including with dmitry shavrin, and he, in particular, in his interview, which was included in this book published, said that our legendary, uh, composer, pakhmutova wrote denunciations to yakov, uh, to the central committee of the cpsu, that is , the highest governing body, for those who are in the tank, i explain, uh, complained about these very hit parades, that some incomprehensible unprofessional rock bands appear there. worthy songs, therefore, do not appear there, since one of the speakers of this book, that is, from the people whom i interviewed, for this selection was alexander borisovich gradsky, then he read the book , having familiarized himself with this passage of shavirin about the denunciations that pakhmuta wrote, he called me in a rage, well, as he loved. there with

swearing, that is, he masterfully owned foul language, first with an attack on me, i say sasha, well, you understand that this is direct speech, that so to speak, i kind of talk to a person, if a person needs to be told something, then i am generally categorically against cuts and censorship, i can either refuse a person at all, in principle, no, you won't be there in this book, let's say, but if i agree, then i can only correct some turns of phrase. unsuccessful ones there, having agreed, naturally, with the person who said it, because he has to put a visa, that yes, here in this final form his text goes, but throwing out something there, even something that puzzles me, seems untrue or strange to me, i can't, responsibility is still on him, he was an authority in this industry, i won't call him a critic, but a reviewer, so sasha asked me for shavirn's phone number he said, so he already... already

punched them in the face, now it's my turn, i don't know how their conversation ended, the clarification of relations, sasha categorically excluded the possibility of pakhmatova writing a denunciation, by the way, it seems to me, well, some kind of wildness, perhaps shavrin himself was told that she complained somewhere at some kremlin banquet, she could have told someone in a conversation that... there is such a column, such a hit parade, there are such and such songs in the first places some songs, it’s not even a fact that she meant her own, although she is a wonderful, brilliant, i would say composer, someone there called the editor-in-chief, the editor-in-chief called the columnist, scolded him, and dmitry could conclude that it meant that it was a denunciation, in short, here is jeans in this form, presence.

not so much trust in the press, as understanding that this word, if it is printed on a newspaper page, then this is some kind of ultimate truth , there is some kind of word of power, this is podcast. chronicles of the end of times and i evgeny

dodolev tell you about such a media phenomenon as jeans, a lot of people with we ourselves unwittingly journalist, well i speak for myself, deprived of jobs, some positions, i remember how my friend and i went during the winter student holidays to some boarding house, something there was either the wrong... room, or they didn’t check us in at all, or somehow the forces reacted in the wrong way to these forces, and this was the mid-eighties, that is , this legachev-gorbachev campaign the fight against alcoholism, when they cut down vineyards, when there were monstrous queues in the wine departments, they fought against the very scum, against our essence, that is , they forbade drinking, journalists worked on this matter, this agenda. returning from

i don’t remember the name of the boarding house, but it doesn’t matter from the moscow region, it was a raid, like a raid, from this raid we returned this article came out, this report about how in the pantheon in this, you won’t believe it, students drink, oh, it’s funny and sad, yes, this boarding house was on the balance sheet of the ministry of foreign affairs trade and - i don't remember what day of the week this article came out, but a weekend later there was a decree that two deputy ministers were removed, kamssork mgemo lost his post, because there were gmo students there, mostly kam-40 of some

course, a lot of people suffered, many years later, at some party i crossed paths with umar dzhebrailov, a very... famous businessman, entrepreneur, chechen, he said with a grin that he too was some kind of komsomol leader in gemo there and he also suffered because of the article, i i didn't mean it, it's just that, well, well, we went , our journalistic duty, we fulfilled ours , i'm not proud of it, but in short, i'm just describing the situation, how weighty the word was, and for words, for these... i repeat, they didn't officially pay, but people like, well, the same dzhebrailov, that is, future oligarchs, businessmen, they already clearly understood for themselves the power of this printed word, and they knew that in general journalists can be bought

inexpensively and they bought them, that is, these articles came out, the prices really went up very quickly, literally it was a period of 2-3 years before the official... here the placement of these materials, i'm not saying here that i'm so honest, incorruptible, i just don't know what i would have done if i had been offered money, i wasn't offered, i don't know why, but

i just heard from one, from another, like there once a person got a car, i think, like where exactly? it's close, in general, in short, somehow somehow i was unlucky, that's why in this aspect i remained an honest journalist, although you know, opportunities give rise to intentions, it's just that there was no temptation, that is, either demons interfered, or angels protected, later, when i began to deal with the business press, i first headed a business monthly magazine, a very famous one.

