we're genuine in our acceptance of your apology, i personally would like to invite you on behalf of dyngas day, buffalo, and on behalf of the entire city of buffalo, to come to our festivities next year, and you'll be the very first ever pussy willow prince. we'll crown you as the pussy willow prince. >> are you trying to make me giggle again? >> i hope everyone knows i was calling myself and my stupid laugh stupid, not dyngas day, and if i did really offend you, i'm sorry. i said it last night, i'll say it again to the good citizens of buffalo and elsewhere, happy belated dyngas day. >> how can you not laugh watching him giggle like that? remember, you can watch all of the top ten ridiculists of 2012 in the featured section of the cnn section of apps for the ipad. thanks for watching. join me tomorrow at 4:30 p.m. eastern for sanjay gupta m.d.

>> any excuse i make, whether it was a rough time in my life or the people that were there were my friends and they kind of like baited me, none of that matters. >> maria, she has been truly the only love that i have ever had. >> the laughs. >> you're not pronouncing it correctly. >> people say you look fantastic. >> they're the stories that shocked us. >> if you want to get high, you're going to get high. >> from heavyweights. >> i know how to handle them. >> and the fastest human alive. >> and without a doubt, the most explosive and dangerous interview of my entire life. >> where are you going? >> i'm interested in what happened. >> no, you're not. what are you doing? what the hell are you doing? >> it's the interview people are still talking about.

tonight, we'll sigh why. "piers morgan tonight, the entertainers" starts now. >> good evening. i have talked to? of the top entertainers in the world, people who make us laugh and make us cry, and as i sat down with them, they also make us think. every one of them has fascinating and sometimes surprising things to say. every one of them is also a lot of fun. tonight, you'll hear some of my favorites. we begin with a man who was as famous for his outbursts as his acting. he's of course alec baldwin. your relationship -- >> cleverly alluded to. >> your relationship with the media is fascinating because you have always been very good copy for them, and you sort of play the game, and occasionally you blow up. now you seem to be almost on a permanent rage with them. why do you have such conflict with them? >> i don't think i really do have any conflict with them in

the sense that that guy you're talking about, that photographer, i think the most important thing to remember is i did not punch the guy, and the guy was overheard by witnessing going down the street, going with his finger, there's one, i like that one. he's going through his roll of film on his digital camera. then they go to the police station, then he presses charges. and the charges are dismissed. i don't think i have someone where i have the d.a.'s office or the police department in my pocket. they didn't believe the guy, they dismissed the charges. >> i say this with great respect because i know you get much more attention than i would, but whenever i come across these guys, especially tmz, they follow you around with a video. >> a very low threshold for entertainment. >> i find them a necessary part of the business. >> that's a difference of opinion. >> i would call them a tax, a tax on show business. >> you have a very different opinion than i do.

my attitude is the business would be infinitely better if all of them were gone. >> really? >> if i could flush a button tomorrow and flush them down some swirling vortex, where is the button? i'll do it now. >> what if they said you could never have any more publicity in any magazine for anything? >> that's not practical. you know you will have publicity. listen, i'm not opposed to even though i'm not completely ecstatic about the entertainment journalists because i think it cheapens show business and demystifies show business, but the ones which you call the gotcha journalism, that's one i think we could all do without. last time you were on the show, i got great feedback for the back story you bring. before you even get to making movies, but the one thing i came away from is you had in changing your life around, the work ethic

that you brought to everything that you now do, incredibly impressive, and nothing tells it better than this. they said about what you did, that particular thing is the most prepared human being. there's nothing he can't do. such a humble guy, and you're not like look at me, i can do this, but it's an amazing thing you can do that kind of scene in one hit. it shows proper dedication. >> it's your job, you know. i worked with many actors who are paid a lot of money and they show up and don't know their lines. >> any names? >> yeah. i'll tell you after the show, but it's frustrating to me because you're getting paid a lot of money. you have this amazing job. just show up and be prepared. you know? just worked with russell crowe, and the guy is such a pro. we had pages and pages of monologue, and the guy just every single time. >> who was the best prepared? i wouldn't expect you to dish the dirt on the underprepared, but who were the ones you look at and go that's where i want to be?

