its fate is inextricably linked to the fate of the man at the center of this radioactive storm, but for now, julian assange's war against seek say rages on. . -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com >> fary tales don't always end happily ever after. sara ferguson, the ditch es of york had it all. perfect prince, perfect wedding, glorious life in the royal family and two beautiful daughters. then it all came crashing down, a nightmare of scandal, divorce, and scandal playing out for the world to see. >> i feel so totally ashamed. and i feel as though i was so out of control. >> i've known the duchess for more than 20 years. tonight you're going to meet the real sara ferguson.

>> it just has a very modern, different ending. >> a prime time exclusive with the duchess of york. this is "piers morgan tonight". >> sarah ferguson telling the story in the new story "finding sarah" the duchess of york joins me now. can i call you sarah or duchess of york. but you are fergie. >> at last someone remembers fergie. on my wedding day more people walking the dogs calling me fergie. i remember walking through the park "fergie" now what i have done? >> fergie is a great name. >> black-eyed peace said she tried to copyright fergie. you're trying to copyright fergie. you have an album called "the

duchess." give me something. you know what? come and sing for my charity and she did. she came to australia and she sang for the sarah ferguson foundation. we raised lots of money for building schools. she said, but my mom was a teacher or is a teacher. and so she loved doing it. she's very kind. >> i've known you over 20 years, in good times and bad. >> yeah. >> both probably in equal measure. we've had some great nights together. i know you i think pretty well. we always got on well. >> you've been through the mincer. but i've always felt you had a good heart. you've also meant well. also the bruising experience of being married into the royal family should never be underestimated. and i wanted to start this interview by taking you back to just before you get into that maelstrom. what you were like then. the book's fascinating called

"finding sarah". what was sarah like before the royal experience began? >> i actually was thinking before i came on this show sarah is the same sitting here as then. she just made a few weight changes and changed course a few times. i think sarah before she got married was head girl. but i think it's probably because -- i was great fun. and i have to say i'm a people pleaser and addict to that. looking back probably in times of school i just had fun. mom always said to me, can't you take anything seriously? even my confirmation. and i just enjoyed life to the full. i really believed in everything. i wanted to be an olympic show jumper. and then i went and found my wonderful prince. and sure enough, when he came into my life he came into my life when i was 12 years old at the jubilee at the bon fire at windsor park. >> that's when you first met him? >> yes. there's a picture of minimum and

i together then. >> do you remember that well? >> yes, i said i was going to marry him. and i was 12. >> you had the great fary tale of marrying the hand some royal prince. >> he's a good man. >> she's a very good man. and he stood by you i think through thick and thin, pretty remarkably over the years. when you actually started dating him, did you have any comprehension of what you were getting yourself into? >> piers, i think the word "dating" is kind of interesting. because when you date a prince back in those long years ago, 26 years ago, it's not -- you can't go out on a date. you can now. it's much easier. but before it wasn't like that. we had about three dinners one weekend, engaged and married. as fast as that. we were -- we knew instantly that it was -- it really was the lightning rod. and he's such a great, fantastic man. he really is the epitome of an english gentleman. very gentle, very strong, and personally believes steadfastly in that love.

as you've seen he supported me through thick and thin. you have this amazing wedding. the whole country, the whole world watched. it followed charles and diana's wedding. there was a huge royal fervor sweeping the globe. and you were the next couple, if you like, on the balcony. and it was a fabulous day. >> good kiss. >> that was a fantastic kiss. better than diana and charles, actually. more lingering. >> well, i really studied theirs. but i was quite into mine. >> theirs was a quick one. yours was quite passionate, i thought. >> yes, well, we married for total love. and when i went up there i had married my man. i also married a sailor and i got a prince. but my man is the most thing for me, piers. because nothing was more important than him. >> when you were on the balcony, i mean, very few people outside of the royal family have ever experienced that moment when you look out and there's a million people and you know there's probably a billion watching around the world on television. what's that moment like?

