then, after all, we have a parental fist, yes, there is such a thing. hope , probably, when, depending on, in fact, i can share my story too. that is, i am in the first education, teaching 20 geography biology, and in the second, the psychologist 100% influenced my mother on your questions, of course, my mother said. well, where will you go, except for the pedagogical university? you're not going anywhere , my mother said. well, it's a normal topic when the parents, as it were, we give you our choice, but still, as it were directing. i'm just the same, sharing my story. i chose the same one when i was choosing a university, perhaps i wanted a theatrical one, but i entered an engineer. listen. well, you are not engineers now, you still have a creative profession. so i did not become an economist and manager in the field of tourism. and, as it were, yes to my mother at will. this is what we have implemented. well, why was it necessary? nobody understands about this. how many disputes there were when the son decided to choose a creative profession , not understanding how much from the parents was? well, then i managed to convince you, it seems, dmitry, you are lucky here, your children do not yet put before you some important decisions of their own, when it is already necessary. take

some measures and exercise some parental control, but here's how dependent you are on your children. we invite you to find out right now by answering a few of our questions. yes, i'm asking for a little test. answer incognito. don't call the right answer, the right answers can't be yes or no, and our viewers answer in parallel with you at the end of the program. we will sum up, find out your result and find out the opinion of an expert on this matter, and you protect your child from any shocks and constantly regret it. afraid that the child will be offended or angry actively, the head of the child's education. control his interests. leave the child. better a piece of the pie, be very worried and worried about the child when you are not around. so friends for each positive answer, consider yourself a treat, then we will figure it out by the amount of points received if you have such an addiction, and now friends. i want to introduce you more one. e, a hero, or rather a heroine, she is a mother who honestly admitted that she was dependent on

her children. but where her story began, we will find out very soon. today we are talking about dependence on children, how deep our heroine from the dark room plunged into this issue, we will find out right now. the problem is that i myself am the daughter of an alcoholic and my husband is also the son of an alcoholic. that is, we both grew up in such a dysfunctional family, as i understood, later in our families of parents there were no healthy relationships, there was no such direct communication, that is, all communication was reduced only to manipulation. let's just say to some categorical demands, or to push through guilt in this way. well, that is, they tried, uh, and we, including raising our children. it must have been this desire to help save and protect your

dear beloved child, and well, a simple example when a son woke up to school. that is, even at this school age, yes, that is, he systematically overslept at school, and it was necessary to wake him up and control him. and if i was more tolerant of this, murd. he just called from work. he left work earlier for him, controlled that his son began to go to school. and the more we controlled him, the worse the situation was, uh, and everything ended up with the fact that until now, even when our son started with us, uh, my husband calls him , checks whether he got a job, that is, a person is 23 years old his family, but this is still, and this control does not allow a person to grow up, as i understand it, that is, he does not take responsibility, what is it? here is my responsibility. i must become school. that is, if i am late, there will be some kind of punishment. there is a reprimand at school. there is a diary entry or something else, and in this

case, when his parents will be very convenient. this is the responsibility to attach to the parents. that is. well, it's not me, it wasn't that they woke me up, for example, there or something else. well, here is my understanding. probably it was like that when we rescued, when we somehow solved the problems of children, where they could grow up and build some kind of foundation, right? i feel in myself faith in myself, including, because these are the manipulations that we very often used in the family, including myself. e, when we didn’t say directly what we want, when we indirectly hint somewhere that the person himself guessed that he felt guilty and did it. they are so powerless, and they grow up people so infantile and insecure in themselves, that this, of course, is very painful, and i did not immediately realize it. i supervised the lessons. i was in control. and where with whom when at what time should he come? i even then i had five for the sake of the children little less. i had a schedule all the time,