>> russell crowe was extremely prepared. you know, robert duvall is the consummate professional. when you wanted to begin show business, what part of the allure of it being famous, if you're honest, if you look back to that time? >> i have to say, and this is true of a lot of comedians, and i talked to other comedians and heard them say the same thing, and i defy anyone to deny this. for most of us, it's getting girls to notice us. it really is. and it's -- it's still probably on some level, i'm very happily married, two kids, but there is something initially especially in those early days, you notice. you go through the checklist in your mind, what do i have that might interest a girl. and i didn't have much. i would go through the list, i'm not a good athlete, my skin

is -- go down the list, the hair is a little silly, the name is weird. then i got to, they laugh when i start joking around, they laugh, and they hang around a little bit. so probably that's the initial -- if i'm going to be brutally honest, just to get -- >> to get girls. >> not even to get them, to get them to look in my direction. i'm taking it down to a much more basic level. you said i feel like a lot of news outlets have abdicated their responsibility. critics would say, you have to live in the real world a little bit in the sense that if you go to highfalutin of your news coverage, if you try to do it in the purest sense, what your character does in the show, it doesn't work, especially if there's not big breaking news. i can tell you for a hard, unpalatable fact that is true. >> i know it's true. >> it's hard, so how do you tackle that? now you have had your toes

dipped in our waters for a while. if you were running a news network, what would you do? >> let me back it up and say i don't have to live in the real world. i'm a fiction writer, so i get to write a democratic administration that can get things done. and i get to write about a very idealistic news room where these guys reach unrealistically high so they fall down a lot, but we're still rooting for them anyway. there's no question that the antagonist in this show is -- doesn't come so much in the form of a person, although that's the role jane fonda plays and that's the role that chris messina plays. it's ratings, that if we have a problem in this country with the news, it's at least as much the consumer's fault as it is the provider's fault. but this show doesn't live in the real world. it seems like it does because

it's set against a backdrop of real news events. we never do fictional news on the show. it's all real. the characters are all fictional and not based on anybody. i know you're going to get to that question. but they are constantly referencing don quixote, camelot, and the name of the cable station is atlantis, and these are all major lost cities. >> unabashedly romantic. he excels in that. it's the happy ending, the swashbuckling, he said. and he told me when we started this, by the way, if you're in here to be likable all the time and to -- it ain't going to work that way because you're going to fail. will is going to fail miserably. and we do. over the first season, it is a struggle, just like the struggle a lot of these tv journalists say they're going through every day. >> and will is a quite spectacular [ bleep ] from time to time. but i like him.

>> behind the music, there's something for everyone. singers tell their stories. >> i was about to ask you how many times you had been properly in love in your life? >> the past is just a blur to me now, piers. it's just a blur. now is the time. now is all that matters. upside down. >> hi. >> hi. you know, i can save you 15% today if you open up a charge card account with us. >> you just read my mind. >> announcer: just one little piece of information and they can open bogus accounts, stealing your credit, your money and ruining your reputation. that's why you need lifelock to relentlessly protect what matters most... [beeping...] helping stop crooks before your identity is attacked. and now you can have the most comprehensive identity theft protection available today... lifelock ultimate. so for protection you just can't get anywhere else, get lifelock ultimate. >> i didn't know how serious identity theft was

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a bruising encounter, i generally enjoy talking with musicians, new artists and those whose songs define a generation. then there are those rare occasions when i can ask a singer which of their songs means the most to them. ♪ hello >> that was terrible.

that was terrible. i have a great tweet mere. watching lionel richie. fascinating dude. love his funky stuff. not into the ballad. >> you know what the answer is to that. i will tell you that, he's not in love yet. >> that is true. >> listen, i can tell you. >> dancing on the ceiling until you meet the right girl. >> reviewer for years, the reviews were sappy, syrupy, sticky, gummy. here is lionel again another one of those songs. then he reviewed me 20 years later, and he said do you have another one of those amazing ballads? i said, you're married now? he said, two kids. truly, until you fall in love, you know nothing of what i'm talking about. >> have you ever made love to your own music? >> you have asked me -- who is this guy? >> i always wanted to know that. >> my first love wasn't enough? >> i need more.

