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when we first walked into the country, heck, you had the weight of a nation on your shoulders. you know, we were america's response to the most catastrophic terrorist attack on u.s. soil ever. and for a lot of us, you know, we felt that we had a responsibility to the people that died to set the stage that you just don't do that to america and not pay the price. it was about not retribution, but it was about justice. >> what's that saying about who

will go, send me -- sir? >> as i say who will go and who shall i send? >> send me because i'm the dude that wants to make somebody pay for killing my brothers and sisters. >> i think we have to assume that there will be more attacks. >> the united states military has begun strikes. >> coalition war planes have free rein over afghanistan. >> the public, though, i think 94% of the public wants us to go in somewhere and do something. >> special forces known as the green berets. >> the green berets. >> inside afghanistan, these reports first appeared in

pakistani newspapers. >> known as the quiet professionals. >> so secretive we do not disclose even their first names. >> i never spoke out the way i felt like i should have. >> it was american green beret raid in the dark of night. >> starting to flail back and forth. >> pow, pow, pow. >> this is another type of warfare. war by guerrillas. >> unconventional warfare. >> to me it's like brotherhood. >> what is winning? you are just praying you'll get to prove yourself to your brothers. >> what began as a hundred day mission -- >> the longest war. >> -- war in american history. >> we've been living it for 15

years. >> i was 10, 1970, i guess. i saw john wayne and the green berets, and i thought, man, yeah. >> they all seem to think that because my dad joined that it was natural for me to join. but that wasn't the case. i went to go see a movie. >> funny thing. fella takes one of these into battle and carries a strange sense of guilt all the rest of his life. >> i figured everything else i've done in the army hadn't been all that hard for me. i figured how hard could it be.

it was pretty hard. [ laughter ] pretty good, yeah. ♪ >> the taliban must turn over osama bin laden and must destroy the terrorist camps. otherwise, there will be a consequence. >> a spokesman for the taliban denies afghanistan allowed bin laden to strike from its territory. >> good afternoon. on my orders, the united states military has begun strikes against a taliban regime in afghanistan. ♪

♪ ♪ >> i'm as close to these people as anyone in my own family and in some ways closer. these are my 11 best friends in the world. that's how i feel. >> no. >> this one.

>> this is us in afghanistan. >> i mean, and we were in, you know, some harsh -- >> we were probably in the extremest combat environment as you can fathom. it tested you in every way, physically, mentally, emotionally. >> we are it. when you need the army, we are the vanguard, the spearhead, the praetorian. >> 15 years. >> wow. since vietnam. >> yeah. >> we're talking about people, you know, as a unit we've been deployed doing some pretty crazy crap. wow. you get into a unit like this and that's what you do. that's your game. >> i've been in the military now 30 years. that mission was the pinnacle of my career. the absolutely finest thing a team of green berets could do.

>> mark wasn't on the team anymore at that time. so i thought i was good to go. i was 6 1/2 months pregnant. and we got a call. we were in a baby store shopping for things. i think mr. paul called him and said, guess what? you're back on the team. you know, like, oh. >> we both realized i was probably not going to be there for the birth of our child. on the drive back from nashville, then we realized we better pick a name. amy knew we were going to go, but she didn't know where. hell, i didn't know where we were going exactly.

[ helicopter blades ] >> ramp runs down a big cloud of that fine talcum powder dust. we come piling out of the back of that, haul all of your -- out. helicopter takes off. the dust kind of settles and out of the dust comes the sand people. >> that's right. >> you see a man with an ak who is dressed just like your enemy and you got to walk over to him and basically ask him, hey, how are you doing? and you have no idea whether he's going to say -- put out his hand and shake it or he's going to shoot you.

