tv Klub Veselikh i Nakhodchivikh 1TV May 25, 2024 9:35pm-11:51pm MSK
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and ballet, this combination of strength and softness is very inspiring, i am very impressed by russian ballet. this is delight, complete delight, and you can see for yourself how they greet you in china. the production has already been seen in shanghai; the second city of the tour was beijing - the first foreign company on the new stage of the national center for the performing arts, an ultra-modern theater complex. china is experiencing a real ballet boom. today there are children's sections everywhere, just like there were only 20 years ago.
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that's all, watch the time, stay up to date with the events, now on the air of the first channel, the club of cheerful resourceful people, the major league, the first quarter-final. good evening, good evening, dear friends, hello, my name is dmitry khrustalev, this is the major league of the club of cheerful resourceful people , the 2024 season is gaining momentum.
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the games of the 1/8 finals stage have already ended in the fight for the championship, there are 16 teams left, 10 of which are newcomers, which means we can rightfully call this season the youngest in recent years, today we will play the first game of the 1/4 finals, teams behind the scenes , spectators in the hall, the jury members are ready, the tv viewers have turned on the first channel, and this means we are starting kvn. friends, compared to the one-eighth finals stage, the stakes in the quarter-finals are raised, and of the four teams that you now see on this stage, only two will advance to the semi-finals and the next round, as you understand, what awaits us today... . an enveloping fight,
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so i can't wait to introduce the teams participating in today's game. we can safely say that they have already taken one title for themselves. perhaps the most musical team this season - kvn team, eurasia, chelyabinsk. young, metropolitan guys who spectacularly broke into the highest level. league team kvn. obarovich, synergy university, moscow. prominent representatives of the powerful school of tatar kvn, the kvn team karakus, almetevsk, republic of tatarstan, and the team that won at the 1/8 final stage, demonstrating its special. look at humor
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kvn team yuri ken, north ossetian state university, vladikavkaz. and i no longer see my question in your eyes, but who are the judges? and the judges, here with it is my pleasure to introduce them to you. the highest member of the jury, andrey kirilenko. the most beautiful member of the jury is yuliana karaulova. the most belarusian member of the jury, vadim golygin. the most elegant member of the jury, valdis pelsh. konstantin ernstv, chairman of the jury, general director. first channel,
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well, everything is ready for the game, let's start, good luck, thanks, friends, first. a greeting competition, where the teams are not limited in anything creatively, except perhaps by the time frame, so, the kvn team karakus, the city of almetevsk, begins, let's go, karakus, karakus, i’m standing on stage with a guitar, with the team we ’re back in action, even if we stumbled, but that’s not the main thing, now we’re in the mood, guys?
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stage karakus, and you know, today we have to jump above our heads, although the second game, can you, we have to jump above our heads, lef, what the hell are you talking about, why are you yelling at me, it’s actually my birthday, oh , yes, we remember, we remember, it’s his birthday, and since it’s kvn, the gifts will be appropriate, there you go, surprise, huh? and a broken string, a cool gift, a gbl speaker, why?
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dan, what is this? yes, i'm not here for you, i'm kirilenko, andrey gennadievich, i’m your fan, but can you throw in three rubles directly from there? look at this map, get out of here, and rav, it ’s only quiet now, look behind me , it looks like my pashva’s pants have burst, i understand, just without the fawn, please, okay, are you without panties or what? yes, be quiet, why did you put a butterfly on your lower back? shut up, okay, listen, is the butterfly flapping its wings? no, what about it? yeah guys, huh? friends, you better tell me where
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our alina is? and so she stayed in moscow after 18? oh, even alina, hi, boys, alinka, good to see you, ugh, gone, i didn’t drink lactose-free milk for 2 weeks so that i could hug a cow later, actually, i had a boyfriend in moscow, wait, you liked khrustalev, khrustalev, but he’s not my thing at all taste, so you understand, my new guy, his complete opposite, here he is, look, his name is ashton, he breeds rabbits for me and sells bathrobes, guys, you
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don’t need a super fast man team, you’re late, you don’t need it, get out of here, a? oh, look, it looks like the dart was poisoned acting skills, damn cool, shoot me too. i don’t understand, i’m just letting out the air, pash, well, of course, here i’m the only one saying, why, you’re a one-dimensional actor, that ’s not true, but i’m laughing in your face, son, mom,
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mommy, i want to be an aunt, mom he wants it too, but you see, he doesn’t. i deceived you, the evil wizard deceived us, my precious, this is a fool, well, in general, lukashenko showed it, so be it. yes, but are you capable of playing true love? yes, you love, i love, prove, prove, show, show. listen, raf, ah, i'm in one i saw the same scene in the film, show me, i’ll show you. antoh, what, rafa, if they put me in prison, will you visit me, i don’t know. will you visit or not? but how do i know, they’ll put you in prison, we’ll see, pashka,
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guys, have you seen the movie dune? no, then you won't get a joke, then get up, yeah! dear friends, well, finish, and you have some other number, show me, we don’t have any number, no, well, for some reason you they dressed up as biden and trump for the number, probably, but they just changed their clothes, well, well, i understand, there will be some kind of whiplash of satire, yes, that the old people’s flasks are leaking, something is good, this is at least incorrect. show people, they are the presidents of a great power, okay, okay, go then, they came back so
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quickly, i finish the song, karakus, our hearts are beating, our mood is karak, the mood today is karak, we are a nice funny team, karakus, and the viewer catches our motive, now we dance with you, we charge everyone from... a throw moscow, tatakhstan for us to be the highest league of paradise, thank you, where are you friend, our third friend, amazing!
