in the organization, he installed windows as an installer. here. well, when we met, he was working in a factory, he had nothing. he lost money playing slot machines. here it was already a thunderer. yes, he was a groman, he drank. uh, quite a lot, as he explained to me, that he was free, he really wanted love , that his marriage collapsed due to the fact that his wife offended him very much, and he is such a family man, he wants love, he wants children and that's it. he has the rest. there is a child hmm from the first marriage. that is, he told you that he is divorced. yes, he said that they have a spouse, and it was not true. well, at that moment. i thought it was. yes, he wrote his life and situation in such a way that he aspires. uh, uh, to success in the family, to love, that he dreamed about it for a long time and he had such an unsuccessful marriage. and when we met with him, he said that he was free. that he and his wife have not had a relationship for a long time,

that she is a very walking woman. she endlessly betrayed him, deceived him at night, went for a walk, and he brought up the poor unfortunate man there. child. and so it happened and that now the spouse is already living with another person, that she has a relationship, when you never said that you should run right away about those men who start you, especially in the very first days to pour dirt on their ex-women . well, you know, i want to tell you so much that a woman can be deceived only when she herself wants to be deceived, upstairs. yes, i tell everyone, yes, run right away at this very moment. i do not know what khors thinks about this from the point of view of high psychology. i i'm telling you from life experience once i think it's worth checking. and until you check it, you should not believe, yeah, that's all. so you are this gamer, drinker, whom you offended . according to him, the ex-wife warms up and takes with you to moscow. well, i don’t even take him, but he is

very successful. yes, to move in with me. let's still talk about terminology or he goes himself. so, when a man goes, he himself knows where he is going, how he will be, well, yes, provide for you and all that, when a woman takes him, she takes him to her under the wing, and in your apartment at your own expense. that's how i took him under your wing, but he showed the initiative very persistently. at that moment, i probably also wanted unearthly love there, about which my ex-husband spoke very beautifully. that's how old you were then i was 26 yes to him and he was 32 yeah. that's why, that is, the clock is ticking yes, hearts. well, to be honest, no, i really don't really care how it was the main reason why this happened. what's just a short backstory in love? yes

this, and before him i had a rather interesting life, such a stormy life. i have had business there several times. i built it and lost it. i had a lot of friends of acquaintances, these friends, well, a little above the level, they are a little much above the level, my ex-husband. and such an interesting life. uh, surrounded, there are the stars of politicians. uh, i don’t know, there are successful people at some point, i can’t say that she’s tired, but she also has her drawbacks, so let’s say the problem is that we are all an environment that at that moment is so happened. e, where i lived with my mother in ramenskoye , because just at that stage i lost a little, as if i closed my business and i had some kind of transshipment point. a pause in my life, that's all, the environment that was there, they are all from ukraine, as it were, and they are a little, well, not a little, but they fully correspond to his level. and here is

the pressure from these people who said there, look, what a man. that's why you need all these adventures there . why do you need these men there on a different level, that is, they were not his friends, not our friends got sick, but they immediately began to promote him, so to speak, as a permanent partner and husband, they had long been pressuring me and dripping with the fact that you need to be an ordinary man, who is a family man, who is there, can you start from scratch with you, well , i didn’t mind starting with him from scratch, because i’m not a stupid person either. i saw what i was going for another moment, that i believed in his feelings and believed in his lineage. here he seemed to me, and the gods, you see, here i am when i looked at him. he said such things. this accepted correctly. yes, the problem is, here is his relationship to life, let's say to the family to fidelity and for me it was very important. that's important, right?