>> the taliban's army is some 30,000 fighters. born from the crucible of war. captured kabul in 1996 and imposed draconian laws. >> indiscriminate and brutal. >> whipped in public for adultery in front of an all-male audience. >> osama bin laden called for money and his fighters. [ chanting ] >> the northern alliance came together in mutual opposition to the taliban. >> general dustin and his advanced security party come riding up. >> gent dostum who has a fierce reputation for his treatment of prisoners. >> he jumps down off of the

horse. >> horse is still moving and he jumps off. the horse is like, hey. >> general dostum agreed to take my team members and i up to his former command post. >> i can't guarantee your safety. there are some people who are upset that the americans are here. >> so we would mount horses for the first time in combat. >> mark knows horses. he knew horses when he got there. we didn't. mark figured out real quick that if you go up to 400 dudes on a horse and say, somebody get off a horse and give it to an american, you ain't going to get a smooth horse. >> we got to general dostum's headquarters. my job at that point is to establish and maintain rapport. his plan that he had briefed to us was mazar-e sharif was the key to the country.

if we could liberate mazar-e shar to northern provinces, then the provinces could be liberated. from there haret, kandahar, islamabad. we represented fifth group. we recommended america's policy at the nasty pointy-end bloody end of that fight that we went in to help enable the possibility of a brighter future for the people of afghanistan. >> it was my first rodeo. we got married in april. he left in october. he was a medic. i thought it was safe.

yeah, he lied to me, guys. no, he didn't lie to me. he was a medic. >> every time they leave and they come back, they're a little bit different each time. >> a lot of memories. you know what i mean? you kind of tamp down and put away. not so good, but that's okay. every one of the husbands will tell you that they're going to die before us spouses do. >> i'll drink scotch. >> toast. >> there you go. >> we got chad. >> d.b. >> steve. >> bill, wherever you are. >> salute. >> salute. >> dear god in heaven. >> that's nay. >> what is this?

>> say hello. [ dog barking ] it wasn't until you were forced to retire you had to retire, then you isolated yourself from your family and everybody else. you internalize everything, you try to find a new normalcy. sit. sit. what i found kind of peace with was to go out here and crawl around on jeeps and be one again. being out here, i mean, listen,

you know. you get to have no thoughts at all. >> each one of our stories are almost similar how we isolated ourselves, our family, everything else. started reaching out and found, you know, the only way we're all going to heal each other is to get back together. >> holy -- >> is that bloopers? marky mark. go. >> marky mark. >> i'm up here somewhere. that's me right there.

>> you know, special forces you have a team and a team is 12 men. you got a captain and a team sergeant, a team warrant officer, two engineers, two como, two medics, and that formulates a team. each team would have a specialty, like high altitude, low opening, jumping or scuba diving or assaulting. >> i was the greatest tactician for direct action that there was. back then i thought i was on top of the world. >> again on special forces, can you give us a sense of how the size and scope of their mission will expand in the next month from classic liaison and reconnaissance to more direct action shoot 'em up ambush type of situations? >> a short answer, and that is that one should not assume that there has not been strategic

reconnaissance and direct action activity. you would not expect me to tell you exactly what they're doing. >> evidence that another much more covert operation is well under way. >> these special forces are trying to hunt down suspected terrorists. >> the commandos go out and root out some of that infrastructure. >> the mission statement was to kill or capture senior al qaeda and taliban leadership. stop. insert name. stop. insert location. stop. at our level, there was a big map there, and the big map is synchronized by who's next? who's on first. then who's on first is a number and a pitcher. a little bit of background. >> into one room, total chaos, seven guys, machine guns,

you dodge the bullet, shooting people hand to hand. you run in the next room guys were shooting out the back of the window, one guy surrender. you go into the next room, bam. it was on, off, on, off, on, off, on, helicopter, home. [ explosions ] when i was a kid, i was forced to read homer's odyssey about a warrior king trying to come home and the family going through that situation. you don't really understand it because you don't have the maturity. now you're trying to find, you know, the subtleties and calmness of life. that right now is more valuable than a million dollars in the bank. cnn films brought to you by

