wrote a contract, and he is less dependent on the coach than there. the person who signed the contract with him and so on depending now has become more. i used to be a coach more than a host. in my opinion, this is now in england if the coach has this position, if he is the owner in all this sports block, the owner in this sports block agrees, i agree, but again this is a top team. they live like that, that a person really decides absolutely there, therefore they are top prices, how the level of the russian premier league has changed now with what it was a couple of years ago.

then next to them, the youth that exists grew faster. but since things are not like this, it means that we need to find a way out of this, probably, we need to pay attention to the periphery, probably, we need to pay attention to the salary of peripheral coaches. not like in moscow, here are the peripheries. basically, all the stars come from the periphery, they are more efficient. probably, there are many points that work should pay attention to during this period. which young coaches are most for you now i wonder who, in your opinion creatively suited to your profession. well

, because of foreigners, i like orenburg the most, honestly. i really like it. and not possessing all the same such players. tournament table interesting moves, there are tactical moves , he seems to me a good psychologist. of ours but we have a lot of worthy ones, for example, well, for example, a collection of kazakhstan adev work well. works well abroad. well at the russian championship, the russian team is working from

krasnodar in azerbaijan . maybe you are impressed this season with a team that lokomotiv passed in the cup and dynamo passed and now spartak and kaleshin are waiting for a young coach. oh, he works well for him. at least there is some zest, then he is very like that.

uh, you know, how the caustic thoughtful himself played football. okay, the whole family in football he's promising training. yes, we'll be watching. at least. now he advances. yes? well of course, well, such a cup success. eh, this is a big-big deal. his father , i played with him perfectly, the football player was the most beautiful. well, he's in football, you know, like he has football blood. each round arrives with errors and then these errors are recognized, as most recently in the game spartak what is happening with the judges in our country? i understand that this is a question. i'll tell you honestly.

i do not understand anything. uh, in appointing a penalty, i immediately say the main mistakes. you, as usual, emphasize those inside the penalty area, i don’t understand anything. why they give a penalty i used to understand if a player obviously enters a dangerous position and a rude reception is against him. that penalty is now such situations they seek out the cook that the ball generally in the other side there is a small collision, and they give one symmetry. i don’t understand one thing, they have to make the judges look at the world cup, which was there, what was it, wait. yes,

wait, we are now. they go to see how many 2-3 minutes go by. our players how many times fall lying around and waiting for an ambulance? how many times per match do you take approximately. estimate the statistics, interesting statistics, and then the doctor will come up and anoint something and go and play. here i touched on the intensity it helps intensity. yes, of course, no, of course, no

there are two or three minutes, there and these minutes. pause again the tempo decreases pause again the tempo players are already wallowing in each collision, probably, the referee should warn the first time the second time, maybe give a yellow card. or you can remove the provocation there by injury, then we will increase the intensity and we will walk less. uh, more responsible people should be prepared for this clara, which if we also understood that there is 100%, then 100%. what advice do they have all the time refer to the recommendations of fifa but proceed from their situation. let's eat a penalty so

that everyone can see that it was not, it was not, it means it's not necessary. put two days ago opened again tournaments. 500 teams participating in it opened this tournament further. there was a tournament in mordovia, but they did not do it in my name. i also need to be there to greet the guys as a finalist , there are gifts and so on there, by the way, mordovia in saransk has amazing conditions in order to

hold tournaments in winter . the stadium is there with stands, even the beautiful field is well organized. here is the film we were filming , do you remember the film, we went in the evening, cameroonian, we went on a course series good time you didn’t like the series that we came to the priest. see how football loves us our idea was to show football on the periphery, how it is, whether it develops or not. it seems to me that we succeeded and this father built it. from his farm

orphanage in this orphanage guys. guys who have some flaws and so on, but he inoculates them. he himself was. ovchinnikov's gloves therefore, these moments are much, much further. eh, now there is. e, i help the guys who won the grants

organize their own tournament, which is already being held, probably for the third, fourth or fifth year. uh, all the small ones from there small areas from small villages are orphanages that also play football and the interior, so no one wants to lead. that is, you are ready to find out. well why are there good good situations to be? if you're wondering why not they carry, of course, in general now there is a lot of all psychology, a lot of psychology. here are

the good things he said, e, just in a personal he says, here are the russian players. they greatly underestimate their own qualities, they worry all the time. but it probably is. he probably says the right thing, probably, the coach does not inspire in childhood. e. in terms of confidence for young kids something is the best is the best for today. you can do anything. you can become a world champion. you can become, it seems to me, this is ours just russian players are missing. our podcast is called football not hockey, we compare two sports that are very popular in our country, and well, your time and mine also played

