these are two paquet woman's emotionalities changed, because at the first stage a during the period of the red movement and the beginning of communism. it was one look at a woman. she was up to the point that she was public ah, and then gradually such a return to a greater setting on a pedestal, let's say women, that is, she still remains inviolable, anyway , values ​​\u200b\u200bcrawl through anyway about the absence there, but a large number relations are good, and already i think that to just in time for the middle of the 20th century. everything returned to about the same context that and there was a lot it would seem to be a spiral. yes, that is, uh, it was violent, slightly different names. this may have been wearing a different ideological pickup, but for sure, but by and large the meaning remained. this is the same one, but girls of the forties. still, they were enough for the whole. of course, respectively, and

yes, subsequent events in our country. one way or another, anyway, we went through at least two more permutations of value systems, if we are talking about the present time, that this is precisely the existence in of these fortunes, these stories are eternal, because at the present moment in time the social society is perhaps not so stratified. and although, perhaps this applies only to the central part of russia yes, we have a big country. many peoples live in it. many different social biases of different cultures and different cultures live in it, and different religions, including, but for some it is now a game what is written by bunin, what is written. let's say the final word that for each of you in general, it means dark laziness than they are for you. with wonderful that

they mean to you, symbolize, dark alley, as a symbol of what it is and what dark alley is for you, as a symbol. probably this is for me the road is a road that does not have a specific point. it's just like a process. well, is this the road? indeed, it is a learning process. this is a process, uh, analysis of the past, and this is a process, but lighting is different, but here it's not about lighting. this is called the medical word reconsolidation, that is, a person looks at his past and turns it into some kind of completely hmm illusory picture, in which, in principle, he can hide, for example, take a break from the terrible present. or maybe just create it as a literary work. and what do you think to yourself? dark alleys, what's that for you? this is an attempt to carry your past through decaying time , an attempt that is tragic in its very

idea. let's put it this way, but tragedy itself is beautiful, so it's very beautiful berdyaev's idea of ​​​​sexuality that is obviously tragic, because trying to merge you still get separated, then you're all anyway you're on your own walking down these dark alleys, absolutely alone it's interesting to it's really similar to what i feel through and for me the dark alley is an example. uh, how can erotica have expression after all. well, let's just say an example of the high art of reverse engineering. i mean, i think this topic is very interesting, but i find it incredibly difficult to maintain. here is some balance of the frame to one side and give to the reader. this sensual sensation on the other hand, and not lie anywhere and e about how it all happens and at the same time stay within the framework. here are the admirations of a woman and some

frames that do not allow you to go out . here, in the direction of some kind of physicality, or earthiness. and this is what absolutely fascinates me. this was a podcast, a must read. today we talked about the dark alleys of bunin as the pinnacle of erotic prose. uh, i’m glen batnik, director, writer of the leading podcast, and our guest today was marina stern, a neurologist, head of the department of nerve rehabilitation, candidate of medical sciences and e, sergey zotov, a poet, whom, by the way, i admire is a wonderful poet, seryozha and a journalist. thank you. big. thank you. psychic podcast, my name is natalia loseva i am a journalist and my co-host clinical psychologist ph.d. in psychology mikhail

khors and our guest maria filat maria 27-25 23 2015 and 8, and we are now living in a large nice apartment, and my problem is that my adult children are riding me, that is, they they don't want me at all, let alone help in some way. yes, although we have a normal relationship, if i’m one on one with someone, yes, that is , for example, but with my eldest daughter, yes, that is, now we married her, i ’m fine now in october. yes, she got out. and how many children live in the apartment now there are five and you have a problem with whom with adult children? ah, two daughters and a son, that is the problem, what is the problem is that everyone wants me to be

as before, i practically raised them alone, yes, that is, i worked all the time, took me to school in kindergarten in the nursery for distant lands. i wanted to give them the best. what is the problem? the problem is that they are not something that they can't do to me, well, they don't do anything around the house. yes, even now, when they have already studied and received a good education, and they are all with a profession now, well, practically, yes, that is, they would all finish picking and work. and i'm not talking about the material. what are you asking? yes , i don’t know how to pay for the joint there, i don’t participate financially in any way, because it starts. why me? yes, that is why i should give, yes, and for example, the son, who just now got a job, yes he graduated from his educational institution, he does not help you either. well , maybe they somehow compensate for this by participating there with the younger ones sitting on fences and so on. that's just the problem, that nothing is cleaning,