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♪ as a leader you have to balance, you know, what's the mission, what are you trying to accomplish? the mission invariably is to put your soldiers in harms way. i think as an individual you want to see it, understand it, to be tested by it. but then as a leader you're so terrified of the thought of making bad decisions that get your soldiers killed. >> you need a very strong team ader. >> it's like a democracy. you've got to kind of, you

know -- there's strong wills, 12 strong wills. >> you're stuck with these bunch of guys and thrown into afghanistan. and it was just fun. yeah, it was awesome. [ helicopter blades ] >> you know we identified teheran code as the first step in our campaigns. and the goal was seize kandahar. i met hommed for the first time in the hallway. and it was just men trying to work with each other that didn't

have any time for bull [ bleep ]. >> he still had an uncanny ability to hold things together over there. i think it was around 3:00 in the morning or so the teams spotted a convoy of trucks heading north. so here are these f 18s flying over head, and they're calling for permission to engage. and that was when -- that was when the war really became real. there was just this moment where allan looks at me and says are they clear to engage, and like

everybody was somebody quiet. i mean i was -- i was going to authorize these f-18s to drop bombs on pickup trucks that were likely the enemy, but, you know, what if i was wrong? and it was the silence that always sticks with me. you know, are they clear to engage and suddenly all eyes were on me. i looked at allan and i said smoke 'em. and after i said the words i was like where did it come from, smoke 'em. i mean that's just not me. the thing we didn't realize is these trucks wuseren't the leadg edge of the convoy but the edge

of the convoy. maybe 1,000 taliban. >> so we're just kind of looking and we saw this glimmer. >> these guys were coming heavy. and we're talking 23 millimeter guns. 23 millimeters like that big. i mean it will -- it'll blow you. you'll be like mist. >> we'll tell the pilots where are those two trucks right there and the pilots will go that's it. that's everybody south of us. >> we were [ bleep ]. and ashida assured us, like, man, i'm on tune, i'm talking to these pilots. we're knocking them out. and he would just keep saying

clear them hot, clear them hot. and through the whole not we would just keep going further and further. and we bombed like a hundred vehicles through the whole night. >> i mean i don't know if we were high fiving and euphoric. it was just we were trying to live. >> i think for me the notion of fighting from a distance, of fighting with these air strikes, it didn't sit well with me. i mean it -- it almost promoted just the promiscuous use o military power. i don't know how to explain it. it's just -- i mean we would have died otherwise. there was no alternative. but something just didn't --

didn't feel quite right about it. i mean in the end we slaughtered them. and as they were retreating, we kept bombing them. i mean we wiped them out. but i didn't feel good about how we had to do it. i just felt like -- felt like i should have been looking the enemy in the eye before i killed them. >> we went down and we started doing battle damage assessment and counting, you know, destroyed vehicles. and, you know, in some of them there were still some charred bodies that were just -- >> they're traveling in these little toyota trucks and you jam as many guys in the back of the truck and as many guys in the front. there might be eight or nine people in a toyota truck. and there was, you know, hundreds of those trucks. >> i don't know how to describe it.

it was just -- it was just what it is. to be honest, i -- you're like initially kind of -- i don't want to say shocked. but you're seeing people that are literally burnt and charred to death. like whoa, wow. >> that was the first of any of that carnage that i had seen with my own two eyes. it really didn't bother me. it was just kind of gruesome, whatever. but you're the enemy and so it's okay. and that's kind of how you programmed it. if i don't do this to you, you're going to do it to me. and it's really that simple. ♪

>> one of the things, first thing out of their mouth, how many people you killed? i didn't know we were counting. i didn't know you were supposed to count. if you know how many people you've killed, it's probably not enough. >> it's not a scorecard. >> it's not a scorecard. >> you know it's -- >> and there's a difference between shooting somebody fa face-to-face and somebody from a distance and dropping a bomb. w w whoo hoo, hiv five. i can smell you the smell, how long it took them to bleed. some guys can't get rid of the

smell. the smell of a burning body is different than the smell of a burning tired. and when you walk by it you're like oh, [ bleep ]. >> i didn't just see smell, i tasted. i thought it hit my nose. but then i realized i didn't get hit by anything, why ma bleeding? and that smell on occasion will take me right back. that's the horror of it all. it's very personal.