football in the summer or then hockey. now the most popular football is combed from the other side. if we look at it, but hockey has its advantages - they let you in from the street from wherever you want to the stands, so it's full. i'm sick now. now i am rooting for ak bars ticketin my neighbor is beautiful, right? why compare two sports, why is football not hockey? which football benefits? no benefits e and football is a big game and hockey is a big game many combinations many interactions a lot of salary. they are somewhat similar, these are two sports. they are probably related. and the most

popular agrees absolutely, so it is, it also distracts us and helps us in life. thank you very much for your time. thank you this podcast is psychic. my name is natalya, a journalist , my co-host, phd in psychology , clinical psychologist mikhail khors hello dear friends, our today's heroine. karina hello karina hello , a person who wants to be friends, but can not be friends, it seems that people do not want to communicate with me. and how do you understand that people do not want to communicate with you? well listen. here you are sitting such a pretty girl smiling, but not long yes , she behaves adequately, we want to communicate with you

the desire to communicate with a person. this picture is more important than the soul. and what's inside. i don't know why you know, it's some kind of manic, probably the idea in my head constantly talking. and it might be okay for example, and at some point something clicks, and i mentally feel the reflection that the person does not want, that is , the person does not tell you that you do not want to communicate. he can’t ignore you, you feel that way, but basically these are my feelings , of course, then all this goes into reality that we stop communicating, either i push myself away from the person of my life, or mine diverge for some reason, but all this still goes into the fact that we stop communicating entirely completely , it has always been like this right from childhood or something happened in your life. and suddenly you realized that relationships with people have ceased to be built. it wasn't always like that. and for me , such a trigger, uh, is the situation. and, when

i was 18 years old, in general, analyzing some kind of past. i understand that in school. well, i wasn’t a mistake, i was a sociable person, but somehow everything was forgotten long ago. this situation applies to any communication, or only friendly, or here, there is. uh, communication with the opposite sex is about any communication. i still have yes, because it’s hard in any communication, not only in communication, with the same gender that i have, and with parents like me, i have an excellent relationship. i understand that you were brought up, mostly by your mother. yes, he just died quite glad, and your mother is your friend, yes , the best, and your mother has a friend. she has familiar friends. uh, she's on the phone every day with these people, but i don't know her relationship, whether she considers them a friend for her or not. do you have any

idea of ​​what friendship should be like? i'd like to hmm, probably reciprocate friendship conditionally, let's say i'm reaching for to a person. i want to communicate with him, but i do not see this in response. how are you stretching? here, what are you doing? i can write, for example, just to find out how things are going. i can call a person to go somewhere to drink tea. well, that's it, this is one-sided, firstly, and secondly , it naturally bothers me too, when , for example, you call a person to go somewhere several times, he refuses or agrees, but you see that this is exclusively hmm well, okay , let it be. it ’s just that, too, you don’t want to communicate further with this person, yes, but the point is to impose. a let's say, when you went with a person, and in a cafe to drink tea or coffee, what are you talking about, basically, who do i go with, if this is a colleague tom, of course, we are talking about work. and if this person is not because of my field of activity, then i don’t even know some

neutral topics, and you ask there, well, i don’t know about the family, about hobbies. it's about personal life. that is, you show some interest in this person. here it is necessary to post that i am not very interested in someone else's life. it's hard for me to climb. to me the truth is hard to ask, but to climb some conversations, especially in person. if some families tell me a lot themselves, for some reason on their own. yes, i know, but i 'm telling you. yes, they tell me, but i don’t ask mikhail, look, there is karina who wants to be friends, and she says so. at the same time, she says that she is not interested, in general. uh, the personal lives of the people she wants to be friends with. there is a complexity uninteresting, and i'm afraid, or it's hard for me, as if they said, yes they ask. that is, here, i would work separately with this hard. actually answering the question. why is

it hard? yes? and after working through these reasons, and then, uh, she talked about some behavioral changes, paradoxically, yes , first karina gives out her usual formula, people do not want to communicate with me, and then she says that there is quite a lot of professional personal communication with her mother . and even there are friends, but, but it's just that this communication is not the same, and the depths of which you want to be superficial. yes, but basically it is the college, it is extremely superficial. but this, uh, still contradicts that people don't want to talk to you. i would not say, but to state the fact that such people want to communicate with you, but from your point of view. at work, for example, in the field of work, it is necessary and people are forced to want to communicate with you, but on business matters. well,

