and it should be not one more. >> well, that does it for us. we'll see you again at 11 p.m. for another edition of "ac360." the report, "love and death in paradise" starts right now. >> the following is a cnn special report. i recall it as being a relatively peaceful day. that evening we had dinner because we had never talked about guns. it never even occurred to me to think about that.

i got into bed first. i dropped off to sleep. and i opened my eyes because i heard him talking. and i saw the gun. he had it pointed at his head. i immediately reared up on my knees and lunged. i touched his hands. and i don't know exactly what happened. but what i do know is i did not shoot my husband. >> costa rica, the ultimate tropical paradise.

but with its tropical beauty and beaches, an american has fought for her freedom. fought the charge that she killed her husband john, on january 8th, 2010. her passport taken, unable to leave the country. trapped. she spoke with me while waiting to stand trial for a second time. was it murder? or suicide? prosecutors claimed ann is a cold blooded killer. ann is adamant she did not murder her husband. >> will be tried twice on the same charge. >> if there were any merit to this i could respect it. and i could have some sense of peace. >> peace ann bender has been seeking since she first moved to costa rica here with john.

they hoped to escape to this magic, but instead it would lead to a descend into madness. it was john and ann bender's unique refuge in the costa rican rain forest. their dream at first. >> i had never seen a place as beautiful as this. >> it is remote, with their one-of-a-kind 80,000 foot circular house. nicknamed the bender dome, which ann and john designed and built from scratch. >> we built it to take advantage of the incredible views. >> their goals? for themselves, a life of quiet isolation and purpose. a balm, to calm their inner demons. for the refuge?

help native wildlife and flowers return, by keeping the poachers off the thousands of acres. the benders shared their extraordinary home with lots of animals, nurturing and rehabilitating some, like the hawk, leo, and lily, the three-towed sloth. in the kitchen, ann showed me the sink that became lily's personal toilet. >> and she would grab this, and i would create like an infinity pool of water. >> wow. >> for ann, animals have long been important companions, says her brother, ken. >> so she developed that bond with animals at a very early age. >> ken and ann grew up in rio de

janei janeiro. >> what was your sister like? >> very popular in school, she hung out with the cool crowd definitely. >> outgoing and popular, but something was not quite right. >> when i was in my pre-teen, ten or 12. i knew something was weird. something was different. >> weird and different turned out to be early signs of what would later become serious mental illness. >> i didn't have any suicide attempts or anything like that until my 20s, that is when it really hit. >> ann would be diagnosed as bipolar. a condition characterized by episodes of severe mood swings. she says that might explain her making sometimes rather impulsive decisions like moving to virginia. >> one morning i woke up and i said i'm done with cities. i want to move to the country, i want to live in a log cabin.

>> virginia is where she would meet john, the man she would one day be accused of killing. >> and so when you first met him, what was your first impression? >> i knew, absolutely, right away. >> that very first meeting, ann tells john that she is bipolar. >> and he started telling me about his issues with mental illness in his own family and we started to talk about that. >> and about his own history with depression, which his parents say started at a young age. >> john would get depressed. not unfrequently. >> he would go through times of everything is going wrong, usually it got over quickly. >> they say that young john enjoyed nature, animals and. >> he got into minerals, almost immediately he saw in the minerals something that he could create and kind of make a profit on. >> john bender liked trading and was good at it. he was something of a numbers

whiz. and decided to use his math skill his in casinos. >> he started going to atlantic city. and card counting. and he did it until they kicked him out. it was a challenge. it was not for the money. it was the idea of being able to use your mind to create profitably. >> eventually, john would become a trader at the philadelphia stock exchange and work with and mentor pete delici. >> john did everything to an extreme. so if he believed in something or he felt that mathematically he had an edge, he would exploit that as big as he could. >> part of john's strategy was to have competitors on the trading floor underestimate him. >> he wore scrubs on the floor because he wanted people to think he was you know, a goof ball and didn't know what he was doing. >> but john did know what he was doing and became a

multi-millionaire. but wealth didn't necessarily bring happiness. >> i think he was a tortured genius. there were times when his depression would last for periods of weeks. >> john used his profits to move here at the farm. was he looking to escape people? >> i think he would. >> ann would move in with him two weeks after they met. he soon proposed. >> our wedding was the two of us, our families. >> it was the feeling they were at the same place with exactly the same goals and values. >> all they seemed to need and want was each other. >> neither of us liked having people around. >> so they went even farther away and deep into the remote costa rican rain forest, leaving