e a bank or some oligarch worked there, well , there was a whole team collecting invoices, professional people wrote, that is, it was a very high-quality product that the magazine decorated, i remember such an episode, i invited my friend mikhail to work vladimirovich leontiev, he combined this with his television work and was the editor-in-chief of the magazine, and i was, well, like the publishing director of this entire publishing house, where... he would often come in - he would come and say, you know, they are offering me money here, such and such, well , it was always decent money, that is, it was always thousands of dollars from five to 25, i like the material, i

will put it up, where should i send a person, and well, i would send him to the financial director, this money was sort of cashed out, in 2008, mikhail and i vladimirovich... we went to kiev to launch a franchise of our publication there, we published here in moscow under the license of a german weekly, a russian-language version and... our kiev acquaintances said that they wanted to publish it there in ukraine, so we went to launch this publication, and i, of course, was shocked at how completely different things were there, because my friends and colleagues were very offended when we said that well, we are older brothers , not in the sense that we are somehow bigger and more ambitious there in the sense that they are several years...

put men on the cover, because all the other women's magazines were, that is, there was what is called men's magazines - that means with women not always dressed or not very dressed on the covers, and there was one magazine where we published people, took money for it, well, officially at the cash desk, that is , how it was formalized, that is... we agreed with the person that he would buy official advertising for the module in this or that building, no matter where, there was simply an amount for the cover, that is, the cover cost from 25 then to 30,000, that was the beginning zero dollars 25-30-35 maximum, but i always explained during negotiations with pr people that this face that you want to promote, it will not only be on the cover, it...

mination on this or that basis i could not, so i decided to just name the figure, which is obviously unaffordable, i

will repeat again that the cover cost from twenty, 25 to 35 thousand dollars, i simply said, you know, we have everything reserved for the next few months, so excuse me, 150 thousand, imagine my surprise and displeasure, when my interlocutor, that is, this pr man grunted, said: "well, okay, how do you like it, in cash or, can i just transfer it?" i realized that that's it, well, we're screwed, that we have to answer for our talk, that we'll have to publish this cover, it was the most expensive of those i sold, i say sold by me, because i made the decision, the money did n't go into my pocket, from the covers i sold. we continue to talk about...

we met him there in some cafe and he said that he wanted - the current editor-in-chief this publication to talk to me, i immediately concluded for myself that we will have a different team, we buy only the brand, only the name, and i will simply explain why it is essential to buy the name, and

not to buy, let's say, a team or i don't know, a teapot. or a computer, everything that is on the balance sheet of this magazine, because under the name immediately, under this or that brand , an advertiser was built, that is, it was simply a business decision, because when some publication was created from scratch, first this is, so to speak, a publication is created, then its target groups are calculated, it is shown what kind of magazine it is, the advertiser takes a closer look, understands whether it is interesting to him or not, and such big network brands, automobiles , i don’t know, watches, all sorts of washing powders, perfumes, they, uh, the decision was made there in the city of london or in the city of new york, they simply knew that if such and such a publication appears in russia, then these or those brands automatically become part of this publication, they didn’t write them down, who would be there cover, what will be written there, because

there is a license, it is clear what format it is, what content is there, that is why i say again that i bought... exclusively this brand, especially since when a magazine brand is purchased, you have the opportunity to place there the materials that the licensor has released, that is, the publishing house that sells you the license, it provides you with the entire package of different shoots and materials that can be translated so that you can print them in your publication, so i understood, that it would be some kind of waste of time, and he came, he is very temperamental me... took off, that, look, the purchase should take place any minute now, and it is planned, they have the next issue almost ready, and there is a cover with a singer, some kind of, well, from the category of singing panties, and what is very important is that she comes out, because the shooting, by the way, was expensive, there several thousand dollars could be spent on renting - studios, on a trip

somewhere for such a photo shoot, because usually not just a cover was shot, that is, there was also the so-called, under the cover the material, that is, there are several pages filled with shooting and some photo was left for the cover, so he was so persistently saying that it was really important that it came out, that i, at that moment, when i was finishing my second glass of mineral water, decided for myself that well, screw it, well , this singer simply won’t be there 100%, and if he hadn’t come and said so, i probably would have used it with the already prepared material, than to shoot the cover anew or get it from the licensor or whatever bother, but when the issue was ready to be filled, i think we hired one of the hollywood stars as a licensor, put it on quite undressed, well, as the format of the publication suggests, literally a few days after the release of this magazine

