>> announcer: the following is a cnn special report. he was the party prince. >> he was photographed incessantly in one nightclub after another. >> who rebelled against royalty. >> he decided he might leave the royal family. >> haunted by his mother's death. >> it destabilized him, caused chaos, fears. >> he struggled to find his way. >> being royal for harry was a burden and a curse. >> she's an american actress.

unlike any royal bride before. >> go back a few generations and everything about meghan markle disqualifies her from marrying harry. >> the queen made an exception and broke from royal protocol. >> do you see any scenario by which harry and meghan overshadow kate and william? >> it was my first thought. >> and modernize the monarchy. >> the world's view of the british monarchy will probably be determined more by harry and meghan than by william and ka , kate,. >> tonight, "a royal match: harry and meghan." >> i never even heard about her until this friend said meghan markle.

i said, right, give me a bit of background. >> it is july 2016 in london when britain's most eligible bachelor, prince harry, is set up on a blind date. >> it was definitely a setup. it was a blind date. >> i was beautifully surprised when i walked into that room and saw her. she was sitting there. i said, i have to up my game. >> harry ups his game. and they begin a whirlwind romance. soon they're vacationing together in botswana, africa. >> we camped out together under the stars for five days out there, which was absolutely fantastic. >> in the months that follow, they date long distance, meeting up in london and toronto where meghan, an actress, is filming her tv show, "suits." >> we can get it out of the way i'm not interested.

>> the whole timekeeping their relationship a secret. >> when they first met, nobody knew about it. they are such a charismatic couple. >> penny juner wrote a biography about harry. >> they kept this relationship quiet. >> which itself is impressive. >> it is impressive. the great fear was always going to be the intrusion of the press because that is what had killed two previous long term relationships. >> relationships with actress cressida bonus and his first love, chelsea. >> chelsea had the most horrible experience, photographers would call out names, bitch, whore, trying to get a reaction from her. i guess she looked at all this and said, do i want this for my life? >> just before he met meghan, the month before, we talked about his private life at the time. >> harry tells the royal

correspondent for britain's "sunday times" about a, quote, massive paranoia he feels in finding a girlfriend. >> harry's great fear was unless he had enough time to get to know someone, if that relationship prematurely became public, they would be absolutely swamped with media interest and that would change the dynamic of his relationship. >> and what happened to his mother is never far from his mind. >> harry and his brother still feel that the paparazzi and press intrusion were certainly partly responsible for his mother's death, and thought, why would anyone want to put up with this for me? >> harry wants to keep his relationship with meghan private as long as he can. but just four months after that first date the news is out. and the paparazzi pounce once again. >> there was a photographer who got inside meghan's house in toronto, the paparazzi were

camping on her mother's front lawn and following and harassing all members of her family. anybody, really, who knew her. >> despite starring in a tv show, meghan is relatively unknown. now the british press wants to know who she is and if she's fit for the royal family. >> she was a woman who has been married and people are fascinated by the fact that she was divorced, people were fascinated by her background, her acting, a career woman, how would that work, being someone in the royal family? that's not what we've seen before. >> they also have not seen someone biracial dating a member of the royal family. and some of the conversation is blatantly racist. >> there was one newspaper headline saying, "straight out of compton," suggesting she was from a gang-ridden neighborhood. >> a journalist recently wrote a book about race, identity, and belonging in britain. >> harry would be dropping around for tea in gangland,

which was clearly racially motivated. >> another issue exploded which was the number of horrific social media racist comments that began to flood in from the darkest, vilest corners of the internet. >> the royal family responds in unprecedented fashion with prince harry's team releasing a statement confronting the, quote, abuse and harassment meghan is facing. >> very unusual for a statement to come out. >> no one understands this better than dickie arbiter. he was press secretary at the palace for 12 years. >> he made the point, this is not a game. it's not a game. it's people's lives. and he was very angry. and it was a sort of "back off" reminder of what they did to his mother. >> why is it that you think that meghan's upbringing, her race, why did that garner so much attention? >> in the past, members of the royal family, princes, would