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pechora. product of stellar group. vodka. veda, a product of the stellar group. old barrel cognac is a product of the stellar group. steersman bourbon is a product of the stellar group. to the seventy-fifth anniversary of the birth of lyubov polishchuk. everybody dance, she always captivated the audience, that is, if lyuba came out, the audience always accepted her, lyuba, lyuba, lyuba, everyone was a fan, everyone went crazy. let me out, it’s me, alone, i say, anyone, don’t be afraid to be ugly, she says, sasha, what, what, what to be afraid of, lord, the main thing is to work, play, play, do you even know what i came here for, why are you silent, smile, blink your eyes and remain silent if you can, forgive me, i remind you of someone, very strange, recruiter, she
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was... amazing, i always admired her, two people whom god probably created for each other, they could not live without each other as i saw them, love polishchuk, the last tango, we met, tomorrow at the first, on the birthday of larisa guzeeva, i was born yarosla at the time when all the young people dreamed of something else. i dreamed of becoming an artist, one of your first roles was in this famous cult series , change the meeting place, look, it was a crowd scene, everyone enters the theater institute a little sick in the head, with delusions of grandeur, we all go there as people artists, it was hard, but would you like your children to follow in your footsteps? no, my daughter, for example, is objectively much more talented than me, right at times, but she doesn’t
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like this profession, she chose what wind, what fate brought you to television, i was already like this... i ask for over 40, suddenly they invite me to try out for this program, let's get married, i watched, i think, my god, what the hell, where am i and where is television, podcast lab, tomorrow on the first, the greeting competition continues and on this stage the kvn team abarovich, university synergy, muscovites, tender grief, grief, grief, the land of magnolias, and you know that children born in 2006 can already be in prison, and we
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just want to start our performance. well , we need to be remembered somehow, so in order to be remembered, maybe we’ll tell the viewer our names more often, you know, denis zakharov, i understand, colleague, no, denis, you didn’t understand a little, no, i understood everything, people just won’t remember anymore one person from the team, look, in nirvana there was a bane jacket and... someone, in fact, in the hands up, sergey zhukov and someone else, alexey potekhin - it’s generally easy. our presenter previously starred in another program, he, dmitry khrustalev, and someone else were there, is there anything
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to add? i'm ilya shistov! to understand who will be imprisoned next, and i’m behind shabuddinova and blinovskaya, you need to watch the video from the patriks. hi, how much do you earn? 40 thousand per month. okay, stop, camera, look. this is just a video on the internet, you can say more, i said more, okay, look, let me ask you what you do, you can just go to anyone profession, add the word crypto, okay, let’s write what you do, i’m a crypto guy,
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i work in a crypto studio. i'm hemming my crypto pants, goodbye. when a woman is disappointed in her man, it is immediately obvious. val, tell me honestly, are you offended? no, where did you get the idea? yes, you’ve just been calling me by my last name for three days now, eh. sobov, zobov, now even my last name is not mine, i am ilya the sixth. val, tell me honestly, what happened? nothing happened, but like nothing, you persuaded the children
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to add biological to the word dad, look, i tell you i don’t cheat, i spend time, i give gifts, well, yes, i applauded once on the plane, lord, my husband is a collective farmer, i will announce this number to valya fiudosova. it seems to us that the iphone does not change from year to year because apple spends more time removing applications from russian banks. so, at the apple office, what's there? oh, that's it, the bank application has been deleted. yes, you wouldn’t be so happy, it’s like with the head of a hydra,
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you delete one, two new ones appear. so delete two new ones? i can not. why? now we don't know what they are called. no, they come first there were something online. then please don't delete it, this is not a bank. well, did you delete it? well, they asked, delete it! what is it? angry birds finance. damn, there's someone very smart sitting at the computer there. okay, let's make it inconvenient for them, let's block the most popular application in russia, what about government services? no, here you need to collect three balls of the same color. and a savings account is opened, how do they do that? dear tv viewers,
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if you didn’t like something in our speech, remember, the first channel is for free. like a hug or friendship? abarovich, thank you. moscow government for assistance in organizing the kvn games. the greeting competition continues now on this stage, the kvn team eurasia chelyabinsk. eurasia chelyabinsk. eurasia
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chelyabinsk. on stage is a team from chelyabinsk, a city located on the border of europe and asia. in the city of chelyabinsk, our hometown. 47 factories and one nuclear power plant, you can touch the air with your palm if you want, and a meteorite also fell, there was an explosion at a nuclear power plant, but we don’t have a hangover, because what we we breathe in its pure form, activated carbon, well, hello dear ones, we will burn out, but we won’t. well, we are performing for the second time on the first channel, we will soon be popular, they are biting our elbows there, oh my, already our elbows,
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let me remind you, this is aigera and she is studying to be an aunt from the registry. and what is your name? philip? there are too many mistakes in the word schmuck. philip. how did you even become a doctor with such a character? i followed in my parents' footsteps. my mother is a urologist and my father is a practical specialist. yes. and where did your parents look? in short, agera, why did you come out, huh? i want to share a joyful event in our hospital. here. and what is it? this is the boss, he bought a new mri machine. this is not an mri machine. should i show you the documents? ok, apparently, we will have to establish contact. aiger.