family and friends behind. >> and was he looking for the same tranquillity that you had in virginia? >> yes, oh very much so. >> next, the tranquillity is shattered. >> when john did not move they fired between his feet and held the gun under which up to his head. >> and a decline into depression, paranoia, and what ann claims were suicide motives. >> had i been in my right mind i would have behaved differently. , does your mouth often feel dry? a dry mouth can be a side effect of many medications but it can also lead to tooth decay and bad breath. that's why there's biotene. available as an oral rinse, toothpaste, spray or gel, biotene can provide soothing relief, and it helps keep your mouth healthy, too. remember, while your medication is doing you good, a dry mouth isn't.

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it happened in san yisidro, a short time from ann and john bender's refuge, in april of 2001. >> so we were driving around and john mentioned there was a car behind us that just keeps following us. we pulled into where we were going to go. i looked at john and said this is a kidnapping. he just sat down on the ground because he knew they wouldn't be able to move him. >> they were not kidnapping him, they were acting as muscle for a past business associate of john's. john and ann no longer felt safe in costa rica. >> the first thing we did is we left the country.

we went to canada. >> three months later they returned to their home in the rain forest. >> to come back, we had to be safe. so that is when we hired the private security. >> she and john also armed themselves. >> we both got gun permits. i never in a million years would have thought, and john said the same thing i can't believe i'm learning how to shoot a gun. both of us were very anti-gun. >> she said soon, their safety was threatened again. when their mountain top sanctuary was invaded in 2002 by armed men. >> and how far did they get onto the property? how close to you? >> they got within 15 feet of the corner of our house. >> ann says the security team scared off the intruders. she and john felt targeted. it was all quite unsettling for

two people trying to cope with mental health issues. on top of that, ann soon contracted lyme disease, an infection contracted by ticks. >> i have permanent nerve damage in my hands and feet. the infection passed the blood barrier so it is in my spinal cord and in my brain. >> it was 2002, the beginning of what would become an eight-year downward spiral for both of them. an unraveling that ended with john dead. >> he had severe depression, triggered by a particular bird he was taking care of. >> when a possum hiding in their kitchen killed wacker, john was

deserv devastated. >> he told me the day after, he said the house has betrayed me. >> paul myer has a tree farm next to the bender's property. >> i remember ann very well, beautiful woman, hair up in a pony tail, white tank top, tanned, okay, i'm living next to lara croft, tomb raider. >> myers remembers his last get-together in 2009. six months before a bullet would end john's life. >> ann didn't look good. she looked pale, like she had lost weight. both of them seemed sad or depressed. >> the last six to eight weeks i was not eating or drinking or bathing or doing anything to take care of myself. >> john began talking suicide. ann says she had to repeatedly take part in what she calls

dress rehearsarehearsals. >> we would gather all the pills in the house and put them on the table. and he would ask me what do i do with these? i had tried to commit suicide before myself. and so i would tell him this is what you do, but i could tell that doing these things would calm him down. and he would feel better. >> practicing suicide to calm him down. it seems an absurd notion. almost unbelievable. what about another extraordinary claim? that to get john through another day she would do anything, anything. including let him think he could cure her by injecting her with water gathered from a stream on their property. >> he was absolutely psychotic. >> he really believed this could help you? >> yes, absolutely. i knew that it was something that was allowing him to survive

another day. >> dr. vincent is ann's psychiatrist. >> i thought that they must have been both psychotic. >> and in that case they feed off each other's manic moments? >> yes. >> shared craziness. >> shared craziness, yeah. >> i know that there is definitely something to the concept of the two of us having gone mad together. >> ann was also physically deteriorating. she says at times she was too weak to walk. during this time, ann flew to the u.s. on a trip for their gems business. she says they had been buying and stockpiling precious stones as an investment. while she was gone, ann received a startling e-mail from an angry and despondent john. he wrote, i wish i were [ bleep ] dead, i deserve to

[ bleep ] die, i feel so utterly bad, i haven't felt this bad in years. >> i could read in the intensity of his words and in the conversation we had over the phone that he had passed over a certain line. that -- he had never passed it before. and i was terrified. >> two months later she sent an e-mail to john's parents telling them for the first time in 11 years we find ourselves in the unfortunate position of both being depressed at the same time. two days later, john was dead. coming up, was it murder? suicide or an accident? >> i heard that sound. i will never forget it. the rattling breath that i had read about, heard about. hanging out with my friends. e i have a great fit with my dentures.

