barely did not have to prepare for a long time and a little bit. of course, i brought two more operations small, that their child

would be born in such an unusual way , he wanted children so much that he said, if she can, if she really wants to, then hmm let them try alone with everyone elena snegur and her daughter yulia sokolova and len, i know that there is also a brother yulia has your son and he has some health problems with joints. and before the program, you told us that if i could give away my joints there, if only my son had everything. everything is fine. i would give. here is some kind of, uh, maternal sacrifice. i would say some, in which that's all that is possible right up to enduring a grandson. come on, give the joint. you are already ready , it is clear that there is such a thing. well, what a common phrase, or something, that the mother is ready, there in the life of her child to give. and this is true, it is, as it were, a maternal incident, it is the strongest, but

still, it’s not too much to be ready to sacrifice to such an extent. all for the sake of their children. i don't know. i think, probably, any mother would go for it. that is, you feel your duty. yes, i owe, if i can, i owe everything i can. and how did you meet your husband, how did we meet? well, we met a long time ago in 1974. it's been 42 years already. yes, we went to school together. classmates in the same class. yes, then in the tenth grade i left this city and went to my grandmother in another city to live in the world, and 10. i no longer studied with my class and at yulia's graduation when his daughter also studied with yulia in

parallel classes. and then on social media. when he registered, we also began to correspond with him. and he admitted to me that he kind of had a crush in childhood. we even wanted him with a classmate with my one e with one woman wanted to marry. yes you were free are also needed. so we wanted to introduce him, but he refused. he wrote to me. no, i'll be waiting for you then, so i thought about parting with my husband, with whom the desire is very, of course, by that time it's good and it turns out. as a matter of fact, you know that you refute the saying that at the age of 40

your life only begins, it somehow after 50 ran on all counts. anyway, well, you are some kind of a brave woman, you are sitting such a modest mouse, in general, courage is a car for you. let's listen now. how did they react to your decision. uh, your, your loved ones, your spouse, your close friend, and your mom. as a matter of fact, there are also other people who react. what is special about the members. this is generally a wonderful person. she is quite. i think she was made for family life. i saw responsibility in this person when she informed me of this in her desire to help her daughter. of course i was shocked. 54 years old is a serious age to carry a child. besides

that, she had other concerns. her son denis underwent several operations. it was pointless to dissuade her, of course, she lasted with these emotions. she says i understood intellectually. that i should give this child away, it's not my child, but my heart didn't let go, because in fact, you know, she even talked to him, she learned to talk to him when he was still in general, yes, yes, here, like my grandmother's mother. she put her hand on her stomach and somehow patted him a little, and he reacted to these claps. for us it was of course, well, in general, not

quite usual. we have seen not seen with our own eyes. yes, of course, you are risky when you sometimes watch on tv. how many different cases are there? what dies or the mother's child? and this is what i was afraid of all the time. here she is for you, who is the heroine of the victim, who is lena for you ? okay okay. it all worked out for them. she was seen lying in it, how to say for the preservation. here he is constantly taking some drugs. that's it. it's what's for sometimes for health, is it not good? mom, in fact, your grandmother, your mother’s mother,

naturally, also experiencing her own maternal instinct in her turn, was worried that, thank god, everything ended well, but it could end and not very good could be. you didn't think about what it is, well, selfish enough. in general, a relationship of willingness, mom, who says. but let me help you, maybe i should have insisted that well now, of course, some hypotheses, because fame god, there is zhi-healthy, wonderful kirill was born to his mother in perfect order, beauty. how much kirill is now 3 months 5 months. this is what a woman looks like after giving birth to a 54-year-old child. it did not think that well, maybe somehow i went over somehow with the readiness of my mother. well, mom is ready, but am i ready to risk her health like that. i was not ready, initially i and the decision that we made, that yes, mom will give a boost in january, when kirill was put on, he

succeeded very difficult with tears in his eyes, but mom i called you decided. well, here, i can i feel that i can consult with my husband. my husband speaks. well, what are you, what are you so worried about? i say, well, what if it’s scary to lose embryos already. we can lose our mother there, anything can happen. he well, if mom says so wants an attempt and torture. well, how would he support me. well , not just what he supported, he prompted me to say something, yes, but well, it was still very difficult and i didn’t fully realize and didn’t think that how everything would turn out, the embryos would take root, that my mother will have to give birth to len, how did you feel? how is the pregnancy going? i was ready for everything, and

therefore for me, i almost now think that i easily brought this pregnancy to me. i didn’t have any toxicosis, both with my children and with kirusha, toxicosis and there was nothing. the only thing that has been hard for me lately is to walk for a long time. well, if we talk about the moral side , there are difficulties, so to speak, physiological ones that you somehow overcame with the help of medicine, so to speak different modern e means, but this hmm how to say, it seems to me, after all, the lord god also put this mechanism in us, that when we take women not for them, then this connection with the child somehow stops. and how is it to understand that this is not my child, that is. like you are mine, but he is actually my daughter and actually i have to give him away and actually, that's how you talked about, patting your tummy about. i spoke to him right away. now, when it was already more than 20 weeks, when there were already movements, uh,

i woke up and said, kiryushenka well kiryushenka baby, i said to the toilet, baby, well, i get up, we will get up, and he somehow moved like this. i was at ease with him. everything is fine. what to give to yulia. uh, well this is also with his wife and grandson, so love for his daughter. eh, there was no doubt that i was carrying a grandson and i would give my daughter so that she would be happy, but when i saw kirill in the hospital, i, of course, had something motherly about me. played right away. i was very worried. how will i part with him, but this is for her, as until now i understand that this is for her, as a big part, as a son. and secondly, as a grandson, she loves him very much. she is very attached to him.

yeah, you didn’t expect this, when you went to this experiment, so to speak, you didn’t expect it. but, when i saw what it was like after birth, when i was still walking, my mother, pregnant, i saw how she treated me, i realized that it would be hard to part with him even after especially after resuscitation, when we were in intensive care . it became even more difficult for my mother. it was visible and noticeable some, in general, a burden on your soul. the decision to risk her mother's health was very difficult for yulia, her husband says, what are you doing, why are you so worried? i say, well, suddenly it's scary already. we can lose embryos, we can lose our mother, anything can happen there, despite the fact that elena was carrying a grandson, she treated him like her own child, when it was already more than 20 weeks, when

there were already movements, uh, i woke up and she said, baby, well, that i’m getting up, we’ll get up, and he somehow moved like this. i was calm with him. everything is fine. julia saw the experiences of her mother and felt her connection with the child, i still understand that this is for her, as a big part, as a son. secondly, as a grandson, she loves him very much. she is very attached to him. alone with everyone, elena snegur, and her daughter yulia sokolova lena went through childbirth like a mouth, they planned yes in advance well in advance, as i am of a gray section. it is always at 38 weeks. and so i carried it to 38 weeks and arrived for a planned caesarean. you also went to ufa, yulia didn’t, they took you her. but she herself did not let us in, they said that it was

impossible. why yes, well, you can’t, they don’t have it. in this hospital, in their practice, there are no partnerships of partner deliveries, so there is none. and where were you , we were at home, sitting on pins and needles all this time, until my mother called and said you became parents. and when the caesarean section took place, were you conscious or not? that is, you saw immediately. yes, they did not do the final anesthesia. i heard a child. i heard him screaming, i even heard it. what he thought he was in stomach screaming began to scream so such a muffled sound was uh, voice voice, then stronger and then they took him away. uh, to another room, they showed him everything, as it should be or not. they didn't show it to me. they didn't say that, look. here is the boy. no. although i was conscious. i

thought everything was as it should be. i thought so. so they took him to another room. people from the children's department were already waiting there. the doctors took him to the children's department, it turns out to be in intensive care. why did they bring babies to everyone in the evening? well i have me in the resuscitation unit also remained in its adult vo- well , they brought the children to some, they show me, but they don’t bring me in the morning again, they bring me again to others. i already asked a question. why i don't have a child does not show. e, with and a doctor will come to you, he will tell you everything, i began to worry. yes, i've gone crazy. i think so now, yes, then they told me he was in intensive care. hey, you can call there. i called and they told me the child was not breathing on his own, that he was developing pneumonia. well, then, of course, i already

had a tantrum in general. yulia how did you find out about the fact that kirill was in intensive care mom called, she said we talked the night before and everything was fine with the child. everything is fine. all is well with me. uh, the child is no longer allowed, they are not allowed. mom is also in intensive care; she also does not know what is happening with the child. but everything seemed to be fine. but in the morning, uh, my mother called us and said that kirill turned out to be in intensive care with pneumonia. ugh, that's not so good. as i would like, as yesterday assumed. there have already begun hmm attempts to make and in intensive care. started call every day there, you know? what every hour, if you call it will be useless and only doctors divert from their duties. to reassure mom,