>> let me go back in time. you are taken with such a wave of energy that it is just mesmeric. it's so extraordinary. you're so in love, anyway. it's your wedding day. like every bride's day it's a special day and you've got a beautiful dress on. but you're standing there with the man you love. then there are people out there who are wishing you so well. and it's just extraordinary. it's just unfathomable. you can't explain it. and then when we got into the carriage to leave and my father did the most wonderful thing, he walked out of the palace and stood alone holding his hand on a quiet bit of pavement. as the carriage went round he just waved and said goodbye. it was so moving. >> do you think he knew what he was saying goodbye to? do you think he knew what you were going to be immersed in? >> he had a much better idea than i did, i think. he was in it all his life,

working with the prince of wales for 38 years. and he sort of knew. i think if anyone had said to me, do you understand for the rest of your life this is what you're expected to do, i would have still said yes because i loved my man. >> do you ever -- putting prince andrew to one side, do you ever wonder what your life would have been like if you just met an ordinary guy who wasn't a royal and wasn't famous and could have had just a very nice anonymous life? >> you know, dril phil said, sara, why don't you go and live in australia with your sister and go quiet. i don't think i'm that sort of person. i think i'm just i'm always wanting to do more. i want to use my life. i want to -- especially now that i've changed this course of health and wellness and getting creative and really using it the right way it's pretty exciting. i don't think i would have ever

gone to live in gloucester. >> how long was the fairytale a fairytale after you got married? >> well, it still is a fairytale. it just has a very different, modern ending. and andrew and i honor and respect each other. he's very kind when i arrive in edge land he gives me a room to stay in. and the two girls are fantastic. example of coe parenting. andrew and i believe very strongly in that. >> your daughters are fantastic. we had dinner, didn't we, the other day in new york? and i thought they were just so elegant, charming, polite, beautyfully brought up. i saw parts of both you and prince andrew in them. but a real credit to both of you. >> thank you. >> in terms of parenting. and i loved the saying at the recent royal wedding, your daughter wears this habit. everyone as they always did with you and others, they pile, in they love it, they hate it. and she responded in pure ferguson style, i think. "i'm going to auction this on

e-bay". >> what i love about beatrix, red-headed, 18 minutes past 8:00, no, she had to come at 18 minutes after. but what i love about beatrix she knows. she just does it. she's very switched on. she said mom i'm going to wear the hat. what do you think? i said great. $130,000 later, and it was literally a triumph out of disaster. >> do you think they learned from what they saw you go through, how to play negative media? perhaps a little better than you did because they saw the way to do it? well, and the way maybe not to do it? >> piers, you know what's so great? they've got a great role model of mistakes to follow. as mom goes along they go, well, we'll do it slightly different. so if i've done them a favor i'm really glad because i've done exactly what mothers can do is they can learn by my mistakes. i must admit that eugenie is

very strong. she's very creative. but she's got 12 inch metal rods down her back with scoliosis. so she's getting out and helping young people having to go through that operation. so together they seem to have their feet on the ground, strong and confident knowing what they want to do. >> you also had to be through very similar stuff to you in terms of lots of sniping about their personal appearance when they were younger. very, very hard for young teenage girls to be red kuehled for how they look in a bikini and so on. now they've developed into these fabulous swabs. you must be very proud of the way they didn't wilt under all that negativity. >> well, piers, i think that actually it's to do with good parenting and good guidance. and i think that solidarity of me always being there for them and being steadfast and never that feeling of abandonment. and i think that's what i learned from my mom is i'm very grateful to her.

but because she went to live in argentina, i knew what i wanted to do as a mother to my children. >> something both you and diana, you both had this thing with your mothers leaving. >> yeah, yeah, that's right. >> when you were both very young. and i always think especially for a girl, incredibly difficult when their mother just disappears. and leaves you behind. that sense of abandonment. i think i spoke to diana about this myself. she said that sense that you had that it is a sense of abandonment. you wonder why your mother has done this. >> i think that frances is a very good mother to diana. and mom was a great mom to me. we just -- it was a different era. you can't imagine that now. but in those times it was really -- we're talking many years ago. it wasn't really -- they didn't really know any better. they just sort of -- that's what they did. so i don't judge my mom in any way, shape or form. but looking back, i know what i don't want to do. maybe that's exactly the example you're just talking about,

beatrix and eugenie, i know what my mom did and i'm not going to fall into those mistakes. >> a bit of furor in the last few days what you said about your mother. you sort of implied it was a form of mental abuse. and your sister came out and said, well, i don't remember it being like that. she didn't deny what had happened as far as it was your memory, not hers. >> yes. what it is is that dad used to say, oh -- he's a most wonderful man. and i don't have anything against him. and my mother, she always said as she was going in the pram up to sunning hill to the sweet shop, sara comes from the postman. i had big red curls, big blue eyes and i didn't look anything like mom. it was a joke. she didn't mean it. that's what i said to dr. phil. also about she's got red hair and a temper and we're going to beat the devil out of her.

