>> jon: that's our show show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. brian williams will be in the studio. here it is, your moment of zen. >> it's a spell bee controversy. many yiddish people saying the winner spell captioning sponsored by

comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: hey, everybody. tephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> stephen: we will tom to the report. good to have you with us. thank you, ladies and gentlemen. thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ]

it's the weather, i don't know. ladies and gentlemen, please, sit down. [ cheers and applause ] sit down, everybody. thank you so much. good to have you with us. and welcome back, me. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. yes, i was on break last week, and, folks, it was great. i finally had time to watch my favorite show, "the colbert report." though i've got to say as usual it was all re-runs. happens every time i'm on break. what are the odds? of course, folks, while i was away, some big news happened. one imagines. i don't know. and we will have more on those stories as soon as i care. oh, hi! i was just reading "fun facts

about wisconsin," a book that, let's say, exists. did you know that many of america's well known cities are named for great leaders. you've got washington d.c., lincoln, nebraska; and wisconsin's own madison, named for famous goth rocker marilyn mad sen. says so right here in, again, this very real book. and madison is nettalled in the subject of the 71st installment of my 434-part series "better know a district." tonight, wisconsin's second, the fightin' second. [ cheers and applause ] madison, wisconsin, is famously one of the most liberal cities in america trailing only san francisco, california, austin, texas and meat-is-murder, oregon. wisconsin second is also where

the ringling brothers founded their famous ringling brothers circus known as the greatest show on earth by people who have never left wisconsin. now the district also contains part of the beautiful wisconsin dells, where you'll find noah's ark officially america's largest water park and unofficially america's largest open-airport a potty. and... true. anyone for a staph infection. step right up. and who has the buckie badgers to represent such a district? it's none other than freshman democratic congressman mark pocan. i sat down with representative pocan in his washington office. congressman, thank you so much for talking to me today. >> thank you. it's an honor. >> is it po-kin. pocan. like the nut. can i call you pokey?

oaky doaky congressman pokey. let's get to it. first of all, congratulations on your first 100 days in congress. >> thank you. i've got to show you something. >> awesome. stephen: blow it out. make a wish. take that one. and that one. >> great. thank you. >> stephen: make a wish. break that in half. put it under your pillow and in the morning you'll have a waxy pillow. okay. >> i saw this. this was fantastic. this is you being sworn in, correct? >> absolutely. stephen: any tears? any tears when you were sworn in? >> no. it was just a real honor to be sworn in. >> did boehner cry? he actually didn't.

stephen: he cries a lot. so nice that your young nephew could be there with you. >> that's my husband, phil. stephen: i'm sorry. that's my husband, phil. stephen: you are gay? yes. stephen: why? it's just who i am. it's the way you're born. >> stephen: no, i was born straight. i was not born gay. you say you were born gay. >> i don't know if you're gay. stephen: but you thought i was. you guessed. i assume you support federal recognition of gay marriage until your husband forgets to take out the garbage, am i right? men! can't live with them. legally can't live with them in some states. >> that's a problem. stephen: what is it about my god-sanctioned marriage that you most want to destroy? >> nothing. in fact... >> stephen: you are. you're harming it. >> i've harmed your marriage. stephen: you have. in what way. stephen: because if i could have gotten gay-married, why

wouldn't i have done that instead? guys are great. >> well, you could get divorced potentially and marry a man if that's... >> stephen: now you're suggesting that i get divorced, and you say you're not destroying my marriage. >> you haven't gotten divorced. stephen: but you just tempted me with that. you should get divorced. >> i'm not tempting you. stephen: i'm not tempted at all. because i'm now married. i believe in the oath i took. the oath to be married, and i am. okay. there's nothing i can do about that now. as a freshman congressman, you don't have much of a record for me to attack yet. >> that's great. stephen: what are some of the things you would like to accomplish so i can attack it? >> making sure that we're providing adequate health care for all of our people. >> stephen: you mean obama care. the act, right. stephen: have you been placed on a death panel yet? >> no, there's no death panels. stephen: when does that start. >> there won't be any. stephen: have you read all of obama care. >> no. stephen: you admit you don't

know whether there are death panels. >> there are not death panels. i've talked to people who have read. >> stephen: maybe they're on the death panels and they don't want to tell you because they've said we don't want to give you health care and put you to death. the people who disagree with obama care when they go to the hospital instead take them off to the hunger games and they fight. >> i don't think that's in the bill. >> stephen: you don't think so but you don't know. >> i'm sure it's not in the bill. >> stephen: let's agree to disagree. do you want to do that? okay. this next subject touchy. it might disturb some viewers. my understanding is that you used to be a magician. >> yeah, i paid for college doing imagine ib shows and bar tending. >> stephen: how long were you turning tricks? (inaudible). >> stephen: why did you stop? i got a job. i started a business. and i got real busy.