i didn’t mention there that we need someone to take us to some kind of circle, someone to pick someone up. in general, it was some kind of crazy plan, and i replaced it myself in this plan; i didn’t have to do everything perfectly , because yes, good is not enough. if i missed something there, if there are any problems, that's it. how bad i am, mom and my mother often pointed this out to me, and you lived with them for a very long time, that is, with dad and grandfather an alcoholic and with co-dependent mother, who controlled me in the same way, and it was important for me to please my mother and i’m ashamed to say, but even at the age of, probably, 42 years. in difficult situations, i called my mother and asked how to do it. that is, i took no responsibility for my life. even at this age, i called my mother and asked. how to do it? and so. well, like this, if there is something i would have felt bad there, but it 's my mother's fault. it was my mother who advised me there. you do not understand the decision, that is, to take responsibility. i just

i’m learning from your happiness myself, yes, that’s why the feeling of guilt is very such, probably one of the main feelings that i often experience. now i'm trying to keep track of my feelings. i'm seriously working on this because it's important for me to have a psychologist one day. he said that i’ll try to track during the day when you feel guilty, and it was a nightmare because the list was huge and he said, now choose from them somewhere was really to blame when you hurt someone damage. i understood, that this is not there, or there once a day. there really is someone a reason at all and in a way. i began to work with this feeling. well, well, it was really necessary to break this whole system in my head and treat children differently. dmitry you control your children whether you do homework with them, make sure that they get up there on time, especially when the second shift

begins at the child's school. it's generally difficult to understand when he was driving, when he woke up, fortunately, our child goes to the first shift. and what's interesting? she herself sets the alarm and gets up by herself. here. uh, for me. this very for the most very pleased. do we do lessons with her, but i ’ll say right away that she herself has lessons, but of course, she asks for help if she needs something, if she feels that she is sagging somewhere in some knowledge, but we have spouses, how would it be so for the rule not to intervene and not interfere with doing homework. if the kid thinks he can do it all, we give her the time to make them herself, so, well, it's hard for me to say we're in control. or maybe, of course, in some moments we control, because if i say now. no, nowhere, we do not control. i'm like this dad. uh, my wife is also like that and we are, but an ideal family. well, of course, i will be cunning at some

points, we certainly control where we do n’t notice it. but er, as a matter of fact, it is not for us any there. eh, you know, some formor in the family. and if you say, is there any breakdowns and psychological or not, but as in every family it happens, but we do not use this as a technique. yes to control their children pathologically, but, probably, we still don’t have it. and you know what i thought. i, too, once decided not to control the lessons of my child. you know how it ended. he graduated a quarter worst of all in the class, then i'm very cool here, which of course i, well, i think he 's an adult guy should do everything himself. it turned out that this did not lead to the best consequences, and anyway, then i had to sit down to prompt to help. but it happens so often in life, or is it just my personal the case when we let go of everything, they say. you are an adult. make your own decisions. and it doesn't matter. at what age is my son, 11, it turns out that the decision he takes the wrong ear. he wants to pierce something else there, he wants to kink himself.

well, maybe you still need to go side by side to tell him badly to let go of the situation worse than the norm, where is the pathology. here i am for now for me. i hope the expert will grow a point on this one, because i don’t understand yet, i’m ready to argue on this issue. yes, well i would say so, actually, well, up to a certain age, you really need to control here, that is, control what i mean to put in some certain framework, because as i remember, probably 10 or 15 years ago, when- then everyone said it is necessary to raise children in the japanese system. what kind of system in the japanese system is it all for them to allow, and then, as if someone wanted to bring up in japanese, they allowed you, someone answered you in the old fashioned way, and then after a while it turned out that the japanese the system is not what we understand, but it means. here's what, for example, if i want to stand still. i want their example to allow everything, yes, so for a small child in this way i will equip the room so that he doesn’t fit anywhere, he can’t climb wherever i don’t want to, yes, that is, for example, this is someone where, he he cannot be injured, where there are toys,