hypothetically so in general. we certainly share some. i don't know gossip or something else, it's all during working hours, going out of work, it all ends, people want to communicate with you. it's convenient and comfortable there, right? why because it's not friendship it just a normal working relationship. let us you. maybe, after all, we will try to hear karina how does she see friendship. yes, i want some kind of karenin. here's an example now . you are an illustrator. what are you doing? i work as illustrators for disney, and i also paint walls with nfc in general. imagine you e. you have entered the market. here are those services. wow, you're doing something. and people say i like it. that's what you don't like, and at some point you say you must like everything i draw. here i am

wall you have to love it completely 100%, otherwise i won't draw for you anymore. i can do that, by the way it's in my nature. and this is visible. this is such a terrible system i am, in fact, in terms of. ah, my own work. it seems to me to the last that she is ugly, and i recently painted a portrait for my girlfriend to order. i drew it for two months, probably, and of course, asking some friends there. how did they tell me that someone said that it was cool, someone said that she was not like, and i threw it off i was glad, but i still look at this portrait and want to change it, because for e your ex-colleague you said girlfriend. yes , because we have worked together for many years. we communicated very closely. now we don’t communicate anymore, because we are at another job, that is, our calls are only

once every few months, if i am. that is , you see again, we don’t communicate, but we communicate once every few months. yes, i considered it for myself. i considered her a friend. i don't know what this person has to do with me. tell me, does this friend have pets? animals. yes, young man, not now, do you know who her parents are? yes? that is, you were somehow included after all in her life. yes , except for a lot of time spent together at work. why, look, they communicated, yes, that is, they would go far beyond the boundaries of the workers by the fact that when they stopped working together, it turns out that everything that was not connected with work, yes, that is, that variable which hasn't disappeared. she disappeared. uh, from their lives, because in recent years people need more and more more personal space. and there is no horror in this, because more and more people spend eight hours at work, but at least. and who wants

to succeed because people get tired of communicating people get tired of being open because they are in social networks. here they are available messengers are constantly beeping people are tired of all this society is changing society appreciates more and more. uh, privacy, where's the trouble here , it's just such a social trend, uh, two girlfriends with whom i considered friends with one we've been talking since we were 10, and they've been talking for probably eight years now. it seems to me somewhere plus or minus. yes, we do not communicate, we had a fight. to be honest, i don’t even remember why, most likely, she messed it up. i was offended, as it was mostly, and during this period of our non-communication. she got married , gave birth to a child and christened him , we were already at that conscious age when we agreed and it was such an extracurricular thing that i would be the godfather of the child.

she will be red my child so much, but we have private communication in six months, after after she baptized the child. she called me with an excuse to make amends. i asked her. why didn't you do it before? why did you marry in silence? why did you uh give birth in silence? why are you with me with a person who, as you say, was the closest to you, did not share this . if you want this question, she answered me in general. and how she kissed, then i really want to hear how she will say. she said that i was afraid that you, and you will reject me, we will not make peace. uh-huh yes, and this answer did not suit you, of course, that is, she told you about that she is a living person who has fears, to whom it may be, it hurts, which she can worry about. why didn't you like this answer? i accepted it. this is her answer. i know it's great that she was honest with me, but it was strange for me to say that she didn't want to be with me. and

when her husband started beating her, she called me as soon as i had this strange for you. this is just ordinary human behavior , much easier than rejoicing with those who rejoice. you already know this for centuries, a proven maximum. it's just that i, uh, couldn't distrust her anymore. do not communicate with her. i was pushed away by this whole situation very strongly pushed away not by this situation you were pushed away by your pride your opinion that this situation is bad, that this person behaves incorrectly and should behave differently, this is communication. eh, it's close close deep. as you said, i couldn't trust her, missed the word completely, yes, and you don't need to completely trust adults mentally. they trust to some extent. see, that was the only person i trusted her wishes you a happy birthday, but you don’t , look here, what’s important erin, such

wording is categorical with me completely no one wants to communicate, and i didn’t trust anyone. she is the only person. here is this categorical. people are repelled from you, you know how a hungry person walks. so he has no money to buy food. lies on the ground 100 rubles. where you can buy a pie, he says 100 rubles. i won't take it. i want lunch at an expensive restaurant. until they put me 5,000 here. i won’t bend down, you understand, then it goes on for another 100 rub. another 100 rubles. another 100 rubles. i don't need 100 rubles. just give me 5,000. that's completely what i want, then you present yourself to me in such a way with friendship. you don’t take a message, you don’t take what is inside outwardly, maybe you are trying to somehow communicate behaviorally, but then again, people somehow also

