cold you were like that and i wanted to be a good girl, so that she could be more with her mother, perhaps she was affectionate, but she just sent me somewhere all the time , sent me normally. well, here she is affectionate to me, no, she, well, marisha called me yes , there's one there. and here. well, yes, but she is all the time, that is, as if in different rooms, that is, there was no kind of heat. not that is , for somewhere to my grandmother, or well, either for a five-day week or for three shifts. this is exactly what i remember. it is with horror. yes, this one camp. yes, even when, well, at this change of shifts, we did not go home. that is, we went there, i don’t know to my girlfriends, that is , somehow so damn it, i wanted my children to be exactly the opposite. and now, in fact, when i have so much already, well, a worthy worthy age. now i can understand my mother. yes that she simply could not be there extreme. mom gave herself to you michael she gave birth to herself those

people who are in her unloved in this little girl who is sitting they compensate for what she did not receive, so that compensate, but they do not compensate, because they have not accustomed. and how could she teach, if she did not receive it, on the one hand, she saw mom, the extreme was gone. it’s just that maria went to the other extreme , you know, from one extreme she threw you into another, they tried to drown her children in this giving, understanding, caring love. well, i really love them, yes, but love, uh, no, well, i gave everything that i wanted to have and really. all great. happened. that is, i gave me an excellent education there. children. yes, that is, and everything, that's all, that's because there are a lot of them. yes, i have one diplomat there, the other is an ecologist, yes, that is, everything that i wanted myself. and it didn’t work out for me, of course, it happens. two, like, you see,

what you gave to children is love, giving, tender and caring, but there is also a second kind of love. this is called strict. now, if strict love does not compensate for unbalanced, caring giver, then the construction of relationships is curved just like vice versa, if only strict, like mom, but there, well, she called arisha, and everything else. yes each other another crooked design, but a harmonious design - this is the attitude to distroga love is balanced, surrendering. well , let there be a giver a little more a few. yes, but when that alone leads to what you've got now. and this thing is fixed and pretty quickly. if you learn to give to your children, not only giving love to show, well, strict, limiting out of love for them too. and

for this you need to understand that conflicts that will definitely begin to arise when you show your strict love for them that conflict is not bad. it's just a normal part of life. she is a possible part of life. yes, it would be better if there were no conflicts, but they exist, and if you are afraid of them in a panic and do everything that if only there was no conflict, then this is again an extreme michael, and relations with men can change with mary if she turns the tide and relations here is the scheme of the model that has developed in her relationship with children. well, as a man there, too , you should make more demands, you know, because you need to kick men, well, i'm not like that, of course, but, uh, less of this acceptance that a man is a husband is a smaller saint. oh, kids, w- dad

went to bed, what is it all about? well, this is already in the past; now you don’t close the future for yourself, a spectacular beautiful woman. you are also told to meet and meet. maybe you can find more, of course. let's get some specific, maybe , give advice or homework for maria so that she understands that we are now with you all your life ahead for several years , because relations with children you, most likely, will have to correct for more than one year, of ​​course, it’s not just any three or four homework assignments that maria will take just work out. well, the first task, and you stop supplying this family with food. nothing let there be an empty refrigerator. you see, here i am, this is not small, please, a teenager, maybe by myself , but that is, and i shouldn’t eat at home or i shouldn’t cook food for myself, but you change it for a girl for

e, then, okay, for a 15-year-old teenager, if he helps you, uh-huh fed three. the refrigerator is empty, but these conflicts are you ate my taro curd. you are not your story at all. let them decide. they are adults. let them yell at each other. sorry like monkeys with something. yes, that's all there, let them solve their own problems. these are adults . and that's when you stop feeding them. that's when the value of what you are doing may be. they will increase, and they may not begin to demand from you, but politely kindly ask. and here, your second task in relation to your wonderful children is wonderful. i'm sure just a little spoiled. and maybe a lot of spoiled. yes, and it’s clear who so, the second is to stop them in russia. about what , for example. oh, please. sit, please, with my demand to change. now