which, for example, he also cannot eat there, swallow something with him, put something in there. something there, too, with oneself to make such control, and in such a way, as if it has freedom correctly, but at the same time, we limit it to some circumstances defined there. this is the first and second. must be at a certain age, but i think at least there are up to 6 years before first grade. so just put some certain such barriers. er, that is, let's feel safe not to give him a choice. that is, until a certain age, the child cannot be given a choice. 'cause when we offer a three-year-old in the store, pick a cap that you like, yes, that is, we can get stuck there, firstly , for a long time, but this is not the worst thing, but the terrible thing is that a child of this age has not yet formed, the basic trust in the world has not yet formed enough. yes , it’s still there, for example, 3 years, when we already went hand in hand with me, or rather, he calmly went, but at the same time a psycho, you’re not strong, he develops anxiety, a feeling of anxiety in order to there was no anxiety. we are talking

to the child. this is what you wear. here is what you eat. here you go there, yes, a certain age, what? i'm interested too, look it up. you just gave the example of your eleven-year-old child. dmitry said that your daughter. how old is she, who taught herself? 11 she does her homework herself. from what age does she set her alarm clock? that is, it is perfect. well, it's like we're hearing different stories, right. because it's really all individual. someone develops the psyche faster. for someone there, it develops more slowly, but i can say for sure that when we overcome, when the child and we help to overcome the crisis, for example, three years. yes, when he went to kindergarten, he made some new friends. here the circle of communication has expanded, that is, we must look after all this, but in no case should we impose something of our own there, for example, there, he quarreled your son there in kindergarten, he had a fight with some boys, we immediately approach this t-shirt of cream. i protect everything there, that is, on the one hand, as if we were

talking to our child. look, i'm next to you, nothing, don't be afraid, on the other hand. if we continue to do the same in about the first grade, then in the end, he will be sure that his mother will always come and she will always protect him, and then in the eleventh grade. well, it's cold there too. yes, they are the same there, if we dali in the eye and says, you offended my boy there, yes, that is, i think that approximately, when he overcomes, this is the crisis, he goes to school, and then in fact, it’s not without reason that it was invented that the child is there on his own. well, in my opinion, it's second class to drive children on their own, they are not allowed to go there, but from the second, in my opinion, it is already possible, yes, there everyone can do some really yes, that is, in the first grade, even here, as it were, how it is formed in our society in the first grade . he can’t go home, yes, and yet this is due to the fact that there are some statistics. how does the child's psyche develop there after the second grade. really. he can take his backpack to go and when the parents control what happens to the parents is actually alarming. yes, that is what we do we think we are we make a child better when, for example, we

take away his schools. we help carry the backpack in this, in fact, if such a parent is asked questions, why is he doing this at all. and if you dig into it, then he relieves his anxiety, yes, that is, everything is scary for him, if we ask the child, i am more than sure that half of the children in the first grade will say, i will go myself. we all go, i will go the right way, that is, in this case, as if co-dependence with the child, the parent. this parent is a person who has a very complete many people have a lot of their anxiety, and he, as it were, outweighs the child and thinks he is uncomfortable, in fact, you need to ask the child a question, are you uncomfortable? dmitry, it would be interesting to know, but this example, which you are now broadcasting to your children, independence, perhaps, to make your choice. and your support for your children is you. the parents were so supportive too. here they are, the root lies precisely there in your family. maybe you, too, left the alarm clock for yourself were excellent students. should not have to control. well, i would probably say that what is happening now is raising my children, how i am raising them, most likely, compensation for what i did not receive.

