or manchester united, they start at this level, then they go on to bigger and better things. it doesn't happen for everybody, but everybody does it for the love of football. i don't think they start the grassroots thing with the goal of being a professional footballer, they probably want to be but realise that they probably won't. without grassroots, there would be football. there would not be football. what sort of a year has hersham had? for quite a lot of it, kids haven't been able to play. last year was horrendous because the season stopped and it didn't restart. this same happened this year, but with all the hard work they managed to get football going again. they all have played football, which is brilliant. we did see the season out with a break in the middle. ultimately, they are all playing football.

i still have the boys down here playing football. as a club we did really well this year. dave bradford. now it's time for a look at the weather with darren bett. it is still pretty cloudy but that will lead to thundery showers and they are most likely to develop across parts of wales and northern england. more showers arriving in scotland, the odd one for northern ireland. brightening up in the south—west of the few showers, still cloudy in the south—east but the rain and drizzle we are seeing at the moment slowly fading away, so the weather improving at wimbledon. top temperature day probably in glasgow at 23 degrees away from those showers. still some heavy and thundery ones this evening, tending to fade overnight, it does become drive everywhere. a lot of cloud around overnight, quite low cloud so it will be a bit misty in places and we will see temperatures down to ii or 12 degrees typically. quite a cloudy start again tomorrow. again, it will brighten up in many places,

some sunshine coming through, heavy showers more likely across northern england, scotland, northern ireland, some more cloud coming back into wales and the south—west bringing patchy rain so it will be cooler than today here. hopefully brighter skies and more sunshine in the south—east and east anglia with temperatures up to around 21 celsius. now on bbc news, broadcaster ben zand and four men from the world of sport and social media come together to discuss all the things we find hard to talk about — but should — in man up. for me i find it impossible to cry. like, i cover my emotions with laughter, joking around, being a fool. even when you are by yourself? ifind it so hard, i can't appear to be weak. so what's it like being a man? mental health isn't always the easiest thing to talk about. but we also have a lot of feelings so we probably should. we've got five men in a room to do just that. this is man up. a room to do just that.

the first thing i want to talk about is masculinity. i've got quite an interesting stat here. it's that 36 of men alter their personality to appear more masculine. do you guys feel like you are currently altering your personality to be more manly? it depends on the situation, i think. sometimes when you are around a big group of boys, suddenly it's like you feel a bit more bouncy, you are a bit more like, yes, geez, what's happening? when really if you're around your pals you can tone it down a little bit. why do you think that is? i think there is a pride thing, whether it be in friendships or relationships, pride is a big issue. don't mug me off, don't make me feel small, it is a respect thing. i think it could be a defence mechanism depending on your environment. even growing up as a kid, i was a proper good, placid, happy—go—lucky child, and as soon as i went to secondary school it was like going into a zoo

so i had to get this kind of armour on me, do you know what i'm saying? that is where your masculinity starts coming from, for me. it's sad, though, isn't it, because i suppose that's the moment that you stop talking about your emotions so much and put up a mask a bit. i think as men we struggle to do the emotions kind of thing. - the masculinity obviously. is a front for a lot of things that we are trying to hide. would you, like, cry in front of your friends? you don't want to appear weak, especially in front of a group . of guys, coming into a new group i of people, you don't want to appear that you are less of a man than the man sitting nextl to you or standing next to you, do you know what i mean? - for me, i find it impossible to cry. like, i cover my emotions with laughter, joking - around, being a fool. even when you are by yourself, you can't? i find it so hard, man. - i can't appear to be weak. i think i was at a stage like that at some point. i felt like that when i was younger.

if i ever felt down i held it in and held it in and it led to the situation of self harming and stuff like that. it's the only way i could get a release from stuff, cutting myself. do you know what i mean? i used to punch walls and doors and wrecked my mum's house. my name's david cox, i'm 30 years old and currently play football for cowdenbeath football club in scotland. i've suffered from her mental health issues from a very young age, probably about 14 or 15 years old. and on a number of occasions i've tried to take my life. the pressures of playing football and having people knowing what's going on throughout my life and the issues i've faced, it's been hard. was there, i suppose, anybody

in your lives that you could talk to about your emotions? could you talk to your dad about it? no. i mean, i'm sure if i'd ever spoken to my dad about my emotions he'd have been fine with it. but ijust look at him and go, no way. going and approaching your dad with something like that and making yourself look so weak in front of the person you want to look the strongest in front of. exactly, it's this thing about being weak, where does that come from? why does crying equal weakness? where i was brought up, i was brought up with my brother to be a hardy kind of boy, you know what i mean? and it'sjust, i don't know, it's had a negative impact on my whole life. it is funny because we all are saying weakness is being sad. even i'm sitting here going, that is totally what it is, because it is so conditioned in our head. but then the only emotion men can express is anger. i recognise now showing emotions and being able to cry is showing strength. sometimes you can get stuck in a rut where you are so used to kind of suppressing your emotion for so long it actually becomes hard to release, do you know what i'm saying? inside i'm probably screaming deep down but i'm so used to not showing my emotions,

it is hard for them to come out now. sometimes you are forced to show your emotions, aren't you? you had a pretty bad crash in which kind of your whole career was thrown off. yeah. my name'sjames ellington, i'm 33 years old and i'm a team gb sprinter. i was a pretty successful sprinter. i had olympic experience. i went to the 2012 olympics for the 200 metres, a couple of world championships, and i also had two gold european medals to my name. in january of 2017 we were on a training camp in tenerife. me and one of my training partners went to go and explore and have a look at the volcano. and sadly on the way back down from doing the whole tourism bit we had a head—on collision with a can _ i ended up breaking both of my legs, my pelvis, tearing my abductors off the bone, fractures. you name it, i pretty much had it. a lot of people, rightly so, thought my career would be over, completely finished. and i'm currently still

trying to get back. i think being an athlete and having a mentality of always moving forward and looking forward, i wasjust thinking about, can i come back? so kind of maybe i'll deal with it in a couple of years time, maybe it will come out. but even to this day now, i think about it all the time, and obviously it has been a struggle and still is a struggle. but i haven't, which i don't think is healthy, i haven't shed no tears, really. do you think, because another stat is 42% of men think that they should be the main breadwinner in their life. is that something that resonates? yeah. if the bill came i feel a need to grab the card machine. you know what i mean? it's mine, let me put my card in. it makes me feel good to be able to provide, do you understand? it might not be the pc thing that i should pay, but i want to open the door, i want to pay for the bill, i want to come home,

you know what i mean? i'm not asking for dinner on the table or anything like that but i do want to be the alpha. it's kind of like you want to be in control? maybe, do you think that's what it is? you've probably got a lot of men that feel inadequate because you kind of go back to a traditional household 30 years ago or whatever, it would be the man going to work, providing, the woman looking after the kids. but nowadays some men might feel like they don't have a place, my mrs is earning more than me. you know what i'm saying? how you are going to pay— for diapers, rompers, wipes, food? i was always 0lu the footballer and now i'm just 0lu. - my name's 0lu, i'm 26 years old, | i started my career at tottenhamj from the age of 7 to 18. from there i moved from tottenham to norwich and from norwich - to falkirk in scotland. |my career, i'd say, has been a weirdj one because i've had so many highs. at the same time i've had so many lows. i i've faced an identity crisis -