because mom just felt very at that moment that her mother had changed her attitude, or something to the child, that for a long time there the mind tried to control feelings, and she said. here is my grandson. this is for your son, and so on and so forth, and that at the moment when the child was born, that, in fact, the concept was mixed up. and what is it that she is not very able to distinguish, is it well or this is still my child thinks, she m-m it was clear when it became obvious, when we ran into her in the very intensive care unit near kirill. for the first time they let me in kirill. and uh, i saw him, and my mother already, in my opinion, came up for the third time. it was then that i saw mom’s attitude towards the child, how she stood crying, how she was shaking, and i understood that it would be very difficult for mother to mother without kirill and i would give him and her more than more sensitive than grandmother grandson. and what did you experience with these kirish? this is

my child. all i have will be no thoughts was. he will not recover. everything is fine. eh, they do everything to make it all right. this is my child, and you cried. i am such a person, i very, very rarely cry from emotions, a little emotional, especially in those when there is a person nearby who is also feeling bad. yeah, seeing my tears. he will be even worse, so we must hold on. well, thank god. this is history. eh, lenochka, you cry all the time. these are tears of happiness, or or memories and happiness, that everything is so honest, thank god everything ended well, really, and here is kirill's mother. earlier, lena was discharged than kirill or both. and that is, you still continued to walk, kirishi to drive there sterlitamak there is 120 km. wow, that is, not every day there is every other

day. and when i was discharged, it was something like me on the day of discharge. in general, i was waiting there, for a whole week, how long i lay, i was all flowing, and when they were discharged, i say, why? well, because they were afraid, no, kirill is that he is sick, yes, that he was afraid and when he was discharged. i think how can he be left such a tiny tiny one in this maternity hospital. i didn't realize it was for me at all there was something he came the moment. i had to leave the maternity hospital, and we yulia came for me, and we immediately went to church from the maternity hospital, wept and asked , then we asked everyone at each room there , they begged that everything was there, so that they could recover with kirusha and help. well, after what time kiryushka was discharged, first he was discharged to study

on the 12th day on the fourteenth day for 2 weeks, and then for another week we lay with him in the children's department for the second stage, also courtship. kirill and i aga were already lying, yes, and you were waiting. yes i already waited. i already called her too. she sent me pictures. and how did you decide among yourselves, who will lie with kirusha, when when i pull out mom, you have a birth certificate, as if a mother with a child lies aha that is, there was no legal possibility. eh, lenochka, if there was a legal possibility, would you run ahead of the curve together? well, that is, when they took kirill from the hospital, they met you uh-huh, as expected, yes, with flowers and my mother met, right? it was a strange feeling. no, i was glad that kirill recovered. and that he and yulia well, everything is strange, no, there was no strange feeling. no. i knew it was her

child. and that they should meet her, yul, and when you felt, i don’t know somehow, that maternal feelings immediately turn out right away m-m. i did not think that if i have a maternal instinct, no, he swears maternal instinct. i just knew. this is my child. i will live with him for a very long time. i already love him. i am boundless man to him tenderness. i am responsible for his life. yes, without this man. i can't anymore because it's mine. and he how he reacted to you, kirill, he looked at me for the first time, as if another nurse with one eye did not say that there were just some people around him at once. at first there were a lot of people. and when he saw me, i was just another face for him, which maybe he won’t

see again . damn, when did we ask you. uh, hmm getting ready for this program. would you go for this experiment again? they said, perhaps yes, but i would not be able to give it back. so said. breaking up is very difficult. this is something that was the most difficult parting for you lena what did you think? what would be bad without you? yes, and it seemed to me that he felt better with me, that he seemed to feel that i was betraying him, that i was giving and betraying him. well, that's what he don't know, that's how i felt. i even when they left,

and we had an agreement with yulia. they traveled for three days, but murmansk that every 3 hours she tells me how kirill's condition is, and here's some moment here in my head, uh, crying baby. so i hear the cry of a child, i call them, and the truth is, kirill is crying. there was some kind of connection with him, then it was very difficult to leave. and let us know that now we will listen to the professor of neonatology, they are grigor filippova. and what did she tell us, but told about your specific situation and about the maternal surrogate in general. if we talk about what happens in psychological practice, then this is not the most shocking story, but in fact, from the point of view of the arrangement of family roles and the formation the personality of a child is, of course, a very difficult story, because a certain family role, who is my mother, who is my father, who is my grandmother, this helps

a person to build his own concept of self, to define himself as a person of a certain gender, to master the role in the family that i have should be in this case, since we are still talking about a boy, it will be a little easier for him, because girls also need to master the maternal position, and in such a generally mixed story. it's not just the boy here, at least one single father, and as an object with which one will have to compare oneself, there is such a concept of psychology, identification, he is precisely defined for him, but about how he will then figure out how to choose a woman for him, here they can there may be different interesting stories, because, in principle, the mother figure plays a big role here, but now this child has two mother figures. and, probably, the whole problem here is how they will play these roles among themselves, and how they will distribute themselves

position in relation to the child. we , for example, psychology know quite a lot of examples when these roles are confused. and the game. this inside the family is called so, who is the best mother for this child and can fight for this role, mother and grandmother, mother, and even there father and aunt, someone else would be nice if there was help from a psychologist who would help them put all the roles on this grandmother's place is to accept what she did and, as it were, put an end to it. then say, well, that's it, i'm a grandmother. i give all the rights go to this mine position and i will study there to be a grandmother so that it was not just easy, but such a grateful parting with a sense of accomplishment of a job well done, gratitude to the parents who take this child and bring them to them for the child. it matters a lot when a mother separates from her child. so , with anxiety with feelings with tears,

this just speaks of that very internal conflict that she is not ready to let him go. now give other hands when we talk at all surrogacy about iconosloque motherhood, we always recommend to parents that their children are aware of the status of their birth. as far as i know, you didn't really intend to hide from kirill how he was born. and how are you? it would be explained to him, there is such a thing when children from the age of five ask. yes, you gave birth to me. no, not me who gave birth to him. here is your grandmother. why didn't she give birth? well, in my house, where children grow up, there are not very good ones, you wouldn’t like it there, this explanation is enough. it seems to me at the level of this age, when he starts asking such questions and

this information is enough for him, and then it’s like it won’t happen when he grows up, that you’ve been deceiving me all your life, that you gave birth to me, it turns out you gave birth i'm a grandmother, and everything in my life was a deception, and so on and so forth, so let's not hide. hmm. let's start asking questions, we will answer, but somehow at first with children's fairy tales, but we will not affirm and deceive the child. against pain in muscles and joints in it is the most a high dosage of a substance for pain and inflammation and a special component for better penetration into the ochakovel was created to combat pain, inflammation in the muscles and joints

. apply for a loan at a branch or sberbank online and find out the solution in a couple of minutes sberbank is obviously profitable. many are trying to unravel the secret of this taste, it seems that we succeeded try chernogolovka natural taste cola excuse me, it's easier to find out on avito after all, we collect real reviews about employers up to

7,500 rubles. when connecting a connection to the mts deposit at a favorable rate of 8% per annum, this is a discovery. you and i are glorious closer to the dream in the new dream lottery super prize from 100 million rubles. from the national lottery. me happiness, choose

indylight helps to cope with pain sokolov is already at wellds. now many are putting life on pause due to rising prices with with a loan from sovcombank, make important purchases at today's prices and turn back on all your plans sovcombank people are more important at an attractive price only in delicious and point this and many other cars can only be seen on avito look for ads marked only on avito many are trying to unravel the secret of this taste. it seems that we succeeded try chernogolovka natural taste of cola viruses were prepared for a cold, and

temperature and the fight against viruses. i choose ergoferon, it combines several effects fighting viruses eliminating symptoms. arvi removal of inflammation, and also suitable for children are colds, viruses of the season. remember ergoferon, the largest bank offers a guaranteed favorable rate on a loan and does not matter at the post bank. you are waiting for annual guaranteed. it was hard for elena to come to terms with the idea that this was not her child, when i ran to the intensive care unit, i ran away from my adult intensive care unit. that's when i'm mine. why why did this happen? why did i try so hard? this is how julia understood it, how difficult will be the separation of mother and baby video mom's relationship to somehow she stood

crying, how she was shaking. i understood that it would be very difficult for m-mother without seryozha and i would give him and she more than more feelings than grandmother's grandson in the future, yulia plans to tell her son the whole truth. about his birth. children from the age of five ask there. well, you are my mother there you gave birth to me. no, not me who gave birth to him. here is your grandmother alone with everyone elena snegur and her daughter yulia sokolova i also wanted to ask you yulia, you know when children are born, and of course our parents, there they always feel us as their own children, and there, no, no. and no matter how old we are, they try to educate us to express. we do it this way or not, we do it and when our children are born in the next generation. i mean, then, after all, parental care, and our children are transferred to him, they begin to tell him this way or not, do you absorb you correctly or incorrectly? it