>> the answer is absolutely not. >> never? are you kidding me? would it be awkward? >> i love it when someone says, do you whisper? of course, i do. are you kidding me? >> who is the biggest, most romantic, sexual singer you have ever deployed. >> holy cow. interesting. well, marvin gaye. >> has to be, right? >> marvin did it for me. i want to talk about garth straight off the talk. let's talk about the elephant in the room. you're one of the most famous country singers ever and you're married to one of the most famous country singers ever.

your husband and i never met but i feel like i know him really well. the reason is for the last six years on "america's got talent" i have seen more acts murdering your husband's songs than probably any other musician or singer alive. if i have to hear one more version of "if tomorrow never comes." it gave me severe earaches. i would like to apologize to him via you for the massacring of music. >> at least you feel you have a connection now, and you massacred that. >> it wasn't as bad as singing "hello" to lionel richie. >> were you really trying? >> i like to make the guests feel like they're the star. contrary to public perception, so i think with you and lionel, i make you think you're better singers, give you more confidence. >> an ego boost? that's nice of you. >> you've only sold what, 10

million albums? >> something like that. >> what's the worst song you have ever written? >> i don't want to say it. this is cnn, come on. >> what is the worst bruno mars song you have ever written, even now it makes you come out in a weird sweat? >> me and my partner phil wrote a song called "bedroom bandit." that's all i have to say. that's all i have to say. >> i can't even imagine. >> but i promise you, had you been in the studio, we thought we were going to win 18 grammys off this song. and the next day, we called each other up and were like, what were we thinking? >> you have been involved with songs about desperately wanting to be a billionaire. >> and that's the beauty about "billionaire," you listen to the lyrics of it, it's really not about -- i mean, it is. we touch on it a little bit, but why i wrote "billionaire," i wrote "billionaire" when i was flat broke. i just helped write a song for

flo-rida, the number one song in the world, biggest downloads ever, it was the number one song for how many weeks, it broke records, and i was flat broke. >> how? >> because i can explain all that. it was just -- it works differently for song writers. song writers, you have to wait for residuals, you have to pray that the song is going to be a hit, and a year later, you might get a check. >> you sing the song, go around the world, massive, huge, international hit, and you're making nothing. >> and i can't buy a sandwich. >> literally? >> literally. >> what is the song, out of all the songs, you have ever been involved with, what is the one, if i said you have five minutes to live, you can play one song. to be remembered by. the defining song. >> well, you know, i have my favorite records. >> what's your number one? >> i loved one of these night. i thought it was a really interesting song. it was kind of cowboy r&b, great soul singer, don henley, you know, cool chord progression, mine. you know, that was one of my absolute favorite eagles records.

>> who -- of all the acts out there, who is the one that excites you of the modern crowd? >> i love adele. >> yeah. >> and i think -- i watched the grammys this year. and the grammys, there was a lot of glamour, a lot of dancers, a lot of flash. there was a lot of that. and then adele came on. and everybody was dressed in black, and they only had white light on her, and she just stood there and burned. >> when we come back, my favorite sports interviews of the year, the men and women who inspire us with their quest to be the best. >> yes! yes! >> oh, come on! that was nice. you did good. you beat me.