>> i grew up with that strong american cowboy u.s. cavalry heritage. was probably on a horse before i could walk. you know, i'd studied u.s. and confederate cavalry commanders. we'd walked the battlefields of gettysburg and down through the tennessee campaign. it was not lost on me that here i am in the 21st century, and i'm leading a 19th century cavalry. >> one of the things about the sf guys, most of them are kind of rough and tumble guys to begin with.

>> and slide the bar the other way with that part -- no, just put that down first. >> the way i grew up in virginia, it's clannish. there were certain hollows and all these families lived up this one and that family lived up that one. and if you make all these enemies, there's more. to understand how travel people think is obviously going to hell. >> everyone of these leaders told us do not become portrayed as the invaders. you're here as liberators. that's what you said. because we were so few guys, we could actually portray that taliban were the foreign invaders, tack stanny taliban

that had come over, al-qaeda that had come over and hijacked these people's country. >> that is foreign taliban. the ones on the left. >> he's now raised this army. we're going to rise up across the northern provinces, and we're going to press for mazar, shareed. each was tanged to support an afghan commander. each of those cells is a 4 to 8 hour horse ride. >> it was hot, dusty, dirty riding the meanest, rankest, nastiest horse. >> i won one time, and i was like oh, my god, are you staying

on this thing? >> that horse was crossbred with a werewolf. >> the americans would get bucked off, the afghans would get bucked off and everybody would kind of cheer. that was another bonding experience. >> an extraordinary defense photo. >> what was the last time you saw u.s. personnel in combat? >> that's a tough mission. >> not i will i saw him on tv. yeah, that was kind of a give away. >> yeah, that's when i got the phone call at 2:00 in the morning. >> well, 2 and 2 still make 4. it was like where could they be? >> we couldn't talk about where

we were at or anything we were about to do. and coming from a skirmish, then i get a message something's wrong. call home. >> i had kia, and mitial, bless his heart, s she was on the phone trying to let him know i had delivered. but we didn't hear from him until i was discharged and at home several days later. >> there were some complications and the ob specialist said you're having this baby today. and it was over a month early. >> she said i had two hours to get my affairs in order, andi i was not to leave, i had to stay on the hospital grounds. >> and as i understand every one

of you were in the delivery room. >> what it's what you do. you do what you have to do to keep your house in order, keep your kids doing what they're supposed to be doing. and while they're doing what they do, you do what you have to do. and that's just the way we are. that's the way this group of liddies are. >> bounce back. you know they teach you that in the cue course, in ranger school. you have to bounce back. so i regrouped, took a deep breath and i'm back to go into battle. [ bats screeching ]

[ tent unzipping ] >> good morning. >> good morning, will. >> i wish we had that -- >> look in the broth and see. >> yeah, whatever. worth $7 a cup. >> i want to do something, man. >> you know there's going to be a fight. what are you going to do slap each other? there's a breaking of a wrist, a breaking of a finger that's on

yo you, there's a chilling of a nose off. >> we hit one of the compounds, and you could just tell right away that it was going to be a difficult hit. you had less than one hour from helicopter.ueft the because if you weren't on the helicopter in another ur, the would fly off for 24 hour, and you had to stay there. >> unlike you, we didn't have any afghani counter parts. we were out in bad guy country without no support. >> and we breached into the house, and it's all squishy and everything. we're walking around. by the time we realized they didn't have beds or furniture, they just piled rugs. so we're under night vision, could barely see anything. your eyes are going green. and on the floor you saw some movement.

