if there is support, that is, if you go somewhere with someone, then at least someone is there. he can orient, probably suggest somehow. support who supported you before his sister? mostly 16 years old, when they made the decision to leave, no. i can make the decision of my life myself, you really can. what was your relationship with your older sister like too? this is

just my fantasy, but i want to ask you to think about it. maybe some slightly different form. the older sister according to your feelings. that's how you felt yourself next to him and how you felt next to your sister have something in common, but a feeling of experiences. i have a feeling that i owe something here and there. what were you supposed to do with your sister? should not upset her , should do something permanent, so that she feels good, so that yes, even just doing something around the house. that is, i can’t just be, i have to do something all the time. i can't just be a younger sister, they said very important things. i would like to stop there. i

can't just be. what do you feel when you are you saying this? you feel, you feel, because this pain just returns you to that state of yours. where did you run from? and if you run away from it, then regardless of the mexican armenian, whoever he is, he will use precisely your desire to escape. and, of course, roses on the bed, a moonlit date, i don't know romantic meetings there. at the hotel. all this is just some kind of analgesic for the pain that you experienced. the most important thing today is to see it and stop running away from it. i can't just be. remember the child who lives in these conditions. i

remember when i found out that my mother was paying something for me in the kindergarten there, yes. there is also monthly. this is the fee when the child goes to kindergarten, and i had such a feeling of guilt because of this, as if. why are you even interested in playing someone, turns out mom works three jobs to pay me to go there. did you hear that from your sister? not a sister lived anymore, you heard it from mom or from someone,

but i was at home, i remember. and well, one of the relatives? yes, someone said it to you. maybe someone just said, that is, i found out, it was by accident, or maybe, my mother and her friends said that she was lying, that she needed to pay for the garden for the next month for the child. or maybe there was nothing or something else. mom always worked. there, she worked at two schools, hosted tutoring and mopped floors. that is , today i think, lord, well, it works so much that i then went to kindergarten. i can not go there just so that my mother can rest more, baby. such a thought, uh such an idea , usually forms an attitude in the child, with which he then goes through life for a long, long time and

this idea that i can’t just be, i have to somehow justify my existence. it’s as if i take a slightly out of place here, if i occupy it, then it seems to create some kind of awkwardness for other people, and then we begin to create some kind of additional value, and we try to adapt to other people. it looks like this is what you did. also, your exit, well , let's call it marriage is very similar to an attempt to relieve the burden on these people. well, here i am married and no need to worry about me anymore, no need to worry anymore. and of course, then it is very scary for them to admit that your choice was wrong. what are you thinking right now or what? do you feel now? as they say unpleasant, right? it's all my own

fault, i didn't say that. i seem to be watching so you don't hear. you perceive all this through a prism. again, i'm to blame. there is no guilt here, there are no guilty ones. to face the truth is to get the opportunity to take responsibility the only thing and a form of life in which not a psychopath, not an abuser, not a tyrant, is not capable of, uh, using his methods with you. this form of life is called responsibility. you see, after all, the victim, the tyrant or the abuser, always has hope for a fairy tale, the hope that he will change, and everything will be fine, the hope that now i will change a little, and he will definitely become better. he will love me there

more, better love differently, but this hope takes away your strength. the strength is always the hopelessness the strength is always in your mind that no matter where you are, you are in able to change your life. and most importantly, after all, you have enough years to not live up to expectations or justify the investment of your mother or your sister. now you can definitely just be. and it's not sentimental. guilt is what got you there. and they will drive you further if you continue to look like that. now you have this very life of yours, with which you are free to do, taking responsibility for it. they share with someone freely to do everything with her,

anything. with you we are psychologist sergey on ourselves and psychologist psychotherapist tatyana krasnovskaya. today we have guests olga and we are listening to her story so that you can now say a little more clearly. tell me the same story, but as if you were telling. here is the story of olga, who, accordingly, met the arab prince, went and looked . she did not like it, she returned. otherwise , you can change it right now. when , for example, i met, i moved there and at the first meeting there were situations when i something did not like, when i was hurt unpleasantly. then at that moment i had

friends, yes, and i would have gone to the girls. and let's say i would have found a job, i would have started working somewhere to earn money myself. would become, independently met someone else. maybe some possibilities. yes, that's what to say to go somewhere to fly somewhere. i suggest that you rethink this story in the subjunctive, as it would be, without the subjunctive mood. i suggest you look at it. and what it was, but a little bit from a different angle. i was 30 small i decided to check the taste. what is for real? oriental tale, i found myself an arab prince. i went and uh, passion married him to the desert on the road, and then we began to live there, do not know dubai as a result. i realized that this is not mine. i turned around and left. and this story is completely