[heart beating] [heartbeat continues] [heartbeat, music playing louder] ♪ i'm feeling better since you know me... ♪ announcer: this song was created with heartbeats of children in need. find out how it can help frontline health workers bring hope to millions of children at everybeatmatters.org.

anyone who knows me knows i i'm a football fanatic. the round ball, football. also attended the summer olympics in london and even made a bet with former president bill clinton on the ryder cup which

he paid up for, by the way. this year i talked to the biggest names in sport about what it takes to be the very best and what it feels like to be a world champion. what a moment for you, eh? the green jacket. can i touch it? >> yeah, go ahead. >> how does it feel? >> it feels nice. >> how does it really feel to be bubba watson right now? >> it's overwhelming. people like yourself wanting to talk to me. for me to come to new york and do these interviews and meet you for first time. it's a special time. >> why have you given me the big exclusive interview? somebody's told me the rather unnerving reason why. >> because when you were on this other show "america's got talent" you were a [ bleep ]. so i wanted to come here and make fun of you just like you make fun of everybody else. >> i heard that was the reason. it genuinely was, wasn't it? >> yeah, for sure. >> because i'm a [ bleep ]. i don't care how we got you here, i'll take it. >> how hard it is, mike, for people who have been at the top of boxing with all the adrenaline and the buildup to these fights for months that you get in there, the adrenaline rush, the public going crazy and then the actual fight, then suddenly it's all over? you don't have it in your life anymore. fleinhaanryto3 do you -t 'blow up an.% situations. i never look at myself, this could never bother me again. once i think that way, i'm looking for my next hit. once i feel like this is how i think, i feel i'm the man again. i can never get high. any moment now i'm ready for the next line. that's just who i am. that's how much of an animal i am when it comes to drugs and addiction. i'm really a nasty animal. that's how come i'm so happy. it's changed my life.

i'm with my family. i'm learning how to be a functional human being in society. it is just so awesome. >> when was the last time you hit a man? >> i don't know. maybe three years ago at the airport. remember that ordeal in the -- >> with the photographer, yeah. good shot? >> yeah. no. i'm so happy because i was getting ready to hit him with the camera. i'm so happy i didn't hit him with the camera. i wouldn't be here. so happy i didn't do that. >> i presume the paparazzi give you a pretty easy ride now, right? now that they know there's a good chance you might punch them. >> i know how to handle them now. i don't want to beat them up. just love them. just love them. >> last time i saw you play for real was at wimbledon. it was about three years ago. you were playing a quarterfinal game against a tiny eastern european waif. it was the single most brutal thing i've ever seen on any sports arena ever. >> now you're making me feel bad. >> you didn't feel bad at the time. but inwardly, i wanted to get on the court and rescue this poor girl. >> oh, no. >> it was a high form of brutality that was going on. you just obliterated her. but what i was struck by was the longer it went on, just the more ruthless you became. the more in the zone, the louder, the more physically empowering. it was the most impressive thing i've seen in sport for years. what do you feel when you're going through that kind of process. >> yeah. a3 p>t' n aute,s ? crl pats.3 % i'm not going to sit here and let you or anybody else kick [ bleep ] out of me without defending myself. and you can take that to the [ bleep ] bank, charlie. if you want to show me the door, that's fine, too. three big names. a scandal in tabloid headlines. each told me their sordid stories, only one had me actually fearing for my safety. here's a moment from an interview like none i have ever done before and i hope i don't

