[000:00:00;00] and to become anchor is such a special device that allows , uh, to enter it with your feet and fix it for further work, so that it is convenient to work, yes, but the only difference here is that he, uh, taking into account these only 28 seconds and twenty- five. it will still be necessary to have time to get out of this anchor, so this training is like that. e, in general, it is aimed at ensuring that he learns to work with what he really uses e in space flight, but taking into account these limitations, you also need to provide yourself with security, weightlessness itself, in any way pilot. she was familiar and could even do more somewhere in time. but when you 're sitting in a bmw on a plane in your office and you're strapped in and you can't really feel it. how a person behaves and in general weightlessness and i remember it was a surprise for me. there are special bags there, 50 kg each, yes, which

, of course, have no weight, but no one canceled the mass of physics, so we push each other. that's when you catch and feel. that's when you catch it, you really start to move , you push off. let's say from the floor of the plane to earth. with us gravity will return the jump back to you, it does not return anything there. we remember the first impression, but i try to push off so that i can reach only four meters, but it seemed to me that he pushed off a lot. i managed to put my hands here, but then when the first conclusion was out of the peak, here, of course, it’s good that the whole floor of insults is mats, because envy is somewhere up there. i understand that in the same place, well, the sirens are coming. yes, what to display first, but also if you are not fixed nearby. you can't do anything pushed off. i understood that somewhere i came from and one of the instructors. well, apparently, we understand, even my experience, er, flight, and still managed to grab me and, say, find me on the ground, so everything is clean in these mats from a height of four.

a meter, if with an overload of two units it occurs almost twice correctly. yes, from eight meters you can hurt yourself and hurt yourself well, so the main task of the testers who are in the cabin, in addition to the fact that they work out and participate in experiments. the same activities. yes some new methods of the program are being developed. they must provide security. first of all, on these planes. uh, there are even commercial flights, in principle, anyone. can e pay money to fly to experience weightlessness and the famous formula-1 drove the plane to shoot commercials. very interesting, in general the work is very interesting program was we carried out 500 in zero gravity. 28 seconds should be enough for me 4

3 seconds one and 8/10 seconds. yes, this is a world record one of the formula-1 teams set and actually. they are in terms of what can be done even cooler. yes, in formula 1 racing. it says 500 in the plan. yes, that is, this is what 500 weightlessness did, and in fact, here, returning to time, yes, boundary time. we managed four people. we got up on the ceiling not with his head. uh, four people were on the ground picking up these are our instructions. well, in general, it was planned that real mechanics would deal with these things? yes, formula 1, but having flown a fact-finding flight. they said for no money we er, not that it was bad, it turns out. stop. yes it was. as a matter of fact, not very good, not very comfortable, therefore, in fact, here i say four. so they raised the car, turned it around 180 ° , removed the wheels, but new wheels were put in

, those that stood upside down put these wheels on, but, uh, docked with the car, the car turned 180 ° and was placed on the bottom. and these people had to ensure, first of all, their safety, which was on the ceiling and all this. yeah, anyway , the wheel, it's heavy. hmm. well, weightlessness. he it’s not so much to really start to lead at overloads twice as much, they were still, as it were, insuring testers, of course, that is , well, in an airplane anyway, it’s necessary to ensure safety. god forbid , something will fly somewhere in the wrong place and quite beautiful , these things are here. both anton shkapper and we continue our conversation with anatoly zagruzny about extreme types of training . i led astronauts to move on to parachute training. for me, it

was always not just interesting; for me, it was always exciting. and when they ask me what the most difficult thing for you was preparing for space flight from all trainings, including extreme ones. naturally, i always say, for me. it was parachute training. well , it's not a secret for anyone that we are pilots, in fact, we don't really like to jump with a parachute. i even have such a hmm saying. we don't even understand. why leave a plane that flies normally, the system works for it. why are we leaving the plane in good condition, even my colleagues. they know, well , the countries who served there in the american army in the european ones. they are those who not a single jump. although he is a professional pilot. i don’t know 800 deck landings there, but i never jumped, they ask us that it’s supposed to be done two jumps a year by a military pilot, so when we came to the detachment, then uh, the first, well, one of the first. that 's right, well, or the first extreme, extreme training was parachute, why is it needed by an astronaut at all. we have nothing to do with parachuting. i say, flying directly into space, it is clear that we are returning under the dome