have married princesses. when harry's father prince charles was looking for a wife, it is also a requirement that a wife should be a virgin, and a member of the church of england. >> you just go back a few generations in the royal family, and everything that you can say about meghan markle disqualifies her from marrying harry. >> kate coyne is the executive editor of "people" magazine. >> this is precisely why you had edward abdicating his throne that he could mary a divorcee. margaret was in love with a divorced man and was not allowed to mary him. >> was charles and diana's marriage a wake-up call that you can try to have somebody perfect but it has to be chemistry and the person has to have the freedom to mary who they want? >> i think it was a lesson that they've learned. >> harry is desperate for history not to repeat itself. and he's anxious to protect

megan. >> harry's statement was the most romantic thing a member of the royal family has ever done. and i think engagement watch was on from that moment. it was, let's wait for the ring. >> the ring comes in november 2017. >> prince harry has announced his wedding engagement to american actress meghan markle. >> and the royal family welcomes meghan with open arms. >> the queen made an exception and broke from royal protocol and invited meghan to spend christmas with the royal family and the queen. that's the first time a royal fiance has ever done that before marrying into the royal family. >> a powerful sign that the monarchy is modernizing and changing. >> the royal family is trying to be more in line with society and the queen wants her grandson to be happy. >> that happiness is something

harry has been searching for most of his life. when we come back, the moment that changes everything. >> he didn't really deal with what life without her meant. it destabilized him and caused chaos for years. been trying to prepare for this day... and i'm still not ready. the reason i'm telling you this is that there will be moments in your life that... you'll never be ready for. your little girl getting married being one of them. ♪ ♪

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>> harry came into the world very different from his brother, who is heralded as next in line to the throne of england. but harry was the spare. >> paul burrell was princess diana's butler. >> so all through harry's formative years, he always knew he was second. >> he was always referred to as the spare. just always second best. and i think that had a profound effect on harry. >> his childhood is also impacted by his parents marital troubles. >> harry grew up in a very tricky household. the prince and princess were never happy together in a marriage that had failed before it even began. >> i remember the times when diana was shut away and quiet or crying, and the boys would write little messages, please don't cry, mummy, and they would put

it under the door. >> when charles is diana divorce, it hits harry hard. then one year later, his mother is killed. harry is just 12 years old. >> this incredibly loving figure who had given him so much warmth and comfort in what was a very difficult childhood and extraordinary upbringing was suddenly gone. >> i remember harry coming back to kensington palace shortly after the funeral. he ran down the corridor and flung himself into my arms and cried. and his tears wet my shirt through. he was devastated. >> harry later admits to itv he has deep regrets about his final phone call with his mother. >> i can't really necessarily remember what i said but all i do remember is probably, you know, regretting for the rest of

my life how short the phone call was. if i had known that was the last time i was going to speak to my mother, the things i would have said to her. looking back on it now, it's incredibly hard. i have to sort of deal with that for the rest of my life. >> guilt and grief he never expresses at the time. >> i think it was a classic case of don't let yourself think about your mum and the grief and the hurt that comes with it, because it's never going to bring her back and it's only going to make you more sad. people deal with grief in different ways. and my way of dealing with it was by just basically shutting it out, locking it out. >> prince harry arrives here, at eton, the prestigious boys' boarding school, the year after his mother's death. although he moves into the same house as his brother william,

harry reportedly struggles academically and is miserable. >> diana always said she never wanted harry to go to eton because he would be compared to his brother's success. and she thought this would be the undoing of harry's confidence. >> prince harry said that he decided that he was going to be a bad boy. >> journalist angela levin interviewed harry last year at kensington palace. >> so the reason he didn't do well there was partly his fault, it was deliberate. >> in 2002, headlines emerge of harry's drinking and marijuana use. for the first time, harry is facing the public pressure that comes with his famous family. did it seem to brits that it was more than just typically teenage antics? >> you know, teenagers do drink too much, they behave badly, it's all part of the growing-up

process. but i personally worried there was something deeper, a touch of self-medication going on. >> after graduating from eton, harry escapes to africa during his gap year for hue mmanitaria work. >> it was an escape from the world of royalty, always being watch watched, always being photographed. he could be very ordinary. >> he spends two months with children in need and others whose parents die from aids. >> he saw there were holes in their lives, absolutely he saw in them something he felt was missing in his life, care, loss, and attention, the loss of his mother. >> harry not only falls in love with the children and the country. he begins a serious romance with a wealthy girl from southern after ri-- africa, chelsea dave.