that is not exactly -- that is just mom and dad in the way they thaw. >> banter. >> banter. i said to dr. phil, that's what happened. he said that's not all right. i said why isn't it all right? >> i think it's more of a cultural thing. i think a brit would listen to that and laugh. americans take these things quite personally. they would think you can't speak to your daughter that way. >> that's exactly why my sister goes, oh, no, i remember that. but it wasn't really sort of anything at all. but in america it's very seriously, that is probably the big problem for me. >> i want to come back and talk to you about the tabloid press. the good and bad. how they built you into the biggest star in the world and then began to chip away at you. >> i'm ready. [ male announcer ] this...is the network -- a network of possibilities. in here, the planned combination of at&t and t-mobile would deliver our next generation mobile broadband experience

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in 1998 when beatrix was born, i said, okay, well, beatrix is fine. she's eight weeks old. and she's got a nanny. and she's perfectly healthy. and she's on bottles now. i want to see my husband. and i went to australia to find him. that's when the press turned on me. that's when they said i was a bad mother. bad fergie sold papers. >> an emotional moment there from your series "finding sarah". i remember all that. i'm part of the british newspaper, became an editor. >> that was one of your -- >> no. i wasn't. i wasn't involved in reporting on that part. but i remember it clearly. because it was the moment you could feel the mood towards you suddenly turn. >> perhaps you're right. >> you were portrayed as a bad mother. and yet when you actually studied the facts, you saw

andrew for 40 days in the third year of you marriage. it was ridiculous. because of his naval career. any woman would understand why you were desperate to be with your husband. it wasn't like you abandoned these children. you were coming back in a week or so, whatever. but that experience, when it turned, what was that like for you? >> well, i think that i believed the good press for the two years before then. so i was believing my own press which is the most dangerous thing you can do, isn't it? because now i know. so i believed that i was doing well and everybody loved me. and of course playing right into the the people pleaser. and when it turned, so it turned on me. and i turned on myself so badly that i went into self-destruct because oh, my gosh, the press are writing this. and i remember very clearly coming to your lovely lunch we went. to and i went in and i saw a man with a bald head behind one of the computers. and i went up to him. and he was laughing. he said, oh, hi, fergie. lovely to see you. how are you? and i went, oh, very well.

what do you do? he said, well, i write the headlines. and i was the one that wrote "the dumpett of pork" ha-ha. and i looked at him. he had no idea. >> that was one of the worst headlines. i remember you saying it hit you so hard. >> yes. >> duchess of pork was so direct, so offensive, it played right into your insecurity about your weight. it was -- i mean, you know, i'm not going to defend it. i think it was a vicious headline. >> i thought it was actually very funny now. >> funny to everybody else. and i had written headlines like that over the years, that you do without any sense of the con against for the human being. because in a way the royals at the time if you worked on the news papers in britain, they seemed like caricatures, like soap opera stars. like writing about television characters. >> and that's been always my problem. i took it personally. and i got very hurt. and the more i got hurt, the more i lost my confidence. and andrew was away. and when i say he's away, there

was no e-mails, no telephones. he literally went -- >> no texting, no e-mails, no internet, there's nothing. nothing like the contact you have these days. >> and you had to get a letter to mail bank to the post office in time which is a long drive in every day in order to get the helicopter to take it out to the ship. and if you got there and you didn't get a letter back, that's why i wrote regularly because i imagine what it must be like for a naval officer, sailors on a boat never getting letters. so i remember all those days. and the letters are beautiful. and i think they're a great testament. >> cripplingly lonely, i would imagine. >> i turned to food again, like i did when i was 12 when mom left. i felt very, very strongly alone in buckingham palace which is kind of extraordinary to say that. but i didn't know where to turn. and i turned down many wrong roads. and i think it's very interesting. because when your press goes up it's great. when it goes down and you believe it it's really very

destructive. >> what was the moment when you think the marriage basically ended? and there was a point of no return, do you think? >> the thing about andrew and i is that really our love is so strong. it's a really extraordinary love. we just seem to grow together even now. so i don't really see it as -- i know we're divorced. but we're divorced to each other. >> you've never remarried, either of you. >> no. >> and i've always harbored this quaint thought that one day -- you do live in his house. is it completely unthinkable one day the two of you could actually get back together? >> i think as i said a very modern fairytale. i don't know whether that we'd ever get back together in the marriage because i don't think that probably anyone would want me hanging around. but i think that -- >> well, the other members of the royal family, most of them may have that view. we'll come to the ones who have been very defensive of you and supportive. but he always stood by. >> always. >> he's a very good man, andrew.