with a parachute, but we do not control it. we can immediately to say yes, that is, this is already a matter of technique for professional politicians. well, obviously not cosmonauts. why? here you are forcing us to jump. uh, with a parachute. and it got to the point that we did six jumps a day, that is, for a business trip for 3 weeks, somewhere around 70 jumps, or even more. well , actually, if so briefly in the historical background, the first six space flights. uh, well, on russian ships, they ended up in ejection during the descent stage. well, this is when yes, single, when group flights became, just a dilemma, how to catapult the three who are together by descending the vehicles. it turned out that this would be practically impossible. so this is how, uh, you noticed, uh, collective means of rescue are used, that is, uh, a parachute area, it has 1.000 m², 1.2. everything else is triggered when the engine lands softly

landing and so on and here e came to e, as this is the foreground this is psychological preparation. that is, we have, uh, the task of teaching an astronaut to become a parachutist there. yes, to make a paratrooper out of him is such a task, in principle, no, we use . yes, as a means to an end. and the goal is such that the astronaut must be immersed in stressful conditions in the easiest way on earth. that's create these stressful conditions. i will ask this jump there, because it is protracted. it's not easy, yes, when the first jumps. yes, this is a loose concept. well, if from 4.000, it's exactly 2 minutes, well, 60 seconds. yes , depending on the posture and mass of the fall posture and the mass of skydivers. there may be a little correction, but something like this 3.040 seconds 3 km so, uh, immerse the astronauts in these stressful conditions, to teach him to deal with this stress initially at the first stage,

the main task in the future, when the ability to overcome this stress appears, to teach him to work in these stressful conditions. and uh, it is necessary, how to note, that this is not just a parachute jump. yeah, i mean, uh, to uh train skydivers, there are skydiver training programs. there so-called progressive fall. here, uh, the bottom line is, that is, i’ll immediately ask the parachute, there, like a wing, but it separates with two instructors and until the instructors are convinced that this person in their tenacious hands is trainable. yes, he is adequately trained, he fulfills e requirements. which instructors are showing him so far. yes, there give the legs to tighten the legs pick up the hands to simulate the opening of the parachute and so on. they won't let him go. that is, and in stages there are several levels, a person

comes to an independent jump. we have a different task for this preparation. we, on the contrary, have a special parachute yes cooking cosmos, it just means. here are all these aspects, that is, uh, we have the task, on the contrary, is to make the astronaut feel that he is alone. here he is in the boundless sky, to be affected by the maximum possible amount of this stress, if the quantity can be measured, the process somehow happens and happens so that the first jumps, uh, astronaut are made with a round dome. he is truly controlled relative to controlled. that is, you can make u-turns there and so on. well, from the first jump of the cosmonaut, they perform a parachute jump with additional equipment. that is it voice recorder with microphone. which are bred to have a protective helmet and in the process of all stages of the jump, the astronaut, uh, is reporting and uh, to the extent. eh, here are these jumps from simple to complex, we have all types of training

astronaut. it turns out already when the instructor sees there that he is able to switch to the planning shell. he changes to another, uh, type, uh parachute technique, such as a wing, yes, which allows, uh, to minimize the influence of weather conditions and so on, but to ensure safety, nevertheless, the astronaut. he feels he is alone. yes but always he is in instructors. yes, if reporting should still be carried out , certain tasks are being performed. yes, that is , and how to say what you see begins. yes, uh, delays that allow you to just solve these additional tasks are given. eh, they can be cards, there are countless logical mathematical options up to chess studies and so on, or there is another interesting problem

when the red linen ones are laid out. on the ground, the direction of the report is indicated and a binary code is read, which is then is translated into decimals all this time freedom is all during free time is all to pronounce absolutely yes, and moreover, then on the ground they check the correctness of solving this problem, instructors evaluate psychologists' emotional fund. and also i didn’t have time to make the correct decision, because safety is still the main thing in this preparation and at an altitude below 1,000 m. anyway, the astronaut must open the request, so time is, as it were, limited because of this, time must be as it would seem to be in time a lot of i remember your colleague when the clock is ticking. the third powder he produced at 10 seconds. in 3 seconds, he absolutely clearly uttered 10 digits and no one on earth could repeat this business. well, yes,

it works there. uh, when time stretches there on one side, the instructor is sure to jump. he is given nearby, at least two instructors, one of them for free, who films his jump. he starts shooting another helicopter, then nearby. and when we're already ending. we have a jumping day, then there are analyzes, just right, well, our specialists the instructors superimpose what you said on the video that was filmed and, in principle , you can see at that moment something that you saw, because if it stays all the time , even someone managed to robotically make these various figures there, yes, well, first of all, you remember your most interesting assignment. you initially run it in for yourself, in principle, everything is, as it were, interesting. yes, there was a moment when it was very difficult. do you remember such a task - black and red tables that are there on the ground. a lot of numbers are very hard fifteen, there up to one, yes, and alternating.