i'm in my family, please. yes, because as in my family, but hmm with my parents, and i didn’t set an alarm clock for myself. i put all the responsibility on my parents. and i felt so comfortable. ah, the lessons, of course, i liked to do one lesson, but it's so relatively speaking, i loved it, i didn't quite do it. yes, and there was a raven counting, and in writing poetry. uh, all kinds of toys there played, since there were no phones then. we didn’t do this, but there were a lot of other games, and, in the end, when the parents. well, let's check the lessons with me. uh hours, there are six in the evening, the lessons are not completed. yes, i did not like to do them in fact . and i was very glad when they left me even more glad when they did not check, they probably thought so that but

we will transfer all the responsibility. e your son. that is, yes to me, and now i'll take it by the head, as many parents believe and will child do it yourself. well, nothing like such a warehouse. uh, i have such a character, i have such a temperament, and i did not like to do this no. yes, you say, i didn’t like my parents, that is, it’s wonderful, probably, they grew up in the soviet past, yes, and my parents had such a soviet upbringing. all right, hands up. that's how at what moment you realized that i don't want it to be like this with my children, i want to trust the cards like this and tell what dmitry does and why he relates to raising his children with a head. reveal cards. yes, i have been in the first education for a long time. i am a techie, and according to the second i am a techie psychologist, my parents suggested a profession, of course, for 15 years. i

gave my work to the mining industry, and at some point i realized that, but i somehow burn out at this job. she becomes less interesting to me, not in such a way that it is generally uninteresting in psychology , i became the most interesting. moreover, i met my current wife. she is also a psychologist and an astrologer and i love her very much. a and uh, you know we're together, i can't say that i one. but i decided that and so, i will communicate with the children. well, somehow together they informed olesya and i decided that, well, in general, it’s somehow important that the child e. such is the hope, probably, but such a technique will also agree, a choice without a choice. yes, that is, here we are. strictly speaking, semolina or barley. and don't remember. uh, here, uh, the golden key, where

the fox pinocchio says so i still hide my five soldiers somewhere, but hide it right there in this one. well, what are you about the same thing, so that the child, uh, thought that on indeed, he made the choice. well , of course, we are still a wife, but somehow we create security, because we are children. they actually play. they do not always, but understand where the risk factors are. the fear factor, but we still make sure that children choose a safe pattern of behavior for themselves, by the way, friends, here's what you know about guardianship of excessive control over children, and british scientists have proven , namely that, according to such indicators as initiative, resourcefulness from and a tendency to non-traditional the decisions of those whose children were not limited by excessive supervision in childhood are several times ahead of children, the games that, uh, were regulated by adults, we, please, hyper-guardianship, turns out to be bad,

because the child does not feel his strength in making decisions, this is exactly what happened with the children our heroine, who is in a dark room, about the continuation of her story very soon. sti, we are talking from children, today we are in our program and we continue to learn the story of the heroine from the dark room, who realized her problem, and how she her began to struggle loans. that is, that this is a function of it exactly right, as if copied under a blueprint. it could have been credit addiction. he was an alcoholic to me, but he arranged centralized suicides, played with me in some way for some money and to pay off his loans. he said that was the whole point. i do it for the family. the children were screaming, mom would do something. listen to him and

my soul was torn, because i understood that on the one hand. he really can do something. and i succumbed to it here these provocations. i was paying off some of his debts and at the same time i was terrified because five children needed to raise them. you need to provide them somehow and money. no. i went to two or three jobs to somehow make ends meet. but this didn’t solve the problem, and then by some miracle, i got into the group there for four years already, and now in the process, when i was there in this group and my problems with adult children began and , of course, processing works, but there is a result. and i am very glad that some there are changes here, the first such is a bright moment of their dependence. i noticed with my eldest son when i organized his wedding. and they were against the girl. i really

liked it, girl, everything was not bad, but for some reason i read that this is my function of the organization. why is it so on fire? i wanted to decorate this dining room myself. yes there to choose these dishes. that is, for some reason, even then i didn’t realize that it was none of my business at all, and i got angry when i called him and asked, what color will we do? yes, there are weddings, that is, what color, a what kind of cake to order there? what kind of music what competitions are they? well, we still do it whatever you want, i was really offended and not a little. how is it so for some reason, they do not help me so much. that is, i try to do it for them. they do not appreciate them, my work. here, and they didn’t need more about it at all. they didn't want power with you and your second son. well , since this is a dysfunction, it, unfortunately, is inherited, and my youngest son drinks. and when he drinks, he has some period of inadequate

