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by those graphic techniques. but already the theme of such a twenty-second year it has become. uh, fashion illustration. get acquainted with the belarusian traditions, rituals of the tradition to sprinkle the young with god maya with a prolonged and satisfied. vidovochny sans gave birth, speaks of a share. the new family was happy and zhilina lock. watch cultural projects on belarus 24 tv channel. the weekend is the time to escape from the worries of everyday work and dedicate them to travel . that's all there is. here in belarus it

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you may have noticed that in families where there are drinking people, the same situations are constantly repeated. here is a performance with the same roles with the loud name of an alcoholic. why it happens? and is it possible to get out of this vicious circle with this we will try to figure it out today? hello i lived in the hallway for 2 months. these are the masks that we can easily put on at one moment at another moment. we can take them off. i really can't say no sometimes. and i ca n't say that i do it unconsciously in this system. yes, you played an alcoholic in this scenario. you also have a certain role to suffer. i because at this moment take care of me. well, yes, i'm dirty, yes, i stink. well, i’m sitting here, i’m not bothering anyone , when i don’t understand what is happening, then others are to blame for all my states programs. today is a social game alcoholic.

our guest is expert master of psychology , a person who knows exactly the answers to many questions, because katerina gaykova specializes in just such problems. katya hello, the second one, it seems that in this program everyone plays some kind of social role associated with alcoholism. is this really how it happens sometimes? the feeling that we are all tied to some pre-written script. an interesting question, because if we consider it this way, then in general, social we all play some roles and not only there, but scenarios related to alcohol. yes, that is, we are now also playing a certain role. we are so in this studio. yes, and we are at work, for example, well, if you take me, there i am a psychotherapist or a psychologist there, i sit with clients in the same position. here i am trying to move the

alcohol roller. yes, that is, with a smart look, i answer some questions at home. i am a mother. yes, but these are all, uh, social roles that are healthy, let's say. so. these are the masks that uh we're in one moment, we can calmly dress at another moment. we can take them off, and there are masks that grow on us and sooner, but the problem is. it consists in the fact that, mm, there is still some secondary benefit, that is, a person gets used to it so much that he already lives only in this, boils only in this, then it turns out such a hmm running in a vicious circle, yes, from which those people. who are involved in this performance can not escape. and this theory is one of the theories of the view on alcoholism. yes, transactional analysis burn once developed it and, uh, in particular, one from games - this is called an alcoholic and there, and there is a certain number of roles, that is, in addition to an alcoholic. there are four more roles. wait, wait, i just wanted to interrupt you to keep the intrigue and find out what

ordinary passers-by of the city of minsk think about this, how they imagine this social game of an alcoholic for themselves. let's see it will be the main alcoholic. the one who drinks the rescuer is the one who will want him there to help him somehow and that's it. i've never heard of such a game - victim, for example, yes, that is there is an aggressor. well, i don't know. on it, as it were, two types either over there, uh, they should be pitied. either they themselves act as tyrants there. well, here are their top 30 to be, but i don't even know. never thought about it. i thought alcoholism was some kind of negative lifestyle, i can’t even call it a game, but it starts small. but if this is not controlled in some way, then it will, of course, move to some other stages and cause, of course. oh yes, addiction. i am very negative i relate to this. although i myself used alcohol, but alcoholics for me is just

the last stage. i don't really understand, how can i start now? something for me they just don't like it. yes, firstly, it seems to me that belarusians do not really understand what kind of social game an alcoholic is, on the one hand, and on the other hand, they are somehow rather negatively disposed. e to people who experience a similar addiction, katerina , tell me all the same, what roles are there. well, yes, unfortunately, this negative is present, so it’s true, sometimes, uh, it's hard to start recovering even for an alcoholic, because there, uh, in the world everything is considered as a disease. we have it as promiscuity, rather, yes, but if we talk about games, then this direction is considered not as alcoholism, not as an alcoholic, not as a disease. and how about this social game and here uh, they said already more according to such a simplified condensed version, which burn's student cartman made. uh, for all addictions , this is where the victim is persecuted by the rescuers in this