well, and uh, a difficult task for the earth. and here i have, by the way, on the contrary, i stood records for e, account. yes, this task, and on the ground i didn’t seem to like it in a minute it didn’t fit. well, this is in the initial stages, then, firstly, uh, this is the feeling of stress. yes, and the feeling of danger is always there. well , because if a person does not feel danger when performing a parachute jump, he simply should not be allowed to these things. but here i am not afraid to see him as a psychologist. yes, yes, but uh, was an interesting case where we, uh, in one of the organizations, performed jumps while still in the military, and uh. we have a good tradition of giving a soft toy in the process of free fall to the hero of the day. anniversaries consider the person who has reached some significant figures in crumbs, starting. yes, there are from 100 there and

further there are already 1.200 there, there and so on. well, in the process of free fall, he is given this toy as a keepsake and the whole thing. naturally, it is fixed on video. and how would such a good memory stand. here, in general, local experts. they came up to us and asked that one of the local e, had the anniversary of a thousand jumps there and asked us to organize it. here's a little holiday. well, in general, so that we dismantled the figure on the ground, everyone knew in what place to approach this figure. it's called beautiful. she's a formation, in free fall. several people there , up to twenty, as if, uniting together form something beautiful yes, which can be seen from the ground and on the video very beautifully, and in order to more closely separate some of the people who participated in jump out the helicopter. usually there first. the operator comes out to fix from below. and he has

the possibility of falling due to the fact that he has a special overall such wings, he has. so, as if to see everyone, i separate. yes, the three of us went outside the helicopter, and local specialists separated a small group of three people, and everyone who remained in the cabin had to approach them and agreed. so i'm out. i see that there were my colleagues, as if they were ready to turn around and nod. this is the command for the separation of this entire group, and when i turned around it turned out that i was not observing anyone, then i turned around. to find out how my colleagues who are outside the aircraft feel, i’m already watching videographers. no. as a result, well, it's impossible not to shout there, of course. we look at each other like that. in general, we decided to go back inside the helicopter. and that's when we went back and forth. here

were the eyes of the crew. in general, they reported to the ground that, in principle, the entire group had left. yes, but two for some reason came back. here we are sergei georgy, but in our arsenal such an interesting story. e your first jump, when the recorder is here and everything is hung up. i did everything and said everything as they said. what number jumped there, well, everything is fine, it's safe. and in the evening, when they put it on the big screen. uh, they put uh, sound and video and started showing. well, let's sit and watch. that's how it shows me from the outside, i feel something, i had to say, something once separated, something is making noise there. well i think, well, okay the technician needs to connect this cable. i almost did. well, this one ended, everyone watched, like, maybe again, we'll see, only with sound. but yes, sergey yuryevich malikov is ours. uh, the head of collection says, well, look at the real jump. so he didn't say a single word. i speak. yes, i said, i say for sure, you

heard the noise, this is the first thing. do you want to listen? it was the sound of a helicopter. that is, he wrote, yes, the second one was the noise when you fell later, when you practically opened up. e even considering. i am a professional pilot. yes , i flew so much, as if i’m not afraid of heights, and then i had such stress that i spoke to myself, but it seemed to me that i was talking to a microphone. so he didn't say a single word. so, what are these jumps, well, it’s understandable that they don’t prepare us for parachute jumps like an astronaut, but the psychological barriers are very strong. well, astronauts in the process. that's just what i watch the environment. we now demand so that not e. looking at the video analysis on the video , it was clear where he is, what he is and and how is he? yes, then there is what he does, in what area he performs in general, and how he enters the landing, because there the calculation of the touchdown point is also separate there. here's the landing point.