different. and then this story is integrated into your consciousness. as your experience, there is no person who is to blame for everything and there is no you who got out. because an attempt to shift this responsibility onto him. this speaks of that you are unable to bear your own responsibility. i know a dramatic story is much more interesting for girlfriends and for most psychologists. it's going to be much more interesting, but those are the 2 3 elements that we noticed now, from changing you when i asked you to talk about history to when i asked you to feel what is happening to you at this moment. and when you said that you face the truth. that's the elements of growing up. any other form of arabic script will only exacerbate the patterns of your history.

your childish attitude. and make you. well , as if they are not capable of relationships. but in front of me sits an adult beautiful woman, and who, in general, has her whole life ahead of her. all that matters is just unwind and see. it's different. it can be assumed that this position is where you are not a victim, he is not an abuser. and in general, the circumstances have developed. otherwise, as you wish. she seems to make this position make you more confident and stronger, and makes you a directly strong woman. what about your relationship now? not with him in general with other men not yet. don't lay them down, because you don't build them, there is a man around you. while there is no i do not want to have been attempts. yes, but when it's all for some reason,

even the slightest questions hello where are you perceived by me like that, that is, everything seemed to me. everything, he controls me, even begins to perceive care as control, of course. it seems to me that it all starts right away , i immediately cut it off. that is, either you know, or everything, or you know nothing, i will tell you, i will reveal such a secret, when many years ago sms messages were paid. well, they are now paid, but then there were no alternative forms. ah, the cellular company, they made most of their money on text messages. hi where are you? all people control each other. the question is not who controls you, the question is, but lie down. are you called under this control or not? you can quite calmly give this control, you can take this control back, and you need

to observe this boundary that you set in these relations. yes, it is important for you to distance yourself now to take responsibility for what you can take? well, for example, there work is your activity, your creativity is your health, if you want to do business conditionally. yes, but you understand, that's my responsibility for her. i will never give it to anyone , then it will become a support for you. in any relationship when you build a bridge based on another person, you are doomed to failure, because no one on the other side is going to hold anything. and so the bridge is always from yourself to yourself, just from yourself today to yourself through guess a year. for me, this story is still, probably, a little bit about permission, or what ? yes, right in the first place, probably,

you should allow yourself to take your place property. allow yourself to be and then, if you have the truth. the solution is the desire to build relationships. that is, yes , it is in this authorship. i just eat it is very important. thank you very much for yourself these few minutes of our conversation. well, thank you for dedicating this area, which i did not think at all. i thought the reason another is either in me that i am not or in him, but it turns out that i ran it from myself. may i ask you at the end? oh, and what kind of relationship would you like later, when

you already want a relationship, what kind of relationship would you still want us to understand and , well, support each other's communication, complement each other in some way. love, of course. i wanted to eat now, i will train to be, and then train to be hungry. what does the ideal man look like, in your opinion, here is your man who will ideal women for you? the ideal man doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and doesn't exist. uh, loving

faithful in fairy tales yes, the author is always caring , purposeful, so that he has self-realization, his favorite thing, so that yes , self-fulfilled, so that he is interesting. educated love beauty care will you be interesting? what will you do to be interesting to such a man? to get to know the world, to discover some new cultures, to find out what they are interested in, how the world lives, so many different cultures

of art. it greatly expands the worldview. i just wanted to ask you, by the way, in what language did you communicate with that young man. english and a little bit of arabic, you know english, yes, i learned arabic, i can understand something, what they say, well, it's time. so to say words, after all, it is quite difficult, but such, and the language barrier is difficult to sort things out, it is difficult to show a sense of emotion. yes, that is something to prove some kind of emotional point of view. you understand that you were hitting some kind of wall, that is, it turns out. here is this one the wall and emotions are coming back. here, as it were , like this. and what did you do then?

okay, everything rushed to reach out and say in russian sometimes yes it’s difficult to explain to a person so that he understands that you feel something, and when in english or there is english arabic, it’s a billion times harder, of course, it ’s just like you know too , such a basic problem of almost all family. on the one hand, this makes a family. uh, it's easier because people think, well, it's better to remain silent than to make a fuss. yes, because otherwise it will cause not that thrice, but at the same time it often just leads to the fact that we suppress our own emotions , which well, they are directed inward, become auto-aggressive and destroy us . in spanish, then i don’t know how to learn spanish well at first, but at the same time