>> stephen: when you're not in d.c. you work at your sign-making store with phil-frank who is your partner. >> my husband. stephen: you don't have a business partner named bill frank. >> he's my husband. stephen: so business partner is code for... do you have to get married to your business partner in wisconsin? >> no. stephen: that was a choice. no. stephen: okay. is your gay business partner or just your business partner. >> just my business partner. stephen: that part is not gay. >> no. stephen: so it is a choice when you are gay and when you're not. >> the choice to be business partner is not a choice to be gay. >> stephen: the story falling apart a bit here. >> no it's not. stephen: in 1992 you supported a ban on bear wrestling. you used to bring bears into coliseum and they would get kind of drugged up and then some person from the audience would attempt to wrestle that bear. >> stephen: we shouldn't drug them when they wrestle. they don't have a chance.

should we give them knives? how are they supposed to fight people. >> we could just leave bears alone. >> stephen: but they started it. i don't think so. stephen: last question: tell me about your district. >> it's just an exceptional place. all of south central wisconsin is an exceptional place to live. madison is our capital city of the state. >> stephen: i love the farmers market in madison. cheese curds, which, no offense, the gay is cheese, right? >> it's a very popular cheese. stephen: they squeak when you bite 'em, just like gay people do. when you bite a gay person they squeak. >> i think anyone would squeak. stephen: i've never bitten anybody but gay people. congressman, thank so much for talking to me today. >> thank you. stephen: let's put wisconsin up on the board.

[ cheers and applause ] oh, looks like someone just got bit right on the cheese curds. we'll be right back. m!=$-x

[ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: welcome back, everybody. thanks, folks. nation, if you watch this show, you know that i will defend our second amendment right to keep

and bear arms from all who would attack it and that includes guns. for too long they have demanded that in order for to use them, you have to know how to use them. get this. aim and pull the trigger at the same time? how is my hand supposed to know what my eye is seeing? it's tyranny. that's why i am as pumped as a 12 gauge about a breakthrough in skill-free killing. it's called the tracking point rifle, and it's got its own video. >> tracking point introduces the world's first precision-guided firearm, the new shooting system that puts jet fighter lock and launch technology in arrival enabling anyone to hit moving targets at extended ranges. >> stephen: wow! it's like you're a fighter pilot taking out osama bin antelope.

here's how tracking point's digital brain takes out the troublesome human element of where to aim and when to fire. >> the shooter presses the attack button to paint the target and persistently lock on regardless of the target's movement. track. the networkd tracking scope's place tick computer instantly accounts for all range and environmental factors. x-act: the shooter aligns the reticle with the tag and then squeezes and holds the guided trigger. the system allows the trigger to launch the round at the perfect moment to ensure impact with your target. >> stephen: finally, a solution to the age-old problem: sometimes the animal stands a chance. because, folks, the tracking point will take down game at extreme distances because the smart scope takes everything into consideration including environmental conditions. >> typical hot element include wind speed, pressure and

temperature. >> stephen: so when you shoot a wildebeest and then have to cross a time zone to go pick it up, you'll know whether to pack an umbrella. plus the tracking point scope comes complete with its own built-in wi-fi server. now you'll be able to continue to track your prey even if it leaves the starbucks. and, folks, it's that... [ cheers and applause ] and that internet connectivity finally fulfills the true promise of the second amendment. letting your gun make facebook friends. >> your network tracking scope records each shot sequence and takes photos of each tag, shot and result. hit the download button and your videos onphotos on the network tracking scope will transfer into your phone. you can then go to your photo

browser and email, text, tweet or share via social media. >> stephen: you can post a picture of you making a duck face while your gun posts a picture of you blowing off a duck's face. [ cheers and applause ] and, of course, the cutting-edge tech extends to safety features, too, because you can password protect your scope totally safe because without a password, your gun cannot do the tag track exact and will merely still operate as a firearm. so do not forget your password or you'll only be able to kill stuff you can see. now, one downside to the tracking point rifle is that it costs up to $22,000 so it is slightly more expensive than if you'd just taken out a mafia contract on a gazelle.

