[000:00:00;00] what you are committed to, then everything else simply ceases to have such meaning, but as soon as you give the assessments of others meaning more than commitment to your own goal, at that moment you find yourself on a very slippery surface where it will be very difficult to stand, because obviously for support, well, the most stable support is a triangle, that is, we need some three elements, so let’s try to look at them, what can you rely on? well, for example, goals, well, a goal, and a plan to achieve a goal, okay, well, and my actions, naturally, good, but come on, look, i will, for example , question your goals, your plans, and your actions, how you will build a relationship with me, well, i can accept the fact that you question this criticism and accept that if you criticize it, then you do not believe in me, but let us assume in yourself that you

cannot achieve this, cunningly. well, this won’t work with me, yes, it won’t work with me, in this sense, i won’t take on this part of your, your protection, i can just continue to act, look, you’re right you can continue to act, this is a fact, what you will rely on in order to what you can influence, i can isolate myself from you, just of course you can, and moreover, i ’m saying that you will have to isolate yourself from me, like from thousands of others people who may doubt your expediency, i don’t know there, your correctness and righteousness, sincerity, truth, it doesn’t matter, but there are also, for example, your principles, if, for example, you rely on your principles, then it will be much easier for you will build within itself the support that makes up your inner these, and not mine, for example, the morality that you will take for yourself, i will come to you and say, listen, no one does this, you’ve probably heard such an expression, yes, this won’t work,

no one does this don’t do it, they don’t buy an apartment, well, that is, people will say exactly that, and you, accordingly, based on your own principles, can say, no one has done this before me, but i will do it this way, for example, here is a very important aspect that's exactly what your actions are, yes it's from it’s up to you whether to do them or not, your principles, on the basis of which you will do, what third thing you can come up with, what would become the third leg on which you can rely, for example, my achievements, well, that is... ' any previous experience? yes, that is, the fact that i achieved something before , that is, i can at least repeat it, and if i can repeat it, then i can multiply it and, accordingly, thus arrive at my goal, as an option, in general yes, well, this helps me a lot in life, by the way, precisely the fact of past experience, this is the setting, the mood, yes, that is, there are three elements that need to be set up, standing in

the center of this train. you can then rely on this, you will not need the support of other people in this sense, i do not cancel the value of support, but waiting for this support is what makes you weak, well, i myself am shifting, let’s say actions to achieve this goal crooked path, that it will give me strength that others will think well of me, and this will help me move towards goals, this is not true, this is not true, because if you go with this... go and show others, look what, well, how would you a priori automatically give these people the right to judge you, well, just to get out of this scenario , you need to understand why, why interrupt, how you interfere with yourself, we have already understood how you can achieve, we have also already understood why to do this? well , the most important driver for me has always been, well, exactly the one that comes from the heart,

which is as sincere as possible, this is interest, that is, if i... something is truly interesting, then i always achieve it , you said a very important thing at the beginning, you said pleasure, everything that is necessary and necessary, i refuse to do it, i sabotage this process , everything that brings pleasure, i achieve it, but for me these are synonyms, one might say, interest , pleasure, that is, everything that is interesting to me, it a priori brings me pleasure, which means i need to find my pleasure in achieving these goals, from there it is not necessary it turns out. it turns out only from what i want. you are watching a podcast triggers. and with you is his leading psychologist, tatyana krasnovskaya. psychologist, psychotherapist, sergey nasibyan. we talk with pavel about how to achieve big goals, and where to get and draw strength for your own confidence and confidence in your life goals and actions.

there is also such a moment that there is also such a phrase in my head: i can’t want , well, that is, all my life i’ve been doing something essentially for someone in terms of what, let’s say, i have a family there, and i earn money there money for the family, yes, but there is a large share of mine selfishness, i do it all out of my selfishness for the family, but i understand that this is also an unhealthy model and, well, why should you do it for yourself, somehow it works, it’s for others, well, somehow you get ahead, why for yourself? it’s actually a good question, i don’t have the habit of doing this for myself, well, do you get up in the morning, make coffee, for example, or tea, for yourself? that is, there is a habit, but it is precisely such conscious goal-setting for oneself, such habits, and so it must be made conscious, look, these are very