, what are called serious people came to us. who said what the hell was going on, we paid 3000 dollars there, where is our cover anyway, i say, well, you are asking those to whom you paid, because we did not take money from you, that is, it was a sold cover, it was sold clearly not to the publication's advantage, a professional journalist profited there, a professional, as it turned out, in all respects.

in the early nineties, a new view existed in the project, the first private weekly in russia, he was my deputy and i consider him the best interviewer, well, magazine and newspaper, i actually recommended andrey vandenko as a person who does a brilliant interview for this person, and the interview was recorded, he was filmed for the cover, day x comes, when the issue should go on sale... and i get a call, again, here from the patient, he says what kind of, let's say, crap, like i just stopped at a gas station. there's a magazine there, on the cover there's a nice, well-known lady, i say,

well, i have nothing to do with this at all, i just recommended a person who will record the interview, well, i'll figure it out now, i call andrey, i say, andrey, what happened, there 's felix, very upset, raging and throwing, he in turn tells me, i call, you know what they did, well, yes, i don't even know if anyone has done this before or not, they one on the cover, here on the front, well , actually they put a lady's face on the cover, i don't know if they sold it or not, on the last page, well, which is also basically a cover, this is called the fourth cover, well, on the professional one they put a businessman, that is, formally they basically fulfilled the conditions, because the agreement was oral, that is, it was not formalized, they said, we'll put it on this kind of cover, i don't know how it ended there, because

well, he's a serious person and so to speak, it's unlikely he liked how they treated him, but i think that somehow this issue was settled, but with covers there were stories like this and i remember how in that... the very same licensed magazine, a men's magazine, i 'll explain it again, it's where usually quite naked girls appear on the cover of this magazine, in addition, we are also accountable to the licensor, because the licensor generally monitors what is happening in those publications that are licensed. i was contacted by the pr people of one mayor of the northern

cities, they said that they didn’t take him on the cover and this edition too, because it’s in a business building, and i just for fun, i say, i’ll find out now, i ’ll just call our licensor in the city of london and... i’ll ask, is it possible to solve it, because the covers, the fact that we sell the covers, they knew that we were getting money, because this money was cashed, that is , it wasn’t just jeans, in its pure form, so i call london, ask the curator, i say, andrey, we have an official like that, he recorded a video and is generally very advanced, wants to be on the cover, well, roughly understanding what the reaction will be, with a completely impeccable,

since we had such a large package fall through, we have already prepared some money, to hire a girl somewhere in pr or something, i say, for god's sake send it, let's see what kind of girl came, the girl parked right on the big androinskaya street, we had an office building of a publishing house, there are tram tracks there, she parked right on the tram tracks bentley, everything as it should be. she arrives there already by the time she got to my office, she was already a couple of trams away from both sides, she was coming in absolutely

nicely, without any show-offs, that is, i would never have said that she had arrived in a bentley, but i couldn't help myself, i said, and i said, who's your dad? she said, my dad is a builder, she said, and later it turned out that he was in charge of the development of our entire north there. and so on, but, by the way, she worked very efficiently, everyone was happy, that is , this story didn't end with the cover, but it ended with me finding a very efficient employee, which actually did not have to be paid a salary, and which, by the way, did not claim to be featured on the cover, because there were such employees, i even once in this same magazine - decided to arrange, so as not to pay the models, i offered... the girls working in the publishing house, i repeat, there were about ten publications, to do photo shoots, if they were ready to undress, then like ours, our girls

of our publishing house... i thought, well, i 'll have to persuade, you know, i had to build a filter, because well, very many wanted to, my niece worked in this publishing house on the blocks, i couldn't refuse her, although i must say that i later received a very strict, scolding from my relatives after this issue came out. we practiced such sessions, that is, in addition to covers, we did there, for example, well, there are restaurant chains, when a restaurateur has several establishments, we did girls, a waitress from one restaurant, a hostess from another cafe, a director from a third coffee shop, such a thing, we ourselves came up with it, i i mentioned my niece who