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i want to sign up for a free clinic through you, oh, yes, you are a martyr, okay, what do you have there, well, we have a song, raushan, announce, singers from god are singing for you, and not from yours, angelika isonbek, from my beloved girl there was a cat, she spied on us a little, then there was a dog, but it doesn’t matter, she looked at us, it wasn’t scary, and then a dragonfly appeared, i felt scared when we were alone, millions of eyes were looking at us, well what can i say, great song, well done, guy, and you,
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unfinished singer, am i unfinished? well, lips, teeth, breasts, where is it all? do we need to finish it? hera, stop interfering with our team? yes, i’m not bothering anyone, and anyway, what kind of team name is eurasia? well, here’s asia, here’s europe, it’s symbolic that two guys represent europe. okay, don’t pay attention to her, especially since our country has such a holiday this year. oh, now let us remind you, the arrows are spinning faster and faster, we will celebrate the anniversary, because everyone forgot one point, our sanctions are 10 years old, happy day birth, russian promotion brands, and building cars, from new pre'. friends,
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happy birthday, happy birthday, oh, here’s the birthday boy, sanctions, he’s already like family to us, sanya, happy birthday, dear, i would even say very dear, you know, we didn’t want to tell you for a long time, but you’re completely unplanned, by the way, we have a gift, here’s gin. your company, but i don’t want jeans from your company, and no one wants jeans from your brand, and also, you know, it was thanks to you that we learned that ivanovo knitwear is someone else’s sews that medvedev is evil, cola is good, you know, you are already quite big, but you still have trouble pronouncing the letter r, instead of a ruble you
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always get y... not in the year of the family, this will of course be said, but go away! otherwise we 're completely fed up. well, maybe it's time to say some words. for what? well, at the end they always say some words. in your opinion, andrei kirilenko, after the final whistle he goes to the center of the hall and says: what did we want to say with our play? the judges were great, the opponents, thank god, were funny, but in general i would like to say a big thank you to alexander vasilyevich maslyakov for creating such a wonderful club: cska, well, no, for the second
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time this year, the game is calling moscow, we hope. they will hear us on tv and radio. come with us, friends. we will say, chelyabinsk is on the first, look on the first. chelyab loves to sing. and kvn. kalmykia is called the birthplace of the wind; it is so strong here that many centuries ago it turned part of the land into a desert. in kalmykia it is said that
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the wind is only twice, half the year eastern and half the year western. how many arrows should a kalmyt warrior be able to shoot in one minute? minimum 22 arrows. we will shoot at the kalmyk, that is, from the ring. let, in every family there used to be a camel, where exactly the camel lay down, they tried to build huts and dig wells, because the camel feels the water, how can it show its dissatisfaction, bullshit, the life of its own, the premiere, tomorrow on the first. it will be hot, what, where, when, summer series of games, tomorrow, after the program time, the final greeting for today will be shown to us by the team
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with your heart , i'm with you, they sued. so i have an idea, anu, anu, interesting, interesting, to sweep hairdressers, make a train out of human hair and sell it to dogs with bad backs, who will buy them, dogs are stooped, who, people spend more on dogs than on pensioners, a lot, but not fun, someone i had to voice this, i said the problem, no one even moved, i thought they would go
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decide, you need to laugh, but only, now, now, now we will give it to you, let's give them what they want, come on, now, now, yes of course. and for starters, imagine in an amusement park, oh, i'm so afraid, don't be afraid, don't be afraid, i'm not afraid, for example, i'm not afraid, there 's nothing scary here,
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wake up, i told you, it's not scary, let's go, wait, we're not there , sorry, i forgot to announce. russian representative vasily nebenzya in the un security council goes here stand alone dad can do anything even if he can’t do something dad help me i saw you don’t sleep like that. you won’t fall asleep quickly, oh well, what do you have, mathematics, let me spit on this one time,
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so mathematics, grade, third, yes, i know, grade, my opinion is simple, so, masha had 30 apples, 30, and if one of us that he came then, well, this is a condition. i don’t need to make conditions, i’m helping out of the kindness of my heart, she exchanged five apples for a tricent, an umbrella, and you decide or not how many apples all the children have, i don’t know, all the children, how red they called, wait, what year, ninety -four, huh? write, you ate it a long time ago, this is
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mathematics, 27 years ago, you better do it yourself, that’s it, i’m wound up, so multiply the discriminant root by 12.42 cosines, it’s easy, you can do it yourself, the ship was sailing at a speed of 11 km/h. how long will it take him to reach the harbor? there according to the formula, yes i know, 11 multiply by the ship, ship, write, how to write it through c, i came, who will help my mother with the packages, i fell asleep again, i’m going, it’s difficult
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when you’re an ossetian by your father, and a romantic by your mother, do you hear ? , girl, what kind of eyes are these? regular eyes, your eyes are unusual, your eyes are deep, normal. uh, normal, your eyes are like lakes, deep, don’t like it , don’t look, pussy eyes, you have, i say, i drowned in them, what, you can’t drown in her, turn away, don’t, how can you turn away? the moon is reflected in them, how can i not look, everything around
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has darkened, where should i look into the emptiness, i don’t see anything, look at the emptiness, there’s a guitar standing up with these curves, the guitar is kind of empty, refined, what are you talking about, but because i’m losing words when i see you. go, go, let's get out of here, with your flying walk on the clouds, let's go to the gods, to your brothers and sisters, rustle, i'll go, come on, just take your ring, this is not mine,
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you need it on your knee, not this knee, why don't you want it without a knee? not enough, yes, here are three, if you don’t like something, get out of here and take your ring, what are you running, i’m not for you, eh, what are you running, but you’re standing at all, at least i’m running, but don’t listen to her, although don’t listen, she’s talking, how can you not hear, but she’s not the first, she’s not the last, but time will pass,
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she’ll regret it, anyway, yes, relax, dude, you'll find someone else, that's who it is, friends. agree, there are many people in the world, different nationalities, religions, confessions, they all have one thing in common, food, well, two. ok, water, ok, three, air, well, four that's all, ok, electricity, yes, that's okay, sky, yes, yes, yes, everything is similar, i get it, i get it, yeah, okay, that's it, that's it, i get it , okay, you see, friends, how much unites us. therefore
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friends, we are moving on to the second competition, this is a warm-up. with the jury members, each judge will now ask one question, and the teams will answer it as funny and resourcefully as possible. let's start, vadim golygin, with you, you are an experienced person in this regard. thank you, miss, good evening, one last time nowadays, scammers often call me with a lucrative offer: how to make sure they don’t call anymore. scammers often call with a lucrative offer, how to make sure they don’t call anymore, go to jail, they don’t call their own, it was obarovich, so karakus, the last one.
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chelabinsk. hello, doctor. good evening. last time. maybe another question on the topic first? well, yes, after the game you have to pay. what you prescribed to me doesn't help. vazik, let's talk about scammers. lately i've been getting calls from scammers a lot. a profitable offer on how to make sure they don’t call again.