ah, to verify people, you can verify in two ways, it means to check what they are yes, the first, because they say, and the second, because they do, of course. and he did out, that he obviously came to your house and lived at your expense. yes, this is what he did. but how is he in general, that is, well, he didn’t go to work or says that, yes. they didn't pay here. here they threw me or i something else all very rapidly developed. that is, we had a very short time before he moved e to me here, because i left immediately after 2 weeks and these two weeks he came to our house to my grandmother there at my grandmother's house. yes, i was also born in ukraine in the same city. i came to my grandmother, to visit, and he came to my grandmother. he tried, as if he were helping

our family there, buying some pills, some food. he is a hunter, he brought a duck there, uh, from hunting. why is it called? god tell me yes, there is such a moment that then for some reason already after 6 years, i was asked such a question, and what then is he god, but i will retreat a little after only 4 years. his mother called me when he had already betrayed me. uh, cheated, and i found out he was living a double life. completely with another girl there already in our apartment in my apartment. where were you when he lived this time ? it came to me and this problem came. just was getting sharper. and when he came here, and he acted very competently, knowing that we are completely different levels, not only there

financially. well, intellectually there. e. i erudite him; i have more interests in talents and, as it were, at first it annoyed him. and secondly, as i already understand now, that he was simply afraid if he would let me out among the people, yes, in the circle of my friends of acquaintances there, who appreciate this, and they are the same as me with all the interests, uh, he just crushed me, as if, that is, he began to slowly, quietly deprive me these are my talent interests there. eh, there are hobbies. and how does it happen? well, he said, well, what are you doing all sorts of nonsense. look at these hobbies of yours. but it's just kindergarten. don't go there, yes, well, it's not even the way they go, of course, about communicating with other people. well, it's understandable. he is at home. i work a lot. it is not right. if you go out there somewhere. i say come with me. i'm tired.

here you will be a bad wife. if you go somewhere without me, he worked all the same this moment, it worked. here after. uh, 4 years later, how did we not finish it. yes, 4 years later. the way we lived and i found out about another girl, his mother called, who loved and respected me so madly, and was for our relationship. she called me and accused me of what happened. i took him away from the first family. i say, wait, i say to me now this is news after 4 years that he, it turns out, was a family. she says, yes, they had a full-fledged family, they lived and loved each other. well, how is everything with problems? here you will make some kind of child there. now, from what you said yourself, what you need to give. yes, that is, i understand correctly that it was not just one episode, but he was generally in stable a and systematically lived a double life. he had other relationships parallel to yours.

you know, that's why everyone stayed there , because he so, uh, how skillfully played this role of such semin that he seemed to be completely owned by me, and in fact everything about him years later. i found out, that he always had a second phone number, that he met other girls there , moreover, he brought them. yes, you got into my apartment. in power. this is, in my opinion, not the first time. i on our transmission this word happened psychopath. this is a podcast with a psyche. my name is natalya loseva. i am a journalist and my co-host is a clinical psychologist. mikhail horse and our heroine svetlana with whose loneliness? today we are fighting, you slipped several times that he somehow took your apartment your business. he was literally alphonson, or did he earn, but not enough, or did he spend your money on someone. and i can't say that he is

alphonse alphonse, probably, a person who really does not work. no, he worked, and he worked a lot. he worked. there from 5:00 in the morning until 12:00 at night there. well, i think that he brought money, but i never saw his money, you never existed. watch how svetlana speaks, he worked from 5:00 in the morning until 5:00 at night there bubu, then you say, and it turns out that he had a second life as a woman, there phones and so on. he told you that he works. check it out for the future. now, yes, that is, you told us 3 minutes ago that you discovered that he had other women all the way, had a second life, another phone, and immediately tell us with absolute conviction that he worked until 5:00 in the morning. at what time did he, uh, do this, yes , he mastered other women and other things. well, when he lied to you that he was already working. after a while , of course, yes, there were moments when at

the moment you believed him, you thought that he really works, since he worked in surrounded by my family friends, uh, who , probably, could not give there too, well , i don’t know massively, i don’t know, listen, how many have abandoned you, then relatives and friends, they think. well, what am i going to get out of here, well , somewhere he took time off from work and left. well , you never know what business he has. and now i’ll go with the wind, i’ll tell you, their marriage will fall apart, and we have devoted so much effort so that they are finally there, so that the light and from there to here on earth near the earth. yes, you understand less, but but did not bring you money. you say that you don't saw the money, but he told you before, right? that's it, that's all for me, that he lives, that he will be all this the question was asked, where is the money, we swore a lot. you fought because of it. so he told you well there is no money. you talk, you listen to this work from morning to night. why don't you get paid? no why they pay.