read you non-verbally. and when you internally devalue the level of communication , the level of interest that exists between you and some human colleague, for example, yes, you , if you think that this is not enough, this is bad, that this should not be there should be more. yes, then people are so close to you and are they feel, apparently, burning. i really like to communicate with me, once again, she is somehow dismissive of the level of communication that i can now give. friendship is such a job. and contrary to many things, including social public opinion, there can be inequality. here is something else citizens of some kind, yes or approval friendship - this is about you. it's not about other people. if you want someone to be a friend, be a if you need to exchange some benefits from this friendship take what people can give and give what you consider

equivalent to what i represent now and to everything that i say, certain events have now led to. what a lot of times i have been betrayed, you can’t even imagine, and you can probably tell it hurts so much until now karina tell me this can be a traumatic situation. i have a few, probably two, uh, which still resonate in my heart this is the first situation, when i was 18 years old. uh, i really wanted to associate with one company. we have such a small stadium inside our house, and we all went out there for a walk. everything was fine. these evenings, we sat chatting and talking, but at some point, people began to hide from me. i could go outside, there was no one there, for example, winter. i go out into the street no one. no. i call the guys to find out where they are, because they went out every evening. that was 100%, and they told me. oh, we are at home. i don't

the second i have the same answer, and then, i'm busy. the third time you told me, yes, we actually all sat on the list here. well , there's just someone there. he just doesn't want to see you. he asked everyone to tell you, and this went on more than once , not a single time. there for some weeks or it hurts, i told people very much that they should not communicate with me, but in there were young people who were married to everyone, there were 2-3 girls and these girls. i thought we had a normal relationship. but first of all, too. mostly. i i wrote about whether they would go for a walk or not, and on their part it was quite rare, but i tried not to pay attention to it. this happened several times, when he repeatedly prevented him from stopping communication with them after the first time after the first time. i didn’t understand that in fact this was completely communication against me. they explained this to me, then karina why did such a situation arise that your company did not want to see? i don't know, i ask this man repeatedly, but he is

the only one he said that he me hates that i speak slowly, that i somehow communicate incorrectly, that is, in general, he found some superficial ones, and the phrase in order to describe to me, this was a young man, yes, then later, he went into the army and suddenly. the whole team is a company. she changed all over, and all the types wanted to communicate with me. and, that is, he is such an opinion leader who set everyone up, that is, he did not exist. he came and started the whole situation. everyone openly said that he was against it. what is the betrayal. i do not say that this is a betrayal. i say that this is a painful situation for me. and what were the situations when i also had a situation. the girl with whom i talked and in general, whom i considered myself a friend for myself, and she argued with my young man against me and here it was a very cool betrayal. i would rather not go into the full details of the situation. i met a very

rich man, and she madly wanted a man with money too, frankly. ah, i introduced her to his friend, who also had money, but with my boyfriend introduced us. just the same, my friend, he argued with my young man. they told my friend all this as i read it. she was aware of what these people were going to do to me. she took me to the place where they were. where they were going to do it and didn't tell me about it. she said after, but after it was very late, so betrayal. she, uh, swore she didn't hang out with those people. however, with my ex-boyfriend, she lit together. i know perfectly well, but she already has pictures with this man. what should i do? after that, you yourself said, this is the real betrayal , this is an absolutely vile, vile act. this

man, of course, is no friend. it ’s not even an enemy, it’s just some kind of abomination , yes. it also happens that there are a lot of people in life, everything, goodbye. she left your life. i also had a friend who, on my birthday , put me in front of a choice, either my mother or her friend, which was completely absurd and natural. i immediately sent it very strongly to such people who did situation e yes, then it was 21 years old. psychic, my name is natalya loseva, my co-host is a candidate of psychological sciences, a clinical psychologist, mikhail choir - our guests karina, who does not know how to be friends karina, but the person you are friends with, he must be some kind of well, i don’t know how to correspond to you, external full of water. there is no such thing, that is, there are no social barriers, some kind of social selection. no,

michael has a question for you. for me , after all, the concept of friendship. it still has some kind of such. well, not really, let's say. material and rational let's say. uh, shade and explanation, because it really happens. here, like. here are different people, this is a person who is cute, interesting - this is cute, interesting, but with this i want to share, communicate, be silent together in a cafe, go to the cinema, go, uh, share something like that, well, sad or joyful, but not with this. what it is? what makes people friends? that's at some level that is rationally difficult to explain. well, if we remove, on the one hand, mysticism, and on the other hand, something like that is simply not quite material rationality. there may even be some smells, for example, from childhood, there are pleasant or unpleasant. yes, one smells like this, with such notes there are perfumes from another in a different way, and that's it, but