, you know everything, huh? now you are talking, and i just have such a kind of recommendation for you, in fact, you can continue to study arabic language and arabic culture in order to understand the beauty and historicity and fundamental nature of these laws, and not evaluate them like that fool who a misunderstood them and absolutely wrong for you, but it will definitely make you very interesting. thank you, thank you. and can i ask the last question, and so i really count on an honest answer. how are you? you think, you feel, and you are the way you are, uh, it's possible to love. it seems to me that i am so nasty, i have not just a character. and what you, but it seems to me that there is still such

a person who can. walk, what will you do do you have some kind of plan, how will you? to deal with this something has become clearer, probably worth it. love yourself the way you are. primarily interesting to the other person. thank you thank you very much. thank you for such an honest conversation. it was a podcast triggers. we were with you sergey on ourselves at tatyana krasnovskaya psychology and today we sorted out the story of olga and her problems.

hello this is a podcast of letters i have in visiting people's artist marina tsvetaeva prize winner svetlana kryuchkova hello larochka i am very glad to see you. i allow myself to call myself a larochka, because we have known each other for a very long time , you were just graduating then, the institute is true. just gave birth, mitya her eldest. i remember that you still have a reflex, you carried a bottle of some sandwiches with you, and you told me everything time it gave, but today is the program. unfortunately, well, you have to give me your word that you will come to me, because i want to talk. about the great you, today we will talk about the great tsvetaeva, who you know is because today, of course, no one else is online. eh, and so, as

it were not very decent. i said it, shut up. i know for sure that this great mother is in demand with your popularity with your popularity. with that love, uh, the audience for you, your mitya was primary for you - your son. i remember these little letters on your door, so as not to forget the papilla there, so that this is all, i remember all this, how to put it all in myself, because you are such a person. here, look, you said in advance you marina yes , now you must explain this. here you have to explain this to the viewer, because there's nothing to be done, despite the fact that so many years have passed, of course, everyone is interested in who she loved. did she really love everyone, did she love children or did not love them, but was she able to save her daughter, or is it fate? so i want to see you today and only from you. i want to hear these answers. and i not just draw this parallel. yes, yes, yes, you're right, great mother, and you still

managed to tell the world that and we lived at some time when everything fell from the sky, too, not to say. and how busy you've been. and that i don’t hear time, no one helped you. and that yura the kingdom of heaven was in the hospital, and you ran there with a huge belly, then it was all the time with heart attacks and yourself what didn’t happen to you? this is all a parallel, but to tsvetaeva, please, i immediately find her words right away. yes, she writes, poems themselves are looking for me and in such abundance that i don’t directly know what to write, that you can’t throw it at the table and suddenly the whole quatrain is ready while squeezing the last one in washing a shirt or feverishly rummaging in a bag, gaining exactly 50 kopecks. and sometimes i write like this on the right side of the page, some sticks, on the left and others, the hand flies from one place to another, flies around the page, do not forget to catch hold of the hand

is not enough. you say mother, she was a wonderful mother. she, unfortunately, was forced to deal with the life that she could not stand it completely others adore. here you, for example, between rehearsals and performances directly adored this life. yes, she went straight. well , of course, dull, for example, she simply did not study akhmatova, but she was not very healthy. and marina, forgive me , cleaned so many potatoes that her hands were working, they were not the hands of an intellectual poet. these were working hands, she washed floors, washed beams, cut down, dragged, heavy females went for milk 10 with all this, she took care of the children, but poetry lived in her. here why didn't i do it, already, in general, love

was through the word. to all her beloved, both real and fantasized, she had all her love. that's just through her word through her poetry without love. she was a terrible solitary person, the inner one was scared in a lonely wind. victoria the porter writes that her inner world, closed to others, opened up too early. the loneliness of a poet among non-poets, obrossky says, the better the poet, the more terrible the loneliness. she was very lonely. look, her whole life was shared into three periods of anticipation and love. she said so herself, yes, premonition loves action, love and memories of love. she talked about all people, and the action for the face from five years to 75. it's very nice. here she writes. i say before death. it's not enough for me to write