's just that or you feed your own child. and in general, every mom, dad has an iron answer. uh, if you don't want to pay or get involved you say so stop. you raised me, thank you very much. now. this is my child and i will do as i see fit. here is your situation. it seems to me quite difficult to object to your mother and say that i will do it the way i see fit, because we do it the way it is, as it were, and mother is trying to interfere. somehow especially. no, it's not necessary to give kirill, or that's it. well, no matter how other aspects you take it wrong. you don't like it put put. so he probably doesn't hurt. everything is fine. mom is fine, he's fine. and no one offends you. what if you offend him, there is such a thing as an addition offend, kirill. there was such a feeling, i thought, so that suddenly they offend him there, but how can they

offend him? it's interesting just like that. i kind of, well, because you stayed there like that, i thought that he was better with me what i feel, that you could somehow do it better than these completely young worthless inexperienced parents, and here is the question of such parental sacrifice, which hmm which is often a well-known case that when there parents, for example, can say to their child. i sacrificed my career there for you and the child will feel in general, but always in an indebted debt to his own parents. but the sacrifice that went, my mother somehow. well, now, if her health and even this moral torment that she experiences after parting with kirill does not impose some kind of additional such responsibility and the feeling that, well, this is some kind of unpaid debt and such. here are even some connectedness in their own actions in

relation to their son. well, the debt, and the one that i must now justify mom’s mother’s such a sacrifice, that kirill should grow up with us as a very wonderful good person and raise him well, and in front of my mother that this is the best thing in the world for me, mom and now with no one can argue with that. i love him very much, i respect him. and i am eternally grateful to her for being did for me. and your husband, as he expressed his gratitude to his mother-in-law, he loves her very much, he respects her very much, especially for the last year. eh, this is a person who, for him, is probably on such a pedestal, which you can’t say anything against at all. here, no matter how bad it is, or even

look at it in this direction with some kind of negative there, because this is sacred to him. this holy woman is bound. i have to say that i have the most wonderful mother-in-law in the world. she's just a super copper woman who gave me a son and all some other questions and this is useless. now you will especially quarrel with your mother, you won’t even be able to in the presence of your husband, yes, that is, it will always be on the side of your mother. yes, most likely so kirill you came with you. i wanted to ask permission so. can we bring him here to us? can he like to watch people? now we will wait for him to be carried. hello kiryuha hello, such a little man

hello interesting, he is quite enough here. and a lot of people fantastic, to what extent calmly child? and you're not afraid of anything? i know for both of you. now, of course, the most important thing is to keep in touch with each other, and in particular with kiruha, in order to find out how he is doing, how he is growing, do you call up? how often can you have kids every day, but we know that you, uh, don't have smartphones. here, so to speak, only at home. you can use a computer to watch kirills on a daily basis, and we thought that these are such

smartphones. you would be useful in order to any new first tooth smiles could be forwarded as quickly as possible. i do not know the first steps further and everything that will happen with kirill to keep the completely heroic grandmother informed of every event in life, kirill thank you very much. i wish you good luck. thank you we can't help but admire your act and your masculinity and femininity. well, kirusha grow up as a worthy son and grandson, simply the most worthy that can be, thank you very much. now

he is a successful photographer, professional skier and a happy person, but everything could have turned out quite differently 8 years ago, life subjected him to a difficult test, while climbing elbrus, he stumbled and fell down 2 km. rolled down a rocky slope and survived more than a day. he fought for life, suffered from thirst, lost 10 kg of weight, and stopped feeling his legs. the rescue operation lasted more than 10 hours, and that's it. this time did not leave him. hope legs could not be saved. and it radically changed his life, and for the better. now he continues to go to the mountains, professionally engaged in skiing life on prostheses. taught him the basics. never give up and always go to the intended goal, not

paying attention to the obstacle. alone with everyone skier, mountaineer and photographer sergey alexandrov hello glad. you are welcomed in our studio you know me always i am very interested in people who, uh, some from a general point of view, but interpret misfortunes as a new impetus to life. but you are almost a gift. i would even say fate. why don't i know how to answer this question. this is by far the most difficult question. although he probably expect the thing is that when it happened, yes, uh, well, it was a state of shock. here i am , there without legs with a temperature. i feel very bad. it's physically a complete nightmare. yes, that is, you do not know how to live and you are physically ill, well, in general, everything should collapse and it should have been bad inside. well, that's normal, yes, but that didn't happen to me. i do not know how to explain it. for me.

this is a great gift. this uh, uh, i was already happy, then in a completely terrible state with the most simple things opened a window. i heard the birds there. and i felt good. from this. i was happy. eh, the simplest things. this i regard as a gift, because i do not know the answer. yes, where did it come from and because of what and why? and because well , i'm not something that i didn't deserve. i did n’t do anything for this, because sometimes you find the strength in yourself to pull yourself out of the swamp. there, well, somehow you do something, and it was well, for free, just lucky. it got the feeling of a gift, but you know what i might suspect, maybe because that the chance that you could lose this life is completely and it will also be quite large. maybe this is not a chance. this is a rough statistic - more than 90% in such a situation dies within an hour and a half

, respectively, live 32 hours. it 's a problem and during all these hours, the realization that it's, well, it's like, you'd rather be sent there than stay here and therefore there is that, well, as if the news that there will be an amputation, it did not cause some big problems. i live it. well, the most important thing is that you have gone it, well, i don’t know, call it a tragedy. for me. this is indeed a very big adventure. it sounds completely crazy and well speaking of tragedy, most recently before this injury. i didn't have a mother. that was a real tragedy for me. it's something i can't even explain going through and it's become so serious for me. why did she die so hard. it's cancer and it's scary when your loved one dies. so hard a few years for me was a key issue in understanding the world in an attempt to understand it, yes, in general

, in every every minute, i felt that it was important for me to understand what death is from why it is at all. eh, it was so important. i counted everything that is possible on this topic to understand what death is, what is beyond these limits of the concept , or everything in general, that is, i tried to approach this issue from all sides. well, the most productive way. this is the key to existential psychotherapy. and the idea is that, in general, death does, the very concept of presence in our lives, uh makes our life valuable. ah, when an aunt with a scythe is standing nearby, you begin to understand what is really valuable to you, what is important? and what? well what's the point if she's around as well and for me it was n't a word for a few years it was straight. well, that's the question that was pounding every minute, perhaps that's why i'm there in the woods in the mountains. yes, it’s high and

scary, and in no case was i looking for death, in general i don’t like risk, i can’t stand it. yes, i always buckle up, but beyond the limits. i'm interested in extremely simple a and just this interestingly, that's literally before the ascent. yes , the next morning we were going to elbrus, it was generally a training ascent, we had very serious plans. in the evening, the thought suddenly comes to me that death is insanely interesting. this is the most interesting event that can happen to your life, it, well, sounds crazy, but the point is that, as it were, and at that moment all questions open up. that is, as if everything falls into place, everything is for real. well, uh, you're talking about this uh fall that it happened that, so to speak, elementary attention was needed for that, that is, it was not some kind of extreme extreme extreme. you just caught your foot in there and, as i understand it

, for your own and further, but these seconds of falling flew down. you remember them, yes, very well, and again it's hmm well, i fell for a long time, not a second. yes , it's about 2 km. that is, i flew without a single, not like nadezhda without any, as it were, some kind of ability to cling to this world. that is, it just sausages you, and you twist, and you came such uh, thought and non-thinking. eh, it's very straight forward that i'm not trying. it's like reflecting. it was really there, uh, long-term. i feel it, i realized that eh. well, nothing depends on me anymore. it's a feeling of trust. well, that's how it will stop me, well, thank god it won't stop. well , it's not mine either. it was i who flew in absolutely trusting, because it was not scary around, very scary. this is the ultimate feeling. this is a terrible

fear. ah, there is fear. uh, when you step out of your comfort zone, sleepily speaking, that is, well, and there you are completely lost to this world. it 's very scary anyway. it's not going anywhere and it's not a question. can you overcome this fear? well , live, yes, continue to continue, well, sometimes fear completely fetters. uh, knocking you into a brick. and you turn into nothing. yes, but sometimes you can work in this state. and this is my crazy sport. it helps me. and i am very much, but i'm afraid of it, yes, go to the start. dive into a state of absolute e, not that discomfort, well, fear, but when you succeed there in this zone work. this is very cool. it's really great. this is a huge energy, which there is no limit. let's listen now to your friend dima, who was just with you at that time

in the mountains, who actually made a lot of efforts to save you, remembers this moment. the most difficult moment, then this is just yet. we were still on the slope, and well, i found him. well, when there was a panic, uh, respectively, the panic passes both for me and for him, and then we begin to act, more comrades came up. we brought things. and when already more or less everything. well, the overnight stay was ready, then the mood was better. it remains unknown, only when the rescuers will come, but we were in touch with them, and therefore, uh, well, too. it was obvious that they would come in the morning or a little later. well, after i came to my senses, again, uh, everything was, well, there was not painted in black colors. yes well already thought, how to return to the city. how to arrange life there? well, from