and where did you constantly have some kind of need, yes, to spend, but no matter how it was for me, but at the same time, for example, well, for your own interests, for example, we have been there for four years, you know, a boat with a motor, right? in the end, after all this whole story, it turned out that he bought the land, oh, which i did not know, you know, good interest. he rolled the car out of the passenger compartment suddenly, out of nowhere money appeared from him, therefore he saved them. maybe somehow it took care of you? well, yes, in bed you had a quality one. he, uh, yes sex. we had a wonderful everything in this regard, but again, wonderful. he was thanks to me, because at the moment when we met and it is possible that sex was the reason that he was so seized on me, and, as it were, during these many years, when we were already there , uh, cursing, it was hard for him, as it were. sex

was not the reason sex was the cherry, the reason was that you lived in moscow and the apartment. yes, and he, as he himself told you, well, with a mother with an apartment, strive for success. uh-huh and at the same time, he can eat, apparently, there is a woman to use public places, but not give them money for this, but put the money in a box there or spend it on someone. so it turns out, yes, the way of a man, but these so-called friends of yours, but to the circle that your husband was brought out. initially, they were always on his side, or someone there said. listen, everything is fine there, in general, you know, it seems to me that this became a picture for them too. firstly, i made a picture, and secondly, it became decisive just the same, we say that a person is holistic. yes, you don’t need to look for a soul mate before him, i also lived even when

i lived with him. um, it's like i 'm philosophizing there. everything is beautiful, i say. i say everything right, but integrity and everything the rest and i live there in much the same way after him, but for some reason i was very strongly influenced not even by him, but by my environment. since these people are there with me there are the very diapers, and we were friends with the nursery, yes, and they grew up, as if i grew up in their environment there for 30 years. we know each other. what was their influence? hmm three questions, what was his influence on them? come on, right there, right now, here is the story with these pills for grandma. here it is clearly, probably repeated with each of our others with the move, in my opinion, not the right word it is necessary to change, yes, the word, they all say that this is the best sympathetic friend. damn yes, he is the most perfect man. here is one of them. kinet,

yes, they themselves are now aware of it, but they know there are such people when she asked the question. why did they decide to stay with him, especially in such a difficult situation, when he took this apartment from me, and he took it completely illegally. also in the case , the documents also turned out to be altered by him. this is a contract of sale. let's go back, so that's betrayal itself. and what happened, then they could evaluate the order. yes , how could we evaluate the reaction of your friends. well, or doubt, for example, your picture of the world, what happened? what was the betrayal? well, let's start with the fact that we have been here throughout our lives the first thing that he suppressed me very much by what he said, he did not let me out, anywhere at all. that is, all my talents are interesting to everyone. he skillfully extinguished, as if i were there, for example, here's an example. yes, i'm good at drawing. uh, he draws very well, that is, people there suggested

me there to participate in the exhibition. he won't let you. no, he allowed it, but you know it, so i, for example, will paint a picture that people want to buy. yes, even i put it on the balcony, i think, well, now he will come from work, he will come in, as he sees there he will praise me. well, i went in and saw a smoke, and in general, i didn’t say a word, and the man didn’t say a word. well, as if i, as a woman, immediately think, i am unworthy. i drew badly. i'm there and that's the same in karaoke. for example, i sing beautifully, we come to karaoke, the presenters come to us. he says a none of us sings. for example, yes, and you feel no, then i sing badly, then i don’t do it that way. well, then it can openly say, listen to how the girl sings beautifully there is some other one. he conquered you on the first. he pulled it all up and then lowered it. yes, like a spider, it means that it has entangled the cobwebs of this buzzing fly and let's dip you into a cruel reality, and friends did not see this, but for friends. he, apparently, was such a loving husband, so