poetry. i need something. at least someone to love at every hour of the day and night, one star for me does not outshine the other, and rightly so. why then did god have to create a full sky of stars, but she has the element, there are confirming ones, i wrote on the slate board on on the leaves of the ropes, slopped on the river and on the sea sand with skates, using the ring on the glass and on the trunks, which are hundreds of winters and finally, that was all. it is known that you love your beloved beloved, signed the heavenly rainbow, as i wanted everyone to bloom for centuries with me under my fingers, and how then he bowed his forehead crosswise on the table, crossed out the name, but you are squeezed in the hand of a corrupt arctic fox. are you stinging my heart

untouched by me inside. the faces you will survive on the tablets had a lot of fantasy, but these her sufferings, if they weren’t there, but such a great one would be born. no, of course. no, she originally was. look, please, please, please, all her photos. you see her somewhere, you never smile. well , i didn't see any ugly. nowhere smiling like that. ah, a slight smile. and here it is, please. see how she felt. we can invent anything, but i always read exactly the words that the person himself wrote, and you can also call poems letters. i even got to forty and i didn't have a man who loved me, found the most. why does everyone have me, i don’t need my fire, nobody needs it, you can’t cook porridge on it. svetlana, she

said to herself that instead of blood, her soul and the front said that she was an absolutely naked soul. this is not a front. said it was marina who called herself she spoke, and she didn't say what she had left for years. yes, just ryazan she said that. i am a naked soul, not blood flows in my veins. oh soul. i taught my soul to live outside the windows. i looked at her through the window all my life, i didn’t let her into the house, just as they don’t let me in, they don’t take the yard into the house a dog or a delightful bird i made my soul my home, but never the home of my soul. i’m absent in my life, i’m not at home, and my soul said it’s pain, plus everything, and i can imagine the rest, but who would she be with from her

men. she would be happy, she was happy, with whom for a short time, it was konstantin alexandrovich and i even life, well , not by the end of my life for 23 years. it's been 20 years. he was 28 and she was 30. uh, three years older she called him my boy. yes, it doesn't matter. the most important thing in another thing is that that she was older. e, she was a front to her in order to fall in love at one time , she needed to regret, and the cipher had something to live for when they met, he committed suicide, brother, his mother could not stand it and also committed suicide. he suffered from tuberculosis. what else does marina need , she picked up, as anastasia tsvetaeva writes , he went into her hands, like a quiet dove, she

immediately grabbed him. this is the eleventh year that i was lucky to be treated with koumiss at the usinevanovsky plant. it was all very good. but it was too early too soon. yes i wanted listen, she did not believe that later sergei and the front. uh, to whom i served and in his defense i wrote a letter to beria, i know how dangerous it is, that is, until the end of her life she took care of and loved and cared for. but look what she writes to seryozha to her irony. she was a hyper responsible person. i say again duty for her was higher than passion in the seventeenth year. she doesn't know if he's alive or dead. she writes to her in her notebook. if god does this miracle, he will leave you alive and i will follow you like a dog. it was an oath of allegiance which she never violated, and in the thirty

-eighth year about her, going to follow her husband to the soviet union, she wrote, so i'll go like a dog. it was 17 years old, it will be she never betrayed him and she said that he is the best person of all only with him i can live, as i live completely free, he was the only person who understood her, understood, loved and was not afraid of its immensity. for some reason , it seemed to them all that she needed something from them to marry, or something, she wants for them. so you imagine that you are a simple person and genius. yes, i needed a spark, and more they were not what they were needed for. this is a podcast of letters, and we continue to talk about marina tsvetaeva and in general, what is love for marina, what is it? she says if she

's talking about love, let's say a poem. i would like to live in my own small town, it ends. and maybe you would n't even love me, because love for her is love. naturally for children, for old people and poets, love is like a living disinterested need of the soul, needing a little. live only be and do not take your hands and talk to me talk, at least occasionally more is not needed for her love is understanding, you understand? here, understanding is love, as far as gender is concerned, girlish, since you have already started the world. please tell me so far , yes, and here is how she does her e men. loved, pitied, compassionate. and with what attention did she treat them? i still return to the topic of children. sorry, i'm only talking about my son. that's

when she had already decided. it wasn’t suicide, yes, how did she hang this son on her son, could you explain that mom is already ah? tired tired. no, she is not said something. explain it to explain anything about mom. shouldn't have had to explain anything to the point in that she's not there around for me. it's just incomprehensible to him purr. forgive me, but it could get worse. i am seriously ill. this is no longer i love you, madly understand that i could no longer live tell dad and alya if you see that you loved them until the last minute and explain that you got into a dead end. it's a death note thing. but as for her death, darling. i want to tell you. we have the largest specialist in the study of life in our city creativity saint irma viktorovna kudrova

