>> ugh, i don't know. i mean -- [ laughter ] >> they didn't say anything? >> didn't matter to me. >> i remember growing up, and i knew that you had been married to him, but i only knew that he was the guy who shook mickey mouse's hand. i think that a lot of people can't understand how -- >> i nknow. >> how you would have been attracted to him. >> and i mean, well, having coming from a man who used to beat me up, and kconstantly put me down, you know, to have this genius which he was think that i was extraordinary and wonderful, it just gave me a big lift, you know. >> together. quiet, please. quiet. >> i think that my mother admired his art tremendously. yeah. you know, i was born when he was

68. and so he lived to 95. and he was conducting and recording until he died. >> i wanted a father and so i married him. i got a father in a way. >> and so she looked into the possibilities and the fun of it. my mom told me a store i are about them traveling across the country driving with a trailer in the back. it doesn't sound like anything that they would do.

>> and we were together for 12 years. like this, we saw very few people, you know. i just wast at every concert backstage and helping him to get dressed and all of that. >> so you would travel with him? >> oh, yeah, yeah. >> it sounds like they had a good life together while they were together. >> but when the children came and he toured, i didn't go with him, but i stayed at home. but it was a kind of isolated life, and i was in my young 20s then, and it is difficult in a certain sense. so i had dodo come to live with us there. >> how was that? >> it was heaven. getting your mommy back. >> you met her? >> yeah. she was like the paintings that my mom did of her, and she was a

big person. and p big presence and very gentle and sweet and very obviously interested in us, and in mom, and -- >> i mean i think that sokowski loved stan, but he was not meant to be a father. he is not the type of person that you bond with, you know what i mean? >> i think that my mom always dreamed of having a little house and white picket fence and family and that kind of vision, and this is what she wanted her life to be, but in reality, she has a drive, and she has this determination to propel herself forward, and ha drive makes it impossible to have that white picket fence and that family life and to have, you know, a calm existence. >> well, i wanted to make my mark so to speak. and the most mark one can make

is to be an actress, because you get the most exposure. so i think that is a great part of my wanting to act. i also had a very subjective feeling that in each part i would find part of myself which would make me feel better about myself. >> one of the reasons that i think that they perhaps had disagreement is because he was a little bit discouraging of her doing acting. i think thatp perhaps he didn't think as high of an art as she was capable of. >> you know, he wrote me a letter and he said, don't let "vanityfare" fool you, because your real talent is your

paintin painting, and you should concentrate on that, and don't think that parties and people that you are seeing and social life and all of that is important. because it is not. >> a lot of people who had been through what you have went through early on would not have done something that was main th public eye. they might have retreated from the public eye. >> well, i did want to do that. because i have the same name as my mother, and i thought that if i could make something of my life it would sort of make her a wonderful mother, you know. it would reflect well on her. >> why was that important to you? >> she was my mother, you know. >> you said that you stopped communicating with her from the time, what, 20, to 38? >> yes. >> why did you stop communicate ing? >> because of stokowski. and so i thought that he was god

and i didn't give her any money at all. stokowsk ishg stokowski kept saying she never loved you. why would you do it? there was a terrible press about it in the papers and all of that that i was cutting my mother off without anything. >> and you nknow, darling, so many of us have always wondered why to choose the doll business to go into? >> well, you nknow, darling, evr ever since we were kids we liked to make doll faces, and those sort of thing, and with the way that income tax is these days, i think that everybody has to go to work, don't you? >> how right you are. >> thank you, everybody. good-bye. >> this goes way, way back. this is stan. this is when i was living in

greenwic greenwich. >> wow. 1952. >> yeah. >> it is a great picture. you were 28 here. >> just about to blow the coop. >> what do you mean? >> well, i knew that i was not going to stay married to leop d leopold. >> really? >> yes. that is when i met sinatra after i had done that play. ♪ two drifters off to see the world there's such a lot of world to see ♪ >> because sinatra was in love with me, and i could leave so to spe speak. i took my kids, and i walked out. and i was a able to do it. even though i did not for one minute believe that we would go swaying down the lane for the rest of our lives, i used it.