was involved in blocks, what are blocks? these are things too, which are very close to jeans, this is when some organization, i dealt with an airline, the largest one, i won't name it, it pays so that no one writes about it at all, so that it is not mentioned, that is, i had a special person sitting in the editorial system, looking through so that the name of this airline did not appear in any... material in any of the magazines , decent money was paid, that is, somewhere around 10,000 euros a month for each publication, that is, 100,000 euros a month were paid, that is, more than about one and a half million a year this airline paid so that it would not be mentioned, well, that is, when it needed to be mentioned, it paid separately, sent, and to be honest,

it amazed me, because for this money it would be possible to do some, well, i don’t know, well , do a lot of some, well, really some cool things, i don’t know, build a hospital, some kind of boarding house, some kind of charity, then they would simply write people themselves, there would be no need to pay for it, it would be possible to come up with some great promotion, but that's how they were afraid - people of compromising information, i mean that when you see something on the covers, it's all about money, when you don't see it... you know how in a movie you see this seminarian, no, but he 's there, that's the same story, that a lot of money is paid for something that you, dear viewers and readers, simply don't see, otherwise the end of times would have come, that was actually a podcast, a chronicle of the end of times, and i, evgenia, told you about it phenomenon, like jeans,

you can watch all the episodes of the podcastlab project. on the website of the first channel 1tv.ru. hello, you are watching the podcast triggers on the first channel. and with you is its host psychologist tatyana krasnovskaya. and psychologist psychotherapist sergei nasebyan. our guest today. tatyana, tatyana, hello, hello, well, tell us, tatyana, what did you come to us with, it is quite difficult for me to clearly formulate a request, i have quite painful reactions in family conflicts, i am married, every time we have some kind of quarrel with my husband on domestic grounds, there are just some little things, usually they hurt me very much, that is, i

somehow divide it internally for myself. that is, there is some rational part of me that explains everything, calms me down, supports me, there is some emotional part that is probably in the shadow of this rational part, which hurts, it is especially painful when the husband, for example, is late at work, it can be even for a small amount of time, 15 minutes, yeah, and for me it's like this drama is already hurting inside, it's already hurting that - let's say our agreements weren't kept, well, that is, we initially agreed, for example, for some time, and for me it's like this kind of blow, that means my word means nothing, i'm not needed, in general, and i don't know these 15 minutes for me they are very painful and the worst situations that happen in our relationship, when, for example, he leaves somewhere or i leave somewhere, and at the same time there is some kind of conflict, well, like well, go, that's it

this is from... the area, and i start to get sick, physically sick, that is, even literally last week there was a situation, he left for the weekend, it was a planned trip, everything is fine. he left, and i start to get sick, there is a temperature, something else, that is , i am physically and somehow apparently experiencing this, such a situation, and this is your first marriage, no, this is your second marriage, yeah, you have a child, i have two children, a daughter from my first marriage, now we have a son together with my husband, so it turns out the second, small, small, he a year and a half, or maybe it's banal jealousy yes, i thought about it, so and so, but no, well, that is, no, well, i, to admit such a thing, that yes, i, like, of course, this is mine, but no, i don't associate it with jealousy, because well, i calmly let him go there, we agree to go somewhere, he has some of his own events, i don't know, some men's business, trips, there are no problems in this, yeah, the problem

arises when there is some kind of conflict, for example, well, i don't know, for example, we had a fight, he is emotional - he can leave there, yeah, and he will leave the house there for a short time, so that this is well, apparently, well, to calm down. this moment, that let's say a person leaves, and i 'm all, well, inside, well, i don't know, i even know to the point of nausea that he will come there , everything is good, bad, that is, somehow like this, but what exactly is happening at this moment, well, he went to get some air, so that there i don't know, not to kill you, yeah, yeah, and what kind of nausea, why is it so bad, what are you afraid of at this moment, that he won't come back or that he will do something while he walks, rather, that... i have this feeling that, well, i didn't want cry, but something, well, that i feel so bad now that it’s as if i’m going to die now, and he left, well, okay, you’ll die, he’ll come, that’s it, you have to die in his presence, or