is the only person admitted to the archives of the nkvd saint there is no clarity about her suicide. no middle. i was repeatedly in elabuga, i was in this house of brazilians in this half, where marina lived, with moore i saw this beam, on which she hanged herself. this is a beam for me like this so that i hang myself on it. i need to wear it around my neck. i need to bend something, bend my knees, and for someone to tighten me, because if the rope starts to choke here, a person starts to twitch and gets up on the floor. it was impossible to hang yourself there . he didn't interfere. in that case, the question must be very complicated, and i don't think that it should be touched now, because it is

only complicated there. i want to return about love first, then to the children. eh, everything, in the lines , everything in the line, they are written in a hurry , heavy from grief. no, between love and love, my moment, my hour, my day, my year, my century, nothing was born without love, so very often she invented this love for herself, for example, well, rilke is rilki. by the way, tell me, what is this value. but what she came up with, for example , a plug, so it's generally funny in some year. uh, there were a lot of people at some party. she didn't pay attention to the man at all. well, absolutely, but he, of course, is tsvetaeva and he, of course, wrote her a letter. and what

a poor unfortunate man he is, yes, yes, he is sick with tuberculosis and he was abandoned by his bride. marina responded, as she could, as best she could, she alone writes to him. a letter, if one could plunge one's hand into the soul, as into the sea. you would remove a hand full of you. she doesn’t know what he looks like, you know, but she writes, but she writes, she writes to ricky, too, she never met them, but after a while she began to write to him that dreaming about sleeping with him dreaming that his head is a fantasy, but i want to tell you what i’m talking about. the thing is that the most important thing, uh, these were hers . but then, as a result , brilliant poems were born masterpieces, she writes a cycle of poems to an orphan. finally, i met the right person in

me with a mortal. i needed and please lines for bringing the palm of this hand to me immediately. so that for you in the fire, and then it turns out that it would be necessary , which there was no dream, but there was a sanatorium boredom, there was a desire to come to paris and get to mont parnassus in a cafe where the writers gathered. and marina could not stand these parties, and having understood this, she had already written a cycle. she puts an epigraph. uh, an excerpt from a pattershan poem. the little one walked. she was very smart and was walking down the street. the little one turned blue and trembled all over. it's you , igor, the old woman walked down the street, took pity on the orphan. laughs at herself. the same story was with bakhakh, which and here's about the relka. here

she writes rilke pasternak dasternak. here, too, e echoes. look, they are there when they first met, and they had nothing to say. they were all strangers, nothing happened, but again, through a word through letters to marina, the most important thing for her was not a meeting. do not bother me to love you, because she could come up with something that a person was not enough for her, as they write a curly love of a person for nature for beauty verses, so that here is this image to create a higher sample. everything else must be thought, but nonetheless. all the same, she wrote all her life for a while, she fell in love with those who were not equal in strength, she met only rilki and pasternak of one letter six months before his death, another invisible, not only in poetic strength, she could go into cries. she didn't go. she

was afraid of meetings, because he was a real person, he turned out to be completely different from what he was in dreams. and here, and she, for example, wrote. pasternak two poems usually read all the distances verst and mile quarreled us, quarreled, i don’t read it, she’s drunk, the hedgehog knows, and he has two short poems in a world where everything is hunched up, i know one is equivalent to me in a world where you want so much, i know one is equivalent to me in the world, where everything is mold and ivy, i know one you are equal to me, and the second poem and vov shinorov is written, where now there is a small holy-eating center, which was created before my eyes and we also helped a little ivanechka harry. it was created by a

marina specialist in the czech republic and everything about us was, uh, at the station and there there are poles, and once there were a little bit different one of these poles. she called you if leonidovich talk. it was with him that i went to talk to him, but again, loneliness, kudrovo said a brilliant thing. we were lucky that marina did not have interlocutors. she wrote everything down. this is ingenious. but she writes eight lines literally parsnip from the last two lines. my heart sinks every time a russian bows from me to niva where a woman is stagnant friend rains outside my window troubles and blessed hearts. you are in the wake of rain and trouble that homer is in hexameter, give me your hand on the whole world here of my resentment. she was a hyper responsible hyper. she was in charge of

