seem like it will pull back soon. >> karen? >> don't look a gift horse in the mouth. sell microsoft. >> gap same store sales tomorrow. i'm jim cramer and welcome to my world. >> you need to get in the game. he's going out of business and he's nuts! they know nothing! i like to say the bull market is -- "mad money." you can't afford to miss it! hey, i'm kramer. welcome to "mad money." people want to make friend, i'm trying to make you a little money. not to entertain, but to teach you and coach you. call me at 1-800-743-cnbc. bear markets! [ mooing ] they create problems. bull markets, they solve them.

bear markets, they sow seeds of worry. bull markets harvest those seeds and turn them into something worth chowing down on. bear markets frighten people out of stocks. bull markets let those who stay, those with fortitude, those who are implaquable enjoy the games after the "we cans" have left the table. the bear has objections. the bull, rebutts and trounces them. and you saw all of that today with the final breakout in the s&p 500. rally 1.22% to its all-time high of 1,587. the dow up 129 points and the nasdaq's fabulous 1.383% run. welcome back, apple. to understand the triumph of the bulls, you have to go back four short months ago to the perceived wisdom of the moment.

back then, there were five closely held, near and dear tenants to pretty much everyone i heard or talked to. first, the federal government, it was about to jump off a cliff. taxes would rise for 100% of the people in this nation. typically those in the middle class. dividends would be taxed at the very high, ordinary three times the current rate. second, the fed would raise interest rate, maybe dramatically, because they'd be worried about the inflation it was causing with its bond-buying program. that meant the tax rate return -- if that, the tax rate return would plummet. it would make them not much better than certificates of deposit, and people would sell, sell, sell. all of the dividend player, europe, after months of calm, was back on the red-hot, sizzling griddle! you know what that meant? italian bonds, spanish bonds, a

litany of banks about to have runs. or the debt ceiling was going to rerail our for certain. the sequester lurked ominously. no matter what deal the politicians made, these would, of course, throw us off track and cause much higher unemployment. [ baby crying ] finally, four months ago, fourth-quarter earnings, the reports were around the corner, and they were supposed to be, yes, nothing to write home about. [ beeping ] or maybe worse, with the typical worldwide slowdown europe seemed to be mandating, we could have surprises, and then we had preannouncements -- well, wait a second. what actually happened? how about we had the best first quarter in 15 years. how was that possible? i think it's because the market has changed its animals. i'm not kidding. investors stopped being scared

of washington or europe or even earnings shortfalls and they decided to embrace the future, not spurn it. they became like ulysses and his crew, strapped to the mast, oblivious to the sell, sell, sell sirens of the saturn 9 set. where's sapphire when you need it? we got to the levels because standing pat paid off. let's look what happened to the five closely held tenants, the five pillars of wisdom just from last december. first, the tax code didn't change much at all. 13 million people probably don't pay any more income tax than they did last year. that's a phenomenal number of people who weren't impacted. spending had been shut down in this country because of the possibility of a complicated tax increase. it just didn't occur. more important, many rich people believed that stocks would not be good assets after the tax

code changes. dividend-paying stocks were sold aggressively because of the new change in taxes. many companies rushed their dividends to shareholders, putting money into tons of people's wealthier pockets. it was a bonanza, the ponderosa even! and that money acclimated into stock, flowed right back into them starting in january. the whole worry, every bit of bearish, how it would wreck dividend-paying stocks, backfired, which triggered the biggest rebound i have ever seen in 36 years of watching stocks and investing. in fact, the companies yielding 5% are now yielding 4%. the 4% yielding 3%. why is that? because the stocks went up jshs that's been the trade of the first quarter. so far, the defining trade of the year, actually. and it was all on the backs of, our friends, the bears. of course, the bears wouldn't stop. i remember saying at the beginning of the year now that taxes are unchanged, confidence can resume immediately.