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valdis, the next question is from you, please, thank you, thank you, i think that’s all, please tell me what to give an adult child for his birthday, so that on the one hand he would not be ashamed, on the other hand, so that he understands that he awaits in the future life. this is eurasia. valdis, please. what to give an adult child for his birthday so that he understands what awaits him in his future life. enema. yuriken. what to give an adult child for his birthday so that he did he imagine what awaited him in his future adult life? patak, so that life doesn’t seem like honey. so this is obarovich, what to give an adult child for his birthday, so that he can imagine what awaits him in his adult future
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life. snius, let him figure out what it is right away. so, yurikens, have you come up with something even funnier? besides patika, what else should you give an adult child for his birthday so that he understands what awaits him in his future life? i must say, my dear, but i’ll give you a car, and what else, i’ll give you money. a lot of money, what more do you want? maybe a wife for you give, you're an adult, right? well, let's go, but for the sake of literature we must add, as they say, andrei, andrei kirilenko, please, your question is the following, yes, why do referees referee in basketball? eurasia, chelyabinsk. why in basketball referees judge in the same uniform
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is not the case in kvn. well, you’re not the center here, do i understand correctly? karakus. why do referees in basketball judge in the same uniform, but in kvn, no. because ernst doesn’t want to dress like a golygin. and golygin cannot dress like ernst. okay, karakus. why referee in basketball? judged in the same uniform, not in kvn? because karavulova’s dress won’t fit on you. well, i spoke out. so, that’s it, andrey, thank you very much. i hope you are satisfied. juliana, now the floor is yours. warm-up question, pronounce my last name, do it loudly karaulova, thank you very much, i recently went to the cinema,
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popcorn costs more than a ticket, i have a question why, eurasia chelyabensk, i recently went to the cinema, and a cinema ticket costs less, than popcorn, why? because the ticket is not tasty, okay, let's talk, for money yes, so, i recently went to the cinema, popcorn costs more than a ticket, why? the grain deal had a much bigger impact than we thought. i was recently at the cinema. why does popcorn cost more than a ticket? now everything costs more than a ticket. yuriken, i recently
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surprise me, and what can you do? what knocked out the answers of all the teams, so no, karakus, how can you surprise me, i can commit suicide, what do you think, kostya, shoot, eurasia, again, and how can you surprise me this time, well , you came up with it, no, obarovich, how can you surprise me? i honestly don't know who you are. now everyone in the room is surprised. yuri ken, what are you doing? can you surprise me? well, i can, say,
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draw well. i’m playing... don’t be nervous, son, i’m hitting it with a sword, but i can do it 15 times, just please, and the most amazing thing is, i’m giving you this belt, now you have a bracelet, a periken, that’s it, thank you, this is the end of the warm-up, thank you. friends, evaluating improvisation is, of course, more difficult than prepared competitions, but nevertheless, dear judges, please, the scores for the warm-up, please, be the first, show, prepare, show the scores to the kvn team aborovich, 4, 4, 5, 5: 4 4.4 points
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4 4 4 4 5 4.2 points in the total for two competitions is 9.2 points. so, teams, get ready for the next competition. the hero of this video has a lot of arrogance, it seems to me that this is the most arrogant thing. i saw him, solidarity worked, i’m a redhead, he’s a redhead, i think we should take it. once they left him with me, my daughter went on vacation, i ran from the theater, i said, i can’t feed the hamster immediately, curtain, i'm a hamster's feeder, my man, man , grow out of me, how did you raise such a girl, it seems to me that everyone wants such a girl, now dad will tell you, probably the character of mom, you saw the video, watch with us, the premiere, tomorrow on the first, i welcome
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today day with calm confidence. i am in harmony with myself, yes, quietly, i have the magic of the morning, this is the liver, friends, that is where the gallbladder is located, something and... the life of the gallbladder, important and interesting, and not only that, in the program to live great, you learn the most important things about life and health. on monday, on the first. ranevskaya , you don’t know that they drew frankenbok from her without showing the picture, are you calling for an appointment? frekkinbock is seriously attracted to carlson. this is a cartoon for children from 3 to 7 years old. i'm trying to somehow justify my heroine. love for this fan makes a vulnerable woman out of an elderly sadist, her head is in the right place, they told me i can’t watch
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tv from morning to night, here you go, ranevskaya, from monday on the first there is my funeral , an orchestra is playing, instead of my photo there is a photo of frekenbock. third competition today's game - stem. it is based on the principle of classical dramaturgy. the teams' task is to present a solid performance with an interesting plot. on stage eurasia, chelyabinsk. go. according to. according to statistics, approximately 70% of those who left for kazakhstan 2 years ago returned back, and even more would return, but some abuse kazakh hospitality. so, an ordinary kazakh family, in which
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such a guest has been renting a room for three years now. yes, how tired you are already, please go home, yes, what’s wrong, what’s wrong, you’re kumiss warmed up, my name is nurodil, calm down, nurafen, that's it, leave, come on, well, you said that i was cool, the first 2 days. but then we realized that we don’t know how to drink so much, well, i made dumplings for you with a surprise, you know, when all the dumplings are made of beef, and one of them is pork, this is a bad surprise, they could
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have thanked me, i helped your grandmother with her move, where is the folder, where did you take it, why are you like little children? speaking of children, daniyar, come here, today is what day, saturday, and tomorrow, palm sunday, here how did you do it, and most importantly, why? yes , calm down, we are already like a family, we are sitting at the same table, gleb, but it is unpleasant for us to sit at the same table with you, why? come here, here. that's why, gleb! well, that’s how everyone eats dinner at my house. these are my panties. listen, well, come on, i promise to behave. exactly, exactly. world, ugh, what are you doing, explain
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why you came to us? oh, well, this is a state program for exchange, exchange, right? and then why is raushan still at our house, huh? it's been like this for 2 years. doesn't know what to do what to do, if anything, i’m in my jacket, you go ahead and pack your things and leave here, why am i bothering you, why are you mixing viagra into your grandfather instead of blood pressure pills, and where is grandma, where is grandma, hello, i’m following an advertisement for a room for rent , what other ad, who is gleb, me? “great, in general, look, your room is over there, come in, settle in, hello, are you a fool, did you rent out your room to him, or what, no, yours, and where we will be, you can stay with me, but only
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money for the first last month in advance, you idiot, let's just for the first, that's all, i went, i said, “i can’t leave, i have a girlfriend here, who, i can’t say, but you know her very well, grandma, where, where is grandma?” yes, i’m his girlfriend, and i’m pregnant with his child, how i’m pregnant, well, it’s your own fault, you rented out my room to him, so what? i lived there too, mom, congratulations on your grandson, you’ve found your grandmother, where’s your great-grandmother, here i am, here’s your granddaughter, take my wedding gift to you. , and you knew this about them all the time, or what? of course, i live in their room on the sofa, okay, let’s do it then, we’ll have a wedding, and i’ll take the ghoul with me, where, i feel good in kazakhstan, don’t worry, there are russians and kazakhs in chelyabinsk? they live together,
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to solve your problem in the region, you need to either lead it, or simply call the direct line with the president. direct line with president, we are listening to you. good afternoon, girl, this is the situation, i actually called about high prices for eggs and housing and communal services, but while the beep was ringing, i fell into an open manhole in the leninsky district. so, the prices for housing and communal services eggs don’t bother me anymore, just get me, please, i’m here. i'm lost, where
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are you? - probably under the women's dormitory, there are a lot of cigarette butts from thin cigarettes and negative pregnancy tests. don't worry, the issue has already been resolved. hello, i am the head of the leninsky district administration, valentin sergeevna, here are some sweets for you, here are the flowers. do you love dahlias? no, who doesn't love it? how did you end up here? and when you got through to the direct line, you looked at me so sternly from the tv, and i actually had mukhtar walking by. will you help me? yes, but how did you guess? officials do good deeds only in helmets. well, let's go up?
