even if they don't have trauma, they need a sexual healing just to love their own bodies, and have sex be that next level of being more beautiful and more connected. >> anthony: i have a block of cheese in my colon the size of a grapefruit. >> eric: tony, come on, don't be grumpy. >> anthony: son of a bitch. >> eric: sometimes i don't understand you. >> anthony: i'm so hung-over i just want to crawl into the bushes and die. >> eric: seriously? >> anthony: no, i hate this. are we there yet? >> eric: no, the chalet is maybe, like, i don't know, a half hour, okay. it's amazing. >> anthony: worst episode ever.

♪ i took a walk through this beautiful world ♪ ♪ felt the cool rain on my shoulder ♪ ♪ found something good in this beautiful world ♪ ♪ i felt the rain getting colder ♪ ♪ sha, la, la, la, la, ♪ sha, la, la, la, la, la ♪ sha, la, la, la, la ♪ sha, la, la, la, la, la ♪ >> anthony: the french alps. lovely italians on one side, but the terrifying swiss on the other.

they're close, too close for me, a a man with an nuerotic childhood fear of alpine vistas, yodeling, even cheese with holes in it. but my friend eric requires payback. i have in recent adventures with him been unkind. he grew up in mountains like this. he's an expert skier. this is like home to him. so i thought it was only fair that he get a chance at payback. i am not a graceful skier. but i am an enthusiastic one. and that's what you come here for in winter and early spring. some of the best slopes on earth. also cheese apparently, lots of cheese. >> ski shop worker: i just take your size. >> anthony: yes. >> ski shop worker: okay, bend your knees. what do you think? >> anthony: yeah, they feel good. they feel good.

>> ski shop worker: feel good? >> anthony: yeah. you learned to ski in, what, in the pyrenees, right? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: i learned to ski in new jersey. >> eric: ahh, it's the same. >> anthony: yeah, that's what i us to say. >> eric: you thought you were going to the moon or what? >> anthony: hey, warm feet are important. nothing is more demoralizing than cold, wet feet. you'll be bitching in those things. >> eric: no, man. >> anthony: you'll look cool. those things are going to be like sponges. >> eric: you wish me bad luck. >> anthony: no, i don't. i just think you should have proper footwear, man. proper preparation prevents piss poor performance. ski log, day one, conditions are not ideal. it's thick powder and zero visibility. plus, i haven't skied in years. so it hurts bad.

but god bless the french, they can't go to long, not even down a mountain, without eating well. >> anthony: i gotta tell you, i'm not impressed with my performance on that hill. i was dying. >> eric: today is challenging. i mean, look, it's about three feet of fresh snow. the visibility was okay, barely okay. >> anthony: a year ago at this time i was a killing machine. now i was like, i was seeing stars. >> eric: no, it's the altitude. ♪ ♪ [ speaking french ] >> anthony: and some extravagantly fantastic red wine. >> eric: we blow up the budget. >> anthony: kill 'em. >> eric: kill it? >> anthony: kill 'em. >> eric: okay, okay, hold on. >> anthony: definitely the '66 latour. how much is it? is it expensive enough? >> eric: yeah.

they're gonna love you. >> anthony: we deserve it. oh, that's good. >> eric: right, this is good, huh. >> anthony: well worth the expense to someone else. >> eric: this is the beginning. we are going to have a week of good food, good wine and some ski, right? >> anthony: so what is the specialty of the region? >> eric: so they do the raclette. >> anthony: cheese. >> eric: you know, like -- yeah cheese. >> anthony: right. >> eric: the fondue. >> anthony: that's cheese. >> eric: tartiflette. >> anthony: that's cheese. >> eric: i don't know. >> anthony: that's not bad. i like cheese. >> eric: i like stews. they make a lot of stews, too. >> anthony: yeah, of what animals? >> eric: mostly beef. >> anthony: yeah? a lot of cows up here? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: i like cows, to eat. >> eric: yeah, to eat, of course. >> anthony: i don't much like them personally. ♪ where i learned to ski, we're lucky to get lukewarm chicken fingers and a bud light at the lodge. here we start with pan seared fois gras.