where i was trying to figure out who i was as a person _ and the transition from everyday and the transition from every day training to then becoming, _ you know, your average joe was hard. i saw my dad being the main breadwinner all the time. . coming home late, working all hours of the night, - travelling up and down the country, being the sole breadwinner. - and i was thinking i need to be that. l i cannot not be the man that my woman looks i at me and is like, he a bum. at me and is like, he's a bum. i made decisions and decided to make money in ways that, you know, -

obviously i shouldn't have done. but i had to because i needed to be that man figure that she wanted, i you know what i mean? or that i felt that she needed. does it kind of apply to the image you project of yourself on your instagram? i was looking at it before. big expensive cars, six pack abs. ain't no six—pack anymore, boy, i'm telling that for free! i'm guilty of it massively. before i even had a big following, when i had one, two, three, 4,000 followers, which is still a lot of people, but you'd end up doing things purely for gratification. so like, i know for a fact if the sun is over there, the beach is over here, i would turn around, abs looking sick, who was going to like that? i'm going to look at that picture and think, cool, it took me ten pictures to get the right one. but i know when the likes start rolling in from certain people, a certain amount, that gives me gratification and satisfaction. that was before i had a big following. you get in your head about it, the more followers you have, the more people that judge and comment. hi, i'mjosh denzel,

i'm 27 years old, and you might recognise me from season four of love island. obviously love island gives you a huge platform, a bit of notoriety, i guess you could call it celebrity, which comes with many, many ups and downs. there is also a lot of pressure on you through social media, whether it is through your own doing, orthrough the public perception of you, what you believe the public's perception of you is, to kind of live a lifestyle. would you ever post on instagram, i'm feeling sad today? like, a kind of emotional post? i'm not someone who really talks about my emotions that much to my friends. but sometimes, i've not done it, but sometimes i think it is a big deal to put yourself out there, make yourself vulnerable to all of those people. for me, i think because of the industry i'm in, i know a lot of the people that i see on instagram in real life,

you go on their social media page and they look like they are having the best time in the world and they are the happiest people. and i know these people personally, and some of these people i know, obviously no names, are some of the most insecure people you will ever, ever meet. do you guys ever say to your friends, i'm feeling sad? like, actual sadness. i might feel a bit depressed today. i will freely speak about it to my best mates and stuff. i've got a manager i've been with for the past five years and the reason i stay and follow him is that he knows what he's getting, i know what i'm getting in terms of the mental—health side of it because i've had managers the past that have wanted nothing to do with me because i've struggled. even before i first came out in the papers with my story, i would never have thought about speaking about it. the dressing room can be the loneliest place in the world. what about modern day masculinity? would you change? what about modern day

masculinity would you change? who cares if a guy shows emotions? just because we are men it doesn't mean we are any different in the way we feel much of what women do, or anything like that. we go through the same stuff, feel the same feelings. so why is it ok for them to show there and we feel like we can't? has anybody experienced the pressure? i has anybody experienced the pressure?— has anybody experienced the ressure? ., �* ~ ., mm pressure? i don't know, maybe. when ou have a pressure? i don't know, maybe. when you have a headache, _ pressure? i don't know, maybe. when you have a headache, you _ pressure? i don't know, maybe. when you have a headache, you know- pressure? i don't know, maybe. when you have a headache, you know what. pressure? i don't know, maybe. when| you have a headache, you know what a headache feels like because you've had five before, all of your mates have had a headache. sometimes when i feel down you feel deeply sad for a period of time but you just go, i'm in a bad way, i'm upset, this is bothering me. i couldn't put a pin on it. ., , ~' �* , bothering me. i couldn't put a pin onit. ~ �*, , on it. people think it's 'ust somebodyi on it. people think it's 'ust somebody wakes * on it. people think it's 'ust somebody wakes up h on it. people think it'sjust somebody wakes up in - on it. people think it'sjust somebody wakes up in the on it. people think it'sjust - somebody wakes up in the morning on it. people think it'sjust _ somebody wakes up in the morning and lo, somebody wakes up in the morning and -o, | somebody wakes up in the morning and go. i don't _ somebody wakes up in the morning and go, i don't feel good today, and it's not — go, i don't feel good today, and it's not it's _ go, i don't feel good today, and it's not. it's more than that. you feel_ it's not. it's more than that. you feel terrible _ it's not. it's more than that. you feel terrible about yourself. you

feel terrible about yourself. you feel like — feel terrible about yourself. you feel like you are worthless to other people _ feel like you are worthless to other people i_ feel like you are worthless to other people. i used to wake up every morning — people. i used to wake up every morning and for a period of time think— morning and for a period of time think about, how can i kill myself? this whole — think about, how can i kill myself? this whole area for males in particular— this whole area for males in particular is scary. the fact that males _ particular is scary. the fact that males feel— particular is scary. the fact that males feel they can't open up and feel they— males feel they can't open up and feel they need to put on this face, and be _ feel they need to put on this face, and be big — feel they need to put on this face, and be big and tough, when really it 'ust and be big and tough, when really it just ends— and be big and tough, when really it just ends up with them having more problems— just ends up with them having more problems later on in life. you _ problems later on in life. you wiii— problems later on in life. you will see things on social media and start— you will see things on social media and start comparing yourself to people — and start comparing yourself to people. you get anxious about things — people. you get anxious about things. you know what i mean? there is so much _ things. you know what i mean? there is so much behind depression more than somebodyjust feeling i'm a bit clap today~ — than somebodyjust feeling i'm a bit clap today. as than somebody 'ust feeling i'm a bit cla toda . �* . than somebody 'ust feeling i'm a bit cla toda . . . , ., than somebody 'ust feeling i'm a bit clatoda .�* . , ., clap today. a man tries to commit suicide every _ clap today. a man tries to commit suicide every two _ clap today. a man tries to commit suicide every two hours _ clap today. a man tries to commit suicide every two hours in - clap today. a man tries to commit suicide every two hours in the - clap today. a man tries to commitj suicide every two hours in the uk, men are three times more likely to try and kill themselves than women and 22% of men say they have experienced depression. just