small elements, because one morning you wake up and suddenly realize that it is more important for yourself to drink a glass of warm water in the morning rather than brew coffee, for example, yes, because coffee is part of a ritual that came from somewhere, well, let’s say and a glass of warm water is what would be good for you. with lemon there, i don’t know, with honey, who drinks what, yes, when you understand, well, first you can just start, but for myself, am i talking about coffee, peter levine has a good tool for working with trauma, and before in general, in principle, begin to self-heal trauma, he writes about this, and he says that first you need to get acquainted with your own feelings, and offers this tool, he says: look at some photograph, well, suppose we open a magazine. .. some place where they usually publish very rich, beautiful, successful people, we look at the fact that some blogger bought himself a rolls-royce, yes, what do i, what do you feel, looking at what this blogger is sitting there in this

rolls royce, you have a feeling, someone joy, some have envy, some have contempt, some have mixed feelings, he says, but how is this expressed in television, well, you will somehow find this in your television, but then he asks the question is, why did you decide what it is? feelings, why did you decide that this is your feeling? this question, this is a very important bridge through which we move to another way of perception, to a completely different way of perception, we seem to create a metaposition within which we are able to really see whether it is mine or not, mine i want to drink coffee now, or i just saw an advertisement for coffee yesterday before going to bed , and this is my desire to do this or that action, or i just think that all successful people drink a glass of warm water in the morning, because i read the top 10 tips from elon musk or someone else, but it’s kind of because

we don’t even notice how this very internal program is formed, and here, when i give the example of levvin, i’m talking about the fact that through such doubts we we are slowly establishing a completely different contact with reality with yourself in this reality. sergey, and you say that the sensation is in the body, and we ask the question: is this sensation in my body, but it is in my body, yes, at least it seems so to you, right here, no, look, this is not, not a medicine, this is not, uh, a placebo, this is not , not an obvious healing, yes, this is something through which we establish a new contact that was not there before, now you say, this is my feeling in my body, and you are very convinced of this, but i...', so to speak, relying on levin, i suggest you doubt this, and perhaps you will see very subtle elements where completely different feelings will appear, but what i really want, that’s what will appear there, that’s where the choice appears, that is, i

become disidentified, become unharmed with my actions, of course, that’s where the paul who - may really want, who may ask himself the question, am i buying an apartment, for whom? yes, of course, how will i feel when i buy it? i will feel myself, i recently wrote a post about how we very often confuse the absence of evidence with evidence absence, well, for example, my son says, i won’t believe in god until you prove to me that he exists, but neither i nor god need to prove to my son that he exists, but he says, like, here you are but you can’t prove to me that he exists, i can’t, but the absence of proof is not the same as proof of absence. when we transfer ourselves into our future, trying to form a vision of achieving a goal, we have no proof that i already have an apartment, and we begin to doubt it, it is

precisely in this doubt that we begin to arise the strings on which we play , which cause within us this deepest uncertainty and unwillingness to be disappointed in the end, makes us give it up halfway, that is, if i don’t have an apartment, it doesn’t... mean that i won’t be able to buy it, yes, i didn’t have an apartment, i’ve never bought an apartment, but that doesn’t mean at all that i can’t do it, i can face it, but that doesn’t mean that i can’t, you know, that’s how it is here. such a philosophical approach in this sense, when we try to raise this conflict to a level, well, such paradox, and here a completely different way of thinking is being formed, i think that some smart physiologist or neurologist will be able to suggest your problem, at least solve it by taking some medications or medications, dietary supplements there, and so on, because what can i say, it’s just

that you have a lack of, i don’t know, zinc in your blood, so you get tired quickly, that could also be the case, i suggest you look at it from a slightly different angle, precisely from the one that you don’t believe, that’s when you build these three legs inside yourself, that’s where that one will be born faith that moves mountains, as we heard, i will definitely try it, i have another wall inside, which very much hinders me in terms of not achieving goals in terms of doing for myself, this is what should be done for others , well, that is, how are you going to do it for yourself when there are so many others around who don’t have something, who lack something, and i understand that i ’m making this up myself, that they lack it, and this reaches the point of complete absurdity, and doing for others distracts you from yourself, so you mean it, it's not that it's distracting, it completely switches me on this process to the dependence on... because

there you get gratification very quickly, because where people said, cool, tablet, of course, this is a quick, instant nirvana, it’s like how we drank jupi as a child, thinking that it was orange juice, it’s just such an instant element of satisfaction, but if you start doing what we tell you, it will turn out that you will disconnect from it perception of fast, fast glucose, but fast carbohydrates. it’s always much easier to eat a sweet cake than to eat normally, yes, in physiology everything is similar for me, of course, so this is what we need to get to this through, that’s why i say, connect your body precisely by doubting whether this is mine, do i really want to do something for someone else now ? i am in no way dissuading you from altruism, but i can definitely say that healthy egoism, in general, will force you to do so that those around you you were people too happy, because then you will be happy too.