let's talk about survival explanations. what types of accommodation are there in general, where is a very large part of our work. uh, that is, in general, it is correctly called the preparation of astronauts for actions after landing. e in various e, climatic and geographical zones, that is, the e orbit strip it is clear it runs through almost all possible zones there continents and so on, so the astronaut must be able to. uh, after landing. well, normally, when the landing takes place. clearly, after 20 minutes, the maximum search and rescue force should come up, and help to the right point, yes, which the ballistics calculated there, er, serious composition. search and rescue forces are concentrated there, but there is a possibility that something will go wrong and the possibility is, well, how did it come about? and in general, we began to survive, we got the so-called. uh,

after all of them archipich leonov yes, let 's see, they got to the university point. this is a bolt obstruction 100 km nearest road. after that, they almost died. after that, the decision of the court was made. yes , the apparatus is necessary and equipment in order to improve the course of three days, yes, count the days, uh, directly of a person. this is nasima, an emergency stock, in which it is completed and with which it is always completed , we launch the device. it is just designed to ensure the life of the cosmonauts' activities for three days in any zones, because it is not clear you will land there. you, if anything, do not calculated, it will go, yes, either in the south, or where it is already cold, and so on. and we are currently conducting the following set of trainings. that is, these are trainings on actions after landing in a wooded swampy area in winter, now we are just going through this training cycle. this is training in

the steppe. in winter, it is preparation for action after landing in the desert in summer, when the most difficult conditions are in terms of heat, heat, and so on. this is mountain training and post-landing training and each of these types wear their own peculiarities. eh, as far as mountain training is concerned, this is a feature. eh, such that, in principle, mountains happen, both wooded and deserted by the time the astronauts begin training in the mountains. they, as a rule, went through this kind of training both in the desert and in the forest, so here we are, uh, talking about the features. uh, safe choice. the site, so that nothing would fly from above, not an avalanche , the rules of movement in the mountains would not come down. that is , these are the features and pluses. if, nevertheless , the landing was carried out in the mountain, the astronaut must to understand if search and rescue forces approach with their

equipment there or drop it if it is impossible, rescue equipment approaches there. yes, yes, he must understand how to use this equipment, so there is a search training, climbing training in this sense, that is, as a matter of fact, survival itself. yes, if you speak in slang, uh, there uh passes so conditionally with uh, training in a wooded swampy area. as a rule, we have, in principle, all types except for. uh, sea training. they are two days old. here they must build two shelters according to the cyclogram ; one shelter is there to spend the night in it on the first day. due to the fact that at hand i use the same parachute around. yes, everything that is emitted inside the threshold is absolutely a cyclogram. this is our action plan, which is discussed in advance with the cosmonaut crew. yes,

those who go as part of the crew for such training, they are given a specific task, that you must build such a shelter, all the instructors spent the night. well, uh, another one of such, uh, basic requirements is the autonomy of training, because therefore the astronaut is left to himself, but nevertheless, so that yes, firstly, uh, health is an important factor, especially when the astronaut is already in the crew that starts relatively speaking, there in a year to save health in the end , because a lot has already been invested, so the instructors periodically go out, who check, firstly, the correctness of the construction of these shelters, yes. some recommendations along the way doctors conduct. uh, such a medical examination at the exit. then, naturally, an analysis is made after each workout. well, firstly , the astronauts express their opinion that they

forgot, what they didn’t forget, but if this is some kind of training again, it’s interesting for me not to listen to the recommendations that come for the first time on equipment. i give we draw up a protocol. well, as far as the desert is concerned, there is such a peculiarity, that is, the astronaut must build a shelter and, in fact, do as little as possible. yes? how can this too hard? that's how you want to drink, move naturally, like everything else. we have 6 l yes for one of three, that is, under 2 liters per day, there was an interesting case, when this preparation was just being restored, there was such a significant break. they didn’t spend 13 or 15 years there, and in general, they restored it. once went, uh, the commander of a conditional crew. himself as an instructor. yes, as an instructor should work, as a rule, all our instructors participated in all these types. well, otherwise, how can he, e something, yes, teach us a feature, general preparation

lies in the fact that we say do as i did, yes they did, as i said, so here are our doctors. this six-liter block of water, and not a barrel, was rinsed with alcohol in order to infect, uh. yes, and they forgot to drain this alcohol , they refilled it. yes, in the end. here we go to training. with this tank, we don’t know what is poured in there good or bad. this is bad on topic. the conditions there were well over 40. uh, in general, i was already thirsty and terrible, and moreover, uh, the venue was. e under er, the baikonur summer turned out to be hot. the earth was dried up. yes and these are the capacitors that we taught you to yes, which meant that you can draw water with their help, but they didn’t work at all. and the doctors then were part of the survival departments and , accordingly, as a military association we were military and so on, it played its