no help with the younger ones, right? that is, i again drive to school myself and there are still problems that i suddenly began to work little, yes, when i was eight six, four two. i also went to two more jobs. ah here is, but me then was not so years. how many now now they have grown up and want me to do housework again. that is, i still prepared pickles for everyone, because someone doesn’t eat, onions, someone doesn’t eat carrots, this is fried, this is steamed, and even with all this, i should not have any personal life at all maria , i understand correctly that everyone eats at home and cooks, basically i will bring it out. yes, everything is not. of course they can eat lunch. i don’t understand at all now who returns when and who goes where, wait for the food in the refrigerator, who puts the food in and buy it. me because no one goes to my store on their own, they have to go to

the refrigerator store with their own money, everyone who uses the refrigerator, but of course, they can and can not eat and can not dine. for example, if i cook something a lot. for example borscht. yes, they ate it, only on the first day on the second on the third. i flush it down the toilet. sorry further. why do you cook borscht in a whole pot? i am now completely confused about this is my problem. i do not understand, yes, how should i behave in this situation, what should i sign the products or what? yes? or, for example, what else problem? well, that is, touching the refrigerator, someone brought it. i don't know who brought, for example, cottage cheese. yes, another daughter got up in the morning and ate this cottage cheese. the one who bought it, she gets up a little later and says. and where is my cottage cheese, who ate it, it turns out that i’m somehow in a communal apartment. and even if absolutely not communal, i would rule. no, i would call it a hostel. yes, that is, it turns out

that no one is doing anything there. you can evict someone who breaks the dorm rules, you understand? well, probably, yes, they would also like me to be a cleaning lady. oh no. well asked the question not the essential toilet bowl, who clean it or me? no, well, i still can, of course, sometimes, because the apartment is so big and yet i work and take care of a small child, but not a small schoolgirl. yes, i drive her in the morning at six in the morning. i get up at eight for school. clearly, small children. yeah, well, i mean, i'm doing it, no one helps me. exactly this. well, if you only ask someone, here is a fifteen-year-old, and now he also went, but he says. why are you asking me? i'm busy too. i have volleyball. i have a section. well then is, that is, you are doing the cleaning. it's alive. well, i may know to hire a cleaning lady once a month, because there are things that we have on the team, of course, you don’t have any cash desk at all. we put an envelope like this here a month ago, because everyone has different salaries for

everyone, someone is still studying there. yes, there are those who work part-time and, as it were, the salary everyone is different and it turns out that they say you work a little implementation. he says you please, like in the past. well, like when he was little, yes, that is, i repeat, probably that i wanted to go to one clinic and worked in two in another. yes, that is, a speech therapist, yes it is a polyclinic, where is the man in this e in this whole story the man is you do not have these children do not, we divorced my father, just in the thirteenth year. that is, you are without a man. yes, you have children from one five times from one further. so i got married a second time and just the sixth child i have from and what happened to that? and, because he tried, he came into the family, the second husband, but lasted a year. well, because other people's children, yes, that is, somehow i already understood that he had

his own somehow we quickly met. somehow fast. that's what i have, maybe this is my problem now, that there are problems with children yes, with older ones. well, i thought that everything was according to the classics of the genre, but they didn’t do it much. they accepted it, but he didn't really want to. eh, to tell that you really are, that is, they had some kind of conflicts, well , there are no conflicts, somehow there were no conflicts. it's just that he had a slightly different second husband's perception. he thought, that everything will be as festively beautiful, that all the princesses and everyone should. to make some such older children, yes, a lot of beautiful children, but nothing interesting, he had such an opinion. that's who he thought the money would look like. but i can’t answer this question for you, because how can i say, i am a woman and male psychology, that they are like you probably, and you are like that, it seems to me very accommodating. yes , very much so. yes, a very aspiring one

cares with high value precisely, but those who try from all sides. it's all there do the best sleep put. what happened to the children? why do they as you think, they now, in any case, did not go to you. it started a long time ago, such a consumer attitude, like this, no matter how i can say that it is even consumer. yes? that is, they love me, right, but what does it mean? well, they say, mary love is the case. well, i think that the problem is that together, yes , that is, when i'm alone with a child, if only with someone, yes, that is, it turns out fine when they are all together, it turns out to me, you get one-on-one understanding of everything with a child, that is, one example. so you say, listen, i'm very tired. i drag you half my life. this is what they don't