behavior, when his wife was pregnant, he arranged some kind of suicide, too, he could take place. he was completely drunk. at some stop, he cut his veins. and he bled. i don't know where he found strength and how he called his father. uh, well, he came and took him, barely alive, just. well, and here he is calling me the most. well, what is screaming in panic, it's all because of you. now, if you talked to the bride, you would decide everything. well, all the questions it wouldn't be, but now he says, i don't know where to take him, because if i took him to the hospital, then uh, well it's dangerous for him. it won't take him anywhere. she works. it's like they say in the people, a yellow ticket. that is, i am not aware of all these issues. he says i'll bring you. and you sew up thought you're a doctor. you must sew. if it's my own fault, i'll bring it to you. here he brings me this son.

thank god that he cut his hand in the wrong place, but he is very strong. there really needed to be sewn up, and i was in shock. i didn't know what to do. he was barely alive. he is so pale. under alcohol and i was very it was scary, and i didn’t know what to do; the only thing i remembered was this prayer, which is in all step groups. uh, expect no reason and peace of mind to accept what i am powerless to change courage to change what is on the head and wisdom to distinguish one another. the son did not go to the doctor. he slept off and came to his senses. i just bandaged him, processed this early , scored it, and said that it was very dangerous early, huge by some miracle. it dragged on, because young organisms, because i don’t know why, it must have been so whatever. and he got it all. this is

a pensioner, as it were. i am not a parent yet. your daughter has already become independent at the age of 11. yes, it will develop. like you said to make your own decisions, and at some point you want to give her advice, she will say, dad, you know that i actually make my own decisions since i was 11, so i'm yours. your advice is not needed at all, don’t be afraid, that’s it no, i’m not afraid, because she asks for advice, she comes up and asks when she is interested in something else the thing is, when we really control the child and, as you know, with these tips, we put on a backpack with unnecessary stones, these tips are not needed. and in order for a child, in fact, to come and consult with something, it is very important to give him the opportunity to find responsibility. e for his actions or inaction, then he will fit. parents are already interested in this, then the parents get their significance or

the child understands that he is needed therefore, well, if you say, you are afraid or not, no , i’m not afraid of all this, because we have one child and the second third and fourth on the fourth still small he had everything else. you have a professional education, but people who really control their children and sometimes it becomes a real problem. they do not dare to turn to a specialist or consider that it is very expensive. everyone has their own reasons, but there are questions on the social network and we have prepared a hopeful list of such questions for you. here is a question such parents of my girlfriend call her continuously and demand to return home when she stays until 11:00 pm my girlfriend is 22. she is already adult, how to explain it to them? so well, here we see, really again a third person. yes, that is, the young man cares about the girl, does not seem to care about the girl is similar. well , i don't know what the context is. yes, but if a young man addresses, then it worries him, and the girls may like the fact that her parents are calling, i'm worried, they and so on advised the young man to

understand first of all, that's all, what he feels and why he needs it at all what hinders him with these calls, after all. they don't call him right. that is, what happens to him is his what need is not satisfied, move on, i have teenagers here. i help them with home buildings and introduce them to different circles. they tell me that i care too much about them, but i don't understand what's wrong with that, what's the harm. well actually, i don't know how old the kids are. maybe there are children going to the second grade as teenagers - what age is that? well, rather, homework circles are teenagers, they talk about teenagers. yes , teenagers yes, but teenagers, yes, that is, she teenagers are included in circles, yes, that is, we can talk to this strange, yes, at 12 years old. she takes and winds up the handle in the mug. yes, that is, again, in fact, i would honestly feel sorry for teenagers, because i myself have an eleven-year-old son and when, for example, we are walking with him now. at least there to the store or somewhere else. he says get away from me. i say why she tells me