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yes, yes, yes, of course, you just need to wait a little. rescuers? no, television. this all needs to be beautifully filmed, solemnly raised, and immediately at a tea party with the governor. seriously, can we solve the problem? already decided housing and communal services know, they provided hot water. yes , i felt it was getting warmer here. that's it, don't worry, they will come for you. hello. i'm talking about agriculture, are you the minister? well, just 15 minutes ago, yes, you said something about eggs, you did, but that’s just now in general, we heard you, guys, bring it in, let’s unload it here, here, insert it, but now the eggs are somehow not in priority, wow, painted, yes, happy new year, huh?
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what should i do with them? well, can you post one of them ilya igorevich, there are no complaints against you, date signature, maybe you can hurry someone up? of course, of course, just wait a little, hello, mom, i fell, what are you doing, daughter, and here we have some people near our house right in front of the windows, they’re building an embankment, it’s so nice, it’s a pity, of course, we don’t have a river in our city . instead of just starting to dig, i’ll call you back, i want to go home, we... heard you, you’re renting, here’s a certificate for a brand new spacious apartment in the prestige residential complex, my wife’s design, we lived there for 3 years, we checked everything, we’re getting faster and faster to the top, me the children
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are waiting, oh, don’t worry about the children, but before this phrase i wasn’t worried about what was wrong with them, they enrolled at moscow state university. did anyone pick them up from kindergarten? we'll definitely pick it up. by the way, someone wants to talk to you. valya, valya, can you hear us? iss communications, we are now in orbit, it is very difficult here, but of course, not as hard as for you. we wish you good luck getting out quickly. thank you. hello, i'm from the department of transport, now you're going to give me a car, what are you doing, you're sitting here in the sewer, why do you need a car, here's a motor boat, let's
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moor it, listen, but we gave you category c2 eggs, you're probably c1 wanted, yes, guys, let's bring it here quickly. what is going on? who are you? there’s just such traffic here, i wanted to open the wildberries point, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, here are your kids, this is not at all... these are better, the olympic athletes caught right on a russian bear cub, a circus performance especially for them, listen, let's
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probably give you another ts0, come on guys, bring it, and stand there! what have you arranged in general, who are you helping, yourself or me, okay, colleagues, we really gathered here for one thing general business, photo for reporting. 6 hours after alexander ponayotov performed for valentina, she was finally taken upstairs and celebrated easter in a big way.
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the kvn abarovich team thanks synergy university, represented by the president of synergy corporation vadim georgievich lobov, as well as the rector of synergy university artyom igorevich vasiliev. the next theme is presented by the kvn team yuriken, the city of vladikavkaz. let's see. meeting a girl’s parents is important, but it’s important not to overdo it, i have strict parents, but you don’t worry, they’ll definitely like you, don’t worry, i’ll be a gentleman, come,
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hello, sister, she’s your sister, she’s young, she’s little. she’s like this, she’s a millimeter in size, here’s a newborn, hey, hey, what are you doing there, hey, there are adults at home, this is mom, it can’t be, she ’s younger, you’re an old woman, next to her you’re an old woman, she’s not old, but you old woman. what are you doing this evening? don't overdo it. do what you want. very nice, i'm tatyana. very nice tatiana. let me put some flowers in a vase, what kind of flowers, i was just holding your hand,
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i warmed my lower back, well, well then, sit down, yes , sit down, you have a cat, it’s dad, oh, well, a tiger, yes, here’s my handshake, oh-oh-oh, so strong, oh-oh-oh, an athlete, soccer player? well , do a somersault, borik, quietly, borik, it’s good that my father now has someone to discuss men’s topics, you’re glad, you’re glad, diparde, arsen, but tell me how you plan to make a living doing stand-up, what? i’m a stand-up comedian, that’s a humorous stand-up comic in the comedy genre, i don’t understand, i can
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show you, don’t, well, i’m already getting up, there atmosphere is needed, well, if the guest wants, let him show it, i don’t worry, i’ll tell you the best, turn off the phones, if the iphone, the button on the side, if. android, we will return your money, what money? there’s no more pouring at this table, he doesn’t like it when people tell him that, today there’s going to be swearing, what swearing, hey dude, relax, they’re here to have fun, hey, if you don’t understand, the security will come out for you, what, hey, what a dude, dude, calm down, borik, borik, stop all the humor here, security is in my house, the hall is dead today. my hands are itching, i need to do something masculine, here
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hang up a picture, because the nail is just sticking out, and where can you pee and wash your hands, along the corridor to the right, daughter, who did you bring into the house, but he’s normal, really, normal, he hammered a nail into our refrigerator. his legs are in our house, no matter what, your tap healed my hands, they can walk again, she won’t believe it, plan b, what other plan b, i’ll open it, who’s there, i came to rob her parents, so well.. . come here, don’t take off, don’t take off, i’ll rob you
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, the robbery will be merciless, my corpse will interfere with you, well, three, four, didn’t you charge the speaker? i was, i’m behind, well, what can i say, if it weren’t for this man, i would have robbed you, thank you, thank you, you are behind his back, like behind a stone back, mutually, mutually, mutually, i ’ve known him since childhood, i don’t know him since childhood, that's it, thank you, that's it, that's it, ger, mom, hello,
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you weren't hurt, i'm just hurt, i can't go, i'll stay to live here, i know he's not perfect, he has many shortcomings, but he loves me, he looks like you, this is not a compliment, friends. why this number? don't let disadvantages prevent the creation of a new family. he also talks to the wall. thank you. north ossetia.