have to do again. my conversation with robert blake. do you remember the night that she died well or is it now something you've blocked out of your head? >> no, i remember it quite well. >> you went and had dinner at this restaurant. >> where are you going? >> i'm interested in what happened. >> no, you're not interested. what are you doing? what the hell are you doing? >> let me help you. there's no one talking to me. okay? you haven't got a worry. there's nobody talking to me. these are my questions for you which are based in my view -- >> now you want to know what happened that night? >> i'm curious, yeah. >> no, you're not curious. >> i am. because you were acquitted. >> i thought you said you uttoo autou3 %pfe sted fil significant than a little boy with no parents, no friends, nothing, walking into mgm and three years later starring in his first film. you know how significant that is? no, because you've never lived my life. >> it's my fault. there's no one else to blame for it. i wouldn't even begin to start pointing the finger at anybody because the reality of it is that i created it. i created my career and all those kind of things and the relationship and all of this, but i also screwed up badly. and i take the full blame for it. the key thing now is to kind of like, you know, figure out how do i build all this back and how do i gain the trust of the children again and have a good relationship with the kids, which is so important to me. i love my kids dearly. and i love maria. i mean, i love maria. she has been truly the only love that i've ever had. and that's what is so pitiful about it. it's one thing if you have a situation like that and you say i was ready to get out of this situation anyway, out of this marriage, but that's not the case. she was the most perfect wife. and she was extraordinary. >> you've hinted in some of the interviews you've given that you hope to get back with maria. in fact you've gone a bit further, saying you believe from rtn deap this may also b are. you get on situations like your show and when asked, at the end of the day, you realize it was a horrible choice. i am accountable. and any excuse i make whether it was a rough time in my life or the people that were there were my friends and they kind of like

baited me to, none of that matters, it's just that you're accountable and honest. >> it must be very humiliating. have you ever been through anything quite like this where you actually have yourself having sex on a video that people are watching, especially in the internet age, how do you feel about that? >> never. and i've been through a lot of stuff. i've been through a lot of stuff with the federal government back in the '80s, the whole steroid controversy, divorce, i've been through so much stuff, but never have i ever been this embarrassed and never has my world been turned upside down in such a fashion. and without knowledge that someone would set a camera up. poor choice, admitted. it's me, i did that. >> coming up, the biggest names in music, whitney houston and dick clark. >> this is the beaver that bit your hand. >> this isn't is same beaver, but this is the one that did it. exactly like this. have you ever touched a beaver? >> no. the world lost some beloved entertainers this year from larry hagman and andy griffith to davy jones of the monkees and adam yauch of the beastie boys. two deaths in particular stand out because of the lasting impact on american culture. dick clark, the eternal teenager, and the tragic loss of whitney houston. i can tell you're angry about what's happened here. the blame game has begun. boowt of peleantola l opeleantola haou? >> it's everything. all a package. all a package. everything comes together, i think. but for me, the fans are one of the biggest things for me. i really enjoy just going out and performing for the fans. the energy that they give me. >> when we return, so many scandals. and one interview that went right off the rail. yes, i'm looking at you, robert blake. >> it's not about me, is it? >> yes, it is. because you open that door, charlie potatoes. i'm not going to sit here and let you or anybody else kick

[ bleep ] out of me without defending myself. and you can take that to the [ bleep ] bank, charlie. if you want to show me the door, that's fine, too.

three big names. a scandal in tabloid headlines. each told me their sordid stories, only one had me actually fearing for my safety. here's a moment from an interview like none i have ever done before and i hope i don't have to do again. my conversation with robert blake. do you remember the night that she died well or is it now

something you've blocked out of your head? >> no, i remember it quite well. >> you went and had dinner at this restaurant. >> where are you going? >> i'm interested in what happened. >> no, you're not interested. what are you doing? what the hell are you doing? >> let me help you. there's no one talking to me. okay? you haven't got a worry. there's nobody talking to me. these are my questions for you which are based in my view -- >> now you want to know what happened that night? >> i'm curious, yeah. >> no, you're not curious. >> i am. because you were acquitted. >> i thought you said you researched all this, so you know what happened that night. >> i know the facts of the night. >> what? tell me about the facts of the night. >> you take your wife to dinner to a restaurant. >> go ahead. >> your wife goes to the car. you go back to retrieve, as you say, your gun, which is in the restaurant. and when you return, your wife has been shot dead. when they test the gun that you go and retrieve, that is not the same gun that killed her.