want to hear. they cannot understand, it seems to them that i live with them one on one. yes, because in principle, i am quickly going to quickly orient myself, but let's go. yes, let's go. here we are now with my daughter we went to rest. yes, everyone bought tickets in st. petersburg. no, not junior. here, yes you bought a ticket. no. that's right here she is. yes, when one on one, she says, mom let's go let's go or there, we went to the water park. well, here it is, one on one. she has concerns for me. and when in the family she says, and why should i, exactly? i also work five working days and two days off. i'm getting tired. and this, for example, vika da sits at home and does nothing. vika says, i also work. i just finished working remotely. there she is preparing some kind of olympics there, that is, and in general others. there they begin to compare themselves with their girlfriends, yes, which one child and to whom mom dad gives everything you ever told them. how hard it was for you when

you got divorced, when you bought an apartment, did you buy it yourself, or of course. yes? no, no, that's the thing with us, well, yes, i paid the loan more. well, well, that's just, yes, you once stood out with them, you told some episodes, when it was very, very hard for you, when you were just exhausted and exhausted. that's why you didn't see it and don't feel it, it seems to me that i was talking about it all with them. and what do you, and how many times did you say? well now i'm trying say, they say, come on, that's it. fine. tell us some episode that you would try to convey to them. here, when it was absolutely difficult, and you would really like your children to know and understand this episode. and so that they sit down with you, your girls, and cry. because the heart could not be broken from that. to have them submit to you at some point.

i had to worry. with their illnesses, with their failures at school with a husband, whom i understand, you could not tear yourself away from the sofa, an unthinkable responsibility, which in fact in fact, women's fragile shoulders, but we must bear. something you told them. well, i told. well, somehow tell us no, well, here, i remember when the sixth was on april 6 , yes, 2007, when i gave birth to my fifth child, i got up in the morning, took me with contractions, took the high school to sokol, then returned home , took me to kindergarten two. excuse me, but the man who was sitting on the couch at that time was sleeping, well , mom, he just woke up, but in general, that's all that concerned. he says, well, you yourself want, why do you need a school with a spanish bias no at this point what he does he was not

at home. he woke up and left and left. yes, he woke up and left. he even went to work there. he went from his mother, that is, his mother lived in a neighboring house. well, that is, he woke up, that's one, well, according to a certain regimen, and clearly went to his home there to his mother. and from there. he was already returning. and you yourself in this, in this whole story, to feel it was so hard for me, that is, further. i went to kindergarten alone. yes, one, that is, this. well, then i went to give birth. not yet. no, not yet, then she returned to pick it up because of yes, and she took the garden to preparatory courses. they told me that they urgently need a card. so i went to this one with a fight. yes, all this attracted him, but i brought this certificate to the tuberculosis dispensary, i had to take some kind of certificate. just met with a friend. i say, i 'll probably take the subway, because i had to go. well, in a certain uh, the

family planning center is there. so it's a completely different county. yes she says you're crazy whether? i say, well, how are the traffic jams? i won't come. well, on the subway. i'm fine, but i had to be taken home. well, i took it home. understood? what all? well, and here i say, then good. i called him, he came, how would we get there and it turned out that i just gave birth and in 10 minutes you told this story in our childhood. they. well, the elder one knows this, because she was her or not, the lions said. this is how you tell us. well, specifically no why? well because we didn't have no time when we're at home, u we talk only about everyday topics, who went where and who, that mom is a robot mom of the terminal. the most offensive, yes, that is, they do not understand what i need in general, that i even want to sleep, yes, that is, i come home. what did you do at home today? but after all, you can have some kind of personal life, right? well, i'm not allowed to do this. i'm not

talking there. well, because you have - a small child says, who tells the older children to whom, who will you leave him with? well, as a matter of fact, i can date my girlfriend. yes only during the day, because i took her to school and at 6:00 i have to pick her up. how many times small. here are the little guys. well, well, that is, to our school, well, the second grade, yes, that is, not near the house. but the child, who , let's say, is the second from the end, how old he is 15, yes, 15 years is not needed with him. i can specifically negotiate with him, but you can still have training with him, yes , well, he’s watching, he, too, why am i further and that’s why i’m having problems now that, like with these two of them are the same grow up or me. in general, what to do, most likely, such. if you do not change, then i have stopped working a lot now. yes? well, anyway, oh-oh-oh, this is not that change in the refusal of the psyche. my name is natalya loseva. i