you have to do something, or you have to not die, i don’t want to die, not die, okay, it somehow depends on whether he’s nearby or not, whether you’ll die or not, no, it doesn’t depend on that, well it doesn’t depend, it’s just that there were some painful moments in life in general that were - i lived alone, i didn’t die, so i kind of understand that, but what moments are you talking about, if we take super early childhood, for example, i was in intensive care twice, i had problems with my lungs and they always took me away, my parents were not allowed there, of course, that is, i went there , for example, in an ambulance, i arrived at the hospital alone, alone and i remember it very well, then there is anesthesia, well , naturally you don’t remember, but you wake up. also alone, but you are very scared, well, for example, and how old were you? well, about three, but this is not for example, this is the place that hurts, this feeling is similar now, that you experience when your husband leaves

for that feeling when you woke up in intensive care, it seems yes, well, that is, it’s not about him, the thing is that this fear hasn’t gone away, it’s just - the most, and why are you calming yourself down? because it’s easier in calmness, well, calmness may be easier, but it will be more difficult to live through what we are now trying to understand, sort out, experience, it’s just the last very moment, well, emotionally it’s similar to what was there when i was 3 years old, that’s exactly when the moment of birth was son, we were supposed to have a partner birth, that is, my husband was supposed to be present, but... he wasn't in the city at that moment, that is, nothing depended on him, he was still a bastard, no, well, although he should have been there, he was just - all like that, well, that

is, everything that happened, he was very fast, that is, he was born very quickly, in general , somehow super fast, and my husband showed up when everything had already passed, actually, he came to everything ready, and the very moment... was such that - just when well, and they also lifted him into the ward, it turns out, there was just a nurse there looked and well, she also left, and already everything was as if some irreversible processes were already underway, and i , too, yes, i just at that moment very clearly felt, because also, that you are in a hospital and you are completely alone, and i really wanted, i say, for someone to be nearby, then it was just, it was very scary, of course, you joked that he is a bastard, but for me... i don’t think that he is a bastard, but for me it is also very directly, of course, very bitter, you don’t think that he is a bastard, but that little girl thinks that he is just better, because he is not nearby, because it is as if you cannot protect yourself, you have already grown up, you are an adult woman who

can generally somehow control her life, but no matter what you do in such situations, you still remain alone, and if only you could learn this, well, in the sense of getting used to the fact that in such situations you always. for some reason you always think that the next situation will not be like this, i just don’t know this, i don’t know how to find consolation inside yourself in this moment, that is, when i was little there, my parents gave me such a dinosaur, which in the hospital, as if reminded me that i was not alone, of course, maybe i need to get myself such a dinosaur, this dinosaur was more of a distraction. of course, you can get it now, but all

the same it will be some part of such an analgesia of the pain that you experience, and what if it is not analgesic, what if you live through it, well, now you were also scared, you felt uneasy before the start of filming, yes, well, it is exactly the same fear, like when you give birth or when you are in intensive care, the fear is the same. and there is no one around, how do you live through it from fear, i want to strangle it inside myself, and what will remain if you strangle it? well , i hope that nothing, that it will be somehow empty and calm, i am afraid that in emptiness there will be no calm, that's the thing, because this fear, it seems to tell you all the time that you are alive, it protects you in many ways, i did not think that fear could be a signal that i am alive, such a thought, and the main thing is... it is recognizable, it is like a signal that a reminder that

you have been in so many situations that could have ended, yes, badly, so to speak, but you have gone through them, you know how to be with it, and this is fear again, that is, in essence, this fear that was born there in the hospital, in intensive care, when you were left there in the emergency room, alone without your parents, if of course at 3 years old someone could have taught you that you need to interact with this fear, and not with a dinosaur, then this fear prompts, it shows you that the fact that you are alive, it's so simple, well on the one hand it's simple, and you can't reject it, you certainly shouldn't strangle it, you should stay in contact with it, well you have children now, if god forbid the child has something wrong with his health, you as a normal mother - accordingly you will also give him to the ambulance and they will take him to the hospital and he will be alone, and at that moment, what will