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ann bender remembers all too well the joy before the madness of january 8th, 2010. here, inside her home, she took me up the elevator leading to her bedroom. the place where her husband died.

is it hard to come in here? >> it is still little hard. >> although she finds it hard to come here, ann takes me step by step to the final hours she and john spent here. how did you spend your last day? what did you and john do? >> i recall it as being a relatively peaceful day. he was much calmer. i was not feeling so much of the angst coming from him. we watched the sunset and did all the positive things that we always did. that evening we had dinner and then we played the video game we usually played. >> ann and john played the post-apocalypse game, killing super mutated creatures as a way to relax. >> i was feeling he was more at peace and so i was present for those moments, and i was not

quite as watchful as i had been before. >> so did you finish the video game and both come upstairs together? >> that night i was not able to walk so he would carry me to the elevator. >> ann says they followed their nightly routine. john turned out the lights and they got into bed. ann says she began to doze off. >> i was lying on my belly. face down. my head facing towards him. and i opened my eyes because i heard him talking. >> so what was he saying? >> he referred to my side where i had been in bed next to him, and he said something like, knowing how it feels to wake up with your spouse dead. >> although it was dark ann says that she could see that john had a gun pointed at his head. ann says she took action, almost

instinctively. >> i reared up on my knees, lunged towards him. and in the process of putting my hands around his, we fell towards each other. and he had the gun loaded and cocked ch cocked i know the way we felt towards each other. >> a single gunshot entered the back of john's head. ann would watch as her husband drifted away. >> i heard that sound. i'll never forget it. >> that rattling breath that i had read about, heard about.

>> ann said she walked around the side of the bed, held his hand and stroked his arm. >> as i was kneeling next to him all the blood started to fall through the mattress and was pooling at my feet. >> ann grabbed a radio and called for help. the head of the security was one of the first to respond. >> when you first arrived here at the house what did you see? >> john was in his bed. he was lying there lifeless. he was dead. i gave all of my attention to ann, who was very upset. she hugged me saying i tried to stop it. i tried to stop it but i could not. >> ann says she called her older brother, ken, to deliver the news. >> phone rang, i think it was

about 2:00 a.m. eastern time. >> i called him and i don't remember what i said. >> the first thing she said to me was he finally did it. >> the police arrived and began processing the scene. eventually, ann was taken to a police station. >> when i got there the first thing they did was test my hands for gun powder residue. and i remember they unbagged my hands and they were commenting about stuff that was underneath my fingernails. >> what did you tell police that night? >> what i remembered. >> did you ever tell them i did not shoot him. i did not kill him? >> yes. i said i didn't -- i said i lunged for the gun and the gun went off. >> after being questioned, ann was released.

pizzaro then urged her to go to the hospital because he said she was emotionally and physically frail. >> he said to me, you need to go to the hospital. and i argued with him. i said no, i want to go home. he said you need to go to the hospital. >> ann would spend the next six months at the hospital in san jose. coming up. >> the cause of death was homicide. >> prosecutors don't buy ann's story. >> ann intended or had planned to kill john bender that night of january 8th. 2010. four-wheel steering is why i get up in the morning. ♪ [ jim ] when my grandson grows up, it's his. but it's all mine now. [ male announcer ] that's how we run, and nothing runs like a deere.

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>> the gory scene of her husband's death earlier that day and years of struggling with mental illness had taken her toll on ann bender's mind and body. she was brought to this hospital in san jose. ann's long-time psychiatrist, dr. arturo vincent, was the first to see her. how would you describe her mental condition after john's

death? >> flat, is what we call it in the psychiatric business. a blank stare. >> ann's physician found her shockingly frail and thin, weighing only 66 pounds. >> ann was severely malnourished with pockets of pus on her skin. >> treating her would not be easy. >> she was in a trance-like state, not cooperating too much for her needs or how she was feeling. >> although ann was in no condition to communicate she says the police would not leave her alone. >> i do remember police officers coming into the room. and they were unnecessary. it was cruel. >> give me one example. >> having four police officers walking in with their weapons

and guns to make sure, i was still there. that was not necessary to do every day for two weeks. >> ann had plenty to be concerned about. the lead prosecutor, edgar ramirez says the evidence was pointing to murder. and ann's guilt. there was the single shot to the back of john's head, a spot, he says, makes ann's story impossible. >> the only wound mr. bender had had was located in the right occipital region, experience tells us when a person is going to commit suicide they will shoot themselves in a specific location, specifically here, here, and here. or directly to the heart. >> what about the position of john's body? >> the position of john bender's body when found shows he was in a fetal position, asleep, when shot.