it just seems to me that you can become a real altruist only when you can be yourself, satisfy yourself to understand what is in this for me, otherwise it ’s dishonest, well, yes, here you already need to read the holy fathers, who, in general, do this many times described that we cannot give if we ourselves are not able to be filled, but from the point of view of support, so to speak, at the end of our conversation, i also want to tell you a very interesting phrase that at one time... shocked me, you need people’s support, right? and i will ask you a question, how do you support others? good question, if you dig deep, it turns out that i don’t give effective, high-quality support to others, of course, so give what you are looking for, learn to support others, and you won’t notice how suddenly, one fine moment, you are so easy you will support yourself so that you will not need others. that is why, in general, all absolutely

religions today that we know call on people, in moments of depression, there difficult life circumstances , pray for others, because when you begin to direct your prayer so that others are happy, others are healthy, the very power of your word, your intention becomes so strong that you just need to direct it to yourself, and you will already perk up, so give this support to others, support others and you will be surprised, but these are two non-competing tasks with each other, that is, first fill yourself, first, do not deviate from your goals, see that this is an achievement in this one when i will achieve this goal, what will be in it for me, and at the same time give what it will actually be filled with, you want to receive the support of others, at some point it will be the filling, such is the philosophical program we have formed today, let's? let's make it applied,

what exactly will you do? well, i already have a specific goal, i have an apartment, an apartment, i set it a month ago, i also have a specific plan for achieving it, great, but what will you do in the context of our conversation, that is, you essentially need to find three or four people who have the same goal and support them in this, by the way, it ’s interesting that this is not the first time in my life that i ’ve heard that this is exactly the method of achieving a goal, i they even suggested that you find the same people, help them reach this goal, then you yourself will come to it, so it’s as if you need some kind of committed action to douse yourself with cold water, right? no, but i actually have a committed action for this goal, i do it every day, great, then i wish you good luck, yes, thank you, i wanted to thank you for the fact that this format of programs, it helps, i don’t know, thousands, tens of thousands of people look at themselves from the outside, it helped me a lot, for which thank you

that you come and people can see it, thank you very much, thank you, thank you, believe me, and we also look at ourselves from the outside when we talk with our guests, especially. we are discussing how difficult it was for our children, well, you watched the podcast triggers with you were its hosts, me, sergey nasebyan and tatyana krasnovskaya, we talked with pavel about achieving the goal and how we could approach this issue differently. you are watching the precious stories podcast, and we, its hosts, are the director of the all-russian pushkin museum , sergei mikhailovich nekrasov, and ekaterina varkan, the author of surprisingly interesting books that are truly dedicated to jewelry, but

jewelry of a dual nature, these are various kinds of rings, rings, and so on, but most importantly, they are connected with the heroes of our culture, with our great writers, poets and people from their environment. today is our the podcast is dedicated to pushkin, and here i would like to share sergei mikhailovich’s doubts, but in general, does everyone understand exactly who pushkin is, and it seems to me that during our conversation today, we will try to somehow talk about this, yes , at least let's talk about it. as for a living person, in any case, i know that in mikhailovskoye in trigorskoye they pray for him as if he were alive , pushkin loved decoration very much, well , we don’t know where he got such a passion, maybe it’s from his ancestors, we know what do you have he had african blood, and in africa

there were stones, jewelry associated with witchcraft, expression there, and communication with deities, maybe from there, well , he had russian ancestors, and the russians were very fond of jewelry, alexandre dumote. when i was making fun of russia, i left the impression that every russian’s hand is studded with rings and diamonds, maybe that’s where it all came from, and we know that pushkin had about a dozen rings, well , quite expensive ones, two rings associated with pushkin's estate, that is real ones that we can see, and there are several legends associated with pushkin ... the rings that belonged to him, one of the first is a ring with a lamp, a ring that was made by a group of youth who called themselves the green lamp, which means that society,

green lamp, they gathered at nikita vselozhsky’s place, on the theater square, read poems, sang songs there, did a lot of things , here they are, which means that they define their community, some kind, their group, so to speak, commitment to each other, yes, they we ordered such a ring, so... we know about it, but no one has ever seen or heard him, yes, this is really so, by the way, the nikitilovsky house, where all this happened, has been preserved in excellent condition, and alexander sergeevich pushkin, when he met him, would later write that he was a momentary friend, his minute youth, and indeed it was connected with youth, it was connected with the freedom that pushkin felt after the lyceum imprisonment of a six-year-old, and of course, it was a company of young people. people who fully felt themselves to be people of their circle, their time, and behaved accordingly, by the way, if we talk about the passion for rings, for rings, then, of course, of course, this passion was, and not only