♪ my huckleberry friend ♪ moon river ♪ >> there was a custody trial. >> yes, and of course, stokowski never thought that i had the guts to fight it, ever. but i have got guts. and i won it. >> it was a bit of a strange atmospheres, because two different households and my mom and dad weren't real areally getting ale long very well at that time. >> was the divorce difficult for stan and chris? >> i think it was. i think it was because i didn't talk to them enough about it. >> sometimes when my mom described her relationship with her mother about how shep appeared sort of as a beautiful

figure sometimes, i remember feeling that with my mom, too. >> right. >> because she was busy doing lots of thing, and involved in, you know, theatrical pursuits and paintings, always there. i do remember that feeling of her being a little bit more distant than i would have wanted her to be. but i the think that is how her mother was to her, and that is a natural thing. >> right. >> and over the years, it has changed a lot, and we are able to talk about all of that. my brother is a year and half younger than me. chris likes his privacy. to a great degree. >> chris has dissociated himself from this world. he never wants to see any of us

again. and -- >> when is the last time that you heard from him? >> when he was 22. >> how old would he be mou? >> he is now in the late 50s. and it is, you know, it has been very hard for me to come to this conclusion, and part in my life, but i believe that is really what he wants. ♪ ♪ miller beer afoot and light-hearted i take to the open road. healthy, free, the world before me, the long brown path before me leading wherever i choose. the east and the west are mine.

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i like the density of this, too. >> yeah. that is oil pastel and the one of jco is chalk. it is different. >> oh. >> do you think they should put a border or matte? you think it would be better th thinner, too? >> i do. i mean, i definitely feel responsible for her, and i have felt that way since i was a little kid. i never viewed it as a parental relationship which may seem odd. >> but the spelling on the other one is spelled wrong. >> i noticed. >> but you don't realize it

until somebody told me, so i will leave it. spell i spelling is mot my -- [ laughter ] >> and i was always was very aware of her concerns and her needs and her strengths and her weaknesses. >> i like this. this is cool. i never really expected anything from her in terms of -- i don't know, just other than, you know, general support of and concern, i never really -- i don't know. i always thought that it was my responsibility to kind of watch after her. [ doorbell ] >> sorry. i was in the back. oh, sweat hearth, w -- sweethea.

i don't know if i am ready for the close-up. i did not expect the paparazzi or i would have put on my more important outer face. come in sweetheart. >> you what? >> i have made notes of all of the things they want to talk to you about. you know, when you are made up, you do sort of become someone different and it is like clothes that you wear, you become somebody different. when mere yum -- merriam is making me up, you will not recognize me when she is making me up. you will think it is a totally different person. it is sort of like pleasing her.

and then i get all dressed up and she says, you feel great. it makes me feel so successful. and you know, having, you know, grown up really with very low self-esteem, it is like i have achieved something. of course, i have achieved nothing at all, and so any way, you will see me totally as my inner person, okay. [ laughter ] more interesting? >> yes. divine. >> so those are it. >> and we will put these here. >> yes. >> i think that my mom has lived many lives and inhabited many skins and if you look at pictures of her through the ages, she looks like a

completely different person. to you remember when you started to be photographed? >> i started to be photographed for harper's bazaar when i was 15 and i just loved it. i did. i felt like a movie star. i felt girlie and beautiful. it was the firsts ti time they ma makeup on me, and which i loved. pancake makeup and lipstick. grown-up. ♪ ♪ the colors that she wear ♪ it is like a rainbow ♪ with the colors in the air ♪ everywhere she comes in