>> the two of them traveled extensively through africa together. >> chelsea remains a constant in harry's life for years to come. >> she also came into his life at a time when he was missing that female figure to support him. i think chelsea did that, and understood him, and she could understand that he had been through a very difficult time and was still going through a very hard time. >> a very hard time that harry struggles to overcome. when we come back -- >> prince harry got so low that he decided at one point that he might leave the royal family. >> and then meghan's markle struggle with her biracial identity. >> she has heard the names her mother has been called and she's well aware that that is happening for one reason only, it's the color of her mom's skin. discover card.

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meghan markle grows up a world way from the pomp and circumstance of royal life. you hear that someone grew up in los angeles and you think about swimming pools and palm trees and beverly hills.

and meghan markle's childhood in l.a. was not that. >> born in 1981, she is the only child of doria raglan and thomas markle. >> he eventually became the director of photography of "married with children." that was the sort of behind the scenes, less glamorous side of hollywood. >> meghan recounts spending time with her father on the set. >> i grew up on the set after school every day for ten years i was there. it's a very perverse place for a little girl who went to catholic school, no less, to grow up. >> meghan certainly had every reason to be dazzled by tv, film, the whole on-camera experience, from a very young age, because she grew up around it. >> we all knew she wanted to be

an actress. >> christine knudsen is meghan's former teacher. >> she sparkled when she got onstage. she loved it. >> meghan struggles with her biracial identity. >> she was grappling with her identity and trying to understand who she was. her father was white. her mother was black. she says when she would fill out forms there wasn't always a bubble that fit her to fill in. she didn't want to circle the one that was implying that her mother was more important than her father or vice-versa. >> meghan's parents go out of their way to make sure she does not feel different, but special. >> her dad gave her a sort of barbie doll family in which there was a black mom barbie

doll and a white dad ken doll and then a baby barbie doll in each color. even that kind of points to how difficult it is to be meghan at that age, because the children were still either black or white. there was no biracial barbie baby doll for meghan. >> while the markle household deals with race head-on, years of built-up racial tensions in the country explode right in meghan's black yard. >> she was driving i think with her mom and there was debris, she thought it was snowing. it was actually the l.a. riots. >> riots that erupt when four white police officers are acquitted in the beating of a blackman, rodney king, a moment meghan says impacts her at a young age. >> it definitely opened meghan's eyes to the fact that this was a world that was not always going to treat her fairly, and was not

always going to be kind to her or her family. >> i was teaching here at the time, and i think it destroyed kind of that feeling that l.a. is this wonderful place to live, and you have all these different kinds of people, and we all get along, and then this just kind of smashed that. >> it's a grim reality for an 11-year-old to face. and one that would always be present. >> meghan witnessed her mother experiencing racism. she has heard the names her mother has been called. and she is well aware that that is happening for one reason only, that is the color of her mom's skin. >> meghan's early experiences with discrimination are not isolated to race. while watching tv advertisements for a class project, one commercial stands out to her. >> women are fighting greasy pots and pans. >> in the ad they implied that the product was just for women

who were going to be at home doing the cleaning. >> 11-year-old meghan says what she thinks. >> i don't think it's right for kids to grow up thinking these things, that just mom does everything. >> she was irate because she thought, you know, my dad does dishes, it's not just women who do dishes, why would it be women across america? and she wrote a letter. >> i was wondering if you would be able to change your commercial to people all over america. >> and wouldn't you know it, it works. >> the gloves are coming off. people are fighting greasy pots and fans with ivory clear. >> it had to have been such wonderful reinforcement for her at such a young age, that she could make a difference, that she could take a stand and have her voice heard and not be dismissed. when we come back, prince harry and the burden of royalty. >> she really did love him. but being with harry and the

huge circus that came with it was overwhelming for her. >> she didn't want to be a princess. >> i don't think any sane person wants to be a princess. whoever came up with the term "small business," never owned a business. there's nothing small about it. are your hours small? what about your reputation, is that small? when you own your own thing, it's huge. your partnerships, even bigger. with dell small business technology advisors you'll get the one-on-one partnership you need to grow your business. because the only one who decides how big your business can be, is you. the dell vostro 15 laptop, with 7th gen intel® core™ processors. and that's how he intended to keep it. then he met the love of his life. who came with a three foot, two inch bonus. for this new stepdad, it's promising to care for his daughter as if she's his own. every way we look out for those we love