i was hit with a tsunami of stories of how little i knew, because i was at the end of the payroll tax holiday. the busman's holiday of the tax code. i put it out the only rate that had -- that it had only been a temporary bet anyway. it wouldn't be a big deal. the bears made a real federal case out of it. they were wrong. it's insignificant. blown way out of proportion by so many bad-news bears. second, the fed didn't switch its strategy, because the fed chief isn't going to tighten until employment gets much stronger. something he's told me many time, but we keep playing the stupid parlor game. look, we're not where he said he would stop with the bond printing -- with the cash into the system, all right? if you want to understand why so many talking heads are screaming for the fed to tighten, you need to know -- you need to know that lots of the bears you hear are simply rich ideologues who just

want to spout has laissez faire programs. i got news for the folks. the bulls don't care. unlike the politically unmate investigated bears, the bulls know theirs is not the reason why. theirs is to make money or die. that's the rule number one in the alfred lord tennison guide to investing. contrary to what the bears expected, the government has been able to pay their bill, banks are solvent, except those in cyprus, which were crushed. you couldn't hire actors over there to get the runs looking like something. i haven't met a bull in europe, not for ages. but i'm thinking things will stop getting worse over there. stabilization, that's the topic. and money comes here whenever there's turmoil overseas anyway, whether it's be europe or japan. and the rich, they want their money here.

who can blame them? it's nicer here. the sequester. it turned out to be a brilliant nothing. brilliant, because it revealed there's no effort for the president to get anything done. maybe ever if the republicans control the house. we got -- look, if they win the next time, it's just going to be like this all the time. you know what this is? this is called gridlock, people. we had it in the '90s, and it was the best form of government. because governmental uncertainty is the biggest reasons why business is weak and it stops stock appreciation when you have the one party ruling. obama has twice tried to scare everyone into believing things would fall apart if he didn't get his way. it didn't. it didn't happen. plus, we'll probably see a very big decline in the budget deficit. mark my words. no one is saying this. because of the tax receipts in increases. they have made themselves irrelevant to the market. that's bullish. and the bears, the earnings. looks like first quarter won't be much better than fourth quarter. the wealth effect in the u.s.

courtesy of the values in homes going up and stock price improvement, with the potential stimulus in china combine to allow companies to give bullish outlooks. remember, it's the outlook and not the previous earnings. that's what matters. i think it's fair to say the bears aren't in control of the agenda anymore. you know what? their warnings, they've cost people too much money. their insistence that all we should focus on is when the fed will stop helping the economy has cost people too much money. their belief washington would destroy us or europe or china would destroy us, that didn't pan out. the s&p 500 moved to its all-time highs today. the reign of the bears, to me, seems to be winding down. they've been outed, not as skeptics, but as wealthy cynics, or even nullists, who believe in nothing. and like my buddy, one to destroy your opportunity to get

rich, too. there will be earnings shortfalls that will probably knock your socks off. after they get knocked down, unless they are crooked, corrupt, run by total buffoons, they will bounce back. i'm sure there are other countries in europe that will disappoint. slovenia, i got my eye on that one. the problems will be contained. i know there are always events that can occur, but unless they're totally catastrophic, we will look past them. that's because the bottom line is, as long as the bear creates the mayhem, the bull finds the answers. you can say the sky is in all, apocalypse then, now, in the future, i come back and say, fine. if you want to try to make money, remember the bull, not the bear, is now in charge. that's why we're finally able to break through to new highs on the s&p 500. sumner in new york. sumner! >> sumner in new york, how are you, jim? you're giving us wonderful past information on the hotel industry. >> you bet, chief. go ahead. >> what do you think? oh, i'm looking at the hyatt hotel corporation.

can i do as well as i did -- >> no, no, don't switch horses in midstream. stick with h.o.t. they don't call it hot for nothing. let's go to byron in indiana. byron? hey, by! >> bu-bu-booya! >> i like that. what's up? >> yeah, at the southern tip of lake michigan, in indiana, been a fan, never miss your show. want to thank you for all you do and all the advice you're given me. >> well, you're very kind. thank you, sir. thank you, byron in indiana. let's make money together. >> okay. i bought my stock, life technologies, after you had the ceo on. >> wasn't he a smart fellow? >> he sure was. he impressed me. what should i do now? buy? sell? >> -- 70th birthday, bruce. >> i think the stock goes higher. i don't want you to sell it. i would pay 70. we get all of the guys coming

in, want to take the company over. so hold on! it's good. animal spirits. it looks like the bears, they could be doing some hibernating. the almighty bull is in charge. i like it. "mad money" will be right back. coming up, breathe right? all week, cramer is taking out stocks that are lighting up the taste. tonight, jim is revealing a play that could keep your portfolio from indigestion. later, natural stunner. some are calling it the largest untapped field of nat gas in the world, and it could be about to make people a lot of money. it's a story of international intrigue. geopolitical power. and it reads like the latest bestseller, but this is far from fiction. cramer's got the play, all coming up on "mad money." oh, he's a fighter alright.