>> you are amazing. sit down, please. ♪ >> i am curious to see what her reflection is in the camera lenses. it is interesting the per s ini that she adapts for whoever the photographer was. >> gordon parks, and i really had no sense of my identity, and it just took me a long time to get it together. ♪ have you seen her dressed in blue ♪ ♪ and the sky in parts of you ♪ and her face is so fair ♪ and have you seen the lady blue ♪ ♪ she has color everywhere sfoid

she is like a rainbow ♪ >> nice. >> i remember the kids being at the photo shoots, and dressing up and i think that i lived my entire childhood as a costumes like sailor suit, and so that is how i felt today looking back on it, but i liked the military style and so i was in a different war outfits and uniforms and stuff. >> and then sometimes we would dress up in blackbird costumes orring something. i remember dick saying, start over there and i want you to run towards me really fast. that is one of the shoots where we were running towards him. >> meeting him changed my life. >> how? >> i met sidney laurent through

him. i never thought that i would get involved unless it was through work. and of course, sidney is perfect for that. >> and in the madness, he prayed for the storms, and prayed that storms would bring him piece. -- peace. >> and he used to draw thousands of drawings? >> he said that i pust love himment and he would do hundreds of them and sort of leave them. >> what does that say? >> i am so in love with you. >> i have always had a fear of abandonment, but it is sort of i will abandon you before you abandon me. that has been very much

something that is there, you know, which i have had to sort of fight against. we were married for seven years, and i felt very guilty, because he wanted children and i kept putting it off, because i wanted to act. then, he started saying you don't love me h enough. which possibly was true. i started feeling very badly about myself and guilty and then being angry at him for making me feel that way, things like that, you know. >> what is it? >> i can't stand another minute of the hypocrisy. >> and then we are through. >> i am, too. i have had it. i never want to see you again. >> suits me. >> and is that all you can say after all of our years together? >> no, there is one more thing,

darling. >> what is that? >> i am count iing on your vote >> and how did you meet my father? >> well, sidney and i went for d dinner at moreen mcgrath's and wyatt cooper was there, and he was an actor. >> wyatt, good luck tonight. >> he had become a screen wrwri when i met him. and he said that afterwards, he was imare pressed with me. and i was impressed with him, you nknow. otherwise, you wouldn't be here. >> and so, you were still married to sidney at the time? >> yes. >> my mom and sidney separated and divorced when i was about 12. that was difficult for me. of course. but on the other hand, i could see how happy my mom was. >> i had an awful lot to work

out in my life, and it took me years and years and years to work it out. but when i married wyatt, i knew it was for life. >> my dad wanted you to re-establish contact with your mom? >> yes. he was a great help in that. she then had something called hysterical blindness which you are not blind, but you psychologically something happens so that you can't see. i felt why was i afraid of this sad person, you know? who was so gentle. she was like a butterfly, you

know. >> when mom's mother for the first time i met her when i was 13 or 14, and just she visited and i thought to myself, wow, this is my grandmother and this is the first time i am meeting her. >> and so when she reconnected with her mother, that is when you met her for the first time. >> yes. >> and do you remember what she was like? >> formally dressed and prim, and slightly reserved. we didn't have much conversation. but i knew that it was an important event. >> we wept into my studio and we really didn't talk about anything except chitchat, you know. which of course i regret now. she died the day after carl was

born, and the last time i spoke to her on the phone was just a few hours after he was born, and of course, i wanted a girl, and i was going to tell her that i was going to call her gloria and i i almost was going the lie to her and tell her it was a girl because i knew that she was so ill, but i didn't. and when i told her, she said, oh, gloria, you are going to start a baseball team [ laughter ] those were her last words to me.

before i went to sleep, i thought, i am going to count all of the terrible regrets of my life, because mou i am able to face them. so i started to count my reegrets, you know. it was not easy. >> you don't want to go into them? >> well, my greatest regret is that i was not with dodo when she die d. when i left stokowski, there were things happening so, you know, and i kind of lost her again. but she never stopped writing. and then in the last letter i got which was type written, it was to say that she had died,

you know. >> where did she die or do you nknow when? >> with catholic charities. i regret that very much. she was with me when i was born and i would have liked to have been with her when she died, you know. ok, let me explain.

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♪ >> nothing is the way that we think it is going to be, really, never is ever. >> and one thing that she said to me that she never had a plan for her life which i find amazing. >> it is kind of like walking a tight rope all of the time, and then you have to stay on the tight rope so that you don't fall off. you know.