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shows up at a costume party -- >> -- dressed as a nazi. >> he was young, he was very troubled, drinking far too much, and a bit of a loose cannon. >> harry is earning a reputation as reckless and self-destructive. >> he was photographed incessantly going to one nice club aft -- nightclub after another. >> he didn't seem to want to be able to a royal. he really kicked against it. he wanted to be a normal human being. >> when harry arrives at sandherst military academy in may 2005, the pressure is on to

turn over a new leaf. >> he had not had that discipline for so many years. people were concerned that harry wouldn't find his way. >> sandherst is nothing like the lavish royal lifestyle that harry has become accustomed too. throughout the 44-week grueling training course, he's treated like every other soldier. >> it could be said it kind of knocks a bit out of you. >> general lord richard dannitt was chief of the british army. >> the early days, the first five or six weeks, the training is really tough. it encourages people to rely on each other, to help each other. >> harry is one of the guys. yet there are painful reminders he's still a royal. when his unit deploys to iraq in may 2007, harry is forced to stay behind. >> there had been a number of specific threats, specifically aimed at prince harry. and it's for that reason that

i've decided that the risk to prince harry is too great. i think when he was told he couldn't go, it was a really low point for him. >> i didn't join the army thinking i wasn't going on operations. it was hard. one of the main reasons i'm not allowed to be going is because of the fact of who i am. >> but months later, a secret deployment to afghanistan gives harry a taste of the front lines. >> as far as i'm concerned, i'm out here as a normal jtec on the ground and not prince harry. it's nice to be a normal person. he's probably the most normal experience i'm going to get. >> i think he realized the seriousness of life and rose to the responsibilities. >> but after ten weeks on the ground, his mission is leaked and harry is immediately evacuated. >> it wouldn't have taken the taliban or others long to have

searched around and found out where he was. there was a risk to him, but i think also if there was an increased risk to him, there was an increased risk to the other soldiers who were around him and the only sensible and safe thing to do was bring him back. >> he was very angry. to use the words of his private secretary, he was boiling mad and sort of headed for the gutter. >> what did that look like? >> he started drinking heavily. he was fed up with who he was. >> who he was was also impacting his relationship with his long-time girlfriend, chelsea davy. in april of 2011, harry brings chelsea here to westminster abbey for the wedding of his brother, prince william, and kate middleton. there are a million people lining the streets and millions more watching on tv around the world, an intense spotlight that

chelsea struggles to cope with. >> she was determined that would not be her life. she wanted a career of her own. ultimately that was one of the things that ended their relationship. she didn't want to live inside the goldfish bowl. >> harry does not either. he is determined to return to the battlefield. >> when he came, he sort of sat or rather slumped in a chair and said, the trouble is i can't be like a normal young man. but that time of afghanistan had given him ten weeks to be a normal young man and he desperately wanted to replicate that. he accepted, and his private secretary accepted, that probably the only way he could go back was the anonymity of being inside a helicopter. he therefore needed to learn how to fly a helicopter. >> after two years of training harry becomes not only an apache pilot, he is the top gun on his weapons course. >> he got it on his own. it wasn't because he was a prince. he actually had to fight very hard for it.

he was one of the very top apache attack helicopter pilots. >> harry returns to afghanistan in september 2012. >> he did exceptionally well. you would go out there with the anticipation of having to use the apache weapons systems and to bring them to bear without any collateral damage and also to conduct yourself in a way that's safe in the most demanding of environments. >> i actually believe that his success on that apache, on those apache aircraft, was the making of harry. i think harry, who had spent all his life being second best to his brother, being the spare, suddenly found something that he could do and could do better than anybody else. and that gave him confidence that he had never, ever had before. and he just -- it changed him, i think. >> when harry leaves the army

after ten years of service, his future is uncertain. >> i don't think there were any career options for a royal prince. it's easy for william, he's heading towards the throne. i think being royal for harry was a burden and a curse, because he was only the spare. what was his job? what was his way forward? >> as harry finds his way, another romance is on the rocks. this time with his girlfriend of two years, cressida bonas. >> she really did love him. but i think the situation of being with harry and the huge circus that came with it was overwhelming for her. >> i think cressida took one look at what life with harry would have involved and just turned her back on it. >> you know, she didn't want to be a princess. >> i don't think any sane person wants to be a princess. >> who would want to be a royal princess? it's a burden. when we come back, harry