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. asking me if s&p 500 had an all-time high, you don't want to hear about my virtues of the cautious of discipline, but that's what i'm going to do. because my job is investing. don't get me wrong. you know, like all of the talking heads out there, i am a huge fan of the bull. [ applause ] [ mooing ] like most of you at home. hey, listen, i love it when stocks go higher. >> hallelujah! >> but i believe we need to be prepared in case one of the many warnings that the endless legion of bears comes true. that doesn't mean you sell all of your stocks today. coca-cola earlier, someone said they're nervous, no, don't sell

all of your stocks. huh-uh. no. some of the stocks rally in the first quarter, i understand that. you can dump everything that moved up a lot today, maybe lock in some gains. but i'm not in favor of that either, because those are the stocks that are winning. no. it means you need to own something to hold up if the market comes down. hey, maybe even go higher if the wheels fall off this bull market. and diversified portfolio stocks, you need one defensive name, to protect your wealth at all times. even in raging bull markets like this one where it might feel like that's a waste of money, you need an anchor, an that's why all week i am focused on big pharma. because they have what you need for the defensive slot. their business is not dependent on the economy, and they've got bountiful dividends. now, what about giving yourself more? well, two real great ones. j&j and merck.

tonight, we'll look at what more you call that all the time. look, not all big companies are created equal. for example, some drug companies pay dividends more bountiful than others. take, for instance, glaxo smithkline. gsk. the british company that's diversified, has a host of repertoire, cardiovascular, vaccines, diabetes, you name it. now, j&j is not a breakup play. not. although it has a big consumer division it could sell and unlock, and maybe unlock some value. they don't need polydent or tums, everything that i use here. anyway, this is not a catch-up play, like merck, which we talked about yesterday. this stock just hit a new 52-week high. so merck is the catch-up play. j&j is the breakup play. this stock is a dividend play. the american version of this british stock, called the adr,

sports a monster 5.8% yield, much bigger than the other names. and they tend to yield anywhere between 3% and 4%. not this baby. i would never recommend a stock simply for the high yield. sometimes that can be a red flag that the danger of the dividend being cut is out there. i think it company could be about to turn the corner. let me tell you why. it's a little bit different story from the others. first of all, glaxo had this huge illegal risk but has now put that behind it. when the company reached a $3 billion settlement with the federal government over the way they promoted some of their antidepressants and didn't report safety data on a big diabetes drug -- very bad. then in december, the company reached a bunch of smaller settlements with state governments and wholesalers.

while $3 billion may seem like a high price, this company throws off so much cash, i think it was actually a small price to pay. second and more important, glaxo smithkline has a gigantic pipeline of late-stage drugs that could possibly hit the market pretty soon. and some of these drug candidates have the potential to be big sellers. since the start of last year, the company has filed for approval for six new drugs. some of which could be multibillion-dollar blockbusters. merck had singles. j&j's breakup. but this one has multibillion. for example, next week, the fda is convening a panel on their new asthma drug, with the expectation of whether to approve it or not in may. a new melanoma drug approved in may or june. along with an hiv drug the fda is likely to decide on in august. plus, maybe more phase iii data on two high-risk drug, a new cancer immune therapy drug.

and a heart drug, all of which could be multibillion-dollar opportunities. this pipe is loaded. yesterday, i said merck is like the yankees. remember a lot of players in the pipeline getting on base. they're like the angels, pujols, trout, they're not living up to their potential at this moment. that's it. glaxo smithkline is an enormous company. $115 billion marketing cap. so the new products are probably too small to move the needle more than a little. but altogether? whoa. over the next three years, glaxo could launch 15 new drawings worldwide. that is a huge slate of new products that could help the company achieve an 8.4% compound annual growth rate today up through 2018, and that would be a very, very big deal. we know new products can rally the stocks, and even the large pharmaceutical companies these

new drugs, because glaxo smithkline, let's say it is in a race against time. [ buzzer ] with its biggest product, the asthma drug advair, about to go off the patent cliff. there's no free lunch, except diversification. right now, it accounts 20% of the revenue. that's unfortunate, because generic versions are expected to hit europe sometime this year. and they use the patent in 2017. this is an inhaled drug, and in the united states, it's at least especially difficult to get fda approval for generic version of the inhaled drugs. you have to believe the european side of the business could get hurt, and in four years, the u.s. side will be living on borrowed time. what else? the company's european business getting hit. but i think glaxo can begin to turn the corner, and they're restructuring aggressively, and a plan that could generate a billion pounds worth of cost savings by o 2016. the next few years for this one,