a guy twice as big as me, we're looking, and all of a sudden we see two little hands come up from this blanket and lifts it over. and she sits up for a second, squeezes her eyes like this, and i'm like you don't want to say nothing because her dad could be in the next room. i've got kids. imagine your girl starts screaming. so all of a sudden he did. she started screaming and going nuts. and we're like -- >> yeah, be quiet. >> so i pick her up and she started screaming even more. one of the other rooms had caught fire. so now she's really. >> screaming going crazy. >> you could hear it on the radio. >> we were outside in a gunfight. >> i remember i had a baby ruth bar.

she doesn't know what candy is. she's screaming and turning and everything. i put it on my lips, i put it on her lips and she's like -- some other family members come out of the darkness. and i think it was donny at the time saying what are you doing? put the kid down. we're having a gunfight over here. we're on a mission to show drip coffee drinkers, it's time to wake up to keurig. wakey! wakey! rise and shine! oh my gosh! how are you? well watch this. i pop that in there. press brew. that's it. look how much coffee's in here? fresh coffee. so rich. i love it. that's why you should be a keurig man! full-bodied. are you sure you're describing the coffee and not me? do you wear this every day? everyday. i'd never take it off.

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i got the rest of my tattoo covered. >> did you really? >> wow. >> one of the big things about combat is being able to keep your emotion in check. a lot of people say that we don't have emotions anymore. well, maybe it's because we're good at controlling our emotions and not letting our emotions overtake everything else. >> because you suppressed all

those emotions so much and so long, you don't know what you're supposed to be happy for or sad for anymore. zero emotions across the board. i don't get overly happy, i don't get overly sad. i don't get overly excited. and it becomes a big burden for the family, too, because they don't know where i'm at. did i do a good thing, dad? of course, i love you. way to go. >> my name is bill howell, nice to meet you. yeah, i worked with jetsen. i'm a special forces guy. yes, sir.

look at that. september '02. >> to be able to do this and jessie is awesome. it's loud, you feel it. the engine was strong just like my father. in my head that emulates everything my father was and what i missed about him. >> i mean there's no way that anyone could ever replace his dad, but if each one of us can give him a little something of what jamey's not able to, then i believe we're doing our job as brothers.

♪ >> i would have never wanted to be my wife. i wouldn't have wanted to be one of my sons. back and forth, back and forth. not knowing if you're going to come home, someone else getting killed. what kind of father was i? i was young, very hard, very mean. it's the whole intimacy of family that i didn't have it when i was a green beret, because i was a good green

beret. did a lot of things wrong. good lord. and if i could, i'd do a lot of them different. i'd sure be a better father and a better husband. you know, just what can you do but try to learn and move forward, you know? ♪ >> i remember when my dad initially got his paperwork about how he's going to be the team sergeant of 574. and that was honestly my dad's biggest dream to be a team

sergeant. >> there's a real scorpion right there. >> he left and then it felt normal again in the sense that that's what he did. he would leave and go do his work, and we would all be here. go to school, and then he would come back in six or nine months and we woul see him again. >> this is the first letter i received for him. hello, sweetheart, today is the 31st of october. this has been hardest trip for me. i really didn't want to go, but i just didn't want to leave you and the kids. >> i never read it. i never read it.

>> his love for family extended to how he treated the team. it was an extension of his family. >> he was a good team sergeant. he was rather soft-spoken. he was like a big bear until you passed him off. and, you know, we didn't pass him off a lot. >> the anti-taliban forces appear to be closing in on the taliban strong hold. >> taliban's future began this . there were all these terrific indicators that we had the taliban scared. >> we go through a village and not even fire a shot. these guys would come out of the woodwork and you would be & uam

up. once they could see the force coming in, they were all about it. they wanted to be with you, they woonted wanted to get the taliban out. >> we were literally throwing aks in the back of suvs in stacks and piles. got a couple more guys just keep going. >> we had this mob of afghan fighters and we just had to move this mob down to canda har. >> that's when we coined the term, dubbed like an afghan convoy. >> i knew it was completely unrealistic when i went into the special forces that iebd given the kind of autonomy that holy shit here i have exactly the campaign i dreamed of. >> northern alliance command have moved their troops into areas close to --