her husband when this story happened. this is her only love, as she said, the only earthly love with radivich. she borodevich lay in the hospital instead of beating the thresholds. uh, with the head doctors to look for medicines. well, she could already have some real help to him, yes, uh, offer you guys a little bit of it. i'm a genius. as i understand it, the actions of an absolute person are usually impossible and impossible, but the time for yourself is now how to project it, because we didn’t live then, we don’t know anything about this nightmare about a girl who grew up with maids with cooks and so on. and suddenly i want to say this about people. imagine her life as a saffron and

with children marina is a cook, marina is a nurse, marina is a cleaning lady marina is a friend. and where is the marina of the woman, where is she so srazievich, whom she called my only earthly love and the two best things that she wrote from her, in general better love lyrics. they were written by constantine were again yesterday's puema of the mountain, and along it the end of the mountain. he has a symbol of happiness, she lived in laughter. at the very top. here was the upper mountain itself, and it even had a room at the top of this small balcony. we were there, we were there. she felt with him, not a woman. she felt with him, finally a woman a second. you talk like you're not a woman. listen, i remember those times, she is

really a genius, maybe then, such as marina, god forgive me, you shouldn't have given birth. oh no, look, but i remember the times when we helped you pack yura's suitcase because you were filming. this is only the states of the performance. but you were enough for all this nonsense. i'm not a genius. i'm not a genius, can i read excerpts from two letters, 31 letters are left, uh, the one that radishcheva wrote and she asked for this woman's document went to destroy all the letters to our happiness, it was not destroyed and handed over a number in due time. here she writes everything clearly. when it, by the way, when she was nine now asked about tsvetaeva repeatedly. he answered one count the verses. everything is written there. he didn't say anything. very, when you don’t need to tell anything, friend, you brought

me back to the life in which i tried so many times and still didn’t manage to live for an hour. you did a miracle on me, for the first time i felt the unity of heaven and earth, maybe for the first time. i still want to take happiness, and not sweat, and not let it be, and not the abyss. people supported my split in me. it was cruel. it was necessary to either heal or kill. you just loved me. i told you to have a soul. you told me there is life. you are mine salvation from both death and life, you are life. lord, forgive me for this happiness. and another letter. i definitely have, uh, letter a and fron voloshin, what is it your time? well, how is it possible that she was married, but she was

married, you can still be absolutely carnal. so to say e filling. may i read it now? here is a letter to radishchevich, and then i will tell you about iphones and about this letter voloshin. well, i also stumbled and made a mistake in 2007. i don't repeat this anymore. here she writes to him you are absolutely a lawyer holy you absolutely my videos my night is my happiness, my passion is now lie down and take you to me. at first it will be like this my head on your shoulder. you say something, laugh, take your hand to your lips, take it away. no, you don't understand your lips on mine read and remember close your eyes and remember your hand on my chest. remember the touch of the lips of the chest. and then we will laugh and talk and fall asleep, and when i

kiss you at night through a dream, you are gentle and immediately reach out to me. although you won’t open your eyes, love me, i’m looking for my ardently, dear. and you also said words to me that i had never heard before you, a whole new sky collapsed on my shoulders. i always wanted to love, always passionately dreamed of obeying, believing to be out of my will, to be in reliable and gentle hands, weakly held from what was leaving, did not love, admired from that, was leaving. i just didn't belong to anyone. and here is the most important thing - the words. this is the fifteenth letter, dear friend, our whole meeting is on the truth. this is its only meaning and value. i don't for one hour won't you be with you what i am

there is, even if this way, i will lose you and preventive. you said you will never leave. don't offend. once again, do not leave without saying goodbye, appoint. me date day any day any hour. i need to say a few words to you for a century, as before death this is not denied. after this fight. we were the end. so about him dedicated a. and i won't be anyone's dedicated to him i don't know, my dear max the only person i can tell you, of course, no, it's not her. now i'll tell you everything. well larisa, he left determined. hello, well, study, and then it happened. here is the story. it was his friend konstantin who was a slavych. this is not just some vulgar dulter. it really was. power in

a relationship makes it happen. and what finds marina never lied to. she left the house. and how embarrassing it was for him. i would say marina is a stove. yes, you need all the time in her stone is nonsense. listen to me, he came and felt like crazy, and he said to her oh, and you know, i also have love. i also fell in love, and offended by marina, he sent a letter to voloshin, where was this one already terrible phrase to be cut out and thrown away marina never cared what kind of wood was burning in her fireplace. this is not a word that does not correspond to the truth, does not correspond. i want to say. you have your huge immense love for marina and everything else you communicate. i do communicate. specialists , for example, once a very good