>> the great thing about andrew is he does a fantastic job, as you know. and he also stands very firmly for what he believes that is right. and he stands in great strength with that. he fights so hard for his country. and no one realizes he does all this for his country. he doesn't have. to and he does it with great prude. >> what are your biggest regrets as the marriage fell apart and the press dived in, had all these exposes about you and your life. for you personally what do you regret now? >> every minute of my davy to regret now, piers, every day. because i regret divorcing. and i regret that i wasn't more aware. oprah said to me a wonderful line. she said, "sarah, true forgiveness comes when you can't change the past, when you give up hope that you can change the past." and that's what i've got to learn. i've got to stop trying to go

back to that burden and again with the awareness that i have now because i can't. >> do you feel ashamed of your behavior in that period? >> i think -- >> do you consider it as a kind of consequence of all the attack on you? >> i think looking back, of course with having worked with dr. phil, and oprah, looking back, goodness, with the awareness i have now? yes. i feel so totally ashame. and i feel as though i was so out of control. i didn't see or look at the ramifications of my actions. why didn't i? why didn't i just -- i was on the wrong course to self-destruct. >> one of the lowest moments i felt for you just looking at it from the outside is when the toe-sucking pictures appeared all over the front page of "the daily mirror". >> yes. >> it was such an intrusive picture. and yet it told its own story. when you saw that front page, what went through your mind?

>> well, i remember seeing it and just going, oh, no, sarah". that's when carolyn my best friend in the world -- do you remember carolyn? she said to me, now you need help, sarah. and i remember ringing her saying, carolyn, this is what happened. she said, you know what? you need help. this is crazy. what is happening here? and of course, i went through that. and i think it's an extraordinary tale. and it's one that -- which every day i work at. and every day i try and see how and why i did those things. >> i would have thought -- and we'll come back and i want to talk to you about the moment you hit rock bottom and how you then began to get back on top.

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fell in love, got married into public life, became a princess, went out there, did all her duties, giving exactly what the public wanted, and then it got to a point where i sabotaged myself. >> rock bottom for you really came last year with this big scandal that blew up in britain in the papers, investigated you and caught you on film apparently asking for 500,000

pounds in return to access to prince andrew and the royals. knowing you as i do and knowing the effort you'd made to get back on your feet and get money back and you had all these financial troubles, you were nearly there, and then this came out. and even someone like me, who's a friend of yours, i think you'd agree with that, found it hard to read that. >> yeah. i think many people found it hard. i can't read it, because it's not -- it's not the case. for 15 years, i knew this lady who came into my life and she was a good friend of mine and suddenly she said, oh, my father's son is coming to america and would like to invest in your company, and he would like to also support your charity work. do you want to meet him? i said, oh, yeah, that would be fantastic. so when i met him, i knew there was something off because his eyes didn't meet me and his knees were wobbling. are you nervous of something?

of course he was the journalist. >> i didn't really recognize you in those tapes. >> no, i didn't recognize myself. but i think, you know, there was a huge mistake, piers, and i can't even look at it because i just can't. because i obviously was exhausted, had drunk too much and i was broken to my knees. but the thing about all of this is what they did, editing and everything else, but the real truth is i would not in any way, shape or form sell access to andrew. that's not what i'm about, as you know. so the way they wrote it and the world saw it, i still can't live with because it's not true. >> how did andrew react when he saw that? >> like he always reacts when anything is written or anything is said about me or the girls, complete solidarity to his family. he's extraordinary. and he didn't -- he knows me. he knows i wouldn't do that. it's just the way they worded it, it was so harsh that i -- and the editing process and what they took out and put in. it was really just diabolical. >> of all the royal family -- >> i agree with you, if i was a friend, i would find it

difficult. >> i wouldn't say i felt let down by what you did. i felt disappointed for you that it was all going to blow up again, you were going to get booted around for another year or so. that the royals who didn't want you around anyway, their position would be hardened, make it harder for you. i thought there might be a royal wedding coming and i thought, well, i bet they don't invite you at that and all of this would chip away at your self-confidence again which is pretty well what happened. >> it did, yeah. >> of all the royals over the years, who have been the most supportive to you? >> well, i think like anybody who divorces a family member, it's, you know, you mustn't ever expect to be invited. it's not done. you're like any other couple or family, you're on the other side. but out of all of them it's wonderful that her majesty, the