such things, uh, there are. well, yes, we are friends, well, an acquaintance for more than 20 years, probably, and has not changed at all. no, i'll say it was like that mature more seriously and only in this respect he has changed, and his feelings of life and this endless optimism must have remained the same as at 12 years old. and, of course, i don’t perceive seryoga as an invalid and with a limited person with disabilities. it is really impossible to apply the word disabled person to you, your possibilities are not limited. you just do what people don’t do with their legs, so to speak. but you even somehow insist on it. here are your quotes. you say

don't expect me. there are people of the unfortunate invalid in the four years that i live without grandchildren, i visited volcanoes in the mountains of norway, kamchatka, i can walk 10 hours in a row on a slope with a thirty- kilogram backpack. i have space prostheses, german. in short, iron legs are cool. you might think that this is such a self-incantation. here i am disabled. and that's even better. yes, i don’t know, somehow i live with what i have, yes, using the opportunities that there are, it’s all technical difficulties. there are a lot of things in the life of every person. er, well, any technical problems. yeah, i don't know, the sink broke, uh. the disorder is something i have a broken leg disorder, well, the first year and a half. it really hurts, that is, like walking on prostheses. this is tryndets excuse me, especially there for the first time i reached the kitchen. uh, i was drenched in sweat, literally.

hmm oh, well, from pain, and on crutches, but at the same time this disgrace of the last happy, because i can walk. that's all. it's in this nonsense. i can do that, well, it's a matter of training. this is a question. e my efforts. the chances of saving him were negligible, the rough statistics are small more than 90% in such a situation dies within an hour and a half, respectively, live 32 hours. it's a problem. and during all those hours of knowing that it's, well, it's like, you'd rather go there than stay. there are real tragedies here. he considers the death of his mother, she was dying very hard. it's cancer and it's scary when your loved one dies. so hard, he's comfortable with life on prosthetics, because quote you

say, don't expect me. there are people of an unfortunate disabled person, iron legs - that's cool. i live with that there are a lot of technical problems in the life of every person. yes, i don't know, the sink broke. uh, disorder there, my leg broke disorder. life without borders sergey alexandrov has an amazing photo of you right after you were rescued. uh, so the rescuers went down after 32 hours from the mountain 32 hours of waiting. uh, the doctors stated in the hospital. all have lost 10 kg. just for these 20. yes, for these for these 32 hours of waiting. how long the legs are broken irreparable bleeding and so on. here you lie smile, and i saw my friends, that in general it was also an absolutely amazing feeling. i am insanely losing you see, and it was not something that i had to call everything there, but somehow a stump. so i was just very glad to see my

friends. e people who communicated with me there and failed to immediately start a conversation with a living person to me, then e crowds of friends climbed into this same hospital until night, then over the fence. it was cool overall. for some reason, you remember how nika had a special impression when you resuscitation flew a butterfly. well, this is just an example, it’s just, probably, it’s just very beautiful, and i remember that there’s not even a butterfly like that. a dead moth, but for some reason a butterfly appeared. well , yes. well, it's just this, when you're lying animation time, but you don't think so. talkov seems to be like this, but i was really pleased that this world exists in general, and it is so big and beautiful there, that there is something else there, because in the intensive care unit there is an eerie place there, in general, people are constantly dying next to you , then something else. well, there, nightmare's

in general, here and and here is something living wonderful. and these are the little things that made me very happy, and again , you understand, everyone asks me. uh, motivational secret. here, come on, tell me how it is, too . yes, in the same case. well, not in exactly the same way. come on, it's hard, but this is a gift, it's a freebie. i don’t know where it came from, and what it is, well, in my life there was such a very simple plot, but at the same time, for me it is subjectively very valuable almost mystical experience. i used to go to students. but in practice, i was in the mood terrible creepy so disgusting. here you were, there was a well, i wanted to spit such a nasty one all right and it was cold, it was so chilly. and here i am walking and suddenly, uh, suddenly, from behind, as if something is hugging me, it’s kind of warm, i turn around, and there is the sun. it's like it's a gift, when you

don't deserve it for free. do you want like yes? well, a well? yes, and you are hugged by something like that. i must say you have an amazing story. e of your marriage, but because a year before it happened, well, let's call it misfortune. and so, although, this is the case when there was no involvement before the misfortune helped, while you broke up with yours. eh, wife. that is, she was your girlfriend, as i understand it, or either she was not even your girlfriend, or you were an unsuccessful attempt to woo her. well , in short, she was not next to you and just when you were in the hospital here, so she reappeared on the horizon. tell me what it was like, in general it is impossible. yes, that is, it does not fit into any social norms. well, it's just, well, before that we met at all

not for long, we just met and somehow it didn’t work out there. uh, she was there, she had her own problems, she wasn’t up to me at all, and in general, we broke up. and then she found out about me. here is something on the internet somewhere. and just came to the hospital her words. how exactly did she say, because otherwise, well, she didn’t know how to, that is. she just came to regret came. here is the key word. this is the worst. what can be done with a person in such a situation to feel sorry for him, i learned how to become disabled in the head. here e, and she kind of. well, probably not in part, maybe in general, well, as it were, to a greater extent. she saved me from that, you know. lying, you are so helpless, well, really objectively helplessness, really objectively hard and asking, well , someone, but not a glass of water. i'm just this

image. it seems to me very accurate, and naturally, they immediately serve you. well, i'm helping you. here you are lying like this, can i have an egg there something else there pizza there, here, and here with olives, here and here and here and here and here and there chocolate and candy. come on, come on, and then, and then you know what happens at some point, and people are watching, yes, you yourself can reach for a glass and such. well, it’s easier for you to file for me and such an insult arises immediately immediately. here, but this one, well, how am i so unhappy. and you, and you can't give me a glass. here and this ah-ah man turns into a completely monster moment it happens. here is the end result. it turns into a human. he himself is no longer capable of anything, but a terrible resentment for the whole world for his loved ones, constant snot and a complete lack of personal strength.

this is it's scary. it happens very quickly uh-huh that's unfortunately, and polina in plain text. you don't interest me at all. just in a rigid and wheelless form, not only that, she continues to do so. this is very hard for me. i'm not that interested. literally. well, yes, i am , well, how not to say how, maybe, yes, it’s wrong to formulate this here. she feels very subtly when you yourself can, but when you pull someone's strings, you start to pull. she it immediately feels and this thread at once and that's it. that's when you are well, when i was sick, especially after and when i'm tired after training, well, i really want to be looked after there, well, all that. here. unfortunately, this is not about her. no, you see, she is very affectionate

and gentle with me, but this is the case when you yourself have the necessary energy to not be at all and when you lie like a rotten woman, yes, then you don’t expect any help from her and that’s not the same . get up then we'll talk hard, but uh in my case this is exceptionally effective, that is, so you got on your feet and the elections went, it seems that it didn’t happen, right? a year later you, uh, made her a very nice proposal in a balloon at that moment you already had prostheses, right? yeah. although we went for a ride in a wheelchair for half a year, it was terrible. yes, she had to carry it there. and this is very hard. i was in a wheelchair for six months. i even managed, uh, i went to the city center and traveled alone and even found a job for myself, although i had no problems with finances at that moment, my friends are incredible,

helped including money and the first couple of years. i didn't think it was such a problem at all. that's why they are needed for some reason, but i really loved that i didn’t want to and i love photographs. and then, too, i found there on the first floor in the studio, all this was possible, but nevertheless, doing photography even in a wheelchair, but it is very difficult with a wheelchair user. hmm, that is, at first. you thought that now i want to understand development, as it were, when prostheses appeared then. from the very beginning, you thought that there would be prostheses, or did you initially think not well, okay, so you have to get used to the wheelchair of life. i don’t know at what point something happened there, this is from the category of technical solutions. and this big adventure dentures is hmm , that's my very favorite. joke. it's true, the wife joked again, and she keeps complaining that she has one closet with these very things. and i have two legs. that's it. it's really like that, it's

just a blockage, it's for every function for every movement you need new legs. and thanks to my prosthetists. my god, what would he do without them. they are they just don’t come up with anything, but they are for what purposes each leg, but first of all it is for each function, that is, unfortunately, in general, our legs are a unique creation in general and any prostheses. it 's just an attempt to get closer. accordingly, to walk you need one, to walk over rough terrain another, to walk with a load of the third, to run the fourth and for my beloved to ski. this is fundamentally different. and whose idea was to have a wedding anywhere, but in the forest on rough terrain. i don’t remember whose. but of course, polina was worried that i screwed up there. it's just that i'm a very uncomfortable person. i can e live in the forest on