the main number of problems, difficulties in relationships are not because of this, but because of our attitudes, because of ours here. your maximalism, which you present to yourself in your work. yes, as you draw, so you also present it there for you. but this is less than i want or than i expect and bad. it will be almost the same, but in fact it is not so, but there are a number of negative events, a huge number, which repels me very strongly from people. i can say that by some people. i'm just very well afraid to approach me right away. look again, it repels you. you will try now. don't push me away. yes, but to hear just for the sake of what you came for your own sake repels you, not how people behave, but how you feel about your expectations. yes, fears are

derivative opinions that this behavior is bad is wrong and should be different. here is the opinion. it is, of course, driven into your head by someone or even let's say by someone here, but this opinion of reality does not correspond to the opinion that you need to be completely good. as you an artist, and other friends. yes, it is erroneous in your head there is a map of this world, an idea of ​​\u200b\u200bthis world. and in this map, if it is correct, that is, it corresponds to this world. then we are guided by this map, we live, and what we expected, then got. but if the card does not match, then there are high expectations in it. false erroneous expectations, then every time we

fall into a hole, where we thought that there would be a bridge and pain for us. so how do you get a card? which corresponds to reality. there is no way to check , only you can understand, you can go and see what kind of reality it is and draw your map in accordance with what your artist is. yes, in this world we are walking on a huge beach. the sand on which it lies and we walk and sometimes we see in this sand some kind of brilliant uh sparks we bend down with effort. we raise this sparkle and look. no, it's also a grain of sand. good bad no song well, let's go on looking for emeralds and , probably, we will find to some extent, but most of the gems in this world, when they

are found, they do not shine, but once again study other people you have a ban on e for that, in order to discover their depth, people generally want to communicate about themselves, basically. uh-huh well, it's a behavioral story. want more communication. tell them what's stopping you. there, i do not know how to approach. here you have a machine at work with coffee, you run into a colleague who immediately pours herself this coffee. what's stopping you from asking? do you like it with or without milk? that's just what is called a smoltok. yes, it’s not very common in our opinion that this is not enough, it’s bad and should be deep no, but what, in fact, if we hypothetically imagine such a situation, and i ’ll come up as soon as i want to ask this question. it seems to me that everything inside of me will just go on strike and scream run why are you afraid? what will you get in return irritation or condemnation? why? what if

he didn't want to talk to me? and i just wanted michael to explain that the sweetest moments for a person. this is an opportunity to talk about yourself. yes , you ask, you do not say. listen , i like coffee with milk and two pieces of sugar, and then talk for 2 minutes. as you say, do you like coffee with milk. are you asking about him? make him nice to you, what a pity to give. well, even if he doesn't want to. so what, yeah, you know who's the best phone clerk who's the kind of person who 's calmly loyal when he 's covered up and laid down dead. he makes the biggest money ever, so ah. this is the fear that they will send me. it prevents you from being effective, on the contrary. set up an experiment. how many times do you need to be sent so that once someone talks to you about the story that

you have been sent so many times in your life that you just don’t want to. it’s scary to jump, you don’t want to jump, but it’s scary, yes, and fear is a derivative of your opinion that when are you sent? this is bad. they are the very fact that it is sent to you. and this opinion is erroneous, because when he sends you, it is good and bad. it's just the usual pretty common life now and natalia is often sent. i don't even have a problem sometimes. why yes i'll bet, dear michael and ok karin hear, oh well. it is we who have now slipped a little even such manipulations. yes, just practice. so i didn't agree then. why, because that's all? this behavior is possible, if you need it, you can change do you want to get something that you don't have? do something you haven't done before? change yourself. yes, but change if you need

these external signs. it seems to me that another problem is that karine is actually not very interesting people. you see, she wants friendship, but friendship is, after all, uh, dialogue and selling. and i don't think you're really interested. people would be very to themselves. i'm on the whole hmm enough. eh, i'm fine with loneliness. i'm in it stay. i'm not alone, nothing wrong. yes, you do not arrive in it. well, as there is no complete loneliness, you have communication, that is, in common with other people. just you this level of community with other people. devalue say that if you don't have what you want, then this level is zero. and this is not so. you know what perfectionism is, of course, it is the pursuit of an ideal, perfection is only good for an ideal. do you know what pathology is?