>> anthony: wow. >> eric: that's fancy, huh? >> anthony: all right. >> eric: i mean, where do you eat that on a ski slope? seriously. >> anthony: for the main, a loin of veal gently seared and pan roasted. joined by a wild mushroom sauce and a pretty little medley of vegetables. >> eric: whoa. >> anthony: looking good. >> eric: how is it? >> anthony: it's really good. it's also -- i just wanted you to know, this is humanely raised meal, free range, died in its sleep. >> eric: i disagree with that, but i will eat it. >> anthony: i'm just trying to make you feel better about the world. i'm all over the cheese course like a one man army. tomme de chevre, tomme de savoie au piment, fromage de chevre frais, et cremeux des reines. that's from, like, a cow. >> anthony: everybody has blood on their hands, eric. everybody. >> eric: i do too. >> anthony: right, we all do. >> eric: i do too. >> anthony: the clothes we wear, and the air we breathe. everything we do is built on the cks of suffering people and dying animals. >> eric: i agree.

>> anthony: we wallow in blood. ♪ ♪ >> anthony: ski log, day two. yesterday chef ripert showed no mercy on the mountain. today conditions are more to my liking. a small wager might have been made. loser might have to eat at johnny rockets. today it is on. >> anthony: ready? >> eric: yeah, >> anthony: one, two, three. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> anthony: the title of your biography, for your biopic, "32 yolks of revenge, or whatever we're calling it. "64 yolks," or, "for a few yolks more." no, that'll be the sequel. "a fist full of yolks." okay, that's what we'll call it. we have to change it to a more manly title.

"32 yolks" is -- >> eric: now it's becoming your book. >> anthony: welcome to hollywood, my friend. le cremerie. a special place at the bottom of the mountain. croute with morel and cream, lots of cream. i didn't expect that. that's really good. >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: i mean bread and mushrooms, and cheese. there's no meat in this. >> eric: no, there's no meat. >> anthony: i'm practically like gandhi at this point. >> eric: i'm not drastic. i'm not saying don't eat meat and become a vegan. i'm saying let's eat less meat. >> anthony: you just think it's better for the planet? >> eric: it's good for the planet. itd 's gooour bodies. >> anthony: i'll stand out of le bernadin and i'll tell all your customers that. you know this fish thing? you should really eat some vegetables.

bovine flatulence is a major source of carbon dioxide. >> eric: yes, it's the biggest one in the world. >> anthony: no, not the biggest one in the world. bovine flatulence? >> eric: yes, bigger than cars, bigger than anything else. >> anthony: see, this is why we should eat meat. we're saving the planet. we got to kill these things. they're ripping hole in the ozone layer. plus it stinks. >> eric: your are a lost case. [ speaking french ] >> anthony: what did she say? >> eric: she said she hopes you're very hungry because what's coming is serious. >> anthony: farcon. i think that means cannonball of goodness in french because it's a big, heavy, albeit thoroughly delicious, loaf of potato, bacon, dried fruit, and cream slowly steamed in a bain marie.

this meal is a foreshadowing of the kind of light spa food that will become a regular feature of our time in the alps. >> anthony: whoa. >> eric: we have to finish that. >> anthony: it's like a volcano. look at this. >> eric: you can put dried apricots oplums as well so it's a bit sweet and salty. >> anthony: it's very good. >> eric: it's really good. >> anthony: if you put that on "man v. food," food wins. can eric ripert eat the entire farcon in one hour? if you could save the world, could you eat that? no, if you could save a puppy, would you eat that? >> eric: to save a puppy? >> anthony: the whole thing. you'd eat the whole thing to save a puppy? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: get me a puppy.

you're watching my journey through the french alps, but don't stop there. go to partsunknown.com and become part of the adventure. retrace my footsteps. see what happens on my search to find the perfect dish in jakarta.