and 22% of men say they have experienced depression. just to say, i'm auoin experienced depression. just to say, i'm going through — experienced depression. just to say, i'm going through this, _ experienced depression. just to say, i'm going through this, from - experienced depression. just to say, i'm going through this, from an - i'm going through this, from an african — i'm going through this, from an african background _ i'm going through this, from an african background it— i'm going through this, from an african background it is- i'm going through this, from an african background it is almostl i'm going through this, from anl african background it is almost a taboo _ african background it is almost a taboo what _ african background it is almost a taboo. what do _ african background it is almost a taboo. what do you _ african background it is almost a taboo. what do you mean - african background it is almost a - taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and _ taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray, — taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray, going _ taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray. going to _ taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray, going to do _ taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray, going to do this - taboo. what do you mean depressed? go and pray, going to do this or- go and pray, going to do this or that _ go and pray, going to do this or that thats— go and pray, going to do this or that. that's why _ go and pray, going to do this or that. that's why i _ go and pray, going to do this or that. that's why i didn't - go and pray, going to do this or that. that's why i didn't know. go and pray, going to do this or that. that's why i didn't know ii go and pray, going to do this or. that. that's why i didn't know i was struggling — that. that's why i didn't know i was struggling with _ that. that's why i didn't know i was struggling with depression - that. that's why i didn't know i was struggling with depression until - that. that's why i didn't know i was struggling with depression until we j struggling with depression until we had a _ struggling with depression until we had a doctor— struggling with depression until we had a doctor come _ struggling with depression until we had a doctor come and _ struggling with depression until we had a doctor come and ask- struggling with depression until we had a doctor come and ask how- struggling with depression until we had a doctor come and ask how we| struggling with depression until we - had a doctor come and ask how we are and then— had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we _ had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we had— had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we had to _ had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we had to give _ had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we had to give scores, - had a doctor come and ask how we are and then we had to give scores, and l and then we had to give scores, and i and then we had to give scores, and i was _ and then we had to give scores, and i was thinking — and then we had to give scores, and i was thinking i'm _ and then we had to give scores, and i was thinking i'm below— and then we had to give scores, and i was thinking i'm below average - and then we had to give scores, and i was thinking i'm below average inl i was thinking i'm below average in all of— i was thinking i'm below average in all of my— i was thinking i'm below average in all of my feelings. _ i was thinking i'm below average in all of my feelings. i— i was thinking i'm below average in all of my feelings. i struggle - i was thinking i'm below average in all of my feelings. i struggle with l all of my feelings. i struggle with eating. _ all of my feelings. i struggle with eating. i— all of my feelings. i struggle with eating. icant— all of my feelings. i struggle with eating, i can't sleep, _ all of my feelings. i struggle with eating, i can't sleep, i— all of my feelings. i struggle with eating, i can't sleep, i have - eating, i can't sleep, i have anxiety~ _ eating, i can't sleep, i have anxiety. nothing _ eating, i can't sleep, i have anxiety. nothing i- eating, i can't sleep, i have anxiety. nothing i can - eating, i can't sleep, i have anxiety. nothing i can do i eating, i can't sleep, i have - anxiety. nothing i can do makes me feel anxiety. nothing i can do makes me feet good~ _ anxiety. nothing i can do makes me feet good i— anxiety. nothing i can do makes me feel good. i suffered _ anxiety. nothing i can do makes me feel good. i suffered with _ feel good. i suffered with loneliness, _ feel good. i suffered with loneliness, depression, l feel good. i suffered with| loneliness, depression, it feel good. i suffered with - loneliness, depression, it drove feel good. i suffered with _ loneliness, depression, it drove me to a dark— loneliness, depression, it drove me to a dark place _ loneliness, depression, it drove me to a dark place. with _ loneliness, depression, it drove me to a dark place. with everything - to a dark place. with everything that i_ to a dark place. with everything that i was— to a dark place. with everything that i was going _ to a dark place. with everything that i was going through- to a dark place. with everything that i was going through in- that i was going through in scotland. _ that i was going through in scotland, it— that i was going through in scotland, it made - that i was going through in scotland, it made me - that i was going through in scotland, it made me notl that i was going through in- scotland, it made me not want to speak— scotland, it made me not want to speak to — scotland, it made me not want to speak to anyone _ scotland, it made me not want to speak to anyone. i _ scotland, it made me not want to speak to anyone. i couldn't - scotland, it made me not want to speak to anyone. i couldn't reach| speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to— speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to friends, _ speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to friends, i— speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to friends, i couldn't - speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to friends, i couldn't talk - speak to anyone. i couldn't reach out to friends, i couldn't talk to i out to friends, i couldn't talk to family— out to friends, i couldn't talk to family members, _ out to friends, i couldn't talk to family members, i— out to friends, i couldn't talk to family members, i couldn't - out to friends, i couldn't talk toj family members, i couldn't talk out to friends, i couldn't talk to i family members, i couldn't talk to anyone _ family members, i couldn't talk to anyone de — family members, i couldn't talk to an one. , ., anyone. do you remember how you can i su ose, anyone. do you remember how you can i suppose, realised _ anyone. do you remember how you can i suppose, realised you _ anyone. do you remember how you can i suppose, realised you were _ i suppose, realised you were depressed?— i suppose, realised you were deressed? ,, . , , depressed? sitting in an empty room. i'd come depressed? sitting in an empty room. i'd come home — depressed? sitting in an empty room.

i'd come home from _ depressed? sitting in an empty room. i'd come home from training - depressed? sitting in an empty room. i'd come home from training and - depressed? sitting in an empty room. i'd come home from training and i'd . i'd come home from training and i'd have the _ i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv — i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv off, _ i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv off, the _ i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv off, the lights - i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv off, the lights off - i'd come home from training and i'd have the tv off, the lights off and l have the tv off, the lights off and i'd have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just— have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit— have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there _ have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there in _ have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there in the _ have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there in the dark- have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there in the dark and l have the tv off, the lights off and i'd just sit there in the dark and ii i'd just sit there in the dark and i 'ust i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be _ i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be thinking _ i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be thinking of— i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be thinking of all— i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be thinking of all sorts - i'd just sit there in the dark and i just be thinking of all sorts of. just be thinking of all sorts of stuff— just be thinking of all sorts of stuff stuff _ just be thinking of all sorts of stuff stuff i'm _ just be thinking of all sorts of stuff stuff i'm thinking, - just be thinking of all sorts of stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, i just be thinking of all sorts of - stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of— stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it. — stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it. this _ stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it, this isn't _ stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it, this isn't you, _ stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it, this isn't you, just - stuff stuff i'm thinking, olu, snap out of it, this isn't you, just be i out of it, this isn't you, just be nornrat — out of it, this isn't you, just be nornrat you _ out of it, this isn't you, just be normal. you can't. _ out of it, this isn't you, just be normal. you can't. playing - out of it, this isn't you, just be - normal. you can't. playing football every— normal. you can't. playing football every day, — normal. you can't. playing football every day, in _ normal. you can't. playing football every day, i'm earning _ normal. you can't. playing football every day, i'm earning money, - normal. you can't. playing football every day, i'm earning money, i'm| every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing _ every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing whatever _ every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing whatever i'm _ every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing whatever i'm doing - every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing whatever i'm doing and - every day, i'm earning money, i'm doing whatever i'm doing and i'm. doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not _ doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not happy. _ doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not happy. i've _ doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not happy. i've got _ doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not happy. i've got two - doing whatever i'm doing and i'm still not happy. i've got two boys| still not happy. i've got two boys now and — still not happy. i've got two boys now and that's _ still not happy. i've got two boys now and that's given _ still not happy. i've got two boys now and that's given me - still not happy. i've got two boys now and that's given me the - still not happy. i've got two boys - now and that's given me the strength to kind _ now and that's given me the strength to kind of. _ now and that's given me the strength to kind of. you — now and that's given me the strength to kind of, you know, _ now and that's given me the strength to kind of, you know, want _ now and that's given me the strength to kind of, you know, want to- now and that's given me the strength to kind of, you know, want to get- to kind of, you know, want to get better _ to kind of, you know, want to get better peobte _ to kind of, you know, want to get better. people may— to kind of, you know, want to get better. people may watch - to kind of, you know, want to get better. people may watch this . to kind of, you know, want to getl better. people may watch this and lo, better. people may watch this and go. yo, _ better. people may watch this and go. yo, i_ better. people may watch this and go. yo, icoutd— better. people may watch this and go, yo, i could have _ better. people may watch this and go, yo, i could have been- better. people may watch this and go, yo, i could have been there i better. people may watch this and | go, yo, i could have been there for you, _ go, yo, i could have been there for you. why— go, yo, i could have been there for you. why didn't— go, yo, i could have been there for you. why didn't you _ go, yo, i could have been there for you, why didn't you speak- go, yo, i could have been there for you, why didn't you speak to - go, yo, i could have been there for you, why didn't you speak to me? i you, why didn't you speak to me? it's you, why didn't you speak to me? it's easier— you, why didn't you speak to me? it's easier said _ you, why didn't you speak to me? it's easier said than _ you, why didn't you speak to me? it's easier said than done, - you, why didn't you speak to me? it's easier said than done, you - you, why didn't you speak to me? . it's easier said than done, you know what _ it's easier said than done, you know what i _ it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? — it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? for— it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? for me _ it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? for me to— it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? for me to come - it's easier said than done, you know what i mean? for me to come out. it's easier said than done, you know. what i mean? for me to come out and speak— what i mean? for me to come out and speak and _ what i mean? for me to come out and speak and be — what i mean? for me to come out and speakand be like. _ what i mean? for me to come out and speak and be like, yeah, _ what i mean? for me to come out and speak and be like, yeah, listen, - what i mean? for me to come out and speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm. speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm not feeling — speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm not feeling good _ speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm not feeling good today. _ speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm not feeling good today. people - speak and be like, yeah, listen, i'm not feeling good today. people will| not feeling good today. people will say, man _ not feeling good today. people will say. man up. — not feeling good today. people will say. man up. you're _ not feeling good today. people will say, man up, you're good, - not feeling good today. people will say, man up, you're good, don't i say, man up, you're good, don't worry _ say, man up, you're good, don't wor . , , say, man up, you're good, don't wor , , , ., say, man up, you're good, don't wor . , , . , worry. man up is an interesting line, worry. man up is an interesting line. isn't— worry. man up is an interesting line, isn't it? _ worry. man up is an interesting line, isn't it? has— worry. man up is an interesting line, isn't it? has anybody - worry. man up is an interesting line, isn't it? has anybody said j worry. man up is an interesting - line, isn't it? has anybody said man up line, isn't it? has anybody said man up to you and it's made you feel better?