but... that's a nervous gazelle. [ cheers and applause ] but i have a bigger issue with the tracking point, folks. sure it makes killing animals as easy as pointing at them. but you still have to stand up and go outside and that's more effort than i like to give my outdoor activities. so i'm calling on the good folks at tracking point to develop a precision-guided firearm that can precision guide itself to where the animals are. leave me out of it. i'm thinking maybe arrival hot-glued to a roomba. a boomba, if you will. but please keep the vacuuming feature because i want it to be a clean kill.

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which is awesome. t.j.maxx and marshalls. two awesome ways to score. >> stephen: welcome back, everybody. my guest tonight is the longest serving congressman in american

history. i'm going to ask him with what eisenhower smelled like. please welcome john dingell. [ cheers and applause ] john dingell, thank you so much for being here. sit down, sir. good to have you here. this is an historic week for america. >> thank you, stephen. stephen: you're welcome. you are what they call the dean of the house, kind of history, the memory of the house of representatives because is it this friday... >> this friday. stephen: ... you'll become the longest serving member of congress in history. >> that's right. [ cheers and applause ] >> if i were president i'd be called the father of the house. >> stephen: okay. but you're not. >> i'm not. stephen: all right. what was it like in 1955 when you started in the congress. what was it like for a freshman

back then. >> we were supposed to be seen and not heard. but on top of that, i walked in the day they were having a commemoration of my dad's service. >> stephen: because your father represented the same district before you did. >> that's right. so i had the privilege of getting up and thanking his friends and colleagues of whom he had many in the congress on both sides of the aisle. >> stephen: what, what, what? it happens, stephen, it did. stephen: we cured that. (laughing). stephen: but go ahead. i had the privilege of telling them how dad would have felt to hear them saying these things about him, how grateful i was to them for their remembering my dad and also how grateful i was to them for welcoming me to succeed what i thought was one of the great americans. >> stephen: you're implying that republicans -- you're a

democrat. >> yes. stephen: did you run as a democrat or you a whig or a bull moose back then? because the parties have changed over the years. the parties have changed over the years. >> they have. they have. >> stephen: you always ran as a democrat. >> i got my democracy with my mother's milk. i am a democrat. >> stephen: it's a family show. it's a family show. i think we have to delete that part. but you were actually in washington because you were there before 1955. what year did you actually go to washington. >> in 1933 when dad was sworn in in the house. >> stephen: how old were you at the time. >> i was six. stephen: six years old in washington d.c. how how young are you now? >> 86. stephen: 86. for 80 years you've been in washington. what's the biggest change you've seen in 80 years in washington? >> i think loss of collegiality. stephen: what is collegiality? what does that mean?

>> good will. good humor. a willingness to work together. friendliness. >> stephen: but a willingness to work together implies to me that you don't believe in your position, that you have a position and oppose your position. now, listen. if you have a position on a law or some action of congress and i have a different position, if i want something else to happen, if i give you an inch, i'm totally wrong. if you're right at all, i'm totally wrong. and the proof of my rightness is your complete wrongness. >> i disagree. stephen: you disagree. you're totally wrong for disagreeing with me. >> well, there are 435 of us under the constitution who were sent to washington and we're told to work out and to solve great problems of the nation and to work for the people we serve. and at some point in the middle or somewhere there is a point

where we could come to an honorable agreement. compromise is an honorable word. [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: you mean compromise on historic legislation, what are the achievements or what are the things that you were part of, the bills that were passed that you're most proud of. >> the single one is 1964 civil rights act. [ cheers and applause ] we stopped the nation from being torn apart. and just a few years later if we look we can see in the white house we have an african-american who wouldn't have been able to vote in many states before we passed that legislation. >> stephen: that brings me to one of my biggest beefs with you. african-americans get the right to vote. i'm not a bad guy. i'm a good guy. but you've been in congress longer than hawaii has had a

congressman. >> and longer than alaska. stephen: longer than alaska too. did you vote in congress to include hawaii? >> yes. stephen: so we can blame obama on you. >> (laughing) stephen, would you give his father and mother a little credit. >> stephen: you are the father of the house. congressman, thank you so much for joining me. michigan representative john dingell. im7qk