they're all about the pipeline. and i think the pipeline, though i never -- it's really interesting, because they're not known as a pipeline company. this is the best i've ever seen -- and pipeline is terrific. now, glaxo smithkline trades 16.6 times the earnings. if they can execute on the new drugs and cut costs, i think gsx could trade up 16 times earnings. i have to tell you it's 17% higher than it is now. don't forget the big dividend. the multiple over the last five years is 19 times. so the stock is pretty darn cheap here. i have to tell you, i really -- you know when i started working, yeah, 52-week high, i said, no, i have to do this one. and look at this one. okay? look at gsx's weekly chart. the stock has just broken out above the ceiling resistance that's been keeping a lid on it for the last -- the last year. and as we find over and over again in this bull market, the technicals do matter.

this breakout? it could mean the stock is ready to start the next leg of its rally after doing this massive consolidation. so here's the bottom line. all big pharma names are not created equal. glaxo smithkline gives you a bountiful yield, but they're in the race against time with the patent in four years. i think the company will win the race as it has a host of huge candidates coming up for fda approval in the not-too-distant future. and the chart? let's just say this is a chart that says it's ready to roar! stay with cramer. coming up, natural stunner. some are calling it the largest untapped field of nat gas in the world. and it could be about to make people a lot of money. it's a story of international intrigue. geopolitical power. and it reads like the latest bestseller. but this is far from fiction. cramer's got "the play."

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we were having with our rear brakes, she immediately triaged the situation, knew exactly what was wrong with it, the car was diagnosed properly, it was fixed correctly i have confidence knowing that if i take to ford it's going to be done correctly with the right parts and the right people. get a free brake inspection and brake pads installed for just 49.95 after rebates when you use the ford service credit card. did you tell him to say all of that? no, he's right though... i am always talking to you about the fabulous north american energy revolution here. the transformation with the new oil and gas finds we've been making in this country. but you know what? there's still tons being found overseas, too. we don't want to focus so hard on america. we don't want to be kpenphobic that we forget the rest of the world. take noble energy, a $21 billion

independent oil and gas company that i believe is the cheapest high-growth energy play out there. noble is the only capital oil company that has the potential to double its production over the next five years, also doubling its earnings per share. in just two years. imagine laying all of this out in december, an exciting day. i should have talked about it then. i thought the stock would cool high, but it's still trading at 14 times earnings. if the company meets those targets -- and i believe they can -- that multiple is way too low for this high-growth oil company. now, noble is a part of the shale in colorado. it's one of the shales we like to highlight on the show, one that maybe one day may rival the bakka. back in 2011, they got in the shale, a venture with console energy. it was a moment when gas prices were very low and a lot of action as companies had to raise

capital. noble energy is more conventional, the offshore assets make it so darn attractive, even at its two-week high. over the next two years, in the gulf of mexico, the eastern mediterranean, and west africa, the company plans to test 1.4 billion barrels of oil equivalent for net risk resources. this is oil and gas the company believes to be recoverable, even as they aren't classified as proved reserves. so as the tests are done, provided the results are good, they're like to get a series of -- like a pipeline for a drug company -- they will give a nice boost to the gas and oil reserves. and the reasons the company is drilling the test wells, it's all areas where noble's had success in the past. in the gulf of mexico where noble plans to drill three wells this year. the company has had an exploration success rate of over 50%. that's good for a major. i regard this as major, an independent major. then noble's international holdings. the company has already had multiple exploration successes

in both west africa and the eastern mediterranean. especially in their discoveries off the coast of cyprus and israel. israel and cyprus alone, they've discovered more than 9 trillion cubic feet of natural gas over the past two years. and this is not cheaper natural gas. the price for natural gas is much higher. and the play off the coast of israel, which is what anybody talks about, noble might have 17 trillion cubic feet of gas, and there could be a huge upside here. if the israelis give them permission to export the stuff. the company needs to get the approval from the knesset, the israeli parliament. a new director who happens to be an expert in the middle east policy and used to work for the state department. noble gas may be the key that allows europe -- this is really important. a big geopolitical angle, breaking the addiction to russian natural gas.