am i right so far? >> so far. >> factually correct. i have no agenda here at all. you clearly think i do. i don't. >> it sounds boring as hell. but go ahead. >> i don't think it's boring, your wife got murdered. >> your questions are boring. even what you just said, are you sure the people give a [ bleep ] about any of this? >> i think you're here because you've written a book about your life. >> there's a lot more to my life than that night. >> but there's probably nothing more significant to your life than the -- >> [ bleep ]. >> really? than the murder of your wife? >> i didn't murder my wife. it may be significant to you. >> i didn't say you did. >> but it isn't to me. you said there's nothing more significant. >> than the murder of your wife. >> personally, it's not the most significant thing in my life. >> what is the -- >> the most significant thing in my life is when i was 2 years old and i found an audience. the next most significant thing is when i went to mgm as an extra and three years later i

starred in my first film. you know, america just was going to war was the worst time in the world for america. but there's nothing more significant than a little boy with no parents, no friends, nothing, walking into mgm and three years later starring in his first film. you know how significant that is? no, because you've never lived my life. >> it's my fault. there's no one else to blame for it. i wouldn't even begin to start pointing the finger at anybody because the reality of it is that i created it. i created my career and all those kind of things and the relationship and all of this, but i also screwed up badly. and i take the full blame for it. the key thing now is to kind of like, you know, figure out how do i build all this back and how do i gain the trust of the children again and have a good relationship with the kids,

which is so important to me. i love my kids dearly. and i love maria. i mean, i love maria. she has been truly the only love that i've ever had. and that's what is so pitiful about it. it's one thing if you have a situation like that and you say i was ready to get out of this situation anyway, out of this marriage, but that's not the case. she was the most perfect wife. and she was extraordinary. >> you've hinted in some of the interviews you've given that you hope to get back with maria. in fact you've gone a bit further, saying you believe from her side this may also be something she may wish. do you think there's a good chance you could get back together? >> i cannot speak for maria. she has to speak for herself. but i can only tell you that i hope that eventually we can rebuild the relationship and that we'll be together as one family. >> what people find most incomprehensible is that somebody as successful as you,

somebody as rich as you, as politically motivated as you were at the time, would take such an extraordinary risk. but was it actually more complex, was the risk you were taking seemed like one of the safest risks you could take, somebody in your home whom you could trust, who wouldn't tell anybody? was it more of that? >> i would say that it makes no difference, you know. it makes no difference what was going through my mind at the time. it doesn't clean up the mess. it doesn't soften the blow to my family. i mean, what i've done is just about the stupidest thing that any human being can do. >> before we get into politics and life and the universe, a certain story has bubbled up this week about you involving a certain videotape. >> yes, sir. >> how are you handling it?

>> the big white elephant in the room we can't avoid. you take a deep breath. you have to make sure that you're honest because you have to be accountable. and you know, you address it and at the end of the day, you know, pray to god that those that love you and the people close to you, like your friends -- sometimes you don't even know if they're your friends, but your children and your wife, that's who you are. you get on situations like your show and when asked, at the end of the day, you realize it was a horrible choice. i am accountable. and any excuse i make whether it was a rough time in my life or the people that were there were my friends and they kind of like baited me to, none of that matters, it's just that you're accountable and honest. >> it must be very humiliating. have you ever been through anything quite like this where you actually have yourself having sex on a video that people are watching, especially in the internet age, how do you feel about that? >> never. and i've been through a lot of stuff. i've been through a lot of stuff

with the federal government back in the '80s, the whole steroid controversy, divorce, i've been through so much stuff, but never have i ever been this embarrassed and never has my world been turned upside down in such a fashion. and without knowledge that someone would set a camera up. poor choice, admitted. it's me, i did that. >> coming up, the biggest names in music, whitney houston and dick clark. >> this is the beaver that bit your hand. >> this isn't is same beaver, but this is the one that did it. exactly like this. have you ever touched a beaver? >> no. just before that rich sweetness touches your lips. the delightful discovery, the mid-sweetening realization that you have the house all to yourself. well, almost. the sweet reward, making a delicious choice that's also a smart choice. splenda no-calorie sweetener. with the original sugar-like taste you love and trust. splenda makes the moment yours.