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the final theme for today is presented by the kvn team karakus, almetyevsk, republic of tatarstan. let's meet! friends, this year in russia was declared the year of the family, and this is great, because the most important thing in the life of any person is to find your soulmate, and this story happened in an ordinary almetevsk cafe. about! it's a cool place, guys, yes, we'll definitely find girls here, oh, look at the three chicks sitting there, right for us, oh, girls, look at the guys there, let's wave to them, hi, look, almaya, my damn thing, what's on the edge, then my
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middle one, damn it, did i get the fat one again, waiter, yes, yes, ah can i please give a bottle of champagne to those three ladies, okay, it will be done, ladies, this is a bottle of champagne, for you, from those guys, oh, my favorite, gentlemen, i should pay for the champagne, damn it, i'm sick of it, na, na, oh , girls, the champagne went to my head, i’ll come now, okay, okay, dear ladies, where’s the one that was sitting on the edge, champagne was gushing from her throat, where is she, she moved away, well, i’ll wait for her here then, okay, well, she’ll come, young man, you understand, the longer you sit here, the longer she won’t come, i understand, i’ll be back in a bit later, damn it, i just returned, she came,
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listen, invite her to natalya, well, exactly, administrator, can i order some music? of course, you are very lucky, because today in our establishment there is a wonderful jazzman, deron williams. well, i drove, come on. hello, i wanted to meet you. maybe we'll sing with you karooki? wow, i love karaoke. well, then go ahead. i remember somehow approaching, approaching. how the parquet creaked, how i placed it on your table, pa-ra, a large bouquet of tea,
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come to me, how passionate you are, yes, i am so... come to me, hands, girls, it seems i have found a man for life , clueless, guys, it seems, i found it for today, beautiful, arsenchik, dear, i beg you, let’s leave here, i beg you, okay, let’s go to the garage a little, go gray, get high. well, i know you, you won’t miss a single skirt, but when did this happen, oh, what a hurricane, you who is the goddess of chicks, well, it began, here it began, well, here it began, oh well, that’s all you are, it’s just a second of confusion, this is for one time, uh, man, why are you hitting on my girlfriend, well, look, this he tells me
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, please call me, you’re telling him, yes, yes, i’m telling you, oh, seryozha, don’t, please, seryozha, eh, here, come, here, either go around, or here, go, oh, what are you allowing yourself to do, uh, man, are you groping my girlfriend, what are you doing, sick, alyuna, i feel discomfort, he crushed the woman, she ’s not breathing, uh, what are you doing?
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oh, what a terrible evening! you know, for me this whole evening is significant, because i met you, oh, it’s so sweet, and you know, the most important thing is that i understood what it takes to find your true love, that you just need to always be yourself with myself. and you sick guy tore my hair out, i’m sorry, i wanted to finish the theme beautifully,
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but well, we looked at all four themes, which means that now it’s quite possible that there will be a turning point in the game, the scores behind the theme can change everything. now we will see the teams on stage. so, grades for stem. first, let's take a look marks for the team of kvn abarovich. five, five, five, five, five, five points. exactly, the total score for three competitions is 13.4 points, kvn team karakus, please give them marks
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for the stem, five, five, five, five, five, five points exactly, for three competitions, they also have 13.4 points, team . eurasia, chelyabinsk. 4, 4, 5, 5, 3, 4.2 points, for three competitions 13.2 points. finally, the kvn team yuri ken, vladikavkaz. 5, 5, 5, 5,4. 4 8 points and the total score for three competitions is 14 points exactly. well, we have simply incredible drama,
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while it is absolutely unclear who will go further, everything will be decided by the next competition, which is called the team’s musical number, go get ready, the teams must show something musical or talk about music, that’s what it’s all about. whistle, whistle, i forgot there, vitaly gennadievich, yes, i will lead the music for you, and where is natalya vasilyevna, this is maternity leave, a secret,
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so take the ball there, don’t kick it, don’t sit on the sword, respect the ball, that’s it, i’m off, anyway -we were preparing for a regional music competition, our school had to win, and this who, why am i seeing this for the first time? she’s an excellent student, i got an exemption, why was she in prison for, damn, she’s so young, you have to value freedom, here’s an excellent student, you don’t need to look at the board, it ’s cool work, right, so that’s it, i’m off, there in biology the teacher doesn’t touch herself , closet, or rather, come on, that is, you can’t say that an athlete can’t say that, it’s not from the athletes’ hands, and i
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even replaced mathematics, although they think that it didn’t work out, but they think so, music lesson whistling, that what you do there in class music, musical hello, hop, hop, la-lay-lay-lay, hello, hello to win. you need to sing, first you need to stretch your ligaments, it’s like in the month of april, an old parquet dream, wait, something is wrong, well, squat, so sing, winged swing, but don’t sing, this is a song, this is how you need the ligaments warm up, thieves, so, you need to choose some
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turn it on, well, you can, but it’s cool, yes, yes , come on, it’s serious, a song in memory of arnold schwarzenegger, he’s been alive for a long time, since birth, the song was ahead of its time, snowger, you were a bodybuilder, why did you get involved with karatekas ... and maybe at the competition you will perform for us, we persuaded you, and you will dance, we agreed, well, we can’t wear sportswear, and it’s too late, i’ve already torn everything up, so let’s go on to tear it up, those same ones...