queen, is such an incredible grandmother to the girls. i always love her very much. i think she's a great lady. and i think the prince of wales is an extraordinary father to his sons. he does such a great job, which more people should look at and he's an exemplary father. and i just -- i always, no matter what anyone says, i have a great huge love for the family and i will continue to do that. and that's fine with me. but i'm not around, because i shouldn't be. >> you didn't get invited to the royal wedding. i wasn't massively surprised. it was a bit too soon after the money scandal. how did you feel that day watching it all? >> well, piers, i was in thailand, and i was embraced by the jungle. and it didn't have a television and a radio deliberately, because i was so sad, you know. i was so happy for william and catherine. they looked beautiful and it was such -- i love the love story. i'm taken in it. i love watching telly seeing it's such a beautiful story.

i remember the love story andrew and i had, had or have, you know, so i know how it is. so i was very sad on the day because it brought back all those memories of me walking up the aisle. but, however, as someone said when i was sitting in a wonderful wellness bar in thailand, well, if you were there, you wouldn't be here and it's pretty good here. >> your girls were great that day and they wore these very controversial hats, these elaborate fascinators. i thought they were great but i know nothing about fashion. so immediately they're firing in they're this, they're that and so on and they reacted in a very smart way. >> well, i mean it was so difficult for them to be called the ugly sisters. how can you do that to two young they're 21 2 2, their nearly 23. >> they're not remotely ugly either, they're beautiful girls. >> well, thank you. i think they're pretty okay. every mother says their child are great but mine are great. but the thing is that, yes, for beatrice to turn it around and

say try and fund a disaster, $130,000 to charity is amazing. unicef and children crisis, fantastic. >> a charity very dear to your heart. >> very, very dear, yes. we started it in '93 and really believe children should have the right to be educated, right to dream. we're now up to about 43 schools. syria, liberia, afghanistan. >> i want to talk to you about diana, who was one of your closest friends for a very long time. but right at the end not so close. i want to talk to you about that relationship. ♪ ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] thanks to advanced natural gas turbine technology from ge, the power that will help make our nation more energy independent is right here in america. [ crickets chirping ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] advanced gas turbine technology from ge.

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my special guest sarah ferguson. let's talk diana. you and diana knew each other since you were 14 years old, and you were incredibly close. then of course you both married these handsome princes and shared this crazy life of princess and duchess. what was she like, diana? >> well, before she got married, i called her dutch because she was born for it, you know. born to be a princess. we all called her dutch, and i loved that. and there's no funnier lady -- i don't think i know anybody with her wit. do you remember her wit? >> she's hilarious. >> she was hilarious and she was always right there. on the quiet days and weekends that we were together, we'd laugh and have the best time

ever. we genuinely loved each other. >> she was very supportive of you for a long time. there was a big story about you when you were in money trouble and it was all over the front page of the papers. i saw diana that morning and she came over and she said you leave fergie alone. i said i haven't done it. she said you might do. she's allowed to get a flight. she was really on my case about it, it was quite funny. i saw then that she was protective of you. she knew what you were going through because she's part of the same system. >> the thing about dutch is that i miss her so much, you know, to this day because she was just -- she was really -- we were sisters and she was my best friend. and i absolutely adored her. and she did fight for me. in fact it was diana that arranged for me to come to windsor castle for racing that day. after lunch i went prince andrew is quite good looking. and she went duh, fergs, that's why you're here. we had a tremendous time. i thought what a great lady. what she did for hiv/aids.

actually i remember her saying i just want to support them because i know what it's like to be ostracized or to walk into a room and no one talks to you because they think you're untouchable. and in a way she understood that feeling. >> she was remarkable. she told me once she used to go out three or four times a week into the streets of london often in disguise and just hang out late at night with the homeless and take them clothes and food and stuff like that, but regularly do this and no one ever knew. >> no one knew a lot about her work that she did quietly, you know. >> right at the end of her life, she fell out with a lot of people, and you were one of them. you didn't speak to her for the last year or so. what was that about? >> well, we don't really know. i'd love to ask her, but she's not here. >> it saddened you. >> yeah, desperately, desperately. i think it was maybe she wanted a new course in her own life, you know. she was -- i don't know, i can't remember exactly when it started that she was going doing different things. but the thing is, like i said