>> fighting sin tense fying. >> we had greater maneuverability on horseback in that terrain than the taliban or al qaeda did. they're in armored vehicles and pickup trucks. they're tied to their fuel depots and so we were able to cut them off from reinforcement and cut them off from the troops. i probably rode 300 miles or more. i was determined i was going to ride that horse all the way into ma czar sharief. >> crossed over the river, the water was high enough that the horses actually started to float down the river. and of course we did not want to go for a swim. >> standing in the water, very cold water, water up to my waist, i just looked back, looked south, and then i just realized it was -- it was the

most unbelievable shot i had ever seen. it was a thousand riders on horseback. it was peaceful yet magnificent. >> ma sarry sharief has indeed been captured by the northern alliance. >> they perceived us as liberators. >> i didn't learn until later that they perceived my team asthma lockas, avenging angels with swords of lightning. >> all of the city is the biggest blow to the ruling taliban since the allied air strikes began 35 days ago. >> that was the pin acc he will of of what all soldiers train

for. >> i graduated from the university of nevada, las vegas, with an accounting degree. went to work for an accounting firm and determined that i did not oo like it at all and i said there's got to be more to life than balancing a checkbook.

>> don was the best officer in my battalion. he was also my operations officer. >> it was the opinion of our senior leadership in the pentagon that they wanted a lieutenant colonel, a more experienced officer on the ground in afghanistan, and so that's why we deployed. to the me, it was -- it was exciting. i mean, one day i'll tell my grandkids about it when i'm old and did crep i did and they'll go oh, sure, grandpa. >> you know, while left to our own devices we felt like we were able to get a lot done it was almost seeds of our own destruction because everything went so well. then we find out, you know, headquarters with 20 folks are going to come in.

>> i remember celebrating thanksgiving in pakistan and then we infilled the next night. >> well, once i got there i had a big meeting. getting coffee breath close with them and i explain it to them. >> i said, okay, here's the deal. this is the way it's been organized and directed, and we're soldiers so let's salute flagpole and get beyond the emotion of it. >> so the thing we had feared when this higher command comes in and starts giving us orders and we have to follow them, well, higher command came in and started giving us orders and we have to follow them. so somebody else is now controlling the fight. >> i meet captain air marine and master sergeant davis. >> i don't think they were real

happy. >> oh, god. i hate it. telling the story, just sucks. always sucks. but i've seen all the ways that the truth can be twisted and i couldn't let that happen. >> how are you? >> i don't know. i don't know.

>> the morning of the 5th things were done. >> 7:00 we started seeing people, oh, all right. then hey, what's going on, and then the mail. so we were reading mail and burning it as soon as you read it. >> on the 5th of december the targets were predominantly in

this area. we received intel from what we considered a very reliable source on where the taliban and al qaeda that were still resisting us on the other side of the bridge were. so i went to colonel fox. i said, sir, i'd like to start initiating some close air support, daytime close air support in this area. >> the hostilities were over, the taliban were coming to sur rend are, why was the battalion headquarters calling in an air strike to begin with? to me, it was pretty obviously a way to say that they'd engaged the enemy before the war ended. >> i don't know if the sun at this time just right, but we observed the opening of a cave. >> every air strike that we

directed was basically personally authorized by me. i explained it to fox and bull willdock. >> i'm a colonel, he's a captain, so both professional enough to know i'm giving the orders, you execute the orders. >> i was livid again trying to contain my anger that there fwhoos valwas no valid target to bomb there. >> he's a commander, he outranks you. he can do whatever he wants really. is it the most tactically proper waive doing things? no, not with us being there. >> we could have done nothing, but nothing was -- you know, i don't believe that was the proper course of action. we were just -- we were just trying to interdict them and drop enough ordnance on them to