surprisingly, so, in principle, it’s enough victim persecutors rescuers or here other persecutors rescuers yes, this is when already and if it concerns those roles that we began to talk about before interrogation, then this is the main role is an alcoholic. yes, that is the person as the protagonist of the protagonist. so the main character. here there must be a rescuer yes, who saves him. well, before that, there is still a pursuer, that is. someone should give him a scolding to scold him, ride there to evaluate and is priceless. yes, then he must cry somewhere and someone comes to him help. and this savior who will regret taking a sip. well, in the situation further it may be a doctor, it may be a psychologist. in general, it can be employees of a whole ryabtse, a center, yes, that is, these are the people who, well, how would he look for them in order to be rescued and further eric, uh, bern suggests. uh, such roles as instigators simpleton instigator this one

that went to drink with it. yes, there or that, maybe some such good friend who does n’t really get drunk himself, he doesn’t have this problems. well, he incites all the time. uh, your friend go out for a drink and and one more role - it's simple. this is the one that lends, for example, all the time it can be, by the way, sincere. pardon the souls. yes, but also, because he does not know how to build boundaries, he does not know how to say. no, again, he wants to be good in the eyes of the one who asks him for this money, and it can be a neighbor, a friend, anyone , this often comes out. mom, for example, if you already have a wife and family, the wife is like that, then the pursuers are the rescuer, and mom is like that a simpleton, who, well, how is it, son, well, you didn’t say about the fact that a wife can play two roles at once, they can really somehow intersect and flow one into another. or maybe, in general, there is an alcoholic as the main character, and all the other roles are performed by one person, and there is such a thing with him, maybe they all overflow these roles. but when else about let's say a little more later, maybe you'll already say. there it is clearly visible, when

the victim is the pursuer the rescuer yes already abridged version. but even then, maybe at first our husband came to us, she scolded him, yes, then here is mine. yes, thank you everything for tomorrow will save you. she gives him broths and drinks. uh, calls to work, solves problems for him, so that he doesn't get fired. well, then he encourages him, giving money for a, then he can give money, but more often it still happens so differently, but it can be all that. yes, the same , maybe we have today the main character a person who experienced one of the above roles for sure a person, who says that he is an alcoholic completely open and a person whose history we are extremely interested in knowing. what did it all start. i invite our main character valery to our studio, not a mirzhets photographer with twenty years of experience, he captured a wonderful moment in the lives of others, but he himself almost fell out of the frame, only a miracle helped the photographer valery return to the

lens of life and he is ready to share his story. hello valery hello you know, but i think you are very brave man, true, because to confess - it 's in my opinion. the hardest first step. especially given the way everyone else is reacting . yes, they somehow perceive it immediately negatively, as a rule, their stories. where did it all begin? it all started the way it all started. it all started, as usual, as in the cinema, it all started with some holidays, with some events, i don’t know, unfortunately, probably, any event is a solemn or mourning event. it is mandatory, usually present alcohol up to a point. it didn't give me any problems. that is, it was some kind of episodic libations. well , everyone drinks. well, yes, that is, there is some kind of

period, for example, training in an institution. yes , it was like a game. yes, that is certain. that is, we are there, as in the suvorov school, roughly speaking, yes, and for us it was like that, like a quest there, yes, or there at the academy, for example, that is, it is forbidden for this, maybe, yes, yes. well , of course, not immediately, but some time passed. i am i realized that i probably need to hem. here we have made such a decision in the family. first time when he screwed up. 20 must have been about five plus seven young man. well, it's well, it 's true, but in my opinion young, and who are we? we have made a decision. who are you family council? we made a decision that yes. alcohol is already starting to harm, that is, they told you they decided together. i realized that yes, and e

we went, er, to a medical clinic. i filed for 3 years. here's the money paid. hemmed and everything, as it were, would be wonderful. i realized that yes klass is all sensation. that is, they told me that if i drank alcohol, i , respectively, uh, or something would happen to me in terms of health, my legs would fail there, i would go blind there, psychological work. yes, or i will die like this, yes, and as much as i would not want to die. that's how i would not drink and did not drink. i'm about two and a half years old, and then suddenly, and then suddenly i thought, everything, this is nonsense, then suddenly. there were people who told me this is nonsense. you can do it yourself, in the sense of yourself you can't drink. so i say, well, how are we still the same six months left 2.5 passed.