>> no gun powder residue found on john's hands. >> the gun powder residue only appears on ann, in her hands and in her clothes. >> but forensic tests found no significant residue on ann's hands. and ann's attorney says the residue on her clothes does not prove she fired the gun. >> if someone shoots a firearm, the gun powder residue can end up coating another person's clothes. >> what would have been ann bender's motive for killing her husband? >> they were having problems because ann was frequently taking trips out of the country to buy precious stones and jewels. >> jewels found around the couple's mansion during the investigation. authorities removed them from the house by the suitcase load. >> we actually met.

>> ann says the gem business was not a source of contention. >> it was a collection we had always wanted to make. we both loved gems since we were young. to him it was a sound investment. >> not only was it a sound financial investment but ann says john bought her the stones also as a way to cope with their mental illnesses. >> whenever i was acutely ill, john always wanted to buy me stuff. so he started buying me at first, beads, a particular type of sapphire that changes color based on the light. >> john did more than surround ann with precious jewels, he also bought her hundreds of beautiful replicas of stained glass tiffany lamps. >> we both fell in love with

them. >> how much did you have? >> 550 of them. seeing the cloud production lit up with if tthif ththe tiffany. >> still beautiful outside, ann's house is now dark, cold and empty. empty because the police confiscated everything of value, including the colorful lamps she loved. even the kitchen appliances. >> two refrigerators and one industrial size freezer, two ranges, i had two, one with six burners, one with four. the refrigerator and stove top, why were those things taken? >> the money used to purchase those things may have come from illicit sources. i mean, in this case, we also found the benders had bank

accounts in tax havens like grand caymans, for example. >> an allegation of taxes, that they smuggled jewels. >> how do you feel about the allegations that you were involved in illegal activities? >> it is an absolute fabrication. we were doing nothing wrong. >> the prosecutor and ann seemed to agree on one thing. both believe mental illness led to john's death, but for different reasons. ramirez suspects ann had a psychotic break. >> both of them were bipolar and obviously had personality disorders. but in ann's case, she knew what she was doing and planned to kill him that night. >> ann blames john's death on his severe depression. >> three months before he died he was talking about killing himself every day.

every day. >> coming up, ann goes from suspected murderess to defendant. >> i was officially charged august 3rd of 2011. >> ann discovers her fortune may be gone. >> i'm absolutely broke. the day we rescued riley was a truly amazing day. he was a matted mess in a small cage. so that was our first task, was getting him to wellness. without angie's list, i don't know if we could have found all the services we needed for our riley. from contractors and doctors to dog sitters and landscapers, you can find it all on angie's list. we found riley at the shelter, and found everything he needed at angie's list. join today at angieslist.com honestly, the off-season isn't i've got a lot to do. that's why i got my surface. it's great for watching game film and drawing up plays. it's got onenote, so i can stay on top of my to-do list,

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i was in shock when i arrived at the hospital. >> ann bender's husband, john, was dead. and the enormous home they once shared in the rain forest was empty. >> the main reason i didn't live at the refuge initially was health reasons. here, i'm ten minutes away from the hospital. >> ann moved hours away to this small city apartment in san jose. although no longer confined to a hospital room she would soon discover her freedom had limits. ann surrendered her passport as prosecutors continue to investigate.

eventually they concluded she was responsible for john's death. >> i was officially charged august 3rd of 2011. >> so that is almost two years or 20 months later. >> 20 months after john's death. ann then hired the attorney to take over her defense. >> she was not satisfied with the attorneys that were representing her during that year and a half. >> ann had begun to question the honesty of the man who had hired the attorneys. >> something was wrong, but i did not what. >> alvarez had played an important role in the benders realizing their dream, helping them acquire dozens of properties that make up the refuge. he is also the man they turned to when they decided to funnel

most of their fortune, about $70 million, into a trust, which he established and controlled. >> the purpose of setting it up was to ensure that the refuge would have a structure that would protect it after we were gone. >> in the event of john dying first it was also meant to provide financial security for ann. but that is not how things went, according to milton jiminez, an alvarez employee who helped to manage the trust. >> after john bender died the first thing mr. alvarez did was take away ann's credit card. he declared himself the only heir of the trust, he said the trust no longer existed and now everything belonged to him. >> jiminez says she was so disturbed by what he calls alvarez's lying ways and soaring