caring, attentive, admiring his little level. yeah, it doesn't look like much distant yes, and they were more important to them than the picture than the essence of their common interest. you know what happened they have common interests. they are just like him, so we spent all the holidays in the kitchen. everything, that's for all our years lived there, maximum. we were celebrating, there are all birthdays, all holidays. naturally. i am human. for example, i like to go to the theatre. go to the cinema fly abroad there go to a restaurant. can you imagine it got to the point that he constantly says, there is no money, i say, i have them, let's go. i'm just saying 500 rubles. unfortunate we will spend, there pizza, we will eat, near the house or we will drink coffee. no, there is no time, no money. here you are bad. you do not understand. this is, uh, the main psychological trauma, which is now just starting to recover a little, but does not let me go. e our divorce. and our scandals all happened

due to the fact that, besides, besides, we have booze, there is nothing in the kitchen, nothing in life, and at some point i freaked out and began to travel myself. there i flew to rome there to france another somewhere else. yes, but he is that's it, i was nothing. so i flew away , you are so he is at this time for now. for example, i'm in france, yes, at the same time, i say, here's the money, i bought you a ticket. fly with me, i 'll pay for everything. i paid back the hotel paid for germany on valentine's day. i have such a holiday there, and you understand, he comes and does everything, perhaps, so as not to satisfy. this is mine, so that i can sit at home, so that here i am in the kitchen with him tinkering somewhere. wait let's stop michael why did he do that? the answer is very simple psychopath. well, that is, what gave him pleasure, what power? and just power, of course, he is. well, how to use this task to survive to throw away, then look out of the corner of your eye. if suddenly there is something there

to use again, so for a long time they didn’t leave it, didn’t leave it, because i’m still traveling. yes, he is, so with these friends in front of us they are just telling what she is? yes, she left me. he tells it in a completely different way. i'm even already in the car in the dash cam when he comes tells people. she hits me. she got me there. wait. did you find out? it's from the dvr and the dvr footage. no, i just tried. and friends we have one conflict happened in the car. eh, when is he there? well, he insulted me with foul language there . yes, there it even yelled at you, yes, and i'm still friends when they say, why are you hitting sveta? why are you insulting him? you sent him. you called him there, so you are so slender, fragile, which means a girl with a figure of a ballerina. did you kill him well? yes and you show in the form of this recording of the dvr. they don't believe? i say, that's not the way he says,

no. they no, well, they believe, as it were, but still , for some reason, the conclusion remains. they have good mistakes. maybe only a spiritual strong man. you know about friends. here, let's talk about such an experiment psychological. and this is me in my group. i do this sometimes. here i put a few people in a circle. plump like that, and then i ask one person to stand with their feet on a chair. uh-huh rise up. and you ask those around you what you are do you feel now? yeah, and what you want to do, then the first option is to pull it down, yes, then they stop, as it were, well, discomfort sensations. uh-huh, the second this popularity is the answer. it is to move as far as possible so that it does not hang so much, and the very last is the third most popular, 5% of the answers. this is what help to rise to become next to him. this is impossible. it's better

to look for people who will also want to stand on a high chair again. the second is better to surround yourself with people who are already on the chair next to you and as it turns out those people are happy they say, come on, here's a ticket to germany, here's something for you, that's all for you, right? yeah, if you try to live next to such people, at least there will be more in life, but still the problem is that i understood it all once again appeared in your life, and he appeared as a maniac because she saw him. she was fascinated by them. she dragged him about you. that 's the main thing, of course. and another thing is that my ex-husband came to these friends, and for some reason told them that a sveta considers you rogue. she considers you

unworthy of yourself no matter how many times i tried to explain that guys. i'm always kind of helping, on the contrary, i'm striving there , i 'm calling you somewhere. they did not go, the second you, strive, you were devalued the third time you again. and you continue to pull them off , it's already better to live alone. you were technically a man's wife with friends. e, with such a husband, who, for the environment , represented, in general, an almost ideal match. you might be proud. you were never happy with him, what's unhappy in the loneliness that you are living now . you know, it seems to me that

i accidentally found a note at home to another girl there. here, yes there with congratulations, be happy teddy bear. so, as if he began to tell me again, there weren’t even any suspicions. yes, well, in general, i believed to such an extent, in any case, in his loyalty and, again, the environment. here he is the only man of the light who will never betray you, so everyone changes. but he will never change. he's just up to it, but it's