make a statement and kind of ruin their day and get them to dislodge and go and retreat. >> b-52s overhead, they look back at me and say are we cleared to drop a 2,000 pound j tom on the cave opening? i say, yes. it's something that i'll take to my grave with me as, you know, should i have done something different. should i have done -- you some i have, you know, should i have just ignored this. >> when you call in an air strike, you have to be hypersensitive of all the things that could go wrong. you're talking about 2,000-pound bomb. >> i would give everything back, all the promotions, all the recognition, all the medals,

everything that i have, everything that i have for none of this to have ever have happened. >> all emotion and everything just kind of shut off for a little bit. and i remember this feeling, it was [ bleep ] you i'm not dead. >> the next thing i know is that my head's being driven into the dirt. >> magazine was blown apart over here, this is -- i didn't see anybody. i mean, you're focused right here. >> and i had blood and body parts, you know, various -- all over my uniform. >> i'm just sitting there look at myself and this thumb was touching the inside of my arm here. i'm like, oh, that's bad, as i

arched, as i had a big sucking chest wound all this blood starts blasting out of my shirt here. and i remember starting to kind of going into shock and i said, oh my god three times. so the last thing i thought was as i was looking at that the if i go face drown i'm gonna drown in this. so when i go out i gotta turn my head this way and that's the last thing i remem and i -- >>ou know, there's not a day i don't think about that whole event. i mean, we never found enough of master sergeant davis. we had to do dna analysis because the bomb hit exactly where he was standing.

>> our company sergeant major came in with the news that 574 had a bomb drop on their position and said j.d. and dano were kia. that was kind of a devastating moment. >> the 574 casualties hit me pretty hard. >> trying to figure out how i want to tell you this. >> these guys on your left and right and they will always be there no matter what. and to me, it's like

brotherhood. excuse me. >> i finally shut off for a minute and i just cried my eyes out. the first americans killed in afghanistan were killed by their own people. >> afghan fighters have de sertd the taliban. >> soldiers are now desserting in thundreds. >> ther they surrendered canda har that day. and i just need a minute here.

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in four short months our nation has begun to rebuild new york and the pentagon, rallied a great coalition. >> i was down there below on the floor of congress listening to the president give the evil empire speech which would end up being very defining speech for the next 14 years really. >> terrorist training camps, saved the people from starvation and freed a dprunt brutal oppression. >> what does victory feel like? i mean, it felt like we had done our jobs. i mean, as hind stiegt was the

mission we had trained for from the time we game into special forces. that was the mission. >> we had less than 100 guys, we top will the taliban and ran home. had 20,000 troops been bogged down ever since. >> i think we did make it look too easy. but, we didn't really have time to reflikt on that before we're invading iraq with the expectation that it would be over quickly. >> what we have found in afghanistan confirms that far from ending there our war against terror is only beginning. >> so when we chased bin laden out of afghanistan into pakistan, as far as the commander told us we have done our job, great job. we all but tied the bow on afghanistan at the time.

>> that same team, that same group of guys went to iraq. in less than 90 days we thought iraq was over too. >> yeah. >> we were having tea in baghdad. >> literally, eating in a restaurant. >> you're welcome. >> you're welcome. >> yeah. >> and here's your country. >> nine months later you come home again and you got a new mission. you just go in the vfw and you hear one guy had one tour you're like oh, wow put hear one guy had two towers. you're like he's a little crazy, you know what i mean. somebody had three towers they're out of their minds. >> yeah. >> and what you see now is, you know, people have five, seven, nine, ten tours and they're still going. >> me and scottie, scottie and i retired the same year and when i retired i just went home and i'm going to tell you this, 11 days after i retired i put my wife in

the hospital. i don't even know why, i just kinda freaked out. i'm not saying it's ptsd, i'm not saying it was anything. i don't even really remember what happened. it was just -- it's just like, you know, you go and do you things duand you do some stuff that's crazy. and then when you're done, they just tell you bye, you know. >> i just came back from afghanistan again and i had a deploumtd over there. this was my 20 6th deployment total. i had forgot to give him some stuff last night. >> how long i have known mark? for as long as i can remember.