ego that he left the company. >> i found out he had quit and i got in touch with him. he told me verbally some things and things fell together. >> jiminez had accused alvarez of stealing from the trust. >> almost around the same time the trust was created mr. alvarez began investing the funds in personal projects and paying for personal expenses. his life-style changed completely. >> ann sued alvarez for fraud and gained access to his files on the trust. the case is pending. from what you saw how much money do you estimate mr. alvarez stole from that trust? >> by the time i left the office i calculated $20 million. >> in the end, jiminez believes alvarez wanted ann put away so that he could get away with

embezzling millions. >> what he wanted most was for ann to go to jail. there is no way he wanted anything else. >> how has this affected you? what has been the impact? >> i am beyond upset in terms of the degree of betrayal and how long it was going on. >> you're basically broke, right? >> i'm absolutely broke. >> i requested that mr. alvarez be removed as a trustee. the court named a substitute to take his place. >> we've reached out to juan alvarez but he has declined to speak with cnn. in this e-mail he says he is following the advice of his attorneys in not giving us an interview. with the civil suit and potentially a criminal trial against alvarez in motion, ann still had her own criminal trial to worry about.

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i did not shoot my husband. you can tell me right here and right now, you did not kill him? >> i did not shoot my husband. i tried to stop him. >> on january 14th, 2013, three years after john bender's death, in a courtroom in san ysidro, koes sta reek ka, ann bender went on trial, charged with murdering her husband. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> her lawyer asked about her claim that she saw john holding a gun to his head. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> on cross-examination, ann

told the prosecutor that she had lost her grip on john's hands, started falling back and the gun went off. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> on the fifth day of trial, testimony ended and closing arguments began. the prosecutor demonstrated how easy it was to shoot the gun.

[ speaking in foreign language ] >> and he called john's death a cold-blooded killing. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> three judges would decide ann's fate. if found guilty, she faces a sentence of up to 25 years in prison but most likely she'd be committed to a mental institution instead. >> as soon as is the judges sat and i was looking at them, i was just -- i waited and i remember now just being one solid, tensed

up muscle. >> before rendering their decision, the judges cited problems with the investigation. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> moments away from the verdict, ann says she never felt more alone in her life. >> fabio reached behind me and held my hand and i remember just being so grateful for that contact. [ speaking in foreign language ] >> because there is reasonable doubt, the judge's decision, not

guilty. the defense attorney fabio believes this john bender e-mail was key to ann's acquittal. >> translator: in an e-mail john sent ann months before he passed away said he wanted to kill himself and everyone around him after discovering issues with his finances. >> issues like getting money from the man who managed the bender's financial trust. john wrote, i am such a total [ bleep ] loser forever getting involved with the total scum bags. for ann, the verdict was relief and vindication. >> you must have thought it was over. >> yeah, i thought it was over. >> but it wasn't. in koes sta reek ka, such a verdict can be appealed so a defendant can be tried twice for the same crime. and that's what prosecutor edgar

r ramirez did. >> why did your office appeal the decision and on what basis? >> the decision took us by surprise and after analyzing it, we did not agree with the court's assessment of the evidence. >> prosecutors won their appeal and a new trial got under way this month. >> it was devastating to know that i have to go through this again. this is a travesty in terms of the use of the justice system. >> friends and family, including john's parents, do not believe his death was premeditated murder. >> absolutely not. >> oh, it is just so impossible. the moon could be made of green cheese, actually, before something like that. not only did ann not have a motive to kill him, i know she could not benefit from his death. >> months before ann would learn her fate, i asked about her

future. if you are again acquitted at the retrial and it ends there -- >> yes. >> -- what do you want to do with the rest of your life? where do you go from here? >> i know what john wanted me to do with the refuge and a lot of that will depend on the resources that are left. he wanted me to start helping people and create the refuge and retreats for people with mental illnesses. >> what do you want for you? >> i want peace for john. because i know he's not at peace now. >> john bender's ashes are in an urn at what ann says was his favorite view, a refuge that she's trying to save, a paradise that will never be the same.

tomorrow is the day of retribution. the day in which i will have my revenge against humanity. >> my kid died because nobody responded to what occurred at sandy hook. >> the anguish of parents. good evening, everyone. this is cnn tonight. i'm don lemon. as the uc santa barbara community mourns, six young people slaughtered on friday, america asks what can we do to stop another dangerous loner from going on a rampage. tonight we want to know what you think. tweet us