a tree without everything. well, i'm generally fine here, eh. well, a wedding is such an event, when do you need everything to be right? yes, so that people can wear beautiful dresses and shoes, and here is some kind of forest. yes, i was, of course, scared, but i'm a wedding in a restaurant. well i have a lot of videos of weddings in the restaurant. i'm already yes, i'm working. and now i'm tired of seeing. well, anyway, i'm not what to see, i i start working. i come to the restaurant and start working. it was somewhere to escape from this. yes, and in general it was perfect, because we had time to do it. everything was done, yes, that is, we protected ourselves from the rain and from everything that was in your wedding photo on the internet. they are truly extraordinary beauties. i'm insanely sorry that we can't show them in our program, because you forbade us to show your wife, there is such a thing. and what is it is difficult to say, well, firstly, she does not want to. and why, as it were

convince her? this is a completely pointless exercise. yes, you understood that. here, yes, what are you doing? you can do everything there. why doesn't she want to? it's a big load, actually, when well, isn't that what you get recognized for? no, i can probably manage, but it's not just that. hmm, it's like a different world and different energy. things are changing so much and i'm not sure if i can handle it? yes there is yes he is sure that you ask for disabilities in your head, well, give me a glass of water for someone, and of course, they immediately serve you. well, they help you. here you’re lying like that, can i have an egg there , something else there, pizza there, and this one, this one. and this one, and chocolate and candy, and people are watching.

yes, you can reach the glass yourself. how am i so unhappy. and you, and you can't give me a glass. that's when a man turns into a completely monster. sergey has more prostheses than outfits. at his wife. i have a very favorite. joke. it's true, the wife joked again, and she keeps complaining that she has one closet with these very things. i have two with legs for every kind activities. he has a separate pair of legs, to walk you need one, to walk over rough terrain the other, to go out with a load of the third, to run the fourth and for my we to ski. it's fundamentally different life without borders sergei alexandrov have you had a daughter? uh-huh and this uh set some new goals for you. yes, it generally changes everything. the most remarkable thing is that, you know, in childhood, you really love the new year, your birthday. yes, and then you

become old and rotten. and it's like holidays at some point are as easy to set as if you were losing a holiday. well, he, well , he gave a cool birthday there, he called back to everyone there. and when a child appears, everything returns, the magic returns and the new year returns and now i have the opportunity to make a holiday for her, yes, to make joy. it's just incredible i know that you travel a lot, and you travel with your family, including, well , for example, you drive a car. yes, of course, you drove her to no, i didn’t just drive her. oh, actually, i went on a bike. and i went seriously, it was a long time . well, i drove 6-8 thousand kilometers a year. well , yes, it's 50 kilometers a day there. this is approximately the average. well, you got into the car and began to drive it, realizing that you have a responsibility

to the family, because, well, you need a husband, father, somehow, because it is convenient. you once said that at any moment you can say, change, uh, i need to go to the mountains. and what is this place of solitude for you, which is for you, but it is still so, well, at any moment i can’t anymore, because i have a wife and daughter. and this is the basic part of my life, inexchangeable. yeah, i mean, if they're doing well, then i can have fun. well, well, this is so much entertainment or solitude after all, well, look at the mountains in the figures that i walked before the injuries. i don't walk anymore, but it's a very important part for me to find the state when it's so difficult. yes , you are forced. eh, finding in yourself, well, some incredible resources is important to me. i want to search through it, that's probably why i do this completely insane sport

when the injury has already occurred. yes it is. you didn't get very close to them. i didn't know what it was. that is, i, uh, we were engaged in kitur, that is, with a heavy backpack we descended from high mountains. but this is a completely different technique. here, uh, skiing technique is a classic. this is completely different. that is, just when you have already stood up on prostheses, go skiing. it has become a kind of test for you too, will i find more resources in myself? well, in this case, well, this one and this too, but in this case it's also a thrill. so i wanted to return to the topic of the prosthesis, because in fact, now, about the fact that there is a full wardrobe of them there, these are prostheses, well, prostheses, this is not a cheap business, that's what and how. i know at first the prostheses helped you raise money. the fact is that it is not so bad in our kingdom. so, in fact , everyone makes normal prostheses. well, you don’t need to think that a person there must definitely run with an outstretched hand, and so on. all problems are

solvable, sometimes difficult to solve, but they are solvable, and uh, well, uh, a man helped me. he i just have a brick of half a million. yes, here on and, as it were , on prostheses, on which you can immediately walk quickly , well and beautifully, and for a crossed month. and this briquette gave money. i don't know, i'm insanely grateful to him, because then i knew it very well. oh , it was through friends of acquaintances. uh, that's just what a man who knew what to eat. trouble will tell you how i can help. we need good dentures. i went to the prosthodontist. here's what you can do here super-duper good. really. what can you walk on at all and not think about anything, but he here i drew the numbers. and this man took and gave me this money, this was the first such case in your life. well, so that you know so much, this is how the universe opened up for a meeting, in the

literal sense of the word, when you need a lot of money and a person appears who speaks in and don’t think about anything. it's hard for me to say. hmm first, i'm afraid, just approaching such a question. in fact, that's all for me now. this time helps. just an incredible number of people and not only money and well, purely organizational and well, and just support because, uh, i don't even know who. thank you because it's, well, really fantastic. did you know that this is how the world works or would you be more willing to say that, i mean , you know, like when a person relies on himself and only himself or suddenly discovers that actually, here's help there is always and everywhere there is such a key that is

extremely important for me, it appeared precisely after the injury, because before the injury, as i said for me, it was such a direct key to the world. it was the concept that what is death is this is extremely important and now and i feel and know that it is somewhere here and it seems to me that it is very right to know about it. but it appeared. well, in short, i'll try to eat such a philosopher, vladimir solovyov, he wrote such an article. about the meaning of love, a very small article, and he speaks. what is love? this is very. well, this is when you idealize the object of love, well, it seems to you that he is better, that he is like that in general, he writes like that in an unnatural light. this is a fact, and then solovyov makes an assumption. hmm, for me this is great hope and he says, what if

there is this unnatural light, maybe, uh, we can see the world at this moment? e yes, well, just the way it is, yes, in fact, the way it is intended for me is the key that everywhere her people try through it. uh, it's not that the key. it 's hope, it's the hope that the world is such that it can be understood that way, so it turns to you with this particular side. oh, god forbid, i'm afraid. eh, it’s just categorical to talk about it when you know that you expect something from the human world, and then scoring this true you say it like that. the truth is generally, once i start the truth. here at once with tomatoes in me, please, so that i wake up. let's not know what we are going to listen to now the person who met on your way. this is your prosthetist, just mikhail moskovtsev. let 's come to listen to him. he brought it. so let’s say, they brought it, it’s clear that the person was tired for a long time hanging out in

clinics, but still there was no hopelessness in his eyes. that is, he did not smell of a badge, when a person is interested, he wants wants something, that is, he wants to get up. he wants to get back into the ranks, mind his own business. he goes through all the stages of rehabilitation faster. that's just sergei, probably, he said such a thing, go a step. he went 10, they said those kilometers will pass two. that is, he gave all his best, everything he could from himself, he did what he can practically, i’m more sure that most of the same age, with the same problems, can do the same, but his relationship, rather, such people lead to

yourself. here he is one of them he said that i worked all day with two cameras around his neck as a photo correspondent. i know what it's like to carry two heavy cameras and be on your feet all day. i had no doubt that he might throw something else, but i did not know that it would be skiing again. we may return to gorny, but you also learned to dance. oh, listen, i'm generally lucky. uh, amazing stories uh participate. i was invited as an understudy in a feature film to shoot this film about a man. just like me almost an autobiography, almost. here is such a person. this is a terrible animal in terms of sports, in general, i just don’t know, so it took him a month after the amputation to get on alpine skiing, sometimes it ’s such a fantasy. yes, uh, and uh, i

was doing an understudy and it was an interesting situation, what to dance? i didn’t know how, especially in prostheses, but according to the plot it was necessary to shoot in one day. first we dance, as if i don’t know how the first time, and then several years passed. and i'm already gorgeous , just a master, yes, yes, that was wonderful it's very nice to dance. e with a beautiful girl who knows how to help and guide you. it was wonderful. i came home. of course, we danced with polina. she dances really well for me. well, things didn't go any further. i don't know, maybe skiing takes a lot of time. in short, it seems like it's generally the thought that came to your mind to go skiing. first time this. well, i tried skiing. i don't remember how long? well, i just tried it there friends went. me too well so too try. if friends went, you immediately went to some serious result.