role. therefore, we, in order not to hand over ours, we asked for clean water with this. yes yes yes. in general, in the end, uh, drank. one third of everything i lost. yes, yes, yes, well, as if i had to just hold it in my mouth, yes, and spat. i lost 12 kg. here, up to a two-day scheme , too, training was carried out mercilessly from a friend by his boss. what does he say? uh, well, of course the bike. i don't give a damn there to think about the crew. i say there alekseevich did not want to drink. although the lips are swollen, the tongue is swollen. in general, there cracked into space. training now is very hard, scary, and sometimes dangerous. let's think, uh, we 're talking about today's training in 50 years. in fifty years, by some human in

space. i hope the astronauts will the same brave strong courageous people, you know and literate, i would like to see uh, the prospect is like u now uh, well, at the level. yes, there is planning all this business going on, there is the barsian lunar program. i would like this whole thing to take place, because well, if the moon is more or less known on mars, i think that you can have a lot of interesting things for yourself on the rate, but from the point of view. here, cosmonauts. i think that good guys are now in the detachment. wow, highly motivated interested will be sure what the future will be? yes and it's bright, it will be interesting, yes, anatolic, unfortunately, uh, time flies like a space flight. we haven't touched on a lot, so i hope this is only our first meeting. we will meet again, we are talking about other extreme, er, types of training,

cosmonauts and this was the refusal of space history i am anton chicnorov good night friends. this is a podcast of jokes for everyone who does not sleep. again. good night, yes, well, for those who, wait, but i'm right. what's my camera , that's all. i'm just here for this light for sure, i seem to know that a plane is landing on me, as if you know kamaz is definitely coming. that is, you are not my question. who do you work for? such lighting on the rink? when you drive yes, yes, yes, look, okay, let's do it again. let's get started with this podcast of jokes. me: well, i'm glad that some people

suffer from insomnia in a good way. and this time will be spent with us. i have wonderful guests in my studio, connoisseurs of joke keepers, people who know how to tell jokes, and i put them on with pleasure you are mikhail policeman and valery syutkin , that is. actor singer composer not a singer just you know, now lately there have been a lot of different hypostases for different people. that is, as if you forget to call there some very important definition that he is still at that moment also a blogger, for example, and all people, then they are offended. well i hope you don't see. and i also like it when they say, there, uh, an actor. e, tv presenter winner of the crystal drop award. well, you see how now we will start listing galaxy with us i want

start a conversation. you know what's about. uh, in the current realities, they still say, yes, well, a joke, what is it? yes. this is somehow not fashionable. moreover, it is old-fashioned. that is. well, they say some are not just young people and girls. and some direct skeptics of the present time. here the youth says, do you want a joke. you want a joke, because it has become just a joke. just a joke. yes, such a short, uh, joke meme, such a joke, you know, opens and reads to you with the help of a gadget in our childhood. do you remember gadgets? it was the appeal, uh, to the person who carries you yourself has a completely different meaning, and my daughters do it differently, they don’t tell a joke, they say. dad, look, cool, yes, well, yes, read something to tell to play. maybe this reflects, as it were, reality in the

sense that, in particular, young people. yes, she stops communicating with each other earlier. to be honest, let's say, well, my childhood is there. youth is there further e in the yard. yes, when everyone was going it was like, uh, not that cool, like now, he says, the youth was in general, well, it's cool to tell a joke vying. yes, i'm not. listen, i'm tired. yes, i knew everyone there, everyone knew how to tell, and this was a means of understanding memory, you know, how they loved for free and counted in their minds. here is the generation, that is, the girl had to be impressed. you were not supposed to read from the phone, but to tell about the memory from the heart, that is, to prove yourself, and now, just about the girl, to impress. two options, as i remember, are when you can play at least a few songs on the guitar, that is, there in companies. yes bravo band i played the guitar

in the yard. i told you about this from the beatles , our polish heroes then really were like that, that is, well, the guitar, that is, you don’t know how to play. goodbye, but i know jokes, and then there was still such an option. in sports, there were guys who, uh, stretched or something from the bar could portray it is already on, yes, but basically at all times i will say this more all the best. if all the best performers want to answer , be it classical music or frank a sinator, for example, or a karusa. it's not exactly the greatest vocalist. this is the greatest storyteller, because the song is like you wanted to tell something, you know how to tell. listen, you don’t know how to tell , the perfect solfeggio, high, low notes do not take everything, so it seems to me that the anecdote