artist, very good and very famous , said an erroneous thing to the whole country, and then everyone began to repeat it. so there is such a poem on december 12th. uh, 1923, written by marina just after efron said everything. i don't love you either. i don't need you either. go there, live. and i myself voloshin with myself, while writing an offended hot letter, marina writes. poems you me, who loved the falsehood of truth and the truth of lies. you loved me nowhere further abroad. you loved me longer than time eyelashes wave. you don't love me anymore in five true words. and this famous artist

said it was written by radzevich. it is written to the front of any major specialist. eh, it will tell you not to us. 2 weeks have passed in this dismantling, and she understood and decided that both fron and alya without her will simply die about the children. i would very much like to say, because there are also mud. so, uh, there is no place to be. i sometimes ask a question in the hall. raise a hand. whose is the person who knows what hunger is for not a single hand of larisa in the hall. no, people don't know what hunger is. i want to tell you a terrible substance, i know what it was, what it is not to eat for 5 days for seven and dream of a piece of bread, what is it like

not to have a roof over your head? i know it, you see, they don't know, she didn't commit and who committed even more heinous acts, more terrible, but they are not marina tsvetaeva and after 40. so, the case was a very simple twig. look, but while her children were in this orphanage. she did not lie down on the bed and did not become. sorry to peel off the wallpaper there, you know, she didn’t go crazy, she had a relationship. she continued to live. let's now remember how it all happened. come on, she also had to feed the children, it was extremely difficult to feed. she didn’t go very often and what if the children bring a piece of bread, she’s all about my love and my soul, so someone told her that there is such a kuntsevo shelter. and what do they feed the children? well, really, why not

believe in watching it? didn't go, why didn't you go? but who took them there, and she took the children irina and alya abu and both girls there. and suddenly at one moment. uh, the news came, i don’t know how there weren’t any phones that i got sick. moreover, alya got sick, alya had a terrible temperature of 40 and even a little higher, and they couldn’t diagnose her, and she died, and marina ran and took ali home. and she nursed her. she did not leave her, and at this very moment, when all this was happening, she was fighting for her life. irina died in the orphanage there, and no one told her, and they buried her there. she found out everything, then i can

continue we are talking. poems two hands lowered on the infant's head were given to me, one for each two heads, but with both clamped furiously, as best as it could , the elder of darkness, snatching out the younger did not save, two hands to caress the gentle heads of the magnificent two hands, and here is one of them for the night turned out to be superfluous light on the neck of a thin dandelion, damn it. but i still don't understand at all. it's like, my child is in the ground, and i don't want to eat, drink and live, but cross my arms

quietly, float my eyes across the empty sky and for freedom. i'm not nasty. oh my god, i didn't move. i do not want to breathe hands. i don’t allow anyone to talk about this situation and about marina badly. who is speaking? who does not know what it was. and she left soon after. we irina did not become at the beginning of the twentieth year, the twenty-second she left. oh, marina left to sergei yakovlevich. eh, where did the masaryk call to the czech republic? but amazingly, she

writes to hurt another. no, a thousand times better to endure the most i'm not the winners. i myself am under court, my court is stricter than yours, i don’t like myself, i don’t sit. so that people do not say a phrase to the marin, they will always say a bad one. this is also true, when the first wife, but exactly written too early, brother too young. the main difference between his sociability, the public is my wolf solitude. he can’t live without a newspaper, and i’m in the house where the main newspaper can not live. right here, when this one was leaving with the undressing family. yes, it's boring, yes, the heart does not beat, but i was given a terrible gift of conscience - disrespect for someone else's suffering. she said who is your neighbor. the law of god is the one

who is most in you. e needs, maybe writes. she was a fool, they would have been happy without me, but who would have convinced me then. i was sure they were sure that without me they would die. and now i'm a burden to them. god's punishment they all want to act to build a life. they want more than what i can give gave away and left no one needed. i understand it well, i am like that. excuse me , but i understand why you are why she is the universe for herself, she is the universe yes, and for some reason her lawyer, of course, thank you. thank you. thank you for calling. i'm always happy to talk about marina and about how important it is to refute what you said today, it's so important. this is a podcast of letters, and my guest was great

svetlana kryuchkova heart of the lord