opens up about his royal role. >> he's living this life he's been born into, it's not his choice. asse >> he decided he might leave the royal family. >> and then meghan markle's big break. >> had he gshe got lucky and hi jackpot. what's the value of capital? what's critical thinking like? a basketball costs $14. what's team spirit worth? (cheers) what's it worth to talk to your mom? what's the value of a walk in the woods? the value of capital is to create, not just wealth, but things that matter. morgan stanley the winter of '77.uring i first met james in 5th grade. we got married after college. and had twin boys.

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after graduating from northwestern university, meghan markle moves home to los angeles. she's eager to chase her acting dreams. but the industry is tough. >> that is an industry that is built on judging you and tearing you down and rejecting you and making you second-guess your weight and your skin and your hair and your talent and your poise. >> it's brutal. it's brutal. >> harvey young was meghan's acting professor in alcoholcoll. >> when you leave college, it's a pretty bleak world of laying bare your soul in front of a casting agent and more often than not, being told no.

>> for meghan, her identity struggle is magnified in hollywood. what has she said about how her race impacted getting jobs? >> casting agents weren't sure what to make of her. is she going out for a latina role? is she somehow maybe italian or even middle eastern or is she african-american? is she caucasian? it felt like at times casting agents threw up their hands and went, never mind. >> passed over for big roles, meghan gets some small parts. >> what's going on here? you're way too cute to be a fedex girl. >> she'll have one scene or be there for one moment. she was on a bunch of tv shows, "friends," "beverly hills 90210." she was a "deal or no deal" girl. >> her 20s were brutal, meghan

struggled a lot. to be able to be a successful actress and make a living, that's like winning a lottery ticket. the number of forces that have to combine to get you even the smallest scrap of success are so astronomical. >> meghan auditions for ten years. and then at 29, she lands a significant role. female lead on usa network's legal drama "suits." >> is this all a joke to you? because i take my job seriously. >> she got lucky. she undoubtedly handed in a great audition, a great screen test. she had excellent chemistry with her co-stars. and she hit the jackpot. >> "suits" is an instant hit. >> "suits" radically changed meghan's life. first and foremost, she was now making more money than she had ever made before, ever. >> as the show achieves success, meghan makes big changes in her

life, including ending her two-year marriage to hollywood producer trevor engelson. >> when they met, she was still largely an aspiring actress. he was an aspiring producer. they were essentially at the same place in their careers. and then "suits" really took off. and they weren't going in the same direction anymore. she was filming in toronto. he was in los angeles. there were thousands and thousands of miles between them. >> determined to use her position for good, meghan spends her free time advocating for women. during a panel discussion, meghan recounts how the success of the show emboldened her to stand up for herself. >> every script seemed to begin with, "rachel enters wearing a towel." i said, no, not doing it. at a certain point you feel empowered enough to say no. >> she wanted to encourage other women to feel like they could speak up in the same way.

>> meghan uses her fame to fight for women's equality across the world. as an ambassador for the nonprofit world vision, meghan travels to a remote village in rwanda where young girls work hours every day to access clean water for their families. >> this is the water she's going through all this work to get. >> but all that changes when the world vision team builds a new well. >> these girls are able to stay in school because they aren't walking hours a day to get water. this clean water source has changed the entire community. >> she has a sense that if she's been given a platform, if she has some influence, that there's a responsibility she has to use that for good. >> laura dewar is the chief marketing and development officer for world vision. she travels with meghan to india in january of 2017.

they visit local businesswoman suhani jalala in mumbai. the lack of sanitary products keeps young girls out of school. >> suhani has created a business where they make maxi pads. they go door to door and talk to women about how they handle menstruation. >> meghan comes home and writes an essay in "time" magazine, drawing attention to the barriers to education for girls across india. she continues to mentor suhani to this day. >> she's really more than happy to have a call and just talk about the issues that we might be experiencing, or any help we need from her, whether in terms of fundraising, marketing, or any kind of support like that. >> this is not a celebrity who floats in, who needs a platform

issue to associate with their, quote unquote, brand. this is a woman who has had a desire to help in some way for a very long time promote the faces and stories of women and to begin to elevate them. when we come back, harry and meghan, and the future of the monarchy. >> do you see any scenario by which harry and meghan overshadow kate and william? >> oh, yes, i do. it was my first thought. this could be a problem. sometimes, bipolar i disorder can make you feel unstoppable. but mania, such as unusual changes in your mood, activity or energy levels, can leave you on shaky ground. help take control by asking about your treatment options. vraylar is approved for the acute treatment of manic or mixed episodes of bipolar i disorder in adults.