not capable that he loves you so much. he he understands you, he goes to everyone and look at me, he came, he sat crying with us and here we are the last time we had a fight before his already obvious betrayal. uh, because once again we decided to try again and i say, well, let's fly and rest. here the new year has flown, the only holiday for all there for 5 years, we will normally celebrate, as it were, money again. no. i say, i give the money flew, he did everything possible so that we did not fly away and when after the new year i found out. about this girl that caused me the most, probably, serious in life psychological trauma. it turned out that in one month he spent more money on this woman than they even planned to fly away, for example, yes on this vacation, that is, he told me that there was no way to fly away. here, and i spent 15 to 20,000 a day on it and all those things, all those places, all those lists that i wrote to him.

i want to go there to this museum, to this theater , to this restaurant, that’s all you know, i showed him there for 5 years, i told her in moscow. he absolutely took her to all these places. that is she is some kind of girl from the province. it is clear that she is completely different there and he arrived in my car. that is , he told her that he says he bought an apartment from him, although he bought it. i like he showed up. naturally, he came with an expensive purse, which i gave as a gift, it is clear that the girl was so fascinated there. he was there on the first day without even seeing her. they talked on the phone. he was already there and gave her a huge bouquet of roses. although we started our relationship. i just begged them for these flowers like that, because on march 8 without flowers there i i say, well, you're coming home from work, you can not spend money until you teach him. yes? here it is. so no, they even taught me, and the most interesting thing i tried to explain to him is that this is a cat, you understand? here if we fly, this is for the two of us. it's not like

you're doing me a favor by saying. you will also be lying on the beach there to get high, yes, when you flew away you were charged with emotions there. you 've seen the world, you've seen a different life there, everything you come to has more uh-huh disappointment. this is a consequence of what expectations charm. yes, disappointment comes after charm. and charm. this is from the word spell. now you know, they loaded you there. and the question is, what now? when to live further? i understand what her resentment is, this resentment is much stronger than if we are just there and only physically changed. she put so much into him, and he's just the scoundrel he took. this is not material. yes, this spiritual spirituality took her into another girl. it's all invested. here is a betrayal of the capital letter. and what friends for sure. this is all

equally understood, you told them you didn’t appreciate you don’t need such friends. you are not alone. unfortunately, because you continue to be in dialogue. you understand with these friends and with him, and until you drive them out with a filthy broom in your life. you will not come to that saving loneliness that you now need as a gateway. this is even a girl. yes, i would understand, if he really fell in love there, they started a relationship there. well, he also used it, that is, he used it when i found out about him and about her now. the main thing is to try for yourself. that's what i don't want more about him. i want about myself. yes, you are part of uh, this time you lost. unfortunately, but you have acquired something and acquired tremendous experience. you have purchased this vaccine. yes, from such people there are enough of them, well , a little bit a lot, but they are, they go. here in life they are looking for all the victims sticking, that

they can take away, go further, and once you succumb to this, then you are at risk. you can repeat it to him. this is not the first time. i had a situation where i am also two before that, the man took the mercedes, well , it was there voluntarily. and here in this way once again svetlana yes, the first and important do not believe you completely. check, and here's what you check, you can't leave it under a question mark. this does not mean not to enter into a relationship more, but check there was such a stage when you say, when you realized that you were betrayed. they are no longer the same people who should be in life, and when when i realized this, and these people disappeared from my life, including my ex-spouse, and i it actually got a lot easier. i started living in the first place, uh, since he took the apartment and took everything. i was deeply in debt because i had to live somewhere. i was still there, uh, i took a loan there and bought another apartment there. yes, i took out a mortgage. i