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chelabinsk. lately, everyone has been fighting for women's rights, but no one has ever fought for men's rights, and yet in almost every russian family a man is subjected to cruel treatment. don't try to escape love. you will be sent to the gym to correct yourself, my wife was in the salon, and i was cutting up smoked breasts like... sausage for dinner, i stopped being myself, i stopped being myself, even i stopped being myself, it’s even
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better for you that you i stopped being myself, there is a closet in the room up to the ceiling, where my clothes are not. in the house, where more often they make love to my head, yes, dear, yes, i’ll buy it, i’ll buy it, yes, i’ll be there soon. and i have a white ceiling in the room, clothes are scattered, i do whatever i want, because
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i’m single, i want to be you, and i want to be you. i so want to be you, and i want to be you, to be you for the second time, good luck, poor fellows, yuliana, we are addressing you as the only girl on the jury, you are the host of the program, who wants to become a millionaire, attention, question, gleb, are you in store, you want something, well, take it, answer options. chips, but i wanted some crab flavor, strawberry, champagne soap, pineapple, tomato, candy, flowers, pregnancy test, there are no clues and there cannot be,
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but you don’t know, there is no correct answer, we buy everything directly every time, guys, well, we still guys, stop putting up with this, right? therefore, we want to appeal to the commissioner for human rights in the russian federation. by the way, who is he? she, tatyana nikolaevna moskalkova. we are doomed. where are you? and i thought, as usual, i locked myself in the toilet. why did you decide to sing such a song? but not me, have we decided? no, not here fits. it doesn't fit here, it doesn't fit here. don't you understand? behind every successful one. how did you come up with it, how did we come up with it, we don’t want
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to leave love, for your sake we are ready to correct ourselves, i’m with the children, i’m in the kitchen, calling, we all voluntarily exchanged freedom for a woman’s breasts, i want to be with you, i want to be with you, and let it be so, a powerful family, like a fist with a family like a kula! i want to be with you, i want to be with you, i want
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to be so bad, we continue the musical number competition, on this stage is the kvn abarovich team, synergy university, moscow. film brother has become cult, including because the main character liked russian rock, but if he liked other music, the film would have been completely different. run away, take me, i want to go where you are, you, no, no money, no, listen, pay the fine, what the hell, excuse me, please, uh, who am i talking to,
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what do you want? apologies are not enough, i won’t do this again, i promise, what are you saying, brother, not my brother, you’re not my brother, our mothers are different, but what’s dad’s name, maybe brother, we need to check, uh, parents, don’t bother me, that’s it, calm down , you don’t have to pay anything, why are you... why are you contacting him, are you not local? i came to my brother, he ’s pulling me into crime, but i don’t want to, it’s scary, i want to hang out, that’s it, my stop, let me go, i beg you, because i’m already different, and the gap between us is here. hello, is there anything you want to listen to? yes, a lot of disks,
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have you learned? no, i don’t need that, i need something about love, the feeling of butterflies in my stomach, is there karaulova? which song? damn, i don’t remember the name, i can sing it. and i’m still waiting for you, sitting and waiting for you, you can’t imagine how good i feel when you kiss me, and also, yes i. listen, or maybe not, or maybe yes, or
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maybe these are all words, or maybe i, or maybe you, or maybe i love you, you know, i like to think, listen, but there is something like presnyakov, but not like that rough, something lower. more gentle than presnikov, just put your hand in a box with kittens, listen, you’re cool, there will be money, call, let’s go to a club, let’s stick out, there’s money, let’s go, silver, i’m going crazy, not a little, not a little. not enough for me, not enough, not enough, not enough for you, hey boy,
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bring us some vodka, we are a cosmopolitan cocktail we’ll do it, listen, what kind of event? well, it’s kind of like an invasion, only everyone has been washed, that is, not like an invasion at all, yes, and now meet yuliana karaulov! oh, koraulova is cool, at least i recognize the name of the song. when you’re next to me, i’ll give you, 100 times in a row, hands higher, peter, fuck it, okay, it’s fun here, but it’s time for me to go see my brother, i promised anyway. well, hello, brother, what
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are you doing in crime? i look at the latvian’s cabinet , and the belarusian’s. do you remember how you wore earrings at school because you listened to rock music, and i because it was beautiful, and remember how you starred in the best movie, don’t worry, you’ll forget over time, remember what the shampoo looks like, okay.
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you are my brother, you are replacing our father here, so i believe you, okay, come on, i found out that i have a huge family, a path, and a forest, you are not like that, you are not like that, oh, i remembered, finally , for you i breathe, for you i sing, for fate, here we are united in strong knots.
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you know, now for some reason it’s common to remake old films. here is a clear example of why you don’t need to do this, and tell your people who touch the guard to complain to the cops. the kvn team karakus almetyevsk thanks the tatneft company represented by general director nail ulfatovich maganov, as well as the tat-neft charitable foundation. meet on this stage, karakus, almetevsk. well,
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russians, springs, congratulations. the beginning of the largest flash mob in the country, in the sense of what, the dacha season begins, so we took the seedlings and went, white snow, gray ice, before we even had time to really get off, people rushed to the dacha, this is our kinetic code, ladas are floating around the city. one headlight provides heavenly light, yellow smoke emerges from the corpses of lada cars, the lada is 2 thousand years old, the paint has blown off from the light of a star named the sun, that’s it, the sun family has arrived, children, we are unloading,
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it sucks, the dacha is smelly, the car is a patent, leva, son, come to me. look how beautiful it is, the air is fresh, you see the fonta apple tree , my father planted it when i was born, i planted this apple tree when you were born, and you, when your son is born, will also plant an apple tree, no, i’m childfree, free , golden antonovka, the variety is unimportant, there are weeds in the field, come on, come on, come on, now at the dacha you’re already pulling up the weeds, an hour later there’s grass there again, after two there is even more grass, her shock, she is alive again, climbing into the bastard, so in a star,
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name the sun, so boring, maybe we can turn on some music, what kind of music, smart... in the city, of course, everyone is smart we’re the only ones left in the city, we’re the only stupid ones, that’s enough, that’s it, we’re all poisoning the beetles, that’s it, come on, come on, and 2,000 years, war, war for no particular reason, collecting beetles, the body of the young, and for this a son, a terminator, a killer of bugs, was raised, by surname sun.