>> and so my dad brought something to the table that she had not experienced before. i mean he had a plan for what a family life was going to be like, and what they were going to be like as parents, and i think that it is a big part tof thep appeal for my mom. it is interest, because they could not have been from more different worlds. my dad came from the relatively poor family in mississippi. had two parents for most of his childhood and brothers and sisters and had family reunions and relatives were all around. >> and you are listening to wyatt cooper reminiscing about life within the large rural southern family. >> these were joyous occasions for me and to see all of the colorful people gathered in holiday mood with the jokes and the laughter and the familiarity with each other was exciting a thing that i knew, and they belonged to me and we had chams on each other. >> it is scary in a way, because i am a loner, be by i had to learn to belong to a family. >> wyatt brought that kind of

ge gentle feeling of family, and they were having their kids. so, i did feel a little bit like it was a new generation [ laughter ] which it was. now i was 16 when anderson was born. there was not enough time real lu for us to all be together. and so it felt like two different families in a lot of way ways. >> i think that my dad helped my mom learn what a parent was supposed to be and learn what a relationship with children could be like. >> when you were born i was sure it was a girl. >> you really warranted a girl? >> ah! i was meant to have daughters. >> i won't take it personally. >> there was a fertility drug then illegal to get in the

united states, and i went to charlie's in switzerland and a friend from rome brought it there and we strapped it. >> and charlie chaplan helped to strap drugs to your body? >> yes. >> and suddenly, for the first time i had a family really. >> there was a conscious decision for you and dad to include in some things? >> well, it never occurred to me that you wouldn't, because you were included in everything from the beginning. >> i think that we can involve our children much more in our own lives. if somebody is coming over, my kids meet them and talk with them, and then i encourage them to express opinions afterwards about the adults, because one of the things that is so beneficial in the extended family is that

there was such diversity. and there is the family drunk. and there's the uncle who is very rich. and then the one who is always poor. so you learn that there are many kinds of people in the world. >> truman capote and charlie chaplin came, and people that i saw on television and movies and we were always sitting next to the people. we were to make conversation and considered on equal par with everybody else. and the letter was to my brother and i, and i think that he wrote it because he didn't know if he would be around, and he wanted there to be something that my brother and i could read and go to as we got older and sort of hear his voice. >> i see myself in my two sons, and in their youth, their promise, their possibilities. i hear those tender and stalwart

little men asking the questions i asked and am still asking. >> i didn't know that my dad was sick but i remember one incident where he was lifting some bags, and my mom was annoyed that we weren't helping him to lift the bags and it is the first indication that i got that there was some sort of physical thing. he had had a heart attack, and heart disease was in his family, but it was not until i was 10 and right before christmas, and so it had been december of '77 that he went to the hospital. i -- at the time i don't know but they had a rule that kids were not allowed to go to the icu to visit, but at some point we were snuck in, because somebody realized that things were not going well, and i remember seeing him once in the hospital, and i hated to see him like that. i remember sort of hated seeing him in a weakened state. >> he said to me that he would like to be buried in, you know,

where my family was buried, because it is me in new york, and you could go to visit him at the grave. and i said, you are not going to die. i mean, i was just -- it was just an inconceivable, you know, i mean, i said, you are not going to die. and he said, i'm not, as if i knew something that he didn't know. i said, no, you are not going to die. >> and, and then it was only five days after january 5th, the new year that he died. >> we are gathered here today as the family and friends of wyatt cooper to pay our respects in this way to the life in which he lived. to the all of us who count ourselves among his closest friends and loved ones, who will

always be appreciative of the love, the understanding and all that gloria brought to his life with the sons and with the beauty of home and the magnificent world on the outside. it was here that the family became his magnificent obsession. >> i'll tell you that we used to really go crazy for christmas. and then wyatt died on january 5th, and from then on, we never

had a tree or anything, and so we have never sort of done anything since. >> i was 10 years old and so i don't think that it had any reality to me, but i just felt like over a relatively short course of time i had changed. i think that i got a lot quieter, or just less, and the person i was before that was a lot more interesting and a lot more outgoing and funny and more compelling character than i am now or that i became. i didn't want there to be more surprises down the road. i wanted to be able to take care of the people in my circle. i wanted to be able to take care of my mom, and my nurse and my brother, and so i started the only, and i mean, i was 11 or something by then and i think that i got a job as a child model.