is still such a safety of communication precisely from eye to eye from the mouth. mouth and what you want to convey, of course, and show how, as it were , you can tell your degree and your own with your erudition of emancipation, by the way, here this occasion. eh, now you understand. why as they say dear, the spoon remembered a joke for dinner, and the joke that is there, there are two of them out of this joke, this is the great yuri nikulin yes, who was also the keeper of jokes. uh, and uh, his club there is a white parrot, so the story is next uh, there is such an anecdote. i'll tell it to you now, so, uh, the company is sitting. well, that is, in some kind of vector, well, let's say, there in the nineteenth, then, yes, we are cavaliers there. so, uh, they are sitting and uh, the new man in this the company is just some kind of hussar, he was introduced there, please, there is passion and everything is there, yes, which means that he

got into the company in this, they sit in a circle and just 244 and all ha-ha-ha-ha there are 78, and like everyone else, they just laugh, and it means that he asks his friend, too, there is some young officer there, damn it, please tell me what is happening, he says, you know, all these people are all, this is society. we love jokes. we love so much love and so often we get together to tell each other. if jokes that already, well, how would everyone they know by heart, and that will not be repeated for a long time. we simply remember them and numbered them. here, let's say. right now, look, here is 302 there ha-ha-ha, he says, this is a very funny anecdote. i'm like, i'll tell you later. he says, you're there, well, that 's how you got used to it, and at some point there was such a deathly silence and the lady next to him stood up, the one sitting next to him brushed his cheeks, got up and left. he sits simply and says what happened to a friend says. listen well, bro, we didn’t tell vulgar jokes in betrayal.

well, here's an old joke. you for sure. you know what he came up with. eh, nikulin, he came up with two sequels. that is , this anecdote means, and everything is the same beginning. eh, this, well, the newcomer this man says, there, 147. complete silence is just dead, and he looks at everyone like that and suddenly. well listen. well, don't get upset. it's just that there are people who know how to tell people, and this is the third option. it's already a joke when he says there 210, yes, and again the silence is rude. he says, well , listen, well, do not tell funny ones. yes you and this, i think, is also correct. you

said that writing jokes or making jokes is a profession. i think this is a story someone is telling. casually, yesterday it was like this, and the customer processed the story. yes, it gives some angle to the other, because agree that sometimes you know the same anecdote , but the person tells adds some little color, and he plays in a completely different way . says it's better. uh toastmaster you will go tomorrow to moscow you will fly. we need to have a wedding. and in this pocket he has a pack of rubles there once, well, as a fee here quickly counts right in his pocket to the touch hmm money. and what about the wedding right in the grandson ha? ha, well, that is, we will not go anywhere further, the budget is small here and i will never forget. i worked in the eighties under the direction of the orchestra

, the main guest performer was mikhail sergeevich boyarsky and mikhal sergeevich. they tell a joke that i know perfectly well, but add a little nuance like this. i would even said the guild our country told the circus. a man comes, says, i am the director of the circus with a new attraction. yes, what kind of rides now no one goes at such a time, you have nothing, for sure, we don’t have any expenses of money. yes, nothing, no need, just hang up, i see, here i satisfy vasya on the air online, as young people say right now, right in the ring 80 women in the evening of the sixty-first division and another 202 for an encore. well, they hang up the poster for the first division, and the city is changing mood went phone calls. word of mouth radios. here, in general, women bought all the tickets for a month in advance, men are also interested, in short, we take a hose, everything hangs. hmm,

they hang down from the amphitheater. to be closer to the action, but our hero at 78 for two before the end, you understand, loses his mind and faints and the mood in the hall changes , there were cries of swindle. return the money. this is our 78 does not suit them. promised 80 swindle director runs out into the arena. ammonia. the hero comes semyon says. vasya, what happened, the hero pyotr mikhailovich didn’t put his mind to it during the day on the run everything was fine the word run. i remembered eduard smolny, these productions, everything could be said at the rehearsal. here's to the run and swindle. he is mikhal sergeevich , of course, he uses our folk and the equivalent of this word is different when he deceives. well,