chuckles it does the opposite, it rattles me, it gets me angry. it does the opposite, it rattles me, it gets me angry-— it gets me angry. footballers get it every time. — it gets me angry. footballers get it every time. how— it gets me angry. footballers get it every time, how can _ it gets me angry. footballers get it every time, how can you _ it gets me angry. footballers get it every time, how can you be - every time, how can you be depressed, and angry? you are doing what i _ depressed, and angry? you are doing what i wanted to do as a kid, you are living — what i wanted to do as a kid, you are living every boy's dream. james, did ou are living every boy's dream. james, did you have — are living every boy's dream. james, did you have to _ are living every boy's dream. james, did you have to deal _ are living every boy's dream. james, did you have to deal with _ are living every boy's dream. james, did you have to deal with any - are living every boy's dream. james, did you have to deal with any of- did you have to deal with any of this? with your career potentially on the line, it's your whole life changing, everything you have been working towards. you think that might be a moment some of these feelings may show.— might be a moment some of these feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initiall feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initially after — feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initially after the _ feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initially after the accident _ feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initially after the accident for - feelings may show. yeah, definitely. initially after the accident for the - initially after the accident for the first five or six weeks, it was nonstop with people visiting and people in and out of the hospital you don't really have time to settle and think about everything. to be honest, i know that was physically the worst point but mentally it was probably the best point and then everyone kind of disappears and then you are kind of left in this hole. i don't know if the therapist i had spoken to had been through any kind of depression or mental illness himself but it was just staged, you

know what i'm saying. speaking to someone else who might have been through a similar situation for me would have been more therapeutic. but at the time i didn't know anybody that was kind of in the situation i was in. you anybody that was kind of in the situation i was in.— anybody that was kind of in the situation i was in. you played for tottenham _ situation i was in. you played for tottenham uo — situation i was in. you played for tottenham up until— situation i was in. you played for tottenham up until you - situation i was in. you played for tottenham up until you are - situation i was in. you played for tottenham up untilyou are 18. i situation i was in. you played for- tottenham up untilyou are 18. when tottenham up until you are 18. when you got dropped by tottenham, can you got dropped by tottenham, can you remember how you reacted to that? n, you remember how you reacted to that? a, ., you remember how you reacted to that? a, . . , you remember how you reacted to that? . . , ~ that? mate, that was, ithink, the hardest day _ that? mate, that was, ithink, the hardest day of _ that? mate, that was, ithink, the hardest day of my _ that? mate, that was, ithink, the hardest day of my life. _ that? mate, that was, ithink, the hardest day of my life. what - hardest day of my life. what actually happened? - hardest day of my life. what actually happened? you - hardest day of my life. what actually happened? you got| hardest day of my life— actually happened? you got pulled into a room? it actually happened? you got pulled into a room?— actually happened? you got pulled into a room? it was right at the end ofthe into a room? it was right at the end of the season. _ into a room? it was right at the end of the season, i'd _ into a room? it was right at the end of the season, i'd been _ into a room? it was right at the end of the season, i'd been playing - into a room? it was right at the end of the season, i'd been playing with the reserve — of the season, i'd been playing with the reserve team, _ of the season, i'd been playing with the reserve team, training - of the season, i'd been playing with the reserve team, training with - of the season, i'd been playing with the reserve team, training with the | the reserve team, training with the first-team. — the reserve team, training with the first-team. it— the reserve team, training with the first—team, it looked _ the reserve team, training with the first—team, it looked good. - the reserve team, training with the first—team, it looked good. and - the reserve team, training with the i first—team, it looked good. and then something _ first—team, it looked good. and then something that — first—team, it looked good. and then something that you've _ first—team, it looked good. and then something that you've given - first—team, it looked good. and then something that you've given up - first—team, it looked good. and then something that you've given up your| something that you've given up your whole _ something that you've given up your whole life _ something that you've given up your whole life to — something that you've given up your whole life to my— something that you've given up your whole life to my you've _ something that you've given up your whole life to my you've sacrificed . whole life to my you've sacrificed everything — whole life to my you've sacrificed everything it's— whole life to my you've sacrificed everything-— everything. it's good if you make it, ou everything. it's good if you make it. you know _ everything. it's good if you make it, you know what _ everything. it's good if you make it, you know what i _ everything. it's good if you make it, you know what i mean - everything. it's good if you make it, you know what i mean come l everything. it's good if you make i it, you know what i mean come and you are at the top of the game. it was the same with me when i was at kilmarnock. i got released when i was 20, and it's the same feeling. you leave school, you've got no qualifications, no life experience