am a journalist, and my co-host is a clinical psychologist, ph.d. in psychology, mikhail khors, and our heroine maria, with a very difficult situation with her children. i would even say a wonderful heroine, and we admire you. but now, answer me, please, maria to the question. who do you think shows our children? an example of how they treat us from where they can learn that mom needs to be protected, that mom needs help, what when you eat in this house? this food has to be paid for. well, the answer is society as a whole is correct, but more specifically , who exactly is in this society? well, i think that i should kind of set an example, yes, that is, if you have to set an example of what, well, i take care of them about my mother or how

. they gave them an opportunity. they said maybe the little ones would take care of themselves. well, for example, you said there to their older children when they were five or six years old. you listen, i fucked my eldest daughter in marriage. where is the independence of the eldest daughter, even if she is even married at the age of 27? well, that's what many parents say okay michael uh-huh well, maybe, maybe i 'm wrong, because well, i have them quite independent. they even now say to me they say, well, you're raw together, but with your little daughter. you would have gone somewhere yourself, and we are here without you about this on our own, right? let's go back anyway. the question is to what question? who to them can show an example that you can be taken care of by your parents, for example, hmm, somehow i don’t. well, we live separately. mom, i live separately, in my opinion, yes, dad died. wait you take care of yourself. well,

only she has two brothers. well , it means that she lives with her brother. i only mail on dolls to my dear. maria, you take care of yourself. about yourself. yes i want to. well, only i don’t want or care. well, only now, probably, i realized that i need to take care of myself too. what about me it seems wild, sorry, right? but what you described to us. it is the sacrifice of sacrificing yourself to these children. and they can’t take an example from anywhere, you understand, children treat us the way we treat ourselves, to whom you don’t treat children to yourself. well, you know what kind of problem i had, that is, when. well, i myself grew up, that is, with me, and my mother never worked. and that is, there were three of us, you were considered she did a feat and , accordingly, we were there for an extension. oh, for this at the five-day camp there were camps for three shifts. i mean, i took care of myself. here, yes, wait

five days, this is when you think you spent the night , yes, well, to kindergarten, when my mother took me to kindergarten on monday or forgot, yes, that is, i also have this protest, you understand? that is, i felt so bad myself. i remember my childhood and, accordingly, when i gave birth to my children, yes, that is, there were also not three of them, always in a different way and the extremes left, you see, so what should i do to start while an example. and how is it that now i have to and or leave. yes, you have put in your life on this apartment, and you are now going, yes? and i also assume that the children, probably you are already hinted at. yes, i will exchange for you, but already hinting. yes, yes, class, you will change very well. no, i believe i said that this is our father's house. that is, the truth here you see, please, the house. well, it means that we , since we are all together, that is, as it were, a family

nest, as it were, yes. well, that is, we will not change this apartment, but legal ones are an apartment in general on well, only your legal apartments. this is yours, right? do you have a bedroom, is there a bedroom? do we have our own? well we have four rooms. right now, e. well, i and my daughter with a little one again don’t have your own space, that is, you don’t have your own corner, the kitchen for this i understand your kitchen. well, it's also a public place. i don't know, but once again , you asked the question several times. what to do? are you still not sure what to do? i don't know how to implement it. yes? that is, as soon as i start caring. how do you talk about yourself. yes, for example, i say, i will go to the theater today with natalia and my friend , calamus tells me, but i don’t have anyone leave. firstly, ira has ira in the world for 8 years. that is, the world could, yes