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>> anthony: ah, nature, the rustic charms of the farm. proximity to ones ingredients, the smell of fresh grass, manure, livestock. i love it. no, actually, that's eric. >> eric: it's true. >> anthony: i didn't mean to be presumptuous, but last night after dinner, i went back to my room and i whipped up a little pate for us. >> eric: yes, of course. >> anthony: the croute came out pretty well, don't you think? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: i mean, not bad for a little microwave in my room. because i know you're a man for expensive taste, i foraged for truffles this morning. i rented a truffle seeking pig and he managed to dig this guy up. perhaps you want to do the honors. >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: wow, look at that knife work. you should be a chef. a nice cheese selection from this very farm. a process that we will be helping along today.

>> eric: i'm excited about this. this is an experience. i mean, everything is an experience today. >> anthony: so is a colonoscopy, but -- so have you ever milked a cow before? >> eric: i love going to the farm. when i was a kid, they had 20 cows. >> anthony: in the farming community in which you grew up, did kids at school ever brag about sort of -- i don't know how to describe this for a family audience -- but inappropriate contact with farm animals? >> eric: no. >> anthony: really, never? >> eric: no. >> anthony: so if i made a grass smoothie and poured it on your crotch. i think that would be pretty funny. if no one was watching. >> eric: yeah, no one is watching. this scene is gone. this scene doesn't exist. >> anthony: don't do that while i'm milking you, man. >> eric: she's like -- >> anthony: the milking thing, i have some concerns. i'm afraid. >> eric: are you?

>> anthony: i'm a little afraid. i think they sense my jersey roots as opposed to your country ass, you know. they know you. they recognize you as one of theirs. >> eric: you don't like tony, huh? don't let him do it. kick him in the balls. [ mooing ] i'll give you $1,000 cash if you can get some milk out of this cow. >> anthony: you'll give me 1,000 bucks. okay, now we're talking, my friend. show me how it's done, farm boy. >> eric: he's going to show us. >> anthony: okay i can do that. >> eric: you see how he does? >> anthony: i think so. okay, you first. >> eric: okay. >> anthony: there you go. we should be playing some 70's music.

okay, save some for me. come one, man, that's my $1,000 going into that pail. >> eric: okay, your turn. >> anthony: all right, watch how it's done. geez, i'm terrified. >> eric: go ahead. >> anthony: oh, its soft. hey, what's that called? it's called $1,000, my friend. oh, that's strangely satisfying. [ mooing ] so, that's my grand. i feel like a champion. >> eric: you don't want to do a goat, huh? >> anthony: so to speak. >> eric: i mean, yes. >> anthony: i think we learned something here today. >> eric: yeah, do it quickly. ♪ ♪ >> anthony: cheese. don't get me wrong. i love cheese. i adore it. but it's day three of non-stop cheese, and we haven't even scratched the surface of the many wondrous specialties of the region.

hotel du buet has been around for many years. one comes here for the cheese. in this case, the iconic raclette and the equally iconic fondue. >> marie: hello, can i have a drink with you? >> anthony: please. marie anne chanel and her siblings are the third generation of her family to run this place. so this is a family business? >> marie: yes. >> anthony: for how many years? >> marie: soon 130 years. >> anthony: 130 years. so in the family the whole time? >> marie: yes, it's my great granddad. >> anthony: great grandfather. >> eric: so you will have to help us. >> mariell explain >> anthony: finally, raclette. i've been waiting for this. >> eric: i know. >> marie: would you like it directly on your potatoes? >> anthony: please, oh, it bubbles. >> marie: i cut with this part. >> anthony: oh, man, yeah, that's -- whoa. go ahead, go for it. >> eric: you want to try it?