outside of football, you are chasing this dream. i was 15 playing in the reserves, started training with the first—team at 18 right through, making appearances off the bench and i was the only one making appearances off the bench for the team i grew up with, you know what i mean? and thenjust, we don't need you. that's it. nothing after it. it's just dropped, you you. that's it. nothing after it. it'sjust dropped, you don't you. that's it. nothing after it. it's just dropped, you don't speak to these people again and that's it. i think that's the turning point. that's— i think that's the turning point. that's when— i think that's the turning point. that's when i— i think that's the turning point. that's when i thought - i think that's the turning point. that's when i thought i - i think that's the turning point. that's when i thought i feel- that's when i thought i feel worthless _ that's when i thought i feel worthless. what— that's when i thought i feel worthless. what are - that's when i thought i feel worthless. what are my. that's when i thought i feel. worthless. what are my friend that's when i thought i feel- worthless. what are my friend is going _ worthless. what are my friend is going to — worthless. what are my friend is going to think? _ worthless. what are my friend is going to think? what _ worthless. what are my friend is going to think? what is- worthless. what are my friend is going to think? what is this - worthless. what are my friend is i going to think? what is this person going _ going to think? what is this person going to _ going to think? what is this person going to think? _ going to think? what is this person going to think? i've _ going to think? what is this person going to think? i've always - going to think? what is this person going to think? i've always been. going to think? i've always been that guy— going to think? i've always been that guy and _ going to think? i've always been that guy and now— going to think? i've always been that guy and now i'm _ going to think? i've always been that guy and now i'm no - going to think? i've always been that guy and now i'm no longerl going to think? i've always been. that guy and now i'm no longer that -uy. that guy and now i'm no longer that cu . ., . that guy and now i'm no longer that guy. how are you doing with your self-worth _ guy. how are you doing with your self-worth now? _ guy. how are you doing with your self-worth now? i'm _ guy. how are you doing with your self-worth now? i'm getting - guy. how are you doing with your. self-worth now? i'm getting there, i'm caettin self-worth now? i'm getting there, l'm getting there. _ self-worth now? i'm getting there, i'm getting there, i'm _ self-worth now? i'm getting there, i'm getting there, i'm getting - self-worth now? i'm getting there, i'm getting there, i'm getting a - self-worth now? i'm getting there, i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot| i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better _ i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better i_ i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better ithink— i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better. i think talking _ i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better. i think talking about - i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better. i think talking about it - i'm getting there, i'm getting a lot better. i think talking about it and | better. i think talking about it and actually _ better. i think talking about it and actually being _ better. i think talking about it and actually being really— better. i think talking about it and actually being really happy, - better. i think talking about it and j actually being really happy, rather than faking — actually being really happy, rather than faking happiness _ actually being really happy, rather than faking happiness is _ actually being really happy, rather than faking happiness is helping.

what do you think is expected of you as men? ., �* ~' �* what do you think is expected of you asmen? ~ �* , as men? you're thinking i'm supposed to be this person _ as men? you're thinking i'm supposed to be this person but _ as men? you're thinking i'm supposed to be this person but somebody - as men? you're thinking i'm supposed to be this person but somebody else l to be this person but somebody else wants— to be this person but somebody else wants you _ to be this person but somebody else wants you to— to be this person but somebody else wants you to be _ to be this person but somebody else wants you to be this _ to be this person but somebody else wants you to be this person. - to be this person but somebody else wants you to be this person. so - wants you to be this person. so let's— wants you to be this person. so let's say— wants you to be this person. so let's say you _ wants you to be this person. so let's say you are _ wants you to be this person. so let's say you are in _ wants you to be this person. so let's say you are in a _ wants you to be this person. so. let's say you are in a relationship now, _ let's say you are in a relationship now. i_ let's say you are in a relationship now. iwill— let's say you are in a relationship now. i will use _ let's say you are in a relationship now, i will use myself— let's say you are in a relationship now, i will use myself as - let's say you are in a relationship now, i will use myself as an - now, i will use myself as an example _ now, i will use myself as an example '— now, i will use myself as an example. ithink— now, i will use myself as an example. i think i'm - now, i will use myself as an . example. i think i'm supposed now, i will use myself as an - example. i think i'm supposed to be this way— example. i think i'm supposed to be this way towards _ example. i think i'm supposed to be this way towards my _ example. i think i'm supposed to be this way towards my partner- example. i think i'm supposed to be this way towards my partner but - example. i think i'm supposed to be this way towards my partner but i'mj this way towards my partner but i'm doing _ this way towards my partner but i'm doing the _ this way towards my partner but i'm doing the complete _ this way towards my partner but i'm doing the complete opposite - this way towards my partner but i'm i doing the complete opposite because i feel doing the complete opposite because i feel like _ doing the complete opposite because i feel like this — doing the complete opposite because i feel like this is _ doing the complete opposite because i feel like this is the _ doing the complete opposite because i feel like this is the way _ doing the complete opposite because i feel like this is the way it— doing the complete opposite because i feel like this is the way it is- i feel like this is the way it is supposed _ i feel like this is the way it is supposed to— i feel like this is the way it is supposed to be _ i feel like this is the way it is supposed to be done. - i feel like this is the way it is supposed to be done.- i feel like this is the way it is supposed to be done. i feel like this is the way it is su--osed to be done. ~ . ., supposed to be done. what way do you think ou supposed to be done. what way do you think you are — supposed to be done. what way do you think you are meant _ supposed to be done. what way do you think you are meant to _ supposed to be done. what way do you think you are meant to be? _ think you are meant to be? breadwinner, provider, protector. what _ breadwinner, provider, protector. what we — breadwinner, provider, protector. what we grown _ breadwinner, provider, protector. what i've grown up _ breadwinner, provider, protector. what i've grown up seeing - breadwinner, provider, protector. what i've grown up seeing a - breadwinner, provider, protector. what i've grown up seeing a manl breadwinner, provider, protector.l what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed _ what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to— what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to be _ what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to be as _ what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to be. as a _ what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to be. as a man, - what i've grown up seeing a man is supposed to be. as a man, you - what i've grown up seeing a man is i supposed to be. as a man, you don't want _ supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to— supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to come — supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to come across _ supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to come across as _ supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to come across as weak, - supposed to be. as a man, you don't want to come across as weak, you i want to come across as weak, you don't — want to come across as weak, you don't want _ want to come across as weak, you don't want to — want to come across as weak, you don't want to come _ want to come across as weak, you don't want to come across - want to come across as weak, you don't want to come across as - want to come across as weak, you don't want to come across as you i don't want to come across as you can't — don't want to come across as you can't provide. — don't want to come across as you can't provide. i'm _ don't want to come across as you can't provide. i'm not _ don't want to come across as you can't provide. i'm not strong - don't want to come across as you i can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you. _ can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you. i— can't provide. i'm not strong enough foryou. ican't— can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you. ican't do— can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you, i can't do this, _ can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you, i can't do this, i— can't provide. i'm not strong enough for you, i can't do this, i can't - for you, i can't do this, i can't let you — for you, i can't do this, i can't let you know— for you, i can't do this, i can't let you know my— for you, i can't do this, i can't let you know my emotions, i i for you, i can't do this, i can't - let you know my emotions, ican't let you know my emotions, i can't let you know my emotions, i can't let you _ let you know my emotions, i can't let you know — let you know my emotions, i can't let you know we _ let you know my emotions, i can't let you know we are _ let you know my emotions, i can't let you know we are struggling, . let you know my emotions, i can't let you know we are struggling, ii let you know we are struggling, i can't _ let you know we are struggling, i can't let— let you know we are struggling, i can't let you _ let you know we are struggling, i can't let you know— let you know we are struggling, i can't let you know times - let you know we are struggling, i can't let you know times are - let you know we are struggling, i. can't let you know times are hard. and for— can't let you know times are hard. and for me — can't let you know times are hard. and for me that _ can't let you know times are hard. and for me that was _ can't let you know times are hard. and for me that was the _ can't let you know times are hard. and for me that was the hardest l and for me that was the hardest experience — and for me that was the hardest experience ever. _ and for me that was the hardest experience ever. do— and for me that was the hardest experience ever.— experience ever. do you have expectations _ experience ever. do you have expectations on _ experience ever. do you have expectations on what - experience ever. do you have expectations on what you - experience ever. do you have i expectations on what you should experience ever. do you have - expectations on what you should look like? in what sense? like. expectations on what you should look like? in what sense?— like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham _

like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham we _ like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham we used _ like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham we used to _ like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham we used to do - like? in what sense? like, so come at tottenham we used to do body i like? in what sense? like, so come. at tottenham we used to do body fat testing _ at tottenham we used to do body fat testing and — at tottenham we used to do body fat testing and i— at tottenham we used to do body fat testing and i am— at tottenham we used to do body fat testing. and i am of— at tottenham we used to do body fat testing. and i am of a _ at tottenham we used to do body fat testing. and i am of a big _ at tottenham we used to do body fat testing. and i am of a big frame - at tottenham we used to do body fat testing. and i am of a big frame so i testing. and i am of a big frame so ialways— testing. and i am of a big frame so i always had — testing. and i am of a big frame so i always had to _ testing. and i am of a big frame so i always had to do _ testing. and i am of a big frame so i always had to do extra _ testing. and i am of a big frame so i always had to do extra running, . i always had to do extra running, extra _ i always had to do extra running, extra this. — i always had to do extra running, extra this, extra _ i always had to do extra running, extra this, extra that _ i always had to do extra running, extra this, extra that just - i always had to do extra running, extra this, extra that just so - i always had to do extra running, extra this, extra thatjust so i- extra this, extra thatjust so i could — extra this, extra thatjust so i could fit— extra this, extra thatjust so i could fit this _ extra this, extra thatjust so i could fit this image _ extra this, extra thatjust so i could fit this image of- extra this, extra thatjust so i could fit this image of a - could fit this image of a footballer, _ could fit this image of a footballer, what- could fit this image of a footballer, what a - could fit this image of a - footballer, what a footballer is supposed _ footballer, what a footballer is supposed to _ footballer, what a footballer is supposed to look— footballer, what a footballer is supposed to look like. - footballer, what a footballer is supposed to look like. and - footballer, what a footballer is supposed to look like. and it i footballer, what a footballer is - supposed to look like. and it didn't help because — supposed to look like. and it didn't help because i_ supposed to look like. and it didn't help because i started _ supposed to look like. and it didn't help because i started to _ supposed to look like. and it didn't help because i started to hate - help because i started to hate myself — help because i started to hate myself i_ help because i started to hate myself. i started _ help because i started to hate myself. i started to _ help because i started to hate myself. i started to think - help because i started to hate myself. i started to think i'm| help because i started to hate - myself. i started to think i'm going to start _ myself. i started to think i'm going to start starving _ myself. i started to think i'm going to start starving myself— myself. i started to think i'm going to start starving myself but - myself. i started to think i'm going to start starving myself but in - myself. i started to think i'm going to start starving myself but in turn| to start starving myself but in turn that just _ to start starving myself but in turn that just made _ to start starving myself but in turn thatjust made it— to start starving myself but in turn thatjust made it worse. _ to start starving myself but in turn thatjust made it worse. i- to start starving myself but in turn that just made it worse.— thatjust made it worse. i was readin: thatjust made it worse. i was reading you — thatjust made it worse. i was reading you lost _ thatjust made it worse. i was reading you lost 20 _ thatjust made it worse. i was reading you lost 20 kilos, - thatjust made it worse. i wasj reading you lost 20 kilos, was that just made it worse. i was - reading you lost 20 kilos, was it? i lost ten. when i was in hospital for about— lost ten. when i was in hospital for about four— lost ten. when i was in hospital for about four weeks i lost ten or 11 kilos— about four weeks i lost ten or 11 kilos in— about four weeks i lost ten or 11 kilos in weight. and obviously being a very— kilos in weight. and obviously being a very physical, capable person before — a very physical, capable person before the accident, to not being able to— before the accident, to not being able to move for four weeks and then when _ able to move for four weeks and then when i _ able to move for four weeks and then when i was _ able to move for four weeks and then when i was able to move looking at myself _ when i was able to move looking at myself in _ when i was able to move looking at myself in the mirror and seeing almost — myself in the mirror and seeing almost like a shadow of your former self, almost like a shadow of your former self. that _ almost like a shadow of your former self, that was tough to deal with because — self, that was tough to deal with because i'm used to seeing myself looking _ because i'm used to seeing myself looking strong, i'm used to feeling strong. _ looking strong, i'm used to feeling strong, and other people looking at

me as _ strong, and other people looking at me as a _ strong, and other people looking at me as a strong, physical individual. i me as a strong, physical individual. i was _ me as a strong, physical individual. i was bones — me as a strong, physical individual. l was bones-— me as a strong, physical individual. i was bones. ,, , , . .. , i was bones. sprinters are machines, aren't they? — i was bones. sprinters are machines, aren't they? that's _ i was bones. sprinters are machines, aren't they? that's the _ i was bones. sprinters are machines, aren't they? that's the thing, - i was bones. sprinters are machines, aren't they? that's the thing, my - aren't they? that's the thing, my frame is rrot _ aren't they? that's the thing, my frame is not big _ aren't they? that's the thing, my frame is not big naturally, - aren't they? that's the thing, my frame is not big naturally, so - frame is not big naturally, so everything i have is muscle on top and i_ everything i have is muscle on top and i lost — everything i have is muscle on top and i lost all of my muscle and coming — and i lost all of my muscle and coming out of hospital i felt frail. i coming out of hospital i felt frail. i was _ coming out of hospital i felt frail. i was the — coming out of hospital i felt frail. i was the strong athlete that was training — i was the strong athlete that was training every day and then i was in a wheelchair and couldn't do one push-up — a wheelchair and couldn't do one push—up. so yeah, i felt rubbish. in terms _ push—up. so yeah, i felt rubbish. in terms of— push—up. so yeah, i felt rubbish. in terms of body consciousness and social media and how you look, i've never _ social media and how you look, i've never really — social media and how you look, i've never really been too conscious of that _ never really been too conscious of that i'm — never really been too conscious of that. i'm lucky enough to have been an athlete _ that. i'm lucky enough to have been an athlete and always been in some sort of— an athlete and always been in some sort of shape and i don't know how i'd sort of shape and i don't know how i'd feel— sort of shape and i don't know how i'd feel if— sort of shape and i don't know how i'd feel if i— sort of shape and i don't know how i'd feel if i wasn't in shape. i i'd feel if i wasn't in shape. remember i'd feel if i wasn't in shape. i remember pre—love i'd feel if i wasn't in shape. i remember pre—love island, i watched all the seasons before and everyone in there is in mad nick. it’s all the seasons before and everyone in there is in mad nick.— in there is in mad nick. it's all about that- — in there is in mad nick. it's all about that. you _ in there is in mad nick. it's all about that. you look- in there is in mad nick. it's all about that. you look at - in there is in mad nick. it's all about that. you look at them l in there is in mad nick. it's all. about that. you look at them and in there is in mad nick. it's all- about that. you look at them and you think ou about that. you look at them and you think you lot — about that. you look at them and you think you lot are _ about that. you look at them and you think you lot are all _ about that. you look at them and you think you lot are all the _ about that. you look at them and you think you lot are all the kind - about that. you look at them and you think you lot are all the kind of-