, listen, don’t repeat the mistake you made with the elder ugu ira for eight years, in principle, the evening can stay, especially since this is not one. there in the apartment. there are other people close yes, i'm not now. i 'm trying this now, when, well, literally , i had a recent situation. yes, i went and immediately turn off the phone for me the theater, i'm returning there. well, okay. yes, it all ends at 10:00. and there are a lot of calls. where are you? well then, where do i say. why did you leave her? why are you even answering these questions? well, you read heart of a dog heart of a dog looked, maybe, but read it, remember . i don’t want to buy this and magazines for the benefit of the children of germany 50 kopecks. it's a pity no, children do not sympathize sympathize, why do not buy do not want to. and you, after all , are justifying it all, somehow. well, how is this our family nest, so we won’t sell it, but i should. learn to say i

don’t want to. are you entitled to this? i went to the cinema and left ira at home, because i want. why are you afraid to do? so? you are for sure, this is an obvious thing in fact. yes, why do you excuse michael because children are sacred, they are angels an angel. is it possible to refuse? what were you afraid of, what would they tell you? what a disgusting mother is that? that 's what these people say, whom you brought up, fed, gave them an education, and ensured a normal life in a four-room apartment, working two or three jobs. they say about him that you are a disgusting mother, well, not disgusting, why are we from adults the children were about to go out. there, i would now argue. i don’t argue with mikhail i don’t like the door, that’s right there, and if you like living here, then there are certain

orders once a week you sit once a week you once a week you clean everything together in turn we throw off 25% of the salary for a communal apartment, and rare know what happened here the man was not there. mikhail gives rather strict instructions, but i just wrote it down right now as an algorithm for many many of those who are not yet in this studio. this is a podcast of the psyche. i journalist, natalia loseva and my co-host clinical psychologist can not be psychological sciences. mikhail khors is looking into maria's situation and it seems to me that maybe we are gesticulating, but we are saying what someone should finally tell you to ours. wow, a century. great director, diamond, diamonds, ice, moved, lord jurors i will command the parade. i mean you

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strengthen immunity and live lactobacilli to restore microflora two actions in one strengthen the intestines, when you have already achieved a lot, the main thing. do not stop 30 years megafon is just the beginning. thank you for being with us to keep the first day of antibiotics in balance. to lower the temperature so that it rains freely, a headache, so that stihladrin four components against the main symptoms, colds and flu, to tie up the symptoms of a cold. what is important, just the premise of all this, you see you are masculine . yes? there were practically none in the family. and

you would take on the function of a man. well, it happens. well, what to do, yes, when a woman begins to be a man, too, for her children for her family. so, but you took it, but you didn’t take it completely, i mean, i’m a horse and i’ll be like a man, like a woman together, but pull the masculine on myself. yes, but the severity you didn't bring your family. i don't like conflicts at all and don't like them. you are afraid of them. i'm afraid of conflicts. yes, i don’t like conflicts and i’m afraid, these are different things, as i would say that i’m afraid of tangerines. yes, i don't like them, but i'm afraid. yes, somehow. yes, it sounds strange. in fact, once again you are afraid of conflict, because you think that there should be no conflicts, because you think that conflicts are bad. and conflict is not bad and conflict is not good - this is a normal part of life, including families and

it will not work to live life without conflicts. i for some reason michael thought that maybe it had something to do with the childhood of the seas. that's when she was a child, and when she probably waited for these five days of meeting with her parents. you had one and i wanted to be a good girl, so that she was more with her mother, perhaps she was affectionate, but she just sent me somewhere all the time, what does it mean she didn’t hug you? no, she, well, marisha called me no, but here. well, yes, but she is all the time, that is, as if in different rooms, that is , there was no kind of heat. not that is, to the grandmother me or well, that's either a five-day week or three shifts. this is exactly what i remember. it is with horror. yes, this camp. yes, even when , well, at this change of shifts, we did not go home. that is, we went there, i don’t know to my girlfriends, that is, somehow so you do a pancake to your children precisely as a counterbalance. and now, in fact,

when i have so much already, well, a worthy worthy age. now i can understand my mother. yes, she just couldn’t have gone to extremes there, mom didn’t give yourself michael to yourself. she gave birth to herself those people who are in her unloved in this little girl that sits in her they compensate for what she lacked in order to compensate, but they do not compensate, because they did not teach. and how could she teach if she didn’t get it, on the one hand, she saw her mother go to extremes, it’s just that maria went to the other extreme, you understand, from one extreme she threw you into the other, they tried to drown her children in this giving understanding caring love. well, i really love them. yes, but love, she sees what she wanted me to be and in fact. it worked out well. that is,