probably since 3 or 4. i've known him for a long time. i usually know what he's thinking and sometimes he does me. yeah, but. >> amy's, you know, raised our family. you know, being a single, working momma jo the majority o year. >> i've had some trying times at home but i manage to get through it and then i yell at him later calling him this is what i had to deal with. >> it's just adapting, continuing to evolve and adapt to that new normal. maybe that's part of it is you keep turning up the heat a little couple degrees at a time over 26 deployments and then you're kind of at that -- that new normal. my tolerance level for bullshit

is kind of at its max and, you know -- i'd say that's maybe one thing, just lose some patience with myself or my family or -- >> when he comes home from deployments we try to bring everybody here to just be a family, hang out outside. but, yeah, 14 years. chia was born when he was in afghanistan. she's almost 14. >> plate. plate. i keep going back because i want to believe that we made a difference. you know, the ranger creed thing

instilled in us is readily displayed, carry on to the objective. though i'd be the lone survivor, i keep going back. >> i never did morning, it was like 2:00 in the morning i happened to be just up. and i see it on cnn, it goes two special forces soldier got killed. and i'm just thinking, oh, god, i hope it's nobody that i know. >> i was 13. yeah, i was at school. they called my name for dismissal to come to the office to be dismissed. and i went and the person

picking me up was someone who i had never thought would be picking me up. and we got in the car and we were driving home, i said well why are you picking me up? and he said, well your mom just wanted me to come get you, pick you up early. and i remember saying outloud to him, maybe my dad came home. i said maybe my dad's coming home today. >> i walked in the door and that's when i saw the chaplin standing there and i saw my mom and my sister crying. the next day when they said that they dropped a bomb, it had hit him, i was angry.

i actually hated the military for a little while. i had to act like i didn't. >> how many soldier die? what is four? four? it's for our country, but what is four? >> this is little special rum

from guatemala that was introduced to me by a good friend. his team worked in guatemala for like a year doing a fit mission and kicked ass. one for the brotherhood. >> one for the legion. >> one for the legion. >> the legion brothers. >> you doing all right? good to see you. good to see you. how are you? go goode to see you. >> she's here, man. >> are you excited? >> very. very. >> what do you all think, man? >> you ready to give it a try?

>> make sure it's in neutral. turn the key on, let her rip. >> jesse why don't you sit on it that wayou can balance it because it's not on a stand. there you go. >> get some fuel in that bad boy. [ motorcycle starts ]. >> yeah, woo hoo! >> just hearing the bike, it was almost hearing my dad again. like i'm here, like i'm right

here. >> there are just certain spots around the world where i feel like i could just kind of get lost. you know, just disappear. >> every soldier i ever led in action was wounded or killed. what does that say about me? what does it is a about my abilities as a leader? what does it is a about me as a

soldier? >> everybody was off the hill and i walked back up on the hill to -- where i knew j.d. had been and i just started kinda doing a loop looking for anything i could. i looked. i couldn't find anything. it -- all that could come to mind for me was this poem futility by will fred owen. there was all this -- there was this pervasive naivety about what modern war was about. and then the trenches of europe wiped out a generation. move them into the sun.

gently it's touch woke him once. at home whispering the fields n unsown. always it woke him even in france until this morning and this snow. if anything might rouse him now, the kind old sun will know. think how it wakes theeeds. woke once the seeds of this cold snore. our limbs so dear achieved, sides full nerved, too hard to stir. was it for this, the clay grew

tall but what made fat you too with us sun beams toile to break earth's sleep at all. ♪ "zorba the greek" by mikis theodorakis ♪ ♪ our limbs so dear achieved,

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amp amp . >> you know, what's amazing to me is we're not dead. you know, because they don't put things out like this unless you're dead. >> so there's a difference between a monument and a memorial. that's why it's a monument and not a memorial.

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>> maybe it's the creatures,