after 2 years of skating, you already had awards there, including bronze medals there at some competitions, and as i know that now you have the task of participating in the paralympics there. 2018, well, that is, here you are somehow further more why i don’t even know, that’s the question. how would, and how else in general, that is. well, in general, i just didn’t expect that big sport is such an energy that attracts me very much. these are surprises for me. became. this is the very transcendent energy that is very difficult to find elsewhere. and when it does. this is incredible. this is a huge power. i want to invite us to stop now and listen to the skier maya simanov. this is a skier with a visual impairment. but let's listen, how did she take your arrival, so to speak, how she watched you, the boy is completely incomprehensible with legs without legs. that is, i

knew that well, absolutely nothing is visible, even they are not a professional. so hmm i say i choose skis, what he needs to know here, i don’t know, so he chose lies, rendered thanks and left. you know the earrings everything, it's hidden. absolutely. maybe such a gentle , so airy, such a rude, speaking sound voice and absolutely. this is real brutality. she is completely invisible. but hmm, so we have it even among ourselves. uh, they called the tourists. it would seem that everything is fine. eh, well, he has no middle ground for everything. he, in my opinion, does not feel tired until he falls exhausted, then he becomes quiet, for a while. he is so sat down, and on the mountain ly. that it already breaks without them. he cannot live without it. eh, then, in my opinion, a person in general is one who must take a certain peak. he is generally like that. the money for the first prostheses was given to sergei by a stranger

. it's just half a million in the river for me. yes, here on and, as it were, on prostheses, on which you can immediately walk quickly, well and beautifully crossed month. and this briquette gave money. i don't know he learned to dance on prosthetic legs to dance. i did not know how, especially in prostheses. and it was necessary according to the plot in one remove day. first we dance like i don't know how the first time, and then a few years have passed. and i'm already simply gorgeous, just a master, yes, yes, it was wonderful. it was very pleasant to dance. e with a beautiful girl who knows how to help and guide you . it was wonderful. eh, i came home. of course we danced. she dances really well for me. well, something didn't go any further. now his main thing. hello alpine skiing. i

came to my current coach, and he said, come on, let's try the mountain. well he does too crazy with us, so a completely wonderful person. so, well, uh, and we tried it and it was again very painful . but it is almost immediately to feel the anticipation of this, that state of being in love, yes, when you begin to feel the image, how should it be? i didn't expect big sport to be like that. and this is such an energy of life without borders sergey alexandrovich but for me it is still curious. one big. you said that now you are taking responsibility for everything that happens. if i i would probably have been enlightened if well, this is right , well, responsibility. this is one of the key concepts. if you think about it like that, it immediately comes to the fact that we are mortal, which is very

deep, but it starts with a simple one. well, i'm very mom. yes, it did help. she trusted me and let me really decide. e of the smallest childhood. uh, really responsible for what i do. eh, there was such a case that was very revealing for me. i remember and it was when i was less than 5 years old. i really wanted to go for mushrooms alone. well at 5 a child wants to go looking for mushrooms alone. well, this is crazy. yes, but, uh, i told my mother that i’ll go to the interrogations there 300 m, so i myself and well, i’ll be back. i uh, that's it. i really want to, but and she let me go, but the fact is that later, as i later found out, all the return is there for my mother, almost this one. you mean, a fool let a small child go into the forest alone, that's all, go there, here. uh, i ended up hearing this story where my mom, dandelion god , literally took the villas and said, if anyone at all, if they knew what was here

here's hmm sarah. yes, he should come himself. i trust him. and i came happy, i remember these two mushrooms all my life. well, yes, i did what i promised. i reached the interrogation, and i returned. i knew that my mother would be worried, but here's hmm and this is a question, yes, responsibility at that moment. yes, i was responsible for myself at the age of 5. now i have a little daughter, and i realized that this is actually the most difficult and the most difficult thing for her that i can offer her here, and it’s very difficult to make a choice, uh, take responsibility for this, you have to, how to dose whether? yes, that is a lot. well, you can't very little, too, you can't, because it won't. well, whatever it is, it's important, it's very important to convey to her that this is real. here, how would it be you. only you can. well, i don’t know how

difficult it is to decide. actually, when the baby comes, well, before the baby comes. you know how everything is, how everything is arranged, how to educate him, as soon as he appears, all this he immediately knows nothing , nothing at all. he, she came into this world , all that i can do is, as it were, be present. that is, i have the feeling that it has already taken place here and my task. well that is, well, well, what can i, well love some tools to offer? yes, including taking it there. well , it is already here, it has already taken place. i look, here she is. i just can't believe it with such eyes. she's already here, it's fantastic. i did not know that small children. they already are. seriously, thank you very much for our conversation. we want you, and from our program to make such a gift for your family, which we did not see here, that it's a pity, but nevertheless skiing is mountain skiing for the whole family. please. find an opportunity to climb the slope to get

high, but we have one more gift for you. i'll ask now, thank you now seryozha now. and this is serious, these are butterflies, and the most that neither is butterflies, which will live for quite a decent time next to you next to your daughter. thank you very much. good luck to you. calls himself a kamyshin traveler, because he was born in the city of kamyshin travels around the country for 4 years already, having set as his goal to visit all

1,113 small towns of russia over the past few years, moving around the country by hitchhiking, he visited more than 300 cities of russia along the way, giving lectures on travel and how to protect yourself and your loved ones from the purchasing influence of totalitarian everyone. and the story of his wanderings began quite dramatic even for schoolchildren, he ended up in a sect. for 11 years he was engaged in missionary work , preaching, casting new adherents into a totalitarian organization for some time in his no doubt about his convictions. but one day he realized that he was not at all the master of his fate. after several unsuccessful attempts to leave all those who did not give up. the thirst for freedom was stronger. today, alone with everyone, the man who discovered

freedom for himself ivan shiryaev, it’s good that in your travels you brought to the city of moscow and that we can talk with you. how many cities have you visited, at the moment already today, 41, the city of russia is about 35% of the total. and what is this strange idea of ​​the city russia to visit honestly. i dreamed about it since childhood, i loved to look at the map of russia to travel on it mentally. mom is a geography teacher. i think that also had an effect. so to speak, you are hitchhiking or have already diversified. this is a variation of basically hitchhiking. i rarely use any other means of transportation. ah, besides the traditional hitchhiking. it happens railway stop hydrostop. and even

an air stop is also possible. of course, much harder right in front of you, of course, much harder and among hitchhikers, it is considered the coolest when the airstop is yes, yes, well, this is also real. i wanted to understand this for free, so to speak, when hitchhiking or hydrostop or air, stop or whatever , you need to pay some extra money. it's free without money, but at the same time not for free. the driver who stops on the highway to let travelers down. he, too, is expecting something. uh, it's mostly communication, in order not to fall asleep at the wheel, especially if you are driving far to pass the time, sometimes, on the contrary, you need free ears man, who needs to tell something, yes, yes, and you are absolutely ready for this steering wheel and entertain your interlocutor and be these ears for the interlocutor.

it is a fare. well, this is your willingness, and in a sense, it was nurtured, as i understand it, by your existence in the sect in which you spent many years. yes, there are a lot of useful skills in terms of communicating with people. i got it in the sect. it comes in handy in life. and you got everything for some purpose. you needed to be a preacher. it was mandatory condition. uh, stay in sex. it was necessary to spread these beliefs to involve new students. they got a great skill and became more adept in this matter. in general, hmm, so to speak, not only are you not afraid to talk about your stay in the dark , and even in a sense, you are now doing this. it seems to me that it is also a kind of preaching only of the opposite sense in this one, so to speak, quite free and easy to talk about this topic, but it seems to you that this is some kind of important mission, and to tell people about what mm

totalitarian sects of this kind are interesting to many people. and having such an experience. uh, which is not every person. i try to share it. here, tell me, please, and how could it happen to you that you got into a sect at the age of 15 . usually children go where on the street there, yes in bad company, relatively speaking, why exactly did the sect become your image, probably the usual standard teenage problems questions. what is the meaning of life to dedicate oneself to? and when i heard from my classmate that she was attending a meeting religious. eh, i was wondering, they read the bible there. they communicate there. they call each other brothers and sisters. and i decided to go out of curiosity. and even out of a desire to mock these believers. and what happened? why they didn’t make fun of him impressed me most of all, the way they met me there, i was a fifteen-year-old boy, they surrounded me with care and

attention. i felt needed. we were given the opportunity for self-realization, they began to say that i can teach other people to speak in front of them from the stage. and naturally. i have caught fire to me will turn for advice. i will become so wise. yes, this attracts many people reacted when, in fact, they were attentive to your life or not. or he leaves and goes somewhere, his parents thought that this was another of my many hobbies, and therefore at first they did not convey the meaning. what were your hobbies before this? i loved pulling out election flyers from other people's mailboxes and pasting them on the walls in my room. instead of wallpaper. i loved to fill in all the coupons and order everything with them so that it was probably free. i thought the day was over. in vain, if not a single