right now, they have a chuck hold on europe. but if noble partners with, say, turkey, you could see an instant revaluation upwards of nbl. as turkey can pipe it right through central europe, it might be israel to turkey, too. that's one of the reasons that recent approach between turkey and israel was so important. it benefits noble. i thought the stock would jump big, and it didn't. in west africa, noble is producing oil off equatorial guinea, and they've had preliminary results in sierra leo leone. these guys are everywhere. also nicaragua and the falkland islands. how about onshore? like i mentioned earlier, they have a huge position in the shale in colorado. some 640,000 acres. their acreage is mostly part of the liquid. they could have resource potential of more than 2 billion barrels of oil equivalent. that is gigantic. as of the year 2012, they had

drilled 400 horizontal wells in the niobrara shale. they're looking for an increase in the production of the horizontal wells, but given the acreage, they have 9.5 potential drillings. they have a specific piece of research where they pegged their assets at 13.8 billion. that's $80 a share, usually when you consider $117 stock, you add in the company's offshore assets, especially the giant natural gas field, the one i'm talking about off israel and cyprus, and analysts believe they have a net asset value of $160 a share, 37% higher than where the stock is now. i'm saying that's the upside of eog. i've always been thinking eog is the best. plus led by the brilliant and now legendary chuck davidson, whom i'd love to have on the

show. he is the real deal. unlike a lot of energy companies, with the risks, the shale during the natural gas boom market the last decade, noble energy waited. they just waited. they waited for the fall. their patience paid off. the nat gas market was flooded with new supply and prices plummeted, and that's when noble energy pounced, seeking a joint venture for a 50% interest in the 628,000 of the best marcellus shale acres there are. their shale acreage may be the capital or a little better. it's not far. they only had to pay $3.4 billion to do it. now, natural gas prices in north america are rebounding. i think they could take out $5. and this investment is looking very, very smart. so here we have an energy company, top-notch management, tremendous assets, could double production in five years if the new projects really start to ramp, and potentially double its earnings per share in two years. yet the stock is trading a big discount. i think noble energy is a steal.

so why is it so cheap? well, first, investors tend not to give oil and gas companies much credit for future production growth until the production starts to hit the bottom line. noble energy has excellent visibility. so i think the stock will ratchet higher as the production increases. year after year after year. so here's the bottom line. new paradigm for me. now, if you're looking for the cheapest growth energy stock, i gotta tell you, it's not nog anymore -- mr. papa, don't take offense, it's been fabulous -- but it's now noble. thanks to the fabulous finds in israel and cyprus, along with the shales here in new york, it may be at a 52-week high, but i think it's going higher, possibly a lot higher. i want to go to jason in virginia, please. jason? >> hey, jim, cherry blossom blow out to you from the nation's capital. >> i was there last weekend. just starting, nice magnolias. my executive producer's haunt of georgetown.

what's up? >> i'm a buy investor and had a position in transocean since the oil spill. i'd like to know whenever you see transocean getting to pre-oil spill levels. >> well, that's a tough call, because it would be there if it weren't for mccondo. the group is coming back. i think you're in great for that. i would have a half position on -- if the lawsuit goes really bad, i would pick the other half up. they aren't going anywhere. they are here to stay. i'm going to jeff in my home state of pennsylvania. april 25th, going to villanova. what's up? >> i'm interested in something we use every day, whiskey lima lima, petroleum, revenue growth and book value growth. >> i have to tell you, i do not understand why this stock is below 50. i think standard oil should bid 70 for them. i don't understand why they haven't come in. this company is there for the asking. i want to be a buyer.

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it is time! it is time for the "lightning round." we'll play the sound and then the "lightning round" is over. are you ready? the lightning round, gary in the illini. gary? >> jim, a big booyah to you from springfield, illinois. >> sweet. >> thank you for all of the advice you've given us. my stock is red robin gourmet burgers. will it be a restaurant in our city? >> it's not a bad idea. it's a bad idea.

it's a gross stock. i was going to shift it to panera. i think that's a good idea. go with it. craig in new jersey. >> hey, jim, craig calling from beautiful morristown, new jersey. >> hey, urban table. what's shakin'? >> oh, yeah. i hope you've been enjoying the rally as much as we have. hey, i got a question. all right, so 3g systems, triple-d. been in this for the long haul. you think i should hold or -- >> there's a lot of competition in that space, and that's what worries me. there's a lot of competition in that space. i want it to rally. i think it can rally. but i don't think you can make an investment out of it. i think it's a trade. i want to go to howard in california. howard. >> hi, mr. cramer. i was asking about floserve, a purchase price of 157. it's up to about 165. >> i don't care when it's coming from, but care where it's going to. i like that business. and also looking at emerson, a cheaper version with good yield. going to frank in michigan. frank?