among pushkin, but among many others, his contemporaries, it is enough to recall the wonderful phrase of marina tsvitaeva, addressed to the general . horses, so it was a sign of the times, all this is really so, well, while pushkin is cheerful, young, fresh, there is, again , returning to the memory of the green lamp, that many of our acquaintances were surprised, passing by the house, seeing pushkin in the window, who that means, being brazenly shorn, he was waving he sang songs with a wig, which means he read poetry and said that i had a damn fever, so they cut my hair, about his fever there may be the wildest suspicions, what he was sick with, but in any case, the green lamp was

such a cheerful, energetic, young circle, which, thank god, well, so to speak, was called in time and stopped, somehow, because it had not outgrown some more serious, outrageous society, and we know, which means that in the lyceum from which pushkin graduated, there was also a tradition in the lyceum , issues ordered their own rings for graduates, but we know that pushkin’s graduation did not order rings , again it is known that several graduates had lyceum rings, which yegor antonovichard personally ordered for them, personally out of some kind of great love of sympathy, and such a ring was missed, and there is a memory that he wore this ring in siberia, they corresponded with ingelgart, here is his portrait by the way , and we will also show pushchin now, and the portrait of pushchin, he, uh, is really very good here, but as we know, pushchin’s fate was

very difficult, which was associated with the uprising of 1825, pushchin is one of these very notable decembrists, participants in the uprising, and of course, we - in due time we will talk about those rings, the rings of the decembrists, a famous story, but in siberia he had a ring. the lyceum ring, which we can also show, yes, it was, by the way, it really is cast iron, but inside is silver, this is silver, which means there is an insert on which are inscribed, these are the words, dates, names that were sometimes written for owners of these wheels, but it’s interesting that ingelgard ordered from metal, that is, cast iron so-called for as if he generally foresaw and saw, but cast iron is known why there is silver and gold inside, because cast iron does not live with human material and even from scandals, forged

rings, we know , they are lined inside with gold or silver so that a person can wear it, but besides the invention with these rings, we know that he also came up with the sign of the lyceum, well, you mean the coat of arms of the face that he came up with, it really is a sitting owl on the lyre and two wreaths on the sides: wreath oak and laurel wreath, oak as a sign of eternity, and so on, and laurel as a sign of glory, this owl sitting on a lyre, which the lyre is strengthened by a scroll, on the sides there are two wreaths, this is what engelhard came up with as the coat of arms of the lyceum, i will show you a little later this one - no, sergei mikhailovich, i know that you always intrigue us like this, okay, then i ’ll show you now, so, before us is the lyceum herp, which was invented by yegor antonovich angelgard,

this one is made of pure silver, here it is, it’s already presented here, it’s already ours reproduction, you see below the inscription 200 years, badges were issued right up to the closure of the lyceum until 1917, and each course marked its closest circle, that’s the one with the badge, and i ’m also a magician, sergei mikhailovich, you showed the lyceum badge, and so did i i’ll show it to you now, i also have this, apparently i also graduated from the lyceum , and then you and i will see what year, what graduation i am, we agreed, we’ll do this, so, but in the last few days recently this has just come in general joyful, so to speak, well, for me, at least, amazing i did not expect the message that there would be such a proposal and the president of the russian federation approved it about the revival of the lyceum as a higher

educational institution, which will be located in tsarskoye selo, in some places, so to speak, in some old premises, some new ones buildings will probably be built, in due time alexander ii, when he started the lyceum, we know that he was going to raise a new russian elite, apparently, this is... the same idea today, and it seems to me that you, more than anyone, are close this idea and extraordinary interest should call, and it seems to me that the only one of the main specialists in the lyceum, at least the old lyceum, is sergei mikhailovich, thank you, of course, this idea is very close to me, i am very glad that the president of the russian federation, vladimir putin, supported this this idea, but now we continue about the cult. after all, we have them, but again a ring that is not there, which is well known, because

after pushkin died, his widow allowed some things of alexander sergeevich to be taken as souvenirs to various people got various things, including a ring with a birch, from pushkin, which went to konstantin danza, a classmate, again pushkin’s policeman and his second, in general, this deadly duel, but unfortunately, danzaz he was an engineer, a military engineer and a lot traveled, so to speak, in life, he lost this ring, which he was actually very sad about, but he ordered it for pushkin as a gift, in my opinion, for his cheek, yes, absolutely right, let’s clarify then, it means he was actually ordered by pavel voinovich nashchokin, the closest