think you lot are all the kind of people i follow on instagram, those fitness people that you will never get close to and suddenly you are like, josh, are you going on? i'm like, josh, are you going on? i'm like somebody who is never so far out of shape but i don't walk around with a six pack normally. i've got a decent shape to me but i lived in the gym. decent shape to me but i lived in the . m. ., ., decent shape to me but i lived in the . m, ., ., , ., decent shape to me but i lived in the gym-_ for i decent shape to me but i lived in i the gym._ for love the gym. for love island? for love island. the gym. for love island? for love lsland- l'm — the gym. for love island? for love island. i'm thinking _ the gym. for love island? for love island. i'm thinking i've _ the gym. for love island? for love island. i'm thinking i've got - the gym. for love island? for love island. i'm thinking i've got to - the gym. for love island? for love island. i'm thinking i've got to be i island. i'm thinking i've got to be on tv, it is bad enough going on holiday, used to treat going on holiday, used to treat going on holiday like a six week training camp. when i was on love island, i thought, i got six weeks before i go and and looked in the mirror and looking back i was in mad nick, i looked shredded but i looked at myself and thought i didn't want to go on. they didn't say to me explicitly you have to look like this and got to do that.- explicitly you have to look like this and got to do that. there is an expectation? _ this and got to do that. there is an expectation? of _ this and got to do that. there is an expectation? of course _ this and got to do that. there is an expectation? of course there - this and got to do that. there is an expectation? of course there is - this and got to do that. there is an expectation? of course there is an | expectation? of course there is an expectation- _ expectation. you are on this show, trying to be natural, trying to be the best version of you and you are worried about what people think. you are being broadcast to the nation. for the 1000 nice comments that you get,

you seem to remember the —10. do the 1000 nice comments that you get, you seem to remember the -10. do you think that has — you seem to remember the -10. do you think that has created _ you seem to remember the -10. do you think that has created an _ you seem to remember the -10. do you think that has created an image - you seem to remember the -10. do you think that has created an image of- think that has created an image of masculinity?— think that has created an image of masculini ? . , , ., , ':: ::f masculinity? reality tv shows. 100%. i didn't masculinity? reality tv shows. 10096. i didn't watch — masculinity? reality tv shows. 10096. i didn't watch them _ masculinity? reality tv shows. 10096. i didn't watch them that _ masculinity? reality tv shows. 10096. i didn't watch them that much - masculinity? reality tv shows. 10096. i didn't watch them that much but - i didn't watch them that much but even when i watched them i thought i don't have many abs. the image of our influence is, do they impact the way we see ourselves?— way we see ourselves? 10096. especially — way we see ourselves? 10096. especially feeding _ way we see ourselves? 10096. especially feeding back - way we see ourselves? 10096. especially feeding back into i way we see ourselves? 10096. i especially feeding back into pride and ego— especially feeding back into pride and ego as males, you don't want to be the _ and ego as males, you don't want to be the small, skinny or fat male, you know— be the small, skinny or fat male, you know what i'm saying? what should be expected _ you know what i'm saying? what should be expected of _ you know what i'm saying? twist should be expected of men? you know what i'm saying? what should be expected of men? we | you know what i'm saying? what - should be expected of men? we should be exected should be expected of men? we should be expected to — should be expected of men? we should be expected to just _ should be expected of men? we should be expected to just be _ should be expected of men? we should be expected to just be a _ should be expected of men? we should be expected to just be a bit _ should be expected of men? we should be expected to just be a bit more - be expected tojust be a bit more open _ be expected tojust be a bit more open and — be expected tojust be a bit more open and free with our emotions and not be _ open and free with our emotions and not be as— open and free with our emotions and not be as afraid, or feel that being in touch— not be as afraid, or feel that being in touch with your emotions is emasculating. you said you were angry— emasculating. you said you were angry back— emasculating. you said you were angry back in the day and all the rest of— angry back in the day and all the

rest of it — angry back in the day and all the rest of it. you probably have so many _ rest of it. you probably have so many people, especially males that may be _ many people, especially males that may be involved in violence or fighting. — may be involved in violence or fighting, and may have issues going on and _ fighting, and may have issues going on and it's— fighting, and may have issues going on and it's probably because they can't _ on and it's probably because they can't express themselves. they might be in a _ can't express themselves. they might be in a situation where there are down _ be in a situation where there are down and — be in a situation where there are down and depressed. back in the day when _ down and depressed. back in the day when i _ down and depressed. back in the day when i was _ down and depressed. back in the day when i was younger and i used to roll around — when i was younger and i used to roll around in my area with a couple of my— roll around in my area with a couple of my friends and things were not going _ of my friends and things were not going great, i was listening to gigs every— going great, i was listening to gigs every day— going great, i was listening to gigs every day on my stereo and i'd be in this mindset — every day on my stereo and i'd be in this mindset and everyone in the car in the _ this mindset and everyone in the car in the same — this mindset and everyone in the car in the same mindset, none of us have money— in the same mindset, none of us have money and _ in the same mindset, none of us have money and we are all kind of down, and then— money and we are all kind of down, and then you — money and we are all kind of down, and then you are on this bad path where _ and then you are on this bad path where anything can happen at any time and — where anything can happen at any time and that's only because we are hurting _ time and that's only because we are hurting within ourselves. it is time and that's only because we are hurting within ourselves.— hurting within ourselves. it is the kind of one _ hurting within ourselves. it is the kind of one acceptable _ hurting within ourselves. it is the kind of one acceptable emotion i hurting within ourselves. it is the | kind of one acceptable emotion of angen kind of one acceptable emotion of men ~ , ., . kind of one acceptable emotion of men ~ . . ., kind of one acceptable emotion of men ~ i. . . ., . kind of one acceptable emotion of men ~ . . ., . . anger. when you are around that and it is all you — anger. when you are around that and it is all you have _ anger. when you are around that and it is all you have ever _ anger. when you are around that and it is all you have ever known - anger. when you are around that and it is all you have ever known and - it is all you have ever known and you have — it is all you have ever known and you have grown _ it is all you have ever known and you have grown up _ it is all you have ever known and you have grown up being - it is all you have ever known and you have grown up being around| it is all you have ever known and i you have grown up being around it you have grown up being around it you tend _ you have grown up being around it you tend to — you have grown up being around it you tend to follow— you have grown up being around it you tend to follow it. _ you have grown up being around it you tend to follow it. especially. you tend to follow it. especially when _ you tend to follow it. especially when i — you tend to follow it. especially when i left _ you tend to follow it. especially when i left football, _ you tend to follow it. especially when i left football, those - you tend to follow it. especiallyj when i left football, those were you tend to follow it. especially- when i left football, those were my friends _ when i left football, those were my friends so — when i left football, those were my friends. so those _ when i left football, those were my friends. so those were _ when i left football, those were my friends. so those were the - when i left football, those were my friends. so those were the only- friends. so those were the only people — friends. so those were the only people i— friends. so those were the only people i could _ friends. so those were the only people i could look— friends. so those were the only people i could look to- friends. so those were the only people i could look to and - friends. so those were the only people i could look to and be . friends. so those were the only. people i could look to and be like, yo, people i could look to and be like, yo. what— people i could look to and be like, yo. what are — people i could look to and be like, yo. what are you _ people i could look to and be like, yo, what are you lot _ people i could look to and be like, yo, what are you lot doing - people i could look to and be like, yo, what are you lot doing today? j yo, what are you lot doing today? what _ yo, what are you lot doing today? what are — yo, what are you lot doing today? what are we — yo, what are you lot doing today? what are we doing _ yo, what are you lot doing today? what are we doing today? - yo, what are you lot doing today? what are we doing today? i'd - yo, what are you lot doing today? | what are we doing today? i'd gone from _ what are we doing today? i'd gone from training — what are we doing today? i'd gone from training every— what are we doing today? i'd gone from training every day—