here's one. well, sorry, it’s also important, of course, the scene and the characters are jokes, that is, we are returning, because here ’s the situation itself, this situation, it’s already comical that, well, as if, if we parse and i also remembered one of well there are enough decent jokes also on this topic, that when a man such an engineer goes home in the subway , he gets out of the subway and stands watching. it's a huge line of men. he's coming. here is a huge queue in his microdistrict, he goes, he looks. to his yard what they give there, he goes farther to his entrance. well, what happens, he goes up to his floor, and there is a line to his apartment. there is a queue, he comes, which means to his apartment. his wife lies on the bed in the bedroom. and in turn. so takes all these men off the subway what's going on? she says can't you see

catastrophe. he told me this. kolya fomenko in kolya fomenko says such an ending, vasya this is some kind of nightmare, some kind of nightmare, but here we touched on something very important. uh, all the jokes in the company are what i told. here comes the settlers. you told on this short on this topic is at the door. you know , let's give such a jewish correct and color anecdote, because this is how odessa is told , his homeland yuri is a man at a funeral. and i don't believe that you left us. i refuse to believe it comrade. please skip. but here, by the way, about uh, national flavor, yes, you see in jokes, it's very important. yes, er, to itself here is this short story.

yes, e did not affect some really quite like that. uh, well, let's say some ethnic issues. that is, from an offensive point of view. i mean, that is, jokes. you need to be able to tell, as it were, but also listen to them, because there were a lot in soviet times. remember the jokes were about the chukchi. yes, that is , in general, how did it happen? what , apparently, the development of these lands and so on, let's go meteorologists, there's some, uh, drillers and so forth laying bam there and so on and so forth. that is, some of these cold ones. uh, well, some siberian recipes. that is, these jokes about chuk appeared here, what is there? well, who lived there to the south, and so on, that's all in our time. now they are in a group, however, you will not meet at all. yeah, i can't even remember any of them. and i why why because eh, now here in the winter i always remember this anecdote. so, e is coming, so a large settlement is coming, so chubchik

to your shaman. he is there with this, it means that there is a tambourine there, it means that something conjures everything with a deer paw, beats this tambourine, they come and say shaman, please tell me, here is the winter, cold is coming, it will store a lot of brushwood or all the same. we'll somehow make it there, but not so cold, and like, everything will be fine, that the winter will be warm. she will be cold brushwood. no, they will freeze, in general, there will be more claims against me. and there i will say that it will be cold, well, they will collect a lot of brushwood. well, warm, but less will remain. you can later, as if in the spring we’ll burn the pan and think like this, ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, i’ll say that it will be very cold , ah-ah-ah-ah-ah such, in general, spirits say that the winter will be fierce, in general, i’m going to be a nightmare. a lot of brushwood, they rushed about everything. they ran out there, which means that the tambourine was put aside this deer paw and i think, in fact, what kind of winter it will be, i’ll go to meteorologists,

i’ll ask once about skis. everything went. so he comes there, so this yurt is standing. there is a yaranga. this is how he comes. this is a fellow meteorologist. so oh great. shaman yes hello you will have tea. he is like that, but he took tea there, why did he come? he says fellow meteorologist. and tell me this year, what kind of winter will be cold there, like or there or what kind of oh, i don’t know chukchi for a long time, this year will be a very cold winter. very much he says, well, thanks there for what the comrades said. and how and how do you know, this is me, well, how would i have spirits there, everything is there, such a tambourine. yes, it's very easy to come here through the window. as long as you see chuhchi. they collect a lot of brushwood, which means it is very cold. yes, we have not only the chukchi north. do you remember the era of total shortages, when any items, uh, consumer goods from czechoslovakia

from the german democratic republic were especially valued . by that time, here are kochev boots, shops, there is nothing, says i need a toilet, says, they speak german, german . there is, not german means. well, let's give him two sticks, just two sticks and instructions, he reads the instructions. and what does that say? read on one rely that the wind did not blow away so, and the second was a huge number of wolves always jokes, that is, a jewish theme, there , and so on and so forth, because there are many and good storytellers. yes, and very much like people, this is all normal. yes, and , accordingly, there were colorful jokes, both about sternum and armenian there. the radio that became separate there is history. yes, there are armenian jokes stirlitz daev and sing. no-no-no, i mean now. i 'm talking now, just about all sorts of national