a moscow friend of alexander sergeevich pushkin, it was ordered in the spring of 1836, when pushkin was in moscow for the last time, and he really appreciated this gift, so, of course, it was a very valuable thing, and yes danzas was very upset when this happened, he i understood when he lost it, he was paying the cab driver in the winter, and the ring flew off his hand right into the snow , so no matter how long they looked for it, they couldn’t find it , but the gift was on the cheek, it seems to me that there was also not without humor and not without hints, because we know that after a certain prediction , one of petersburg told pushkin that he would die from a white man or a white horse, pushkin was very wary, wary of horses, and turquoise is considered a stone that warns against falling from a horse or some such things, so to speak, then they traveled not only on horseback, in a carriage, the carriage could overturn, in general there were a lot of troubles, and nashchekin thus hinted to his friend that now he

was not at all afraid of it, no horses, but here we can give too. as a betrothal gift to nikolaevna goncherova, he gave a ring with a birch tree; she was the best horsewoman in st. petersburg, this is true, by the way, not only this stone was considered a stone that protected against violent death, and as konstantin danzas claimed, on the day of the duel, just on january 27, pushkin went to the duel, not putting on this ring. we continue the precious stories podcast. today we are talking about the rings of alexander sergeevich pushkin. with you today is ekaterina varkan, the author of books on this topic. and i, the director of the all-russian museum of alexander sergeevich pushkin, sergei nekrasov. we have, to our great joy,

unlost rings, two unlost rings, which are again stored in the funds. your museum and one of them of absolutely extraordinary beauty with an emerald, uh, this ring, then , is depicted in the portrait of tropinin , aged twenty-seven, here are two rings, on his right hand, on the thumb of his right hand, this is just a ring with an emerald , which we just saw, the second ring, as contemporaries, so to speak, contemporaries recognized in it the vorontsov ring, lost, but then... we’ll talk about it separately, but the ring with the emerald , if i may, i want to say two more words, the ring with the emerald, it really was one of pushkin’s favorite objects, and it went to vladimir ivanovich dahl, this the ring, he said, is pushkin's, he already

wrote about this at the end of 1837, that when he looks at it, sparks run from his heels to his head and he wants, dahl wrote, to get down to something decent, that is, this is pushkin's ring, it did good, encouraged doing good deeds, which dahl wrote very well about, well, in general , it means that emerald, according to the stone calendar, determines that it belongs to people who were born in may, so pushkin was born on may 26, and we know that when he ended up in exile in mikhailovskoye, which means he wrote to his brother lev all the time, asking him to send this particular ring, but nothing, which means his brother didn’t send it, that is, we understand that this ring, we don’t know where pushkin got it from, maybe maybe he bought it, ordered it, someone gave it to him, but it’s a ring

he had an emerald until the twentieth year, and because in the twentieth year he left for the southern regions, before the twentieth year it was already said that this ring was chipped. well, it’s clear that, so to speak, no one will give or buy, so to speak , these are, well, fortunately , such things are acquired in the process of life and wearing, and i keep thinking, in fact, where this chip could have come from, i think maybe pushkin, he was a temperamental man, he beat on the door frame in a bad way mood, maybe he was giving domestic punishment to his servant, i don’t know, but i like the hooligan version, on the right hand, on the thumb, and there was this ring. well, not only did they open champagne with sabers, they opened it with rings, and perhaps this chip just happened from opening champagne, which pushkin revered and loved, but one thing is incontestable that pushkin

really loved this ring, one of his favorites, and that means twice to me i managed to be in this precious witchcraft, in his museum and see it means this is a ring, yes, but it was absolutely necessary at the time when you were writing a book about these rings. this is absolutely an impression, because you can’t touch it, but when you can look closely , yes, it’s completely different, and i tried it on with a ruler, which means the size of this ring, the diameter, it turned out to be 19.5, i went to the store , a jewelry store is literally around the corner, they gave me a handful like grapes, where these rings with different sizes hang, and they chose 19 and a half, i decided understand what size the ring was, here i just have this ring 19.5, here it is, the same ring as on my finger, that is, we understand that the size of pushkin’s hand was the same as mine, that is, this is a very small hand

, i have a small hand, but for a man it’s quite small, now we can tell you, the second ring, which means we still have pushkin’s, is also in sergei mikhailovich’s funds, it’s the so-called raevskaya volkonskaya ring, though... no one knows where it came from when it appeared, rather just during a trip through the crimea in the caucasus, when he was sent on a southern