[ male announcer ] when diarrhea hits, kaopectate stops it fast. powerful liquid relief speeds to the source. fast! [ male announcer ] stop the uh-oh fast with kaopectate. the world lost some beloved entertainers this year from larry hagman and andy griffith to davy jones of the monkees and adam yauch of the beastie boys. two deaths in particular stand out because of the lasting impact on american culture. dick clark, the eternal teenager, and the tragic loss of whitney houston. i can tell you're angry about what's happened here. the blame game has begun. a lot of people want to blame bobby brown. a lot of people want to blame the music business. some people want to blame everyone. what do you think? >> well, it's all of the above and a whole lot more.

but it boils down to you. you know, i was introduced to certain people and to certain opportunities to use recreational drugs, and it boils down to whether i want to do it or not. and she was a strong-willed, strong-minded girl. and i can't say that it's anybody's fault. >> would she have ever gone down that route, do you think, without bobby brown in her life? >> well, if not him, somebody else. if she wants to get high, if you want to get high, you're going to get high. >> do you think she had that tendency anyway? >> i think that we all as artists, because we're highly sensitive people, and this machine around us, this so-called music industry is such a demonic thing, it sacrifices people's lives and their

essences at the drop of a dime. >> we touched earlier on whitney houston, who was a friend of yours. you've been quite candid about trying to help her. you rang her or felt compelled to ring her on the night that michael jackson died. >> yeah. >> because they were similar age, similar kind of problems. you realized she may be going through turmoil over that news. tell me about that. >> it was -- and i haven't talked about it publicly. i'm surprised that you know that. how do you know that? >> i know everything, tyler. >> i called her that night and i had been trying to get her all day. i called her that night. she had donny hathaway's "a song for you" blasting in the background. i was surprised she could hear me. we talked for a while. she was really broken up about his death. i didn't know if she was thinking about herself. i was trying very desperately to get her to let me come over to the house and sit with her and make sure she's okay.

whitney in true fashion, after me trying ten different times. listen, i'm a mother and i'm a woman and i'm single, and you're not coming over to my house in the middle of the night. in a way that only she could. but it's beyond tragic. and i was so disgusted. i must tell you i was so disgusted at the media and the way that they handled her death. it was so blatantly disrespectful. the paparazzi -- see, this is what i mean about fame and even in death. trying to get her, just her body from the morgue to the plane. >> because you supplied the plane, didn't you? >> i did. i did. and there was -- it was beyond awful. i tell you, we tried to send a hearse as a decoy. they found out we had the body in a van. and there are paparazzi 50 deep following the van.

i had them move the plane into the hangar and close the door, bring the van in. one person, one of the hired drivers is trying to take pictures of them putting her body on the plane. it was just beyond disrespectful for her family and everyone else. and i understand she was a superstar, but she didn't deserve to be treated that way in the media toward the end, you know? >> you knew dick clark for 40, 50 years. an absolute legend of the business. put him in context, historical context. how important was dick clark, do you think? >> he was a pioneer. you know, in the early days of television with "american bandstand," he revolutionized music on television as we pointed out earlier even before we went on. he had blacks and whites dance together. unheard of. a lot of young people watching would say, what? that's crazy. that was crazy then to put that on. risk taking. then he was involved in so many programs that the public didn't even know he --

>> here's the thing. i knew that you were responsible for this show alone before i came along for 7,000 shows. now dick clark apparently was responsible in all his guises for 7,500 hours of television. >> so many thing he touched, business manager, owned a radio network, quiz shows, radio talk shows. television talk shows. he produced donny and marie. you're going to have donny on. he produced their television show. >> if you could bottle the dick clark magic, what would you call it? what was the secret ingredient that he had? >> he was a great generalist. he could do anything. he was very, very good. you wouldn't go around quoting dick clark.