ashamed. actually, the kid here with my mother is walking by the hand, don’t even get closer at school, for example, if i’m already there in the second grade took away, and as if out of habit you kiss the child. when you see, he says, get away, shame me, mother, don’t shame me, that is, therefore, i really don’t know how these teenagers feel, but i focus, for example, on my child, probably, they should also be comfortable here. at least, but for some reason they don’t tell her about it and fanta further, which means, probably, there, as it were, really and in some kind of emotional problem. well, there are some difficulties in the sphere, that is, they, probably, cannot also talk about that they feel something there, or maybe feelings already repressed to such an extent that they don’t really feel, well, that is what this woman does, really. she doesn't give to her children. well, face frustration. and especially since it's adolescence behind him already. as a matter of fact, i finish school and then continue my adult life at the university. no one, of course, babysits us, but here i would say that this is a very unhealthy situation, because

in adolescence you have to take care of children. but this is, well, agree. it's weird, totally agree, the next story is even more run down. eh, but i even if a personal example, and i'm studying at the institute in minsk, i entered last year. they gave me a hostel, and it seems that i should be happy, but my mother moved in after me, she rented an apartment for me far away and controls my every step. it's horrible. she even left him with his dad because he, well, didn't want to move. what should i do? well, what should i do? here's this here's how to quickly convey to mom that mom, i'm already an adult. and you go to dad. live there, by the way, you know, i will start, what should i do? uh-huh personally, i would well, that's through my experience. i would have found in this resource, actually today. i think it's so cool when mom cooks food there , because there is not enough time. yes , and maybe, i’ll also say now, it’s very ugly, but in principle, in this case, can i use my mother a little right? that is, let mom hang the curtains there , do something else, and i'll go and eat, apparently . yes, that is, here, as it were, really in this situation. i see a resource. well, as far as e is really pathological, not

pathological. and in general, where is mom here, then in this case, dmitry. i think you will agree with me. surely you work with such situations. here it’s worth asking mom what she will do when she’s a daughter, for example, she comes to another city, what will remain with her mother, if she has a relationship with her dad, if she has any kind of work there, her hobby, her classes. that is, as i understand it, my mother has a life to such an extent focused on the child. what, she even forgot that she had a husband. that is, this mother is absolutely not busy with anything in her life, except for the child, and i can say that there really will be. mom has a lot of anxiety when they disperse if, of course, they ever disperse, but then help is needed. of course, mom definitely needs my son. my son had several major conflicts at school. of course, i am always on his side, and he is my child. i'm starting to clear things up. i call the cool parents of another child. my husband and i fight over this. because he thinks i shouldn't interfere. but i'm a mother, as i like the word. i'm a mother. and who, like me,

will protect my child. it is also important to understand the context of what and when happens at school, because after all, in my opinion. i believe that even in the eleventh grade , situations can occur that, without the participation of parents, still cannot be sorted out and cleared up. unless, of course, she runs after every time. something there finds out, then so again. she does not give the child. you just don't have to train him the ability to resolve conflicts on his own. as a rule, such people, when they grow up, either a constant feeling of guilt, or most often they can be ridden, because they do not know how to give back. so either they ca n’t then form their social circle, because how would they get used to that, well, they are always in comfort, yes, and here, for example, someone runs into them there , says some unpleasant things to them, and from them with penza their backs. mom, there is no shouting, no barking, the situation is unpleasant for them, it is easier for them to break contact altogether. the further you participate in this. that is, here the task of the mother, well, somehow contain their emotions in general. and don't go near the child. if indeed the child is

able to resolve this conflict not every time. i would say that in fact, initially here, as if, if you return, in general, to our finished to our meeting. i wanted to say everything, but there was no moment that there really should be a dialogue between the parent and the child, and this is being formed. it is possible , for example, to form when the child goes to first grade and correctly when the child came from school to ask him what was there, who was sitting with whom, that is, to be interested in order for the child. what do parents know about? what environment is he in and when from early childhood, for example, a child comes home quite calmly and tells his mother something happened to me, such and such, and mom, for example, says oh there, i understand you, there , really such a difficult situation, in short, joins his emotions. they say, and i told you, don’t get in or something else, yes, that is, it doesn’t shut up the child, doesn’t interrupt him and then the dialogue continues. this is when the transitional age comes, the child quite calmly comes to his mother and tells her everything, then, firstly, the mother’s anxiety is removed. this is what i've been saying for so long to this answer to the question. that is, since the mother