needed to start somewhere. i needed to build a business. so, i opened a production for this production, i also needed money. well, now the business, thank god, is developing, but for now, investments are still needed. and i was so high, because this time i i realized that i can dedicate it to myself and really. i went there, read it , went to the hall. i don't know how to draw. this was the beginning, that is, all that was interesting to me was some kind of good stage, but then it got rid of the bad, but the good was not added. and yes it is. yeah, but there is no good or good, there is only what you want and in another way it is important to understand that life is undulating. well, it got worse. better. now you may again have a little swing back into these experiences, into this pain , into this resentment, sometimes it’s not good, it’s not bad. you living person. you may have some again, yes, the main thing is not the point at which you are the main trend the general you know

is quite calm about this, because i have been living this way all my life. i lose find. here from the bottom up from the top down. it's a magnet to such an extent. allow yourself to do this emotionally as well. i'm currently suing this apartment. yes, i really want you to find out. we are proud to sue, but the fact is that now these courts are also putting pressure on me psychologically, because he wins them. yes, but he wins them on the basis of forged documents. and this is injustice. e, despite the fact that, uh, well, here again, justice is just a judge, but he does not know the crime, yes, that the documents have been done. why is it your job to show it there? eh, you know it's useless, because at the first trial. i came alone. and again, for some reason, it so happened that he spoke so emotionally that i beat him, that i gave him 60,000 straight

to understand that svetlana is an enemy. your attempts to be there are honest open not work. you will always, when you are honest and seek justice , lose next to him, so your task is to prepare for interaction with the enemy today. you see, all these events that were from the past, which are taking place by courts, are very stressful events. with so many good things going on right now. i just don't have anyone to share it with. well, due to the fact that those people left, no new ones were added, and i don’t even have anyone to call there to say what is so good about, what happens is he succeeds in business. i can't now. why is it necessary to talk about this? why do you need to have someone say? wow, what a smart girl you are, and

well done, a person needs a person. it's not just that, i agree. wait, well, just don't look there, don't you see? before my husband, i had such a life that i did not have time to take pipes there, that is, only people. stop you had it yes means they wait never mind. it means you can do it, really. i want to share the joy of life some positive things. but they will somehow come new people will talk about what a pancake, what a cool you are. here come on and then for some reason they just disappear. give yourself time to build new relationships in your life destroyed including yourself well, stupidly it happens. eh, nothing terrible from any devastation, you can fly into a clear juice with a fenist, but yes, it’s important, first of all, stop scolding yourself for it. uh-huh second, directly

send them all. as natalya quite rightly said, yes, clean out with a broom from your head. these are all the people, thirdly, to give to other people. yes, well, somehow cling to yourself or cling to yourself for them to arrange a relationship. and for this, time is time friends. this is a podcast of the psyche, where i am a journalist, natalya loseva and clinical psychologist , candidate of psychological sciences mikhail khors , analyzed the rather painful story of our wonderful heroine, svetlana, and we are with great hope. we look to the future of svetlana, we hope that everything will work out for her. this is an easy money podcast, and i am its host mikhail khanov and today we have a long-awaited guest alexei borisovich

bobotkin, deputy chairman of the central bank of the russian federation. hello alex, hello. let's start with dreams. why do we need central banks in a market economy? a market economy needs it. well, let's say in uh regular maintenance in the proper oversight of the audit. here is the central bank, it is a regulator for the financial sector of the economy in order to use it reliably to use ordinary people or the authorities in order to use it conveniently, so that it is possible to use the financial sphere. uh, it's convenient for society, of course it's worth it. er, is to probably the easiest way to answer this question. this is how i answer it when the kids ask me if dad is doing something. uh, i say that i and my colleagues in the central bank. uh, our main function is to ensure that money remains money, so that the money

that you and i use on a daily basis in a in our lives, and they retain their value, so that the money that is stored in the bank is for you were available so that the banks were stable and, uh, so that at the moment when you , uh, want to pay for something with this money, the payment system also works without delay. well, let's slowly understand this. i'm just by virtue of my career i'm practical. e. well, probably, for 25 years, companies have been working on the other side of the barricades, in fact, which the ceba regulates, and the question with this is this, and how much are the powers of the central bank of its invariable function, how much they are unchanged, they develop, what has changed over the past, well, let's say, 10 years the last 10 years, of course, but very