and then i remember soon after my dad died seeing some, i think that it is a jacques cousteau special that if sharks stop moving forward that that they die, because they can't breathe without forcing through their gills by the forward motion. that notion has always really resonated with me. the need to continue to move forward and to continue to breathe. >> i do think the point of view that it is only once that you accept that life is a tragedy that you can start to live. i do believe that. >> did you worry about being a single mother? >> i didn't really think of ever getting married again.

i thought that i could kind of do it on my own, you know. and very soon after that, the whole jeans thing started, and so i was sort of thrown into, i was really occupied all of the time. >> gloria, you are terrific. >> yeah, they don't cut or pinch anywhere. >> what makes them this comfortable? >> they are my new stretch den nim jeans and they are a pleasure to wear. >> my brother and i would have a game to see how many times we saw her name on somebody's bottom throughout the day. >> she put her name on blue jeans. that is pretty brave [ laughter ] and i don't think that it pleased everybody. >> what would the commodore have to say? think about his name on some young girl's bottom, i guess? >> well, well, i think that he would be so dazzled and so impressed at my success in the world of business.

>> this is gloria vanderbilt, the woman who invented designer jeans and almost overnight changed the way that america dresses. >> the big realization for me in the past years is my mom which i had never ever thought of before, and i grew up my entire life thinking that i was a lot like my dad, and i look very much like him sh, and now i reae that i am very much my mother's son. we are a lot alike in many ways. so people are sucked up under tragedy and loss and some people, it propels them forward. it certainly has my mom, and it certainly has with me. >> we have heard a little bit of the levee problem in the new orleans problem and any updates from the hurricane center from that? >> i just want to show you a shot from some of the people

from the town that some people have just driven by, a man holding up an american flag. well, umm, sorry, i am joined on the phone by -- i am joined by some parents -- >> it was a strange experience because suddenly i found myself in places that i had been with my dad as a kid. it ended up a restaurant in biloxi that had been flooded and i went there to do a story about it, and bob mahoney the yoowner came out, and he said, anderson, and welcome back, and i said, what do you mean and he said that you were here with your dad. >> you had just come from the water park, and you had a towel around you, and your daddy was right here. >> this is where i ate? >> yes, this is the room you ate in. >> and to me, it united the past and the present. it united the past with my dad and the present of what i do, and also it was all about loss. everything was about loss.

we like to think, you know, we have moved beyond things or g gotten over thing, and i think that it is all still there. i have always thought that i wanted kids, but i also realize my limitations. i need sort of time many in my head, and i don't know that you can have that when you are a parent. so i would also have to change my career totally. i would want to be the kind of dad that my dad was, so, i definitely don't feel as much as i used to feel like i are really, really want to have kids. i think that a part of it is realizing how much like my mom u i am. and if you are never content and you have that restlessness and that drive, that is a tough thing to incorporate with kids and a family.

i just always remember my mom having this kind of a look behind her eyes. it was almost kind of like a far away look. i mean, it is one of the real are areally -- i don't know, there is something about it. it is -- i mean, it is very sad to me that -- that of all of the things that she sort of wanted or so in some ways so simple. ♪

♪ if you've got the time welcome to the high life. ♪ we've got the beer ♪ miller beer

♪ what do you want to say about carter? >> about who?

