he will suffer. no, of course, no metaphors of michael khors. now it is important for you to understand what your beliefs are associated with these people. this is actually a fake, that is, a mistake. lies you deceived yourself michael why is she doing this? usually people who agree to relationships only with ideal people, how do they treat themselves too, how do you understand the ideal person? i'm so perfect and next to me not perfect. it just can't be. he they go he what is it? i need the perfect one to be around. yes, that is it really overpriced, and your attitude towards yourself is the bar itself. i raise it, i reach it, then even higher, yes, yes, wait, and i didn’t hear at all that she was looking for some kind of ideal. besides external data, i

heard nothing more. so, it is important to say in your head. i can be satisfied with what i have in general. you know the word happiness . it is very consonant with the words now. that happiness , in fact, is satisfaction with what we have now, sit down, write it down, because when we use fine motor skills, this is very good works to change our settings. yes, directly, write down, i can not strive, that is, i can strive, but i can someday get up and stand to live. just qualitatively and calmly with what i have, i don’t have to achieve something all the time, on the contrary, i took this type to show other women i’m leading this block that you can achieve something, despite the fact that you alone stayed there with children, you know, the second extreme. i'm not getting anything. first consist. i'm just

trying. i'm reaching. yes, healthy mental health in the middle. and here's another very important thing. yes, but the chosen one does not have to be perfect. well, it's not perfect for everyone for me. only it does not have to be perfect ; moreover, imperfection just makes people healthy. and people who like it when they see the ideal in them, that is, god yes, lie. yes , the ideal is god, and so here are the people who like that they conditionally kneel before them . they say you are my ideal. this is who narcissists, psychopaths, in principle, not very healthy addictions of your here are men your man was addicted was addicted. he drank. his parents were taken to rehabilitation in another city. everything was very difficult there for 3 years. he was in another

region and then came to moscow as he says, you know life from scratch again. you see, people are not bad it's important to just understand that building relationships with them. it's about building relationships with people with disabilities. it's just that they have a part of their personality damaged and you shouldn't expect any sharp, quick movements from them. well, no to that's another question. you build boy. yes, and i just thought about what is possible, this model of your relationship with men can be transmitted and somehow distort your relationship with your sons. you can lock yourself in your bedroom and say don't touch. yes, i think i spend the boys. mom, i see that everything is so whole here. the only thing that can affect your children in this sense is your feelings of guilt, which you experience is not

the model itself. it seems to me that they just see very clearly that this model is painful for you. i think your boys are straight in this sense, directly thank you, but you should not feel guilty in front of them. why because when we are in front of children, even the best ones feel guilty. whether we like it or not. they start us off for this feeling of guilt, and the kids instantly bellowed and walked out. i can’t stand them, i don’t show that i am yes , anyway, probably, yes, and you can have some recommendations. yes, it means something is wrong with you, something is wrong with natalya, and something is wrong with me, and with every person on this earth, something is wrong in you, it makes you cry the idea that something is wrong with you just because you decided that everything should be like this with you, the only person on earth, yes, you’re not mistaken.

there is something wrong with everyone. and you are a living smart girl, right? cry. let's see what's wrong with you. well, well, you don't have a man. well , what is wrong with me, something is wrong, but something is wrong, but if you continue the phrase, what is wrong with me, like that, as i want. alena dear, that's when you say that everyone somehow sees this way, again, a certain cover. here you see some woman walking with a stroller and with a child by the hand, well dressed, rested, i don’t know, and you begin to imagine yourself. here she is waiting at home, loving caring husband. he really appreciates what he does for him. and you look, and you've come up with everything. why not? do you know what's behind the doors? with this woman, you understand, you yourself came up with this story. i can, for example, their parents grandparents. well, everything was fine. no you don't,

none. no. where you are not, you saw exactly what your parents wanted to show you. and there is such a moment. they might be happy. they could forgive, she could ignore. they could move the focus to something else, you know, an important understanding, yes, for happiness it is the acceptance that life does not have to be perfect because of the weather. you're not nervous or nervous no , why is the weather not ideal ? this is a podcast of the psyche, we are discussing how to live when you cannot forget your beloved mikhail khors tells our heroine alena how to act correctly and how to think correctly? you sometimes go to the art museum, where there are paintings, yes landscapes, this and so on. have you ever seen an outstanding landscape or portrait or

some everyday scene. uh, recognized as a masterpiece, which would be perfect beautiful people, perfect brand new houses, perfect sky they are, think about it the next time you go to the museum. pay attention to this. and you will see that we are usually welcomed attracts. eh, those plots in which there is some kind of imperfection, some kind of break, asymmetrical faces, not very beautiful faded. yes, the collapsed bridge, this is interesting, you know, the ideal is not as interesting as it should be. different people can attract them in art in different ways. yes, but ah, there are fantasies there, and once again i strive there, just do not demand that it be perfect, because it will never be perfect, there will always be something to strive for. this is fine again, not ideal. there is only your demand of the devil. well, already

stop grown up. stop demanding. well, there are still people who also strive to achieve something or after work lying on the couch to talk. well, yes, no, well, lying badly lying on the couch after work is easy, because because you are so -so people yes, because i can not afford. this does not mean that , that is, how good you are, but otherwise it’s bad, too , you refuse this opinion of a man who, after work, lies on the couch , no one can force you to meet with such a man. we don't want to strange, but enter into a relationship with such a man and suffer that he behaves like this - apologies. not be reborn, because you can change, of course, and tried to change something you can people. well, let's take some time in this guy. eh, the only thing, really. uh, kind of a reason why he wouldn't be worth living with. it's that he climbed your phone at night. and what is most interesting