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. summer 2017, it's been 20 years since princess dayanna's death. >> and speaking about it for the first time. >> it is in your heart and head and stays there for a long time. >> for nearly two decades, harry says he held back his grief. >> he didn't really deal with what life without her meant. for a very long time and when he confronted it it destabilized him and caused chaos. >> i spent along time keeping my

head buried. i didn't want this role, look what happened to my mother. why does it have to happen to me? >> harry even considered a daughter and son sti move. >> did her death affect him differently? >> he was that much younger and last year admitted for the first time to mental health issues, you can't help but having a mental health issue in having to lost a important and not grieving in the same way that you and i are able to do. he wasn't able to do that so he bottled it all out. >> now he is letting it all out and sharing his struggle with

prince william and kate to end the stigma around mental health. >> i never really talked about losing a mom at a young age. what is the point of bringing up the past and it is not going to change it or bring her back. >> and harry choose as future he hopes would make his mother proud. >> a felt an overwhelming connection with the children. >> something he shared with the bbc. >> now i want to try and fill the holes my mother left and that is what it is about for us. trying to make a difference and in making a difference, making her proud. >> he spends time working on the char for the children he met in africa. >> he worked with hiv and aids that is something his mother smshed through that stigma when she was alive. >> and he is focused on the

olympic style competition giving wounded veterans a chance to be defined by more than their skrurs it. >> is life changing for them. >> i think he used his own experience of lost and sadness and bereavement to help these soldiers and the bereavementen doesn't mean losing someone, it means losing yourself, i think too. >> he embraced who he is. it took him a long time to get there. he now fully understands that being prince harry, he can make peoples lives better by putting his name to things. he is making a difference. >> through it all, harry has endeered himself to the public becoming one of the most popular members of the royal family. >> harry is incredibly likable and he is incredibly genuine. what you see is what you get. >> he is so natural with people.

much more i think he is the most natural member of the family. he throws out the rule book. >> that makes him valuable to the monarchy. >> in buckingham palace, they used to say what are you going to do about harry. now they are saying what are you going to do with harry? she a magic bullet. >> he will continue to do things his own way. like proposing to the women he loves not someone british royalty might expect. >> it is a coincidence that he fell in love with someone american, mixed race, divorced and a career woman. >> she is representative of our society and i think that makes it much more user friendly. >> and in meghan, harry found someone who can cope with the role and is not afraid of the

spotlight. >> meghan was enchanting when she appeared in the first time. >> and saturday, may 19th harry and meghan getting married here at the grounds of windsor castle it will be a traditional wedding for a very modern royal couple. >> it has unlimited fairy tale appeal. >> i heard you were amazing in chicago. >> she does what she feels come natural naturally. and harry is the most relaxed. >> do you see a scenario where harry is and meghan over shadow kate and -- >> i do. immediately my first thought. this could be a problem. harry and meghan are a very compelling couple. charismatic, relaxed and easily

and the cameras will follow them. >> william and kate there's a rigidity to them. he kind of has to be because he is going to be king. >> harry and meghan will play a critical coal in the monarchy's future. >> it is going to be determined by harry and meghan than by william and kate and charles and ka mill la. that is a very unusual situation. >> the royal family needs harry to bridge the gap between the people and the monarchy. without in a connection, the royal family wouldn't survive. >> as he has his whole life, prince harry will likely continue to be a star in the royal show. with his irresistible appeal, down to earth charm and like his mother, a natural ability to connect. with meghan by his side, this

modern royal couple are on course to redefine britain's most famous family. and change the monarchy forever. the following is a cnn special report. the most famous and photographed women in the world. a princess with style and substance. a loving mother. >> diana was born to be a mother. >> a passionate advocate. >> and trying to highlight a problem around the world. >> through it all, her every move scrutinized and scandalized. >> she was followed everywhere and she found that