before, is that my heart is still with her, so it really doesn't matter. i often say to people when they say sorry i haven't got in touch, i say it doesn't matter, my heart is never go to change and i'm very loyal to that. >> where were you when you heard that she died? >> i was in italy. she had the crash but she hadn't died so i made a telephone call to her mobile saying hi, it's me, i'm coming over, i'll be there in a minute, i'm coming to see you. and then i heard she died so i remember reaching out. and i heard from a great friend of both of ours that she -- before she died, you know, not on that day but the weeks before, she said i must get in touch with ole red, i wonder what she's up to so i sort of feel -- >> you would have made up. >> oh, yes. i think any siblings, sometimes you do that. >> how would she have felt on the royal wedding day, do you think, watching her boy, william, going down the aisle? >> honestly, total pride. total pride. you know, she would -- everybody did. we all did, didn't we? us brits, didn't you think

little william now looking so married and harry smiling. it just was an amazing day because i've looked at it afterwards, by the way. >> it was an amazing day. i was commentating. i felt very privileged to be there. be honest here, knowing her well. what do you think she would have made of kate? >> i think they -- i don't know except they would have been the best friends. i know she would have been so delighted because she would have got her daughter. >> you don't think she would have been a little jealous of all the attention. >> not at all, not at all. she always wanted to have a little girl and share clothes and things. she would have had her daughter-in-law. it would have been wonderful. >> it's pretty impressive kate, isn't she? the way she is handling it. >> i take my hat off to her. she's so serene. she glides like a swan. i'm a great fan. >> do you worry about her? do you worry about the pressure she's going to be facing?

>> i think she's able to cope with it. she's got a very good family. i love the look of her mom and dad. i don't know any of them, never met them. but they all look so together and solid. and i think that she -- the way her mum and dad are always there and pippa, it just looks lovely. i think it's homey and i think she looks absolutely incredible. and also she knows exactly, she's nine years they have been dating. she knows what she's doing so she's -- i think she's doing well. >> i think he's chosen a good girl. >> and i think that she so loves him. i think so, don't you think? >> totally. >> except my -- andrew and i kiss on the balcony -- >> was better. >> well, i think so. >> but they did two. let's just hold it there for a moment. when we come back, i want to talk to you about this extraordinary near-death experience. you were 20 minutes away from dying on 9/11. in one of the towers. i want to talk to you about that.

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unlike fish oil, megared softgels are small and easy to swallow with no fishy smell or aftertaste. try megared today. >> here's a look at your top stories. the dallas mavericks did it tonight. check this out. >> celebrations in dallas after the mavericks defeated the miami heat 105-95 to win the nba championship four games to two. it's the first championship in franchise history for dallas. jason terry led the dallas mavericks to 27 points and nowitzki had 21, lebron james had 21 for miami. look for gasoline prices to keep falling. the lundberg survey now puts the average price of a gal of

regular self-serve at $3.74. that's down nearly 17 cents in the last three weeks. according to lundberg prices will fall even more because of an overfly of gas at a time when unemployment is weakening demand. and gabrielle giffords will least houston rehab hospital by the end of the month to begin outpatient therapy. new photos of the arizona congresswoman were posted today on her facebook page. her mother is next to her in one of them. the photos were taken about a month ago. giffords was critically wounded in a january shooting at a tucson shopping center that killed six people. those are your headlines this hour. i'm richelle carey. so one of the little-known things i think about you is this extraordinary story on 9/11. you had an office in cantor fitzgerald's office block. your boss of the company, a friend of yours, allowed you some office space and you were

20 minutes late for work. you were going to go in to work that day and just weren't quite on time as you would have been. >> i was sitting at the "good morning america" studios actually. i went there this week and they remembered. i was rushing saying come on, come on, i've got to go to the office. the office was on the 101st floor and the window. and little red, my doll that stands like that was in the window looking down manhattan. i remember leaving the gma studios and heading down and then we stopped. as we left the studios, we saw the airplanes going into the 101st floor. >> when you realized what was happening to the people in there and you realized how close you came to being one of them, what was going through your mind? >> i think my friend who helped me with the charity, i think johnny has never really got over it because he just couldn't believe it, because that was his world, you know. he was living here all the time.