. it was with him that i had some such tonal unusual stories in my cell, and i went to the subway and took my paintings, and the name of the painting from the exhibition was written to take. she took them. e, and the name of the artist, when i come home i put the work. well we sit, eat, watch tv. my phone is lying without a password, they have messages in social networks. hello, i was on the subway with you. i liked you. so i decided to find you by the name of your name, vkontakte well, i found you. let's get to know this young man. what is i say, well , he read the whole situation here, of course not. we answered that even without being a delight, so to speak. listen mother. well, it’s all about looking at you the fuck. yes, that's uh-huh something else, if you didn't want this no one can force you to endure your reaction. and then you tried to return it, as i understand it, you came back to reconcile. i say, let's try first let's forget what was blocked after that, he blocked me everywhere, deleted everything everywhere.

all. he said that's it, that's enough. i'm already tired. i say ok. well, here it is important that he was not tired because of you, he became, because of his experiences, the essence of which he is, when i do not bring you out emotionally and still manage. well, because he, well, sort of distrusted. uh, jealousy, you see, it's not trust you. he doesn't trust himself. this is for him . he feels the dangers, because you are so beautiful. i just did not hold it, you need an ideal. and he, he thought, he thought, you can’t even imagine that he is there with one such psychotype throwing him. he somewhere feels like an ideal, he considers, especially in words. he needs to show a lot. and why is that, because he just doesn’t feel like that, he speaks according to the sign of the zodiac, and he is a lion in everything. that was his. and what he says and what he thinks are different things, so here's what's important again , yes. and of course people can be changed. the question

is how much we invest in it. and here is the technique for you and other wonderful active women in general. i believe that the future of russia is provided by women, men are more and more disappointing to me , especially when i ride the subway and see how they mean, how when i look how they are not inferior to women in the subway. i'm getting more and more sad. but in a relationship the most important thing will be now michael special equipment. how can you build a relationship if a man is still not up to you? listen, pretend, pretend to be fools, pretend to be poor, poorer than you are. pretending to be weaker than you are. so it is not necessary to always be sincere in a relationship and such as it is or such, or rather, as you would like to be, you can

pretend somewhere and in something. so you can not dump on your men immediately you understand yourself. let's now come to something even more important. yes, we realized that not with the first man, about whom we are talking with the second. and, well, you and i, probably, people will not want to restore relations, this task alena, i don’t feel like a psychologist, just because i’m not a professional. and here i am, as a professional psychologist, telling a journalist what and how a woman says, well, i don’t want to restore relations with a second man. and i'm telling you as an expert. you can do it or try it, but in any case , the responsibility is on you and do it, it 's better to restore or not to restore. just in a calm state, and not because you feel bad without them is the first. yes, and the second. now in this new status, realizing it , give yourself time to live and not demand from yourself. you will definitely start to do it right away once i realize that it's not. that it's. it's bad.

you know, i immediately demand from myself to change for tomorrow. no, you will suffer for a while and the third. well, start slowly. yes, that's right here to pronounce repeatedly the phrase that the absence of an ideal - this is not bad, this is not good either. it's just the norm. yes, alena is very like to suffer. she likes herself in this state. maybe because for some reason she loves, i heard such that when you suffer, you tell everyone how bad it is for me, everything starts to feel sorry for you and in this way. you want girlfriends, all friends get you like it when you feel sorry, but like it. well, the way we like it when it's already boring, listen, do you like it when you are praised and admired, like it, because you just turn the focus yourself. yes, there is alena suffering, attracting attention to this. you i'm sorry, the girls are calling. and there is alena

, such a wonderful one, this one, who is in social networks , everything in social networks is enough that everyone is happy, everyone rejoices not in this. you get some kind of response. yes, people who like what you do, oh, who i 'm teaching for free, even teaching how to create jewelry and do now caught fire. here , in terms of the strength of emotion, what we are now telling, she is well, almost the same as when you suffer, run, bath, cry, but agree. so maybe i fill it with this, in principle, this is a hobby that tells me do you remember michael, he told you, yes, he plugged the holes so that resources would not leak out and fill this vessel. well, here's the class, so let him fill the vessel fill with this. well, holes again, holes are negative emotions, negative emotions - this is not a consequence of what happens to you, this is a consequence of how you evaluate it. if you rate it just come up so bad. why because i want it differently? and how i want it good. here is the formula, it is not

provable. why as i want. this is good. why is it bad otherwise? these questions impossible to answer, because the truth is different than we want. it's just different, so once again, yes, it's not love, it's addiction, let's summarize, as it were, some results, here, the second. i give myself the right to get out of this addiction in time. even despite the fact that i have been in it for 7 years. so what, i just now realized that this is an addiction, yes, a spouse. i've been around for a long time. yes, it means there's a third one, it's not me that's bad. and he's not bad. it's just the way life works that people come and go. this is fine. i'm ready. try to build a relationship with her ideal man. with those ordinary good guys who change the pain there, they don’t hurt me, they don’t devalue me. here. i want to just try to learn how to do it and go into this, maybe go into this relationship with

regular guys, don't demand from yourself that this relationship is received. you can get into relationships, you won't be able to get into others , you won't be able to get in. over time, you will develop skills in new relationships with people who are not very ideal in your fantasies about them correctly. here, come try it. just give own time and at the same time that's feminine. yes , i do not have time, you know, lies, do you have time? how do you like our advice? something interesting got for yourself unusual love addiction different things hmm that you don't need to lose castles in the air, that it won't be so perfect is normal. thank you very much, well done thank you very much. well, friends, we took apart the pieces of the life of our dear alena, who wants to be perfect , maybe without even giving herself an account, so she builds castles in the air and sobs bitterly when

these castles collapse, but mikhail khors showed that's not really there, maybe happiness, it was a podcast of the psyche. thank you very much. beloved