things. but partly anecdotes, of course, but it was special when it was in soviet times. remember there when they were joking, what's there for an anecdote can be given there for some years. yes , it's kind of a funny joke. well, somewhere in the seven they started talking there for 12 years, yes, which was going there, then they told everything in the kitchen, but still this is it. uh, how would people continue to do this. yes, this is how things have changed. what do you think, now, uh, it has become open, that is, when in soviet times there, uh, these times were told here, anyway, it always remains, in principle, this is an example of jewish and all some kind of short guru, i consider him mine gourmet. not alone zhmaske always i say turn to me. in any case , valera is always so fond of everything. a short concert a play a book anecdote a course of treatment everything is short and so it all characterizes such a fishery, how did you meet

your wife here i don’t blame anyone for anything. here is such an intonation of a joke and you immediately understand, but i really like these short jokes in minsk, when the doctor makes my head spin, and i see i see, yes, or how they ignore me and do not notice so the next or when the doctor is there. it hurts me a woman came to the doctor and were here. you here he says, let's undress, let's see. where do i put my clothes? yes, put it on my bag, and when i have a doctor, i have pain, oh, it hurts here. oh, my hand hurts here. give me a broken finger. well, look, for example, medical yes, these are all jokes. well, why because, well, let's say all people. yes, there is somehow more or less degree, everyone gets sick. yes, that is, well, an absolutely healthy person probably does not exist. yes and so, it seems to me that, probably, this allows somehow. still, these are a joke, yes, and in any

humorous stories, usually people. laughs when they don't associate themselves with it. that is, for him, this is a story about someone he has such a familiar friend there. and so, as it is with doctors. yes , they intersect there since childhood, they go there and do vaccinations, and so on and so forth. it seems to me that such a large number of jokes on a medical topic is due to the fact that here is a person. maybe, as it were, well, still calmly laugh. uh, roughly speaking about the protectors themselves, but how to combine stylish ones? it would seem that i really liked a man comes to the dentist, the doctor says. i have a problem's. what yellow teeth are yellow teeth. come on, m-m oh green newspaper you know such unexpected things for which i love jokes, but wait, but fuck, man, in short, he says.

do you know doctor? my stomach hurts so much, just some kind of nightmare m. pigeons that i didn’t eat a dove, and you ate the head of a dove, i didn’t eat it. and you ate the head of a naked pigeon, damn it, in anything i was a speech therapist, i did my best to help , at least yes, with medical jokes. uh, a huge number of general professional there are a lot of anecdotes, because there are a huge number of musical anecdotes about theater musicians, a lot and very often very often, especially people related to the profession. yes, they are , as in the case, there with the musicians. they are short anecdotes that i already knew, they tell with special gusto i draw the whole exhibition. that is, they

immerse you so much, in general, what is happening. you know, there is a little, theatrical tales, real theatrical tales, and which are then told. like a joke, but it was right there in the theater and even there are people who have seen these tales, and you know what else there are jokes on. i have several of these that have been with me virtually all my life. i remember zhenya morgulis telling me the polar. i know that you love to collect musical jokes. i really collected just such musical ones in order to spend the evening well in my environment. i'll throw you one musical anecdote, a son comes from school and his father says to his father. sorry two balls. today he said, in what subject in zoology. what are two points? well, you know, they asked who has the biggest balls, well, i said that the elephant, well , that's right, son. it makes sense, it's big. yes, it turned out dad that he got a job and a deuce i

got the boys science running, live a century, study here he wrote such slow waltzes. musical margulis shulevich threw a big hello to everyone when the son comes to his father and says, dad, what is incompetence and indifference. he says, i don’t know, i don’t give a damn, and about musical uh, well, one of the most, probably, old ones when uh, well friends are going one says, and i'm not going to the opera with you. tonight says why are you the premiere? well, he tells me yesterday rabinovich got drunk, and that's nonsense. and this, as immediately after e, favorite topic after all - this association gave you clinging to some detail. she immediately works your memory, and he flies out when he says, e company of men drove his wife yesterday, put on a cult, along the way,

no, a warning. there is eugene onegin full house full house and then the jew leans over to the neighbor and says. no, i understand . please forgive me, but the lensky jew, no, not a jew. excuse me, but the nanny is jewish. yes, yes, jewess, bravo nanny is one of the best in recent years, i state. i don’t even know, uh, what to ask you, dear viewers, did your sleep pass or, on the contrary, you wanted to sleep, and most importantly, that after our program, after this nightly podcast, you were in a good mood. tell jokes. collect jokes. and we will try to keep it. uh, together with you them for posterity. good night.