now six months is nothing to worry about. will there be a continuation a little at first, that is, at first they drank a little, yes, and then i realized that, well, as it were, well, since i drank, nothing happened, what is it connected with? that's what kind of fearlessness, or at first they inspired a person that something will happen to you, and then some kind of toggle switch works. why is this happening? why are they breaking down again? well this i have, uh, the disease is alcoholism. yes, that is, if the person himself does not changes, nothing changes. well, if we look at an angle today. ah, the position of the victim, yes, in this situation. that is, he will repent of it does not come out. that is, there, in any case, we hear some kind of responsibility on the family. advice man. well, an adult. yes, i understand, i already decided, but not what i myself decided to decide - the family is still yes,

because it is in this, let's say a triangle or in this performance an alcoholic. and er next. that is, here we see a clear role of salvation. yes, it was a family further on, instigators appeared, who, well, everything is being investigated so act endlessly, until a person begins to change himself. yes, that is. well, i think that we will come to this today in the course of our conversation, how and in order for e to change in it, but until this scheme starts and will work. he will go from one breakdown to another to the third. that is, if there are no internal changes, then these disruptions will still occur. and i just have a very interesting question. it's times like these when you say, uh, well, let's encode, then we broke down, as you felt you were someone. or did you feel sorry for yourself? what happened to you all around, of course. yes. i'm a lazy wino, you're all to blame, of course, i want to say a little more about it. that

fear of death, right? what’s wrong, yes, and there, as it were, why do you drink, and there come periods when i talk to myself, and, as it were, talk to myself all the time. only i don’t know how it is with others, when you want to die, you can’t drink and you can’t not drink, and this is this state. but this permanent the hell you live in uh, the time of day doesn't matter the day of the week, meaning nothing exists at all. you're only looking for alcohol. and it doesn't matter what kind of alcohol. absolutely also not absolutely alcohol-containing liquids, yes, that is, absolutely any. that is, i had a pharmacy year, that is, i just sat at the pharmacy for a year, this is corvalol hawthorn valerian. there lamivite was still such a wonderful remedy, that is, because there was no money to take them to be , where i stood near there. well, or walked along

some there. locations where there are people and just shot a change in order to buy for 80 kopecks. a jar of valerian, and all the time i think why different people really ask me for a trifle arguing. yes, i need to lose my wallet for bread on the road, and i immediately see that it’s not for bread or on the road, i give it. sometimes if i see that with a person, a person in such a state is actually ill-prepared. and he, maybe, i remember from myself, he can easily die, but he can die, if you can die, i want to say a little, of course we have a show, yes. that is, it is somewhere a little lightness of some kind. yes, there is in the program, but in fact, any dependent person. um, well, initially there is some program on the destruction itself. yes, that is, that's why this is, of course, such a deep topic, this is an unconscious thing, but man, uh, by all

means. it doesn't matter what drugs, alcohol , overeating or programs simply kill friends, even our great writer william shakespeare also had an addiction to alcohol, and he died of a fever after another drinking bout with colleagues. and one would think that he wrote such a role for himself and is to blame. it’s just that he could n’t get off the hook of alcohol addiction in time, i hope that you can do it . if there is such a problem, do not switch. today we continue to analyze the scenarios of the adult game of an alcoholic for our conversation. another expert has joined. this is a consultant of the rehabilitation center for healthy youth. nadezhda filippova hello nadezhda. good afternoon. here you are as a person working with addicted people. sometimes i can be and always get involved

in this game called al. of course, you see, in general, helping professions, well, they provide for some involvement and, uh, i even do it willingly sometimes, but it’s just good when it happens consciously and at the level of some kind of empathy of interaction. sympathy at times it really happens, like salvation, and at times it is some kind of merging. i remember well that at the beginning of my journey. and i had strong kinks, because hmm well, again, i myself convalescent and it seemed to me that i could get, and approval love and relationships are some kind of interaction. only if i 'm good, that's, if i help save, in addition, there was some kind of element, you know, mm, some kind of omnipotence. it turned out that i urgently need to give back what i have acquired, that i can somehow directly force a person to do it. cause him welcome

that's but really. summer is not like that. well, of course, you know, but hmm, while i was growing up, in this counseling experience of mine. ah, uh, i've had a lot of personal disadvantage therapy. these things can influence it when you do not see yourself and do not understand. uh, lack of, uh experience. and now, i don't know, there 's some kind of professional competence. uh, hmm notions of their roles as a psychologist. yeah, lo and behold, well, maybe just some kind of low self-esteem flaw. a healthy relationship, when all this is normal, then, in principle, everything is fine. here you are, when you share all this, it helped here, it was supported here, it turned on often, maybe not only like a specialist, but just like a person, what you were talking about, feeling sympathy, and you do not feel some kind of exhaustion. but you give yourself to your emotions at work, then there is no feeling that listen in my opinion, i'm all.