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medicine against morshyn, he doesn’t know the word and there’s no word, vitya can only dig, he drinks, digs, digs, hello, head of the moskvina gardening partnership, seventy-fourth section, we rent for 500 rubles for what, we won’t rent anything for incomprehensible things, then. i’m looking to see if you’re bringing me my
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500 rubles or not, pamar mihal, excuse me, please, i’m getting upset, this is the toad of all areas, the head, the queen of all wheelbarrow people, a caressing blanket on her, the whole fur coat for 100,000 rubles. and... on the right hand, so see the sun, mom, dad, this all completely sucks, all these weeds, bugs, let's sell this dacha to someone, what are you, what are you you say, we are russian people, how can we russian people make other russian people unhappy, we lived there.
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that’s it, all we have to do is find out the final scores, and i can imagine how difficult it will be for the panel of judges now, because i remind you that out of four teams , only two should make it to the semifinals. teams stage. rosatom corporation has established a special prize for the team that performed best in the jury warm-up competition. humor is the inversion
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of common sense, the smile of reason, so to speak. and today the prize is a smile of reason from rosatom goes to the kvn team eurasia, chelyabinsk. well, before announcing the scores, according to tradition, we would like to hear the words of the jury members about this game. vadim, vadim pavlovich, let 's start with you, vadim golygin, i am incredibly glad that the stem competition has returned, and today the karakuz team from armetsky had an excellent performance, and there was such a correct enthusiasm, that is, which helped us all remember, that such a competition actually exists, that’s all i wanted to say, friends, a great game, and right on topic. in fact, everyone understands that everything will happen
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kvn team karakus. 4.4 and the total score is 17.8 points, the kvn team abarovich synergy moscow 5.555, all judges 5 points, and the total score for the whole game, 4 points, well, finally, the kvn team yuri ken, vladikavkaz 5.55, 4.8 points, and the total for the whole game, 18.8 points, so, friends, in today's game the kvn team yuriken vladikavkaz wins, i congratulations, you
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friday 22:00, people spend this night in the casino, which means i have a lot of work today, i’ve been working in this for 3 months now casino, everything is serious here, there are surveillance cameras around, the guards are former marines, but i know everyone, like a wife, everyone knows me, we can say one family. let's consider silence as consent, but she,
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apparently, is not yet ready for a serious relationship, she still hasn't been allowed to chat, mr. gold, a very demanding client, but i have studied all his special features. sometimes i hear things that i shouldn’t hear, but i don’t talk and i keep such things to myself, in general, everything is fine, but there is one nuance, in fact my name is michael, and i’m a swindler, sick spinarichya hindered him, but helped me. so who would let me near the shaffel machine, it’s a scam, this is also a game, i’ve been preparing for this moment for 3
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diana thought that i was going up to the crepes table to admire her, but i love money more, congratulations. much more, here comes the smile, thank you, step three, vip card, during the time i was serving mr. gold, i often thought about what to do with him, but i’m not a sadist, after the commotion i caused, the entire casino will be replaced by the game. and cards, sir, we have a technical hitch, please go to the vip room, while the security is figuring out what happened, the wealthiest players will be invited to the vip room, this
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is what i need, you will say with this trick 100 years, the security is already looking for the fraudster, that’s right, but this just part of my plan. step four. elevator, where is the vibration room? excuse me, but this is a technical elevator, sir, seriously, i have to figure out which elevator you have is technical and which one is not, this is not...
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what have you done to me, where is my money? take it, take it all, where is my money, what is it, what is it? no, no, no, not me, him, you took the wrong one, you took the wrong one, no, no. “i’m the owner of a casino, my name is victor, where is my money? i don’t know, did they look at the bank? listen, i’m your vip client, i was lucky today, and then some sharper took my winnings, i don’t understand what what a mess is going on here, wow, it’s a heavy hand, listen, shuler took everything, you need him, not
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me, you didn’t just steal my reputation, you know, you can’t fix it, i had to compensate the deceived players for it. losses, you will return to me all the stolen money, you have one week, why a week, yes i i’ve been preparing this thing for 3 months, and you, okay, okay, a week, i understand, well, oh, no need to say that we... will get you anywhere, you’re smart, you understand everything yourself, yes,
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memory, yes, by the way, they don’t make them like that anymore, oh mikey, i didn’t think i’d ever look for it... i see you, i was sure, you were hanging out somewhere on the islands with mulatto girls, leon, this symbol, what does it mean, don’t go anywhere, so, tell me exactly how it all happened. he changed the cards for me right in my hands. it changed your visual perception. look, psychics, shamans, wizards, etc., in
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theory, they are born with the ability to dive into their subconscious. imagine this... it's like a room where you can do supernatural things, your sharpie has the ability to, well, change what others see. leon, you better tell me how to find him. this is not even a theory, rather a legend. we are all connected through a common subconscious, there is an other world, space. thoughts, subconscious, with your mind you can go out of your consciousness into the world
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to control this world, this is a mirror of ours , but if you succumb to fear, that world will destroy you. “come on, leon, are you kidding me, that means my 5 million is also there, here, i’ve collected everything about superpowers and their owners, look in the office, but i still have things to do, besides you, three chords, a new season, tomorrow. people have been dreaming about a new man for a long time. since 1905, eugenics, which was generously financed by john rockefeller, jr., began to develop rapidly in the united states. it concentrated on forced.
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sterilization of disabled people, and social personalities of poor people. adolf hitler referred to american eugenics back in meinkamf. in germany. the primary task was to cleanse the aryan race of impurity. eugenics didn’t go away after the war, it just changed its sign and method. premiere, ordinary fascism 2 on monday on the first, i look at the mountains, there’s snow on the mountains, my first combat mission, it’s very difficult to fight in the mountains, you can’t smoke out the spirits from the cave, they hit you, 100 km from the state border, we must to ensure safety, in hands in half... mine, teeth, ears, hair can shake, but not hands. 1200 minutes rushed, the earth shook so much.
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