>> anthony: no, go for it, big boy. all right, here we go. >> anthony: is there a future for him in the restaurant business? i'm not so sure. >> anthony: normal humans do not usually follow multiple wads of oozing cheese melted over potatoes with a molten pot of more cheese. >> anthony: so you're excited. finally, your fondue. >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: but we are no ordinary men. we are titans. we are centurions of dairy products. >> anthony: okay, let's do the fondue. >> marie: do some eights slowly. >> anthony: figure eight >> marie: eights, on the bottom. you touch the bottom. tony, tony, tony, like this. yes, yes. >> anthony: oh, man, that's good. >> marie: that's what i said the -- when you do that to the end of the fondue, the fondue is perfect. >> anthony: you should know he bet me $1,000 today that i could not milk a cow. >> marie: and you do? >> anthony: i did. victory.

look, i know what to do with a cow. >> eric: i know what you do you're going to. >> marie: you put in your fridge. >> anthony: exactly right. >> anthony: how could you do it? >> eric: how can i do what? >> anthony: to be surrounded by this much great cheese. >> eric: well, we ate about a pound of cheese each. >> anthony: you're going to have a big cannonball of crap lodged up your butt like a baby head. the size of a freaking baby head. you will understand the agony of delivery. >> eric: we are not leaving this table alone. >> anthony: we are, because there's a bunch of drunk, horny mountaineers coming in later. >> eric: are we going to party with them happily? >> anthony: no, because i believe there might be yodeling involved. ♪ ♪ oh, my god.

>> eric: i'm not worried about it. i'll be fine. >> anthony: whoa, whoa, whoa, watch this. okay, there goes the egg. >> anthony: oh, now we're getting serious. >> eric: sugar? >> marie: this is kirsch from haute-savoie. >> anthony: oh, man, that's good. >> marie: it's different, huh? >> anthony: totally. ♪ ♪ posting hashtag yeehaw. hashtag i have no signal and i still can't post out here. woah! look out, coming through. hey thomas. howdy there joy. see joy's got the new iphone with verizon unlimited. you bet i do. best phone, best network. america's largest, most reliable 4g lte network.

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>> eric: you do that to stay in shape, to enjoy nature. >> anthony: this is not a sport. >> eric: that's a sport, man. >> anthony: this is a death sentence. >> eric: we came from new york. look at the difference. it's so peaceful. >> anthony: you can go do this in central park. >> eric: yeah, you can go do that in central park, yeah. >> anthony: but why would you? >> eric: for fun. this is for fun. we're doing this for fun, tony. >> anthony: this is fun like chlamydia is fun. >> eric: we haven't even started to go up. okay, now that's the real exercise. >> anthony: oh -- hell. ♪ ♪ >> anthony: every chef needs a mentor. in the life and career of eric ripert it was

maurice guillouet who filled that role, who took a young, fresh faced cook from the mean streets of antibes and turned him into the hardened professional he is today. [ speaking french ]

[ speaking french ] >> anthony: they said they'd cook lunch, which sounded like a sweet deal considering what's on the menu. start with heaping spoons full of the finest osetra caviar. so when you worked for maurice, on a scale from one to ten, how good are -- >> maurice: minus two. >> anthony: minus two. and you only ended up in the kitchen because you were such a

shit waiter, right? >> eric: yeah, no, but i wanted to be in the kitchen. after graduation, i was in paris with my suitcase. i was 17 years old. and then i see that guy. >> anthony: maybe some asparagus upon which one nestles a poached egg. a freshly frothed zabaione and an obscenely generous pile of black truffle shavings. >> eric: i actually like a lot of zabaione. >> anthony: egg on egg, man. nothing beats it. it's ridiculous. i don't know why people mistake me for you. because they see us on tv together. we both have the white hair. and people can say, "oh, i love your restaurant. it's so good, le bernardin. le bernardin, i love your restaurant. it's great. the fish, it's wonderful." you know what i always say? i always say, "can you believe all the fish is frozen?" >> eric: no, he does, he's not joking. >> anthony: steak au poivre with

some fresh morel and new potatoes. >> anthony: so what was 32 yolks again? what was the -- that's a recipe? >> eric: for the hollandaise, for his hollandaise. >> anthony: 32 yolks. >> eric: yeah, to make the hollandaise for him. >> anthony: no, it's an excellent book. >> eric: thank you, tony. >> anthony: my favorite part is when you're in prison in the south of france. they force him to bite the heads off live chickens for the amusement of the other convicts. that was a good scene. or was that "midnight express"? i forget. >> eric: it was "midnight express." >> anthony: how many years have you guys worked together? >> eric: actually a long time. from day one of my career to when i left for america. >> maurice: a very long time. >> anthony: why did you go to america and leave your ancestral homeland? >>ric: robuchon sent me to america. i wanted to go to brazil. and he looked at me and smiled and said, "i can't send you to brazil. you're not going to cook anything there."