they want you. and you ask them. well they will say, it seems to me, no, they were looking for from their mothers learned to speak. they don't have them when and then psychological punishment. it is possible to punish sexually mature earners , you are discharged to an apartment, they will not discharge all the dishes themselves. leave them. if you don't follow my rules, i'll release you. this is it. by the way, i never got burned out and kicked out. i imagine that this is through and through monstrosity now it sounds to you and most likely it contradicts. i somehow even know how, until i can. he can't even contain himself. it's even news. and you try to live with this thought, you understand, you have handed over to them all the bait of a locomotive. i don't know all the resources , you understand, you gave children an education. they work. they can rent themselves for two

an apartment there to share their curds of the room to get married, as they please. you gave them just beyond measure. and your relationship, well , just believe it will only improve. if you are all parrying now, and you have every right to do it, you must know why you have at least two more children who are watching, who are looking at this and who can become your support your loving friends michael i say, now worldly but it is realizing that it does not contradict our psychologically. no, it doesn't contradict. let's have the only question here for the children. yes, they will say that we won't go. we are registered here again , but in fact, there are no problems. and now they do it pretty quickly, but for mary michael, the very thought sits down with her children. this is simply not acceptable. and admit once again it is a concern for them. this is love for them , because you brought them up in some kind

of greenhouse greenhouse condition, where mom, in any snap of their finger, runs and does everything, but reality is arranged differently. can i offer a softer option, maybe maria somehow expand her physical space in the apartment. which he has every right to, because i understand that you are a responsible apartment, tenant, evict your daughter from the room. populate other activities for a teen boy, for example, and for your daughter. i do not know together e girl and girl do not like. now he's better there. you do not think that if you say so, children right uh, offended for life. and when they won't talk to you for a while. for them it will be a shock. well maybe they just need to reason like say by rooms periodically for 10 years of residence. just moved, yes, since you have already taken on the role of a peasant, then take the role of a peasant in this too, but in the one where you ate all your life. can you already begin to become with the processing woman you have alone? when you

take it into the energy sector, do you do it with care? no, here we have everything somehow. well , everything that concerns, well, in principle, upset. i don't bother anyone. that is, there are such everyday conflicts there, who washes there for a long time or someone is the most absent. that is, no one here does not interfere. someone left in the morning. it just happened when you imagine a pandemic . we all settled in a common space, and everyone still has distance learning. and i just managed to fix it all. imagine would like to. sorry for the kids. you can watch, let's talk about a man, then let's go to the kids maria, here's what you need to do in your apartment now. if you imagine that in a week you will meet a new wonderful interesting man and your relationship will develop rapidly harmoniously, and so to speak mutually, and you will already be ready to invite this man to your large apartment. well, in our time it's perfect.

what do you need to do in an apartment in a house and your way of life so that this new man does not run away, like you don’t need an apartment for the previous month, that is, leave a four-room apartment. children imagine children gradually. i understand these are harsh statements. but it's really time to gradually start moving out of the nest, because it's normal for babies to fly out of the nest. yes, they sometimes fly out, they hurt, but this is also normal. but you don’t need to put another man on your hump. if you want to live with a man, let him call you to his apartment, you understand, and as for the children, i don’t know where to say where to tell the children dear, wonderful wonderful. sea children. mom doesn't owe you. she can give you and gives will give and gave a lot, well,

she has no such duty. here, watch this show, please, mom will come home. you are on your knees in front of her. stand up , kiss her shoes and say, mommy. sorry us, please, dear, you are our mother, beloved. thank you for everything. he did something for us. we will try our best to help you love and protect you. guys, it's true, when you grow up, you will have your own children, well, or just life will beat you a little, and life always beats. you will see the feat that your mother performed for you in a completely different way. the main thing is not to be late. it's always good to remember that everything we can fix while we're alive, so that it's not too late, okay, you ask that we address you directly, but it seems to me the situation is worth it. it was a podcast of the psyche. my name is natalya loseva i am a journalist and my co-host clinical psychologist mikhail

khors analyzed a difficult situation, but very vital maria be happy, please. thank you very much.