flies to school, she really does not know with whom the child is studying. what kind of children are around him? who is aggressive, who is kind, who can take his side? can the class teacher influence the situation? that is, for me it's about the fact that my mother does not understand what happened only with my mother, the dialogue is necessary bring or with dad too. you just talk so often in the transfer of mom mom to mom, only mom says a lot of responsibility. it seems to me, for example, if theoretical. again take yes, then all the same. well, of course, if this is a full-fledged family, then both take part there somehow, but in general, it’s correct that starting from the age of seven, the child is identified with the parent of the same gender, yes, that is, if it’s a boy, then, of course it is important for dad to endlessly be around and demonstrate paternal male behavior, but it is still better for girls to pay attention to their mother and become a mother, because, in fact, they are in a normal, full-fledged harmonious family. that's about the age the child comes after kindergarten and the mother of the boy. especially. as a matter of fact, it is not needed, because it was needed as attendants. after

all this, he already comes into play, dad and dad there says how to hammer a nail in there. and that there is something there to do like a man and so on. that is, it is about your questions. for some reason mom why not dad huh? dad, do you agree with this? do i agree with you unequivocally. so i find myself listening to you and i think, if i needed a wife, i would need a family psychologist. i would turn to you for help, turn to the family psychologist natalya vodianova for help, a well-known model, but she is still a mother, for example, she forbids her children to cry, crying is possible only if they have experienced some kind of physical pain. well, for example, hit, but expresses his emotions. there, screaming scandals, crying in the family, the absolute taboo it is forbidden and than the merman argues that they say that you have the opportunity to do anything at all , but the family is wealthy. you can travel. you may want something. you can achieve this, so please, don’t put pressure on us and somehow manipulate us with the help of your tears, so crying in the merman’s

family is such a family rule that mom forbade. yes, but whether the heroines who are in the dark room controlled the tears of their children, we will find out very soon. today we are talking about dependence on children. did it succeed our heroine from the dark room to cope with this problem, we find out right now some kind of reassessment was happening, probably in my head, because i had an illusion that i had an ideal family. i have a family that believes. and when i came to the temple and the children there sang in the choir. i stood there and i was in tears. i thought i had such a wonderful family. well, at the same time , there was some kind of incomprehensible feeling inside, something bad, what was bad, i could not understand, and i began to look. i went uh hmm first at uh. the church is the school of family life, i went

through the theological college of theology, and during my studies there was a lot of christian psychology. she got me very interested. it was really such an important step for me, probably, a step where i comprehended a lot, realized i revised it, and i began to behave a little differently in the family, now i remembered the moment that at the stage of meetings with my wife. this was probably the first time i showed up at the border and was gone. here's how we say to import it there, yes, or somehow use it person. he came and demanded money from me for a trip to the village with his girlfriend. i did n't give it to him. how can you not give it to me? i 'm going to the village with my girlfriend. why don't you give me money? you for him it was just wildness, in general, somehow mom. the whole day and

then i did not explain why i simply did not give. and this, probably, was such a first stage when i wanted him to take responsibility for his life in his own hands. and here's what i wanted to say even more importantly, that these four years, when i, uh, more or less, already realized that i still have something here are two teenage girls, we can get divorced and we live in separate apartments attire. i see how i stayed with them, uh, to communicate in a different way, but these messages began. i ask how you want. i see how my girl becomes completely different. that is, they have completely changed their character for several years. it can be said that they have become more confident in themselves. i don't know what they want, they don't know what they want, they come to me with hugs. well , we have been in a relationship for many years and i am the maximum. tried to remove these