large letter was thrown to me in the mailbox. and there were a lot of similar hobbies, so, well, i went to the meeting, nothing will pass either, as from letters. and when they realized that this did not go away, when i began to apply in life, what i was taught in sex, when i began to refuse to celebrate birthdays new year and other holidays, when i stopped communicating so closely with relatives, that is these changes became noticeable and naturally alerted relatives, but you answered that i answered that this was the only truth. everything else is the devil. you need to go only this way, as you think, this is a conscious action in this or that sex. well, that's the kind of tradition that arises there. this is imposed by the leadership of the sect. and when you are there , you think that it is your own conclusions, conclusions, your own choice. in fact,

this is imposed from the outside by repeated repetition every day of the same thing they inspire you, that it is necessary to please god in this way, to please god in no other way, including in terms of holidays. there is a conscious purpose in this to say that these holidays are not good for severing relationships with loved ones as much as possible. i think so, and it has a very fast and effective effect. obviously the first few years. you say, this is the feeling, so to speak, in inspiration and so on, and well, the year has passed well. well two there was no doubt. they just strengthened in their feeling that this is the very right path that you have chosen doubt and critical thinking is not allowed. even forbidden are not encouraged in any way, of course, some doubts arose. well , there was simply no time to develop them to think about it. you get on the rails of this life and already out of the

rut. you can’t go out the day literally by the hour, it’s scheduled week after week and there’s no time to think. when you hmm were still in school, because when this story happened to you, you did not experience any ridicule. for example, those who found out about what you did not hide, so to speak there was a lot of ridicule for becoming a sectarian, but it was not difficult to endure it all. why uh don't know, i tried to preach to all odnoklassniki hmm students. uh, tried to spread those beliefs. and maybe in the form that i am firm on this path. uh, they didn't laugh so much, uh, but before you became a cultist, before these 15 years. what were your relations like, so to speak, it was with my peers that from childhood i was considered a jerk both at school and in other

places. and in general, it was not difficult for me to be just like everyone else, as i say. well, he probably differed in some way from other people, to run around at breaks to pull high school girls by their pigtails. here. well, that sounds pretty normal. i would say, well, for some reason in our class we are going like this , i would somehow get used to the fact that they treat me like that. yeah. before becoming a sectarian. i was a trio. but the sect somehow had a positive effect on my studies. i have already begun to receive fours pyaterochki more often uh-huh, because again, the goal is the same let's show evidence of our lives. that i am a servant of god and it affects me well you did not go to higher education. still, higher education is not encouraged. why not that it is forbidden, but it is considered not a spiritual aspiration and on a

person who is a sectarian. uh, getting a higher education will somehow look askance, as a person, well, who doubts something and sets worldly goals, not spiritual ones. what do you think, now what is the point of banning higher education, a person who knows less will doubt less and be less likely to leave there was a sect or some commercial component in this section, voluntary donations were encouraged. well, i would not say that this was the main thing, they sectarians take something more valuable from a person than money. soul property. you no longer belong to your loved ones, but completely obey the section and are ready. all the time, all the forces of e and the soviet are also forbidden to devote higher education to this matter. and what is allowed how to live? mostly members of the sect work. m-m janitors cleaners loaders in

in the service sector it is rare to find a person, uh, who has a higher education, occupies some significant position, if he even has a higher education, then most likely he received it before joining everyone who worked with whom. i worked as a helper at a construction site, i worked as a cleaner of entrances. e so that the work takes only a few hours a week you understand in my head all the time such thoughts that everything is outside the sect. here is satan , everything is drawn in gloomy colors only within the community, perhaps real happiness, true love is everything correct and real. it's all the devil in her. from childhood, he did not develop relationships with other children. i, well, probably differed in some way from others . since childhood, everyone who attracted him, the attention with which he was

treated there, considered me a jerk. i felt useful useful gave the opportunity for self-realization. certain thoughts and actions were imposed on him daily. you get on the rails of this life and already out of the rut. you can’t go out the day is literally scheduled by the hour week after week and there is no time to think escape the story of a former sectarian. the fact that you did not enter any institute threatened you with the army, and how is the situation with the army, how does not everyone belong to those who were, and it is forbidden to serve in the army yeah before the adoption of the law on alternative civilian service, sectarians were in prison. uh. it didn't scare me. and so, when in 2004 a law came into force in the village, but about alternative service. i was just uh ready, uh, for the draft and doing alternative

service. in the nursing home for 3.5 years as a ward nurse in the documents, it was listed as a nurse, because such a position was not provided for men, and at that time, so to speak, you still continued to go to the meeting. that is, one does not interfere with the other. it was very difficult with an eight hour work day with such a busy schedule. but sectarian affairs were more important for me, i washed quickly after work, dressed in a hurry to preach at the meeting. and so the service passed very quickly, partly due to this, the week after the weeks flew by very quickly. actually the choice was whether i would continue to be a member of the sector, because if i agreed to serve in the army, i would have been expelled from there. and it was completely unthinkable for me at that time. and what happens to the expelled when an announcement is made in the congregation? let's say shiryaev is no longer our brother.

they stop talking to the shalevy to say hello. he becomes a vile apostate and all ties with him are interrupted by none of his former friends. eh, acquaintances from the sect will not communicate with him, if i have a family left there, then even relatives will stop communicating. wow, you saw that. yes, of course, i saw it, but for a convinced sectarian. it, of course, hmm is not a reason to hesitate in something. on the contrary, you condemn the person who is condemned, uh, who is excluded. uh, you judge him and think, this is worse than death. it would be better if he died than sinned. uh-huh. and you have a situation where someone close to you is hurt in this way or a girlfriend. i stopped to communicate, as and as ordered, otherwise it is impossible, otherwise you will also be

condemned. well, that is, it turns out that the leading feelings are fear fear fear and guilt guilt you constantly feel that something underdoing doing something, not doing something that needs to be done more and it is very depressing and constantly stressful. yeah, every day, that is, there is such ostentatious external love for each other in meetings, well, coming home, everyone feels oppressed and exhausted. yes, this is it. i think the worst thing in the sect. eh, this hypocrisy you do what is expected of you, and not what you want or what your heart induces and hmm the sector deprives. e human freedom freedom in almost all areas of life. eh, they dictate to me. what music

listen? with whom to communicate? yes, who to marry, whether to have a beard, what to wear in everything i must obey strict rules. after all, after the army, you left for another city. why did i suddenly want to change, and the situation in my hometown was very difficult to preach. these preachers were well known there. i even counted in our city for one sectarian. there were few 200 civilians. i decided to move to another area to preach where this doctrine had not yet been heard, and in fact , it was more interesting to practice this activities, people were more willing to listen. well , because they didn’t come across, to be honest, because rather tragic circumstances happened to your family with your dad, yes, after the death of your father. i

was forced to take care of my babu cross. his mother and in connection with this he returned to kamyshin not just passed away, but he committed suicide, what happened, it's hard to say what actually happened, but to some extent i feel guilty, because my father wanted to see i wanted to see my future differently. uh he wanted me to get a higher education, find a good job, provide for myself, become a successful person. well, i chose the other way and it bothered him. perhaps this influenced his decision to leave this life to contact before his death and somehow talk to you. ah. it didn't quite work out. i usually come on vacation. i came home only for a week to see my relatives to meet everyone. and on the very first evening when i arrived home, my father hanged himself right in the apartment. that is

, it turns out that it was done so that you found out, apparently yes, maybe he planned it in advance and decided to do it after waiting for me. this, of course, was a strong blow for me. until now, thoughts about this haunt me, but, uh, having returned to kamyshin, i continued to engage in sectarian activities, uh, and devoted myself to this. this event did not arouse your desire. so to say, to be closer to your family and yet. er, well, appreciate something else. well, brothers, sisters, brothers and sisters, but here is the most dear blood, on the contrary, uh, at that moment we moved away with relatives not with my mother, but with my father's relatives, because they allegedly accused me of my father's suicide. i uh tried to persuade him to register an apartment for me

or something like that, supposedly. i drove him to suicide. well, they had some similar thoughts . but uh, with my mother, maybe, not only because of the sect, we were distant. and also because you lived in different cities, and at some point, you got married, married a girl, too, who was, so to speak, within the framework of this sect. was it because you fell in love with me or because that's how marriage is supposed to be. i didn't mean to, at all in sex. hmm, marriage is not encouraged. yeah , not that it's forbidden, but the philosophy is so simple, if you can, don't get married, be free to do sectarian deeds. if married, try not to have children, so that nothing distracts from the ministry. what already, if god forbid , one child was born. well, try not to have a second one? well listen and and it's not well, so.

you were familiar with this ideology, but it didn’t seem to you that it was, well, strange. no. i'm uh i lived only by this, i wanted to promote these goals, and before the question on which they will be here, you, probably, more than once, maybe, answered like a preacher, but it is said be fruitful and multiply no, eh yes, yes, but the answer is now the last days of this evil system of things to give birth to children in this evil world is not prudent the best to multiply spiritually, helping new disciples to approach god so that they survive. uh, those events that will happen in the future and before getting married. i made sure that my wife, like me, does not want to have children. and only then we went to the registry office, after all, what is it, if you can not get married, do not marry, you could not help but get married, you fell in love. here it is necessary. what a mistake. and your chosen one, she, uh, also, so to speak