i just wanted to help howard and allison because they were such great people. howard lost, what. 700 people -- >> he's a remarkable man. he lost his brothers, most of his employees. >> and carried on paying their insurance for -- i think still does. he's an extraordinary human being. i love howard. and howard wanted to reach out and put little red and i there because little red was the logo of chances for children, and it was my way of thanking the american people for really giving me back my life. >> they have been supportive of you, the americans. more i would argue than you've experienced in britain. it tends to be on and off depending on the -- here they took you to heart. >> that is why it's been so difficult last year. the dreadful scandal. because i felt like i let them down as well. and betrayed them and the i felt really bad. and i think the americans have been so good to me.

i can't thank them much. and when you walk down the street, they embrace the goodness. they are always so welcoming. and they always -- someone asked me, do you think that william and catherine will have a good visit here. and i said, of course. because the minute they arrive here the americans will do their usual thing of opening their hospitality to everybody. >> i actually think the americans are as big if not bigger fans of our royal family than the british are now. >> i think so. i think so. >> they love them. >> i think that when you go around the wedding time, and i eventually got back to england from thailand, i actually couldn't get over how many americans were there. and just fascinated by it all. >> when william and kate go to hollywood it's going to be pretty crazy, isn't it? >> i think it should be amazing. >> i'd love it see the faces of all those big hollywood stars. do you think they're really, really famous when william and kate arrive in town? realize, you know, these are the really big once.

there's nothing like a british royal that has the celebrity power. >> and also coming up we've got william and catherine's wedding, then there's going to be prince phillip's 90th. >> 90 years of hilarious gaffes. whoops! >> i have nothing to say about that. >> a national treasure, really. >> no, he is. >> i mean, a rile trouper. >> but what he's done is that he's stayed and remained consistent and been steadfast to the country and to the monarch. and that's a love story, you know? >> yes. >> and when you see them together you see the twinkle in their eyes and that's incredible. >> he's a great unsung hero. >> i'll always remember when he said to me, sarah, just remember when you goat get up in the morning every single thing will be on the front page of every newspaper. so just remember don't do it. did i take his advice? no. >> listen, let's not dwell on the past. let's come back in a moment and

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. after 25 years in public life i have lost who i really am. and this torments me. i have hope that i'm going to start to live, to see if i

really will find sarah. i've got to do this. otherwise i will die. >> a very dramatic theme there from "finding sarah". it's obviously been a hugely emotional experience, making this series. oprah is an extraordinary woman, isn't she? because she recognized the potential of this not just from a tv point of view but for you to go through this cathartic self-awareness program is what it really was. >> when i -- the day after the scandal broke on may 24th, i thought the only person i could go and talk to was oprah. but i didn't know her at all well. i think i had done her show once. i went to oprah, did the show. and oprah said that she saw something in me, in between this ghost of destruction there was this hint of a glimmer. and i said to her, oprah, what do i do? she said, don't do "dancing with the stars" i think was the first thing. but she said, you know what? i can help you.

and then i went to arizona. and in working -- this is off camera. and in working i was talking to her from the time, she was so helpful to me. she was like the most extraordinary iconic lady. >> did you find sarah, do you think? >> well, i think that -- can i just say that oprah said to me when i was working with martha, i don't want to ask you because you're my friend. but what about making a documentary? after i had asked her should do i a cooking program in australia? no, no, don't do that. i went and talked to her. yes, help me find sarah? no, i think sarah is a work in progress. i think this is going to go off camera for many years to come. but what i do know, piers, and i'm so excited about it is that i've changed the course of destruction to positivity now. i'm creative, i'm passionate. and i now feel that i'm liberated in my head. what i was doing wrong is i was listening to the crazy sorts and acting out on them, self-hatred

or whatever i have chosen to be the thought of the day that would ruin my day. and the people i went to see, back on course. back on course. opened my eyes. >> for you personally, would you like to get married again? would you like to find a new mr. right? your life? >> well, i always say when you've had the best forget the rest, do you know? andrew is the best. and i don't think i'll get married again. but i think a boyfriend. should we use this as a "dateline" in cnn "dateline"? >> if you don't mind me saying, pretty hot. >> thanks, piers. >> good time to put yourself back on the market then. >> come on then. don't think the show has ever been used for that before. >> well, there's a first time. >> duchess dating today. but the thing is, i don't think any man would come near me, though, because as i've always said they have to put up with kind of a lot of press and attention. >> i think they should. because i've known you a long time. you're what we call a good egg i think is what w