>> hello, jim-bo. >> yo ho! >> how's it going? i'm a longtime listener, first time i got on. >> oh, that's good. >> i want to know about gnrc. i've had that thing for six months. got up to about 30% profit. but it just hangs around -- >> well, it's a disaster stock, because it makes generators. joe has one. i've been looking into it myself. i like briggs & stratton, because it has another offset besides just pure generator. i need to go to chris in florida. chris? >> hey, booyah! yeah, jim, i got a question about mosaic. i was asking you where do you see mosaic six months to a year from now? >> mosaic's okay. i'm not a big fertilizer fan, because i think the complex is going down. [ buzzer ] so i say it could go up 5%, 6%. not one of my favorites. i'm going to dave in my old state of pennsylvania. dave? >> hi, jim, great to be booyah

from northwest pennsylvania. >> i'm going to give you a master shout out booyah. what's up? >> i haven't owned the stock since early 2009 and it's nearly doubled that time. sempra energy. dos it have more room to run -- >> yes, it does. i really like it. for me, the east coast analog. i like that stock. let's go to scott in colorado. scott? >> hey, jim. booyah to you. >> booyah back. >> hey, i'm calling about phillips 66, i acquired it and it split off from conocophilips. >> look, i like it, but havaler is splitting off, so i think it's more valuable. and that, ladies and gentlemen, is the conclusion of "the lightning round"! the lightning round is sponsored by td ameritrade. [ cows moo ] [ sizzling ] more rain... [ thunder rumbles ] ♪ [ male announcer ] when the world moves...

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the new blackberry z10 with time shift and blackberry balance. built to keep you moving. see it in action at blackberry.com/z10 whether you like to watch the fed, the earnings calendar, or stock market levels, you've had an entertaining couple of days, hasn't it? the fed news came out early. oops! could have scared the market into a down there.

but instead chugged right along, record-breaking levels. but maybe you're getting nervous, as i know some people i talked to today on a conference call, nervous we'll have a pullback or last week's jobs number working around the corner, totally reasonable. totally. which is why i'm here to make sure you're doing everything you can to protect yourself. remember to cut off some of the upside. if the portfolio is well-rounded and you do your homework, you should be guarded against any crazy swings in the market. i want you to be up 2.5% on a day like today. that's why we play my absolute favorite game. this is where you call me. or you can tweet me @jimcramer, and tell me your top five holdings, and i'll tell you if you're diversified enough. let's start with a tweet. am i diversified? are you ready? conoco, new york times, warehouser, and blackstone. tweet, all right.

[ buzzer ] let me see what we've got here. conocophilips, and warehouser, too, a real me statement trust with a homebuilder in lumber. north american tanker is oil shipping. i am going to say it's different enough. and "the new york times" is a pay wall company that produces journalism. journalism, housing, tanker, private equity. holy cow. dave in california, please. dave, please. >> hey, booyah, jim, from west los angeles. >> holy cow. it's beautiful there. what's going on? >> well, first of all, i want to thank you for all your help. my wife and i never miss a show. >> that is so, so terrific. i love that. you know, i just want -- i wanted people to get it and then start prospering. what's up? >> here's my top five, and i'm 60. and i've just decided to retire this year. >> oh, lucky dog. i have to go for another 42 years. go ahead.