, has been in this section since childhood. yes, my ex- wife. a has been in sex since childhood. and she continues to be there to this day. that is, you are a vile apostate and she is there. he did not understand that the sect deprived him of his freedom, they dictate to me. what kind of music to listen to? with whom to communicate, whom to marry, whether to have a beard, what to wear in everything, he considers the most terrible thing in sex with hypocrisy you do what is expected of you, and not what you want or what your heart prompts you to do. he feels guilty towards his father father wanted to see me differently, my future wanted to see others, and he wanted me to get a higher education and find a good job. provided for himself became a successful man victory is the story of a former sectarian. you tried for 11 years within the framework of this sect, and why exactly

after you got married some kind of worm of doubts, you always had a worm of doubts, but i didn’t give it a critical outlet thinking is forbidden to read some third-party literature, what former sectarians write, what religion writes. vedas researchers can not, but there is still how modest he lived. uh, worked more than money porches. i barely had enough to make ends meet, i had neither a computer nor the internet and, accordingly, it was not possible to find this information somewhere in order to put my doubts into motion. we were given a laptop for the wedding and it all started with that. and climbed into the forbidden secret from his wife, secret from friends. i am i began to get acquainted with such information, what

former members of this sect write, what other people write. observers among them to read it, you should have accumulated some, so to speak, a critical mass of your own inconsistencies, which you wanted to double-check in other sources. what exactly by that time, there were a lot of such questions. uh, for example, what concerned the alleged dates of the end of the world. in this sect several times. uh, a certain date was appointed when you need to expect the end of the world, and people in those times were preparing for this date selling the property devoted themselves entirely to preaching, and then bam the date came no end of the world further. yes, many were disappointed. of course, i’m waiting for you, waiting, the end of the world, it won’t come, and the strongest impression on me was made by two

books that were written by a former member of the governing council of this sect. this is generally unheard of because of their entire history, the situation when one of the most important leaders, who was there since childhood, spent 60 years there, did just that. suddenly bam i was disappointed and wrote two books on this subject, and i had a bottom- up view of the situation in the sect. and what he describes from top to bottom. that's right, thanks to his books. i have many puzzles in my head, they saw that this is a use. yes, sectarians. uh, they firmly believe that these leaders receive interpretations of the scriptures almost directly from god, uh, some kind of guidance and already in the form of letters they send it to the congregation. and this former leader hmm wrote how these meetings actually happen when half asleep grandfathers, and then such comrades

fall asleep at meetings. we must vote. here they are pushing him, he will not understand what it is all about, what to vote for? e what in general? this is a simple human organization, and not god's, as i thought? well, why did you study all this in secret from your wife, because the wife is a close person at that time. i was not ready to share my doubts with anyone, even with my wife, and besides, i was afraid that the elders would find out about this from my wife, and then and then i could lose my some honorary positions. and well, and in general, it would be necessary to snitch, as they say. sorry for such a stupid word, but nonetheless. this would be correct according to sectarian laws. if she snitched, and this is the norm, this is the worst thing. but this is the norm, it is perceived as god's will, nothing else. and so, uh, that's why i did it all in secret. in addition, at that time i could not somehow formulate an explanation, er, something to confirm

my thoughts. what exactly do i doubt that i'm not arranges. and how can i continue to be, if i leave this and, uh, i decided to leave for me the easiest way at that time was to leave my city, so that no one would know about it and start a new life. you didn't just leave your hometown . you even staged suicide. yes indeed. eh, i thought that then it was the best option for me, because in fact i was in such a state when i either hanged myself or committed suicide and went on a trip. first i went to another city it was about winter from kamyshin to rostov-on-don, since no one knew me there, it was easier to get lost there. i spent the winter in rostov and in the spring, as soon as the snow melted. went on a trip. are you actually alive and well or

not? no one knew where i was or what happened to me it was really cruel, maybe unreasonable, but it was uh 9 months. i was on the federal wanted list as a missing person. though on purpose. i didn't hide, i used my passport. uh worked at the factory and only in the amur region, a this is about 7,000 km from kamyshin, quite by accident , when checking documents at the traffic police post, it turned out that i was wanted by the federal wanted list. to be honest, almost no one was looking for me. only one friend hmm from the sect, one single person. and i thought that i had a lot of friends. on wait for me, he told me that shiryaev had disappeared. we are looking for him. that was the only person who offered some real effort to

find me for this, of course, he is very grateful. we still communicate, uh, and he, despite the fact that you a vile renegade and he, too, will soon become a vile renegade. i hope yes and that was the worst thing for me to lose friends. you had the illusion that you have them. uh, well, at least it seemed to me, and when i was taken off the wanted list, i got in touch on the internet. uh, with all those sect friends. i just got banned on social media. uh, ignore stopped talking. eh, and here i felt, what is this love, what is this brotherly feeling, what is this fanaticism? this, too, in addition to the books of that leader that i read, uh, was hmm a powerful incentive to officially leave the sect is not only to leave. that's how i left to formally write a statement. i no longer want to be with you, exclude me from your ranks. you nevertheless

made some attempts to adjust. just such ordinary human connections. there, i don’t know, as a result, my mother called, of course, the first thing. i got in touch with my relatives, when i was already ready for this. my mother was very happy about it. she didn't scold me. and i remember how she shed tears when i first in many years. led it with a day birth, after all, many years. i didn’t celebrate birthdays, they just didn’t, but i didn’t congratulate, and you celebrated your own birthday when you left everyone there, of course. i celebrated my first birthday after leaving the sect in the mosque. believe it or not, an unexpected place. i didn't expect it myself. we traveled with a friend in the crimea, we met on the internet. he was looking for a travel companion and

we started traveling together. by the time he and i started traveling. i had 2 weeks travel experience and he had no experience at all. he considered me as a comrade, yes, he said a mentor and a teacher, he opened a new world to me. and so, it means that we traveled with him in the crimea , ended up in sudak, it was friday, a sacred day for muslims, suddenly i tell him orthodox. you have never been to a mosque. let's go see how the mass is perfect. we came there and met us well. before that, i was in the mosque. and they tell us , guys, that you will put up a tent, somewhere in our mosque there is a special room for guests and spend the night there and it was just my day birth. look, but here you are traveling, mostly alone you earn extra money, where you have to and basically you will be somehow like that. well, what

is called so to speak, uh, there is no intellectual work, far from handymen. yes , and so on. yes, yes, but now, at the moment, i have a very interesting creative and even highly intellectual work. uh, in krasnodar as a loader. actually. here is today. nothing satisfies and pleases me, like a journey, until i know for myself another way, which would bring me so much joy, yes, so i push your boundaries in a way. yes, life in one city is a frame here you can somehow how to say. change these directions, but the circuit in your journey is to visit thousands. how many cities around 1.122 dollars do you put

in this scheme and tell yourself it's done, but it's not just for show. it is interesting for me to get acquainted with cities with regions. i try to learn about their history about their features and share with blog readers so that they also see a lot people like it, especially since no one before me set himself such a task. that is, you have a certain vanity. probably like every person. let's talk about your sins of sins. i have a lot of transmission time is not enough, vanity is love. this also plays a role. but if someone before me coped with this task, i would still be interested, uh, to visit all the cities of russia and how did you escape the temptations there, for example, to want more money

tastier, there is more beautiful to dress to have such gadgets, and also such i am surprised at myself, but, probably, this is what comes from childhood, that i was a jerk. i'll probably stay with him. are you claiming that by now you have become an agnostic or an atheist? not? i didn't become an atheist. i do not deny the existence of god or any higher powers, but i am not ready to take sides. whatever religion. that is, you still have an interest, but such to him, and you have how it works. and how is it with you after leaving the sect where i was, right? i visited at least 17 different confessions, which are also considered sects , were very interesting. well, just compare from a research point of view. and how they worship god. what do they believe, what do they have,

while i was in one sect. i was not allowed to meet others. and it was interesting. uh-huh, that's actually what i was doing in rostov when i left kamyshin before the start of the trip. yes, and sometimes i go to divine services of some denominations, i was friends with everyone, i love everyone that concerns your wife. here you called your mother and your wife with his wife corresponded by email. and she wrote that she no longer wants to communicate with me, since i left one of those who are ready to divorce, since we don’t have children, it was not difficult for you to do it unilaterally. this is a serious loss. yes, i even regret that these ties are severed, maybe to some extent. i continue to love her. but it would be worse, in my opinion. if i had stayed then or acted differently, you wouldn’t try to knock on her door, you know, i don’t know how to write. i'm still electronic letters says.