actually, robuchon helped me come to america, he found me the job. >> anthony: what would you have been if you'd failed as an aspiring chef? what was your fallback position? >> eric: i wanted to be a forest ranger. >> anthony: forest ranger? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: why? you like nature or something? >> eric: yeah. >> anthony: what was it, the uniform? you like the uniform? the shorts -- they get shorts and a little hat like smokey the bear. >> anthony: but you're not an outdoorsmen at all. you don't fish. >> eric: no, because i don't want to catch fish. >> anthony: we'll leave that where it is. you probably killed more fish over the telephone than -- >> maurice: good fishermen. >> eric: they are dead already. >> anthony: they killed them for you. >> eric: don't say that. >> anthony: you're like scarface. >> eric: don't say that or i'll give you a lot of salad.

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they can also kill you. so when shit gets bad and you find yourself a tangle of busted bones and torn flesh having slid off a lonely high altitude piste, it's people like laurent langoisseur of la compagnie du mont-blanc who come and save you. sonia poppoff works for peloton de gendarmerie de haute montagne. she's who you call when things are really bad. this was eric's life dream as a young man, to be a park ranger in the alps or in the mountains. this is what he wanted to do. >> eric: i wanted to do, yeah. i wanted to be you. >> anthony: let's face it. your career as a chef is coming to an end. you just turned 52. is it too late for him to start? oh, that's not a good sign. >> laurent: i don't know how to say it. >> anthony: it's a sorry pops. >> eric: i am in better shape than you to do it, that's for sure. >> anthony: yeah, i'm not doing it.

so what's the most common injury? >> sonia: so, a lot of knee and shoulders, dislocated shoulders. >> laurent: head injuries. >> anthony: concussions. >> laurent: concussions. >> anthony: i mean, i notice there is a bar here. how stupid do people get on the mountain? >> laurent: you would be very surprised. we see people not trained, not well equipped, following the ski tracks that get them to travesties, glaciers, crags. >> anthony: so if he drinks two bottles of genepi and he goes off piste and falls into a crevasse, dislocates his shoulder, breaks his knee. >> eric: why me? >> anthony: and has a concussion. this is a hypothetical question. so, okay, hypothermia is setting in.

your acl and your meniscus are both completely shredded and you're all messed up from a concussion, what is the thing i should do? should i ski to the bottom and talk to someone? i call my cell phone? first i call the production company and tell them we need somebody else for the rest of the show. >> eric: he's such a nice guy. >> laurent: to answer your question, there is something today we use more and more on people cell phones. >> eric: on, find my phone. >> anthony: find my corpse. >> laurent: we ask the people to go back on their phone and there is a gps inside it, and it tells us exactly where to find you. >> anthony: avalanches happen here, frequently. laurent and his rescue squads are here to prevent them before they occur if possible, and if not, to find you and dig you out. allow us to demonstrate. we bury our local contact, bullet, under the snow. search dogs, hopefully, will find him before he becomes a corp-sicle and our production insurance becomes unsustainably

expensive. so how common are avalanches? where are they most likely to happen? >> laurent: anywhere but the ski resorts. most of the avalanches that kills people is not into a ski resort, it's outside the boundaries. >> anthony: here's a question. >> eric: ugh, great. >> anthony: so eric comes back after he's recovered from his injuries, and he decides to go mountain climbing. and he gets drunk again. >> eric: something happens to me, you're going to remember, i tell you. >> anthony: and he climbs the mountain, and he gets buried in the avalanche, and he's buried in the snow. what happens then? what, do you just say, "see you in the summer"? >> laurent: well, first you have to find the location, the whole location. and then we have a transceiver

locator like this one, which is an example. >> sonia: something like that. >> laurent: and when you're caught in the avalanche, the rescue teams keep a tool working with the same one and then they can find a signal and then they start digging. >> anthony: how long can you live under the snow? >> sonia: you have three minutes, three minutes if you can press. but sometimes you have a little place for breathing and you can survive half an hour, one hours. >> anthony: so i shouldn't give up too soon. >> sonia: yes. ♪ ♪