>> carter. >> oh, darling. well, he's always with me. you know? you know, when he died, i went to bed for about, i don't know, three weeks. and all i did was cry. and i haven't cried since. it's like there's not a tear left. >> his honor gloria vanderbilt under a doctor's care today following apparent suicide of her son carter cooper.

jumped from the terrace of the penthouse, gloria vanderbilt witnessed the suicide. left no note. 23 years old. >> my mom has told me this story, i don't know how many hundreds of times, exactly what happened in those final hours and minutes and seconds. but it still doesn't make sense to me. i always thought we were close. then i realized -- the fact he would kill himself in that way and i would have no indication whatsoever, tells me that in some ways we weren't that close. and i always imagined that we would become friends as adults. get through childhoods and meet up later on and reflect back on things. but -- i think my father's death

was harder on carter. and i completely didn't realize that at the time. he was two years older than i was, had even more mature relationship with my dad. i do realize now how hard that would have been on him. >> carter was made for joy. but he knew from losing his father that terrible things happen. and you can't prevent them from happening. we met at princeton. you know, i had a crush on him from afar. but the spring term of my senior year, we started spending time together. then the last few months i just remember carter's mood getting

darker. and i think it was because he had bad asthma. and he hated the medication. it made him speedy and sort of jagged. he eventually moved to washington. and that's when we sort of had a natural breaking off point. it was just a kind of a beautiful bitter sweet goodbye. i don't know, i don't know why i will always remember that he was wearing a slightly silly red flannel shirt and jeans. that was my last glimpse of him. >> i was on a crew team and had a crew race in new york. and he came to see it. and afterward we went back home

and for the first time ever seemed to be in some sort of a disturbed state. he was sleeping at my mom's house. he clearly had some sort of -- having some sort of emotional -- i don't know even how to describe it really. it was like he was scared. my mom was very concerned. and he started seeing a therapist right after that. i happened to run into him on the street in early july, i think 4th weekend. he said the last time i saw you i was like an animal. and i didn't even really know what to say. so surprised to just run into him. and i was so happy that he could make light about the way he had been. to me just seemed like okay he's making light about it, can't have been that serious. so i didn't even really -- i think -- i don't know what i even said in response. we ended up stopping and having -- went for lunch

together. and that was the last time i saw him. >> it was the night that dukakis give his acceptance speech of the democratic nomination. and i was with my sister and he was talking about jobs. >> jobs you can raise a family on. jobs you can build a future on, jobs you can count on. >> my sister said, jobs you hate. so i sort of giggled and called carter to tell him this funny line of my sister's. and he was very emotional. and i said what is it? and he started crying. he asked me if i would come over that night. and it's just awful to think about it now. but i had a pimple, like quite a large substantial one, and i just thought you know what, i

don't want to go. i love him, i'm still in love with him and don't want to go over with this pimple. i said why don't we get together tomorrow? >> that was one of the hottest days in the summer. and he didn't want the air conditioning on. so it was very hot. and i think he fell asleep. and i think he woke up. and i think he was totally disoriented. because i know when he came in to me, he was like what's going on, what's going on? he was daysed. and then he ran and i ran after, what is it carter? ran through the hall up the stairs and through your room and terrace door was open. and i ran after him. and when i got up there, he was sitting on the ledge with one

knee up and one knee down. he was looking down, you know. i was really very close behind him. i mean i -- and i said carter what are you doing? and he put his hand up -- i started to go towards him, he put his hand up to stop me. and i thought, you know, if i -- what i wanted to do was take him and grab one arm and grab him off but i thought that might send him over you know. and then i started getting down on my knees. don't, don't, get up. so i got up. and then he started looking up at the sky. and there were planes coming over. he looked at one and it was kind of like it was a signal. and then he jumped. and he hung on to the ledge,

hanging down. and i said carter come back. and then he just let go. and it all happened like that. ♪ >> it's crazy to me that i've lived longer without him than i lived with him. there are moments that still hits me like a punch in the gut and i literally get vertigo or nausea. i still cannot believe the way he died. i cannot believe it.

how did you survive? >> i just cried and cried and cried and cried. and cried and cried and cried. >> you know, i think my mom early on -- and maybe still to this day -- doesn't refer to it so much as a suicide. she has the impression i think like lot of people do that term suicide implies some kind offin tent, this was act. i don't know if he knew what he was doing and wanted to end his life. i believe he had some impulse, perhaps had it before, or some overwhelming fear or whatever it was. >> just unbearable loss. and a crazy