i gave me an excellent education in children there. yes, that is, and everything, that's all, that's because there are a lot of them. yes, i have one diplomat there, the other is an ecologist, yes, that is, everything that i wanted myself. and it didn’t work out for me, of course, it happens. two, like, you see, what you gave to children is love, giving, tender and caring, but there is also a second kind of love. this is called strict. now, if strict love does not compensate for unbalanced, caring giver, then the construction of relationships the curve is the same as vice versa, if only it is strict, like mother, yes, there, well, she named paris, and everything else. here, yes, another crooked design. but a harmonious construction is a relationship where strict love is balanced, surrendering. well, let there be a giver a little more a few. yes, but when this alone leads to what you have

now received. and this thing is fixed and pretty quickly. if you learn to give your children not only giving love to show, but also strict, limiting love for them too. and for this you need to understand that conflicts that will definitely begin to arise when you show your strict love for them that the conflict is not bad. it's just a normal part of life. she is a possible part of life. yes, it would be better if there were no conflicts, but they exist, and if you are afraid of them in a panic and do everything that if only there was no conflict, then this is again extreme michael, and relations with men can change with mary if she turns the tide and relations here the scheme, the model that she has developed in relations with children. well, as a man

there, too, you should make more demands, you know, because you need to kick men, well, i’m not like that, of course, but there’s less of this acceptance that a man’s husband is a smaller saint. oh, kids, w- dad went to bed, what is it all about? well, this is already in the past, but you can’t close the future for yourself, a spectacular beautiful woman. you are also told to meet and meet. maybe you can find some more, of course, let's give some specific ones, maybe give advice or homework for maria in order to make it clear that we are now with you all your life forward for several years without being idle, because you are most likely to correct relations with children. i am one year old, of course it's not well, not one. yes, some three or four homework assignments that maria will take are just working through. well, the first task, and you stop supplying this family with food. nothing let there be an empty refrigerator.

you see, here i am, this is not small, but an eight-year-old, please, a teenager, maybe myself, or that is, and i should not eat at home or i should not cook food for yourself for a girl change to e, so, okay, for a 15-year-old teenager, if he helps you, uh-huh, they fed three. the refrigerator is empty, but these conflicts you ate my taro from cottage cheese. you are not your story at all. let them decide. they are adults. let them yell at each other. excuse me, like some monkeys yes, that's all there, let them solve their own problems. and that's when you stop feeding them. that's when the value of what you do may be. they will increase, and they may not start demand from you, but polite and affectionately ask. and here, your second task in relation to your wonderful children

is wonderful. i'm sure just a little spoiled. and maybe a lot of spoiled. yes, and it’s clear who so, the second is to stop them in russia. about what , for example. oh, please. please sit down with my demand. change now they require you. and you ask them. well , they will say, it seems to me, no, they said they learned to speak from their mother. they don't have them when and then psychological further punishment. you can punish sexually mature earners , you are discharged to an apartment, you don’t write all the dishes yourself. leave them. if you don't follow my rules, i'll write you out. by the way, this didn't get through. i imagine that this is a monstrosity now for you it sounds and most likely it contradicts. i somehow even know how, until i can. she can't even fit in. it's even news. and you

try to live with this thought, you understand, you have handed over to them all the bait of a locomotive. i don't know all the resources, you understand, you gave children an education. they work. they can film themselves for two apartment, and there to share their curds of the room to get married, as you like. you have given them just beyond measure. and your relationship, well , just believe it will only improve. if you are now separating, and you have every right, moreover, you are obliged to do this, you know why you have at least two more children who are watching, who are looking at this and who can become your support your loving friends michael, i say, now worldly, but you understand that this is not a contradiction with our psychologically. no, it doesn't contradict. let's have the only question here for the children. yes, they will say that we will not go. we are registered here again, but in reality, there is no problem. and now

they do it pretty quickly, but for mary michael herself, we sit down with our children. this is simply unacceptable, and once again admit it is caring for them. this is love for them, because you brought them up in some kind of greenhouse greenhouse condition, where mom, in any snap of their finger, runs and does everything, but reality is arranged differently. may i suggest more a soft option, maybe mary somehow expand her physical space in the apartment. which he has every right to, because i understand that you are a responsible apartment renter to power your daughter out of the room. populate other activities for a teen boy, for example, and for your daughter. i do not know together e girl and girl do not like. now he's better there. you do not think that if you say so directly to the children, but to be offended for life and will never talk to you for a while , explanations for them will be a shock. well maybe be, they need to reasoned, how to tell the rooms periodically?