you know, there's no memorable great moments, but he was kind of every man. he was there. he entered the room well. the camera liked him. he was gentle, he was kind, he was smart. he was revolutionary in music. for example, even as he aged, most people get older, you and i -- i'm not saying you're old. we cannot name the billboard top ten. >> but he could. >> he could name it. i'm sure he could have named it yesterday. >> next, happier moments, big stars playing it for laughs. three of my funniest guests of the year. >> i want you to kiss my chubby fingers in the way you just did in that clip. oh, my god, this is the most erotic thing that's ever happened to me. >> you poor baby.

in my career i've gone head to head with world leaders, ceos, tech geniuses and holly woo superstars but you never know what you're going to get when you sit down with a comedian. >> what i like about you is you're a shameless plagiarist. you're taking "50 shades of gray" and you have "50 shades of chartreuse." >> first of all, you're not saying it right. >> i'm married to a woman born and raised in france. i know how to speak french. >> i'm speaking to put hash tag, this time it's personal.

i just wanted to rip off the title because i thought it was such a stupid book. >> have you read it? >> i read the first seven chapters. >> is there anything in there you haven't done yourself? >> i'm actually conservative but i'm not interested in that at all. are you? >> seriously. you surprise me. >> i don't want to get hit in bed. if you're going to hit me, do it out in the open. first of all, if someone does deserve to hit me, don't do it in bed. >> did you read the entire trilogy? >> it's unreadable. why do women want to read this? no offense to the author, she's made millions on it. it's one of most badly written books. >> why did you read that?

>> out of pure curiosity. >> i don't profess to be the most scholarly writer. my books, i at least think they're amusing to some degree. that was so poorly written and it was insulting to anyone's intelligence to read that. my friends who had suggested i read that, i e-mailed them and said you should be ashamed of yourselves for finishing this kind of book. it's a piece of trash. >> what i can't believe is the way you look because we all fell in love back in britain with fat, chubby ricky, the guy -- >> i was not fat. >> you were pretty fat. and you drank a lot of beer. >> you didn't tell me then, did you? people tell me you look fantastic. i keep throwing these trousers away.

another pair have shrunk, jane. >> you were the standard barer for the beer drinking, fish and chip eating guy. >> how much weight have you lost? >> not much at all. about 25 pounds. i've done it by working out. i still eat too much and drink too much but the next day i punish myself in the gym and i feel great. >> even your teeth look gleaming. >> i haven't done anything to them? >> nothing? >> i got some of those whitening things -- they made me gag. >> and you're clean. >> suddenly i'm disgusting and didn't clean my teeth. i had a few pounds. the beer helps. i wear black. i still do that.

>> what made you go on this vanity kick? >> it wasn't a vanity kick. it was a health kick. the truth was it was christmas, i was 48 a couple of christmases ago and i had 11 sausages and i sat there feeling ill. the number of times i said, jane,i'm having a heart attack, having a heart attack. and i thought, you know what, life is good and i don't want to blow it. i don't want to go hold on, just -- what? so -- >> by the way, it wasn't just me. the dashing feature in men's health, it says "how ricky gervais totally lost it. he went from chubby loser to bad act orator. his next act, losing the gut and gaining respect. >> yeah, that's good, isn't it? i'm glad i lived this long to get to comedic orator because

otherwise it would just be the death of a fat, useless chubby loser who never cleans his teeth and stinks, ricky gervais died today at the age of 48 through sausages. death by sausage. that's a prison term. cut that. >> one of my favorite bits of this whole album is when you get together with the doors. >> yes. >> you perform "reading rainbow" and apparently it gets completely out of hand. i'd like you to play out the show with "reading rainbow" with you as jim morrison. >> this is if the doors were to sing the theme song to "reading rainbow." we're just goofing off in my writers' room, we're just going like -- ♪ butterfly in the sky, i can go twice as high ♪

take a look, it's in a book, a reading rainbow ♪ a reading rainbow ♪ ♪ i can go anywhere, i can go anywhere ♪ friends who know, way to grow a reading rainbow ♪ a reading rainbow, yeah ♪ ♪ the indian in the cupboard, there's a monster at the end of this book ♪ good night moon, good night stars, good night air, good