you feel when he is there alone, you as a mother, what will you feel? i don't know, it seems to me, my heart will break, well, that is, your parents too it broke your heart, well i think so, from which we can assume that your husband's heart breaks when he leaves to breathe, probably, if so, then what then, then it turns out that everything is fine, fine or not, i don't know, but at least... you have something in common that you can experience together, love, for example, well because, well you will still quarrel, when in these ssaras your husband leaves, he leaves because he cannot stand the pain that you cause him, or he does not want to cause you some strong pain, he leaves in order to breathe, but at the moment when he leaves, he feels exactly the same as you, the same fear, his heart is also breaking, but instead of joining in... this sympathy for his emotions, his experiences, at that moment,

of course, we think that the partner is a bastard who does not understand that i feel bad here, well, of course, he feels good, he is breathing, yes, at that moment your mind begins to come up with different kinds of explanations for you, for what reason you should be sure that you are right, and he is not, because that it's as if there's an idea that it's harder for me, that if there's a conflict in a couple, then it's harder for someone. one is having a harder time, the other one is fine, of course, he's breathing, everything's fine with him, well, yes, but they know exactly what they're talking about, at that moment, after all, it's very uh, our attitude makes us concentrate our attention on ourselves, this is such a higher form of egoism, well, because it hurts me more than everyone else at that moment, but this is not entirely true, because at that moment when we feel bad, others around us feel bad too. but to direct your attention to what others

bad, it doesn't seem possible, in fact it is possible, think about it, i have this fear, i'm afraid of him there, that i 'm going to die now, and he's not around, that i'm alone again, and no one is protecting me, and he feels the same there, experiences the same thing, just on the street, let's say, somewhere, i think that our conversation would not have happened if he had come back drunk after that, because he went out there to get drunk with friends, came back after... this experience, it can be yours in common, and yes, it will give birth to love, because that well, only love will remain. are you watching the triggers podcast, our guest today is tatyana, with whom we are talking about how to cope with the fear of loneliness in family relationships? it turns out that at the moment

of such a situation, in order to cope with it, you need to switch your focus to the experience of another person. first, you need to not look for a dinosaur, direct your attention to the fear that signals you that you are alive here now, and this is the first thing that will relieve, well, such a strong, unbearable anxiety regarding, well, the fact that i'm going to die now, that is, i'm afraid, which means i'm alive right here now, when this removes such tension from the fear of death, you will have the opportunity to transfer. attention to what your husband feels, to admit that perhaps he too now, what he feels now, this is not indifference, perhaps he also feels unnecessary, sergey said that i know what i'm talking about, it's true, yes, we are really married, and of course, despite the fact that we are psychologists, we just quarrel very masterfully,

and not us, of course, of course not, and what and what really helps me when i am in a moment of anger, rage, resentment, the feeling that i am not needed, i admit such a thought, i always succeed, but when i succeed, it is great, i admit that perhaps he is also not as good as i imagine, perhaps we are in the same boat, this experience, it is common, then, if he is also feeling bad, then this levels our positions, then i begin to think, okay, so i am not alone, who is in turmoil? well, peace, probably, with him the same thing happens, it allows me to come out in some kind of constructive way, absolutely for sure, well after a fight, when all the emotions have already gone, if there is some kind of constructive conversation, this usually happens, that is, he also says that it hurts me there,

it’s bad, i left there, of course, only at the moment there are emotions, as if you don’t see it, when everything is already over. well, of course, because we immediately run away into the tunnel, i’m not needed, yes, but if we assume, after all, this is an equal situation, yes, it’s neutral, we don’t know whether it’s needed or not, then maybe it’s worth it choose, what if we need each other, we need each other, but we have such a conflict, then a lot of pain is removed, then you want to meet halfway, there is also such an important point that you are talking about, you say that...

but something at this moment gives you reason to believe that everything is very unfair? yes, well , let's talk about injustice, what kind of injustice is yours, well, if we exaggerate it like that, well, i keep our agreement, but he doesn't, always like well , of course, in my head it seems that always yeah, but in reality probably not, well i mean, if i remember something now, then he will also have something to say, of course he will. he will have something to say 100%, and what is the agreement, come at 7:00 pm or be home at 7:00 pm, there may be something from the region, i will be leaving work in an hour, for example, i will be there by this time, for example, preparing dinner, well there is something like that, that now we are all there with the whole family, and he can

stay there until everything cools down?