>> anyway, here's my top five. >> all right. >> realty income. >> yes. >> ryn, rainier, at&t, ge, general electric, and vtr, ventice. am i diversified? >> you know what i think he's got here? you know what i think he's got here, what dave's got here. dave has the perfect portfolio for a 60-year-old who thinks young. this is what i want, okay? look at this. he's got rainier. now, rainier, you may not know, a real estate investment trust, like warehouser, it yields 3, okay? ventas, remember we had that terrific woman on, deb? that's the real estate -- that's the healthcare company that yields -- deborah, she yields 3.5%. i'm trying to give you the yields. ge the company is around 3%. at&t north of 4.

realty income, real estate investment trust, we got that one, that yields 4.5%. it's a high-yielding portfolio that -- it has healthcare, commercial properties, it's got lumber. it's diversified industrial and telephone. that is just what i want, people. write that down, please. write that portfolio down. well done. dennis in illinois. dennis. >> cramer! give the black hawks, white sox booyah from chicago. >> i was going to say, it seems like i was going to put you in boston, but you're right, chicago. >> trying to make some "mad money" here. i have facebook, fb, ford, f, wells fargo, wfc, microsoft, mst, and alcoa, aa, but i'm thinking about gbx, green brier to free up alcoa. should i swap it? >> no, keep it as it is. alcoa down here, you're just really selling short. i think clause can pull it off.

facebook, i think that stock has bottomed. the naysayers, i think it's not a good call to be shorted. alcoa, obviously industrial. ford? if europe is good, it can rock. i don't see it happening yet. bank, tech, auto, huh-oh! tech, tech! we can't have that. you know what we have to put in here? we have to add merck. we'll take out microsoft and put in merck, and then alcoa industrial. that has to be done. can't have two techs, or otherwise -- back after the break. acceler-rental.

at a hertz expressrent kiosk, you can rent a car without a reservation... and without a line. now that's a fast car. it's just another way you'll be traveling at the speed of hertz. transit fares! as in the 37 billion transit fares we help collect each year. no? oh, right. you're thinking of the 1.6 million daily customer care interactions xerox handles. or the 900 million health insurance claims we process. so, it's no surprise to you that companies depend on today's xerox for services that simplify how work gets done.

which is...pretty much what we've always stood for.

what hasn't gone up a lot that can really fly if the economy is actually improving? how about technology? that's right, good old-fashioned tech, which dramatically underperformed in the first quarter. they've been horrendous performers for a host of reasons. the demise of growth in the personal computer, which has crimped for dell, intel, microsoft. and then the smartphone. or apple, hammered itself, left its suppliers in the dust. or the decline in enterprise spending that's damaged oracle, sisco, or decreased demand for semiconductors, and all of the

semiconductor capital equipment makers. i could go on and on and on for this gigantic part of the s&p 500. it seems that only the online companies with most leveraged to mobile have worked. mainly google, but now yahoo! and facebook. all that seems to have changed overnight with this new quarter, and while it may not be as sustainable as it appears once we get the actual earnings, there's a move afoot that has to be reckoned with. what could be driving the sudden urge to own tech? first, the rally is defined by a belief. a belief that the worldwide growth will return the second half of the year. the components? europe putting in the bottom. the bottom comes from the understanding that the leaders of europe will bend on the austerity issue. china put a damper on the spending, but it's behind us. inflation numbers are low enough, to stimulate growth. japan could have low growth now that the central bank is putting money -- did you know they used to be huge buyers of our tech?

china, too. the gdp for tech is on. it's a function of the gross domestic product. it's working. the consumer spending is getting more robust. second reason, valuations. they're insanely low. insanely low versus the worst historical levels. i had a conference call with charitable trust co-host, stephanie, a cnbc contributor, and we were marveling of the old tech stories, the old ones we know. they sell at 11 times earnings. do you know that oracle, intel, and sisco, even apple -- apple is actually 10 times earnings. hey, you know, back out the cash, it's just ridiculously cheap. western digital, 6 times earnings. i mean, seagate private again at that. it's not like the companies have no growth by the way. whatever growth we believe they will have, i think it could be accelerated by the second half if there's any expansion in worldwide gdp. in a world where safe stocks sell 18 to 20 times earnings,

with similar yields to microsoft, but much lower growth rate, you get any growth from these guys, any growth, which i think you will if the global economy improves, and the stocks can go higher. maybe much higher. just in case you think it's crazy, consider oracle. it's a company that screwed up big when it reported last. really painful. about three weeks ago. stock fell from 36 to 31 within the day. however, at that time, the stock sold for 11 times earnings. the result? oracle has had a huge bounce. have you seen it? it's at 33.73. i don't think it's finished going up. with the green light from the disastrous quarter, if we even get okay quarters -- unlike the hideous one from fortinet -- holy cow -- you could see a real run in old tech. you get positive running, and the run could last the whole quarter. tech is now coming back. if you can get through the earnings, this move could have some huge legs. as the sector plays catch-up with the rest of the stock market.

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