what are we doing today? i'd gone from training every day waking - what are we doing today? i'd gone from training every day waking up, eat, from training every day waking up, eat. sleep. — from training every day waking up, eat, sleep, football, _ from training every day waking up, eat, sleep, football, eat, - from training every day waking up, eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, . eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football. — eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football. to— eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football, tojust _ eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football, to just chilling - eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football, tojust chilling on- eat, sleep, football, eat, sleep, football, to just chilling on the i football, tojust chilling on the block — football, tojust chilling on the block not— football, tojust chilling on the block. not so _ football, tojust chilling on the block. not so much _ football, tojust chilling on the block. not so much causing i football, to just chilling on the i block. not so much causing trouble butiust_ block. not so much causing trouble but just being — block. not so much causing trouble butiust being in _ block. not so much causing trouble butjust being in places— block. not so much causing trouble butjust being in places and - butjust being in places and situations_ butjust being in places and situations i— butjust being in places and situations i shouldn't - butjust being in places and situations i shouldn't havel butjust being in places and - situations i shouldn't have been in. you know? — situations i shouldn't have been in. you know? i— situations i shouldn't have been in. you know? i think— situations i shouldn't have been in. you know? i think expectation - situations i shouldn't have been in. you know? i think expectation for i situations i shouldn't have been in. . you know? i think expectation for me now as _ you know? i think expectation for me now as a _ you know? i think expectation for me now as a man— you know? i think expectation for me nowas a man is— you know? i think expectation for me now as a man is to _ you know? i think expectation for me now as a man is to first _ you know? i think expectation for me now as a man is to first of— you know? i think expectation for me now as a man is to first of all- you know? i think expectation for me now as a man is to first of alljust - now as a man is to first of alljust be happy— now as a man is to first of alljust be happy and _ now as a man is to first of alljust be happyand make— now as a man is to first of alljust be happy and make sure - now as a man is to first of alljust be happy and make sure your- be happy and make sure your household _ be happy and make sure your household is _ be happy and make sure your household is happy. - be happy and make sure your household is happy. be - be happy and make sure your household is happy. be this i be happy and make sure your- household is happy. be this happy person— household is happy. be this happy person for— household is happy. be this happy person for real _ household is happy. be this happy person for real and _ household is happy. be this happy person for real and not _ household is happy. be this happy person for real and not being - household is happy. be this happy person for real and not being so. person for real and not being so bitter— person for real and not being so bitter and — person for real and not being so bitter and not— person for real and not being so bitter and not being _ person for real and not being so bitter and not being so - person for real and not being so bitter and not being so sad - person for real and not being so bitter and not being so sad and| person for real and not being so. bitter and not being so sad and not being _ bitter and not being so sad and not being so— bitter and not being so sad and not being so angry _ bitter and not being so sad and not being so angry its— bitter and not being so sad and not being so angry. it's the _ bitter and not being so sad and not being so angry. it's the hardest - being so angry. it's the hardest thing — being so angry. it's the hardest thing but— being so angry. it's the hardest thing but i_ being so angry. it's the hardest thing. but i think— being so angry. it's the hardest thing. but i think if— being so angry. it's the hardest thing. but i think ifl_ being so angry. it's the hardest thing. but i think if i carry- being so angry. it's the hardest thing. but i think if i carry on. thing. but i think if i carry on that— thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset _ thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset and _ thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset and if - thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset and if i - thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset and if i carry. thing. but i think if i carry on that mindset and if i carry on thing. but i think if i carry on- that mindset and if i carry on that expectation — that mindset and if i carry on that expectation of _ that mindset and if i carry on that expectation of myself _ that mindset and if i carry on that expectation of myselfjust - that mindset and if i carry on that expectation of myselfjust to - that mindset and if i carry on that expectation of myselfjust to be l expectation of myselfjust to be happy_ expectation of myselfjust to be happy and — expectation of myselfjust to be happyand ntake— expectation of myselfjust to be happy and make sure _ expectation of myselfjust to be | happy and make sure everybody expectation of myselfjust to be - happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, _ happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, then — happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, then i _ happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, then i think— happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, then i think that's - happy and make sure everybody around me is happy, then i think that's the - me is happy, then i think that's the only expectation _ me is happy, then i think that's the only expectation you _ me is happy, then i think that's the only expectation you need. - me is happy, then i think that's the only expectation you need. [- me is happy, then i think that's the only expectation you need. [will- only expectation you need. i will freely speak— only expectation you need. i will freely speak about _ only expectation you need. i will freely speak about my _ only expectation you need. freely speak about my mental only expectation you need.“ freely speak about my mental health to anybody. i'vejust freely speak about my mental health to anybody. i've just met you and we were talking through there, telling you about stuff i've done and things like that. if it helps somebody then i don't really care. you know what i mean? if summary thinks that what i've been through this kind of

selfish and that i don't care because, as i say, it doesn't matter to me but people shouldn't be made to me but people shouldn't be made to feel they should be all masculine and hide their emotions. look at the stats, look at what's happening, because people can't speak about things. hello there. it is still cloudy and damp across south—eastern parts of england but the rain and drizzle should move away and eventually it

will brighten up later today. elsewhere, we will find more sunshine coming through triggering a few more showers, some of them heavy and thundery, particularly across parts of wales and northern england but more showers are breaking out in scotland and there could be one or two in northern ireland. highest temperature today will be around the glasgow area around 23 degrees away from those showers. still some heavy ones around into the evening, gradually tending to fade away and for many places it does become dry overnight. a lot of cloud, as you can see command that will be quite low cloud so it will be quite misty by the morning. temperatures typically down to ii or 12 degrees. tomorrow it should brighten up in many places again. some sunshine coming through, but again we have the risk of some heavy showers, more especially across northern england, scotland and northern ireland. for wales and the south—west of the cloud will thicken in the afternoon, could be some patchy rain, cooler than today. towards parts of the midlands, east anglia and south—east, a dry and bright today with some sunshine so temperatures will be a bit higher.

good afternoon. i am ben brown. this is bbc news with the latest headlines: england complete their final training session and will head south ahead of the clash tomorrow at wembley against italy in the final of euro 2020. england captain harry kane wants to win it for supporters. yeah, i know they'll all be there cheering us on around the country and we just can't wait to, hopefully, yeah, try and win the game for them. the build—up has reached fever pitch — tens of millions of football fans will be managing their nerves, ahead of kick—off tomorrow night. italy are unbeaten after 33 matches, so expectations are sky—high there too, with fans hoping their team can bring home their second euros trophy. fully vaccinated nhs staff could be let off having to self—isolate

after contact with someone with covid to try to