>> anthony: so why did you choose such a dangerous and difficult area of medicine? i mean, you could have a nice practice in paris, you know, people have headaches. >> sonia: it's difficult to explain. yes, i know it's very dangerous, but i think i have to continue. i have to stop. i continue. >> laurent: i'm not sure why i do it, but i know it makes me alive, so -- >> eric: but you like it? >> laurent: i do like it.

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♪ >> anthony: le france, i love it, and god knows i love the cheese here. but a brief respite is needed from the torrent of dairy products. perhaps, i thought, a short hop across the border to italy would be a good idea. i want pasta. maison rosset has a long and storied history in the aosta valley. our host jean-marie christille grew up in the region. >> anthony: i love it here. i'm so happy to be in italy. i feel a little treacherous to deny my own roots because i have zero italian heritage. as far as i know zero. but i just love this lifestyle, this food. it's just great. >> eric: well, cheers. >> anthony: to italy. >> jean: after you. >> anthony: i will definitely have some of that.

>> jean: this is with -- even some honey. >> anthony: oh, interesting. >> jean: and this is a gift from me -- and i have done dried meat with the leg of the -- >> anthony: okay, more cheese. but it's a delicious order of gnocchi with beetroot fondue. >> anthony: this is great. we're doing fondue again. we should have a camera in your colon. >> anthony: ravioli with tomato sauce. >> jean: so you like pasta? >> anthony: oh, i love it. >> eric: he has been whining for a week. >> anthony: a creamy polenta with braised beef. ahh, now that's exciting. >> jean: one of the best you can find in aosta valley. >> eric: which meat is this one? >> jean: beef, it's beef. >> anthony: you remember our friend, the cow? >> eric: yes, yesterday. she was cute. did you see the connection between her and i yesterday? >> anthony: yeah, she had her

nose right in your crotch. so what is this game we're going to play today? >> jean: it's called fiolet. >> anthony: fiolet? this game is difficult to describe. i gather the idea is you try to hit that tiny polished stone with that stick as far as you can. i do not think i can do that. oh, man. i can't do that. he wants to hit it as far as he can. >> jean: it's a very simple game. >> anthony: this looks hard. >> eric: you have to lick the stone, so it sticks to the big stone. oh, this one is good. >> anthony: i tell you this, it's better than golf. >> jean: so you don't love golf?

>> anthony: i hate golf. >> eric: i want to try it. i want to do it one time. >> anthony: i bet you $1,000 you can't get it across the one. >> eric: i'm fine. i have nothing to lose. >> anthony: well, yeah, $1,000. oh, you're out, man. >> eric: no, three times. >> anthony: oh, geez. no, it's like watching a monkey try to work a typewriter. look, i don't even know what. >> eric: shh. silent please.

>> eric: viva italia! >> anthony: congratulations. no, no, man, it was a miracle and i'm proud of you. >> jean: congratulations. >> anthony: i think that's called a foul ball. >> i think that's called a foul ball. ♪ blue moon is a well-crafted belgian style wheat beer brewed with valencia orange peel for a refreshing taste that shines brighter. blue moon. t-mobile's unlimited now includes netflix on us. that's right. netflix on us. get 4 unlimited lines for just $40 bucks each.

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♪ >> oh, no. i don't no one has ever gone through? >> i'm telling you, would have more comfortable if i hadn't ate two portions of eggs. >> this is ♪ >> when you kill people in the film, you always have a catch phrase. like bang, dinner is served. >> i go like that? >> take them off. take them off. dinner is served. yeah. >> no, pretend i'm bleeding out on the ground. >> okay, okay, fine. put them off and then on. >> dinner is served.

>> dinner is served. >> put the sun glasses on. it's called acting. david caruso. jesus. in a world where the price of dinner could be price of dinner could be your life, one man, one chef, stands he just wanted he's back, in his own bone

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